Bewildered Podcast: "Wallowing in Magic"

Hosts: Martha Beck and Rowan Mangan
Date: January 28, 2026

Overview

In this engaging and laughter-filled episode, Martha and Rowan pick up where they left off in the previous episode about "authorizing your knowing"—that deep, non-cognitive sense of guidance that can lead to a more authentic, joyful life. The focus here is on what comes next: embracing the often unconventional, magical-feeling steps that follow when you let your inner truth—not culture—set your path. Through personal stories and playful banter, they discuss how to "wallow in magic," write the code of your own life, trust synchronicity, and create a reality that feels fun, meaningful, and genuinely your own.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Awkwardness with Cultural Small Talk and Authentic Connection

• Rowan and Martha open with an honest (and hilarious) discussion about the pain of small talk and not fitting in with mainstream social expectations. This discomfort, they argue, is linked to being "bewildered" by cultural norms that silence authentic knowing.
• Memorable Quote:

  "And then they proceeded to do three and a half days of small talk just to show us how it's done...I literally thought I was gonna have to die to get out of that room."
  —Rowan ([03:02])

2. "Authorizing Your Knowing" and Life as a Programmable Video Game

• Martha describes the sensation of living as an avatar in a video game—except that once you "authorize your knowing," you start to "write the code" for your own life rather than just follow preset paths.
• This awakening, she says, is what she calls "wallowing in magic," where life becomes increasingly responsive and synchronistic.
• Memorable Quote:

  "You start to feel and see things that make you feel more that you are actually writing the code for the game. You're no longer just knocking around, dealing with the world as it is. You are somehow creating what's happening."
  —Martha ([16:36])

3. The Technology of Magic vs. Cultural Programming

• The hosts discuss "the technology of magic" as a legitimate way of engaging with the world, contrasting it with what most Western cultures dismiss as mere magical thinking.
• Martha gives anthropological examples to illustrate how indigenous technologies can be dismissed as magic—but are just very different ways of knowing.
• Quote:

  "'The plants gave us the recipe.' They sing and they tell us the recipe and we say magic. And they look at us and go, no—technology."
  —Martha ([18:22])

4. Recognizing Authentic Desire: The "Get-It-Up" Test

• The core test for whether a yearning is authentic (essence-driven) or culturally implanted is whether your body, heart, and soul "get it up" for the thing.
• If you can't muster true enthusiasm, it's probably not your path—no matter how much the culture insists it should be.
• Quote:

  "It's like you can either get it up or you can't get it up...You know, it means your excitement is up."
  —Rowan ([24:08])

• Quote:

  "The mind is the slave of the culture...it will lead us straight down the lines of the cultural rules and maybe to our own misery."
  —Martha ([24:48])

5. Synchronicities as Feedback from the Game

• When you follow these authentic pulls and start "writing the code," life responds with synchronicities—"little shiny things" that guide you, almost like breadcrumbs.
• The process is reciprocal: you are co-creating with the universe (or the 'game').
• Quote:

  "It's almost as if something wants you to want something. And it is very much like falling in love."
  —Martha ([27:18])

6. Personal Examples: Following Magic Into Real Life

• The hosts recount big and small examples of wallowing in magic:
  • Martha's client who chose to stay with her beloved horse rather than accept a high-status job she didn't want ([21:00]).
  • Their own move from Pennsylvania to upstate New York, guided by a series of odd, undeniable nudges and synchronicities ([28:22]).
  • Manifesting friendships (such as with Liz Gilbert) and even their dog Bilbo through desire, vivid imagination, and storytelling ([53:01], [54:58]).
• Quote:

  "We decided we were living perfectly happily in Pennsylvania, and then a series of nudges told us to move to this area, and we did. And the more we turned our head in the direction of here, the more synchronicities piled up to say, yes, ridiculous. Yes. Yes."
  —Rowan ([28:48])

7. Storytelling as the Act of Magic

• The way we create our lives is by telling stories first in our own minds, then to others.
• The "juice" or excitement in a story is the key—if it makes you come alive, it's a sign you're writing generative code.
• Quote:

  "I actually think that the component of writing the game is storytelling...If the story has juice, you can get it up for that story."
  —Martha ([33:25])

8. The Three N’s: Notice, Narrow, Name

• Martha describes her practical magic methodology:
  • Notice what genuinely excites you or carries “juice”.
  • Narrow it down by focusing in on the specifics or most intense version.
  • Name it—articulate or claim what it is, but only once it’s basically manifest.
• Quote:

  "You notice first what you can get it up for; you narrow it down to the most intense version of that feeling...Mostly you'll go towards something by noticing and narrowing, narrowing, narrowing, until you come up with just a few options and go to the one that has the most heat."
  —Martha ([39:21])

