Podcast Summary: BILFPOD

Episode: The Unapologetic Mother: Dr. Karla Lee on Power, Parenting & Presence
Host: Mara Dorne
Guest: Dr. Karla Lee
Date: February 12, 2026

Main Theme & Purpose

This episode centers on unapologetic motherhood, personal and professional reinvention, and embracing authenticity. Host Mara Dorne chats with Dr. Karla Lee, pharmacist-turned-content creator and advocate, exploring her life journey, motherhood’s messy reality, and the importance of separating shame from behavior to achieve freedom and happiness. The discussion is candid, humorous, and relatable, embracing the chaos of family and work while challenging the expectations placed on women.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Dr. Karla Lee’s Journey: From Pharmacy to Advocacy

• Background & Education
  • Karla shares how her early aspiration to be a pharmacist was pushed by family, especially her mother’s insistence (01:37). She attended Auburn University, driven partly by wanting to stay near her boyfriend (now husband).
• Career in Hospice Care
  • Found deep fulfillment in hospice pharmacy work:

    “It is such a privilege and honor to be in conversations around someone’s transition.” (03:32)

  • Emphasizes the positivity and meaning in hospice, countering common assumptions about sadness (05:04).
• Corporate Challenges & Resilience
  • Describes experiencing workplace bias and a toxic superior at United Healthcare/Optum, leading to her internal transfer (07:11–11:45).
  • Explains advocating for employees, aiming to say “yes” and help people access their benefits (12:03–13:16).

2. The Realities of Motherhood

• Rejecting Perfection
  • Karla's content began from a desire for honesty about the chaos of motherhood, in contrast to “Instagram motherhood” (13:32; 13:53).
  • Both she and Mara discuss never achieving “balance”—always just prioritizing and “winging it.” (14:51–15:01)
• Relatable Parenting Moments
  • Talk of scrambling through daily life, mismatching kids’ outfits, and feeling like “a mom in a boat with holes constantly.” (15:01–15:38)
  • Acknoledger of chaos with three kids, siblings’ rivalries, and different parenting for each child by birth order (16:03–17:53).
• Navigating Technology & Modern Childhood
  • Confessing to less control over youngest kids’ screen time and digital exposures (19:01–19:45).

3. Content Creation, Authenticity, and Community

• Origin of Karla’s Platform
  • Sought a safe space to express motherhood’s truths, feeling her support system sometimes dismissed her feelings due to “privilege." (19:51–20:25)
  • Yearned for her mom’s presence and emotional support, beyond material or practical help (20:44–20:51).
• Shame and Behavior
  • Addresses shame as a barrier to personal freedom and authenticity:

    “Once you separate yourself from being ashamed of any behavior, good or bad, you are free.” (43:57)

  • Discusses cultural pressure for mothers to be only grateful and not vocal about their simultaneous stress. (14:05, 13:53)
• Imposter Syndrome
  • Both reflect on “imposter syndrome” as presenting a perfect surface while struggling below, like “a duck paddling frantically under the water.” (24:14–24:55)

4. Advocacy in Parenting and Schooling

• Fighting for Neurodivergent Kids
  • Karla details her commitment to public schools for her neurodivergent children due to the support structures private schools lack (504, IEPs). (25:21–26:29)
  • Shares stories of advocating assertively at the school board level, balancing self-doubt and determination (26:29–29:22).
• Cultural Double-Standards & Gender Roles
  • They discuss societal tags like “rude” or “aggressive” when women are assertive, contrasting responses if a man made requests (40:13–41:39).
  • Both are comfortable with some gender roles at home but emphasize partnership and fair division of labor (41:13–42:43).

5. Finding & Defining Purpose Beyond Titles

• Vision for the Future
  • Karla’s dream is to foster a community of “unapologetically high maintenance women,” who know their value, ask for what they deserve, and refuse to be shamed for high standards (39:32–40:23).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the Chaos of Motherhood:

  “I can be insanely grateful for the three kids, but then also feel like I have too many kids. My motherhood doesn't look like that.” — Dr. Karla Lee (00:02, 13:53)

• On Authenticity and Freedom:

  “Once you separate yourself from being ashamed of any behavior, good or bad, you are free.” — Dr. Karla Lee (00:16, 43:57)

• On the Myth of Having It All Together:

  “When you see a duck on the water, it's like gliding smoothly. But if you ever had a camera to go underneath, they're like fighting for their life.” — Dr. Karla Lee (24:14)

• On Imposter Syndrome:

  “Everybody's swimming the same way… Everybody's feet are moving two times faster than their bodies.” — Dr. Karla Lee (24:29)

• On Building Community:

  “My big vision for myself is to build a community of women that are unapologetically high maintenance… that will walk into any room and expect the best because they deserve it.” — Dr. Karla Lee (39:32)

• On Gender Norms at Home:

  “I do believe in gender roles… at the heart of a family someone has to be that nurturing side.” — Dr. Karla Lee (41:41)

• On Letting Go of Shame:

  “No mistake that I've made reflects on me as a person; it's just like, where I was at the time, I made the best decision with the information I had.” — Dr. Karla Lee (22:19)

Timestamps for Major Segments

• [01:37] — Karla’s path into pharmacy and family influences
• [03:32] — Positivity in hospice work
• [07:11–11:45] — Workplace injustice & internal career moves
• [13:32–16:20] — Honest motherhood, chaos, and the myth of balance
• [19:51–22:19] — Building a truthful platform, privilege and pain, destigmatizing behavioral shame
• [24:14–24:55] — “Duck on the water” analogy, imposter syndrome
• [25:21–29:22] — School advocacy, being a “difficult parent,” advocating for children
• [39:32–40:23] — Vision: "Unapologetically high-maintenance women”
• [43:57] — Dr. Lee’s advice: Shame vs. behavior

Closing Advice

“My biggest piece of advice would be to address the connection that your mind draws between your behavior and shame. Once you separate yourself from being ashamed of any behavior, good or bad, you are free.” — Dr. Karla Lee (43:57)

Where to Find Dr. Karla Lee

• Blog: threelittlelee.com
• Social: TikTok, Instagram, Threads, Facebook — @ThreeLittleLee

This episode is a must-listen for any parent, working woman, or anyone interested in the messy, wonderful struggle of showing up authentically in all parts of life. Dr. Karla Lee embodies the “Boss I’d Like To Follow” spirit—real, unfiltered, dedicated, and driven to lift herself and others up.