Discipline Alone Can’t Make You Successful, Use THIS Instead… | Bryan Callen

Summary

BigDeal Podcast Episode Summary: “Discipline Alone Can’t Make You Successful, Use THIS Instead… | Bryan Callen”

Host: Codie Sanchez
Guest: Bryan Callen
Release Date: November 5, 2024

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Introduction

In this engaging episode of BigDeal, host Codie Sanchez sits down with seasoned actor and comedian Bryan Callen to delve deep into the nuances of success, humor, and personal growth. Their candid conversation, filled with laughter and profound insights, offers listeners a rare glimpse into Callen's multifaceted career and life philosophies.

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Comedy vs. Acting

Codie opens the discussion by highlighting Bryan's extensive background in both acting and comedy, mentioning his notable roles in films like The Hangover series and TV shows such as Mad TV. She expresses admiration for his transition into stand-up comedy and his upcoming Netflix special.

Bryan shares his perspective on why he shifted from acting to comedy, emphasizing the piecemeal nature of acting where one performs scene by scene. He humorously illustrates the repetitive and fragmented process of acting compared to the continuous flow of stand-up comedy.

Bryan Callen (04:09): “Humor is how we connect. If you think about humor, there's an intimacy to humor. It's a way of coping with the chaos and enormity of life.”

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Personal Struggles and Success

The conversation takes a heartfelt turn as Bryan recounts his tumultuous childhood, growing up across various countries during tumultuous times. His experiences with poverty and witnessing severe hardship instilled in him a deep sense of gratitude and resilience.

Bryan reflects on the notion that true success often stems from overcoming significant personal challenges. He cites philosophies from thinkers like Alan Watts and Nietzsche, stressing that adversity shapes individuals into strong, fulfilled human beings.

Bryan Callen (08:35): “If something really bad happened to you, just keep moving forward because it may be the best thing that ever happened to you.”

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Discussions on Society and Politics

Codie and Bryan delve into contemporary societal issues, exploring topics like the incel movement, changing dynamics in gender relationships, and the impact of social media on personal interactions. They critique the current political climate, particularly the polarization between men and women, and the challenges faced by young men in asserting themselves.

Bryan offers a comedian’s perspective on these issues, emphasizing the importance of humor as a tool for connection and coping. He argues that comedians can bridge gaps by addressing common human experiences through laughter.

Bryan Callen (39:50): “Men are terrified. This fourth wave feminism has gone from fighting for equal rights to saying men want to kill and rape you.”

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Relationships and Personal Life

The hosts discuss the dynamics of personal relationships, particularly the challenges of differing interests and communication styles between partners. Codie shares her strategies for maintaining harmony with her spouse by respecting each other's differing interests, while Bryan humorously describes his interactions with his wife and the importance of mutual respect and understanding.

Codie Sanchez (42:19): “We have this moratorium on dreams. I have to shut down the dream talk because it’s too much.”

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Making Money in Comedy

A significant portion of the discussion centers around the financial aspects of a career in comedy. Bryan explains that substantial income in comedy primarily comes from extensive touring rather than from special releases or ticket sales alone. He emphasizes the importance of building a strong touring ecosystem to generate substantial revenue.

Bryan also touches on the challenges comedians face in maintaining relevance and the hard work required to sustain a successful career. He compares the financial models of comedians to those in the music industry, where live performances are a primary income source.

Bryan Callen (57:00): “Comics that are big are making 20 to 30 million dollars a year on touring.”

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Final Thoughts and Conclusion

As the episode wraps up, Bryan shares his insights on what it means to be truly funny and happy, arguing that humor can coexist with personal happiness. He encourages aspiring comedians to delve into personal and philosophical questions to create meaningful and impactful comedy.

Codie and Bryan conclude with laughter, reflecting on the importance of humor in both personal growth and societal connection. Bryan teases his upcoming Netflix special and expresses enthusiasm for future projects, leaving listeners inspired and entertained.

Bryan Callen (66:03): “If you do it right and you keep moving forward, you will probably say much. I know you won't believe me now if you're going through it now, but you'll probably say, I wouldn't have changed it. It saved my soul.”

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Notable Quotes

• Bryan Callen (04:09): “Humor is how we connect. If you think about humor, there's an intimacy to humor. It's a way of coping with the chaos and enormity of life.”

• Bryan Callen (08:35): “If something really bad happened to you, just keep moving forward because it may be the best thing that ever happened to you.”

• Bryan Callen (39:50): “Men are terrified. This fourth wave feminism has gone from fighting for equal rights to saying men want to kill and rape you.”

• Bryan Callen (57:00): “Comics that are big are making 20 to 30 million dollars a year on touring.”

• Bryan Callen (66:03): “If you do it right and you keep moving forward, you will probably say much. I know you won't believe me now if you're going through it now, but you'll probably say, I wouldn't have changed it. It saved my soul.”

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Conclusion

This episode of BigDeal offers a rich blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and thought-provoking discussions. Bryan Callen's candidness about his life experiences and insights into the world of comedy provide valuable lessons on resilience, the power of humor, and the true meaning of success. Whether you're a fan of comedy, interested in personal development, or navigating societal changes, this conversation is both entertaining and enlightening.

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Connect with Bryan Callen:

• Website: bryancallan.com
• Instagram: @bryancallan

Don’t forget to subscribe to the BigDeal podcast for more unfiltered lessons from the smartest minds!

Transcript

[Cody Sanchez]

Hi. Welcome back to the Big Deal podcast. I'm Cody Sanchez, and this is for those of you who don't want to just be rich but free and do what it takes to get there. Okay? This week, Brian Callan. Oh, my fucking God. So good. I was on the floor laughing this entire podcast. Also learning things that I never expected to learn. If you don't know Brian, he has been an actor and a comedian for decades. You might have seen him in the Hangover one, the Hangover two, you know, ride along. He had mad tv. He is on Joe Rogan constantly. In fact, he left my podcast today and went to Joe Rogan afterwards. Brian is an incredibly skilled actor and comedian with a huge Netflix special that's going to be coming out soon. But I think one of the most interesting parts about this podcast today was listening to if you want to be funny, is there a way to actually do it? And I loved his answer on this. If you're a young man and you're not maybe getting as many chicks as you want or the attention that you want, could you use comedy to actually solve that? Three, do comedians make any money? And how. Same goes with actors. Four, what's going on right now with all of these politicians on these comedic platforms? What's happening? Why? And I think that answer sort of blew me away. And then finally, some kind of deep questions about how do you become a better human? How do you become a better parent, maybe, especially if you've got a little cash and you want your kid to be better than you were. And a wild story about what it actually takes to be really successful over time. And his answer surprised me. It's not going to be what you think. So, without further ado, let's get into Brian Callan and apologize for the hyena cackle of mine. You're going to hear often, although sometimes they call it a donkey bray. You could really take your pick. Let's get into Brian. Oh, wait. Also, you guys, if you haven't subscribed to the podcast, make sure you do. And this week we just went right into this bad boy. There's no, like, hi, Brian. Hi, Cody. Thank you for coming to the podcast. We just roll. So tell me if you like that this week, will you? You tell me in the YouTube comments and also let me know on the actual podcast. Okay, off we go. I love talking to my friends on this podcast about how they made their millions, how they became owners, how to solve their problems, and I love sharing these talks with you guys because I think that's how we get rich together. But when I can't meet in person to do this, there's one tool I use. Riverside. Riverside ensures I can talk to anyone, anywhere, record it in high resolution, and have a quality video that I can share. Riverside records separate audio and video tracks so we can easily cut back and forth between those inevitable, awkward interactions. But if you're not into detailed editing, Riverside's got your back. They have this in platform editing software that get. This is 99% accurate. And if that's not cool enough, they've got an AI platform where they can actually do show notes, summarize your content, add SEO required descriptions, and it's all programmatic so you can do what Riverside does and use it for interviews, presentations, podcasts, and more. I love it because I don't have time for complex. That's why we use this technology, because when I get a deal, you get a deal. If you guys want to use Riverside, go to the link in description and use the code Cody, and you get a deal, too. You got a thing for, like, dangerous animals. We've already talked about wolves here.

[Brian Callan]

It's all a gimmick. It's all born.

[Cody Sanchez]

Is that. Is that like a. Is that a Brian talent?

[Brian Callan]

We started with Rogan and I, back back in the day. He's obsessed with, like, you know, crocodiles and grizzlies and so. But, you know, it's just.

[Cody Sanchez]

But you're not.

[Brian Callan]

No, I mean, I like that. You know, it's. It's. I can talk to you about, like, who I think would win in a fight, a tiger or a grizzly. And it's ridiculous conversation.

[Cody Sanchez]

Is that.

[Brian Callan]

But I'll get into it.

[Cody Sanchez]

Like, you go to the data.

