← Black People Love Paramore
Black People Love Paramore
Spring Break
00:49:24
On this week’s episode, co-hosts Sequoia Holmes and Ryan Gilyard talk about SPRING BREAK! They reminisce about college days, spring break horror stories, and how youth culture has shifted when it comes to occasion. All this & more!
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- [00:21]
A
Welcome to Black People Love Paramore, a podcast not about the band Paramore, but a show about the common and uncommon interests of of black people in order to help the community feel a little bit more seen.
- [00:34]
B
Sorry, do you know that meme?
- [00:36]
A
Yes, I do. Do you?
- [00:38]
B
I do watch Housewives, so. Okay, I'm throwing it off.
- [00:41]
A
I'm Sequoia. I'm Ryan. And welcome to this wonderful little show that we put on. First things first, Mocha Grande's out there. I've been making pictures to you all, but you already know there's a shirt and the link for you down below. Find in the description box, all that great stuff. Please take a second to rate and review this podcast. If you're watching it on YouTube, drop a comment, say hi to us, let us know that you're there. And if you are rating and reviewing on Spotify, Apple Music. Five stars only because we are five star. We're deal. Gotti. I always forget to mention silly a little bit. We have a shirt that says that.
- [01:17]
B
Yeah. Oh, wait, this is five star.
- [01:19]
A
Yes, it says five star. It was only for five star.
- [01:22]
B
I love this.
- [01:23]
A
Yes.
- [01:23]
B
How have I never seen this shirt?
- [01:24]
A
So that's also gonna be in the link below.
- [01:26]
B
Oh, oh, I. I want one of these.
- [01:28]
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get you a five star picture. Yeah.
- [01:30]
B
So that's a Irv Gotti thing. Why do I think that was? Why did I think that was a Nicholas Minaj?
- [01:36]
A
She was on the song she speaks.
- [01:38]
B
Yo Gotti.
- [01:39]
A
Yes.
- [01:40]
B
Not Irv Gotti. Who is Irv Gotti?
- [01:42]
A
Irv Gotti? Yeah, he like murdering and Y is a rapper. That's a five star bitch. That's a five star.
- [01:52]
B
I'm gonna. Sorry again. I often remember that. I'm whitewashed. I thought that that was not Birdman. Somewhere in that vein.
- [02:00]
A
Okay.
- [02:00]
B
That's who I thought it was.
- [02:01]
A
I think maybe I do understand how you are.
- [02:04]
B
They sound similar. Okay, they don't is what you're saying.
- [02:06]
A
Yeah, but I do. I know how you get to Nikki. Cuz you know, she that's. I just had an epiphany. I need to go to Tiffany's. Right? Yes.
- [02:14]
B
Right, right. That was when her early her come up days.
- [02:17]
A
Five little mama. You're a three star. I'm not sleeping when I say I'm in my dream car. I don't know what she says after the ice Barbie. I'm hot. I think it's time I put the rice. Yeah. Anyways, so if you want a five stars only for five star bitches Shirt that's also down in the description box below.
- [02:38]
B
We should send one to Nicki Minaj.
- [02:40]
A
We should, we should. She would sue us.
- [02:42]
B
You think? I don't know.
- [02:44]
A
She's weird lately. Yes, yes.
- [02:47]
B
It is either a lawsuit or absolutely love it, and there's no in between. Yeah, yeah, but she might love. There's the chance maybe. There's the chance maybe. But you. Oh, never mind. Because the barbs are insane.
- [02:58]
A
And I don't know, Like, I don't even. I don't even. I don't know. I don't want. I don't want any parts, in fact. Right, okay, but we're not here to talk about Nick Minaj. We're here to talk about spring beret spring break. Because it is spring break season. It is right now. Me and Ryan just went to spring break. It was my. And Jules not here, but yes, Jewel was with us as well. It was my first spring break. It was the unwell spring break. It was a good time. It was in Miami. My first time in Miami. My first time spring break at 30.
- [03:30]
B
I love that you waited until adulthood to actually. That's a responsible way to do it.
- [03:34]
A
Thank you.
- [03:35]
B
You did the smart thing.
- [03:35]
A
Thank you. And shockingly, it was a lot of people's theirs first time doing spring break. Like, we interviewed a lot of the influencers there, a lot of whatever. And lots of folks were like, oh, it's my first spring break. It's my first spring break. And I feel like spring break actually went out of style. That because it was so many people. Spring. First spring break, I was like, oh, it went. It went out of style.
- [03:52]
B
Absolutely.
- [03:52]
A
Yeah.
- [03:52]
B
Well. And I guess I forget that, like, I'm like, a couple of years older than you. We didn't go to high school together. I'm just a couple of years. Just a few years stupid. I forget that I'm like, I am, like, squarely millennial in a way that you're like a zillennial.
- [04:09]
A
Right.
- [04:10]
B
And so I was like, peak college frat spring break era. So, like, to me, I'm like, first. But I forget that, like, a lot of, like, especially in the unwell pool, are younger. Like, they're.
- [04:20]
A
They're even. They're Gen Z proper. I'm a customer who definitely leans millennial. If a lot of people tell it because I'm old. Yeah, they're not. They're like Gen Z Pepper, and they, like, did not go to spring break. Like, oh, yeah, spring break. Maybe had a bad PR or something. Like, sure. Like, wasn't the thing to do anymore. And I'm not quite sure why that is. Why do you think the spring break, I wonder?
- [04:44]
B
I like, I think there's a level of this ethereal spring break, like, like the 80s, like through the early 2000s, that is like party city. Like, you're drunk, blackout, blah, blah, blah, blah. I think the social media of it all, like, everything is recorded all the time now. So, like, when I went on spring break, yeah, we maybe we had like cameras. You even. We have Facebook and Instagram, but it wasn't the way it is now.
- [05:05]
A
Right.
- [05:05]
B
So you kind of have anonymity in a way now if you're on spring break, your spring break is broadcast to everyone. And so I think you're just more. You're probably more anxious.
- [05:14]
A
No, you know what? That makes sense. And I wonder if it has something to do with how Gen Z doesn't drink.
- [05:19]
B
Right? Right.
- [05:20]
A
At this nearly at the same rate as millennials and Gen X drinks. Right? Because, you know, spring break, the whole thing about it was going there and getting like blacked out, sloppy ass drunk. Right.
- [05:31]
B
Let me tell you.
- [05:31]
A
And then, and then you go and you're really fudgeing drunk, and then you wake up in the morning, you're on somebody's fucking Instagram. So you're going viral on TikTok for some shit that you did that you had no idea that you did. I'm sure the anxiety that Gen Z experiences probably prevents them from doing stuff like spring break. If you are Gen Z, confirm or deny in the comments. Yeah.
- [05:50]
B
I'm curious. Yeah. Why do you think you are. Like, you personally didn't go to spring break. I am curious. Or if you did, tell me what the Gen Z spring break is like, right? Is it still party central?
- [05:59]
A
Because, you know, it can't be fun.
- [06:00]
B
I don't know. Maybe, maybe, maybe it might be a different kind of fun.
- [06:03]
A
Right?
- [06:03]
B
Not Argon.
- [06:04]
A
Not right.
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B
My millennial spring girl. Let me tell you, I had.
- [06:08]
A
Did you have a time?
- [06:09]
B
Yeah.
- [06:10]
A
Wait, I'm sorry. Before we get into your spring break, last thing is Girls Gone Wild.
- [06:17]
B
Oh, wow.
- [06:17]
A
Girls Gone Wild.
- [06:19]
B
I forgot about that until then. And you know what? Maybe that also. Wow, this is all hitting me right now.
- [06:23]
A
Girls Gone Wild. And then there was an offshoot, Wild Party Girls. Same. I don't remember, but it was, you know, a different brand. But essentially, you know, it was two production companies going down to wherever spring work was in Florida and capturing drunk girls who allegedly had to be 18, flashing their titties 100%. And now it feels like that would be way more of an issue in the era of social media. Yes.
- [06:49]
B
And I also feel like porn is so much more readily available that that can't. That business model can't be great anymore. Like, sorry, me trying to make a. Talking about the business model, but there's. I. I listened to a podcast about the history of Girls Gone Wild and they did do some. Yeah, they do some.
