“Why Women Lose Respect for Weak Men" — Sadia Khan UNFILTERED on Relationships & Controversy

Summary

Podcast Summary: “Why Women Lose Respect for Weak Men”

Biohack-it with Iman Hasan
Guest: Sadia Khan (Sadia Psychology)
Release Date: January 29, 2026

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Overview

In this episode of Biohack-it, host Iman Hasan sits down with Sadia Khan, the viral and controversial psychology content creator known for her candid takes on modern relationships, high-value men and women, gender dynamics, and cultural contrasts between East and West. They dive deep into viral controversies, Sadia’s personal journey, and her unfiltered opinions on why women lose respect for "weak" men, redefining what makes a relationship thrive and the cultural forces shaping women’s (and men’s) expectations.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Record Straight: Online Controversy & Reputation (02:26—11:10)

• Viral Clip & Legal Issues:
  • Sadia addresses a viral, damaging audio clip wrongly interpreted as evidence of her being with a married man. After legal review, she explains the clip was a distorted, years-old private conversation taken out of context and weaponized for online clout.
  • Quote: “The venom that you must have to hold onto that, snip it, and then give it to online just to destroy somebody's reputation and career… is a very common trait.” (04:13, Sadia)
• Privacy & Public Persona:
  • Sadia emphasizes why she keeps her private life, marriage, and family completely offline to shield them from online hostility.
  • Reflects on the dangers of mixing personal and professional: “I don't talk about [my family]...because they didn't sign up for any of this.” (09:25, Sadia)
• High-Value Content vs. Qualifications:
  • Explains her role as an educator and therapist, and why her expertise comes from both global client experience and academic background (addressed later at 71:14–73:00).

2. Cultural Identity & Value Systems (11:10–13:10; 63:06–66:39)

• Both Iman and Sadia reflect on their South Asian and Eastern heritage, discussing how values of collectivism, nurturing, and community influence their approach to life and relationships.
  • Sadia: “Happiness is an outcome of being really useful as a man. In the western world, they chase happiness first.” (55:17, Sadia)
• Sadia maintains pride in her background, pushing back on the Western narrative:
  • “I'm so glad I'm not Western. I'm so proud to be Eastern.” (00:21, Sadia)
  • Iman adds: “We always gravitate to what's familiar to us. Right. And so that sense of home is what I've been searching for.” (45:48, Iman)

3. Modern Dating Problems & Social Media’s Impact (14:14–15:22)

• Social networks and dating apps have warped expectations:
  • “Similarity feels like settling, when really, it’s exactly what they should be going for...Now they're thinking, I need a 10 out of 10 Instagram baddie.” (14:14, Sadia)

4. Defining ‘High-Value’ Men & Women (15:22–22:23, 33:22–35:30, 35:47–39:35)

• High-Value Women:
  • Self-care, selectivity in partners, personal achievement, and reciprocity.
  • “If you are unable to reject men that are bad for you, you cannot be high value… the main thing is you give as good as you get.” (15:34, Sadia)
• High-Value Men:
  • Self-control, problem-solving, decisive leadership, and provider mentality—but not in a way that breeds “submission” when paired with the wrong woman.
  • “If he's not a good decision maker, can't solve any problems, and has zero self control, he's just a mess.” (18:33, Sadia)

5. Gender Roles & Submission vs. Partnership (20:36–24:00)

• Eastern upbringing instills mutual roles; nurturing isn't shameful; partnership means delegation, not submission.
  • “Really intelligent high-value women, they're not submissive. They just know when to delegate and there's a big difference.” (22:23, Sadia)
• Submission should be a natural outcome of a man’s good leadership, not a blanket expectation.

6. Why Women Lose Respect for Weak Men (24:47–29:02)

• Therapy and social media have promoted hyper-feminized, emotionally indulgent men (often termed “soy boys”), which paradoxically turn off women.
  • “They don’t want a man that’s going to sit there and cry about his dad…they want to know: what are you going to do about it?” (25:11, Sadia)
  • Dominance is mischaracterized but, when healthy, is the trait women most crave in men:
    • “Number one trait that they’re craving in a man is dominance...not abuse, just he’s into you, initiating, and setting a direction.” (27:10, Sadia)

7. Family Dynamics & Loyalty (29:02–36:50)

• Brooklyn Beckham case: Is loyalty to spouse “dominance,” or does it slide into manipulation/submission?
  • “If you can't stand up to your wife, or your mom, you're just a bitch.” (32:37, Sadia)
• Both argue true strength is in being able to balance loyalty, not being “brainwashed” by either side.

8. The Importance of Male Intelligence & Unmanipulability (35:47–39:35)

• Women, consciously or unconsciously, test men’s boundaries. When a man can’t “catch” manipulation, he loses respect.
  • “There’s only one thing all women want, and that is a man that they can never manipulate.” (35:51, Sadia)

9. Provider vs. Protector: What Matters More? (39:35–41:21)

• While intelligence and awareness are important, provider status still wins out for women seeking to start a family.

10. Safe Nervous Systems, Emotional Regulation, & Honesty (43:51–47:44)

• Both women reflect on relationships where emotional safety, calmness, and reliability are more valuable than “fireworks.”
  • “As a regulated woman, you want to look for a man that soothes your nervous system, makes you feel safe.” (43:55, Iman)

11. Financial Security, Ambition, and Fair Gender Expectations (48:03–49:51)

• Sadia and Iman push back on the idea that wanting financial security is “materialistic” for women.
  • “We shouldn’t be shaming women for thinking financial security and stability is a bad thing.” (48:48, Iman)

12. The Role of Children and Family Fulfillment (50:32–60:43)

• “You simply cannot keep providing when pregnant, kids, everything. It’s just too much for a woman...” (39:45, Sadia)
• While not all women need children to feel fulfilled, Sadia sees unconditional love for children as a unique kind of purpose, more stable than that from partners.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Viral Attacks and Cancel Culture

• “There's a loud segment of society that's waiting for the downfall and would try and engineer it so that they can try and destroy you as much as they can.” (05:05, Sadia)
• “You saved my marriage… but you're just a whore.” (69:12, Sadia, reflecting on ungratefulness of the online mob)

Why Women Lose Respect for Weak Men

• “If I can manipulate you, anyone can manipulate you. You're just a bitch.” (32:37, Sadia)
• “Submission should be a natural outcome of his good decision making…but wherever he can’t make the good decisions, she actually has to step up.” (23:05, Sadia)

Cultural Clash

• “I'm so glad I'm not Western. I'm so proud to be Eastern.” (00:21, Sadia)

On the Role of Dominance

• “Dominance is seen as an ugly word when really it's what women truly respond to.” (28:32, Sadia)
• “We almost would rather a dominant strong man than a submissive weak man.” (28:57, Sadia)

Dating in the Age of Social Media

• “They’ve got these standards that they’ve kind of got from Instagram and TikTok...applying it to their little world, which just simply doesn’t apply.” (14:14, Sadia)

Attraction, Admiration, Adoration

• “Go for attraction. Then you have admire who he is, and then he shows you some love and adoration back.” (87:47, Sadia)
• “If you bypass attraction and think: he treats me well, so kind to me… the intimacy will drop, and you almost become like brother and sister.” (87:51, Sadia)

On Generational Gender Differences

• “Men will get to 70 and still think: ‘Where do I meet women?’” (51:24, Sadia)

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Important Timestamps by Topic

| Time | Topic | |-------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:26–11:10 | Online controversy, privacy, and the viral audio clip | | 14:14 | How social media distorts dating expectations | | 15:34 | What is a “high-value woman?”/self-selection | | 18:33 | What defines a “high-value man?” | | 20:36–24:00 | Gender roles—provider, nurturer, partnership vs. submission | | 24:47–29:02 | Weak men, the consequences, “soy boys,” and why women seek dominance | | 29:02–36:50 | Family loyalty, Brooklyn Beckham, and cultural contrasts on family roles | | 35:47–39:35 | Women test men’s intelligence/manipulation and respect | | 39:45 | Provider vs. intelligence: what matters more? | | 43:51–47:44 | Emotional safety and 'stable' relationships—what Iman/Sadia value | | 50:32–60:43 | Children, family structure, and women's fulfillment | | 71:14–73:00 | Credentials, the “Sadia Psychology” brand, and online attacks | | 87:47–89:46 | Three essential “must-haves” for women choosing partners |

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Practical Relationship Advice for Women (87:47–89:46)

• Find physical attraction: Don’t bypass sexual chemistry—it builds intimacy and connection.
• Admiration is critical: Admire your partner for something—be it success, humor, or character.
• Adoration from your partner: Your partner should express genuine appreciation and love. This fosters security and reduces anxiety.
• These three ebb and flow over time, but solid foundations endure.

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Closing Thoughts

Iman closes the episode reflecting on how direct and refreshingly honest she found Sadia, emphasizing the Biohack-it mission: to be curious, challenge viral assumptions, and weigh all perspectives through personal conversation. Sadia’s advice ultimately centers on honest self-assessment (for both men and women), cultural wisdom, and resisting online groupthink.

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Overall Tone

Unfiltered, culturally rooted, candid, and pragmatic. Both women blend personal experience, psychology, and cultural perspective—balancing vulnerability with outspoken clarity.

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Episode Recommended For:
Anyone interested in the intersection of modern relationships, cultural values, gender dynamics, and personal development. Especially relevant for women navigating dating, marriage, and self-actualization in a noisy, online-first world.

Transcript

[A]

And my guest today, he tried to.

[B]

Stab me in the back thinking he would get famous out of it.

[A]

Caught me by surprise.

[B]

There's a loud segment of society that's waiting for the downfall and would try and engineer it so they can try and destroy you as much as they can.

[A]

You might have seen this incredible woman online.

[B]

If your wife is cheating on you, she'll probably cheat on you forever and she's probably just using you for free accommodation.

[A]

You guys must have been pissed when you heard him interviewing her.

[B]

I'm so glad I'm not Western. I'm so proud to be Eastern. Happiness is an outcome of being really useful as a man.

[A]

When I told our team, I was like, I want to bring on Saadia. Do you want to bring on this woman? She's had this huge controversy.

[B]

So if I can manipulate you, anyone can manipulate you. You're just a bitch. When you don't have a religion or a culture or an identity, you over identify with things like your gender.

[A]

Sadia Psychology. Who do you think cheats more, men or women nowadays? What is a high value woman?

[B]

I would say.

[A]

Hi guys and welcome back to another episode of biohacket. And my guest today caught me by surprise and completely caught me off guard. So you might have seen this incredible woman online, but you guys must have been pissed when you heard him interviewing her. Sadia Psychology and I got to sit down and peel away a little bit at the layers of what is heard online versus what is the truth. I walked into this interview not knowing how I would feel about her and I walked out of this interview really enjoying her company and actually seeing a lot of what she says and where the content comes from. Value system alignment, us talking about our eastern background and culture and even off camera understanding Saadia's story and how the content that has gone viral has completely ruined her personal life and her career. Sadia's book is also coming out called Red Flags. It's for pre order now. And if you're curious and you want to know where red flags are in people because she makes some really good points, I would order it. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode as much as I enjoyed filming it. So guys, don't forget to like comment and subscribe. And thank you for allowing me to be your creator and telling people's stories that I'm interested in with judgment, with no judgment. But I'm here to give you a good show. Curiosity heals. Stay tuned for more. So Sadia, welcome to the show.

[B]

Thank you so much for having me. It's so nice to finally meet you.

[A]

I know. And I'm so excited you're Pakistani. So I was like, I definitely am going to bring this woman onto the show and talk to her. Because you're desi.

[B]

I am.

[A]

And I want to highlight women from our part of the world.

[B]

I'm so glad that I get to do that with you. So thank you. Yeah, I really do appreciate it because I feel like I never really get to talk about that side because it's not really that interesting. So I do appreciate you mentioning that.

[A]

I do want to say that when I told our team, I was like, I want to bring on Sadia and TikTok was going viral and they're like, do you want to bring on this woman? She's had this huge controversy. So I know you've already explained it to people online, but I just want to give the little snippet and introduction and explanation for people listening about what the clips were.

