Happy St. Patrick's Day! & "Do Irish People Get Hangovers?"

Summary

Black and White Advice Podcast
Episode: Happy St. Patrick's Day! & "Do Irish People Get Hangovers?"
Release Date: March 18, 2025

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Introduction and St. Patrick's Day Celebrations

Turner Sparks and Phil Duckett kick off the episode by celebrating St. Patrick's Day, setting a festive tone for the discussions ahead.

• Turner Sparks [00:44]: "Happy St. Patrick's Day."

Gaelic Football Experiences

Turner shares his nostalgic experience playing Gaelic football with Irish construction workers in China, blending sports with cultural exchange.

• Turner Sparks [01:46]: "I played on a Gaelic football team one time."

Phil humorously mispronounces "Gaelic," leading to a playful exchange about the sport's unique characteristics.

Irish Drinking Culture and Hangovers

A significant portion of the conversation delves into the Irish reputation for heavy drinking without experiencing hangovers. Turner attributes this resilience to genetic factors, suggesting that generations of alcohol consumption have led to enhanced liver tolerance.

• Phil Duckett [03:48]: "They can drink really well."
• Turner Sparks [04:27]: "They have a gene... superheroes. So they would... be fine."

The hosts recount anecdotes of Irish teammates who could drink late into the night and still perform athletically the next morning, highlighting the cultural stereotype with humor.

Black Community in Ireland

The conversation shifts to the presence of Black individuals in Ireland, a topic not widely discussed. Phil mentions the rarity, estimating around 150 Black people in Ireland, and shares stories of Black friends and acquaintances living there.

• Phil Duckett [05:32]: "I know one."
• Turner Sparks [05:37]: "I know a black lady."

They explore the dynamics of being a minority in Ireland, touching upon cultural integration and the limited visibility of Black communities.

McDonald's Founders' Heritage – Fact-Checking

A humorous debate ensues about the Irish origins of the McDonald's founders, with Joe McRussell providing the factual account post-recording to clarify misconceptions.

• Joe McRussell [40:08]: "They founded McDonald's in San Bernardino, California in 1940, and then Ray Kroc bought McDonald's from the McDonald's brothers in 1961 for $2.7 million."

Race-Related Anecdote: Macy's Sale Experience

Turner narrates his experience at a Macy's sale, leading to a race-related question from a listener about why some White people might prefer rescuing dogs over humans. The hosts discuss the stereotype humorously, attributing it to certain personality traits.

• Listener Martin [23:19]: "I'm a 45-year-old black guy. Why will white people rescue dogs but not humans?"
• Phil Duckett [23:20]: "Nobody wants to be their friend. And dogs can't tell you they hate you."

Listener Questions: Facial Care and Soaps

Connor from San Jose, California, poses a question regarding the use of face wash among Black men, sparking a discussion about skincare routines and cultural influences.

• Connor [25:08]: "How long have black guys been using face wash?"
• Phil Duckett [25:44]: "That's probably something new. Once they started putting the face wash in the soap."

Turner reminisces about childhood practices, such as using dish soap to wash hair, contrasting it with modern skincare habits influenced by female counterparts.

• Turner Sparks [26:43]: "We used to wash our hair with dish soap."

Listener Questions: Black People’s Views on Africans

George from Portland, Oregon, asks about Black Americans' perceptions of Africans, opening a dialogue on cultural differences and tensions within the Black community.

• George [28:40]: "What do black people think of Africans?"
• Phil Duckett [29:00]: "There is sometimes tension between American [Black people] and Africans."

The hosts explore themes of immigration, work ethic, and historical grievances, acknowledging both solidarity and differences within the broader Black community.

Ramadan and Lent Discussion

A brief, lighthearted segment touches upon Ramadan and Lent, although the hosts humorously admit to some confusion about these observances' timing and practices.

• Phil Duckett [15:19]: "We are in Ramadan."
• Turner Sparks [17:20]: "Giving up weed for Lent."

Final Thoughts and Growth of the Podcast

Towards the end, Turner and Phil reflect on the podcast's growth, celebrating their increase in listeners and expressing gratitude to their audience. They discuss future aspirations, including reaching the top 5% of podcasts and potentially entering the top 1%.

• Phil Duckett [40:34]: "We could get there in a couple of years."
• Turner Sparks [40:37]: "We'll probably be there by the end of this year."

Conclusion

The episode concludes with a mix of humor and camaraderie, reinforcing the podcast's mission to address race-related questions with honesty and levity. The hosts invite listeners to engage further through Patreon and upcoming live shows.

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Notable Quotes:

• Turner Sparks [04:27]: "They were like superheroes. So they would be fine."
• Phil Duckett [29:00]: "There is sometimes tension between American [Black people] and Africans."
• Turner Sparks [25:05]: "That's the answer."

Highlights:

• Exploration of cultural nuances in sports and drinking habits.
• Humorous yet insightful discussions on racial stereotypes and community dynamics.
• Personal anecdotes that bridge White and Black perspectives on everyday experiences.
• Engaging listener questions that provoke thoughtful and comedic responses.

This episode of Black and White Advice offers a blend of humor, personal stories, and candid conversations about race and culture, making it an informative and entertaining listen for both regular followers and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Turner Sparks]

Can I tell you, when I was a kid, my family, we used to. We used to wash our hair with dish soap.

[Phil Duckett]

And this is why white people always have lice.

[Turner Sparks]

Uh huh.

[Phil Duckett]

Have you ever had a question you wanted to ask the opposite race but you were too nervous to ask?

[Turner Sparks]

I'm Turner Sparks.

[Phil Duckett]

And I'm Phil Duckett.

[Turner Sparks]

And this is Black and White advice.

[Phil Duckett]

But we answer all your questions about race, even the scary ones.

[Turner Sparks]

This is black and white advice. You've got a question but you're scared to ask Just drop the boys a message. Cause they're up to the task they're rolling the dice Ain't always nice but you can't think twice and give it like it would.

[Phil Duckett]

Advice Black and white.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, everybody, welcome to the show. Happy St. Patrick's Day.

[Phil Duckett]

Good luck.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm Turner Sparks.

[Phil Duckett]

Real deal Irish Phil behind the glass.

[Turner Sparks]

We got Joe McRussell on the ones and twos. Protect your small business with Lifelong. Now you're running your own ads.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, right. You even get paid to advertise these?

[Turner Sparks]

We get no money out of Lifelong. Joe's running his ads on the side. Drew Rush. Rush Limbaugh. God damn, I can't think anymore. It's been a long day. We're happy to be here with you on St. Patrick, Phil. Give us your Irish impression.

[Phil Duckett]

Just a wee bit of bangers and mash.

[Turner Sparks]

Hey, top of the morning to you, ladies.

[Phil Duckett]

Hey, fat boy.