- [07:04]
A
What podcast was it?
- [07:05]
B
I think it is like you can Google, like, because it's like a off series. Like, it is about that and it's about the men who started it and.
- [07:12]
A
Like how they're little.
- [07:13]
B
Yes. Yeah, it's about him and like, and how they like got around doing it by giving T shirts. Something about giving the T shirt is.
- [07:19]
A
How they got around not paying action thing.
- [07:21]
B
Yeah. Something made it fine.
- [07:22]
A
Like how when places don't have an alcohol license, instead they sell tickets.
- [07:26]
B
Exactly, exactly.
- [07:27]
A
Tickets. And that you can go with your ticket.
- [07:29]
B
Right. Also, we have a. My special guest.
- [07:32]
A
Our special guest is Meatball.
- [07:34]
B
Hold this.
- [07:34]
A
Hi, Meatball.
- [07:36]
B
Yeah, my little.
- [07:36]
A
You want to speak? Say hi, mama. Say hi.
- [07:38]
B
She's. Oh, maybe.
- [07:41]
A
There we go. Yes, yes.
- [07:43]
B
People watching on YouTube that, yes, my puppy is here.
- [07:45]
A
Yes. And my kitty, Chanel has promptly escaped to the bedroom exit.
- [07:52]
B
Stage left.
- [07:52]
A
Yeah, she has the exit of stage left. Absolutely. And I really want to see them interact.
- [07:56]
B
But Meatball was having a meltdown.
- [07:58]
A
It was way too excited. She came on too strong. And Chanel said, you gotta play it cool. You gotta play it cool with a cat.
- [08:05]
B
Smells too cool, you know?
- [08:06]
A
Right.
- [08:06]
B
But no. Yeah, but I think this talking about Girls Gone Wild, I think that clicked in my brain why Spring break probably went out of style.
- [08:13]
A
Yeah.
- [08:13]
B
I think in the last couple of years we are definitely shifting away from the manosphere. Oh, sorry. Yes. And no tv like traditional media because like when like MTV spring break of it all, which we'll get into, it was out around the same time. Like the man show. Like, there was a lot of like, you don't remember that show. That's like where like John Stewart, they're like very popular, like late night host now who came from like, I think Stephen Colbert also was like a host on the man show. So they were like these shows that were very like late night men kind of raunchy comedy things. And so then I think spring break came out of that because it's also like the kind of cops. Like we're doing some voyeurism of like just like the worst people. No no.
- [08:54]
A
Yeah. And I think I hated that genre of television like Cops.
- [08:59]
B
But I think Spring Break, the show was a derivative of that. And then once we kind of got.
- [09:04]
A
Out of that, MTV Spring Break was.
- [09:06]
B
A derivative of that cleaned up version of, like, raunchy TV. Got it.
- [09:10]
A
And I think, like, Spike TV.
- [09:11]
B
Exactly.
- [09:12]
A
Do you remember Spike TV 100 it feels like something that would live on Spike TV, like today. MTV definitely feels like if it didn't live on mtv, it was definitely getting on Spike. It might have been syndicated to Spike for all we know.
- [09:25]
B
Yeah.
- [09:26]
A
Like, yeah.
- [09:26]
B
MTV literally just took a week. It was like, oh, yeah. But if you went to Spike, it was there all the time.
- [09:30]
A
100.
- [09:30]
B
And I think that now we live in an era is, like, much more. When I say female focused. I mean, sometimes I feel so gross saying female. But I mean, like, it is more focused on, like, women not being objects in terms of media. And I think that. That if you look at any of the MTV stuff, it's just like, hot girls doing whatever Carmen Electra it is. And no shade to Carmen Electra, girl, Come up, do your thing. But it's like, literally, like, I am hot. Being kind of, like, provocative. And I think that that type of TV went out of style. And so then kids weren't watching it. And so, like, going to spring break didn't feel as like, I have to do this thing where for us growing up, or at least, like, maybe me sort a little bit because I'm a little older. Like, I remember seeing it on TV as a kid and being like, oh, yeah. This is like a thing that, like, you do when you go to college.
- [10:16]
A
You go to spring break.
- [10:17]
B
Yeah.
- [10:17]
A
Yeah. But that's. You know, it might have just been the college that I went to, but I didn't go to a very spirited college. I went to UC Santa Cruz. And we didn't have a football team. We didn't have. We had a rugby team. And it was D1. And that was the only D1 sport that we had at the school. Everything else was D3. But. Or we did not have it interesting. We didn't have fraternity life. We didn't have Greek life. Maybe, like, a little bit. But, like, definitely not in large part at all. And so spring break was definitely not something I remember anybody ever talking about. It was kind of like, first spring break when the school closed. Yeah. You went home. You just went like.
- [10:49]
B
I don't remember trips.
- [10:50]
A
No.
- [10:51]
B
I also. I've always wondered, like, because I'm from. I'm from Missouri originally. So like we would go to like the south where we would go to like Panama City beach or Gulf Shores or like. Right, yeah. Florida or. Or Tex. I went to Texas, I went to Florida and I went to Georgia. So like you would, you would kind of go. And that felt very. You would meet up with the southern schools and I always. As in like you would like the Auburns or like the big.
- [11:12]
A
In the south celebrating spring break, we.
- [11:15]
B
Would go to school and there's just a bunch of other schools there. And I've always wondered how the west coast did it. Cuz we all did it cuz we didn't have a beach. You all literally live at the beach.
- [11:22]
A
No, that was my whole thing. When we went to Miami for unwell spring break, I was like, how the did Florida become like beat out California for spring break city?
- [11:34]
B
I think politics, you think?
- [11:37]
A
Just like you're not fair. If you want underage drinking and like wild, you know, unadulterated sex and all that, then it definitely gives Florida. But also somebody responded to me and said because the water is warmer in Florida, because it's cold in California, the Pacific Ocean is cold. I was like, okay, that makes sense. And it's more likely to be warm in Florida at that time of year than it is than it is here in California also.
- [12:00]
B
You've been to the beaches here. I don't feel like the beaches here like party like that. Or maybe I don't.
- [12:04]
A
Yeah, they don't. I mean. Yeah, not. Not to my knowledge. Yeah.
- [12:06]
B
I'm like, you don't kind of go out like. I feel like people kind of sit on the beach and relax.
- [12:09]
A
Yeah, you're not partying on the beach here unless you're doing a bonfire.
- [12:13]
B
But even then it's not like a party 100 chill.
- [12:16]
A
Life. Life in California definitely is different than life in Florida. So yeah, that makes sense.
- [12:22]
B
We're like.
- [12:23]
A
But yeah, so like what. What's my interest in going to Florida.
- [12:25]
B
When I you're here?
- [12:26]
A
Why see the world when you got the beach?
- [12:30]
B
Hey, Frank Ocean.
- [12:31]
A
That's the whole thing.
- [12:32]
B
Frank Ocean.
- [12:32]
A
Why I see the world when you got the beach? Sweet life.
- [12:35]
B
I'm into this. You do have a sweet life.
- [12:37]
A
Yeah. And I went to school in Santa Cruz, which is also like a beach city.
- [12:40]
B
Oh, is it really? I've never been.
- [12:41]
A
It's a beach city. And then the schools and the forest just like next to the beach.
- [12:45]
B
Oh, wow. This sounds like a heavenly space you would love.
- [12:48]
A
I can't believe. I actually can't believe that we haven't gone. We need to go.
- [12:52]
B
Go back to. Do you go to reunions? Do you have reunions?
- [12:54]
A
I mean. Yes, question mark. But we haven't had our 10 year yet. It would be next year. It'll be next year.
- [13:00]
B
I really. It doesn't matter. We don't talk about mine. I've had my tenure, and it scared me.
- [13:04]
A
You went.
- [13:04]
B
No, I didn't go.
- [13:05]
A
But it was.
- [13:06]
B
It happened last year and you didn't go. I guess I'm assuming they did it. I did not go. No. But, like, my. My pledge class, we had, like, a group chat about it. I was in a frat, so that was the other reason why I went to spring break.
- [13:14]
A
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Fraternity definitely feels like it's like, you're going to spring. Right.