[B]

Well, yes, I. When I first heard the clips, I completely thought they were fake. I was like, there's no such thing. I've never been with a married man, never been with an engaged man. It simply can't be true. So I just assumed it was AI. But when I spoke to a lawyer, because it just went viral, it just literally was going to be there. And then when I spoke to a lawyer, they just said, well, it says it's in 2021. Why don't you just contact people you knew in 2021 and see if there's anything anyone could have done or anything like that. So I spoke to everybody I worked with. I was a teacher at the time. I wasn't online, completely anonymous, and most of my colleagues had no idea. But one colleague said to me, I don't know if you remember this, but sending me some funny memes about girls in Dubai and cheating and all this stuff. And one of the girls that I was seeing and he was, you know, doing his thing in Dubai, young single man in Dubai. One of the girls saw the emails and she got really angry and she rang you. I said, I think I remember that, but why would. Why would this come out? And he said, she recorded you without you knowing? And in the clip, she said to you, oh, what do you do all day? Do you just send memes and try and suck guys? And then that's what she said. And I said, excuse me, don't get rude to me. If I wanted to, I could XYZ on his wedding day, on his birthday. I'm very fiery. So if Someone tries to accuse me of something, I'm like, you know what? If I want to, I can do XYZ if I wanted to, but I don't want your man. And I went on to say, I don't even want your man. He calls me all the time, I don't even want your man. You shouldn't even want your man. And I said that. But what she did is recorded me without me knowing, held onto it for five years and waited to give it to somebody who had a really big following and just make him snip that tiny bit to create the narrative that I was with a married man. And she held onto it for that many years to wait for that moment. And that's where it went from from that moment on. And it just went viral from there. I've taken legal action. So luckily, you know, unfortunately, I can't say too much because in Dubai they're very, very strict with keeping anonymity. But the. There is zero truth to the idea that I was with a married man or an engaged man or anything like that. But there is definitely truth to the fact that I said things. I still don't take it back. If someone tries to accuse me of something I didn't do, I'd be like, you know what I'm going to do? Duh, duh, duh. I'm not really going to do it. I'm just fiery like that. But I was just. I was baffled where this came from because this woman I've never spoken to, she's never been married, she's never been Eng. Her name's Lena Elfella. I'm more than happy to explain it because she's in the uk, so it's okay to say their names, but you can Google her. There's zero evidence of her being married, engaged, or even in a relationship with this man. They haven't even spoken in five years. He said, I only spoke to her for three months, but I remember her doing this to you. But the venom that you must have to hold onto that, snip it, and then give it to online just to destroy somebody's reputation and career is something I thought would. I was convinced it couldn't be her. I was like, no woman would do that. I've never done anything to her. No one would do that. But then having seen how people reacted to it, there's so many people filled with hate. There's so many people waiting for their moment to destroy somebody that I now realize that actually this is a very common trait. The people I know are just not like that. But if you don't, there's a small segment of, well, not small. There's a loud segment of society that's waiting for the downfall and would try and engineer it so that they can try and destroy you as much as they can. And unfortunately that's what happened.

[A]

Did Is it legal in the UK to record somebody and keep them? Because in the US that's not legal.

[B]

It's not, it's. Anything is legal in the UK because I've tried contacting them several times to take legal action, they just won't do much about it. But in Dubai, luckily nothing's legal. So if you hold onto it and do all of these things, Dubai really, really takes action. They have been incredible. The Dubai police has been absolutely incredible. The UK police has been useless, unfortunately. And they know that they're useless. They know that they're absolutely useless. But one thing I would say in Dubai, even without paying a penny in tax, your every crime that you report will be treated like it's the most important thing in the world. So I've been very grateful to that. I live in a country that actually.

[A]

Cares about justice and when it comes to her holding onto this for five plus years, did she ever think you get to this point of fame that she would come after you or she just.

[B]

That's what I couldn't understand because five.

[A]

Years ago you were teaching.

[B]

I was a teacher. I taught psychology. I was teaching for like 10 years or so. I was anonymous, I was an anonymous person. I just think that I have no idea what made her record it to begin with. I had no idea what made her hold onto it. But I think I underestimate how much you hold on to a hatred or hold on to an obsession that they have with you. And I could totally understand if she was truly married to this man or they were engaged or they were still together sometimes even if it wasn't like you still have a hatred because.

[A]

Yeah, but it was just a three.

[B]

Month relationship since 20. He had no idea who she is. I can't even remember her.

[A]

And have you decided, have you spoken to the man to be like, why don't you come out and give a statement and that you can use it on your page.

[B]

He's actually online and he's got a big following online and you can see he's never been married or engaged.

[A]

Who is this man? Now that we need a name, unfortunately.

[B]

In Dubai I can't release the name but I will show you secretly. You can see, see. And the man that released all this stuff has done an interview with him. He will never show him or tag him. And the reason he won't show him and tag him because the moment you do tag him, you can go and scroll on his pages, you can see he's single. He vlogs in 2021 that he was single, married and never been married, never been engaged. So the man that released it did an interview with him, blurred out his face, deliberately, never tagged him, never showed anything about the interview because the moment he would do the interview it would get immediately like every, like, but he's not married or engaged and like where did this come from? This doesn't make any sense. So there's a reason why his identity has been hidd and it's not out of privacy, it's not out of respect.

[A]

It's because they would connect the dots.

[B]

They would connect the dots. And more so than anything, this person is online and does like content, fitness content. If you were going to expose people, why wouldn't you expose the actual cheater? He's got hundreds and thousands of followers. Expose the actor. Technically he's the one that cheated. Apparently cheated on his wife or fiance. But he's kept really, really hush hush. I'll show you privately but legally you.

[A]

Can'T say his name. So my question is Saadia, have you thought about maybe reaching out to this guy and saying, hey, why don't we do an Instagram live together?

[B]

When I spoke to him originally he was like, I want nothing to do with this, I'm not involved, I don't know anything. Then he saw it go viral and the moment he saw it go viral, he actually contacted the leak and tried to get himself to go viral to show himself.

[A]

Like why not come on your page and try to.

[B]

He, instead of trying to help me, he tried to stab me in the back thinking he would get famous out of it, he thought. And then when I told him, you know, this is illegal in Dubai, that you're spreading false rumors about somebody you know, immediately he went silent. So then I had to take legal action and now there we have a court proceeding so I have to, I'm in the middle of a legal battle. So he, he's not somebody I could trust to do that because he just wanted his five minutes, realized it's illegal and then withdrew all and charges because he didn't want to get. He doesn't want to, yeah, he doesn't want to get kicked out.

[A]

The other thing that I found fascinating is which you keep private is you're in a really mushle. A happy, successful marriage.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Relationship.

[B]

All praise be to God. I try and I'm so glad I do keep it private because the Internet just designed to just there's a small segment that's the loudest and they just want to destroy, destroy, destroy. So luckily I kept my one thing I'm so grateful for during this time. I didn't mention my family. I don't mention your siblings, my partner, I don't mention my parents. I don't talk about any of them because they didn't sign up for any of this. And also I don't think it's relevant. When I go to a doctor, I don't, when he's giving me medicine, I don't sit there and say, well what was your diet and what did you have for breakfast? Before I take his advice, I just say, give me what works. You know what works. You've studied this, you've worked with patients. Give me the answer. I don't need to do a due diligence on his personal hygiene and his personal life. I just need the answers to my problems. I think it's a strange dynamic online where they need to see your private life before they see your professional outcomes and I just don't think it's even relevant. And I think sometimes what a lot of coaches might do and you know, it's nothing personal and nothing against it, sometimes they kind of advertise their relationship as a way to kind of show.

[A]

Anchor more people in.

[B]

Yeah. Draw people in and try and make it like look more that make their knowledge sound more legitimate. It's simply not related. It's simply not related. You're the only thing that makes you successful at your job is having the qualifications and then having the experience of working with clients in depth and what all praise be to God, I got lucky with is when you're online you get clientele from all over the world. You don't just stick to your local area. So you get to see global patterns of what's going on in relationships at the moment. And because you get that global sample that you get all your information from, your information can resonate with the world. Whereas if I was just practicing in Dubai or just practicing in London, maybe I would just have very London based problems or Dubai based problems. But my clientele is from everywhere. So the common kind of themes I talk about tend to apply worldwide.

[A]

I think what people try and are looking for more and more now just to kind of like I was trying to make logic of it Myself is they're looking for that authenticity. Right. They're like, do you practice what you preach? They say all the time, the doctors are their own worst patients. Right. They don't follow their own advice. I give out health advice. I'm like, you should sleep nine hours a night. I'm sleeping four hours a night. I myself am like, I'm being a hypocrite by this. I'm giving this advice. I know this is what works, is what makes success. So I think when people have pushed that narrative, I think for them it was, well, why not apply it to your own life? But just because somebody's great at giving advice something doesn't mean they can always apply it to their personal relationship.

[B]

Yeah. And you don't know, they might be applying it to their life. They might be actually doing it. I try and do what I talk about and I try and talk about it very fairly. And one of the reasons why my content is quite gender neutral, I'm not like a girl's girl on girl side, or I'm not totally on the men's side. It's neutral. Is because I apply a neutral balance even in my own relationships. I'm very much aware of what I do wrong and what he does wrong. I do wrong, he does wrong. And it's just that I don't have the problems I always talk about. So I talk a lot about, maybe I'll talk about erectile dysfunction or pornography. Doesn't mean I'm going through that. And I don't have to go through that in order to give advice on that. There's some things I just simply can never go through. I will never know what it's like to have erectile dysfunction. Does that mean a doctor who treats people with erectile dysfunction can never get advice on it? Because you have to study it and work with the people and see the outcomes rather than experience it yourself. I don't need a cancer patient to help me move my chemo. Need a doctor. What they're thinking is you need somebody with cancer, has gone through the chemo, got the results. That might work for some people, but in other areas you simply just need somebody who's got the knowledge and experience. And that's where I would say I come in more.

[A]

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[B]

There's way too much pollution online on what they should be looking for. So what ends up happening is similarity feels like settling when really it's exactly what they should be going for. And what I mean BY that is 10, 20, 30 years ago, people would meet somebody that they went to college with, they would be very similar in terms of appearance, they'd be very similar in terms of social economic status and very similar in education. And that's the person they'd marry and that's the person they'd have kids with and it would just flow. Now they're thinking, okay, this person might be similar to looks wise, but I need a 10 out of 10 Instagram baddie. That's what I look for. Or a girl will see a guy that maybe same level of income as her, same education. So but I need a provider. I need someone super successful. I need to be traveling to Europe every summer. So they've got these standards that they've kind of got from Instagram and TikTok and applying it to their little world, which just simply doesn't apply. The standards that they're collecting are like celebrity standards that they're applying in their local environment. And so that's why they're struggling, because there's a mismatch between what their expectations are and what they can truly access. And because It's a mismatch. They'd rather stay single because they think meeting someone means settling. And really that's their level. And they haven't realized that.

[A]

You also talk a lot about like, high value men and high value women, right? So let's talk about that for a second because it goes back to the segment of people misaligning with what they're actually looking for. So what is a high value woman?

[B]

I would say a high value woman is a woman that basically you can't truly access high value without certain traits. First thing, of course, to be as attractive as you can doesn't mean you have to be a supermodel. It just means you take care of yourself. So whatever you are, you manage to take care of your hair, you do your makeup, you look after your clothing, you are in shape, you take care, you fulfill your potential in terms of appearance, in terms of your relationship with men, you have a really easy ability to reject male attention and reject men more than you do accept them. And what I mean by that is if you are unable to reject men that are bad for you, you cannot be high value. If you're a woman that's constantly dating narcissists, constantly dating aggressive men, constantly dating men that are bad for you, and then you're claiming to be high value, then your choices are not high value. So you have to have an ability to kind of reject men that are not good for you. And the main thing I would say is that you give as good as you get. And what I mean by that is so many women, especially online now, they think being high value is just existing. And a man just pay for her life, gives her everything and she's feminine by just breathing, and that's what makes her feminine. I would say that you cannot be high value if you don't bring to the table exactly what you expect in return. So if you are, you know, not very educated, not very hardworking, not very driven, you don't cook, you don't clean, you don't do any skills whatsoever, you're not high value. You're actually a cheap commodity. Maybe you're just beautiful, you're replaceable, you're replaceable, you might be beautiful, but beauty fades. And more so than anything, beauty is totally replaceable. But if you are someone who is really intelligent, really built your career, built your own success, really confident, got all those great things going for you, and you expect the exact same in return, then you're extremely high value. Whereas if you built nothing but expect a lot in return, you're delusional or narcissistic. And I think there's a fine line between the two.

[A]

What about, what would you say for women who are not really well groomed or not really beautiful, but are with these incredible men and you're looking at them being like, how did that happen? I sometimes come across women like that. I'm like, what value? Not just because of looks, but what weight are you actually carrying versus the guy might be an 8 out of 10.