[Brian Callan]

The difference between Kobe and Jordan or Muhammad Ali and Mike Tyson. I can. I can pontificate and give you my useless opinion based on, you know, my guy energy.

[Cody Sanchez]

But. But people like it.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. They want to know, yeah, you're funny. Are people ever weird around you because you're funny? And so then they try to be funny. Like, I got a little nervous when you came over, and I'm like, I'm trying to tell a joke. I'm not funny naturally. Stop telling jokes.

[Brian Callan]

It's not true, though. It's like. It's like humor is. Are we rolling?

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

Humor is how we. If you think about humor, there's an intimacy to humor. Right. So typically, you can, a lot of times mark a lot of the great moments in your life with how much you are laughing with people. Yeah, that's Right. Especially your friends. And I think something about laughter is. It's a little bit like taking the whole chessboard and throwing it in the air. But by the way, don't underestimate how important it is to be able to laugh.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

A Kyle, a guy like me, if he's around somebody and they are connected and they're really laughing, that's incredibly. That's also amazing. That's a form of I'm having an effect on you and you're having an effect on me.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

So, you know. But yeah, a lot of people feel really insecure when they're around the comic. I can't be funny like you guys. He can. Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's got to be a normal interaction, right? Yeah, well, yeah, it's interesting. And probably it lessened once they're actually around you. Then they're just like, oh, okay. It's normal.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, yeah. And I don't think you can always be funny. My default is probably funny because it's a way of coping with the chaos and enormity of life. And maybe the fact that part of what's hard about life in some ways is you can do everything right, plan everything to the nth degree, and I promise you, most likely you will be derailed because it's just how it happens. And it's supposed to happen that way. But the way you can cope with that is to, you know, not take yourself or it too seriously.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, I totally agree.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. I'm like a big Alan Watts fan. Do you know Alan Watson Watts?

[Brian Callan]

He studied the Vedanta. You know, he. That's why he always said, I'm not a Christian, I'm not a Buddhist. Alan Watts was always somebody who talked about cultivating the Witness. Right. So you're not your mind, you're not your emotions, you're not your body. You are that observer, you know, and that sort of. So whatever happens to you, you can actually embrace. Don't resist it. You know, I love when he said something to the effect that you can't improve yourself or the world. That's a hard thing for especially Western people to hear because we have improved the world. We have manipulated our environment. But in fact, you know, if you were to come in and try to make everything right in this room and turn everything top side up, there'd be a top side down as well. And it's a beautiful way of doing it. Like, the part of you that wants to improve yourself is the one is the part that needs improving. So you're in the circle, you Know. Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

It's so true. Yeah. Do you ever listen to his. He has like these great little Spotify playlists where people put like lo fi beats to his stuff. That's how I know I'm like middle aged, I'm listening to like self help while I'm listening to music. That's what you thought. Great.

[Brian Callan]

You know, that's where you get to. I think that you start to realize that accomplishment and, you know, if you give whatever attention and status, what are the things you do? You know, when I was 53, I think 52, I. I drew a line through sort of everything that I had come to LA to do. It was kind of cool, right? I just went, I did this, you know, and. And you better be careful when you do that because it's not actually. When you get to the top of that wall, whatever it is that you set for yourself, you're going to realize that there's gotta be something more. You somehow need something to push against. If you take away what you have to push against. This is a bit trite, right? We've heard this a thousand times, but I just. I don't know, man. I think the reach is more important.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, well, it's kind of the same thing with money. People always go, nah, actually like happiness doesn't increase materially after about $500,000 a year in income. And when I was young and I heard that, I thought, I'm gonna fucking try. Like, let's just see. Like, let's see what happens. And then you do get. I don't know if I believe the $500,000 mark, actually. I think there's like a few more levels to the game, but. But like, you know, you can't hear it until you get there. And then you might be able to understand. I always like the Alan Watts thing where he's like, I don't know why it fucked me up so much, but remember when he talked about how he's like, think about life, like music or a song. Like, what if we listen to music and we were just like, oh, the point is, like to get to the end of that song. Like, we just wanted to get there as fast as possible. Then we'd go to a concert and the concert would just be like a cacophony of noises until like, as fast as possible it was done? That would be silly. That would be so silly. And he's like, that's how we are in life.

[Brian Callan]

He also said, if you were to achieve enlightenment, let's say you just were to achieve this thing, this elusive goal called enlightenment. You'd be right here, right here in the same place, nothing would change. That's an important concept too.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, it's true.

[Brian Callan]

So, you know, and I think that. I think about that a lot. You can make a lot of money. Good for you. I know people who've got a lot of money and you will buy a lot of safety and comfort. And I had this thing, it's part of what I'm writing about my special, which I'm going to shoot actually at Rogan's place in January. So you got to come by.

[Cody Sanchez]

Absolutely.

[Brian Callan]

And it's about. I don't think the Garden of Eden was paradise. I think the Garden of Eden was a form of hell, which is why there was an apple, which was why there was an escape portal, which was that snake and apple. Because I don't think you'd want to be in a garden where nothing could kill you, where nothing. The only reason you want to ride a motorcycle really fast is you might fall and lose all the skin on one side of your body. Sorry. The only reason you'd rather pet a tiger over a cow is the tiger might turn around and bite your face off. That's exciting, right? You know, everything is that way. And if you take away that struggle. So, you know, the idea that she bit the apple because she was a sinner, she would probably call it an escape. You know, get me the out of here. Because I, I need some. I need to not know what's around that corner. That's called adventure. And if you have no adventure, you have no fun. And so that, that's kind of. And, and, and if you make a lot of money, if you do it all right, and you, and you hit every, every marker for yourself. And I'm going to quote my friend who studies in Vedanta, he said you can hit every, every goal you set for yourself and ruin your kids lives. And to, to extrapolate on that. If your kids have never flown commercially, you're probably going to spend a lot of money on rehab later on. Ain't that the. Ain't that the bitch?

[Cody Sanchez]

Well, and also, you know, a lot of times these days you see these really successful, quote unquote, successful people and their kids are fucking nightmares. And you're like, how good of a human are you? If you had like sort of one real job in life, which was you brought this person in, like, that's kind of your fault one way or the other.

[Brian Callan]

It's so hard though.

[Cody Sanchez]

Do you have kids? This says from somebody who has zero kids.

[Brian Callan]

I have four kids. It's hard because it's the handicap of wealth. Right? You know, it's, it's, it's. I grew up. The way I grew up was My father was. Made some money, not a lot, but he was, he was a banker and other things. And. And I grew up all over the world. And I grew up in the 70s in the developing world. So I lived. I was born in the Philippines. I lived in India, in Calcutta and Bombay. I then moved to Lebanon and then Pakistan and then Lebanon again. And I was in the war. And then we were evacuated to Greece and then Saudi Arabia. Now in that time we also traveled to, I don't know, places like mainland China, all over Africa, most eastern East Africa, actually, I shouldn't say all over. And places like I said Yemen, but mainland China, Yemen, Africa, Syria, everywhere. I went everywhere.

[Cody Sanchez]

Only the 1970s.

[Brian Callan]

And what I saw. Yeah, and what I saw was real poverty. People who are on the losing side of history. But guess where I saw it from? From behind the pain of my. Of an air conditioned car. The glass of an air conditioned car. I was, I was, I was protected by the. These United States. I was an American citizen, a white kid with blonde hair. And I saw kids my own age begging. I saw when I was in Kenya, we were in the countryside and I gave somebody. I hated my lunch. We had these box lunches. We were on safari and I gave it and they tore it up. They fought over it. That's humiliating for me because what happens is you're so embarrassed by how lucky you are for no reason. You're so embarrassed by the fact that I knew, even as a kid, I was like, I've never had my belly empty. And I'm seeing real poverty, real. I saw leprosy. People your age have never seen full blown fucking leprosy in a marketplace in Damascus. I have. I saw that stuff with my own eyes. And when I say that, I'm talking about somebody with no nose and no fingers with advanced leprosy. I saw that. I walked by that in the bazaar. I saw people with elephantiasis because they didn't know what to do. So I saw these advanced diseases as a kid. I saw them. I smelled it. I was right next to it. And I saw. When you walk through a souk, when you walk through a bazaar in. Whether it's Pakistan or in. And I was very young or in Syria or when you're a very young kid and nobody gives you context, I remember being. I think I was 14. 14. I went to Russia when I was 18, and I was with my friend who spoke Russian. We were in Gorky park, and this is when it was a communist country. Everything was monitored. But I stole away. I hooked up with this beautiful girl named Svetlana. I'll never forget. It was so awesome.

[Cody Sanchez]

I was 18.

[Brian Callan]

Her and her friend at 18. I'm not kidding. And, like, her and her friend Cristina. And my friend was like, oh. He was all like, ooh. I was like. They were like, 21. They're probably cosmos Hotel.

