Episode 553 - Ryan Darby || It’s Okay To Talk.

Summary

Blood Origins Podcast - Episode 553: Ryan Darby || It’s Okay To Talk

Release Date: April 17, 2025
Host/Author: Blood Origins Inc.

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Introduction

In Episode 553 of the Blood Origins podcast titled "It’s Okay To Talk," host Mike Axelrod engages in a heartfelt conversation with Ryan Darby. The episode delves into Ryan's personal journey with mental health challenges and explores the pivotal role hunting and outdoor activities play in his life and well-being. This episode not only sheds light on the often-overlooked intersection between mental health and hunting but also emphasizes the importance of breaking stigmas and fostering supportive communities.

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Guest Introduction: Ryan Darby

Ryan Darby serves as a Regional Officer for the British Association for Shooting Conservation (BASC) in the UK. His role encompasses overseeing regions from the Humber Estuary to the outskirts of London, where he visits game shoots, wildfowling clubs, and organizes regional events to unite the shooting community. Ryan's dedication extends beyond his professional responsibilities; he actively participates in conservation efforts and advocates for the positive impacts of hunting.

Ryan Darby: "It brings awareness to non-hunters that it's more than just killing animals." [02:57]

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Ryan’s Personal Story: Navigating Mental Health

Ryan’s journey with mental health began at the age of 15 when he was involved in a distressing rescue operation as part of the Royal National Lifeboat Institution (RNLI), a voluntary service he was introduced to through his family. The incident, which unfortunately resulted in a fatality, left a profound impact on him.

Several years later, at 21, Ryan faced another traumatic event—a second rescue mission that exacerbated his mental health struggles, leading to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and depression. This period was further complicated by the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic, pushing him deeper into a depressive spiral.

Ryan Darby: "I decided to record a video from my hunting stand... and opened my heart out a bit like I am now." [25:08]

Seeking help, Ryan reached out to his General Practitioner (GP) and began taking antidepressants. This decision triggered scrutiny from the firearms department, as medication use can sometimes influence gun ownership policies. Contrary to his expectations, Ryan was met with understanding and support, allowing him to retain his firearms—tools that provided him solace and a sense of safety amidst his mental health struggles.

Ryan Darby: "Once you've asked for help, everything becomes so much easier." [36:29]

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The Role of Hunting: A Therapeutic Escape

For Ryan, hunting is more than a recreational activity; it serves as a therapeutic escape that soothes his soul and quiets inner demons. The tranquility of the outdoors, coupled with the responsibilities of hunting, provides him with the mental clarity and peace he seeks.

Ryan Darby: "My escape was to be out in the woods with a dog carrying a gun and that was where my happy place was." [22:28]

Hunting, in Ryan’s experience, offers a structured environment where he can engage in a meaningful activity that aligns with his values of conservation and responsible wildlife management. This connection between hunting and mental well-being underscores the multifaceted benefits that outdoor activities can provide.

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Mental Health in the Hunting Community: Breaking the Stigma

The conversation highlights the pervasive stigma surrounding mental health within the hunting and broader outdoor communities. Ryan emphasizes the outdated notion that men should suppress their emotions and not seek help, a stereotype that significantly hinders individuals from addressing their mental health needs.

Ryan Darby: "The stigma that men aren't supposed to get help nowadays is utter rubbish." [01:03]

Initiatives like Mental Hunts in New Zealand and the collaborative efforts between Blood Origins and the Gamekeepers Welfare Trust (GWT) aim to create safe spaces for hunters to discuss their mental health openly. Ryan shares his personal experience of publicly sharing his struggles through social media and articles, which not only provided him relief but also inspired others to seek help.

Ryan Darby: "We just need to look out for each other at the same time." [37:18]

By fostering a culture of openness and support, Blood Origins seeks to dismantle the barriers that prevent individuals from addressing their mental health issues, ultimately promoting a healthier and more resilient community.

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Blood Origins' Initiatives: Advocating for Mental Health and Conservation

Blood Origins is at the forefront of merging storytelling with conservation efforts to reshape perceptions of hunting. The organization actively collaborates with partners like BASC and GWT to implement programs that support mental health within the hunting community.

One of the key initiatives discussed includes hosting events where members can receive health checks and engage in conversations about their well-being. These events are designed to provide both physical and mental health support, ensuring that individuals have access to the resources they need.