[B]

I think when you see a very attractive man with an unattractive woman and successful and successful with unattractive women who have let themselves go, whatever it is, usually he's with her because she accepts unacceptable behavior. Whenever a woman is punching above her weight, she is far more tolerant of bad behavior and she's far more codependent where. And so she's more likely to forgive bad behavior. She's more likely to accept him maybe being unfaithful, maybe doing all of those things. She's a little bit more accepting of his bad behavior. Whereas when a man is super attractive but dates within his league somebody just as attractive as him, he actually has to behave in a way that she will tolerate because she's got alternatives. She's got so many alternatives, even if it's just being by herself, she's okay with that. Whereas codependent, unattractive women are okay, don't mind you doing anything as long as you stay with them. So I think that looks imbalance actually makes women far more loyal and more tolerant and that's why they stay there because they know that no other woman would allow that freedom that you probably gets with the woman that's not as, not on the same level as him.

[A]

And then what about high value men? What is your description of that?

[B]

I would say just a couple of things. Number thing is self, number one thing is self control. So he has the ability to control how he spends his money, how he spends his body. He doesn't, you know, he controls what he eats, he controls who he sleeps with. He's got a lot of self control in that area and lots of discipline. The second thing I would say is that he's a really strong problem solver. With every problem he finds a solution rather than just gets weak and gets emotional and doesn't know what to do about it and get gets stuck. He's just a natural problem solver. And the final thing I would say is that he's a good decision maker. He makes decisions that benefit not just him, but maybe his partner as well. He takes her opinion into account and then makes an executive decision. And because he's a good problem solver with self control and a great decision maker, women follow his lead. But if he's not a good decision maker, can't solve any problems and has zero self control, he's just a mess. He's just. And women eventually will lose respect for a man like that.

[A]

That I also think I want to add on to that. In my opinion. Tell me if I'm wrong or not. I think a high value man is also understanding his role, that he has to be a provider.

[B]

Yes, absolutely.

[A]

That is non negotiable. That is a man's role.

[B]

I do agree that a man's role is to be a provider, but I think the western world is he be a provider while she does nothing.

[A]

No, that's not what I'm saying at all.

[B]

Not at all. But you know what the western way they see it as you be a provider but we're not going to be feminine, we're not going to cook, we're not going to clean, we're not going to do anything feminine. What's on going whatsoever. But you'd be super, super masculine. When you're a provider for a woman that does nothing for you, you actually become a simp is what they call it. You actually become very submissive. But when you're a provider for a woman who's a great woman, great asset.

[A]

Runs a great house, raises great kids, can emotionally take care of you, lead.

[B]

You, help you, support you, absolutely doesn't humiliate you, actually makes you look good, then you're actually masculine. But being a provider for the wrong women actually makes you very submissive. So the reason I try not to mention provider when I talk about high value is that until you speak, select wisely. Your provision can either make you kind of very pathetic or it can make you very masculine. It just depends on your selection process. And if you select badly and you're still a provider, you're actually very submissive and weak. But if you select well and provider, you're very masculine and strong. So just the, the female selection is a key component.

[A]

And it's so funny you're saying that because us as South Asian or Middle Eastern or Asian women are taught this more. Yes way if you're describing it right, if a man's going out there and providing, then you have your roles and responsibilities as well. You have to look a certain way, you have to carry the weight, wait for the family, raise beautiful children who are, you know, have the right values and carry the family values through versus you're saying more. In the west they're kind of taught this, kind of like you just have to go out and pay the bills and I can do nothing.

[B]

Yeah. We've got this idea that being nurturing is not a bad thing. We weren't raised where nurturing is seen as an insult. So. And it doesn't mean we're maids or anything like that. It's just that you take a joy and it's not feeding your man or feeding. It's your children or your pride in.

[A]

How your house and your family and your husband.

[B]

Absolutely. You like the things clean. You like when people come to your house, it's food ready. You're big feeders. Like in our culture, if anyone comes to your house, doors are always open, doors over. It doesn't mean you have to cook, but there's food ready for people, it can be ordered or whatever it is. You're a nurturer by design and it's never seen as an insult. Whereas in the western world being a nurturer is seen as being a bit pathetic. And it's been as a pick me or it's a bit like pathetic. Whereas we don't really believe in this kind of narcissistic way where people just look after us and we do nothing in return. We see it as a balance and that's how children are raised. They see two people equally contributing to a healthy home. Whereas I think the Western or the TikTok way is one person contributes and then one does nothing and then the entitlement just grows and grows and I don't think it's particularly healthy. Or it could be the other way where the man just loses all masculinity, doesn't provide, doesn't do anything for the woman and expects her to get married, do the bills and do the cooking around the house. And that's also a mismatch. It just has to be an equality of what you bring to the table.

[A]

And when it comes to, you know, high value women, there is. They tend not to necessarily be submissive. Right. So when a high value woman meets another man and where does submission part come in? Or it's not submissive at all, in my opinion, it may not be submissive at all. It's a partnership.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely. I think that what happens with really intelligent high value women, they're not submissive. They just know when to delegate and there's a big difference. They're not just going to blindly say, yes sir, no sir, and agree with everything. They just know when he knows what he's doing and when he needs a bit of guidance. There's a balance and then there's a quality. So if he's a really great decision maker, knows exactly what he's doing, she has it handled, no problem. But there's always areas that men can't fulfill. There are always. There's going to be parts where they don't get it right. She's not going to be submissive and just say, well, he's a man so he should know if he's going to drive you off a cliff, she's going to take the steering wheel. And I think part of a strong man would understand that. You need a wife that will take the steering wheel when you're going off the off a cliff. Whereas weaker men just say, why are you challenging me? Why are you challenging me?

[A]

They get insecure.

[B]

They get insecure. So the submission should be a natural outcome of his good decision making. But wherever he can't make the good decisions, she actually has to step up if she wants to be, make sure the household is kept in a healthy direction.

[A]

And for women that are, you know, questioning their intuition to be like, when do I step into that role versus when do I let him lead?

[B]

When you feel like his decision making is worse than yours, when it's not as good as yours, feel free to step in and look out for him. Yeah. And it doesn't have to be disrespectful. It's just like, babe, I've seen this before. Don't do this. Or I know this. Yeah, I know this guy. He's got bad intentions or this guy was making a pass at me. I don't think you should trust him, whatever it is, is. But when you think that he's got the right, he's got it handled, you let him. So I would say if you can see the outcome faster than he can, feel free to step in. And one of the things that makes women lose respect, if she's constantly seeing the outcome better than he is, if she's constantly a better decision maker, then she'll lose respect. But if on the whole he tends to be a good decision maker, but you have to step in here and there, that's normal.

[A]

Do you agree with the fact that I think all women subconsciously, strong or otherwise, want a man to lead the them?

[B]

I think they do. I think they. Why they want a man to lead them is because they are genuinely always, when, especially when they become mothers, they are constantly thinking about other people. They're constantly thinking about when who's going to eat, what time they're going to sleep, what they're constantly worried about, especially when they have children. But even if they don't have children, it's their parents, their siblings, they're worried about other people. When they have a husband that worries about them and their well being, they can feel balanced. Yeah, they can finally feel balanced. But it is if then he's another person that they have to constantly worry about, stress about. And this doesn't relieve them of any of their stresses. They get disrespectful because they just feel like it's an added stress rather than a stress relief. And they do get really disrespectful, unfortunately.

[A]

But there's this creator online that I follow and he says this thing about soy boys. Do you know what soy boys are? They're estrogen dominant men. So I have been going through life being like, what happened to the world that now we have all these estrogen dominant men roaming around these men who have really female attributes and traits and the women are having to be forced to step further into their masculine because these men are not doing their job well.

[B]

I think that a lot of it comes from therapy. And I'm saying this as a therapist myself. Therapy has been dominated by either women that are teaching men or very feminine men that teach men that the only way to kind of make a marriage work is you totally submit to the woman, you totally understand her needs, you totally be as kind and caring. You talk about your feelings all day, every day. Feelings, feelings, feelings. That's not actually what makes women respect men. They don't want a man that's going to sit there and cry about his dad being a narcissist all day. What they want to know is what are you going to do about it? Whatever problem you have, take actionable steps. That's all they care about. They might say that they care about your childhood and they really worry about it. Every woman does for five minutes. And then we want to get on with it. What are you going to do about it? So you might have had a childhood where you were neglected and as a result you overate and now you're really, really over weight. Cool. What are you going to do about it? Is what the woman is thinking unconsciously. Or you had a childhood where you were neglected and you started turning to a little bit pornography and now you go become an addict. No problem. What are you going to do about it? Now therapy instead says that's invalidating my feelings. You should worry about my feelings. That's for women. No problem. She can dwell on her feelings, but from a man's perspective, if your therapist is encouraging you to constantly worry about your feelings, constantly talk about your childhood, constantly blame your father for everything instead of thinking, no problem, but what am I going to do about it? Then your therapist is leading you down this very emasculating role. And so that's not helped by the influx of TikTok and Instagram Reels, which basically show a man submitting to a woman online. And all the women will praise it. But, oh my God, that's so amazing. Oh, I want a man like this. Where do I find a man like this? But the moment they find a really feminized man and they date a feminist kind of man, they lose sexual attraction. There's something so unsexy about it. So you might feel safe and you might feel like he's like your little therapist. And you could. They're discussing things all day, but that's.

[A]

What you're looking for out of you.

[B]

Don'T feel sexy, you don't feel attracted, you don't feel dominated. And these traits are actually quite essential in life.

[A]

You use the word dominated. What does that mean when you look for a partner? And why is domination sexy?

[B]

It's super, super, super sexy in women. Because I've worked with so many women and the number one trait that they're craving in a man is dominance. And dominance is seen is almost like an abusive word. It's not in that way, especially when it comes to, to intimacy. One of the biggest complaints I find from women these days is their partner doesn't initiate intimacy and he's not dominant and he's very submissive, intimately. That for some reason makes women feel super, super unseen. They actually crave a man that will let. What we mean by dominant is not abusive, it's not controlling. It's simply a case of he has no problem letting her know that he's into you, that he's into you, that he's interested, that he finds you beautiful, that he finds you attractive, he's super, super into you. And the other thing is he has no problem letting you know that having an emotional outburst doesn't mean I'm going to submit. I'll submit when it's reasonable. What submissive men will do is whether she's being reasonable or unreasonable will just become submissive. Just say, oh, no, I know we need a prenup, but I'm not going to talk about it because she Might get upset or I know we need to, you know, spend more time with my family. We only see them once a year, but she doesn't like my mom, so we're never going to go see my mum. What they actually respect is a man that will say, listen, I completely understand you and my mom don't get on, but I've got to take the kids once in a while. We got to go see them. It's important for them. Or I completely understand that you're having a bit of an emotional breakdown, but doesn't mean this is good for you. Let's just get the results. They want the outcomes. So I think what's happened is dominance is seen as an ugly word when really it's what women truly respond to. Which is why we see so many women ending up with really narcissistic and really toxic men. Because they almost would rather a dominant strong man than a submissive weak man. And that's why they end up in this kind of choice between the two nice and too narcissistic. And you see them kind of drawn more towards a narcissistic than too nice and then have the wounds and then end up going to the nice guy. So it's almost like we'd almost choose the trauma of a negative dominant man than just complete weak and submissive men.

[A]

Have you been seeing the news online about Brooklyn Beckham having this pushback with his family? So this kind of feeds into that a little bit. So what's your take on it?

[B]

Can I ask your take? Yeah, what's your take on it?

[A]

I just. From the little. I don't know that much about it. So kind of my take on it would be that he is dominated by his wife. And yes, he's had differences with his family, but we're South Asian, right? So for us. Plus your parents are extremely opinionated. They always have an opinion and you have to play the game with your in laws. That's how I was raised, right? And in my ex marriage I was very close to my in law. So they have their opinions, they give feedback. They're a little pushy at times, but you take it right. You work in that family ecosystem and you're like, this is an extension of my family. So that's that what I saw. It's been blowing up obviously on TikTok and Fox News and everybody posted about it that Brooklyn Beckham has come out and basically said that his family is extremely pushy, they're intrusive, they are trying to manipulate him and they have been really pushy about certain things since their wedding, since they were assigning their all going as far as to say when the first dance was happening, Victoria was wanted the first dance first and she cancelled the wedding dress. All the stuff that I'd be like, listen, if my oldest son is getting married, I should damn well have the first.