[Cody Sanchez]

Russian agents.

[Brian Callan]

Crazy story. I don't. Whatever put me in Siberia, bro, it was the greatest. 18 years old. I was like. It was incredible. But. But I remember being in Gorky park with these Russians. They were asking me in Russian. My friend was able to interpret. They were asking me what kind of cars there were. I gave the kid my Nikes and my blue jeans, and they were like. They couldn't believe it. Like, it was like currency. The same thing with mainland China. When I was there in 1981, I was 14, I think. And I remember everyone was in a blue. Blue pants and blue shirts, and they had the same haircut, and they were all on bicycles. Because with Mao and the communists, they wanted to get rid of category. Right? I saw that stuff. And so, again, you know, you get to go back to the United States. You get to go back to wherever you are. We are safe. We have representative government. We don't have to worry about a knock on the door. You never have to worry about where your food's coming from.

[Cody Sanchez]

You.

[Brian Callan]

You never have to. Most importantly, see how humiliating it is for your mother, your father, to not be able to feed you and the family to not be able to kind of like, even speak their mind. I never had that. My father was my hero because he was an American, and he was able to say whatever he wanted, and he had money, and he was able to. It's like this. The best way to put it is this. I grew up in a part of the world where you had to forego who you could be for who you had to be. And I'm quoting Daryl Cooper now, because he said that in a podcast. I listened to it, so I don't want to take credit for it, but I thought about that a lot, and that really. That creates a lot of guilt in you and a lot of shame, you know, is that it should probably. I don't know where we were going with this, but you were talking about.

[Cody Sanchez]

Well, it's interesting because I sometimes think that Maybe the reason why we had that whole white privilege movement where we were shaming children for being white and Americans. Yeah, I think it's really pernicious.

[Brian Callan]

White people are not privileged.

[Cody Sanchez]

Exactly. But I think that it was a little bit based on some of the people had these ideas. They're like, well, I've lived this way. I've never had hardship and I don't know, I'd be curious. Your take. Part of my thought there is like, I don't know, instead of being guilty and shameful, why don't you do fucking something with what you got? Like, did you.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, that's how I did what I did. I've never. Yeah, I mean. No, no, no, listen, what I did is, I. What's good about having historical perspective and perspective in general is you go, I'm lucky. I get to. I get to make a living with my imagination. I get. I get to do something called original self expression and make money.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

I mean, what are you talking. And I'm not going to do that. That's why I work so hard. That's why, like, I don't want to die thinking I didn't mind everything I could. This next special. The best fucking thing I've ever done in my life. The best. And. And I can't wait. But it better be. It better be.

[Cody Sanchez]

You know, you actually have a wild, like, thought I've seen a couple different times. That's super counterculture, which is you don't like discipline. You prefer inspiration.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

Explain. Like, what does that mean? And how does. How do you actually use that?

[Brian Callan]

I don't think discipline is sustainable. I mean, I know it's sustainable. If you're a Navy SEAL and you have to deal with being uncomfortable for a long period of time, nobody can sustain that. Ultimately, every time I meet somebody who's really intense, I see these fucking sales guys. This guy, this guy, I don't care. His name is Base. He's like, he's jacked and he's. And he's all the supplements. I'm jealous of his body. But he's like, I don't get tired. I do not get tired. I'm like, hey, bro, this Adderall is kicking in right now. I get it, but good luck with that. Like, stop it and shut the fuck. Shut up. Shut up. You know, like, you can't do that. It's good. If you're a young man and you want to get off your ass and come up with a game plan, cool. But once that caffeine rush or adderall wears down. You're going to have to. You know, success is consistency over a long period of time. And you better be inspired. You better get to why you're doing it.

[Cody Sanchez]

Why. How do you. How do you get inspired? Like, what does that look like for you?

[Brian Callan]

I am. I've always been interested in potential. Right. So I want to know. I love the idea of you don't know what you're capable of.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

You know, I use this expression, which is, your best self is clearing his throat in the other room. Right. You're. You're fucking up over here, but, you know, you should be doing something else because you could be so much better over there. You have perfect teeth, by the way.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, thanks.

[Brian Callan]

Really sorry to put you on the.

[Cody Sanchez]

Spot, but, yeah, I love a compliment. You never have to apologize for that.

[Brian Callan]

But, you know, that's kind of like, that should be for all of us. Like, who are you? Who are you really supposed to be? Right? When God. When you get up to heaven or wherever it is, and God's got your entire life on a piece of paper, like, looking at you with that same expression your dad used to have when you get your report card, right? I want him to be looking at me going, hey, you did your best, you know. You know, you did. You did a good job. Or, hey, you reached, you know, I grade on a curve. Come on in.

[Cody Sanchez]

There's so funny you say that because I am obsessed with this Emma Bombeck quote. Have you ever heard it? It's when I stand before God at the end of my days, I hope that I can say to him, I have not one drop left. I used everything you gave me and that for me. Now, she was kind of a crazy feminist person, but she. I think the quote totally, you know, a lot of times, like you, for example. I mean, God, I was looking at your resume. It's wild. It's like you've acted in all these huge movies, like, you know, Hangover, Hangover 2, you know, Ride Along. You've done all these incredible TV shows. You know, you've done the full gamut of, like, acting. And then you decided to get into comedy, which I want to talk about, too. But a lot of people will probably say, like, all right, you could have been good. You made plenty of money. It doesn't happen as much in Hollywood. I feel like people just keep going. A lot of times when you make money, they go, why don't you just, like, why do you need more?

[Brian Callan]

Nobody makes money. I love this. Most people think that actors are you know, set.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

And my favorite. Like, I could tell you, you have. You would be so blown away.

[Cody Sanchez]

Okay, tell me at.

[Brian Callan]

How many household names have don't have on less than a million dollars in the bank?

[Cody Sanchez]

Speaking of making money, if you guys haven't picked up the book Main Street Millionaire that I'm pointing to right over here, you definitely should. This book is all about how do you get ownership, which I think is the key to all money. It's not really about, do you want to just only go buy a business? It's how do you become a deal maker, and how do you become an owner? Because that is how you get rich. If you already have a business, you should buy it so that you can figure out how to integrate more businesses into your business. If you have a salary, you should buy it so you can figure out how to actually negotiate upside. And if you want to understand what's going on in our world today with the big guys owning everything and us begging for scraps, you should buy it in order to read it, too. You guys get a bunch of free downloads with it. If you do this before the book comes out, so get there soon. Msmbook.com it would blow your mind.

[Brian Callan]

You'd be like, what? Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

Also could. I think there couldn't be anything worse than being famous and poor.

[Brian Callan]

There are plenty of them out there.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's tough.

[Brian Callan]

There are plenty of them out.

[Cody Sanchez]

So what actually made you go from acting to comedy? Because now Netflix special. You. You're on tour right now.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah. What's change? I just loved. I. I mean, you know, I've never been on set where I didn't want it to be over. It's a terrible thing to say, really. It's acting as, like, piecemeal. It's just piecemeal, man.

[Cody Sanchez]

Like, lay it out. Like, what does it look like?

[Brian Callan]

You're doing it a page at a time. So watch this. Watch this. I'm gonna do a scene. Ready? Let's do a scene. All right, action. You gotta give me my money, my friend, or we're gonna have a problem. Cut. Brian, can you. When you bring the coffee, you're blocking the light. Can we get a different light over here? Because he brought the coffee. Just. Can you bring it down and then swoop it up? Yeah, I got it. Okay, action. We got a problem, my friend. Looks like you owe me some money. Okay, Brad, cut. Don't say it into. Because the mic it's getting you set it into the coffee. Could you say it. Say it this way, and then Try to. Then take a sip. It's important to take the sip because we want you to savor it. But there's a little alcohol and. Fuck it. That's all day.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's so beautiful.

[Brian Callan]

That's all day. There's a shadow on her face, and also her hair is different. You see how it's doing this? Can we. Yeah, come on in. That's what you do all day. I'm not kidding.

[Cody Sanchez]

That sounds terrible.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah. That's why actors drink.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

It's like, get me the out of here.

[Cody Sanchez]

Why do you think so many people like it, then?

[Brian Callan]

Because it's so hard to get there.

[Cody Sanchez]

You're like, I tried so hard. And then once you're there, it's miserable where you.

[Brian Callan]

Well, it's not only hard to get there, it's hard to sustain. It's hard to stay relevant. Like, I think Jay Leno said, like, no one. No one is in first chair for more than six years.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's such a great point. Yeah. Especially women. I think we're like, two and a half.

[Brian Callan]

Oh, my God. Once you lose your delicious. It's awful.

[Cody Sanchez]

I'm way past that.

[Brian Callan]

Katharine Hepburn talked about that. They all talked about that. You win an Oscar, they don't even. It's adorable.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, exactly.

[Brian Callan]

Where's the next young.