- [13:18]
B
The other thing is, I don't know how the unwell one. So I. As an adult, I have money, so I paid to go. And like, to me, I'm like, oh, it was like. It was inexpensive, but this is affordable. I'm like, wow, I'm glad that I'm an adult with a salary who can do this, Right. I am thinking about if anyone was there that was in college. I'm like, how the fuck did you.
- [13:33]
A
I agree.
- [13:35]
B
I could have never.
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A
Never. Right.
- [13:37]
B
Like, the way we did spring break, right?
- [13:39]
A
Like, that's gonna bring you a couple bands.
- [13:41]
B
Yes.
- [13:41]
A
Yeah. And I don't know whose parents are giving them a couple bands to go on spring break.
- [13:46]
B
We were. We would sell books to go to spring break.
- [13:48]
A
Oh, my goodness.
- [13:49]
B
Absol.
- [13:50]
A
Or fund. You would.
- [13:52]
B
No, the frat didn't fund it. We. So the frat had formals that, like, we paid dues to go to formals, which were kind of like mini spring breaks. We got banned from a hotel once. Table Rock Lake. We did. We were, like, broke into the. We broke into the hotel's basement and, like, took out their per. Like, the families had personal things there. Like, they were like bowling balls. It was insane. We, like, ruined cabins. It was a. I'm so sorry. The bearded.
- [14:14]
A
Why did their family have personal things in the hotel?
- [14:17]
B
That was dumb of them, right?
- [14:18]
A
That feels very strange to me. You know, boys will be boys.
- [14:21]
B
It. You know, again, unfortunately.
- [14:23]
A
Just kidding, because clearly you have to be very clear for the Internet.
- [14:26]
B
That was a joke. That is true.
- [14:27]
A
The joke of it is that it's ridiculous. It is.
- [14:29]
B
And I. I wasn't a white frat, so, you know, that. That is. That was kind of. We had to just return the things we stole.
- [14:34]
A
Stole. Y'. All was things.
- [14:36]
B
Wow. Bad, bro.
- [14:38]
A
It was.
- [14:38]
B
Yeah, we were.
- [14:39]
A
It was.
- [14:40]
B
It was not a good time for our fraternity. I remember our president literally, like. Yeah, we. We were put on probation by the school. It was like.
- [14:46]
A
It was like a whole.
- [14:47]
B
Yeah, it was a scam. It was a. It was a.
- [14:48]
A
That is insane. But see how you can act drunk and belligerent as spring, you know, at mini spring break. Sp.
- [14:54]
B
Yeah. So that same. That's the energy we bring to spring break.
- [14:56]
A
Yeah.
- [14:56]
B
So imagine that times a million. Where are we at? Sorry.
- [15:00]
A
You know, we might as well get in the craziest spring break story.
- [15:03]
B
Okay.
- [15:03]
A
We're talking about Unwell spring break, where Ryan. Yeah.
- [15:07]
B
Okay.
- [15:07]
A
Jumped into the pool. Oh.
- [15:09]
B
Lol.
- [15:09]
A
At the party, the only person in the pool, literally.
- [15:13]
B
Yeah.
- [15:13]
A
Kept almost all his clothes on. Hannah, my co host on the Daily Dirty, convinced him to take off his pants at the last minute before.
- [15:20]
B
God.
- [15:21]
A
She did. Because I was like, why would you take off your pants?
- [15:23]
B
Because walking home with my pants wet would have been.
- [15:25]
A
Was gonna be weird for you to be pantsless.
- [15:27]
B
No one seems to care in public. No one is seeing. No, I was literally in my skivvies. And, like, everyone's kind of like underwear. Sorry, do you not say skivvies out here?
- [15:34]
A
Never heard that.
- [15:35]
B
I was in my skivvies. And yeah, no one seems to notice or care. Also because Alex. Alex Cooper was there. She was on the mic and she was like, hey, why is nobody in the pool? Which prompted me to be like, oh, yes. And you know what's funny? Like, you have a moment in your head where you're like, this is a movie moment. Gonna jump in the pool. Everyone's gonna join.
- [15:50]
A
Yes.
- [15:50]
B
No one joined.
- [15:52]
A
No one else jumped in that pool. Because everybody else was pussy. Like, getting a boy. But Also, again, we're 30. You know what I mean? And when you're 21, 22, you're so worried about looking a certain way or whatever. Oh, you think? I do. I do. I think it's just like, you know, like that. Crippling. Especially growing up in the social media age, like, we're talking about cameras everywhere. It's just like a crippling. Like, do I do it? I don't know. And then because you.
- [16:19]
B
They would have needed a bunch of other people to also do it to then make it okay. But one person doing it. It's like, huh.
- [16:23]
A
Right. Right.
- [16:24]
B
Yeah, that's fair.
- [16:25]
A
Right?
- [16:25]
B
So that was flirting lifeguard, too. Who clearly was not. He was. He had great skin.
- [16:29]
A
He did. He looks like A really nice man.
- [16:31]
B
Very sweet.
- [16:32]
A
And he was, like, very amused by you. Y' all had, like, a little rapport going on. I thought he was gonna give you his hat, but I really was sure.
- [16:38]
B
That was the damn hat.
- [16:39]
A
I was like, oh, he had a really cute hat.
- [16:41]
B
And they were. Yeah, because I guess they. He was working and they got cool.
- [16:43]
A
Yeah.
- [16:44]
B
God damn it. But yeah.
- [16:45]
A
And they didn't give you what's like a wild spring break story.
- [16:48]
B
A wild spring break story. So, like. Okay, I'm gonna tell you about the time we got to a hotel. It was in Panama City. No, this was out South Padre island in Texas.
- [17:00]
A
Okay.
- [17:01]
B
So you drive 10 hours to get there. It's like a terrible time. And then, like, we are probably 10 people to a two part, two bedroom suite.
- [17:09]
A
Okay.
- [17:10]
B
So it's like a lot of boys, 10 people, like. And like, we're mostly. Because that's poor. We're poor college students. So we, like, pile up in this, like, suite. And then. I've told you this before, but, like, the beginning of the week, the pool, the hot tub was clear. It was fine. It was fun. And then, like, we keep getting in. Obviously, people have drinks by the end of the week. It was like a murky brown.
- [17:29]
A
Oh, we kept getting in there.
- [17:31]
B
So that's like a. That's like a random. Like, over the week. I. I mean, I'm. Many a drunken night stumbling home. Yeah. There's a traumatic experience. It's not traumatic, but it was like. I remember there was a. I had just recently come out and there was this other person who'd be like, I.
- [17:45]
A
Know you came out in college or in grad school.
- [17:46]
B
It was, I guess, in my senior year.
- [17:48]
A
Okay. Senior college. Okay, so you just recently come out.
- [17:51]
B
Senior of college and just. They were like, oh, I have a gay friend. Who. A girl there. A girl that we had met at spring break was like, I have a gay friend. And literally, it was just another game.
- [17:59]
A
Of course. Of course.
- [18:01]
B
This man walks into the room. He literally looks at me and goes, no. And walks out of the room traumatizing. That was a trauma.
- [18:09]
A
Yeah. Was he a white man?
- [18:10]
B
Of course he was. And that's also the insane thing about it is I'm like, well, sir, I also am not.
- [18:15]
A
Hello. I was not.
- [18:18]
B
You would have come in here and.
- [18:19]
A
Excited, and I would have had some cool.
- [18:21]
B
Yeah, yeah.
- [18:21]
A
But I would. You know what I mean?
- [18:23]
B
But I was not, like, trust me.
- [18:26]
A
Yeah.
- [18:27]
B
I'm trying to think of, like, wild, wild stories. Like, I feel like I. I'm Fair.
- [18:32]
A
I'm not.
- [18:33]
B
I go out and have a good time, but I don't have, like, a moment where I'm like, oh, this was like. I don't know. Does that make sense?
- [18:39]
A
Yeah, no, no, that's only makes sense. You know what? I don't have any wild spring break stories, but I can tell y' all about my 22nd BIR. Please do. Which, you know, my birthday is in June. I was turning 22, and I lived in D.C. at the time, but I needed to come back home to walk for my college graduation. I graduated early while I was living in D.C. and my graduation was, you know, the following June. And my birthday is right around the time of graduation. Always right. So I come home to LA to celebrate my birthday before I fly up to the Bay Area to walk in my college graduation.