[B]

And I'm a designer as well. And I completely agree. Sorry, can I. Yeah, finish. Can I please.

[A]

No, no, no, go for it.

[B]

I completely, completely agree. And I think where we're eastern, we've got a completely different perspective. And I'm so glad we're eastern. Yeah. Because we. Just.

[A]

Because I feel bad for Victoria, I'm.

[B]

Like, girl, I 100%. Because what I couldn't believe is this man has probably lived the most privileged life a human being can live. Your father is the most successful football player in the world as a boy.

[A]

And his mom was a spice girl.

[B]

And she's the best. And I'm obsessed with. And this is not me being biased. People say like, oh, but money doesn't buy happiness. Yes, it does. It does buy a lot of happiness.

[A]

It bought him comfort, it bought him stability in a lot of ways.

[B]

And the thing is, it's not just a rich man, it's a footballer. So you get to all football matches, you get to live a boy's dream. Now, if he said in his statement, my parents have always been abusive, always. He never said manipulating and controlling. It was all about my wife, my wife, what they did to my wife. My wife, my wife. They even said, my wife's not blood. She's not blood. That's not.

[A]

That is true.

[B]

That is true. She's not blood. That's not a bad thing or a good thing. It just is. So what it sounded like is that he is very clearly controlled and manipulated. If he had said, it's got nothing about Nicola and you just said, my relationship with my parents are strained because of business deals in the past or this, I would kind of understand it. But it's all about what Nicola's voice is just living in his head and he's just the mouthpiece and it's so ungrateful and entitled and what I think is worse. And this is where men are going to get again. This is why men are so weak. They're going to see a bunch of girls on TikTok saying, yes, Brooklyn, take a stand up for your wife, your wife, your wife. So they're going to think, oh, I should stand up for my wife all the time. So they become bitches. To their wives now. And that's, that's the cycle that happens on TikTok. They take a toxic relationship, they highlight the woman that's in power, they say that's what they want and then men follow suit and then end up being weak.

[A]

I was just listening to the whole thing and what you're just saying right now. He would not even be in a position to marry Nicola if he wasn't Brooklyn Beckham.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

He would never even have the chance. I'm like, you're shitting on the people that made you who you are.

[B]

The fact that he would say that they keep reaching out to me. You're lucky they're your parents, of course.

[A]

They care about you. So I was.

[B]

Wouldn't you reach out to your son for the rest of his life? Life, I would literally on my deathbed be reaching out to my child.

[A]

So when I read some of those things and about the first dance and the dress, I was just like mortified. I was like, either I'm unhinged, which, fine, you guys can think I'm unhinged. And I was like, or it's culturally what we think is the right thing to do. These are your in laws. This is an extension to the man that you love, therefore you marry into the family.

[B]

On the way here, I was just thinking, if my brother did that to my mother, I think I'd be mortified. He's upset that they tagged him and I feel I would murder him if he did that to my mum online or my parents or anything like that. I would hate a man that totally takes, even as a wife. I would hate, hate my husband to totally take my side over his mom. Because then I would think if you can't, if you, if I can manipulate you, anyone can manipulate you, you're just a bitch. Whereas if you can stand up to me, stand up to her, do what's right, do your own opinion, then I will respect you. And sometimes you have to upset me in the process. No problem. What the western way is, especially the TikTok world, is if you upset your wife, you're right wrong. When really, if you stand up for what's right, you have to upset people. That's normal. So I just found it so staged and such a, such a shame that you could do that to your parents so publicly. Publicly.

[A]

And I think the joke today was they're like, he got a, he got a, you know, a card out of Prince Harry's book.

[B]

Yeah, I know, I understand. And so I just, I've worked with Thousands of men, thousands of clients of men, literally thousands. Any man that's had to fight with his parents to be with his wife or neglect his family to be with his wife is miserable, is miserable. Because a good healthy woman would say to you, no matter what the situation, you need your parents. You need your parents. That's what rational women do. Irrational women are like, if you speak to your family, don't speak to me. So they sign up to a lifetime of misery and they don't realize it yet. I promise you, every single time you have to cut off family times, man or woman, even women, when they cut off their family to be with their husband, you will live to regret it. Because healthy partners want what's best for you, not what's best for them. And cutting off your family is never.

[A]

It'S never part of the equation. So it's funny you're saying that when I met my, my husband, he wasn't maybe as close to his parents. That when I left the marriage because I was very close to my in laws and I went out of my way to make sure that we functioned as a full family unit, they lived with us. And I would always tell him I was like, the more successful you are, the better you can take care of them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so that should be your goal. Not just worrying about me. Don't worry about me for a second. But remember that you have to take care of your parents.

[B]

Oh, that's beautiful. I completely, and that's what I can't understand in the western world they see that as competition. I keep, see tiktoks of like mom comes on the wedding day and wants to take.

[A]

But that's his mother.

[B]

When you become a mom, you will do the exact same. And then you will do the exact same. And also like I'm not in competition with my mother in law. Like I don't, we're not in the same lane. And I want him to have a loving, happy relationship with them. So I think that, you know, she.

[A]

Will always be the first woman in his life and you should never for a split second even think to replace that.

[B]

Yeah, you should. And of course there's some men that take it too far and they complete mummy's boys. And they are very, very difficult. Difficult.

[A]

And that is toxic.

[B]

That is toxic as well. But the issue there is not his love for his mom, it's his inability to make his own decisions. It's when he becomes brainwashed and that's what's unattractive. So the love for his mom is not an issue. Never the issue. It's the brainwashing that's the issue. So as a man, if you're brainwashed by mum or brainwashed by wife, you're gonna always be weak. Whereas if you're not brainwashed by either, but you know how to balance it, it's an incredible skill.

[A]

I also recently saw a video that I wanted to talk about. It was one of your reels that went viral and it kind of brings me to this topic. You posted a reel that said women don't care about height, looks or even money. That what they really care about is a man's intelligence. Especially how easy or difficult it is to trick that man.

[B]

Yes, absolutely.

[A]

Okay, so let's talk about that because it's a playoff on what we're talking about.

[B]

Yes. What I said in that is that there's only one thing all women want and that is a man that they can never manipulate in any way, shape or form. You can be taller, more attractive, richer, all of those great things. But if she can trick you and manipulate you, she automatically lose respect. And what I mean by this is I've worked with really successful men in Miami, Dubai, everywhere. And these men have businesses, some of them have banks, some of them have construction companies, whatever it is. Super, super successful men. And they're a lot older than the woman, so far more intelligent on paper. But when she's able to say, oh, I lost my wallet, can you replace my Cartier? And you do it straight away. Or if she says, oh, I'm just going to go visit my ex, I just need to, you know, go tell him off about something and you let her do it. Or if she can ghost you for two, three days straight and you believe that she just fell asleep in the middle of the night, or if you don't ask her where these, you know, where these really Rolex is coming from when she's never worked a day in her life, you don't ask questions and you don't connect the dots and you don't realize things automatically, she will lose attraction and respect for you. We cannot love, respect, be in love with a man that we can manipulate because the moment we can, we don't trust his decision making and we don't trust that he can protect us because he's not protective enough. If I can leave you on read for three, four days, come back out of nowhere, if I can still keep in touch with my ex and you don't think anyone, anything suspicious about that, or if I post really provocatively and you have no concerns whatsoever about that. I automatically assume you're not protective. And when you're not protective, I can't love and respect you because I need a man that can protect me. Whereas if you are, even if you're less intelligent, you're not strong or you're not doing so well, but you are smart. You can put two and two together. You realize when I'm trying to my cheeks and play you for a fall and you catch it quick, automatically she gains respect and.

[A]

But what if the guy is really smart and savvy and can figure things out but he's not a provider, he's not a natural. Okay, he might be a slight protector, but he's not a provider. Right. He can call your bullshit, but he can't actually take care of you in a financial sense or in an emotional sense. Then how would that be handled?

[B]

That can only work if the woman is so financially successful herself. So you'll see the Mariah Carey's of the world, you'll see Madonna do it. And they cover up that mistake and they cover up that mistake because they can provide. Providing. It's not ideal, but they're looking for something different. Then, then they're just looking for somebody that they're super attracted to and they can enjoy it. But when she is not financially stable herself, she will constantly, constantly pick up the same problem. Same problem. Same problem. Why aren't you providing? Why aren't you providing? Why aren't you providing? So I think it doesn't actually work and it doesn't mean he has to be rich. It just means that he has to have a generosity in his nature. So he wants to provide for. And the main thing that puts women off is not actually him being able to provide or not provide. It's him being comfortable with her being the provider. It's him not fighting for the bill, it's him just letting her get everything. It's that comfort that he has with somebody else paying for everything for him that makes him feel sassy, kind of like feminine. And that, that's what puts women off a lot.

[A]

But then don't you think that throws off like gender roles and what it means to really be a high value woman or a high value man?

[B]

In what way can you like for.

[A]

Example, if you are with a man that is, is catching out your but is okay with you paying the bills and is okay for you to have this role, then he's not using his.

[B]

Intelligence in all the right ways.

[A]

Right?

[B]

So the problem is he's got it great in one area, but he hasn't got it in the other areas where you should be think using that smarts to also help you make progress yourself further. To progress yourself further. So in that case, the women. The reason why women don't like that, after a while it just feels like a security guard. You're watching me, you're telling me I can't do this. You're like a bouncer. Yeah. You're like a bouncer. Rather than a provider.

[A]

Rather than a provider.

[B]

Yeah. So when you're just being protective and you're just watching all of those things, but you're not providing for her, then you come across controlling and possessive. Whereas when you're doing that but then also providing for her, then you come across as you're just a strong man who knows how to look after women.

[A]

So if you had to step back and say, which one comes first is the guy who is really witty and can catch your bullshit, or the guy maybe doesn't catch everything you do, but still has a backbone but is still a provider, what would it be for women?

[B]

I think it would still be the. They still need the provider because they can't have children. Children. That's the main thing, is that without the children, they'll have a better. They might have a better intimacy life with the first one. They might have more fun with the first one. They might respect the first one better. But in the long run, even if they have to compromise the kind of respect and all that stuff, but to start a family, they need to always pick that. They'll have so much anxiety having a baby with a man that just can't provide. Yeah. It's a field with anxiety.

[A]

So that was my kind of takeaway when I saw this reel and I was like, I really want to sit down and ask Sadia, because there's one trump the other when put back to back. And I would think, yeah, absolutely.

[B]

One puts. When it comes to children. Yeah. Because we're on a timeline when it comes to children. And you simply cannot keep providing when pregnant kids, everything. It's just too much for a woman.

[A]

Do you think all women should just want to get married and have children?

[B]

No, I don't think so at all. I think there's so many other ways to enjoy your life in this day and age. There's so many successful ways that you could do it. But what I do think is that at some stage in your life, you will crave loving and looking after something unconditionally. I think every other relationship in your life either your timeline, because your parents are older than you and they die a lot younger, or men can let you down, women can let you down. Children is one area in your life where you can just love them unconditionally and there's no regret in that. Whereas loving people unconditionally, sometimes you can live to regret it. So I do think that it's not essential for everybody. There's so many great ways to live your life with or without children, especially in this day and age. But if you are a natural carer and lover, then you are designed to be a parent. If it comes naturally to you. If you're not nurturing, nurturing and you're not loving and you're actually quite selfish. Absolutely. There's so many better ways for you to spend your time than having a child.

[A]

You know, I also see in same same sex marriages that there's a, a role of a masculine and feminine, but also in same sex marriages, people have the desire to have children and raise those children and have that family unit.

[B]

Yeah, it's, it's biological needs. Biological. It is totally, totally biological. But like you were saying earlier, the person you have it with is super, super important. And I would honestly say it's better to have it with somebody that you're not madly in love with, but you can have a good friendship with than someone you're crazy about, but you're toxic and it can go back and forth. Just have it with a safe person. If what, because we live in a world where divorce is so ripe, just having it with somebody for worst case scenario, you could still be friends, you could still be amicable, you could still co parent really well, choose that person to have kids with. But if it's the love of your life, but you're really, really intense and it can get really ugly at times.

[A]

Stability isn't there to have a family.

[B]

Don't have the family.

[A]

How long have you been married?

[B]

Four years. Yeah.

[A]

And what were the things about the men that you decided to marry that were check, check, check for you? Because you're really successful, you're independent, you're all these things as well that you're like, okay, this is the person I want to settle down with.