[Cody Sanchez]

You know, and there's so many beautiful women, especially today. Like, maybe it used to be enough if you were. Yeah, true. Yeah. That's super. Okay, so you went into comedy and didn't. I think I heard you talk about how Joe Rogan was one of the people that was like, hey, get into comedy.

[Brian Callan]

Do stand up. I had been doing standup, but then I was acting, and I wanted to be Robert De Niro. Or I wanted to be. I don't know who I wanted to be.

[Cody Sanchez]

Interesting.

[Brian Callan]

I loved that. I was pretty good at it. Like, I did a lot of theater, and I loved it. And, you know, and I worked really hard at acting. Like, I was in class for years and really doing plays and theater and working on scenes.

[Cody Sanchez]

And I'm just picturing you, like, dancing. So, like.

[Brian Callan]

And I took your leap, and I took voice and all that horseshit. Yes. I went to formal theater school in New York City.

[Cody Sanchez]

I don't know why.

[Brian Callan]

Violent. Well, I'm a thespian. You understand. This is the reason I speak this way. I drop my jaw and I'm really good at expressing myself.

[Cody Sanchez]

You can't.

[Brian Callan]

And that's how you used to speak. It was called the Skinner technique. Of course. And you weren't English. But you ever listened to William F. Buckley or Katherine Hepburn? There's something about them that's almost English, right? That.

[Cody Sanchez]

Well, Alan Watts. Is Alan Watts English? He talks English. Oh, well, he was actually real. Okay.

[Brian Callan]

He was William F. Barkley, of course, spoke this way. I mean, if I were to take. If I would actually romance your argument in the real world, which I would never do, but I will hear for sake of. I suppose, the cameras, it's like, oh, dude, you're, you're. But that was that. You know. Who talks that way? Ann Coulter. She still has a little bit of a. Because the British, the British, you know, if you came over the Mayflower or. That was very stiff. It's very British also, you know what.

[Cody Sanchez]

I've noticed, which I probably would get in trouble for. But now we're doing like a few things. We just signed with an agency and for like a book tour and stuff, like nothing fun or real. But why do all Hollywood agents sound the same? Even if they're like from Jersey or Florida, there's like a Hollywood agent voice. Have you heard that? I'm not going to try it because I'm terrible at accents. But you know what I'm talking about. Like, they all kind of have like a weird.

[Brian Callan]

It's probably because they're all originally from New York or they used to be.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, you think that's why now they're from la?

[Brian Callan]

But, but, but typically, typically in, in, in. Remember, remember, Hollywood was a Jewish invention. Okay. You know, when people are anti Semitic, I'm always like, all right, that's cool. But you do know that improv stand up even to a large extent. But certainly improv and certainly Hollywood, like movies. It was created and founded by really European East. East European Jewish refugees.

[Cody Sanchez]

I didn't know.

[Brian Callan]

So was the whole garment industry.

[Cody Sanchez]

You didn't knew that.

[Brian Callan]

Right. So there were certain things. So when you were an agent, you were typically like, you were a bit of a rebel. Your mother, if you were probably from Brooklyn and your mother said, you're going to be, you know, you're going to either have your own business, you're going to join your uncle or your father's business, you're going to take it to the next level. You're going to be a lawyer or you're going to be a doctor. There's no. You're not going to be a cop, you're not Irish, you're not going to put your money in a mattress. You're not Italian. We're going to put it into a Business. And a lot of the Jewish refugees could sew. They were garmentos, so that's why they came to New York. But larger point is that if you were a bit of a black sheep, you went to Hollywood, tried to be an actor, played an Italian gangster.

[Cody Sanchez]

Wow.

[Brian Callan]

You were a producer. When you realized the acting wasn't where the money was or it was hard to do, you're like, maybe I can put people together. Or you became an agent. Right. But certainly a lot of the great comics, you know, all that, Sid Caesar and Rob Reiner, why were they comics? Because in that culture, in the Jewish culture of New York, kids were indulged. If you're British and you're of the aristocracy, you're seen and not heard 100%. When you're a Jewish kid in the Lower east side and your whole family's crammed into a tenement, you're there and your voice is as loud as any adult's. You can talk back to your parents. You can make everybody laugh. That was the Marx Brothers. So the larger point I'm making is that traditionally, the agents that were all in Hollywood were Jew, they were Jewish, and they all came from kind of the same part of New York, same ecosystem. So, you know. Yeah, like Robert Evans. They spoke a certain way.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. They've got a vibe.

[Brian Callan]

There was just a way. It's just business. What do you know? There was a. There was a way of doing business. There was a language, and it was really mostly New York. People are always shocked with Donald Trump, with the way he insults people or the way he's politically incorrect with his words. That's fucking New York. That's. That's construction site New York. It's a hot. It doesn't matter that he was a blue blood. He's also Irish and with German, so he wasn't necessarily like that British thing. His dad got his hands dirty.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, yeah. I mean, if you. I was joking with Tanner the other day, our creative director. Like, thank God we're in the era that we're in now. Maybe it helps that I'm a woman and I'm Latina. That's like a double check box.

[Brian Callan]

But.

[Cody Sanchez]

But, yeah, I'm white presenting. You know, but the. It's helpful.

[Brian Callan]

I present. I present female.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

And white.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yes, exactly. If I could do an accent, I would do that. But, you know, the stuff that we even say here, because we run a bunch of Laundromats and car washes and, you know, roofing companies, so half the time I'm like, oh, you Know I'm not supposed to say that anymore. If that was on the Internet, I'd be in a lot of trouble. Which kind of, like, actually makes me think about. So the other day, you can be my therapist. The other day I gave a speech like, doesn't matter, you know, to a. What? Not a small. A couple thousand people. But I fucking bombed. It was like, I've never done that before. I did a really bad job. I was like, over time, I don't even know what happened. And, like, there was no reason really. And, like, what's interesting is, like, it didn't matter. Like, I wasn't gonna die. Nothing mattered. And. But the reaction that I had from it was totally unreasonable. I was like, fuck. That was terrifying and awful and the worst thing ever. But have you, like, had that happen with jokes and stand up?

[Brian Callan]

I haven't. Cody, I'm really good.

[Cody Sanchez]

You've never bombed ever. And did it feel awful?

[Brian Callan]

Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

And does it still.

[Brian Callan]

I mean, I've been doing it so long that I got my bag of tricks right. It's not gonna.

[Cody Sanchez]

So now you pull a rabbit out of it.

[Brian Callan]

It's not gonna. Yeah, it's. I'm not gon to ever do an hour where. Yeah, you're not gonna laugh.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

Where's my camera? That was. That was obnoxious. Let me rephrase that. What I meant is that I'm never going to do an hour where you're not gonna laugh.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

Hard. Really hard. Is that my camera?

[Cody Sanchez]

That should be your special clip. Actually, we should. We should cut that. I want to do a video for you and do a little Instagram reel for your special, and I think that'll be really good. But in the beginning, like, do you remember the first time you really.

[Brian Callan]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's so terrifying. I don't know if anybody. This is how you equate it. If you ever been in a real fight, like, where you don't know who the guy is in front of you, you're going to be like, you can't feel your legs. I don't care how much you train. I mean, maybe if you're, like, inoculated stressed, if you're a regular dude like me and you got to fight, you can't feel your legs. You just know. I'm like, I'll put my weight on my back foot and I guess, here we go, you know, good luck. It sucks. It's. It's the same thing. I remember feeling that. I remember feeling that. I was like, I feel Like, I'm. I'm about to have a real fight with somebody. I don't know.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

I don't know. He's gonna kill me. I don't know who he is. You know, I don't know if you know what I mean. Yeah. Feeling of. And then. And then you do it long enough, and that just completely goes away.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

Like, I. When I shoot my special, I won't be. I promise I won't be a little bit nervous.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

I'm just interested in hitting every mark, I suppose, hitting every beat.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. Well, then you get.

[Brian Callan]

Well, I want to say what I want to say, and I want to be thematic about it. Right. Not that anybody will watch it through, because we don't. We all have TikTok brain now.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yep.

[Brian Callan]

You know, but for me, I want to. That's my diary of what I think is important, what I'm interested in, you know?

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. And it's almost like you can't bomb hard enough for the audience at a certain point because you got a base level that's quite good, but for yourself, you're just competing against yourself.

[Brian Callan]

What I would say to you, though, maybe the way to avoid that in the future is to really dial down on what you're saying. Sometimes when we're not quite sure, we get into this gray area, and it feels like I didn't see the speech, but it feels like when that happens, just take a look at whether or not you've really carved down to its essence, what you're trying to say. What is your philosophy? What are your principles behind business, if that's what you're talking about? What are the mistakes people make, you know? And what are the shortcuts you can give people so they don't have to make the same mistakes? I always say I'm older, Right. So the reason you should listen to me is not because I'm smarter. I'm really not. I'm not. I'm not. But I have made more mistakes than you have, and I've wasted more time chasing the wrong shit. So, you know, I might. I might be able to recognize when you're heading for a wall. And if I tell you to turn the wheel a little bit, just listen to me. I'm. I'm an old guy.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. I don't think we actually have enough older people around us as young people to get feedback.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah. Experience is.