Ryan Darby: "We're trying our hardest where we can to try and change that in all sorts of different ways." [33:22]

Additionally, Blood Origins leverages media platforms, such as magazines reaching 150,000 individuals, to share personal stories and advocate for mental health awareness. Ryan's own contributions to the Shooting and Conservation magazine serve as a testament to the organization's commitment to these causes.

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Conclusion: Embracing Vulnerability and Building Supportive Communities

Episode 553 of the Blood Origins podcast serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of vulnerability and seeking help. Ryan Darby's narrative not only highlights the therapeutic benefits of hunting and outdoor activities but also calls for a collective effort to eradicate the stigma surrounding mental health in the hunting community.

Ryan Darby: "Don't hesitate to ask for help. Don't hesitate to reach out to anybody that you feel like you can talk to and talk to them." [37:18]

By sharing his story, Ryan embodies the mission of Blood Origins—to change perceptions, support conservation, and foster a community where individuals feel empowered to discuss their mental health openly. This episode encourages listeners to embrace their struggles, seek support, and contribute to a more understanding and compassionate society.

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Key Takeaways

• Hunting as Therapy: For Ryan Darby, hunting provides a vital outlet for managing mental health challenges, offering a sense of peace and purpose.

• Breaking Stigmas: The episode emphasizes the need to dismantle the stigma associated with mental health, especially within the hunting community, to encourage individuals to seek help.

• Community Support: Initiatives by Blood Origins and partnerships with organizations like BASC and GWT play a crucial role in providing support and resources to those in need.

• Power of Vulnerability: Sharing personal struggles can have a profound impact, both for the individual and for others who may be experiencing similar challenges.

• Conservation and Well-Being: Responsible hunting and conservation efforts are intertwined with the mental well-being of individuals involved, highlighting the broader benefits of outdoor activities.

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Notable Quotes:

• “The stigma that men aren't supposed to get help nowadays is utter rubbish.” – Ryan Darby [01:03]

• “Once you've asked for help, everything becomes so much easier.” – Ryan Darby [36:29]

• “We just need to look out for each other at the same time.” – Ryan Darby [37:18]

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For those interested in learning more about Ryan Darby's work or seeking support, connecting with Blood Origins Inc. can provide valuable resources and a supportive community.

Transcript

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[Mike Axelrod]

Today the podcast that I have recorded and you're about to listen to is with Ryan Darby. You don't know him from a bar of soap, nor should you, but we have this podcast recorded specifically because Ryan had some mental health issues, still deals with some and how it relates to hunting. Obviously to him, being outdoors is his happy place. It's what soothes his soul, quiets the demons. But this is more of a story around, like saying something, being willing to open up and say, hey, I'm not okay. And it did open up a little bit of a sore spot I guess with me and things that I went through as a kid. I don't get into details, but towards the end of the podcast you'll hear some of the things that I even dealt with that I had to. I had to talk about. I had to talk about it with people that I trusted and it was the best thing I've ever done. So if you're out there, if you're thinking about things that shouldn't be thinking about, I think the best thing you can do is reach out to someone and just say, hey, I'm not okay. Hey, I need to talk and get help. The stigma that men aren't supposed to get help nowadays is utter rubbish. So enjoy the episode and if it so moves you, reach out to Ryan, reach out to us. And thanks. So there's a reason why I started Blood Origins. And that reason is simple, that I wanted to convey the truth about hunting.

[Ryan Darby]

It brings awareness to non hunters that it's more than just killing animals.

[Mike Axelrod]

How do I start it?

[Ryan Darby]

Brittany My name.

[Mike Axelrod]

Does my hair look okay? My Name is Mike Axelrod. Start again. Yeah, I hated it, too. Braxton, you said something in the car to me. You said that you were living on borrowed time. There's a perception around who hunters are, what we're supposed to be. And a feminist that works for a nonprofit that is a hunter that has only eaten wild game for the last 20 years is likely not the thing that people think about when it comes to a hunter. So, as we probably both know, this world is all about who you know and who knows other people and other people saying, I want you to talk to this person. I want you to talk to this person. I want you to connect to this person. And from a blood origins perspective, I don't think I've ever said no to somebody in terms of, like, connecting with us. I've regretted a couple. Not that I'm going to regret this one. I'm not setting up the scene for you, Ryan. And when I talk to Manny, Manny, and Manny is short for Manish, I said his name really properly on his podcast. Kelahabi, I think is his last name. And I met him in person in Atlanta. He came to dsc, and unfortunately, when he did his podcast with me, he didn't do his mustache. He was just like this really crazy Indian guy who lives in the uk and he says, hey, you need to talk to this guy called Ryan Darby. I said, okay, why do I need to talk to Rondo? Yeah, he works for Basque, but he also has, you know, really good insights and stories to mental health and hunting and whatnot. Sounds like. Well, just seems to be quite a pervasive topic all around the world when it comes to what hunting and outdoors is doing for people and their mental acuity or their mental health or just getting back. Right. Some sort of fashion. But you know Manny pretty well.