[B]

You know what? If I'm being totally honest, it's more the fact that I have a very volatile nature. Even though I come across very calm, cool and collect, I do get really upset very quickly. I am very reactive, I'm very confrontational, all of those things. I'm very like that, just a feisty woman. But when you're around somebody that removes that from you and it reduces that completely because either they don't trigger it or even when you do get triggered, they don't ignite it. It doesn't make it worse. It just recognizes. It's like kind of like a child having a tantrum. And you stay calm in those moments, but you train her to kind of become more calm, self aware. You're an adult, you don't need to talk like this, you don't need to act like this. You don't need to be so confrontational. I think help him removing that trait from me, helping me remove that trait, it's not totally gone, but helping him remove that trait and replace it with more rational way of thinking made me realize that this is kind of the person I want to be. The person that he wants me to be is also the person I want to be. So when you're around somebody that makes you a better person, for me personally, it really helps. And also just the fact that I just didn't get those. I was very, very anxious person. I'm very suspicious, especially the work I do. I'm so, so suspicious that men cheat, men do this, men do that. Always, always hyper aware. But when you're with someone that you never know in life, anyone can do anything, but they don't make you feel like that on a daily basis. That suspicious, anxious, worried. I don't have any of those experiences which I thought was impossible. There's something in their energy or their behavior that calms you rather than ignites you. I just thought this is probably best for me.

[A]

I think what you're describing is a very safe nervous system around this.

[B]

That's the main thing.

[A]

And I say this to my friends all the time. If you meet somebody and get butterflies, run from that person. As a regulated woman, you want to look for a man that soothes your nervous system, makes you feel safe completely.

[B]

And I remember the first time I'd gone like maybe two, three hours because normally I'm very anxious. Would check where the person is. You have an anxious attachment, incredibly. And then I remember it would been like four or five hours and he hadn't replied for some reason and no part of me was anxious. Normally I'd be like checking to see where they're online, who they're talking to, what they go. I remember thinking, huh? How come I didn't even notice? And then I would just call and then I'd go, oh shit, I'm so sorry. I was in a meeting, I'll call you in a minute. Blah, blah. And I remember thinking in any other situation, my mind would be racing. Here I just, I'm so calm for whatever reason that I just like the person I'm becoming. What made you choose your partner at the time? Do you mind me asking?

[A]

You know what? At the time, the reason I chose my partner was because I was looking for a sense of family.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I came from a broken home. My parents were extremely volatile and I had met my mother in law. Two months of me, me into me dating my ex husband. And I loved her and I loved this family and I loved what they represented. And even though he wasn't very close to them at the time, I love them as human beings. And I said even though at the time. And you know, this is what I'm gonna get to. People never really change.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The man you meet is the man you marry is a man who's always gonna be.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Men don't change. Women drastically evolve over the course of their life. So you're delusional to think you're gonna get into this marriage. He's gonna change. He's not. Yeah. But I think at the time I. I was seeking family. That's a big theme for me. And that's also the reason I moved to Dubai, is to be closer to family.

[B]

Amazing.

[A]

And so at the time, you know, living in the States, I'd been on my own for quite some time. And I love that his sisters lived there, his parents were coming and going, and it was Daisy. Same language, same culture. They understood my background. And we always gravitate to what's familiar to us. Right. And so that sense of home is what I've been searching for. But the older that I've gotten, the work that I've done on myself, I realize a sense of home comes within me. And then you can create family in a different way.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And there's some things I just couldn't. We're just not adding up.

[B]

And do you mind me asking if there was any deal breakers that just Was your fault?

[A]

100%. The older that I got. I have a very conservative mindset. I believe that a man needs to be a provider and a protector. And I was running amok, working seven days a week, which I still do. And I was getting exhausted, sadly. I know I was constantly at work. I was tired and. And I felt that I had to take the lead a lot. I had to lead the marriage, I had to direct the marriage.

[B]

Were you just more intelligent? Are you just.

[A]

I wouldn't say that I think I just have a really high drive for things and a really different way how I look at the world, and I'm a big dreamer, and I see the world in techno colors versus he seems we're a little bit more limited. So maybe my ambitions are higher or my desire for a certain type of life is higher. And I was like, well, I'll go do that myself. I'll go get that life for myself. And I think that in order to be in a healthy relationship for me, I need a partner who's like, I got it. You can calm down for a minute. You can relax for a minute. You don't need to be doing 100 things, 100 miles an hour, and you.

[B]

Can even take some time off for a minute. It's no problem. But you just couldn't get out of that race when you were the safety. The safety.

[A]

You need to create that safety for a woman to be like, you can lead me.

[B]

So it wasn't even like a bad person or anything.

[A]

It's just that you're really good friends, and we're business partners.

[B]

Do you think that it's because you're an overachiever, or is it because he's just slow? Is it just you just happen to be an overachiever?

[A]

I think it's a mix of both things. I don't think he's slow. I think he's incredible for the right woman, right?

[B]

Yeah, he's a great person.

[A]

He's a great person. He would be an incredible partner for the right woman.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I am meant for something different. And I think it's understanding and realizing that and being really honest about, like, we are not a fit, because you cannot change someone who they are. Their baseline is their baseline.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely.

[A]

My baseline is my baseline. And I think it was one of these Mel Robin clips that I watch, and she said, the worst thing that you can do to a relationship is having to force yourself to fit in a box that you don't belong in and to dull down your dreams, because over time, you just become resentful.

[B]

And did you have a particular dream that you were.

[A]

I have a dream of having a very successful, ambitious life for myself. But I also have a vision of how I'd like to raise my kids. I was raised from a really prominent family. I lost all my wealth growing up because my parents didn't leave anything for me. But I always had this drive to accomplish, to achieve, to live a certain way. And that comfort is something that's important for me to Give to my children.

[B]

Right, okay.

[A]

And those value systems, it's super important.

[B]

I know that people like.

[A]

And that's not being materialistic. That's like, I'm used to comfort and a certain quality of life. Why would I not want to give that to my children?

[B]

And especially, look, I preach a lot. I've got lots of family values and I'm very anti materialism and stuff like that, like in terms of being a gold digger and stuff. But at the same time, there is so much comfort in life when you're successful. It's unbelievable how much comfort because you can do nice things for others. You can literally be like, dad, you can get it, kids, you can get it. It's the generosity ignites in you. Whereas when you don't have that, your generosity is limited. And I. If you're anything like from our culture, when you're not able to be generous, you feel like you're not able to be yourself. So I think it's a really important trait to have in yourself and it all does.

[A]

And I also think we shouldn't be shaming women for thinking financial security and stability is a bad thing.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely.

[A]

Why should we? Because, you know, what ended up happening to me is I'm living so out of design because I'm pushing myself seven days a week. It's not like I'm lazy. I'm like, you are going to do everything, I'm going to do nothing. I'm building two companies, I'm traveling the world, I'm putting myself out there, I am hustling and I'm like, if I'm doing all of this, where are you meeting me in that race? So I remember when I met my ex husband husband and we talked about this towards the end of our marriage. I said, you're not there yet, but I'm willing to build a life with you. But I need a partner who's going to catch when I throw.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because I'm really smart, I'm quick on the uptake. I'm emotionally intelligent, I can read a room really quickly. I need a partner that I can work with, that we can build that life together. I don't expect you to give me that life, but grow that life with me. So when I felt that he couldn't catch is where I was like, I'm always going to be left carrying the ball by myself up this hill.

[B]

And is it hard to find a man that can catch, like, with where you're at?

[A]

I think in my 40s, now that I'm 42, I will look for somebody, a partner who's already there in his life and career. I'm not going to be building you from the ground up.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

By your mid-40s. Yeah. If you haven't figured it out, I'm definitely not the partner for you. Right. Because I figured it out for myself.

[B]

And you don't mind if he's got kids or anything like that now. It's not at all.

[A]

You have to be realistic. That's the other thing. Women have these unrealistic checkboxes of all the things that need think. You have to be clear about who you are, your value systems. Right. And what you're able to tolerate and not tolerate. In my 40s, most likely 90% of the time, maybe even 80% of the time, and you would maybe know better than me. I will meet men who've been divorced or have children previously and maybe young kids, maybe old kids. And I'm totally fine to be a stepmom. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

It's not a problem at all. And the other thing I would say, if he gets to his mid-40s and he's never been married and never been.

[A]

That's a red dog.

[B]

No kids at all. Especially for men. I know they think, oh, but women without kids. But men without kids, what happens with them is they get lost in girls a lot, whereas kids kind of grounds them. But if you don't get. If they don't have kids, they really, really follow their desires a lot. Women without kids, they don't really have that issue. Whereas men without kids, they get lost. You'll see them at 35, 36, 37, still in strip clubs, still paying for sex, still on these porn sites, still on these dating apps. They get really lost in women. Women are such a big. One of the things, community, we've got friends, family. We find pleasure in something outside of men. They literally can't find pleasure in something outside of us. And money. Those are the only two things. And one of the things I find fascinating with working with so many clients is when I speak to women who get hit 50, if they meet a man, great. If they don't, they don't care. They're totally fine either way. Men will get to 70 and still thinking, where do I meet women?

[A]

Where can I go to find somebody? Where can I go to get laid?

[B]

You're going to die. What do you want a woman for? And they're like, please help me find a woman. I'm like, no. And so they just can't live without us. And I don't know what it is. They are obsessed with women up until a really old age. So when I see all these incels online are attacking women, women this, women this. They're obsessed with us. If you knew how much the porn industry makes, how much OnlyFans makes, how much strip clubs make. Men will pay and pay and pay to be anywhere near their ego stroked. Anything near a woman. Women don't pay anything to be around men. There's some women addicted to porn, but even then they're watching women more than they're watching men. So they're. They have an obsession with us and it doesn't go. Whereas for women, take it or leave it after a certain age, as long as they're happy or they're successful, they got friends or they got kids, they actually take it or leave it with men.

[A]

There's also a lot of research that suggests that men after the age of 40 that are not in a relationship, one in three or one in five, it's something like that will turn to some sort of negative behavior and addiction.

[B]

Yes, absolutely.

[A]

Versus women will not.

[B]

Yeah, Isn't that incredible? But I definitely see that they just don't find. They don't find enjoyment. They don't have purpose, they don't have enjoyment. And I say this even with my own parents. My father loves, loves, loves his kids, but he needs my mom all the time. My mom can go on holiday, she'll leave him for a month, she won't feel anything. There's something about us where we genuinely find joy in so many other things than them. They're a bit limited. It's not a bad thing or a good thing. I think it's how we design to keep us together. Is he. Especially as they age, they really crave a woman.

[A]

I think a man's natural design, and you tell me what you think about this, is to provide and protect. Whether it's to provide and protect for a family, a wife, children, a company, that is their role. So when they don't have anybody to provide and protect for, they feel loved. Women are natural nurturers. But because. Just because we're not in marriage doesn't mean we don't have friends. We don't have, you know, nieces and nephews and, you know, grandkids, whatever it may be. So we find ability to nurture.

[B]

Yeah, we find that fulfills us.

[A]

But when a man does not have somebody or something to provide and protect for it, they feel very lost.

[B]

Absolutely. I think that's a really great observation because one of the things I've noticed about every man I've worked with that experienced depression, the main thing that they're experiencing is not a lifestyle that, that's awful. They don't have anyone to provide and protect for. They don't have a purpose in that world. So what happens is that because they don't fulfill, because they don't provide and protect, they don't fulfill their potential as a man. So either they're not working to their full ability, they're not earning the money that they want, or they haven't created women in their world that they want to look after. What happens is they feel purposeless and they delve into depression. Whereas if you meet men who might be suffering wars and diseases, but they've got a family, people to provide and.

[A]

Protect, that's what keeps them going.

[B]

They don't have, they don't know what depression is. And I wouldn't you talking about what's a depression?

[A]

Because they're so focused on their purpose.

[B]

Their purpose. And then you'll meet men in America like, oh, my dad made me do like math homework when I was 4 years old. And I'm still traumatized about that. Do you, do you know what trauma is like? And then they, it's because they forgot that their role in life is to be tough, to be strong. And one of the things that I notice is in men in particular, why they're getting so weak is they're told that they should just be unconditionally loved. It doesn't matter what they do. For what? For what? Yeah, but it's not good for, for them. They need actually conditions, especially in parenting.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

When they have a father that's strict on them, tells them you need to provide, you need to protect, you need to clean the house, a good role model, you need to be a problem solver. Now, because they're constantly told that that's abusive and they should just be loved unconditionally, they're losing their purpose and losing their way. And that's why we find this incel loneliness crisis is that they don't want to work for outcomes. They want to watch pornography rather than try and get a woman or they want to hire a prostitute rather than actually getting the women that they want, they don't want to work for outcomes anymore. And as a result they're losing their purpose. And that's where the depression hits.