[Cody Sanchez]

Because comics you guys do, that's like a thing, you know, you kind of.

[Brian Callan]

It's not really sort of it is.

[Cody Sanchez]

But it's not what do you mean.

[Brian Callan]

Is there's an irreverence to comedy. There's not a community as much. It's more of a, it's more of a, it's really a solo thing. You know, it's like I remember when Rogan was and I went hunting the first time we ever did Meat Eater. And I just, you know, he was like, hey, this is tough. We're representing the comedy community. And I, and I said, yeah, you know that tight knit bunch. And he started laughing really hard. Cause it's true. It's like we're all hopelessly individualistic and just a bunch of misfits.

[Cody Sanchez]

Actually, that makes me good people.

[Brian Callan]

But I'm just saying.

[Cody Sanchez]

Well, it's funny you say that because I was looking at a study yesterday about how there's a study in Japan where people who laughed more frequently not only lived longer by like significantly longer, like 20 to 30% longer than their other peer group. And this was a long form study over a series of decades, but also had a decrease in disability. So less Alzheimer's, less even macular degeneration, so losing of your eyesight. And I thought that was really interesting. Like laughing's good for you. I think we all kind of know that. Yeah, but specifically laughter could have even been individual where you watch something and laughed and. But what I thought was also interesting is then you have the flip side, which is there seems to be no increase in happiness for telling jokes, only for hearing them.

[Brian Callan]

Oh, that makes total sense.

[Cody Sanchez]

Right?

[Brian Callan]

Because when you're telling jokes. Well, that's why comics are miserable. I'm not. Yeah, but, but a lot of comics are. I mean, because remember there's a famous actor I won't go into because I'm a fan, but he saw me at a party and it was. And I'd met him before, but he wanted to talk to me because I was a comic. It was kind of cool, right. And I was dating my now wife and it was cool to have this very famous person kind of like approach me and blah, blah. And then what I realized is that, oh, he was using me as essentially an excuse to perform. And I went, yeah. And I do that. So we all have this. When you're a performer, you have this unflattering shadow side which is, look at me, I want all the attention. I'm a vacuum cleaner. I have a lot of that in me. A lot of that in me. And it's not a very admirable trait. And it certainly doesn't make you happy. It doesn't make you more happy when you're looking to be the center of the world. But you can replace that. You can replace that with trying to be, for lack of a better word, an artist. And what does that mean again? Doing something original that no one has seen. Surprising yourself. And that's what I do now. And so then your comedy goes from being. I'm not saying I'd do this, but certainly the idea would be, I'm of service, Let me do something to make you laugh. And that feels good, man. That feels good. You're connecting with people and you're making them laugh, and you're doing it because you can. And as a result, it's because you should. I was put on this earth not to invent, you know, rockets, but to be a jackass and get you to forget about your life for a little bit.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. Do you think you can be really funny and be happy? It seems like a lot of comedians are dark and twisted.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah. Yeah. But I don't know. You know, I think Rogan's very happy. I think a lot of people have, you know, it just depends on your personality trait. Maybe. Maybe a better way is that when you are a dark person, there's very little open to you, but you cope with just trying to be funny about this brutal thing called life. You were born, you know, a lot of times shorter than other guys, weaker than other guys, not as athletic in any way. You never had any victories. You never had women like you. These are. These are traumatic things for men to go through when you're an adolescent and stuff. But, but, but, but you're funny, right? You're funny. And. And now you get, like, the cool kids think you're great and that you get addicted to that because you're accepted. So that's where a lot of comedy comes from. For me, I think comedy came from being moved constantly. I was always thrown into a whole different set of kids. I, you know, hey, we're moving to Saudi Arabia, but I have a dog. I've been here for two years. I got. Yeah, now you'll figure it out. We're moving to Lebanon. I know, but I have another dog here, and I have a snake. What are we going to do? We'll find a home. Yeah, right. What the fuck? All right. See you later, everybody. You know, there's no email. Bye.

[Cody Sanchez]

Bye.

[Brian Callan]

You know, so, yeah, and here's a new group of kids in the middle of the school year. And I learned very quickly that don't be the last guy picked on the team. Be A little bit lucky I was coordinated enough to be, you know, not a. Not a hindrance on a sports team. And also I was. But. But I was. I was. I got good at making people laugh quickly, and I got really good at reading what people were ashamed of and what they were proud of. That's my. That was my superpower, my communication super power, if I may, is I was really good at figuring out what people were ashamed of. We all have a side of us that we hide totally. And that's how we're proud of. And I think if you want to get to. If you want to. If you want people to like you, and if you want people to feel comfortable and you help them hide what they're ashamed of, but you accentuate and you highlight and you speak out what it is they're proud of. And we're all that way as human beings.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's so good. You know, it's funny because it's true. Like, we have this. We have this incel movement in the US Now. We have. God, I read a study the other day that we have 55% more single women from 2000 to 2023. And then, of course, it makes sense, sort of what's happening even politically in our country, because they vote predominantly Democrat, and men increasingly of their age vote conservative or Republican. And the women increasingly don't want to actually date those who have this different perspective, which is very silly to me. But what I think is really interesting is this incel movement is a lot about Tinder. I mean, I'm friends with Sean Ratt. I like him a lot, the guy who created Tinder. But we were talking the other day, I'm like, fuck, man. I mean, the app is inherently swipe, swipe, visual, visual. And like, what have you done?

[Brian Callan]

You know, but that you're not over six feet.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

You know, there's all these weird things. So 10% or 5% of the men get all the girls. Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

It's bizarre. And so I think actually it'd be really interesting to have more of, like, a comedian's perspective on for young men. Like, yeah, okay, you're not rich. You're not maybe smarter than everybody else. You're not better looking, but fuck me, if you can make somebody laugh, we show one, you can make them live longer, two, it makes them happier, and three, I bet a lot more chicks like you.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah. But you know what? Men are terrified. This fourth wave feminism has gone from fighting for equal rights to saying men want to kill and rape you. And so that's and with social media, a woman can say anything. And I know so many young, my relatives who are living in a world where they're very aware that they could do something in college and somebody doesn't have a good experience with them sexually or intimately. And 10 years later, 15 years later, 20 years later, they say X, Y, and Z. They get a story. What do you get? A statement. But you're done. You're done. And they're very aware of that. So there's a lot of that, too. There's. There has. Men, women have been pitted against each other in this. It was always. And already adversarial in the United States. It was always adversarial. It was always like there was this thing where boys and girls separate almost voluntarily at 6 years old, and they don't really come together until college. So when you're in college, all of a sudden now you're living with a girl, a woman or a girl, and you're a boy or you're a man, but typically, as a boy and a girl and you're living with somebody and you've been around guys your whole life, and she has a different consideration, and you think she's crazy, and she thinks you're insensitive, and it's like. And you have no. There's no mechanism, there's no bridge in which to work it out. You can go to a therapist, but then she's gonna be a fucking therapist. Guys aren't taught that. What do you mean, a therapist? Stop being crazy. Oh, that's helpful, right? You're not given those tools. And I remember my girlfriend fell asleep during Raging Bull, my favorite movie, and I was like, so outraged. How the fuck do you fall asleep in the Greatest Movie? I broke up with her. I was like, she can't appreciate Raging Bull. Hey, dumbass. Dumbass. Now, of course, at 57, my wife is watching. And my wife's smart and great, and I love her, but she's my favorite person. But she's watching Love is Blind and can't get enough of it.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, yeah.

[Brian Callan]

And is getting all involved. I'm like, ah, Jesus. You know, I can't watch one minute of that shit. Is that. God? But it's just what she's interested in. I'm interested in stats when it comes to fighting or, you know, in UFC or in. I don't know, in football.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

Which is different, man.

[Cody Sanchez]

Totally different. Yeah. I think one of the things that saved Chris and my marriage is we've sort of allowed each other to not give A fuck about what the other person's talking about. And so if at a certain point he's telling me a story that I literally couldn't care less, then I just go, yeah, so weird. Like, the first episode of Gossip Girl really got me because she was wearing. And so. And then he'll do the opposite to me. Like I was cleaning the. The Glock and what happened is the hammer pull. And I was like, fucking don't care. Fine. Okay. And we just have a little joke, because it doesn't mean I don't love you. I just literally couldn't care less about that thing you're talking about. Which should be fine, by the way.

[Brian Callan]

Thank God.

