Bewildered Podcast: "Wilder Together"

Hosts: Martha Beck & Rowan Mangan
Episode Date: October 2, 2024

Episode Overview

In "Wilder Together," Martha Beck and Rowan Mangan introduce their new digital community, Wilder: A Sanctuary for the Bewildered. This episode explores the profound longing for authentic connection beyond societal norms, inviting listeners ("the other butterflies") to join an intentional space for creativity, healing, and transformation. Through candid storytelling, science geekery, and playful banter, Martha and Rowan trace their own journeys from solitude to building community, arguing that collective innovation and well-being flourish when we gather as our truest selves.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Need for Authentic Community (00:05 – 01:36)

• Introduction of “Wilder: A Sanctuary for the Bewildered,” an online space for people seeking deeper connection and transformation.
  • Rowan: “It’s our new community space…for all of us who know there’s another step ready for us, but we can’t quite find it.” (00:17)
  • Martha: “It’s kind of an online village where people like us, who want to find our true nature…can get together, commune, make friends and do things.” (00:44)
• Highlights the importance of collective growth in “troubled times.”
• Description of community features: weekly hangs, creative sessions, art-making, meditations, and thematic personal development.

2. The "Other Butterflies": Being Weird in a Conformist World (04:02 – 10:15)

• Martha shares her journey growing up neurodivergent and gay in a Mormon community, always feeling she didn’t fit in.
  • “One big reason [for being a writer] is you can have a whole career and be completely alone.” (04:53)
  • She describes sensing an unknown “team” of like-minded souls (“other butterflies”) and writing Finding Your Way in a Wild New World as a message to them—even though publishers doubted it made sense.
• Rowan describes her parallel sense of alienation and her survival strategy of pursuing what others ignored.
  • “There was always a tension for me between people and not people. I needed so much time to recover from social energy…” (09:10)
  • Tried to address cultural brokenness through political science and international development before encountering Martha’s work.

3. The Power and Challenge of Solitude (10:58 – 11:54)

• Both hosts reflect on periods where solitude felt necessary for healing and creativity.
• Martha: “I had gone off to live in the woods and meditate, be as close to a Zen monk as I could be…But that internal yearning…the force was so strong that I couldn’t deny it. This period of solitary preparation was over and we needed to…include other people in our worldscape.” (10:58)

4. The Shift: From Broadcasting to Dialogue (11:54 – 13:20)

• The podcast started as a one-way conversation but evolved because listeners’ responses highlighted the need for real, ongoing dialogue.
  • “We were suffering from the fact that we knew you were there... but it’s a one-way conversation.” (11:54)
  • “The same push that told me go out and be with people was saying…‘the podcast is all very well, but the conversation should be a conversation.’” (12:49)

5. “Find the Others”: The Mission and the Moment (13:20 – 15:24)

• Rowan recalls a transformative memory at Londolozi, learning of Terence McKenna’s advice—“Find the others.”
  • Rowan: “A moment, something happens, something clicks in for you and there’s like this three-dimensional, full five-sense photograph taken…and I can like go into that moment when he said ‘find the others’ and remember almost every detail…” (14:49)
• The realization emerges that a dedicated space for “other butterflies” is essential.

6. Creating Sanctuary & Healing from Cultural Trauma (15:24 – 17:08)

• The first step in their vision is providing a sanctuary—a safe space online for those traumatized by trying to conform.
  • Rowan: “We're all a little bit traumatized from the culture and from the long term wear and tear…trying to mask and behave and be around people who are not like us...” (15:25)
  • “We’re not that we don’t want weirdos. We just want the right kind of weirdos. And that’s you, by the way.” (16:09)
• Emphasizes digital space as authentically significant (not “less than” in-person).