[Turner Sparks]

I don't know anything. We had an Irish guest lined up. We won't say who it was, and they were going to tell us everything about Ireland, but it turns out I think they. They couldn't make it at the last minute. So we're just going to have to take it from here. I played on a Gaelic football team one time.

[Phil Duckett]

You play gay football?

[Turner Sparks]

Gay lick football.

[Phil Duckett]

It's Irish adjectives to it. It's gay.

[Turner Sparks]

It's.

[Phil Duckett]

What are you licking?

[Turner Sparks]

Homosexual. Soccer. We mostly just goosed each other.

[Phil Duckett]

Bunch of mokes.

[Turner Sparks]

You ran around a field. It was. It was a combination. I played on a team, me and all these Irish guys. It was a combination of soccer, volleyball, basketball, and I guess.

[Phil Duckett]

And what country were you playing?

[Turner Sparks]

Rugby. This is in China. There was a bunch of Irish construction workers. The Irish construction workers, they were building houses out there for Chinese people.

[Phil Duckett]

Chinese got white slaves.

[Turner Sparks]

They import the Irish. Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Wow.

[Turner Sparks]

And then the Irish, they paid them. But yeah, they were doing well, the Chinese.

[Phil Duckett]

That's pretty crazy.

[Turner Sparks]

And so anyway, we had this Gaelic football team. I wasn't very good.

[Phil Duckett]

Was it like full Blown tackle. Like in NFL, it was like think of rugby.

[Turner Sparks]

But you could just. Rugby. Just think rugby. But you could dribble. You dribbled it like a basketball, but it was a soccer ball essentially. You could dribble it twice and then you could take like three steps and then dribble again. Or you could kick it like hacky sack it to yourself. You could dribble with your hand or with your foot. Take three steps, run and then drop kick it back to yourself.

[Phil Duckett]

Just like a major sport.

[Turner Sparks]

It is in Ireland.

[Phil Duckett]

Like they have professional team.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. And there's one in. In New York City. But. But I think it's semi pro. Like I don't know who are they playing? They're all. I think even the professionals are still construction workers.

[Phil Duckett]

Still doing like regular grocery.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. They're like football in the 50s. Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Have a full time social studies teacher place.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. But they're just like ripped. So anyway, that's my extent of Irish culture. That's all I really know.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. I don't know much about Irish people because I've met a couple cool ones.

[Turner Sparks]

Sean, Joe. Joe Russell's mc. Russell's a roommate.

[Joe McRussell]

Yeah, I got a roommate.

[Phil Duckett]

Cool ones.

[Turner Sparks]

He's a good guy.

[Phil Duckett]

He's a nice guy. Insane, but he's a nice guy.

[Joe McRussell]

Those Irish can drink.

[Turner Sparks]

Tell you what, they can drink really Well, I got a. Well, first of all, is that a.

[Phil Duckett]

Stereotype or do they can really just.

[Turner Sparks]

No, that's extremely correct. I. This, this team I played on with all these Irish people, here's what they could do. They could drink, but then like anybody can drink. Right. But what set them apart is that they would drink till 2am and then be up at 8am the next morning on the foot, on the field playing. They don't get hangovers.

[Joe McRussell]

That's what Sean happens to Sean. He'll go and drink all night and then run a marathon. The next day he did the New.

[Phil Duckett]

York marathon and I was like, have.

[Turner Sparks]

You been trying over?

[Phil Duckett]

He said, no, not really. And he was out drinking the night before.

[Turner Sparks]

That's what sets Irish people apart. They told me they have a gene.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. I'm gonna say, you think they have like a higher liver tolerance like their livers?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. So yeah, it's like some enzyme or something in their body evolved into drinking animals. Yes. Because they're generations upon generations of. Generations of booze bags. And then eventually they just don't get hangovers. They're like superheroes. So they would be. We would have a. I would have to go home at like 10. I'd be like, hey, we got a game tomorrow at 7:00am I'm going home. They would be like, oh, mate, we were out till 3.

[Phil Duckett]

This is recreational football. That's. That's what times. Do your kids play soccer games at 7am? No professional team would play.

[Turner Sparks]

We weren't professional. I wasn't on a professional team. No, I was on like, you know, you play like a pickup. A pickup team. Like a basketball team at the YMCA or something.

[Phil Duckett]

God, even if I. I love basketball. 7:00am on a Saturday.

[Turner Sparks]

It was brutal.

[Phil Duckett]

You got. You guys. Come on, let's be honest.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. You have all day tournaments. And then they would drink during the game. Like at halftime they'd all take a shot.

[Phil Duckett]

They were like 19.

[Turner Sparks]

And then they'd go right back out and keep playing and be fine. It didn't affect them physically at all. So shout out to all of our.

[Phil Duckett]

Irish people watching, how many black people are in Ireland? I say, give or take 150.

[Turner Sparks]

I know one.

[Phil Duckett]

I know a black lady, full blown Irish.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. I know a black lady.

[Phil Duckett]

Threw me off. She started talking with accent. I was like, you're really good at that.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

She was like, at what? I was like, the accent. And she was like, I'm from fucking Dublin.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm from fucking Dublin.

[Phil Duckett]

What?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

She was like, yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

I know a guy named Liberty. Shout out Liberty. He lives in New York City. I see him every once.

[Phil Duckett]

His American name he picked when he got his papers.

[Turner Sparks]

American. He's from Ireland.

[Phil Duckett]

That's what I'm saying. But he lives in America. Did he change his name to Liberty to get custody? Maybe he got one to get through the immigration process. He was like, liberty. His middle name is Ford.

[Turner Sparks]

I think his family's from Africa somewhere. And then they moved to Ireland and then he was born in.

[Phil Duckett]

So the Irish people that I met, I asked them the same. I was like, see, I only got no black people other than this lady I met.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

And she was like, we don't have too many. You're black. Like American, black. She said, we have Africans. We have Africans, yeah. She said, we don't have, like, American. She was like, you would be a hot commodity in Ireland.

[Turner Sparks]

You got to go over there.

[Phil Duckett]

I got to.

[Turner Sparks]

They have comedy clubs, Desmond.

[Phil Duckett]

But at the same time, Conor McGregor's so racist. And if that's the voice of the people, you know, well, who knows?

[Turner Sparks]

What can I say?

[Phil Duckett]

No, right?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

I mean, I don't know, you know, with the potatoes being out and famine.

[Turner Sparks]

And I think they got control of that now.

[Phil Duckett]

You think they're eating.

[Turner Sparks]

I think they finally got potatoes.

[Phil Duckett]

Nice.

[Turner Sparks]

They. They. They put it. They put it back together. Okay.

[Phil Duckett]

I didn't know if they had French fries yet. I was. I'm just gonna go with a large McDonald's fry. Just shut the whole city down.

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, they definitely have McDonald's.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay.

[Turner Sparks]

Once you. It's Mick. It is theirs.

[Phil Duckett]

They call it Mick.

[Turner Sparks]

No, but McDonald's. Doesn't that make it Irish?