[Cody Sanchez]

Thank God. Yeah. Because also, I mean, I love hanging out with my person. And it sounds like you do too, but you gotta also, like, have some girl time. Have some dude time.

[Brian Callan]

Well, my wife will tell me about her dream. Now if I did that with a buddy of mine, he'd be like, hey, bro, hey, is this a dream you're telling me about? And you know, like the other day she was telling me a story and I'm not listening. And she's like. And then she's going on. I'm like, yeah, and I'm trying to do something else. And then this like, ship comes down and I go, hey, are you telling me about a dream? Like I like, you tell me about. I'm trying to. And she goes, yeah. I go, I'm not listening to you about a dream. Nothing happened. It's a dream. What do you mean, a shit guy? I'm fucking trying to do something. I'm paying bills. Like, how dare you take 20 minutes of my day.

[Cody Sanchez]

To be fair, to be fair, I have a friend shout out Shayna. She always tells me about her dreams. I also don't care about the dream. I think we need a moratorium on dreams.

[Brian Callan]

You present mail.

[Cody Sanchez]

I know, damn it. I know.

[Brian Callan]

You don't. You don't.

[Cody Sanchez]

But I think. Yeah, no, I think we've gotten too into talking about ourselves sometimes. Not that Shayna does that, but the dream thing is funny. Okay, I want to talk about one other thing. Like, that's a little bit about this. You know, we were talking about it when we were first, like, gonna do the pod. Today is a weird week, right? We've got like, we got Trump on Rogan. We've got you on Rogan next. Today we had. I watched Tucker Carlson have Rob Schneider come out before him.

[Brian Callan]

I love Rob Schneider.

[Cody Sanchez]

Uh huh. And then I saw Andrew Schultz had Trump. Like, what is going on with comedians and, like, are they the new voice of reason? When did this happen? You've been in this game a long time and know a bunch of these guys. It's kind of. I never would have predicted this, like, 10 years ago.

[Brian Callan]

Well, Trump has a young son, Barron, and Barron's very keyed into what's cool. And Barron is a guy who's looking at his dad going, hey, dad, you want to get young people? Get on Theo Vaughn. Yeah, that was get on. Get on. You know, get on Joe Rogan, get on all the podcasts I listen to. And that's what's going on is. And to Trump's credit, and, you know, he's. He, he's. He kind of. He's comfortable among the bros. And you can say what you want about bro comics and bro podcasts, but that's, that's what men are listening to. And they're listening to it because it's. First of all, it's also long form. So when you hear Trump talk for three hours or Bernie Sanders talk for three hours or whoever it might be for three hours, you not only get a very different perspective on who this person is, because you will settle. You can't sell for three hours. You end up settling into who you really are, and that's a very, very different and new thing. And so your celebrity and your shine is no good here, my friend. And it used to be forever that when we saw a celebrity, whoever it was, they were on Johnny Carson or Conan O'Brien or Jay Leno for five minutes, and the questions were prepared. And you can be mysterious. You can be Johnny Depp and answer very few questions and dress like a pirate. And we were like, he's so cool. And Hollywood was a mystery, and everything was a mystery. And how they keep their bodies that way was a mystery. And then along comes, you know, the Internet and cameras everywhere, and all of that, all that facade goes away. All of a sudden, all that sheen, and you got a guy like Rogan who is not selling you anything. He's just talking, and he's not interviewing you. He's just having a conversation with you. And we get a sense of who you really are when you're just sitting around. And I think it's very telling that Kamala Harris wasn't willing to do. And I understand she thinks it's hostile territory. And I. And it is. And I understand that she's. She feels like she's probably walking into a no win situation because Rogan's going to ask you Questions. And he's going to. And he's going to be Rogan.

[Cody Sanchez]

And he's good and he's smart and.

[Brian Callan]

And she's just not comfortable there.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

And, and. But I think it was a mistake because if she had, if she had. If she, if she had sat down for three hours and spoken from the heart and really told us what she thinks. Really told us what she really thinks about the border, what she really thinks about the economy, what she really thinks about fracking, what she really thinks about taxes. How much of the federal government should you be working for every day? What percentage? What percentage? 50%. Is that fair? How many people, you know, 1% of the population pays over 50% of the taxes, right? Something like that. 10% pays 90%. You know, I'd like to hear these conversations. But you're still trying to sell a concept like Joy to the American people. Is that what you're trying to do? You think we're that dumb? Is that what you're doing, Oprah? When Oprah's like, joy, you know, I really, I really want to. I really want to be like, you're better than that. You're lying to us. And it's not about Trump or Kamala Harris, but you're not being respectful, which is another way of saying you're not representing us because you don't think we're worth it. And more importantly, you think we're dumb. The average American, and I am an average American, I'm a capitalist. I have a business. If I don't put butts in my seats when I go out and do standup, I got a problem. I got a problem. Real problem. I pay for it, okay? And most of us, as Americans, can't. We pay. We pay a price for being wrong. If I miscalculate. If I have a business, I pay a real price. So I live in a world of objective reality. And when you don't, and when you start talking to me about concepts like Joy, when you start talking to me about the problem in the United States is that we're racist and transphobic and homophobic. When you say that, somebody trying to run a business or trying to put their kids through school or just trying to make enough money so their kids can do the after school baseball program, all of us go, I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know where you live because you live in an area code I can't afford anyway, you don't pay a price for being wrong. You make your living with your Mouth by talking. And I'm up early, man. And I don't see this, I don't see that. America 100%. I'm trying to get food out on the table for my customers and I don't care if you're. What do you mean? Gender neutral bathrooms. What are you talking about? I don't even think about that stuff. I have no idea what you're talking about. I've been going to my daughter's, baseball, I mean my daughter's, you know, lacrosse games or tennis games, whatever the fuck the sport is. I've been going to her games ever since she was seven years old, trying to get her a scholarship because I can afford it. And you want to put men in there? You want to put biological men who can come in and shatter records and get those scholarships? You want to do that to me after I've been a mom and I've taken my kids to all the. Fuck you. Fuck you. You're not American. You're not even a real human being. You're talking to me from some you philosopher kings. You're talking to me from the beltway. You're talking to me from Silicon Valley. I don't even know who you are, man. I don't even know who you are. You have so much money, it's ridiculous. So is it a wonder, Is it a wonder that most of us are a little bit suspicious, a little bit. Feel a little bit unrepresented by that machine over there called the left wing? It has nothing to do. It's not saying that Democrats, traditional Democrats don't have something to offer. It doesn't mean I'm fucking a far right guy. I'm not. It just means I'd like a little objective reality here, man.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's so true. Well, I think that's one of the problems with getting too much cash is, you know, I think that it's wrong that we don't talk about money. I think we got to talk about money more because money is really just one thing. It's just I get to assert my will more on you and you get to assert it less on me. The more I have on it, the more I push back on the world and I create my own reality with this green piece of paper.

[Brian Callan]

That's a great way to put it.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's it. That's it. And for some reason, as we get richer, we don't talk about money anymore. Not okay to talk about money anymore. In fact, it's like scammy and lowbrow and whatever. No it's fucking not. You think it's that way because if you, if you can get people to believe that we shouldn't share the only thing that actually creates a protective measure of freedom, then we have less of it, which is where we're at today. And so I remember when I first got on the Internet, I was like, fuck, I don't, you know, after you make some money, you don't really want to talk about it. I mean, Hollywood's a perfect example. Nobody ever talks about money in Hollywood. They don't talk about how much they make. They don't talk about what they are most of the time, actually. They just try to make themselves look normal again. They're just like, remember back when I stole candy bars? You're like, you haven't eaten a Candy Bar in 37 years. Like you did. That's not even a real thing anymore. And that's okay that it's not real. It's awesome that you transcended this somehow. But like, I never really liked that. Which kind of.

[Brian Callan]

But the American Republic's really cool and very unique in the sense that we, you can grow rich and you can show it off. You know, when Donald Trump said, yeah, they said, do you think that Mitt Romney, do you think Mitt Romney, it's a liability that he's so rich. And he goes, he's not rich. I'm rich. You know, and the reason that Americans, the difference is the American experiment is beautiful. Because when the reason we don't have pitchforks outside and the rich don't get, you know, guillotined and lynched is because every American knows that they too could one day be a millionaire. So there's a potential. The potential to be a millionaire is huge in the American spirit. And it's a large part of the glue that keeps this republic working.

[Cody Sanchez]

You're right. Do you know the percentage of millionaires that are self made in the U.S. 79%. Which you would never see on the news, right? 79%. And I think that's a really good reminder. And also they don't fucking stay there. Which is a perfect point about being in business because most small business owners, 90% of our cash is in our businesses.

[Brian Callan]

Yes.

[Cody Sanchez]

We don't even. We don't. We, you know, we're not rolling around in a dough. And also, like when people get mad about Donald, billionaires. No, that's what I said.

