BigDeal Podcast #103 | Mel Robbins: The Trick To Unlocking A Happier Life

Host: Codie Sanchez
Guest: Mel Robbins
Date: November 12, 2025

Episode Overview

In this deeply candid and energizing conversation, entrepreneur and best-selling author Mel Robbins sits down with Codie Sanchez to dissect the mental blueprints and tactical habits behind a happier, more fulfilled, and higher-achieving life. Drawing from her own highs, devastating lows, and evidence-based self-coaching strategies, Mel shares intimate stories and no-nonsense advice—covering everything from entrepreneurship in the trenches, self-sabotage, jealousy, family, burnout, failure, reinventing yourself, and her infamous “Hot 15” morning rule.

Their discussion strips away the veneer of “toxic positivity” and hustle culture to reveal what it takes to bounce back from failure, stop self-sabotage, and build a business and life that feels meaningful—regardless of where you’re starting.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The “Hot 15”: Fight for Your First 15 Minutes

• Mel’s Core Principle:
  “If you want to make more money, you have to fight for the first 15 minutes of the day. I call it the Hot 15. I have built my business 15 minutes at a time.” (00:00, 55:26)
• Why it works: The morning is the only time you control—before you’re flooded by outside influences, obligations, or emergencies.
• How to use it:
  • Keep your phone out of the bedroom.
  • Wake up, ignore your phone, and focus on one meaningful task or step before anything else.
  • “What's the one thing that if I made progress on it, it would be a good day? Don't try to do it all, just a little toward the thing that matters most.” (56:40)
• Mel’s routine:
  • Wake up, make the bed, go to the bathroom, brush her teeth, then “high five” herself in the mirror—a simple neurobic action that reinforces a positive mindset. (58:29)

Mel’s Rock Bottom: Lessons from Nearly Losing Everything

• Candid recounting of personal and financial collapse:
  Mel shares how she and her husband went $800k into debt after a failed attempt to expand a restaurant business during the 2008 recession, compounding stress, and shame.

  • “We cashed out our life savings, 401ks, kids’ college funds... by the time the second location was open, there was no money left.” (02:25)
  • “I turned [my husband] Chris into the enemy… it’s easier to be angry than it is to be afraid.” (07:16)

• Key takeaway:
  Failure is a rite of passage for any entrepreneur—it’s often lonely, painful, and humbling, but survivable and ultimately transformative.

  • “If you’re in business, I’m going to tell you something: you will fail. You will lose money. It’s the price of entry.” (07:58)

Getting Unstuck: When You Know What to Do, But Can’t Do It

• Codie & Mel on paralysis:
  “If you’ve ever felt stuck knowing what to do but not doing it, this one’s for you.” (00:12)

• Breaking the freeze:

  • Acknowledge your negative self-talk and discouragement.
  • Leverage pain as motivation: “The pain of avoiding what you need to do eventually gets harder than just doing it.” (31:52)
  • Use experiments to test what you want: “Try the thing you think you want before you leap.” (16:41)

Career Pivots, Reinvention & Taking Action

• Mel’s path from law to coaching, radio, and writing:

  • Hated her law job—knew she was “the world’s lousiest employee.” (09:36)
  • Did coaching calls in borrowed conference rooms while on the clock to test her business idea. Crafted rules for herself, e.g., consistently hitting a base income for 4 months before quitting her job. (19:18)
  • “You want to create a math equation for yourself that is tied to your psychology.” (19:18)

• Experiment before you leap:

  • Thought she wanted to run a bakery, but a single Saturday shift changed her mind.
  • “Why I was interested in a bakery is the experience—not the work. Sometimes you’re chasing the feeling, not the job.” (16:41)

Self-Sabotage, Mindset & Letting Go

• On self-sabotage and personal responsibility:
  • “You have to admit to yourself, this motherfucker’s not gonna get these liens off this house. If I want to keep this house, it's on me.” (29:24)
• On negative motivation:
  • “I wasn’t trying to be brilliant or happy. I was trying to pay the bills... Sometimes desperation is your best motivator.” (31:52)
• On jealousy:
  • “Jealousy is blocked desire. And what is it blocked by? It’s blocked by your belief that you can’t have it too.” (70:28)
  • Use envy as a signal for your own repressed ambition. “When I feel jealousy, I ask, what is it about that I want for myself?” (74:41)