[A]

I was going to ask you, just talking about the western world. Right. Why do you think more people, especially more men, are like, I'm depressed I'm this, I'm that versus in Asian society, in Middle Eastern society, they don't come out and say that that much. There are chemical imbalances in people genuinely that happen. There are certain things of course, that exist in this society, but we are just tougher as a race, absolutely tougher.

[B]

And I don't, I don't understand where this comes from, but I think personally it stems from parenting. What happens, happens with Western parenting is they're afraid that they think that setting boundaries and rules and regulations is going to traumatize them. So they think that they just give them unconditional love and love. Love, love, love, love. Anything outside of love is abusive. So what happens in the real world when you don't get love and you actually get negative feedback and you get really tough circumstances? They're not equipped for it. They don't know how to handle feedback. The second thing that happens is their expectation is that they should be happy. They should feel happy, happy all the time. Whereas in the Eastern world they're like, they don't have the expectation of feeling happy, they have the expectation of being useful. They just think, how do I be useful, how do I do things, how do I achieve things, how do I be useful? Whereas in the Western world is how do I be happy? And happiness is an outcome of being really useful as a man. It's an outcome of being really successful. It's an outcome of fulfilling your potential. Whereas in the Western world they chase happiness first and don't worry about utility and purpose or anything like that. Be happy. You can't be happy without the usefulness first. So I think that's the key difference of why they are suffering.

[A]

You also talk a lot about why women are attracted to the bad boy.

[B]

Yeah, well, I would just genuinely say it's not that much that they don't like nice guys and they like the bad guys. But what they really admire men is courage. They like courageous men. And what bad boys do is they signal risk taking. They might take courage when it comes to the law, they break the law a little bit. Or when comes to it, when it comes to money, they might be a bit courageous, maybe invest in things that, you know, just to see what happens in businesses. They have this courage behind them. And because they have this courage behind them, they also a bit fearless, even with women, they might even just, you know, not answer her or, you know, be a bit tough with her or whatever it is. So it's the courage behind the bad boy, the risk taking that they find super attractive. Whereas nice men, what they lack is that courage. They don't have confrontational conversations, they don't have the courage to stand up for themselves. They don't have the courage to take any risk. It's not the lack of courage in the nice guy and the courage that seems to be in the bad boys that they find attractive. And courage doesn't mean good. Sometimes you take courage and you take really bad risk, but it's still attractive to women.

[A]

And how do women decipher between this is too much of a good thing or this is too much of a bad thing?

[B]

You have to think to yourself that what's your vision in your life? Where do you see yourself in 5, 10 years? And is this man and the decisions he's making right now going to lead me there or is it going to leave me completely off my path? If he's going to lead you there, even if there's bumps in the road, but he's going to get you there, go ahead and go for it. But if he's totally derailing you, it's too much. You should try and stay away from that man.

[A]

What was the vision for your life when you met your husband?

[B]

I just wanted to start a family. I had no desire to be super successful on I if one thing that people don't realize is I had zero. And I still don't really have a team. I just have somebody that answers my emails. But I've never had a social media team, I've never had a manager, I've never had bookings, I've never. People say, oh, she pays to go on podcasts. I've never paid to. I've never even asked to be on podcasts. I've been very lucky that people have come to me. It's just always come to me. It wasn't my vision, it was never my thing to be online and to do all of these things. But I just had a talent towards finding the problems and solutions to relationship issues. My vision has always been to just start a family and actually live quite a low key life. Unfortunately, my vision has completely been blown away. So what I've decided to do is, unfortunately for me, I live a life where whatever my plans are and whatever I pray for the opposite, opposite, opposite. I've never had a prayer answered in my life. I'm not saying that in a bad way. I'm not trying to be ungrateful to God, but I get lots of blessings, but none of them are things I've asked for. Anything I ask for or want for Me, the opposite will happen. The exact opposite will happen. So I. Even to the point where sometimes if someone tells me they're sick, I don't even pray for them because I'm worried, like, I'm going to die. So I. I try not to pray. So don't come to me because my prayers unfortunately just don't get answered. So, unfortunately, I'm a little bit stuck. I don't get what I want. I just get what God decides for me. And I just have to kind of roll with the punches now.

[A]

And so in this chapter of your life, family is becoming a really big priority for you.

[B]

It's itching. I kind of am itching. Itching, itching. Because I remember and I. My peak of my career would probably be like being on Jay Shetty's podcast or being on Lewis Howes. I remember being like, this is like a dream come. And they really are amazing people. Right? They are just as amazing. You see online, they were nicer in person and even more loving and more kind and great interviewers. And it's a peak of your performance as somebody who goes on podcasts. And I remember coming home and still thinking, that was like, the peak of my life. But I'm still craving a child. Like, why am I still craving a child?

[A]

Wiring. That's.

[B]

Yeah. No matter how much you try and compensate. And I've lived a very fulfilled life. No matter how much you try and compensate, say to is still niggling at me. I remember still coming back and thinking, okay, I still need to do my egg retrievals. I still need to do all of these things. So I think it's something that won't go in me until I have it. So I think that's the goal.

[A]

Do you come from a big family?

[B]

Yeah. There's lots of siblings. There's five of us, and there's lots of nieces and nephews, lots of cousins. There's, you know, a big, big family. And I just always enjoyed kids. I've always worked with kids. I've always loved kids. I'm obsessed with them. I think the main thing I had my whole life, I was always super, super judged by men and women in life. I was always like, kind of the person people talk about, gossip about, be a bit mean about. And that would always be my case. And even when I'm on online, I would have so much controversy. Sometimes I see other people say the exact same things as I do, and for some reason it's like, yeah, great, you're doing great. But when I say it's like, oh fuck you. And it's just really hostile. So I've always been really. Something about me just triggers a lot of negativity in people. So whereas children, I've never had that experience, they kind of don't have those judgments. So I always remember thinking, I just love being around kids and I could be around kids forever.

[A]

Be yourself and be accepted in love for that.

[B]

I just love that. So it's probably selfish.

[A]

Why do you think more people get triggered when you say a certain thing versus like a middle aged white guy or somebody else of a different gender or of a different, you know, look or appearance?

[B]

Because James Sexton, who's a divorce lawyer, me and him share pretty much all the same views because he works with high flying clients and we very, very similar and we'll say very, very similar things and he'll get loads and loads of praise and I'll get endless, endless, endless hate from it.

[A]

And from women or more from men?

[B]

It's from women. I get a lot from incel men and women in general. So it's that kind of thing that inside the tiny group of men that I really hate women and women. I get a lot of hate from women in particular. And what they don't realize is that my message is actually quite helpful for men and women. Because I work with men so much, I can kind of explain how they think and act and it's helpful for women. In the same time, it's not my opinion, it's just what men are saying. But I think in women in general, and I think, I think the experience I had is because I'm from Pakistan and I'm Muslim and normally what they used to is Pakistani Muslim women saying, I was so oppressed my whole life and thank you America, you made me free. And I'm like, what are you talking about? I love being Asian, I love being Muslim. I'm so proud of where I'm from. What are you talking. You're wrong. I. Our views are right. And that was really triggering for them because they're so used to that narrative of being this oppressed, unattractive, doesn't look after headscarf and just like so sad and hates her and religion. And then I come along and I'm just like, I love my values, I love where I was raised. I'm so glad I'm not western. I'm so, so proud to be Eastern. I just don't like what that stands for. And it's just my opinion. And also I don't think the values that the Western world instills is good for children and good for the home. I don't think it's healthy for the home. This whole idea of like, you know, this the way that they raise children, the way that they've created homes. And because I wasn't this oppressed upset trying to free myself of Pakistani values or Muslim values, woman, they just found it against their norms. They're like, this is not what we're expecting from her. Is she trying to say she's better than us? Is she trying. And I'm not trying to say any of that at all. This is just my opinion. We were raised where we were taught that Western women can all day, every day talk about how their values are better than us. They can tell you every single day how free they are and how oppressed they are. They can tell you every day that we need to free women in Iran and all this stuff, we just accept it, but if we have a little bit of confidence where we come from, automatically we're stoned for it. So I think that just didn't resonate well with a lot of women.

[A]

I think the Western world really practices and this, I think what you might be saying about raising children is very individualistic. And all that matters is just your immediate family. We are raised in community. We're raised by our aunts and uncles and grandparents and all our cousins. And we are raised with open doors and open arms at all times. And so we don't just think about ourselves. If we think about how everybody in our family would be affected by our decisions.

[B]

Yeah, and I love that for us because one of the things, I think the reason why there's such a high rate of depression is they've lost their collectivism. And this whole idea that be independent, be yourself, self esteem, self, self, self is so self destructive because the only way that you can genuinely stay happy in life is if you have a community around you. And what happens is when your life is falling apart, not only do you, you have the social support of them, but you also live vicariously through their happiness. When they have kids, you're happy for them. When they're getting married, you're happy for them. There's a general happiness for your group. As long as your group is good, you're good. Whereas now they think as long as if I'm sad, that's it, that's the end of the world. They don't have a higher or group purpose. And I think that's what's destroying them. And I think if they realize that this is really important for them. They would see a complete reduction in their anxiety, depression or their mental health issues. But they see seem to and it's not their fault. It's the conditioning is so self serving that unfortunately it's reading narcissism and depression at the same time.

[A]

And what do you think about what advice would you have for people who are listening to this and say maybe I want to look at things from an eastern lens.

[B]

I would say that you're going to love it here, it's a great place to be. Look, of course it's not perfect. I'm not saying in any way, shape or form because I know that they're going to say, well let's see what you would do if you spoke about this in Pakistan. We can speak about this in Pakistan. It's completely normal.

[A]

No one's going to say anything to us.

[B]

No one's going to. Nothing's going to happen. All they say, let's say what would happen if we built a church in Pakistan? Nothing would happen.

[A]

We have Christmas trees.

[B]

We have Christmas trees and Christmases. Nothing would happen. It's just that you think that, but nothing would actually happen. I genuinely, it's not that I think one is better than the other, I just think one is more designed for family than the other. And because my message is very family oriented and towards kids and making sure kids are in a good environment, I tend to lean towards more of those values because they help children. So the values of things like trying to keep the home together, not being so narcissistic, not keeping in touch with your aunts, uncles, all of those things being reasonable in the home, just better for kids. Whereas this whole idea of custody battles, never letting a man see this war, gender war, they're weaponizing children. There's a war between men and women online that the word doesn't need to exist, doesn't need to exist in any way, shape or form. And they're so proud of that war. And I really think it's because of the decline of religion. I think when you don't have a religion or a culture or an identity, you over identify things with things like your gender, that becomes your whole thing. So gender rights, gender, gender, gender. But me, I always thought that if I take women's side over men and I just take women's side, how is that any different to being a racist? Like I just take people who are similar to me, who look like me, their side over and above other people because they're similar to me. So I Think the mindset of taking gender side because you happen to be a gender is no different to a racist. And I'm just not that way inclined. I'm far more balanced.

[A]

And do you think a lot of women who come after you are not Asian women? How do Asian women respond to your content? Or Muslim women?

[B]

They go in two directions. They're either really happy that they've got a voice and they're like, oh my God, I've got somebody who gets it. And she totally. I was so lost. I didn't have somebody who kind of spoke my mind. Thank you for being our voice. But if she's one of those women that is really like patriarchy sucks and I'm a feminist and I. And she really hates. They get really, really resentful. They get even more like she's taking. Taking us back in time. She's almost encouraging this Pakistani or Muslim mentality. And I've, you know, always told people how oppressive it is. So it can go in two directions.

[A]

You know, I don't meet that many women who hate who have this patriarchy about them, though. Maybe that's not the society I'm part of or coming across it. Or maybe that's when you look at it from a western lens, you're kind of seeing it more in America than you are over here.

[B]

Yeah, I don't mean to either, but that might be because we are not. We're around good men. Maybe we haven't been around terrible, terrible men. And so we, we kind of see it. Good. Because I never understood this obsession with patriarchy and this hatred for men until I had my attack online and I saw all these incel. Men constantly attacking me. I remember the main guy who was based in New York, was attacking me all day, every day. But when I was in New York that day in that time, he completely hid. He knew exactly where I was, where I was. Like, he didn't come in person.

[A]

What do you mean? There's one person? One person.