[Brian Callan]

I know people who have a billion, they, the huge money, it's all wrapped up in stock.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, 100%. And you know, and one of my team members always jokes because, you know, you come on these podcasts and like, what's the thing that you spent the most amount of money on ever? Like, did you ever get asked that question? Yeah, and I. Joking, I didn't jokingly. I said it just accidentally out loud the first time. But I was like, well, people. And I was like, I don't mean it that way, but like, I just. You end up hiring more people in business because that's how you make a business grow. And like, I think that's the real answer for most people.

[Brian Callan]

That's, that's interesting too. I wouldn't have answered that, but yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

It'S probably unreasonable that I have. Wait, I want to talk about making money in comedy. So, like, I went to a comedy show the other day at the Comedy Store in la and it was incredible. It was like there were like maybe like 20 comics that went through kind of rapidly. Whitney Cummings is there. Was there who was like a big name. I like her a lot, and a bunch of other ones. I can't remember all the names, but a couple other big names. And it was, I don't know, Maybe like a two hour show, I guess, and 60 people in the audience. And so I'm doing the math. I'm like, nobody's making money. Nobody's making any fucking money.

[Brian Callan]

That's not where you make money. How do you make 25 for that? Did you make 24? 15?

[Cody Sanchez]

No, you're not making money there. So wait, wait, Whitney Cummings has to go there for 15?

[Brian Callan]

No, but she's not doing it for that. You're doing it just to stay sharp and you're doing fun and stuff like that.

[Cody Sanchez]

So it's like a podcast. You come for free.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah. You make your money on the road.

[Cody Sanchez]

Okay, so how does that work exactly?

[Brian Callan]

You, you, you charge a certain amount for tickets, you get the door or you get a guarantee, or you get 8% of the door or you get a piece of the alcohol sales. And it's just all depends on how your agent works it. And if you can sell a theater twice in a night, you'll make a lot of money.

[Cody Sanchez]

Define a lot. So like in, you know, so the.

[Brian Callan]

Comics that you, the big comics are making 20 to 30 million dollars a.

[Cody Sanchez]

Year on touring or on everything.

[Brian Callan]

On tour?

[Cody Sanchez]

On touring. And that's because they are doing like, I don't know, 50, 60.

[Brian Callan]

Some of them are making stocks, 700 grand a night.

[Cody Sanchez]

On a night. Okay. But it's not just from ticket sales. They Get a percentage of alcohol and then merch.

[Brian Callan]

It's just you're able to sell, you know, Matt rife, I think sold a $65 million deal or something like that with Live Nation, something like that. But, you know, but.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, so he gets guarantees up front.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, but people there. There are especially a lot of women, like, love Matt, dude.

[Cody Sanchez]

Great demographic, too.

[Brian Callan]

Matt, like, young, beautiful, but he's also a great guy. And he also works really hard at comedy and he's also really respectful. I've known Matt since he was 17. This kid's been. This kid's been working his ass off.

[Cody Sanchez]

And he's incredible at social media.

[Brian Callan]

It's just that he's. He's just. He never always was. He's just a kid who, you know, he's just. He's just. He's a beautiful looking human being. But Matt's also a guy who. He's also a good guy who really wants to be good at comedy and works really hard at it. And something just hit. And then a lot of people, a lot of young girls were like. A lot of women in general are like, I want. He's delicious. He's delicious and he's funny, and I want to be. I just want to go see him. It's like a rock star.

[Cody Sanchez]

Is that what they say about you, too?

[Brian Callan]

Constantly. Naturally. Yeah. And I haven't even done my hair. I haven't done my hair. I'm getting. I'm gonna get a hair transplant.

[Cody Sanchez]

Why?

[Brian Callan]

Because it's free? Because somebody's paying for it.

[Cody Sanchez]

Seriously?

[Brian Callan]

Yep. And it's. I'm gonna get 2,500 grafts. So you think I'm hot now?

[Cody Sanchez]

I am.

[Brian Callan]

I cannot wait till I come in. And I'm gonna be like that. Yep. And I'm gonna get my face tightened and. Yep. I'm not. I'm not done. And then I'm gonna get. I'm finally gonna go on testosterone and maybe some anabol or d. Anabol. I don't know what the. I don't know the names of the steroids, but know this. My skin will be tight, veiny as fuck. I'm gonna shave and I'm gonna tan, and I'm coming in here and I will be in a tank top and I'm gonna get tattoos. I don't have one tattoo, but I'm getting tattoos. What's the name of this podcast?

[Cody Sanchez]

The Big Deal? Yeah, the Big Deal that actually tracks.

[Brian Callan]

Right on my tits. But you're not gonna be able to read it because of all the fucking divots. All the divots. I hope you read braille. Oh, I'm hilarious.

[Cody Sanchez]

You are funny. I think we should go to this special. Okay. So you don't make a ton of money in comedy unless you're doing a shit ton of tours.

[Brian Callan]

No, you make money. I mean, I make money in comedy.

[Cody Sanchez]

Doing tours though. Like, you can't really make it anywhere else. Like, where else special you can make money on a special? No, that's.

[Brian Callan]

That's your infomercial.

[Cody Sanchez]

Whoa. Interesting for you to sell.

[Brian Callan]

I mean, you'll get paid, you know, sometimes, but that's not where people are making. Making their real money interesting. Touring, touring, it's just like music.

[Cody Sanchez]

So what happens?

[Brian Callan]

Don't make money off their, you know, their album. Make money live, touring.

[Cody Sanchez]

So you have to. Taylor Swift it. You got to have like this whole ecosystem around you.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, I met her a long time ago one time and she had just come off a tour and it was a 365 day tour and man, they. She was on a bus or a private plane, I think literally every night. I mean, they would come and play Tokyo for three days and then they'd go and go to London or they just do this tour. But I mean, it's crazy.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's really hard. I don't think it. And you know what kills me with Taylor Swift? That I am most impressed about that. She can make that surprised face every single time she goes on tour for like 25 years. And I still buy it.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, I don't. She's, you know, special human being. I don't know.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, that's part of being able to.

[Brian Callan]

Sing the same song over and over again. I can never do it, but neither. But she can do it.

[Cody Sanchez]

So you don't do the same jokes. Like, how does that, how does that work? Like from. For a total normie, do you carry like a joke book around? And then when you say something funny, you write down.

[Brian Callan]

If I end up doing. Writing for me is it's a mindset. You're always writing. But if I end up doing a show, I'm like, so I'm going to shoot this special in January. And then. And then the horror sets in because now I have to like write a whole new hour. I throw it all away. And it's like so difficult not to repeat yourself. It's so difficult not to be kind of on the same themes. It's so difficult not to. It's just so hard. So I'll go through six months of misery and maybe a Year of writer's block and feel like a piece of shit and not like myself and all that. Just. Just old standard.

[Cody Sanchez]

Standard shit that happens like, once a year. How often do you do a special?

[Brian Callan]

Probably every two or three years.

[Cody Sanchez]

Okay.

[Brian Callan]

Really? Three is. Two years is like, not enough time for me. I gotta. You know, I wrote. Right. Pretty fast. But to let it really settle in.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

Like, just doing this. Like, this is gonna be. I don't know. Since, man. Tears. I don't know. Almost. Almost. Almost three years. Maybe it's two years wild. I don't know. But, man, it's like, you know, and then. And it's everything. Talk about, like, every drop. It's like it's everything I can do. It's my best. It's the best. I can do the best.

[Cody Sanchez]

And you get only one shot, or.

[Brian Callan]

Do you film three, shoot two?

[Cody Sanchez]

Or maybe do you chop them together like the best part?

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, you can.

[Cody Sanchez]

Okay.

[Brian Callan]

But either way, it's just gonna be a.

[Cody Sanchez]

Interesting hard, I bet.

[Brian Callan]

No, that's not hard. Shooting is not hard. It's just that it's. Then I have to be like, I gotta write new jokes. I gotta write a new. I gotta be thematic. Good luck.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah.

[Brian Callan]

I just want to quit.

[Cody Sanchez]

No, it's gonna be great. I can't wait to see it. Yeah. What about how, like, kind of technically. And maybe this isn't how it works, but how do you start thinking about being funny? Like, how does one become funny?

[Brian Callan]

I don't think you have to. You think about being funny. I think you have to. You have to do something very different. I think I believe you. Start with personal questions. What am I afraid of? Who am I pretending to be? Who do I want to be? Who am I really? How do I want to die? How do I not want to die? What do I want to say before I die? What do I want to think right before I die? What will I regret before I die? You know, what do I honestly revere? You know, what am I really afraid of? What am I pretending I'm afraid of? Get into those questions, those personal questions. And I think that anybody who writes anything, whether it's music or it's a movie or anything, is. You're trying to answer a primary question. You're wrestling with a question. My obsession has been, what is a man? What is courage? What is it? What is masculinity? How do you define it? You know, am I a provider and a protector? What does that really mean? And what is courage? And what is toughness? And all these Things that I grew up trying to be. What is real strength? What is it? And those are the. Those are the obsessions I've always had and I try to write about. And, you know, for me, they find their way in a funny. Through funny channels. Yeah, but, you know, think about. So what's a book? When you read a novel, you know, the great novels. I mean, the theme of any novel. So the theme. The way to define theme is it's essentially the author's argument for how to behave in the world, you know.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, it is, it is.