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, I never thought about.

[Turner Sparks]

Isn't Ronald McDonald an Irish dude? That's why he has red hair.

[Joe McRussell]

Is that why it was started by the McDonald's brothers?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Joe McRussell]

And then Ray Kroc bought the restaurant.

[Turner Sparks]

Ronald.

[Joe McRussell]

Haven't you seen that founder movie?

[Phil Duckett]

No, I thought Ray Kroc started and then the brothers bought.

[Joe McRussell]

No, the opposite.

[Turner Sparks]

Businessman. Yeah, they were the. They were. The restaurant.

[Phil Duckett]

McDonald's was the original.

[Turner Sparks]

It was Ronald and Kevin or something like that.

[Phil Duckett]

And they were Irish.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Joe McRussell]

Well, listen, we'll address this at the end of the show. I'm gonna find out.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm saying they're Irish.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay, I like that.

[Turner Sparks]

I got a question for you, Phil. I went to. Well, first of all, wait, Patreon. I want to say. Forget. Actually, just pause on Patreon for a second. I want to say that our numbers have been going up and up and up. So thank you, everybody, for listening.

[Phil Duckett]

Man, we're at 800 a week.

[Turner Sparks]

We're beyond that.

[Phil Duckett]

We were at 40 when we started, man.

[Turner Sparks]

40 when we started. We got 800 of you. Listen every week. That's 20. We've grown by 20 times.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm so dapper.

[Turner Sparks]

It's because we're looking, because we go the extra mile. For anyone listening on audio right now, click over to video and Watch us on YouTube. We're in full Irish costume.

[Phil Duckett]

And honestly, y'all kind of shocked me. Like, our Patreon's going a lot faster than I expected. And I really didn't think I was going to have to mosh pit, if I'm being honest. And it looks like it's really going to happen.

[Turner Sparks]

It's going to be happening. If five more people put in $20 a month, that's it. We'll be in a mosh pit.

[Phil Duckett]

I'll be in a mosh.

[Turner Sparks]

We have 800. 800 of you are listening. All we need is five of you to throw in 20 bucks a month, and Phil and I will be going to the mosh pit, and we know it's tough.

[Phil Duckett]

Eggs are $38 for two. But listen, don't eat a little omelet here or there for the next week. Give us that 20.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

And I'm gonna fucking jump into a crowd of white people with my Timberlands on.

[Turner Sparks]

And it'll be on video. Joe will be there, full camera, setting the whole thing up. And. Yeah. But honestly, thank you all for listening and telling your friends. It's only growing because you guys are telling people we've only gone from 40 people a week to 800 a week because you're all talent people. So thank you. Keep spreading the word. And podcasts don't. Most podcasts don't get over ever, like a hundred listens a week. So just the number we're at right now, we're in the top, like, 5% of podcasts.

[Phil Duckett]

Really? Yeah. Because I'm still broke. Let's pick it up.

[Turner Sparks]

We're still broke.

[Phil Duckett]

Pick it up. We're in the top 5%. Let's get some money, right?

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, you can fact check that at the end.

[Joe McRussell]

Yes, we're still broke. Yes.

[Turner Sparks]

I think we're in the top 5%.

[Joe McRussell]

I will look that up right now, man.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay.

[Turner Sparks]

All right. Now I got a question for you. I was in Macy's. You know, Macy's is going out of business.

[Phil Duckett]

What?

[Turner Sparks]

Like in.

[Phil Duckett]

In on 34th Street?

[Turner Sparks]

I know downtown Brooklyn's gonna be gone.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, no, that one. The. The main.

[Turner Sparks]

The Macy's 34th Street, I think, is sticking around, but Macy's is closing like 50 Macy's around maybe 75 around the US including the one in downtown Brooklyn. So they're having this, like, crazy sale going on right now. So I was in there getting everything I could. And by the way, there's like, three things left because they're just selling everything at crazy prices. So I had a question for you. And this is race related. All right, so I'm in Macy's. I go up to pay, and the lady's like an older black woman, right? And she's dealing. I get it. She's dealing with people all day long who are only there because everything's like 90% off. She's not dealing with the classiest people in society. She's dealing with, like, the dregs of the earth, including me. So I get up to the front. It's a long line. I get to the front of the line to pay, and she says, oh, no. I said to her, hey, this jacket, it's 50% off. But there's also a sign next to the jack. There's on the jacket, it says 50% off. There's a sign next to the jacket that says plus 10%. Everything here is plus 10%. So I said to her, I go, hey, is that 60% off or is that like 55% off? Because it's. Is it 50 plus 10 or is it 50% off? And then 10% of whatever's left, which would make it 5 more percent off, right?

[Phil Duckett]

No, if it says it's already 50% off and then there's an additional sign that says, plus that 10 a day, that's 60. I mean, so that's what I thought.

[Turner Sparks]

That's what I was hoping. Yeah, but I just want to know before I pay, right? And she says to me, she goes, it says what? It says is on the sign.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

And I said, okay, but like, do you understand how there's. There, there's two different ways you can interpret it.

[Phil Duckett]

So I ask again, with a line full of people.

[Turner Sparks]

With a line full of people.

[Phil Duckett]

So I'm already here because I've worked retail.

[Turner Sparks]

There's 20 people behind.

[Phil Duckett]

Here comes Mr. Einstein over here, wants to do.

[Turner Sparks]

How is that? I'm just trying to figure out what the right answer is.

[Phil Duckett]

First of all, we don't even know the education level this lady. So you over putting her on the spot, doing math with a line full of people.

[Turner Sparks]

Just.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm going to ring you up. Whatever the fucking price says, that's how much.

[Turner Sparks]

Basically what she says, how much it costs.

[Phil Duckett]

What the fuck are we doing here?

[Turner Sparks]

And she goes, it said what? Said I'm like, so is that 50 plus 10 or is it 55? And she goes, it says it's on the side.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

And then she says it twice. And so then I don't ask again. And then she doesn't say a word to me. She brings it, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Rings it up. And then just go like points at the card thing to put my card. It never tells me the final price. So I put it in blind. And then it ended up being 60% off, but also. Okay, so am I in the wrong?

[Phil Duckett]

You're not in the wrong. You're just white.

[Turner Sparks]

This is what I was wondering.

[Phil Duckett]

You're just.

[Turner Sparks]

This is exactly what I need.

[Phil Duckett]

All the questions. I have so many questions. I just want to be thorough.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

I purchase. Meanwhile, they're like, it's a clearance sale, buddy. It's cheaper than whatever it was going to. You were going to pay. Moving along. I've been here since 7am it is.

[Turner Sparks]

Now 6pm it's just 100.

[Phil Duckett]

Leave me the fuck alone and just pay the money.

[Turner Sparks]

This is the energy she gave me.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm out of a job in a week.

[Turner Sparks]

I didn't think of that part. I didn't think that her job might be ending too.