- [19:11]
B
Understood. Wow.
- [19:12]
A
Maybe it was the other way around. I. I. Whatever.
- [19:14]
B
Sure, sure, sure.
- [19:15]
A
Graduation came first, and then it was my birthday. For my 22nd birthday, I'm like, okay, we're gonna go out to this bar in Long Beach. I'm gonna invite all of my friends. It's gonna be a good time. Tommy, my best friend's with me, and I'm pregaming before I go to the bar. Hot. Me and Tommy are in my childhood bedroom. My mom doesn't know that I drink. Like, whatever. It's just me and Tommy, we got these little ass bottles of, you know, the small bottles of alcohol.
- [19:42]
B
Drinking, like, shooters.
- [19:43]
A
Yes. Yeah, I'm drinking, like, three. I take, like, three of those.
- [19:46]
B
Do you remember what it was?
- [19:47]
A
I'm sure it was vodka. It was either vodka or tequila. I was. I was heavy a tequila girl at that time, so it might have been tequila. Take a few of those. And then we had an Uber. We head to the club. I have on this cute onesie. It's sheer at the top. Hot. Very cute. Still think it was very cute. Get there, everybody's there, and they're like, oh, Sequoia, we're gonna buy you drinks. And I'm like, okay. Everybody and their mom buys me a drink. I black out probably within the first hour. Yeah. I don't remember the rest of the night, but Tommy tells me that I was so drunk that they had to call an Uber and take me home. And the Uber driver was like, oh, no, she has alcohol poisoning. Like, she. Oh, my God, you guys need to take her to the hospital. And I just kept saying that I had to pee. I had to pee. And then I tried to open the door on the freeway in Order to pee to get out the freeway, you know, he pulls over on the side of the freeway. I get out of the car, go up into, like, the embankment or whatever, take off my entire onesie. Because, mind you, I have on one. So my whole titties is out hot into this. Whatever.
- [20:45]
B
I'm in public on the middle of the street. Your boobs are out.
- [20:48]
A
Not in the middle of the street, but, like, on the side of the freeway.
- [20:51]
B
Worse. I would. Arguably worse.
- [20:54]
A
I'm fully undressed. Whatever. On the side. Ping. Get home again. My mom doesn't know that I drink at this time. This is, like, not something I'm, like, going to my childhood room. I throw up all over the front yard. Tommy, being the great friend that she is, finds the water hose, waters it down to, like, not make it clear that I had thrown up. And then the next morning, I had a flight back to DC Child early too, of course.
- [21:18]
B
Naturally.
- [21:18]
A
Oh, my God, my head was banging the whole flight. I tried to change the flight. They said no, or they said, you know, it wasn't gonna cost like, 500.
- [21:26]
B
Like, I'm not worth it.
- [21:28]
A
I just had the. The white paper bag in my mouth the whole time I was sitting in the middle seat, you know, whatever. Just the whole flight.
- [21:35]
B
Did you actually throw up?
- [21:36]
A
I didn't. I just had my eyes closed in the middle seat like that the whole time. I know the people next to me were pissed.
- [21:41]
B
You probably reeked of alcohol.
- [21:44]
A
No way. I don't think I took a shower.
- [21:45]
B
Oh, my. Oh, wow.
- [21:46]
A
I had to have taken a shower because I had to hug my mom.
- [21:48]
B
Goodbye and she didn't notice.
- [21:50]
A
And she would have noticed had I not taken a shower. So I must have taken a shower.
- [21:52]
B
Maybe you did. At night and you just don't remember.
- [21:54]
A
Maybe. Maybe Tommy. Tommy did say she cleaned me up. She undressed me and, like, clean me up. That's very sweet. And yeah, no, she's the best. Have you ever woken up with some ridiculous symptom like your eye is super swollen and itchy all of a sudden? Or your fingernails turning bright green? And then you Google it because, of course, and Google tells you you're about to die. You guys, we can't be Googling this type of stuff. Sometimes we need real professionals. And, you know, we can get them on zocdoc. Zocdoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment. Maybe I've been called in hypochondriac you know, every now and again. Is that wrong? Perhaps not. So I live on zocdoc. I am always at the doctor. I genuinely love it. Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to Zocdoc.com Paramore to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's z o c-o c.com paramore zocdoc.com paramore I'm Emily Fleming.
- [23:19]
B
I'm Jordan Morris. And I'm Matt Lieb. We are real comedy writers, real friends and real cheapskates. On every episode of our podcast, free with ads, we ask, why pay for expensive streaming services when you can get free movies from apps with weird names?
- [23:34]
A
Each week we review the freest movies the Internet has to offer. Classics like Pride and Prejudice, cult classics.
- [23:40]
B
Like Point Break and Holy sh. What did I just watch? Classic like Teen Witch tune in every.
- [23:47]
A
Week as we take a deep dive into the Internet's bargain bin.
- [23:50]
B
Every Tuesday on MaximumFun.org or your favorite.
- [23:53]
A
Pod place.
- [24:02]
B
The Flophouse is a podcast where we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it.
- [24:06]
A
Robert Shaw in Jaws and they're trying to figure out how to get rid of the ghoulies and he scratches his nails, goes, I'll get. Get your gullet.
- [24:11]
B
He's just standing above the toilet with a harpoon. No, I was just looking forward to.
- [24:15]
A
You going through the other ways in.
- [24:16]
B
Which Wild Wild west is historically inaccurate. You know how much movies cost nowadays when you add in your popped corn and your bagel bites and your cheese.
- [24:24]
A
Fritters, you can't go wrong with a Henry Cavill mustache. Here at Henry Cavill Mustaches, the only supplier, the flop house.
- [24:31]
B
New episodes every Saturday. Find it@maximumfun.org.
- [24:56]
A
Yeah, that's my, you know, crazy spring break story. That's my last spring break because I didn't do spring break until two weeks. You.
- [25:02]
B
Right, right. Which I, I mean, I'm glad that we surprised you cuz you, it was a good time with you. I think we had fun. It was really fun.
- [25:08]
A
And Jewel surprised me. I'm. I'm laying in my hotel room on, you know, what is essentially a work trip. And I, you know, when I go to sleep, I scroll my evening paper, which is essentially where my friends are.
- [25:18]
B
Located, which is crazy to me.
- [25:20]
A
Oh, I saw that Jewel was on top of me. She don't live in Florida, so I was really confused. And then she called me the next morning. She was like, yeah, I was waiting for Ryan to get here to surprise you. Like, we're both coming. And I was like, oh, my God. And I started crying. And it was fun.
- [25:31]
B
And we honestly got you. You don't drink much at all anymore.
- [25:34]
A
I don't drink anymore.
- [25:35]
B
And we got you that day.
- [25:37]
A
I'm drinking. Oh, it's a special day. My friends are here. It's gonna be so fun.
- [25:42]
B
This reminds me. So this isn't my spring break story, but it's a. When I was talking about going to Miami, it reminds me of, like, my stepdad telling about this story where he was meeting up with one of his friends. They were going to, like, going to Miami for something or whatever. And he got a buddy pass, which is like an airline ticket, basically. Like, you get, like, a standby ticket. And then this guy's girlfriend was also him. His friend was already in Miami. He was flying to meet his friend, and his friend's girlfriend was with him.
- [26:09]
A
Okay.
- [26:09]
B
So their first flight, they get from. He's from Nebraska. They get from Nebraska to, like, Houston. Because they had a connecting flight, was fine. But then they had, like, delayed on their connecting flight. They missed it, and they had to wait for the next flight to come in. They miss it, and then they're like, you are going to have to stay in a hotel. Like, sorry, but you have to come back tomorrow morning. So he's like, all right. He turns to the girl and she's like, I don't have any money. And so this girl is literally supposed to be meeting up with her boyfriend in Miami. And she's like, yeah, I don't have money. So my sister then has to get a room. And he had a girlfriend at this time and stay with her and had to stay with her. And then also, she, like, if they were eating, he's like, damn, I had to pay for her to eat.
- [26:44]
A
That's insane.
- [26:46]
B
They go back the next day. She like. They keep getting bumped. Keep getting bumped. King butt. They, like, left Friday. They're supposed to get there Friday night and then, like, hang out with him Saturday, leave Sunday morning, Saturday rolls through, they miss a bunch of flights. And then at this point, he's like, I'm just trying to get home.