7. The Science of Collective Creativity (19:05 – 22:34)

• Martha introduces the concept of the “adjacent possible”: ideas and transformative states are triggered when people gather and interact—often digitally.
  • “There is a word for an idea that has not quite been born…held in fragments in the minds of many people...and they have to be together for that to happen. It’s called the adjacent possible.” (19:49)
• Discusses network effects and “Cleaver’s Law”: when a group grows, individual and collective creativity increase exponentially.
  • “When something is 10 times larger than something else, it is 17 times more creative.” (21:12)
  • “Every person that joins this community makes every other person in the community exponentially more creative.” (22:18)

8. The Meaning of “Wilder Together” (22:34 – 24:41)

• “Wilder Together” expresses the intuitive truth that when divergent, creative people are pulled together, “some crazy shit” happens (23:45).
• Creativity here means not just “the arts,” but personal and collective transformation.
  • “The creation of your own personality, your presence in the world, the way you do your hair.. everything that changes... is part of the creation.” (23:57)
• Increased creativity correlates with decreased anxiety.
  • “When creativity turns on in the brain, anxiety turns off. So…the group accelerates your creativity, it’s going to decelerate your anxiety.” (24:41)

9. Nuts & Bolts: What the Wilder Community Is (24:59 – 27:26)

• Wilder is a digital app (“like Instagram, but just full of other butterflies”); accessible 24/7 across devices; “a sanctuary for the bewildered.”
• Features: ongoing communal chat, support, live stream events (including the beloved “Arty Friday Hangs”), art-making together, creative collaboration, mutual support, and presence from Martha, Rowan, and others.
  • “If your heart has been yearning for the next thing... we can’t get to that adjacent possible... by ourselves. We have to do it together. We have to find the others.” (26:33)
  • Martha (on the goal): “Let’s get together and save the world.” (27:24)

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On Community Yearning:
  • “I kept telling publishers and editors, I was sure this group was out there, and they thought I was crazy.” —Martha (06:29)
• On Solitude vs. Connection:
  • “There was always a tension for me between people and not people.” —Rowan (09:10)
• On Being the Other Butterfly:
  • “Doesn’t play well with others, right?” —Rowan (07:37)
• On Sanctuary:
  • “We’re not that we don’t want weirdos. We just want the right kind of weirdos. And that’s you, by the way.” —Rowan (16:09)
• On Collective Creativity:
  • “Every person that joins this community makes every other person in the community exponentially more creative. How amazing is that?” —Martha (22:18)
• On ‘Find the Others’:
  • “Find the others.” —The mantra that stuck with Rowan (14:49)
• On the Wilder Mission:
  • “We create sanctuary. We get creative together. I don’t know. Save the world. What do you think?” —Rowan (27:18)

Notable Timestamps

• 00:05: Introduction to the episode’s unique focus and the launch of Wilder.
• 04:02: Martha’s personal journey: being “weird” and seeking her true team.
• 07:37: Rowan introduces the “other butterflies” metaphor and her own history.
• 10:58: Martha on moving from solitude to seeking connection.
• 13:20: The “Find the Others” conversation at Londolozi.
• 15:25: Rowan on the need for sanctuary from cultural trauma.
• 19:05: Martha on the “adjacent possible” and network effects.
• 22:34: Discussion of how collective creativity accelerates transformation.
• 24:59: Description of Wilder’s practical features and vision.
• 27:18: Closing mission: “Save the world.”

Tone & Style

Playful, candid, nerdy, and encouraging—a seamless mix of Martha’s philosophical depth, Rowan’s dry wit, and a mutual reverence for earnest community-building. Regular bursts of laughter, wordplay, and references to past podcast moments keep things welcoming and light—even as complex concepts are explored.

Summary

"Wilder Together" chronicles Martha and Rowan's shift from solitary self-discovery to communal transformation, inviting listeners to join their newly launched digital sanctuary. Through story, science, and spirited banter, they argue that healing and creativity thrive not in isolation, but in the wild, collaborative synergy of finding the others. The message: If you’re bewildered, sensitive, weird, and yearning for a kinder world, you’re not alone—and your next best step just became possible.

Learn more or join the community at wildercommunity.com.