[Ryan Darby]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So Manny comes and does some shows with us through the show season. So a bit smaller than. Than dsc, but we do some here in the uk.

[Mike Axelrod]

He works for Basque for you guys in those shows.

[Ryan Darby]

So he comes along as a volunteer and helps us out. And Manny has some pretty big shotguns that he likes to bring along. Four balls and stuff like that to. To show and tell people.

[Mike Axelrod]

Oh, I saw that shotgun the other day. It was like somebody. It was like two and a half meters long or something. No, that's long. That's too long. Was one and a half meters.

[Ryan Darby]

Compared to Manning. It looks bigger.

[Mike Axelrod]

Just for everyone's edification, Manny is about, gosh, I don't want to. He's going to Be so pissed at me saying this, like five foot something. Five foot two, five foot three.

[Ryan Darby]

There's probably and a half in there. That's probably very important. And a half.

[Mike Axelrod]

That's right, and a half. But yeah, he's got this huge four ball that, you know, people obviously with these driven, driven shoots. These pheasants come over and I've seen videos of, you know, the gun is, gosh, I know a meter and a half is too much, but I don't know, it's 50, 60 inches maybe.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, you're probably talking about a, a 36 inch barrel, if not longer. Yeah.

[Mike Axelrod]

My gosh. My gosh. Well, Ryan Darby, welcome to the Blood Origins podcast. Introduce yourself who you are, who do you work for?

[Ryan Darby]

So my name is Ryan Darby. I'm a regional officer for BASC in the uk. So we're the British association for Shooting Conservation. So we're the largest organization in the UK that represents sport shooting in the uk.

[Mike Axelrod]

And what does a regional officer do?

[Ryan Darby]

So in the uk, I cover from the Humber estuary to the edge of London and cover most of the east of England. So I go out and visit game shoots, I visit wildfowling clubs and run regional events so that the shooting community can come together, talk about any issues that are going on in shooting and talk about the positive things that are also going on.

[Mike Axelrod]

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[Ryan Darby]

That one is. No, actually this one is a Katie Hargreaves. Katie Hargreaves, that is. Yeah, that's a Katie Hargreaves with the British six deer on. And then the other one is a couple a friend of mine does portrait. So I've got my old Labrador on the wall there.

[Mike Axelrod]

You know, again, this world is so, so, so small. You know that Katie Hargreaves was in my booth in Atlanta.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike Axelrod]

So yeah, Katie's amazing. Is that a print or did you buy the original?

[Ryan Darby]

I bought that. That's a print from the British Game Fair.

[Mike Axelrod]

Yeah, she's really, really good. Yeah, we're quite excited about Katie and obviously she's growing and meeting new people and having great clients and whatnot. So when you go to these shoots, Ryan is, are you just. It's just business development essentially from a bass perspective and just hearing from people on the land saying hey, we're starting to hear this or hey, we're starting to hear that.

[Ryan Darby]

Yes. Yeah. So I go in and we'll talk about how we can improve their shoot. So whether that's moving cover crops, putting in more feed down or something like that. Winter bird feed to food feed through the hunger gap. So there's no natural food around to try and coverage the pheasants and other species in to hold them in that area. We also look at finances, that kind of thing. Stocking densities the size of pens. So in the UK we put birds into a pen, we keep them in there for a couple of weeks until they learn that that wood is home and then we release them out into there completely wild. Yeah, release them probably four, five months before actually going to shoot them. So give them essentially.

[Mike Axelrod]

Although those situations, all the birds are on the landscape and do they supplement through the, through the year or is it just like a one time, everyone's in the field?

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, we prefer a one time release so we don't top up as such. So just the ones.

[Mike Axelrod]

Wow, that's so cool. I don't, I've never done it. I've never done any hunting in the uk. One day, one day soon, I hope.

[Ryan Darby]

One day get money. Cool.