- [26:58]
A
I'm going home.
- [26:59]
B
But then he couldn't leave because he couldn't leave that girl because she couldn't get home. She didn't have a charger. He said she was, like, a raggedy girl. Like, like. So he kept having to take her charger, and it was just like. And then he kept trying to call his friend. He was not picking up this Is insane. It was wild.
- [27:12]
A
He wasn't picking up. No, he knew. He left her with a rag.
- [27:14]
B
He was like, she's right behind your girl now.
- [27:16]
A
Right.
- [27:17]
B
So eventually, like, this girl and him like that. He's like, I'm just gonna get a ticket home. I don't know what I'm having that girl. He said, him stop being friends. He was like, hey, like, I paid X amount of dollars for your girl. He never paid him back. And they lost. Like, he was like. He's like, it's fine. It is what it is. But he was just like, that was a spring break horror story for him.
- [27:34]
A
That is a horror story.
- [27:36]
B
I guess I hear about these, like, NBA all star weekends where girls will. Or people. I don't want to say just girls will go out with no money. Like, they get flew out. And like, I'm gonna go here too. And I'm like, I don't think I would ever get on a plane without money.
- [27:47]
A
It's a safety hazard. I. Because you're at the beck and call. You're at the whims of whomever is paying for all your. If you have. Absolutely. And that person decides, I'm done with you. You're. You're homeless, and you can't get home.
- [28:02]
B
And I'm like, I am. I don't know if it's that I'm too practical. I would be terrified of that kind of lifestyle. Like, I'm like, I don't. I don't ever want to be that out of control.
- [28:10]
A
Yeah, that's not. That's not the life that me, personally, I could live.
- [28:13]
B
But, hey, I just don't think at this.
- [28:14]
A
I'm not a bad. Like, that.
- [28:16]
B
Meant to live. Com.
- [28:18]
A
At this age, I don't think I'm meant to live. Me and Parker. Me and Parker Posey. We straight like this. Because no, at this age, I'm not meant to live in a comfortable lifestyle. I totally get that. Now. Spring break songs. Are there any songs that scream spring break to you? I have two off the top of my head from two different eras that signify two different types of spring break. Okay, sure. So if you're thinking, no, come on, mama. Spring bling. Like, you know, oh, it's black people, you know? Okay, whatever. I'm thinking Rock the Boat by Aaliyah. Oh.
- [28:54]
B
Rocks. Our media is trying to get in this meeting.
- [28:58]
A
So that. That gives spring break to me a lot. And then like, oh, baby by Ashanti. Yeah. Rock with me. Yeah.
- [29:10]
B
Is it called rock?
- [29:11]
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's all baby, rock with me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, yes.
- [29:16]
B
You're right. Both of those feel very beachy. Very, like, summery.
- [29:20]
A
Beachy. Like, it's very, you know, like, whatever. That's one vibe for spring break.
- [29:25]
B
Same era, too.
- [29:25]
A
Yeah, yeah, same era. And then a different vibe for spring break. That also feels like spring break to me is. Hold on.
- [29:32]
B
I go. Okay. Why are you thinking of that one? Can I give you money?
- [29:34]
A
Yes. Go for it.
- [29:36]
B
I don't know why or. No, I do know why. I think this is clearly a spring break song. Thong Song.
- [29:40]
A
It screams, oh, my God.
- [29:43]
B
Top to bottom. Everything about it.
- [29:45]
A
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- [29:48]
B
And, you know, it's literally the same verse twice.
- [29:51]
A
I know.
- [29:52]
B
And he just keep changing it.
- [29:53]
A
You know, that's one of my favorite songs of all time. You know, I keep that List of Top 100 Favorite Songs of all times. Thong Song is absolutely. And it's on my karaoke list as well.
- [30:01]
B
Oh, it is.
- [30:01]
A
I'm gonna karaoke Thong Song every single time. And I love that song deeply. It's, like, wholeheartedly. It's camp.
- [30:07]
B
It is camp.
- [30:07]
A
That song is camp Cisco.
- [30:09]
B
And he is a campy character. He is, honestly, a drag queen. Yeah. I don't care what you think. Cisco is a Hello. But the passion behind baby.
- [30:22]
A
Wow. Wow.
- [30:23]
B
He is in it. And I'm like, everything. The music video is all. It screams Miami. It just.
- [30:27]
A
Wow. What a fun. That was a fantastic choice. Yeah.
- [30:31]
B
That screams.
- [30:31]
A
That is so spring.
- [30:32]
B
Very, very spring break.
- [30:33]
A
Okay, Now a different era of spring break. If you think in the whites, the pints.
- [30:39]
B
The whites, the whites, the Caucasian. Yeah.
- [30:42]
A
Yeah. Then it is. We are who we are. Kesha.
- [30:45]
B
Oh.
- [30:46]
A
Hot and dangerous. If you're one of us, then roll with us.
- [30:50]
B
Wow. Real.
- [30:50]
A
That absolutely screams spring break to me. And also similarly, blow. Kesha.
- [30:55]
B
Yeah. Feels. She is spring break. She is embodied.
- [31:02]
A
She created it incarnate.
- [31:04]
B
Yeah.
- [31:04]
A
100 spring break in human form is Kesha. It's a little. And this is old Kesha. I'm not talking about new Kesha, reformed Kesha, sober Kesha, old Kesha.
- [31:13]
B
Yeah.
- [31:14]
A
You know, she was a little grimy. Like, if you look. If you rubbed her, you would have a little bit of, you know, stuff that come off. Glitter certainly everywhere. You know, and, like, little clothes, tight 100 leather, sparkles, little clothing.
- [31:28]
B
And also, like, low budget.
- [31:31]
A
Yeah.
- [31:31]
B
There's, like.
- [31:32]
A
And also really good.
- [31:35]
B
Yeah.
- [31:35]
A
Like a riveting time. Yeah. And also low budget, poor.
- [31:39]
B
Right. Which there's something about spring break that Is inherently, like, the best spring breaks that I had were like, when you. I was literally just like, oh, we are just piecing together nickels and dimes to go. Just, like, get drunk and be waiting.
- [31:50]
A
Because you didn't have anything else to do. To be fair, my brother really did try to send me to spring break. Like, my brother was like, sis. I remember being in college, my brother being like, since you've never been to spring break.
- [32:00]
B
Yeah.
- [32:01]
A
And I was like, no. And, like, I didn't really have an interest in going. He offered to, like, pay and send me to spring break. And I'm like. Like, nobody's going. Like, you're. You're saying, yeah, you'll give me money, but, like, where am I gonna go to do what? I'm not about to play in the spring break, and nobody's doing it in your school.
- [32:14]
B
Like, I remember saying, everyone went home. Literally no one was like, oh, we're gonna go.
- [32:17]
A
I mean, I'm sure. I'm positive some other kids, sure. You know, at the school were like, oh, we're doing spring break. But it definitely was not, like, an organized. No, it was not. Like, most people were not doing spring break.
- [32:28]
B
I. I do. Okay. So those on the west coast watching, I'm curious. Where did you all go to spring break? Because I'm. I'm assuming East Coast. I don't know where they went either. Yeah, East Coast. Where the hell did you guys.
- [32:37]
A
Miami or they went to Florida. I don't know about Miami, but for sure.
- [32:40]
B
Probably PCB or Miami.
- [32:41]
A
Yeah, sure.
- [32:42]
B
But yeah, I am so curious where the west. Maybe you guys went to Mexico or. I mean, the people did go to Cancun.
- [32:47]
A
Now here we are. This is what we're actually. This. This actually makes so much sense because, you know, watching the hills, watching Laguna Beach. Yeah. Yeah, they did go to Cabo. They went to Cabo. I think it was Cowboy Cancun, but I think it was Cobble, because it was right by the east side. The west coast. Sure. Of Mexico. Yeah. They went to Cabo. So I do think that that was probably what people did. West coast kids, like the USC kids. Like, the USC kids probably went to Cabo.
- [33:12]
B
Okay.
- [33:12]
A
I would imagine they went to Mexico. Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah.