[Joe McRussell]

She's gonna be homeless, and she has to deal with your shit.

[Turner Sparks]

And I'm like, but is it gonna be 49.95 or 51.95?

[Phil Duckett]

You would have gotten on my nerves, especially if it's the end of my shift. I'm like, bro, if you don't just pay, please.

[Turner Sparks]

She did not like me very much.

[Phil Duckett]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, so we're learning. Listen, you gotta. I don't know, Joe. Would you have asked?

[Joe McRussell]

It depends on how long the line is behind me.

[Turner Sparks]

It was about 20.

[Phil Duckett]

And I get real. And I get a lot of anxiety when there's a long line and then I start fumbling or car declines or something, but it's not supposed to decline. Yeah, it makes my. My neck sweat.

[Joe McRussell]

I'm like, oh, Especially those going out of business sales, the TJ Maxx and stuff. There's always.

[Turner Sparks]

They're up to their. They're like. They're stressed out beyond, right?

[Phil Duckett]

And here comes old Jolly Turner. Is this 55 or 60?

[Turner Sparks]

I had my calculator out. Got an advocate.

[Phil Duckett]

The math's not mathing, Turner.

[Joe McRussell]

You might as well have just been wearing what you're wearing right now.

[Phil Duckett]

Hello.

[Turner Sparks]

Hello, Governor.

[Phil Duckett]

That is not Ireland.

[Turner Sparks]

I don't know how to do an Irish accent.

[Phil Duckett]

Just a wee bit.

[Turner Sparks]

Jolly good day to you, sir.

[Phil Duckett]

With the. Dude, the IRA is going to kill us.

[Turner Sparks]

Top of the morning to you.

[Phil Duckett]

Top of the morning.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, we got a lot of questions. Should we get to our black and white advice questions?

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, I mean, might as well. You know, normally we have, like, a guest, so, like, we have to fluff. Not fluff, but expand it. Because we want to get to know them, but we already know each other.

[Turner Sparks]

We don't need guests.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, so. I don't think so.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm sick of guests.

[Phil Duckett]

I don't say that.

[Turner Sparks]

But it's better when it's just us. We don't have to blabbermouth talking all the time.

[Phil Duckett]

All of our people that watch this have been on the show. They're like, really?

[Turner Sparks]

I didn't say they're all. I didn't say it. I didn't say a specific one.

[Phil Duckett]

My boo.

[Turner Sparks]

Hey, easy. That's not who I was.

[Phil Duckett]

He's gonna take back all our listens.

[Turner Sparks]

That's Our biggest, most downloaded episode, by.

[Phil Duckett]

The way, which was crazy because it just started off. It just started taking off.

[Turner Sparks]

We recorded it in, like, December.

[Phil Duckett]

That's where the fact check's gonna come. We're gonna Google his name after the show, make sure he's not incarcerated.

[Turner Sparks]

We got to know what's going on with Navid Mah Boob, because just in the last week we recorded. I. I checked. It came out December 10th, and the. The episode started blowing up, like, five days ago.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

So he might be in prison or he's a famous, or he sold a.

[Phil Duckett]

TV show or he got a late night show in Bangladesh.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, he's like, world famous.

[Phil Duckett]

And, like, that's the intro is this.

[Turner Sparks]

Episode maybe either some. And somehow, for some reason, people are extremely interested in him this week. So thank you. Welcome to all the.

[Phil Duckett]

It's Ramadan, is it? Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

It's not. There's no chance It's Ramadan right now.

[Phil Duckett]

It's Ramadan right now, buddy.

[Turner Sparks]

I thought Ramadan was in the fall.

[Phil Duckett]

No, it's Ramadan now.

[Turner Sparks]

March 17.

[Phil Duckett]

I don't know when it starts, but we're in Ramadan.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, so you think for Ramadan, people listening to Navid Mahboob, they can't eat fasting? Wasn't he not Muslim? I think he was Hindu.

[Phil Duckett]

So it's their enemy.

[Joe McRussell]

We are in Ramadan.

[Phil Duckett]

Thank you.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, we're in Ramadan.

[Joe McRussell]

The 28th to March 29th. Oh, wait, they don't eat for a whole month?

[Phil Duckett]

No, they don't eat and not until the sun goes down.

[Turner Sparks]

They only eat at night.

[Phil Duckett]

Only at night. So they're like, starving the entire day, and then at night they can eat.

[Turner Sparks]

What do they do in Marty Gr if you're Ramada? If you're.

[Phil Duckett]

That's not how that. Well, Marty Gr is an American.

[Turner Sparks]

They don't go to Mar.

[Phil Duckett]

No. But this we're talking about.

[Turner Sparks]

They got to get hungry at Mardi bga.

[Phil Duckett]

Why is Mardi Gras on you? I mean, because it's the same time of year. Mardi Gras literally only celebrated in Alabama and Louisiana in those in that region.

[Turner Sparks]

That's true.

[Phil Duckett]

So it's not like a national thing. And I don't know how many Muslims they got. I'm sure they have a few, but it's not like a major point.

[Turner Sparks]

It's not a big concern.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, they're like, how am I gonna get my beads?

[Turner Sparks]

They can drink liquid, though, right?

[Phil Duckett]

Water. I don't know. Not until after. Not until after.

[Turner Sparks]

They can't Drink water during the day?

[Phil Duckett]

I don't think so.

[Turner Sparks]

Maybe water only check it.

[Phil Duckett]

But I don't even know if they can do water. Water.

[Turner Sparks]

This is the dumbest. This is the most ill informed show.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, they said this is the dumbest holiday. I was like, whoa.

[Turner Sparks]

I mean you and me trying to figure out Ramadan.

[Phil Duckett]

That's why we have Joe to fact check after. But I'm. I don't know if they can do it.

[Turner Sparks]

You know more than I do. I didn't even know it was Ramadan.

[Phil Duckett]

I know.

[Turner Sparks]

So is it a coincidence that Ramadan and Lent are at the exact same time of year?

[Phil Duckett]

No, cuz most relig most religions all come from the same region, same time.

[Turner Sparks]

Does it have to do with like spring in general? And so then they kind of reverse engineered this is the time of year.

[Phil Duckett]

Because spring again, I'm probably the last person you should be asking about this because I'm not Muslim, but this is the show.

[Turner Sparks]

I know, but if we might know about Lent. I don't know about lint.

[Phil Duckett]

I know about lint. I'm giving up weed for Lent.

[Turner Sparks]

Giving up weed for. Are you really?

[Phil Duckett]

When it starts when Ash. Ash Wednesday is this Wednesday.

[Turner Sparks]

So Ash Wednesday's already happened by the time this comes out.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh shit.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. So you're in the middle of lint, so you're two weeks into no weed.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, yeah, I am. That's why I'm so stressed. I'm like, really? That's right. I forgot. So yeah, I will be. I'm two weeks in, I'm on the wagon.