Tactics for Happiness & Mental Health

• Small Moments of Joy:
  • Prescription for high-functioning depression: intentionally build small joy breaks into each day—even a few minutes will reset your outlook. (47:21, 49:25)
• Recall past happiness:
  • Scroll through old photos and list what made you happy in the past. Replicate small things now.
• Set ‘traps’ to help new habits:
  • Lay out exercise clothes the night before. Remove phone temptation by keeping it outside the bedroom.
• Hacks for sleep:
  • At night, write down every to-do you didn’t get to. “You’re closing tabs in your brain… your brain runs on open loops.” (67:22)

Making Impact, Building a Business, and the Power of Ownership

• Businesswise:

  • Own as much as you can—Mel owns her content, her IP, her book rights, and especially her audiobook rights.
  • “An advance is a loan for your ego with shitty math.” (83:21)
  • “An audiobook is the world’s best rental property at a beach town. There’s no cost.” (84:14)

• Obsess over who you serve:

  • Mel’s team curates a daily “impact email” to showcase real stories of audience impact—keeps the mission and audience front and center for employees and partners. (103:00)
  • “We are maniacal about giving that person value.” (81:34)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On starting late and reinvention:
  “Start late, start over, start scared, start again, just start.” (02:05, repeated throughout)

• On keeping it real:
  “I’m not interested in being smart. I’m interested in being useful. If I can save anybody the heartache I’ve caused myself, that’s an incredible way to live your life.” (01:09, 23:03)

• On shame, vulnerability, and liberation:
  “It’s not vulnerable to talk about what’s actually happening. It’s way harder to lie and carry things on your own.” (23:33)

• On ownership:
  “I do joint ventures. I own all my content. Publishers do not own my books. I do.” (83:09)

• On the experience of her live show:
  “At the age of 56, to do something that far out of your comfort zone—it changed me forever. On my deathbed, I’ll remember that experience with my daughters as one of the highlights of my life.” (97:36)

Memorable Stories & Segments with Timestamps

• Mel’s $800k Debt & Fallout
  Mel recounts losing it all, turning her husband into “the enemy,” and clawing her way out: (02:25–08:54)

• From Law Firm to First Side Hustle
  Mel on coaching clients in secret and creating a leap plan: (19:18–20:33)

• Jealousy as a Compass
  Mel’s admission of resenting friends’ success, and how she flipped jealousy into fuel: (70:16–76:53)

• The Hot 15 & Morning Rules
  Deep dive on practical tactical morning routine and habit traps: (55:26–59:52, 62:36–63:21)

• Behind the Scenes of Mel’s Live Show
  The stress, mess, and triumph of her interactive touring event: (87:04–97:36)

Actionable Takeaways

• Fight for the first 15 minutes of your day. Protect your focus before the world invades.
• Leverage the signals from negative emotions—shame, jealousy, anger—as calls to action.
• Take small experiments before big leaps. Don’t quit too soon—test your dreams on the side.
• To get unstuck, confront reality honestly, then take the tiniest next step.
• Guard your own mental happiness by crafting moments of joy, and keep a “happiness list” to remind yourself what works.
• Own your intellectual property in business. Avoid giving away your audio/book rights lightly.
• Obsess about your customer’s and audience’s life—and let that guide your decisions.
• Dare to be the “villain” for the sake of truth and impact—don’t hide your failures or low points.
• Build systems (like “impact emails”) to keep your team’s eyes on the real human mission.

Final Note

This episode is a masterclass in resilience, self-leadership, and the raw, unvarnished realities of creative and entrepreneurial success—laden with both hard-won tactics and cathartic, laugh-out-loud honesty. Mel Robbins doesn’t just offer advice—she models the courage to start, to be honest, and to try again, especially when it’s messy and vulnerable.

For more from Mel, check her tour info at melrobbins.com or follow her on her podcast and books. If you want to change your life, as she and Codie say: Just Start.