BigDeal Podcast #95: How To Speak Like A CEO

Host: Codie Sanchez
Date: September 29, 2025

Episode Overview

In this value-packed solo episode, Codie Sanchez breaks down the essential communication skills that set top CEOs and 1% leaders apart. Codie delivers clear, actionable techniques for commanding respect, projecting competence, signaling warmth, and mastering the art of influence in any room. With practical examples, memorable quotes, and body language tips, she gives listeners the exact tactics to make their words carry weight—whether in meetings, negotiations, or tough conversations.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Start with the Headline

• Codie emphasizes that executives make their point upfront to frame conversations and instantly capture attention.
  • “Executives don't waste time on throat clearing or setting up a big runway before they get to the takeoff. By giving the headline first, you frame the conversation and make people lean in instead of tune out.” (01:20)
• Speaking decisively protects your ideas and positions you as a leader.
  • Formula: What’s wrong → Why it matters → How long you’ll need

2. Decisive Speech & Competence

• Use clear, direct statements with minimal hedging.
• Bad example: “Can I steal a few minutes? Is now a good time?”
• Good example: “I have a problem that is leading to missed revenue. Can we discuss no longer than five minutes?” (03:28)
• Leverage data and credentials—numbers make your words heavier and signal expertise.
  • “Data plus brevity signals confidence.” (11:05)

3. Warmth and Competence: The Two Levers

• “Respect is about how fast you can signal: ‘I’m a friend, and you can rely on me.’ That’s warmth and competence.” (06:00)
• Warmth cues: smiling, slow triple nod (people speak 67% longer), head tilt.
  • “The slow triple nod is a nonverbal way to say, ‘I hear you, I see you, tell me more.’” (06:38)
• Competence cues: confident posture, owning space, steepling fingers, hands visible.
  • “Occupying space shows certainty, credibility.” (08:31)

4. Gestures, Eyes, and Tone (“GET” Rule)

• Gestures: Use purposeful hand signals, like steepling fingers for self-assurance.
• Eyes: Briefly narrow them to show active thought and engagement.
• Tone: Lower, steady pitch signals competence. End sentences flat instead of “uptalk.”
  • “My tone is flat and a little bit lower than normal. That’s when I’m trying to be competent.” (14:50)

5. Master the Pause

• After a key point, pause—let silence add power and command the room.
  • “Pauses create gravity, they make your words echo longer and show you’re comfortable owning the room.” (17:09)
• Use gestures like a raised finger to non-verbally hold the floor.

6. Storytelling Over Stats

• Use narratives for persuasion: “We almost lost the company because of one bad hire” is more effective than quoting turnover percentages.
  • “Stories are sticky. Numbers slide off. CEOs weave both, but stories always lead.” (20:28)
• Combine stories, clear data, and specific actions for best results: “Show me, don’t tell me.”

7. Three-Point Rule & Frameworks

• Organize information in groups of three for memorability.
  • “The brain loves patterns, and we like patterns of three... Super easy and super powerful, so use it wisely.” (24:51)
• Use named and framed segments: e.g., “Let’s get to first principles,” “Foundational principles,” “Second and third order effects.”

8. Frame Control

• Reframe debates instead of direct disagreement.
  • “This isn’t about money; it’s about survival. Whoever controls the frame controls the debate.” (29:48)
• Avoid condescension or fake warmth; authenticity is critical.

9. Project Calm Certainty

• People follow calm, unshakable leaders.
  • “Be the duck gliding above water, even though underneath you are paddling like a crazy motherfucker.” (34:31)
• Do not display frustration by crying or losing emotional regulation in business.

10. Name the Elephant

• Call out the obvious issue everyone is avoiding to build credibility and resolve tension.
  • “Leaders earn respect by voicing uncomfortable truths. It makes people believe in you more than anyone else.” (36:13)
• Coordinate with allies in advance if needed to support your point.

11. Always End with a Command

• Conclude with clear next steps or decisions.
  • “Always finish with a clear action. Here’s what happens next.” (41:18)

12. Ask Dangerous Questions

• Provoke thought with sharp, risk-focused questions—not just small talk.
  • “What's the one risk that could kill this deal? Because real leaders don't just talk, they provoke thought.” (42:19)
• Don’t be afraid to say, “I don’t know,” but commit to finding the answer.

13. Warmth vs. Competence Audit

• Check your own communication balance by reviewing your emails for “warm” vs. “cold” (competent) words.
  • “The best leaders have both. They use warmth and competence like a scalpel, not a sledgehammer.” (46:40)
• Codie shares self-reflection: “I am high on competence, pretty low on warmth. I need to work on my warmth cues because people could be intimidated by me.” (48:00)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Speak in headlines. Start with the point, not the preamble.” (00:55)
• “Clear, direct statements, limited hedging, and using few qualifiers or apologies. That’s really signaling ‘I am competent.’” (02:11)
• “Smile, nod, or try the slow triple nod. People speak 67% longer when you do.” (06:42)
• “Show me, don't tell me.” (21:40)
• "Whoever controls the frame controls the debate." (30:05)
• “Be the duck gliding above the water, even though underneath, you are paddling like a crazy motherfucker.” (34:31)
• “Business does not allow for crying. You can hate me on the Internet for this, but your bank account will love me.” (36:59)
• “The top 1%... they prep more than the other 99% do.” (40:48)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:55 – Speak in headlines, command attention from the start
• 03:28 – Decisive speech examples and the “What–Why–How Long” formula
• 06:00 – Warmth vs. competence and key nonverbal signals
• 11:05 – Use numbers and brevity for authority
• 14:50 – Tone and vocal mastery; examples for women especially
• 17:09 – The power of pauses and silencing the room
• 20:28 – Persuasion through stories, not just stats
• 24:51 – Three-point rule and using frameworks for clarity
• 29:48 – Controlling the frame in conversations
• 34:31 – Projecting calm certainty during chaos
• 36:13 – Naming the elephant and voicing taboo truths
• 41:18 – Ending with commands to drive action
• 42:19 – The value of dangerous, revealing questions
• 46:40 – Email audit: balance your warmth and competence
• 48:00 – Codie’s personal reflection and the warmth-competence spectrum

Final Takeaways

• Top communicators aren’t born—they are made through preparation and practice.
• To speak like a CEO, start with clear, headline statements, display warmth and competence through both words and body, hold the conversational frame, master purposeful silence, tell stories, use memorable frameworks, and always move the conversation toward clear action.

“You are a BigDeal to us. Go practice these tactics—you’ll be shocked at the respect and results you command.”