[Turner Sparks]

Feeling good? No, feeling bad.

[Phil Duckett]

I just, you know, anxiety. But you know, I'm, I'm coping through other ways. Working out, masturbation, you know, just really trying to let loose without smoking weed.

[Turner Sparks]

That all helps.

[Phil Duckett]

I think so.

[Turner Sparks]

However you can get through it, you got to get through it.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm pretty nervous. I've never gone 40, 40 days.

[Turner Sparks]

What about boot? You're not giving up booze.

[Phil Duckett]

Well, let's take it one day at a time. Okay?

[Turner Sparks]

Okay.

[Phil Duckett]

I can't. Raw dog life, Turner.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm not there yet.

[Phil Duckett]

And I mean, I gotta have a little crutch sometimes.

[Turner Sparks]

Yes.

[Phil Duckett]

Especially if I'm at a show. I want to be able to have a beer, a drink. Like that's why I'm like, weed is something I do all day, every day. I don't drink at home by myself.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay, so I'm so I don't really need to give it weed something I need to see if I can and.

[Turner Sparks]

The thing is, with weed, you can buy it anywhere. I mean, you can buy it anywhere all the time. But now it's like in the store.

[Phil Duckett]

It's everywhere.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

So it's just like, okay, let's give this do and give a cleanse.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, well, good luck.

[Phil Duckett]

Thanks, buddy. Keep on, keep on fighting the good.

[Turner Sparks]

Keep keeping on yeah, for Jesus, for.

[Phil Duckett]

For my man.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, we're going to get your black and white advice questions. Oh, one thing I want to say, I'm coming this week. I'm in. Let's see. Where am I? Oh, man, it just happened. I was just in Washington and Portland, Oregon doing shows. Oh. Next weekend I'm going to be in Medford, Oregon. I believe that's March 20th and 21st. If you're in Medford, Oregon, come out.

[Phil Duckett]

To the show like a private jet or something. You're in Oregon like once a week?

[Turner Sparks]

No, I go there like twice a year now. For some reason my career is taken off. That was six months ago. That was in October.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, okay.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm going back. I'm doing a couple of shows in Southern Washington and then I'm doing a show with Ari Shafi. Year in Oregon and then these Medford things. But those will have already. Everything except the Medford stuff will have already happened by now.

[Phil Duckett]

You think you'll end up moving back west?

[Turner Sparks]

I don't think so. Yeah. No, there's no chance. Yeah, it likes New York. I like New York.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay.

[Turner Sparks]

But it like more than half my work. California, Oregon, Washington.

[Joe McRussell]

Now when you go to Oregon, do you. When you try to attempt the river, do you just go for it or do you wagon something?

[Turner Sparks]

He's doing an Oregon Trail.

[Joe McRussell]

Do you take the ferry across? Do you wait to see if conditions improve?

[Turner Sparks]

No. Can I tell you this? Last time I was out there, I started talking about the Oregon Trail on stage. It bombed.

[Joe McRussell]

Wow.

[Turner Sparks]

No one either attack and like everyone does it. That old video game, Oregon Trail.

[Phil Duckett]

I know what the Organ Trail. One of my favorite games.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

I just didn't know. He just really went on. When you're passing the river, I'm like.

[Turner Sparks]

I knew exactly what he's talking about because I tried it on stage. It either they've heard it all the time and that it was like hack or. Or they just. I think it might have been a. A small window of. You had to be a certain age to even know what this game is. Third grade. Like no one over 50 knew what I was talking about and no one under 30, 30 maybe knew what I.

[Phil Duckett]

Was Talking about generation, like, we're five years apart. It was that decade.

[Turner Sparks]

It was that little tight thing.

[Joe McRussell]

Yeah, they probably didn't have computers in Oregon back then either.

[Turner Sparks]

That could be.

[Joe McRussell]

I didn't get there till like six years ago.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, Lewis and Clark brought them.

[Phil Duckett]

There's no way Superman that goes to Silicon Valley computers.

[Turner Sparks]

No, they had Nike's from Oregon. They got everything. But it was maybe even 45 and up. Didn't know what I was talking about. It worked for, like, eight People in the audience were laughing out of, like a hundred.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, that's not a good.

[Turner Sparks]

That's a bad way. And that's also. I did it to start. I opened because you open local. You know, you're like, hey. And I'm like, this is gonna kill this Oregon trail. I was digging out of that hole.

[Phil Duckett]

Here we go.

[Turner Sparks]

Digging out of that hole for the next 10 minutes. All right, you guys, we'll be right back with your black and white advice, questions and answers.

[Unknown]

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[Turner Sparks]

Hey, you want to get bonus content, early episodes and have your questions answered on the show?

[Phil Duckett]

Well, Then subscribe to our [e-mail] blackandwhiteadvice and subscribe right now.

[Turner Sparks]

Do it. And we'll give you a shout out on a future episode.

[Phil Duckett]

And I might call you the N word.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, we're back with your black and white advice, questions and answers. The first question comes from Martin in Memphis, Tennessee. Martin says, I'm a 45 year old black guy. Why will white people rescue dogs but not humans? Wow. I have the answer for this.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

So there is a. This is by, by the way, this isn't true for all white people. There's tons of white people give to charity for like, you know, homeless, whatever. But there's a certain type of white person that likes animals more than they like human beings, and that's because they're a bad person. That's just the basic answer there. It's always the. It's always your friend's wife who's like, oh, my God. They work at an animal shelter rescue. And then you meet them and they're just like the biggest asshole you've ever met.

[Phil Duckett]

Nobody wants to be their friend. And dogs can't tell you they hate you.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, dogs have no, they like everybody.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, you can. I mean, you've seen it. You literally. People spank their dog, beating their dog, put their nose in their shit, and the dog three seconds later is like running up back licking them. They forget they have a quick mem. You know, if. Even if you mistreat them, they still love you.

[Turner Sparks]

Yes.

[Phil Duckett]

You know, I mean, yes, humans, we see the flaw in you. You're like, you're a horrible person.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. And there's a type person. When you've struck out with every single human being, the only thing left is like, well, at least he don't have thumbs. Yeah, my animal. I could be. I can be friends with my animal.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

So those are the people. The people. It's. It's the same thing, you know, like the women who say they don't have women friends.

[Phil Duckett]

Those are always red flags.

[Turner Sparks]

Those are. Most women will tell you that's a bad. Don't be friends with that.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, that's a red.

[Turner Sparks]

That's a ref.

[Phil Duckett]

You don't like any women.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, it's like, I just hang out with guys. I like sports. It's like, oh, you can like sports and still have female friends. That's like people who only hang out with dogs. I'm not saying it's just women. There's men like that too.

[Phil Duckett]

There's not just Saying it's white people. There's. I know black people like that.

[Turner Sparks]

What's the old Norm MacDonald bit? That Hitler had a dog. You know, even. Even Hitler's dog liked him.