- [33:17]
B
Yeah. Because I'm always like. I don't. When we were down there, it was always kids from the south.
- [33:20]
A
That makes.
- [33:21]
B
I mean, so I never saw or not that I knew of anybody from the west Coast.
- [33:24]
A
Oh, I actually love Mexico. I'm going to Mexico in September. I Can't wait. I went to Mexico for New Year's a few years ago, and Lord, it was. Was amazing. And that's like the perfect weather for spring break. So I agree.
- [33:33]
B
You put me on the side.
- [33:35]
A
Is beautiful, right? I do love it. But. Yeah, that's my spring break music.
- [33:40]
B
I. I don't know now. Honorable mention. Welcome to Miami. I also, when I first went to Miami.
- [33:45]
A
What is that?
- [33:47]
B
Wilson? No. Party at the beach. Welcome to Miami. Do you not know this?
- [33:54]
A
I don't know that song.
- [33:55]
B
Are you serious?
- [33:56]
A
Yeah, I'm serious. I don't know that song. Summer song.
- [33:58]
B
I'm legitimately taken aback.
- [34:00]
A
I have. No, I don't. That is.
- [34:01]
B
I feel like Will Smith has, like, three songs.
- [34:03]
A
And I know summer, summer, summer time.
- [34:06]
B
That doesn't feel my spring break. Obviously it's summertime, but it does feel pool.
- [34:10]
A
That's all I know. Yeah, it's the same vibe. It feels like he made event music.
- [34:15]
B
Event.
- [34:16]
A
Yeah. Like, like, welcome to Miami Spring break song. Summer, summer, summer, summer, summertime. Like he made headstrong.
- [34:23]
B
What is that?
- [34:23]
A
That is that. Who is it? You thought.
- [34:25]
B
Oh, that's Will Smith.
- [34:27]
A
Are you okay?
- [34:28]
B
I am okay. Sorry. To be fair. Pause. Let's not act like that doesn't that.
- [34:34]
A
With his voice.
- [34:35]
B
It took me a minute to realize it was a local. J. They have similar energy. That song has a Will Smith energy. I don't think Cool J has any. You don't think so? Get your head strong. That's Will Smith.
- [34:45]
A
No.
- [34:45]
B
What is Will Smith Getting jiggy with it. You're right. They don't have the same energy.
- [34:50]
A
Not at all.
- [34:51]
B
Will Smith is kind of.
- [34:52]
A
That was kind of a little. A little.
- [34:54]
B
A little ghetto.
- [34:55]
A
You know what I mean? Headspun was a little hood.
- [34:58]
B
And Will Smith does not have that. No. Which is fine. No shade.
- [35:00]
A
Yeah. Not at all.
- [35:01]
B
But you know what that does make me think of? I've only done white spring breaks. I've never been a freaknik, obviously. I mean, I think freaknik was over by the time it was.
- [35:09]
A
Yeah.
- [35:09]
B
Old enough to go, I think.
- [35:11]
A
Yeah.
- [35:11]
B
I don't think that they were. And I do sometimes. I like, look at those. I'm like. That looked like it would have been a fun.
- [35:16]
A
A good, fun, raunchy time, right? Yeah. Yeah. Ah. I feel like. I feel. It feels like too much pressure.
- [35:23]
B
What do you mean?
- [35:24]
A
Freaking. You know what? I can't really dance like that. You know what I mean? I have rhythm. People always get this confused when I say I can't dance. People Be like, oh, you don't have rhythm. I absolutely have rhythm.
- [35:35]
B
Okay.
- [35:35]
A
I can, I can do, I can keep the rhythm. 100. Is my body loose enough to dance? No, I'm stiff.
- [35:42]
B
I don't think I understand. I feel like I will add, I've been around you. I don't think I've ever been like, oof, what are you doing? Yeah. So I agree that.
- [35:48]
A
Yeah, yeah.
- [35:49]
B
But I wonder what makes you think you can't dance. I also don't think you don't stand.
- [35:52]
A
Up the cuff it dance. Whenever I was doing that body roll into the sit portion. I can't do that. My body doesn't do it.
- [35:59]
B
Right, right, right.
- [36:00]
A
So that's what I mean by I can't dance. You know the looseness that you have to have in your hips in order to sway a certain way? I don't possess that in my spirit. I learned that I was stiff a couple. I've always known I was stiff, but I really saw it for the first time when I tried to ride a mechanical pool. Oh, for the first time six months.
- [36:18]
B
Ago, I saw this video. If you did this. Yeah.
- [36:20]
A
And I was with my friend who did it first and she was so sexy when she did it. I was like, wow. Like, wow, wow. I can't wait to get on this because I know. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? I'm like, yeah, okay. So I get on the bull and yeah, I was working and jerking on that.
- [36:37]
B
Yeah, you were the mechanical thing.
- [36:41]
A
Literally me. Right. I was real stiff. So that's how I learned that I was very stiff and I can't really dance that well.
- [36:47]
B
Interesting. Okay. I, I, I think, I don't know that I would say you can't dance. Well, I don't think like, you stand out either way.
- [36:53]
A
Yeah, no, you're like, yeah, you're doing, that's the whole thing. I'm, yeah, I'm just like here.
- [36:56]
B
Yeah.
- [36:57]
A
But I feel very self conscious. So it's like it always feels circumstances like freaknik or even like I don't even like, I don't like clubs. I don't like parties that don't have a purpose. You know what I mean?
- [37:14]
B
I do.
- [37:15]
A
Yeah. I don't like. Because then it just feels like the pressure to perform. That's what it is interesting. Like it's like performative fun to me because I'm actually feeling very self conscious. But I need to not look like I'm feeling very self conscious. So then I have to perform fun, which makes it not as fun as it would have been if I didn't have to perform. Fun.
- [37:32]
B
Part of me wonders if that self consciousness is the stiffness. It is all mental.
- [37:38]
A
No, no, it is. It's 100 mental because when I was drinking, I didn't have this at all. I didn't have this at all when I was drinking. And I'll watch back videos and I'll be like, oh, you was eating that too. It's not like I would be watching videos and be like, you thought she was eating. No, I thought I was exactly who the. I thought I was who I thought I was. Okay. But I can't find her when I'm sober, so yet she's. Yeah. Yes. I can't. I can't find her. So. But if you give me a couple drinks, I'm good, baby. Yeah, yeah.
- [38:04]
B
So whatever.
- [38:05]
A
I'm out. Yeah. But anyways, spring break stuff.
- [38:08]
B
I. Speaking of. So these are story. Lol. I'm like, I don't have wild spring break stories. And I'm gonna pull up a list of these are. Would you rathers that I want to put. Yes, these are things that have happened to me. They weren't always on a spring break, but it is a trip that I've had with friends.
- [38:21]
A
Okay.
- [38:22]
B
And so. Okay. Would you rather have 10 people stay in a two bedroom, one bath house that is 10 miles away from the party or be at a Motel 6 where someone might have died that is right on the beach?
- [38:38]
A
Motel 6. Right on the beach.
- [38:39]
B
Oh, really?
- [38:40]
A
I'm a convenience girl. Deeply.
- [38:42]
B
I'm. When I tell you that place was scary, like, I had never. Yeah, I had never walked into a space and been like, oh, oh, that one like legitimately scared me. It was like, like, it was like as soon as I walked in, I was like, oh, this is like the.
- [38:54]
A
Energy here is bad.
- [38:54]
B
Energy's bad. Things are dirty. Like the sheets were like the things are dirty.
- [38:58]
A
Yes. I've stayed in a Motel 6 before.
- [38:59]
B
Oh, that.
- [39:00]
A
I stayed in a Motel 6. I mean, it's the. I've only stayed in a Motel 6 once too, when my car broke down on the ride home from college at night.
- [39:07]
B
Oh, scary.
- [39:08]
A
And you know, I'm like halfway between San Francisco and la. That feels terrifying. And so, I mean, Tommy was with me luckily, but yeah. So I'm like three hours away from home. Probably a tow truck wouldn't have been able to come and tow my car home. So we just like had to figure it out. And I just had to stay at a Motel 6 overnight.
- [39:25]
B
Okay, so me and Tommy, but the 10 people in a room, because I mean, it was, it was 10 boys.