[Brian Callan]

And so I think that frankly, my special is that way, you know, that I hope. I hope it's. I hope it's. I hope thematically I get what I want to say across.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. You know, and so you. You actually start. Maybe that's why so often comics these days are a little bit like philosophers, because you're starting from really questions you.

[Brian Callan]

Do when you're younger. You. You're trying to just be funny. It's English on a ball, you know. But.

[Cody Sanchez]

But what does that mean, English?

[Brian Callan]

That's a pool expression. I stole that from Rogan. But it's a. It's a. It's a. It's a. It's a pool expression. Like you. You put a lot of spit on the ball, but it doesn't mean you can run a table. Doesn't mean you're a great pool player. You're. You're good at trick shots.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. You're like the hard to the version. Okay. Sports analogy. Look at that.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, but it's true. Okay, okay, so that's. Then you get older and you want to say something.

[Cody Sanchez]

Right. I guess that's sort of even like you watch the evolution of Dave Chappelle. And like today, you know, I remember we got to sit down and watch him and Rogan when he was doing it here during COVID which felt really special because the world was so shut down. But I remember sitting there thinking, the most interesting part of this is not that we're laughing, although there is laughter. It's like the command of big questions and like watching one human really deeply dive into it live.

[Brian Callan]

I was watching Dave. I was watching Dave in tiny shows in New York 20, 30 years ago.

[Cody Sanchez]

Interesting. Did you know then, 28 years ago, can you tell that somebody is going to be great when you first see them? No.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah, in a way, you can certainly tell somebody's going to be successful. Success is a mindset that you're probably partially born with. Rogan was going to be successful no matter What? He was a bulldog. But part of it's also growing up. How did you grow up? Did you grow up without a dad, where the world was really dangerous and you had to figure out how to navigate the world? Was your heart broken at a very early age and you realized nobody was coming and it was all up to you? Were you 50 Cent, where you had no one to go home to? And then you got shot nine times and you bled all your fear out in the back of that cab. You know, who were you? When did you meet Chaos? You know, a great deal of world leaders lost almost. I don't know, some crazy percentage of them lost at least one parent before the age of 12, usually 2. And if you're taught how to navigate that, if you're taught how to navigate loss, or you have some kind, you have the reserves, or maybe the imagination, maybe you were wired to deal with that. Maybe you had a stronger seawall. You'll come out much stronger. I think it was Nietzsche who said, if I have children, if I ever had children, I would wish upon them deprivation and loss and uncertainty. Because that's the only way you kind of become a fully realized human being. And if it visits you young enough, as tragic as it is, if somebody's there to help you, if you can find one outlet where you learn how to accomplish something, will you learn how to be good at it? You're going to always carry that baggage, but it makes for a strong piece of steel.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. I've never actually met a successful human who hasn't been through something that almost literally destroyed them.

[Brian Callan]

That's right.

[Cody Sanchez]

I think that that's tracks.

[Brian Callan]

That's an important thing as I'm at my age. You know, if something really bad happened to you, just keep moving forward because it may be the best thing that ever happened to you. When you look back on it, or as awful as it is, you may. If a gun was to your head, if you do it right and you keep moving forward, you will probably say much. I know you won't believe me now if you're going through it now, but you'll probably say, I wouldn't have changed it. It saved my soul. It saved my soul. And I know that's traumatic, but I believe it.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, I get a little chills on that one. I think that's true.

[Brian Callan]

That's because I'm bringing my voice down and I'm looking at the camera and I'm saying it in the air. And I didn't use Katharine Hepburn's voice. No.

[Cody Sanchez]

But do you have that whispery.

[Brian Callan]

Yes. Because I've got a great deal of, of soda in my voice, don't I?

[Cody Sanchez]

Do.

[Brian Callan]

I do. I know. It's really. I put everyone to sleep.

[Cody Sanchez]

Let's end with this one. I found a rather high number of videos of you and Brendan Schwab physically fighting online. What's the deal with that?

[Brian Callan]

Because Brendan needs to learn. He needs to learn. And I don't like sometimes that he's disrespectful. And I'm older and I come at him. I come at him and sometimes as a. I guess a baboon. That's, that's British for baboon. I, I gotta fight the bear. And a baboon, let's call me a dog. A dog's never gonna beat a bear. But a dog can take the fight to the bear and just give him the what for. And in the dog's heart, as he's being crushed, he knows at least, at least he had the balls to jump into the, into the belly of the beast. And part of. It's just like sometimes I like to feel what it's like to be killed by a grown man that easily because it keeps me in check.

[Cody Sanchez]

He's very large.

[Brian Callan]

You have no idea. You have no idea. You know, it's, it's, it's, it's. He had this recent thing with Nate Diaz and I like Nate and all that, but, yeah, you know, like you, you have to understand that Brendan is a heavyweight. And Brendan walks around at 250, but a lot of times, 260, there's not a lot of fat on him. He's bam. Bam. He's about as strong as your average gorilla, okay? And he's a legit black belt in jiu jitsu, okay? And I've seen him tap the most famous people you can imagine. I've seen him tap with ease. Olympians. I've seen him crush very famous fighters. Very famous. And they're all 200 plus pounds. I've seen it with my own eyes, okay? Many times. He never talks about it, but I've seen it. I've seen it. So if you are under a heavyweight and you're spouting off, just know that he's a bear. And there's a time where he's going to grab you. Now I've, I have. He was taking a nap one time. I got, I jumped on him. I put him in a deep judo. A deep judo. I had my hips out. I had, I had a gable grip. I had him Here I had him pinched deep, and I had him right here. And I was like, say something. Say it. And, I mean, you're not getting out of that. Look at this. Look at that right there. I wish you guys could see what I'm working with, because there's. I got chimp strength right there. I'm here. I'm pulling tight. I've got his head and arm. And you're not going anywhere. And all he does is giggle. Yep. He giggles. And then the curtain shuts, and in reality goes like that on me. And all of a sudden, now I'm in. I'm. I'm. I mean, I'm basically. I'm being. I'm in a position that you don't want to be in. I mean, I'm basically his bitch.

[Cody Sanchez]

Oh, my God. So I. With the special in January, when we get your, like, number one Netflix spot.

[Brian Callan]

Yeah.

[Cody Sanchez]

Maybe that needs to be the end of the show. Just you and Brendan just fighting backstage. Fighting.

[Brian Callan]

Wrestling.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah, it's like the next stage. It's like UFC and comedy together. I don't think anybody's done.

[Brian Callan]

The problem is, every time I try to do that, I tried going takedowns with him, and I got a contusion on my ear. This side of my face was red for about 11 days.

[Cody Sanchez]

All right.

[Brian Callan]

Sprawled on me.

[Cody Sanchez]

We're gonna need a workshop.

[Brian Callan]

I'm getting too old.

[Cody Sanchez]

Perfect right now.

[Brian Callan]

I still do jiu jitsu. I rolled the other day with a bunch of 20 somethings. I couldn't look left for, like, 10 days.

[Cody Sanchez]

That's like, after you work out with Tim Kennedy. Oh, it's not okay.

[Brian Callan]

I tried to. I tried to grapple with Tim on a beach in the south of France. Very romantic. And he. I just remember being on all fours, and he was on top of me, on top of me. And he, very appropriately drew a heart in the sand. He was controlling me with his legs. I'm a grown man.

[Cody Sanchez]

I can see. And you talk about grizzly bear eyes an odd amount of time, but he has those eyes. Yeah, he has those, like, just dark shark eyes.

[Brian Callan]

He'll. He'll take your head.

[Cody Sanchez]

Yeah. But smile the whole time. Like a psychopath.

[Brian Callan]

Kill you.

[Cody Sanchez]

I love that man.

[Brian Callan]

Also one of my favorite people on the planet.

[Cody Sanchez]

All right, Brian Callan, thank you so much for being here today. I can't wait to see the special. I can't wait. You're on tour, so I'm gonna definitely come to a few of those. And on Instagram, anything that's hilar. Well, you could tell me when you wanted to. And we can. We can align it.

[Brian Callan]

Brian Callum.com Now I'm being God. I'll be all over Buffalo. I'll be all over Florida.

[Cody Sanchez]

100%. And they should actually go to your Instagram first and follow because there's some hysterical videos. You're also funny.

[Brian Callan]

You're one of my million followers plus.