[Phil Duckett]

That's. That's pretty funny.

[Turner Sparks]

That's it. Yeah. That's a. The norm named the whole special Hitler's dog or whatever it's called. I think it's called Hitler's dog.

[Joe McRussell]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. Anyway, so that's the answer.

[Phil Duckett]

I like that.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. Next question.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Connor in San Jose, California. By the way, has there ever been a black guy named Connor?

[Phil Duckett]

I'm sure.

[Turner Sparks]

I feel like it's a very white name.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm sure there is, but not really. But I'm sure there is one.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Connor says you guys talked about how white guys don't use lotion as much as black guys on a previous episode, which as a white guy, I can attest is true. My question is, what about face wash? My wife started forcing me to use face specific soap three years ago, but before that I never did in my life. How long have black guys been using face wash?

[Phil Duckett]

That's probably something new. Once they started putting the face wash in the soap. And it's a three in one. But most of us weren't just buying face wash on its own, I think. I think more women were doing that. Women were the one who just taught us about that, like, in general. Like, you know, because I was like the type, especially when the trenches, when I'd run out of soap.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

I have been known to use hand soap to wash my body. I'm like, it's still fucking. So. And they're like, are you crazy? But it's always women. They're like, that's so bad for your skin.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm like, but it's not for my hands. Like, I don't. But it does. It makes your skin real tight. And so. But I didn't know that until women started teaching about exfoliating and shit like that. So I don't want to say it was a black. I think women across the board.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay. So women.

[Phil Duckett]

Women were hair with skin care.

[Turner Sparks]

Women.

[Phil Duckett]

We just knew you needed to wash your body with soap. You need to put lotion on after. But the types of soap to use and stuff, that was women.

[Turner Sparks]

Can I tell you, when I was a kid, my family, we used to. We used to wash our hair in a pinch, which happened a lot. We used to wash our hair with dish soap.

[Phil Duckett]

This and this. Why white people always have lice. That's ridiculous. Oh, 100% dawn dish detergent in your hair.

[Turner Sparks]

Detergent in our hair? Ye.

[Phil Duckett]

Whoa.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. You'd put it in the thing. And then cuz we're not. We weren't the most organized family, so you would just run out of stuff.

[Phil Duckett]

Y'all had a community toothbrush. Turner. We.

[Turner Sparks]

We had a community toothbrush.

[Phil Duckett]

We know the family we did have.

[Turner Sparks]

The Sparks had a community toothbrush. And then we would also. Yeah, cuz you would. You'd forget to go, oh, what? Mom's going to go shopping at the grocery store and just forget to pick up shampoo. And it was in our house. A lot of stuff was just kind of no big deal. You go, I know. We'll get it next week. This week we're all doing palm olive or whatever, you know. And so we would just wash our hair with this.

[Phil Duckett]

Just like a film on your hair.

[Turner Sparks]

So then when I grew up and like met my wife, this idea that you needed a different soap for every single, like one for your face, everything was different.

[Phil Duckett]

Right.

[Turner Sparks]

Completely new to me.

[Phil Duckett]

Women.

[Turner Sparks]

Women in general.

[Phil Duckett]

No. Yeah. Women taught you that?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

So some women teach.

[Turner Sparks]

But is that even true or is this just they're trying to make money?

[Phil Duckett]

No, it's definitely true. It is a difference. You know, when you talking face and stuff, you want it to be soft and stuff. Your hands are always rough because you work and stuff like that. So it doesn't have to be so gentle.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

And it's heavy duty. Shit goes on. You want heavy duty so your body's a little more sensitive. I mean, you want a better.

[Turner Sparks]

So I'm still new to that.

[Phil Duckett]

You're new to a lot. I'm starting to learn.

[Turner Sparks]

I might go back to the pot molly one day now my hair's okay now.

[Joe McRussell]

When you were a little kid.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Joe McRussell]

And your parents are washing you with the dish soap. Now would they wash you all at once or they let you soak overnight?

[Phil Duckett]

There he is, Joe the Muscle Russell. When he's not full of whiskey, he's quick.

[Turner Sparks]

Baby Joe McCrussle. He's better as an Irishman.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. Oh my God.

[Turner Sparks]

Ah, that's great. All right, next question.

[Phil Duckett]

Sweating my tits off in this hat.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay. This is George in Portland, Oregon. He says, I'm a white guy, I work and I. One of my close friends at work is an African guy and he's always complaining about black American people. My question is, what do black people think of Africans?

[Phil Duckett]

Let me answer this carefully. So here's the thing. There is sometimes, like, I guess want to say just a Discourse. Is that the right word I'm looking for? No. Anyway, there is sometimes tension between American. But not like. Okay, but like if you were ever a situation. Yeah, like I don't know, the Birmingham boating. I don't know if you remember that when the white people jumped on the black worker and then the whole fucking dock of black people swarmed the white people and started fighting. If it was ever some shit like that where I saw white people bothering an African dude. Yeah, we gonna side with the Africa.

[Turner Sparks]

You still same team.

[Phil Duckett]

You still black. I'm a ride with you.

[Turner Sparks]

So it depends on who the enemy is. Yeah, right.

[Phil Duckett]

It depends on who the enemy is. But like when it just comes to us, like we don't, of course we don't have a problem with their black, but we are completely different. And, and, and, and we know it, they know it. They act like it, we act like it. You know, Africans especially when somebody, they're like, Americans are so lazy and you know, I mean like they, yes, they're constantly. And but the thing is they work there. They work hard as fuck. Like Africans really do. And Americans, we, we came up in a different culture. So it's not that we're lazy, but we ain't immigrants neither. So it's kind of. We already got papers and shit. We kind of comfortable here. This is.

[Turner Sparks]

Immigrants in general have to work harder.

[Phil Duckett]

So black. So African immigrants, they're just disgusted by like how non serious we take shit, how lazy we are. We don't give a fuck. Meanwhile, they're working four jobs because they want to buy a company and you know, bring their family over. So it is just a difference in how we do things. For sure. But, but no, I mean it's, it's all love. But I know some black people, they're like, I don't fuck with Africans. They the one who sold us into slavery to begin with. And it's like, okay, yeah, there's that. You know what I mean? So you have different points of view when it comes to that. They like when I falling for that shit again, it's like, okay, that was quite.

[Turner Sparks]

What about in the dating world? Because I could see if you're a black woman in America, the idea that an African that could, you could go be royalty somewhere. Do you know what I mean?

[Phil Duckett]

At least that's how they sell it to you.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, you could, you could.

[Phil Duckett]

I know, I know, I know a lot of Nigerian princes on Facebook. All right, doesn't necessarily show up in.

[Turner Sparks]

The Congo and all of a sudden there's a castle.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

And you're like, I didn't know we were.