- [39:28]
A
So I would rather not. Yeah, I would rather not do that. 10 boys in a room and 10 miles away from the place. So you also have to like figure out how to get there. No, I would rather be at the scary Motel 6, right on the beach. Because, I mean, at the end of.
- [39:39]
B
The day, like I'm gonna sleep in there, man.
- [39:41]
A
You know, I'm gonna sleep in there and I'm gonna be on the beach and then I'm right here on the beach, like, woohoo. You know, I'm right here. At spring break, what can really happen right now at this. You know what? Right now, maybe other times, this is dangerous, but at spring break time, whatever, whatever. You know, leave the door open.
- [39:58]
B
Okay, sorry. Okay, okay, okay. Would you rather stay at the club until 7am or take a 20 minute soak in a strangely colored hot tub with eight other people?
- [40:10]
A
What club?
- [40:12]
B
Club.
- [40:13]
A
Club.
- [40:14]
B
Another club.
- [40:15]
A
Which is what we're gonna have to be doing if I'm out till 7am, so.
- [40:18]
B
And honestly, there was a time when I. It was just a trip to Spain and I. The clubs really do stay open like that and we. I remember walking out of the club with the sun coming up and it was kind of magical. You know what, it was cool.
- [40:28]
A
I've had, you know, some moments where I've stayed out till 7. It's only when I'm having like the time of my life. So like, yeah, if I'm out till seven, I'm having a blast, baby. So yeah, I'm down.
- [40:39]
B
I just know you're a girl who gets sleep now.
- [40:41]
A
You know, I'm a slee girl. I like to be horizontal by 10pm sharp.
- [40:46]
B
Would you rather make out with a dancer from a rundown strip club or take a mysterious pill from a lovely man that you manage?
- [40:54]
A
Your house dancer? Oh, I wouldn't take a pill worth a damn at all.
- [40:59]
B
Wow. I've been that girl before.
- [41:00]
A
Take a pill in a.
- [41:01]
B
It was Barcelona.
- [41:03]
A
I've told you this story.
- [41:04]
B
I've told you that story before.
- [41:05]
A
Yeah, yeah you have.
- [41:06]
B
It was fun.
- [41:06]
A
So yeah, you want to tell them the story?
- [41:07]
B
This is fair. So one time in Barcelona, we were staying at a hostel and I made friends with this guy and then like, he literally like turned to me, is like, I'm gonna take this pill. Do you want the other half? I'm with two friends who do not do drugs like that and they were like, what And I'm like, I'm gonna do it. And they literally took his number because they were gonna go home. Which in retrospect, this was so dangerous. I met this man today. He was nice. He was great. But we didn't know that.
- [41:29]
A
Right.
- [41:30]
B
And they were gonna go home. I was gonna stay out with this new person that had just met. And then I was like, yeah, I'll take this other half of this pill. My brain was not fully developed at that time.
- [41:38]
A
I knew you at this point, I believe. No.
- [41:40]
B
Oh, you did.
- [41:41]
A
I think. I think you were. You weren't 23. You. You were.
- [41:48]
B
I was 23.
- [41:49]
A
I was 27, maybe 28.
- [41:53]
B
How. Cuz this was like, I wasn't. It was when I went to. It was Spain and I was buzzfeed.
- [41:57]
A
Yeah.
- [41:58]
B
Damn. Maybe I was 27. Oh, no. I was too old. Old looking in my brain. I have really rewired this memory in my brain to be 23 years old. You came back and told me about.
- [42:09]
A
It, and I was like, what the.
- [42:10]
B
Yeah, that was wild. But it is very fun.
- [42:13]
A
I'm glad that ended up being a fun night. Like, that's. Those are the good stories in retrospect. Yeah. But you know, when it's happening, it's.
- [42:19]
B
Like, this is dangerous.
- [42:20]
A
I would be pissed off at you. Yeah. Oh. If I wasn't. Oh, my God.
- [42:23]
B
You wouldn't have let me take the pill.
- [42:25]
A
Probably. I would have tried not to let you take the pill. But you know, you. Right. So I don't know if I was gonna be. And then I just would have been pissed off at you. And then I would have been like, I'm not going nowhere, Ryan. Again.
- [42:32]
B
Oh, I can't travel.
- [42:34]
A
Yeah. I be like, I'm not going nowhere, Ryan.
- [42:36]
B
He don't know how to die. Yeah, you're. I'm not going to have you die on right now.
- [42:40]
A
Now they. Now the legal authority is looking for me because you done died on an international trip and I'm the one that went with you.
- [42:45]
B
Did not consider my brain that, like, if I would have gotten traded. Hurt now. But I'm just saying I could have been sex trafficked. I don't know. You made it sound like getting traded.
- [42:54]
A
Like a baseball card or slave. I would have got that too.
- [42:59]
B
You're right. And I guess I didn't consider what my friends would have had to do. They wake up the next morning, and to be fair, this was the same night that I was out till seven.
- [43:06]
A
Yeah.
- [43:06]
B
And they also woke up and I was not home. Because, like, I was walking home. So scary all around for them. I'm sorry? The McGees. They're married now. Oh, I know. Last one. Would you. And this one is something that did not happen to me, but I'm just curious as what you would do.
- [43:19]
A
Okay.
- [43:20]
B
Win a 500 wet t shirt contest. But the video goes viral.
- [43:23]
A
$500.
- [43:24]
B
$500 for wet t shirt concert. The video goes viral.
- [43:26]
A
Okay.
- [43:27]
B
Or you get a free stay at on a yacht for the weekend after drunkenly befriending a Russian billionaire and getting matching Bulbasaur tattoos. Both of these things have repercussions for forever.
- [43:41]
A
If my wet T shirt video, if I won the $500, it means them things was sitting how they needed to.
- [43:49]
B
Okay.
- [43:50]
A
So, yeah, on the Internet that I feel like nipples are so kind of like an accessory now that, like, if I really had titties that I was like, yeah, those are mine, baby. I wouldn't feel really anyway, if my titties, especially a wet T shirt contest, like, it's kind of tasteful, even. You know what I mean? It's kind of right? It's kind of like. Yeah, like, let them. Oh, these I didn't flash. I'm not doing Girls on Wild. It's just very much.
- [44:17]
B
All right, update. You get, you get.
- [44:20]
A
You get hit up by Joe Francis.
- [44:25]
B
Do it.
- [44:26]
A
A tattoo. I'm tattooing.
- [44:29]
B
Oh, media greedy said yes.
- [44:31]
A
Tattoo. I would get a meaty tattoo, baby.
- [44:34]
B
Yeah, you would. I don't know. I don't think I would do Girls Gone Wild or really sitting with this.
- [44:39]
A
What if you had to, like, pull out your dick and that was what, like, the guys going out, like, you had to, like, flash a p. Flash your pen right quick. Yeah.
- [44:47]
B
Something about Guys Gone Wild feels less public than, like, a viral moment. I feel like that's still, like, DVD trade. That feels, like, still, like, hidden. Does that make sense or am I not.
- [44:58]
A
I'm not sure if I'm following.
- [44:59]
B
I feel like something that has gone viral, like, everyone has seen it, I think porn or not.
- [45:03]
A
Oh, understood. Understood.
- [45:04]
B
It feels a little more like you have to be seeking.
- [45:06]
A
Understood. Like, it'd be weird if you saw it. So, like.
- [45:08]
B
Yeah. How the did you get there?
- [45:09]
A
Yeah.
- [45:10]
B
It's mutual destruction.
- [45:11]
A
Yeah. You haven't seen it.
- [45:12]
B
It's like, oh, well, what are you doing?
- [45:15]
A
Looking for guys going while. Exactly. Looking for college boys showing their dick.
- [45:19]
B
Exactly. So you would never.
- [45:22]
A
Yeah.
- [45:23]
B
Although I almost got a Pokemon tattoo just for fun. My first tattoo idea was a Pokeball. I'm glad I did not go through with it.
- [45:28]
A
I would just choose the placement of my tattoo, and it would be, like, under my bottom lip so that it, you know, those wipe off and, like, you know, nobody sees it. Or I put on the bottom of my foot. That's another thing that I've seen people do with tattoos on the bottom of their foot.
- [45:44]
B
Ways around this.