9. Wallowing in Advance: Imagination as Creation

• Both hosts emphasize the importance of "wallowing" in the sensory, emotional experience of what you desire before it arrives.
• The fantasy should feel delicious and enjoyable in itself—even before it manifests.
• Martha and Rowan share vivid mental movies they relished, from book deals to specific friendships to arriving at Martha's ranch ([44:02], [46:22]).
• Memorable Moment:
  Martha:

  "I could hear the utensils clinking and I could smell that restaurant. It was easy. It felt like it was given to me. And it went on and on and on and every single day I enjoyed it." ([44:08])

10. What Happens When Magic Becomes Normal: The Dew Point

• Over time, as desires manifest and the cycle repeats, “magic” becomes the new normal:

  "When the vision of the thing you want has been wallowed in long enough, it starts to feel normal. Magic feels normal, or what we would call the technology of magic feels normal. So the way I put it is, it's like the dew point of magic is normal."
  —Martha ([60:34])

• The more you experience these creative successes, the more momentum you get. This is why, in fairy tales, it's the older "witches" or "sorcerers" who wield the most magic—they have built up evidence.

11. Challenges Along the Path

• It's not always smooth. There’s often a period of frustration or dissonance before reality catches up with the potency of your inner world.
• Adventuring off the beaten (cultural) path takes courage and willingness to be misunderstood.
• Quote:

  "The battle is not only with...circumstance around you. The battle is with your own disbelief that what you're wallowing in is real."
  —Martha ([63:54])

12. Gratitude and Recapitulation: How to Keep the Magic Flowing

• Continually telling (and retelling) stories of magic, wallowing in gratitude, and sharing them with others, keeps the process alive and vital.
• Quote:

  "Wallowing in the ones that have happened—another word for that is gratitude, right?"
  —Rowan ([52:45])

13. The Opposite of Paranoia: Pronoia

• Trusting that “everything is conspiring to support you” — the hosts jokingly call this “pronoia.”
• Quote:

  "Instead of being afraid the world is out to get you, you become crazily convinced that everything is out to help you."
  —Martha ([61:58])

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "People are terrifying." —Rowan ([05:44])
• "I have to prevaricate for a bit. You can make things work, but they become more difficult and boring and awful the further you push them down. I'm going to live the culturally approved life. And when you let go of that and you go with the...magical version...that's when things start coming together magically or seemingly by magic." —Martha ([41:14])
• "Things happen to help you, and they can be from the most trivial to the most incredible emergency." —Martha ([27:18])
• "Our magic should be more powerful as the years go by." —Ani DiFranco, quoted by Rowan ([51:43])
• On manifesting their dog, Bilbo:

  "You got out of the car and said, 'Here, Bilbo.' And this dog came running straight to you. He has always responded to that name." —Martha ([56:35])

Essential Timestamps

• Cultural small talk & not fitting in: [01:10]–[07:45]
• Authorizing Knowing & video game metaphor: [16:35]–[18:04]
• Technology of Magic: [18:04]–[19:29]
• Authentic desire—'get it up' concept: [24:08]–[25:56]
• Client's story—choosing the horse over the job: [20:23]–[22:02]
• Synchronicity and moving to NY: [28:22]–[29:31]
• Three N’s: Notice, Narrow, Name: [39:21]–[41:14]
• Personal fantasy stories—manifesting friendships, publishing, dogs: [44:02]–[56:56]
• Concept of magic's dew point—when magic becomes normal: [60:34]–[62:22]
• Facing friction and believing in the magic: [62:22]–[63:54]
• Pronoia—everything is conspiring to help you: [61:58]
• Importance of gratitude & storytelling: [52:45]–[54:13]

Tone, Style, and Takeaways

Martha and Rowan bring warmth, humor, self-deprecation, and plenty of laughter to "Wallowing in Magic". The episode is both practical and delightfully weird: they don’t offer rigid steps, but instead invite listeners to honor their true desires, embrace imagination, and enjoy the process—even when it means being out of sync with societal norms.

At its heart, this episode champions freeing yourself from external programming, trusting your instincts and body’s signals, following the magic of synchronicity, and actively wallowing in joy (past, present, and future). In doing so, you help “write the code” for a kinder, wilder, and more magical existence.

Quick Summary List

• Cultural rules stifle authentic knowing—awkwardness is a clue.
• “Get it up” for what excites you—otherwise, it’s not your path.
• Synchronicities are signs you’re collaborating with the universe.
• Storytelling is literal magic—a way to shape reality.
• Notice, Narrow, Name: move from excitement to clarity.
• Wallow in sensory joy of your wishes, even before they appear.
• With time and experience, magic becomes normal—the “dew point.”
• Don’t be afraid to be misunderstood; joy is the guide, not conformity.
• Gratitude feeds future magic; retelling your story keeps it alive.
• Pronoia: let yourself believe the world wants to help you.

Welcome to Bewildered, where living true to yourself—and laughing about it—is the real magic.