[Phil Duckett]

It's also a genocide going on there, too. So. Yeah, you're the queen of the castle until they come and chop your head off. Because. Yeah. Well, you don't know what part of Africa you're going to.

[Turner Sparks]

That's a good.

[Phil Duckett]

There's really nice parts of Africa and then there's Africa.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

And it's like, what are we doing? You know, I mean, so. And the thing is, I think, what are we doing, man?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

I mean, so you see it all the time, like, because we're. The way they portray Africa in American media. So is mud huts and.

[Turner Sparks]

Well, no, it's kids with eye.

[Phil Duckett]

With flies on their eyeballs and shit. And they're like, for 10 cents a day, yeah, yeah, yeah, you can feed little Botswanae. And it's like. And so that's all you think Africa is. And then you go to Africa, which I've never been, but the pictures from my friends go. And I'm like, wait a minute. They rich.

[Turner Sparks]

Like, this is like, yeah, there's major cities.

[Phil Duckett]

The craziest shit you've ever seen. It's like Wakanda. I'm like, oh, see, but that's the thing. We're so ignorant because we only have what the media gives to us, and most of us aren't world travelers, so we don't ever get to see first. So we only. So we're like, I ain't going to Africa. You ain't sending me back. Yeah, but the people who've been there, they're like, send me the fuck back to Africa.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, there's great cities over there, right?

[Phil Duckett]

Just like anywhere.

[Turner Sparks]

Ye had a cooking. So my wife's a Chinese cooking instructor, and she had somebody. Usually it's a group of people come over, like four or five people. They want to do a birthday party, or she goes out to a company for a team building. She had a lady come by. By herself, one. One person. And it's not cheap to take this class. So she's like, wow, it's kind of crazy. Just one lady's coming in. And the lady was really insistent. She's like, I need to do it tomorrow. I can't do it after tomorrow. Tomorrow's the last day I can do it. So she just put everything together real fast, taught the lady. The lady comes over. I'm forgetting the country, but she had. It was a African lady who has a Chinese restaurant in some major city in Africa. And she's like, I Found you online. I wanted to. I want you to teach me these three specific dishes because I want to add them to my menu at my restaurant. How cool is that?

[Phil Duckett]

That's pretty sick.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. She was pumped. She was like, you'll never believe what I just did.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm on a menu in Africa, a Chinese restaurant. Africa in Africa ran by Africans is.

[Turner Sparks]

Pretty wild, Pretty awesome.

[Phil Duckett]

It's probably. I don't know if I'm. See, that's the thing. When I pick Chinese food, I'm going to place that has the most Asians.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh.

[Phil Duckett]

That's how I pick my Chinese food. If I go into a Chinese restaurant and it's nothing but Nigerians cooking, I'm like, all right. You know what I mean?

[Turner Sparks]

You ever get that white sushi chef I always request? No. I always. No, not happening. There's always that one fat white guy, and the rest of the people are all Japanese. And then he comes over. He's like, hey, I'm Frank. I'll be your sushi chef. He said like, no, no, no. No, you will not.

[Phil Duckett]

No, not even close.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm out of here.

[Phil Duckett]

Frank, that's crazy. Beast might be one of the best ones. You know how they don't accept people into that culture.

[Turner Sparks]

There's the guy. Yeah. He studied in a. Yeah, he was like.

[Phil Duckett]

He learned from the man.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, it's like Mr. Baseball.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. Frank was like, I lived in Japan.

[Turner Sparks]

He was living on Mount Fuji, doing kung fu or whatever. Taekwondo. Those are Chinese and Korean. What's the African one? Karate excuse.

[Phil Duckett]

Karate is not African.

[Turner Sparks]

No, no, sorry. I mean Japanese. Japanese. I'm mixing up my words.

[Phil Duckett]

I'm mixing up karate.

[Turner Sparks]

Anyway, I'm no. I'm no on the white sushi show.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. No, no. I want you to be from that culture.

[Turner Sparks]

Can I tell you one thing, though? A lot of times you go in New York City and I speak Mandarin Chinese, so I can pick up on it. Almost all the sushi chefs are Chinese guys in New York.

[Phil Duckett]

They're not Japanese.

[Turner Sparks]

No. They're sort of pretending to be Japanese. I mean, they're not saying it out loud. I'm Japanese. But they're playing off the ignorance of American people that we don't.

[Phil Duckett]

We have no idea.

[Turner Sparks]

Aren't going to know the difference.

[Phil Duckett]

And we don't.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. And we don't. And these guys are making a killing.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. You could put a Korean back there.

[Turner Sparks]

I'm like, sushi is just as much from Texas as it is from China. It has nothing to do with the.

[Phil Duckett]

Country, but it's so close.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, but it's a. It's a world away. China, Japan, well, they're separated by an ocean.

[Phil Duckett]

It's like saying, wow, I really gotta get my geography up. China is not neighbors with Japan.

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, I guess they're.

[Phil Duckett]

I thought it was an island off the coast.

[Turner Sparks]

No, it's its own island. And then you got. Yeah, you have China. But they're just two separate countries separated by the East China Sea, which is an ocean. I mean, it's the size. It's like saying Jamaica and the United States are the same place. It's that far away, if. Maybe even further.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay, so.

[Turner Sparks]

Okay, so if you had a bunch of. I don't know what it would be, but, like, American people sort of pretending to be Jamaican just because people wouldn't know the difference.

[Phil Duckett]

Chad Hanks, literally.

[Turner Sparks]

There you go. If Chad Hanks was cooking chicken, we'd be pissed. And no one really.

[Phil Duckett]

But his accent was. He's like, they'll never get it.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Just like.

[Turner Sparks]

That's basically what these Chinese sushi chefs are talking about.

[Phil Duckett]

Okay.

[Joe McRussell]

You could put a Filipino guy back there. No one noticed.

[Turner Sparks]

You could probably even.

[Phil Duckett]

He's just pretty tan.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, that's what we would think.

[Joe McRussell]

Is that his name?

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, boy. Pretty tan.

[Phil Duckett]

Is that his name?

[Joe McRussell]

I have one more question about the Africans and the black guys. I think a huge difference is African guys, like soccer.

[Turner Sparks]

Love soccer.

[Joe McRussell]

Because regular black Americans don't like soccer, right?

[Phil Duckett]

No, no. We're not really into it. You know, I mean, it's the truth. But soccer is like. I mean, soccer is like the biggest sport in the world. We just, in America, don't fuck with it.

[Turner Sparks]

Americans in general don't like it, but white people have gotten into it. And I know why.

[Phil Duckett]

Why some. They can still play.

[Turner Sparks]

It's a. It's a fascination with Western Europe, like England and that stuff and wanting. It's a way to show that you're cultured among the white community to other white people. Oh, it's like, oh, you don't like Mbappe?

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. You. What?

[Turner Sparks]

You really. Did you see what Bobby did last week?

[Phil Duckett]

Gotcha. It's a way for them to fit in and have something to talk about.