- [45:45]
A
Yeah, sure, whatever. But, yeah, the r. Billionaire on the yacht. That's a good connection to have.
- [45:50]
B
I agree. And now we're bonded for life.
- [45:53]
A
100. You know, it sounds dangerous. Like, you. Like, you know he could kill you, right? Russian billionaire.
- [45:59]
B
I. Wow. Yeah, it does. It. It's.
- [46:03]
A
It's.
- [46:03]
B
Yeah. Yeah, I agree. It sounds like. I don't. The less I know about you, the better.
- [46:06]
A
100.
- [46:07]
B
Keep it light, very surface level.
- [46:08]
A
Sounds like dragon from Kim Possible. Like a villain's lair. Like, you just entered the villain.
- [46:13]
B
Sorry, I have not heard that name.
- [46:15]
A
Dren. Yes.
- [46:16]
B
Yes.
- [46:16]
A
Dren. Yes.
- [46:17]
B
He was the blue.
- [46:18]
A
Why was that his name? Yeah.
- [46:19]
B
I don't know.
- [46:20]
A
Was he ashy, too, like the girl sisters? And why did.
- [46:23]
B
When the girl sisters get clean, when the pretty one got. Or the one got pretty, why didn't put no lotion on that girl?
- [46:27]
A
She was still blue.
- [46:28]
B
Yes. And I'm like, so y' all did this girl's hair, gave her an outfit. Y' all didn't put lotion makeup on her.
- [46:33]
A
You put blue. You put ash makeup on her.
- [46:35]
B
Oh, wow.
- [46:36]
A
That was. That was pretty crazy.
- [46:38]
B
Yeah. Then no one. No one thought give her some lotion, Right?
- [46:40]
A
Did you answer for the woman? Would you rather you just get Dave? Did you say, well, to be fair, you did them.
- [46:44]
B
I did them.
- [46:45]
A
Yeah.
- [46:45]
B
Except for that last one.
- [46:46]
A
I'm gonna say, wait, you got a tattoo with somebody?
- [46:48]
B
No, that.
- [46:49]
A
That was the last thing.
- [46:49]
B
That was one that I did.
- [46:50]
A
You win a wet T shirt contest?
- [46:52]
B
I have, like, been on stage doing a minia, but no, but most. I think, like, the fun thing about, like, I usually will go places with girls, and so, like, they'll let me kind of, like, play around, but I'm never gonna win a wet T shirt contest. Even though there are times where I've been, like, in, like, twerking contests or things like that. I am doing better.
- [47:08]
A
Whoa.
- [47:09]
B
Naturally doing better. Like, I know I'm doing better, but, like, like, you know.
- [47:12]
A
Yeah, of course.
- [47:13]
B
Sometimes I look back at those spring break days, and I'm like, they used to call me Devonte, which at the time I thought was funny. And look, I know my drunk ultra Ego in quotations was devonte. And I'm like, look. Yeah. Sometimes I look back and I go insane. Insane.
- [47:27]
A
They also made you sound gay.
- [47:30]
B
What do you mean?
- [47:33]
A
Devonte sounds like a gay.
- [47:34]
B
A game you.
- [47:35]
A
Oh, you're saying they also were. They also were.
- [47:37]
B
They were clocking me this before I.
- [47:38]
A
Was out as well. Before you were out.
- [47:40]
B
Wow.
- [47:41]
A
Not only is he be excessively.
- [47:44]
B
Because you could have been Tyrone.
- [47:45]
A
You know what I mean? You could have been a bunch. But devonte is a hairdresser. That's a black gay male hairdresser.
- [47:52]
B
You know what's funny?
- [47:53]
A
What?
- [47:53]
B
In my fraternity, I also won most likely to move to Hollywood. They were right. But then as I accept this award, one of the guys and I mean, I think I was out at the time. I was a senior. He goes, yeah, hairdresser to the styles stars. And I was like, also, that's rude.
- [48:07]
A
It is. Hairdresser. Right. Hairdresser.
- [48:10]
B
And I would never.
- [48:11]
A
Somebody do my.
- [48:13]
B
Someone does my hair.
- [48:15]
A
All three of them.
- [48:15]
B
But yeah. So you called me. That's what they were.
- [48:17]
A
He.
- [48:18]
B
This is trauma that I process.
- [48:20]
A
They were calling you. Yeah, they were.
- [48:21]
B
They were.
- [48:21]
A
Yeah. They were clocking you. But you didn't even know. Didn't you thought it was just racism, baby. It did.
- [48:26]
B
Good old fashioned.
- [48:27]
A
Good old fashioned racism. And whatever happened to good old fashioned racism? Whatever. When started getting. Anyways, I think that's really it. You got anything else you want to talk about? Spring break related?
- [48:40]
B
I. I think spring breaks are fun. I do think more people should go on them. I think go make those mistakes. I do hate that it's the social media of it all right now. But it.
- [48:48]
A
Yeah.
- [48:49]
B
I think if you can get away and just like go with friends and make some silly mistakes.
- [48:54]
A
Silly. Not life. Wear a condom.
- [48:57]
B
Oh, my God. Always.
- [48:58]
A
And be safe at all times. Don't black out. Don't do nothing.
- [49:01]
B
You know, and like we have technology now. Have people's locations.
- [49:04]
A
Just have people's locations. Right.
- [49:06]
B
We'll find you.
- [49:06]
A
Check it when you laying down like the evening paper.
- [49:09]
B
Yeah.
- [49:10]
A
Yeah.
- [49:10]
B
Spring break can be fun. I think that lots of life memories have been made. Yeah, I do. I really do. Look back, I'm like, this was a fun time.
- [49:17]
A
I wish. I do kind of wish that I had more of a spring break culture. I just didn't have any of that. Yeah. I also wish I studied abroad. I didn't do that either, so.
- [49:24]
B
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's fine.
- [49:26]
A
You didn't make the most of college.
- [49:29]
B
No.
- [49:29]
A
To Be fair, I didn't go to a college that offered the most.
- [49:33]
B
They didn't offer study abroad.
- [49:34]
A
Surely they did, but again, most people did not to do it.
- [49:37]
B
Yeah, I do feel like stuff like that does not put. It's very American, I imagine. Be like, stay here. Why would you go?
- [49:44]
A
Right?
- [49:44]
B
I'm like. But I'm like, yeah, go. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [49:47]
A
Anyways, that's all. Thank you for listening once again. You can find Mocha Grande shirts down in the description box below. If you would like to hear more from me, you can listen to me every Single day on SiriusXM on channel 109, the STARS channel, as well as Unwell on air channel. The show is called the Daily Dirty. You can find me my co host Fiona and Hannah. And yeah, it's live. It's not a podcast that has been confusing people. It's not a podcast. It is a live show every day. Yeah. And that's it. If you want to email me, you can email me at Black people love paramore gmail.com youm can find me across social media platforms at bblppod or me personally at sequoiabhomes.
- [50:25]
B
Yeah, you can find me on socials @goodguyri. That is good with a U G U D. And then if you're in the LA area, I am a part of an improv group called A Tribe Called Melanin and we have a Show on the 21st.
- [50:36]
A
First.
- [50:37]
B
So tickets are available now.
- [50:38]
A
Come out. Oh, you have to show the day after Coachella.
- [50:41]
B
I know, girl.
- [50:41]
A
What is it? The day that we do that?
- [50:43]
B
It's at night. But even so, I know it's gonna be rough. Coachella is gonna feel a little bit spring breaky. So you gotta get.
- [50:48]
A
It's my first Coachella too, so.
- [50:51]
B
Oh, okay.
- [50:52]
A
I've bought tickets for Coachella three times and this is the first one that I'm actually attending, so. Yes.
- [50:57]
B
And this is the second time you've bought it for Gaga. Well, inadvertently bought it for Gaga.
- [51:00]
A
Yes.
- [51:00]
B
But. But this, this is your third time seeing Gaga life.
- [51:04]
A
Second. I'm really excited. It's going to be fun.
- [51:07]
B
It is going to be fun.
- [51:08]
A
We'll report back.
- [51:09]
B
Yeah, we'll report back on our Coachella adventures. Our. Our second spring break together now. Yeah.
- [51:13]
A
In less than a year. Okay, bye. Bye. Bye.