[B]

Yeah, John, his name is in New York, who just released all of this, was behind all of this, constantly attacking me. But when I landed in New York, he was silent. Wouldn't want to be anywhere near me.

[A]

Reach out to him.

[B]

Yeah, I did. I did. And he wouldn't want to respond. He gave a time to. He's like, yeah, okay, I'll meet you at 5am he said, let's meet at 5am 5am who's going to meet at 5am so deliberately we're trying to avoid. So I never understood this Hatred towards men until I experienced the incel world. And once you experience the incel world, you think, oh my God, there's actually men out there like this. So then I could understand. I had far more empathy for women that really hate men is because. Because they might be around those types of men, but because I've always been around, protective, providing, strong, masculine men, I've always loved men. I was like, what's the problem? Men are fine. There's no issue. Why do you hate them so much? So maybe we've been privileged with the sample of men that we're around and.

[A]

Looking at what happened to you, and you said that you suffer from anxiety, you have an anxious attachment style. When everything blew up online the way it did, how did your husband respond?

[B]

Really well, if I'm honest, way better than I would have. I would have never been able to handle something like that. I'd be like, this is still humiliating. Whether it's true or not, it's still embarrassing for me. What is this nonsense? Blah, blah. But I think it was just a case of he really put aside how he's feeling and just saw me and he was just so hurt for me. I think the main thing he found was I've obviously built this reputation online of being very credible, all praise be to God, and just being very balanced and having very traditional values. And because they tried to attack all of that with their nonsense, it was a breakdown of everything I built so much for. And it's. The remnants are still there. I always thought, cancel culture. You know, my content speaks for itself. People will look beyond it, but they don't. They just focus on that part. So unfortunately, the years of giving so much advice, I remember getting emails or getting messages from people saying, you saved my marriage. You've prevented me from getting a divorce. But you're just a. And I just thought to myself, I saved your marriage. I saved you from getting. But this is one. But you're a whore.

[A]

Yeah, which wasn't even full, which is not even true.

[B]

And even if it was true, I still. And you paid me nothing, by the way. You got that totally for free. Helped you helped your wife, helped you avoid suicide. Totally for free. And because you think I'm a whore, that negates everything. And I just made me realize how ungrateful the online community is. So it made me think that it's not really. I'm not really designed for it. One thing I really do admire is people like the Kardashians or the famous people online who just get it Blow after blow, and they just go further. They keep going because they listen to their fans, not their trolls. Me, I'm not really quite there yet. I'm kind of like, oh, I can't be bothered with this. It just doesn't mean enough for me to fight through it. So that's why I found it really, really difficult.

[A]

So for me, starting the show and stuff. And I wanted to bring you on, a lot of people on my team were like, wait, she has all this controversy. Why do you want to bring her on? I said, because I'm interested to hear her side of it. And it's really funny, my producer, David, that sitting there actually said to me when he was doing all the research, he's like, I actually think you're going to agree with her more than not when you actually sit down and talk to her. And so for me, it's all about giving somebody a chance, sitting down and getting to know them and hearing their side of who they are, what makes them them, and really peeling the lure, the TikToks and the viral content being like, let me piece this apart and see if I'm aligned with you in terms of value systems.

[B]

Oh, thank you so much. But can I ask you, you know, you said there's some things you agree with, some things you don't. I always like hearing what people don't agree with because then I can just explain it or I can give my side.

[A]

And, you know, it's so funny that you say that when, before I came and sat down over here, one of the things was the little clip that I told you about, which, where you discussed that somebody needs to be tricked.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Or do you look for a provider? And I was like, no, I don't care if I can trick somebody or not. Not. I would look for a provider. And when you answered that for me, when I drilled it, you gave me the answer that I needed because I was like, for me, at this stage of my life, it doesn't matter if you're not the sharpest tool in the shed to find if I can trick you or not. But if you are fulfilling other roles and responsibilities, and that is not because I cannot provide for myself. I absolutely can. But I respect that you're a man on your path and on your mission.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. And it was anything else that you found?

[A]

No. Well, one of the other things was I was going to ask you about your background degree. Right. So you spoke about how you were an educator and you were a teacher.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Right. And you taught psychology.

[B]

That's the thing that I find so bizarre. I taught for 10 years. You physically can't teach in the UK or Dubai without, you know, an education. You physically can't do it without your degrees, your diplomas. You can't physically do it. So they'll say to me, no, yes, you can. You can teach college kids without a degree. How is I? Oh, you faked your degree, you faked your education, you fake, it's not possible to do that. So, and I, I haven't faked any. I have all the. Otherwise I wouldn't be able to go to college. By the way, I went in the UK and the University of London in the UK and I studied everything in the uk and when I came to Dubai, the one thing I don't have is a license in the DHA license. And the reason I don't have a DHLA license, which I explained before, is that because in Dubai, if you have a DHA license, you can only work in clinics and in person in Dubai and you can only serve Dubai. Whereas if you're going online, the license is kind of like different countries have different licenses. So you, if you're going online, it's almost better, better to just use your therapy and just say you're a therapist rather than a licensed psychologist. Because license would mean you have to stay in that jurisdiction. That's all that license means. But they took it to mean license. If you don't have a license, that means you're not legally allowed. Of course you're legally allowed. It's just, yeah, I can serve different countries and jurisdictions. So the license is an issue. And you'll see most coaches that have gone online, if they were previously licensed, they usually have to give it up so that they can teach everybody or work with everybody. So that's the thing that I don't have a Dharma UK license. I won't get one and I definitely won't get a UK one either because then it constricts me. So that's the, that's where they held on to that.

[A]

But do you think there's also a difference between being like, I'm a coach versus a clinical psychologist.

[B]

Yeah. And Right.

[A]

And people get, I think where they're coming at you and I might be completely wrong is because your handle is Saudi psychology.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they're like, well, she's saying she's a full fledged psychologist and you're like, no, I'm a coach. I'm coaching you through life. So that's also differentiation. And you've been smart to pick up on the marketing and do that. And I agree with how catchy the name name is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I think they're getting attached to essentially.

[B]

The first time I came online, my handle was actually the psychology teacher, because that's what I was. I was always a psychology. So I've always taught psychology. My degree is in psychology, I do psychotherapy. My diplomas are in psychotherapy and cognitive behavioral therapy and inner child work and all of that stuff. So all my diplomas are in psychology. And so because of that, I didn't say Saudi psychologist, I said cyopsychology. And then the other thing that to bear in mind is unfortunately, psychologist isn't a protected term, is usually as long as you've done the clinical research and you've done your degree, they can pass it as the psychologist. I don't actually advertise as a licensed psychologist. I'll just say Sally's psychology because that's what I'm essentially breaking down to everybody. But I would say now it's probably easier because online they're so attached to it, it's better to just say therapist or something or a coach. And the other thing, again I would say, is that there are so many. The Tony Robbins of the world or, you know, they're all coaches as well. And the other other women that are online, like the Esther Perez or Jordan Peters, no Mel Robbins. Nobody says, where's your degree? Where's it from? Go release it. They kind of trust the Western world so blindly. But if you're a brown person, they're like, well, where's this, where's this, where's that? They're trying to find holes in everything you choose. And I always find it. Even, you know, I don't like to bring it up, but they'll even attack people like Jay Shetty for not being qualified. They seem to think that if you're not the same as them, they, you can't be qualified or if you sound professional, but you're not, they want to find holes in it. I would say the better thing to do is always, if you're going online, have the qualifications. And the reason I say this is because I worked with so many people. That's where my insight came from. If I was just a therapist and I didn't work with people, you need both. You need that insight into working with clients. 1, 1 to 1. You also need the qualifications. You need need both of them. If you have one without the other, you're still going to be useless. So if you just work with people but you don't have any training, you're probably going to lead them in the wrong direction. If you have all the training, but you don't work with a big clientele, you just stick to people you know. You're also going to be limited. You kind of need the, you need both. You actually need both to really get that insight into people.

[A]

Have you ever just thought just to shut people up and be like, I never want to answer this again, go to hell. Gone on the website and be like, here's my diploma, I've uploaded it and did.

[B]

I did do that. But then what happens is there's legal kind of, they can kind of dox it and they can actually find your address from these places, particularly if they have somebody in the same university or something like that. So I did have it for a long time and it just led to more problems because then they were trying to trace your address. They try and trace where you come from and it just leads to more and more issues. So I do have it online. You can, you can search it, you will find it. It's on LinkedIn and you will find it. But they'll still find a problem. Then they'll say, we don't like the university you went to. So then they'll find a problem with that. So unfortunately, I think the more you give them, the more you give a dog, the more they hold onto the bone. And I think that's the problem that I have is no matter what you do, if they don't want to find, if they don't want to like you, they'll find a reason for it. Whereas healthy people will just say, I trust that nobody can really sit there and have all this insight without zero training and just came from, like, didn't study or anything and just have that. Chances are they've got some understanding. And even if they do or don't, I won't listen to it. It's as simple as that. I won't listen to people who I don't agree with.

[A]

My whole takeaway is when you meet personalities online like yourself or other people, and they're giving advice.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

If that advice helps you, wonderful. Go for it. Apply it to your life. If it doesn't suit you and it doesn't apply to you and you don't have the same value system. Keep scrolling.

[B]

It's not that.

[A]

Why do you make it your life's mission to tear somebody else down?

[B]

And I also think you're not paying for the advice. If you're paying for the advice, absolutely I can understand, can I? Because any one of my clients can get everything sent to them. They get it straight away. But the people who are not paying for it, you're getting free. How does it affect you? You're not paying for it, you didn't ask for it. They're not, you're not getting medicated from it. It. The over analysis is just their way of trying to take. Because they can't tear down the message, they have to try and tear down the messenger because they're not articulate enough to tear down the messenger itself. So they have to try and kind of attack you as much as possible. And I've been facing it from the day I started online. You would think that, you know people, the amount of hate I get, you would think that if you scroll in my content you'd see this really, really hostile stuff and really aggressive stuff and you just see quite, I actually think quite common sense things. It's actually quite regular and normal and it's actually non controversial.

[A]

I think it's regular and normal for us because we come from a different part of the world.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And for culturally we're raised a certain way.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so the things and the message that you're deploying and distilling is normal for us because that's the value systems we were given growing up.

[B]

Yeah. And I think the other thing is, I might say something as simple as children need fathers and mothers in their life. They need both. Absolutely think that that's normal. And it's like, oh my God, I'm a single mom, my parents are fine, my kids are fine.

[A]

That is fine if you're a single mom. But at the end of the day, both parents should ideally be in the picture. And if you're a single month, kudos to you. My mom, because my father is in and out so much of the time, raised me by herself. I can tell you from personal experience that I wish my father was around more.

[B]

And you know, I should have had.

[A]

Both parents in the picture.

[B]

Everybody, everybody. And I say this as somebody like, who's very, very attached to my father. I just can't imagine how difficult it must be because sometimes your partner will let you down. And one of the things I will always say is husbands. Everybody else is very conditional. You have to watch how you look, you have to watch how you speak to them. Everything is conditional with fathers. They give you that like safety net. So if they didn't give that to you, it's very difficult as a woman to trust men after that. So I Think that saying that children need fathers, you would think people are like, yeah, unfortunately they do.

[A]

They're like, so women get so offended. And I don't think I'm taking away, negating away from women saying, you're incredible if you're raising this child by yourself. Yeah, my mom did it. She was, you know, they had a lot of issues and my mom was on her own. But sometimes it's really hard just having her to turn to.

[B]

Yeah. And also children need like a good cop, bad cop in the home. When the mother is forced to be both, it kind of leads to the child not knowing what direction it gets unstable for the child. They don't know if she's going to be the loving, nurturing one today or the disciplinary. Whereas when you have a clear role between the two, it's just easier for children. That's all it is. It's just super easier for children.

[A]

But that's why also in same sex marriages, I'll go back to this. There's a masculine and there's a feminine. And when they have children, children, there's a masculine. There's a mother and there's a father.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's a reason that happens and it's.

[B]

Really important for children. They need it. And so I don't think, I think because I don't put gender first and I put children first, the message isn't as. It doesn't hit as well. Whereas if I was clearly siding with one gender, I think I would be a lot more viral and a lot more liked. But because I'm not siding with a particular gender, I think that's where the problems lie.

[A]

I think problems can come from both genders.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. They really, really darn fortunate. Do you face anything or any backlash online or. No.

[A]

Do you know what? I've been really vocal about a lot of things so far. No.