[Turner Sparks]

It's a way to kind of feel like there's people white. There's white people who don't want. They're the type of person who says, I don't watch sports. Do you know those people?

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah.

[Turner Sparks]

Because they want to pretend like that means they read books.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, I know these people all too well.

[Turner Sparks]

They're the worst people.

[Phil Duckett]

I agree.

[Turner Sparks]

They're the worst people on earth. They're like. I don't. Oh, sports ball. Oh, wow. Is there a. What? It's Super Bowl. Okay. Sports people, you know, but then they'll watch soccer. And it's not the sport they don't like. It's that they think you're dumber if you watch American sports, but somehow you're a genius if you watch soccer.

[Phil Duckett]

So the people I was thinking about, they don't watch any sports because they're readers and. Anyway, moving on.

[Turner Sparks]

Are you talking about a specific person?

[Phil Duckett]

A specific family?

[Turner Sparks]

Got it. Yeah, got it. Well, I'm taught there's guys who will. Pacific Northwest. You'll get this a lot. Like Seattle, Portland. There's guys out there who. They're literally in antifa. You know, But. But also they're into soccer. The antifa people usually do not cross over with being football fans or, like, they're not into the Portland Trailblazers, but for some reason they're super into soccer because they think it. It elevates their status.

[Phil Duckett]

I just. I just think it's kind of boring. That's why I don't. Like. I've watched. It's hard to get into 90 minutes. I mean, it's a huge field, and you're lucky if they score a goal. A piece.

[Turner Sparks]

Like one. Nothing.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah, one.

[Turner Sparks]

One.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, man. And there's.

[Turner Sparks]

I mean, I can get into it if there's nothing else going on, but.

[Phil Duckett]

I watched the World Cup. I watched the World cup because that's when normally, like, everybody's playing hard and it's like, oh, shit. You know, I'm rooting for America and shit, but I don't really have no skin in the game. But, you know, that's what. I'll watch that. But, yeah. Like, just regular games. There's a bar across the street from where I work, and it's like a soccer bar.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

And it's. I mean, sometimes it's 8am and it is packed out.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. It's the afternoon over there or something. Or the.

[Phil Duckett]

But you're in New York. I'm like, where do y'all work?

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah.

[Phil Duckett]

Where it's 8am and you're banging beers watching a soccer game.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, on like a weekday. Yeah. I don't know what they're doing.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, man. I see it all this while.

[Turner Sparks]

I try. Every year I try. I try because it. Soccer starts, like, maybe a month before football. College football. NFL football. So I'll. I'll be like, you Know what? This year I'm going to do it. I'm going to get into. So I'm going to join Antifa. I'm getting into soccer. Here we go. I'm going full white. And then the second football season starts. I'm like, yeah, I think I'm done.

[Phil Duckett]

I think I'll cut on a baseball game before I watch soccer.

[Turner Sparks]

That's a big ask.

[Phil Duckett]

Nah, I like now with the pitch.

[Turner Sparks]

Clock, I think probably.

[Phil Duckett]

And that's what it is. I watch baseball more now because the games are a lot quicker. And I've always liked baseball if I'm going to the game. I've never liked watching baseball on tv.

[Turner Sparks]

Well, soccer at a game is pretty great.

[Phil Duckett]

Well, I bet if I went to, like, Arsenal's game, like. Yeah, you would be, probably. Yeah. Because it's fun. But, yeah, watching on tv, I'm just like, I don't understand.

[Turner Sparks]

All right, that's the episode.

[Phil Duckett]

Oh, wait.

[Turner Sparks]

A White Lies and Dark Truth.

[Joe McRussell]

We got a lot, guys.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah, we were shooting from the hip boy, so I don't think we got anything right.

[Joe McRussell]

You guys. I think Phil said there's 150 black people in Ireland. There's actually about 67,000, give or take a few. Yeah. Yep. So there's one, the McDonald's brothers. They were Irish. They're Irish Roman Catholic.

[Turner Sparks]

Oh, I nailed it. I guessed. I just guessed because the red hair of Ronald.

[Joe McRussell]

Yep. They founded McDonald's in San Bernardino, California in 1940, and then Ray Kroc bought McDonald's from the McDonald's brothers in 1961 for $2.7 million.

[Turner Sparks]

Wow.

[Joe McRussell]

So we're talking about podcasts. According to the podcast host.com, the top 5% of podcasts have around 1,101 listeners.

[Turner Sparks]

We're almost there a week.

[Joe McRussell]

Yeah. Yep.

[Turner Sparks]

And then the top thousand, we're at 800. Yeah. We're almost in the top five.

[Joe McRussell]

And the top 1% have around 4700.

[Turner Sparks]

We could get there.

[Phil Duckett]

We could get there in a couple of years.

[Turner Sparks]

We'll probably be there by the end of this year. We'll be in the top 1%. Okay, that's only. We only have to get four times bigger. We've already gotten 20.

[Phil Duckett]

That's true. Yeah. Okay.

[Joe McRussell]

And Phil is right. No Muslims are allowed to drink water during daylight hours while fasting for Ramadan. However, they may drink more water at night to make up for lost fluids.

[Phil Duckett]

But imagine being parched and you have 12 hours before you can take a sip.

[Turner Sparks]

I used to run cross country in high school with a guy who would.

[Phil Duckett]

Do that during Ramadan.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. I didn't realize he wasn't drinking water.

[Phil Duckett]

Yeah. So he was literally.

[Turner Sparks]

He was running five miles.

[Phil Duckett]

Superhuman.

[Turner Sparks]

Yeah. And then just like, I'm good. Going home and waiting for the sun to go down.

[Phil Duckett]

Dude. I would saud.

[Turner Sparks]

Habas. Shout out, saud.

[Phil Duckett]

I would be no good. Oh, my God. No water. I would be just ruined.

[Turner Sparks]

He was still faster than me.

[Phil Duckett]

Of course he was.

[Turner Sparks]

That's it, everybody. Patreon subscribers, stick around. Everybody else, Happy St. Patrick's Day. Have a great one. And stay black.

[Phil Duckett]

Yes, sir.

[Turner Sparks]

You've got a question but you're scared to ask? Just drop the boys a message? Cause they're up to the task?

[Phil Duckett]

They're all in the dice?

[Turner Sparks]

They ain't always nice? But you can't think twice?

[Phil Duckett]

Black and white advice?

[Turner Sparks]

Black and white advice? Dear old work platform.

[Phil Duckett]

It's not you, it's us.

[Turner Sparks]

Actually, it is you. Endless onboarding, constant IT bottlenecks. We've had enough. We need a platform that just gets us. And to be honest, we've met someone new. They're called Monday.com and it was love at first onboarding. Their beautiful dashboards, their customizable workflows got us floating on a digital cloud nine. So no hard feelings, but we're moving on. Monday dot com, the first work platform you'll love to use.

[Unknown]

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