[B]

That's amazing.

[A]

Yeah. I am like a little bit like you. I'm extremely confrontational and I can put my foot down on things. If I believe in something. No one's changing my mind.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Unless I educate myself and I myself come to that conclusion. But I will not be bullied online and I do not tolerate trolls.

[B]

Oh, amazing. Because I could say the most nonchalant thing and it would just get such a reaction that I'm like, oh, my God, but it must be something. I think it's me. Rather than what I'm saying. I think I just trigger the Internet and I don't know, do you know what it could be like? Because even I'M always kidding. Like, what is, what am I saying that's so extreme?

[A]

I triggered people in person. What do you think is the most nonchalant thing you could say to the.

[B]

Camera that would trigger somebody? I would say something like, if you, if your wife is cheating on you, you should probably divorce her. She'll probably cheat on you again.

[A]

100%, you should divorce her.

[B]

Duh. I want to see, I want to. Let's do that. I want to make a clip of it. Okay. See how much hate it gets. Okay.

[A]

Okay, let's do it again.

[B]

Okay. If your wife is cheating on you, she'll probably cheat on you forever. And she's probably just using you for free accommodation. And that seems to cause a lot of issues. Women don't cheat on men that they're truly attracted to and they truly respect. They just don't do it because they just simply don't do it. So when they're truly invested, they don't cheat when they are out of it, but they still need you for some something that's when they start cheating. And I remember thinking, that's obvious. I thought, every man knows that. And then the Internet would be, I forgave my wife so many years I'm not around. Yeah. And you'll find she'll cheat on you again. There's something about.

[A]

But it goes both ways, right? It goes for men as well.

[B]

It goes for men and women. But I would say that here's a key difference. When, when you forgive a man for cheating, chances are he'll do it again. But over the years, women's sexual. Everything is different to a man. So she's more likely to turn a blind eye. She actually doesn't care as much that he's done it. Whereas for men who women, when women cheat, the man actually really wants to keep having sex with her for the rest of her life. So the fact that she gives it to somebody else and not him, it really bothers men for the rest of their life. And I think so something that happens. Well, why it's different is it's always. There's a reason why so many countries around the world have always had polygamy for men, but there's very few that have it for women. It's our design is simply different. It's just totally different. So when men forgive a woman for cheating, she loses. Loses respect for him. She genuinely just loses respect for him. And I think it is slightly different between genders. I don't think either one is good, but women are a bit more like, oh, you know what, do what you want, just stay out of my, like just leave me alone for a little while. Whereas some men, I think they find it really difficult when their wife is cheating.

[A]

I'll push back on that. And yeah, this is my kind of point of view on this is women who turn a blind eye is because they don't have a choice to leave.

[B]

I think so.

[A]

And a lot of time they're like fearful, they've had perimenopause, they had menopause, they have their kids, they don't know what to do. They're like, shit, other men do it. So why should I, I have to, to tolerate this as well versus a woman who has choice. And it's a repeated pattern. And she sees it, she'll stand up and say, you know what? No, I'm not going to stay. And my self respect comes first. And I also want to feel like I'm the only person in your life.

[B]

And I, I, you know, I completely understand that. But having worked with so many women and men over the years, one thing I will say, say is every woman I've met that left a man for cheating on her went on to meet another man that cheats on her. So.

[A]

But then she's picking the wrong guy.

[B]

She's picking the wrong guy. And if, or there might be something in honesty, what also happens is women, over time, their sex drive doesn't keep up with a man's sex drive. It just decreases. It's changing now because men are so porn addicted.

[A]

But, and also women are going on hrt.

[B]

Yeah, they're going on hrt. So it's changing where it's getting balanced. But for a long time there was a mismatch between it and because of that mismatch, there's always going to be a risk with majority of men. What I find in my honest experience is majority of men, if they have high testosterone and the women deprive them of, of intimacy, are going to cheat. That if, if there's a deprivation, they.

[A]

Use it as a tool. Sometimes women punish men by not wanting.

[B]

To sleep with them.

[A]

Wives do that all the time, right? They're like, I'm not gonna sleep with you because of X, Y and Z. That's not okay. And that's gonna lead them to cheat. Not. That is correct. Yeah, but you don't weaponize sex either.

[B]

Unfortunately. There's just one outcome of doing that. Two things will happen. Either he'll be really passive and just accept no sex in his marriage. You don't like that guy cuz it's super weak or he'll might think I've got kids. I don't. I want to get a divorce. It's not much a hassle. But I do need sex and they'll go elsewhere. So I think that if you are a woman that deprives intimacy in any way, shape or form, or you let yourself go so much that they lose attraction, you have to expect that leaving him won't leave the problem. Whereas if you pick a man that you can try and have as much intimacy for as long as you can keep that alive. But the other thing is he has to have a fear of losing you, that you won't tolerate this. They're less likely to cheat.

[A]

So in the western realm, men are. Testosterone levels are going down further and further. I don't know what the global levels are because obviously I live in the States. However, because men's testosterone is being so affected and because men do not have these clear gender roles, a lot of times that we have spoken about on the show, the women are more likely to leave because they're like, we're not going to tolerate this crap because you're also not giving me X, Y and Z that I want.

[B]

Yeah. And it's just like what would happen before is it would be men of value that might cheat. So it'd be a man that's really successful or a man that's really handsome. And you kind of know now what's happening with the advent of pornography and prostitutes is becoming so common. Is even the loser guy that doesn't pay any bills, he's not that particular. It's okay to cheat. He's even cheating. And it's like, you're lucky you got a wife and you're having the audacity to cheat. So I think what's happening is, unfortunately it is becoming more common. I would say my honest advice to women in general when it comes to cheating is focus more on how a man treats you, whether rather than his, his fidelity. And I, and I know that sounds counterproductive, but what I mean by that is some women will be with a man that's super toxic, really bad to.

[A]

Her, just as long as he doesn't cheat. Because he doesn't, that's not okay either. I'm not promoting that he doesn't cheat.

[B]

So she's like, I'm going to stick at it because he hasn't cheated. Cheating is her only deal breaker. And I understand that because that was me for a really long time. There's other Women that will have a man that treats her really, really well, like financially, everything. But the. He's cheating all the time. I. I would honestly say the happiest women are the women that focus on how a man treats them to his face. Like, how do you treat me day to day rather than what you're doing behind my back. They're the reason, because the more he treats you badly to your face, more likely he is to do something bad behind your back. The nicer he is to your face, the less likely he is to do, the nicer he'll probably be behind your back. So focus on the treatment you're receiving rather than what they're doing behind your back. Don't consume yourself with that. Because unfortunately, it's one thing you can never predict. People will. You'll never be able to predict what someone does behind your back. Focus on what happens, treat you rather than what they might do behind your back.

[A]

And a lot of women stay in marriages even though the man won't cheat. And they're treating them like shit to their face just because, oh, he doesn't cheat. I don't have to go out looking for him.

[B]

And the other thing that I would say, sometimes he does cheat, but he's treated her so well throughout those years, and it might have been a mistake. I actually just say, overall, what was the relationship like? Was he overall a good man that made a mistake? If so, try and make it work. If he's overall a bad man and this just happens to be the icing on the cake, let him him go.

[A]

Who do you think cheats more, men or women?

[B]

Nowadays, I would say women actually cheat a little bit more. And the reason I say that is men might do subtle cheating, like following girls a lot more and maybe watching pornography a lot more, whatever it is, but because they're becoming that kind of man, she then feels like, why are you doing this all day? Like, and then she's more likely to take revenge or she's more likely to. There's. The normalization of cheating has become really common as well. Yeah, tick tock. And Instagram has really kind of encouraged women to become this person who cheats and like, kind of encouraging women to be this way. So unfortunately, I think what's happened is that there is no stigma attached to cheating anymore. There is no real desire to marry somebody you truly love and respect anymore. It's more who can give you a lot more. So I think the next generation of women and women have far more options. You've got to remember, if A woman posts a selfie online, DMs will be filled. Whereas men have to really try and work to cheat. It's so easy for women. So I think. I think, unfortunately, it's actually shifting more towards women than it is men.

[A]

And do you think they're sexually cheating or just emotionally cheating or both?

[B]

Both, I would say. Both. I would say because men are becoming so passive and low testosterone, women are still unfulfilled in that area and they are far more likely. And they hide it a lot better than men. Men tend to be a bit naive. Women, we're very like, where have you been? What time did you come home? Men are a bit like, oh, she would never. They kind of say that tilt a lot. They're very delusional. My wife would never. She would never. I know she does that, but she would never. She's a good girl. She's a good girl. What men do is they pick a woman and then they convince themselves she's good. Whereas women, we all pick a man and we try and look for what you might be doing wrong. So we're a lot less naive than men are. Men are a bit more naive in that. And then they let a lot slide.

[A]

Coming towards the end of the show, because a lot of our followers are women, and I think your advice is going to be super beneficial to them. What are three tips you want to leave these women with who might be trying to improve their marriage? Marriages or women who are looking for a partner at this stage of their life, in their 30s and their 40s.

[B]

I would say it's very hard to achieve. But if you can try and find these three things in a man, and as long as these three things are there, don't worry about the outside noise, you'll probably be able to work on it. Firstly, try and pick a man you're attracted to. If you bypass attraction and you think, but he treats me well, he's so nice to me, so kind to me. All these things, the intimacy will drop. And the moment the intimacy drops in a marriage, you almost become like brother and sister. Sister. You fight a bit more. Every small thing becomes big things and you don't connect as much. So try and find somebody you're attracted to. Second thing, try and find a man that you admire. Find out what you admire in people and look for that. Now, some people, they admire financial success. Other people don't care about financial success. They just admire a man that is a really, you know, really cleans a house a lot and does all these great things. He's a great family guy, great family character. Maybe he's really funny. Choose someone that you have some admiration for. If you have zero admiration for, but you're really attracted to, to him, you're gonna, you're gonna stick with him, but you're gonna be nagging him all the time to become a different person. And the final thing is try and find man that you're attracted to, you admire. But then he adores you. If you are missing that adoration, he doesn't show any affection. He doesn't give you any, like, words of affirmation. Doesn't do anything that shows he adores you in any way, shape or form. You will constantly be insecure, you will constantly be anxious. Even if he's not cheating, you will just be thinking it all the time. So try and go in that order as well. Go for attraction. Then you have admire who he is, and then he shows you some love and adoration back. But if he shows you lots of adoration back but you're not attracted to him, after a while you'll get an ick. Or if he's somebody you really admire and he adores you but you're not attracted, it's missing. You need the three components.

[A]

And do you think sometimes those three things can ebb and flow at different chapters of your life?

[B]

Absolutely. But if you think the fundamentals are there and you can get them back, like sometimes you'll lose admiration for your husband. Everybody does at some point. They do things that let you down, they hurt you or whatever, whatever it is, but you know, his character is good and he can get that back, stick at it. Or if his adoration is a bit low at the moment, but you do things and you reignite it. Date nights, you have intimacy again, whatever it is, it'll probably come back. So it'll go up and down, but as long as the foundations are there.

[A]

It's funny you're saying this, because I agree with it wholeheartedly. And I think Arthur Cook said something similar.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

And people are like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So now I want to see in the comments if people pop up at you for saying the same thing that a man said. Middle aged white guy said, yeah, you're talking, she's a scientist. Literally what he said. And I saved the clip and I can literally do a parallel. So I want to see that. If they're just pissed because it's you.

[B]

I, I would imagine a lot of it is that. But then at the same time, I don't want to sound ungrateful. I have so many females that are so supportive, so kind, so loving, so, so loving and so kind. So I can't diminish that. I really am so lucky to have so many wonderful women. And I just think I'm lucky in the sense that I feel I attract the right type of women that follow. It's just reasonable, more mature, more intelligent women that kind of get it. And I think they're not the type of women that just need rage, bait, or just need to be told, oh, he's a narcissist, and you're an angel. They're women that actually like, okay, how can I do better in life? And I think that's the audience I'm curating, and that's the audience I'm proud to have.

[A]

I'm so glad that I invited you onto the show, and I got to get to know you better because. Because our whole motto at biohacket is curiosity heals. And you have to be curious about people. You have to be curious about their story. You have to be curious about their why. And before I got on the show, I was like, I don't really know what she's gonna say, you know, because I've seen clips of you online. I've obviously seen other people's shows, but I was like, let me get to know her myself before I form an opinion. And I'm really glad that I invited you on.

[B]

Thank you so, so much for having me. The honor's all mine.

[A]

Sa.