[Mike Axelrod]

Ah, for sure. So one of the reasons we got put together is and as I mentioned it earlier, mental health. You know, I've talked to somebody from New Zealand. So there's a brand new company, dare I say company, probably a non profit, called Mental Hunts in New Zealand. And they were started specifically because New Zealand gun laws have changed tremendously in the last three to four years. And you have people coming back from obviously military service and all the rest of it with PTSD and anxiety and whatnot. And now these guys are getting worried that mental health is being looked at as something. How do I say this? They're worried that if they step up and admit that they've got mental problems and not, you know, psychotic problems. But hey, I'm dealing with anxiety, I'm Dealing with ptsd. I'm dealing with thoughts of suicide in New Zealand. If you check that box in your firearms application, there has been situations where the cops have come immediately to your house, shown up, raided you like a criminal and taken everything away from you. And this guy was like, isn't that just the absolute wrong thing to be doing for somebody who's saying, hey, I'm admitting versus I'm not going to check the box now. Now people are saying, I'm not checking the box.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah. So very similar in the uk, similar stories again, people going to their gp, so their doctor saying they've got these issues, they want some help with it, and that then become the marker that goes to the firearms department that will then come out and, yeah, in some cases seize guns from people due to the medication that they'll be taking.

[Mike Axelrod]

So you're seeing that happen with your. Your members?

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, we're seeing it in the UK in some instances, yes.

[Mike Axelrod]

So is, again, I. I don't get much from Manny. Do you have a mental. Do you have a story tied to that yourself, Ryan?

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah. So outside of. Of the shooting community, I'm a part of the rlli, which is the Royal National Lifeboat Institution in the uk. So that's a voluntary service at which I go to sea on a small boat and we go out to anybody in any form of danger, so be it a vessel that needs towing in if it's got engine problems. So a lot like the US Coast Guard, that kind of thing. And then also we go out to people drowning and anything like that, so we cover right on the coastline. So my story, 15 years old, I was involved in a rescue of somebody who had drowned. I was best person on scene. He was on the beach, so the boat couldn't actually get to them. So I was there on foot and performed CPR on this person for probably close to 10 minutes before we had some paramedic sort of come.

[Mike Axelrod]

And you were already involved in this society or this organization at that age?

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, so my father and grandfather were both coxswains of the rnli, so I grew up within the station as such as a small child and. And got involved where I could. As I slowly grew up and was given more and more that I was allowed to do. And then having done first aid courses and things like that at my age at the time, I then felt that, yeah, I could definitely get involved and help where I could.

[Mike Axelrod]

And it was completely. It's all completely voluntary.

[Ryan Darby]

Completely voluntary. There's. There's no money that exchanges anywhere, so.

[Mike Axelrod]

That individual on that beat you saved his or her life or couldn't.

[Ryan Darby]

We didn't. We. We had a, a negative outcome on that day and it wasn't until the next day. Bearing in mind I was 15 at the time, I was still at school. I went back to school and realized it was a. The parent of some of the students that I went to school with.

[Mike Axelrod]

And they re. They knew it at the time or only you knew it.

[Ryan Darby]

So they didn't know that I was involved at that point. So I. Obviously they were grieving and it was going around school that this had happened, but nobody at school knew that I was also involved in. In a different way.

[Mike Axelrod]

And do we know what happened? Like why what happened?

[Ryan Darby]

Like this dark story of he was a kite surfer. So I don't know if you're familiar with kite surfing. Yeah, large kite and a small board and they. They, yeah, use the wind to drag themselves around and his safety device didn't deploy. When he tried to put it on his chest to release the kite, the kite dragged him under and subsequently drowned.

[Mike Axelrod]

Geez.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, so I had that the age of 15 and that affected me quite, quite heavily at that age.

[Mike Axelrod]

Were you a hunter then, Ryan? Was your family hunting?

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, yeah. So both of my grandfathers on both sides were. Were heavily into. Into hunting and shooting. One of them working dogs and, and running the small game shoots and. And the other one being a. A paying gun to go onto game shoots as well. So I saw it from both sides of the running and the, the standing on the peg and actually shooting. So yeah, had a great interest in it from that age. And then yeah, left school, became a gamekeeper, looked after quite a large estate in the uk sort of as a under keeper, as an apprentice. So learned the trade through that and then going. Moving on a few years. We then had a second incident in which a chap had jumped off a cliff. So we went to. To help it that individual. And we also had another negative impact I think with that first or with the second one that had brought back feelings I didn't realize I had on the first. So post traumatic stress disorder, ptsd which then sent me tumbling into depression and that kind of thing. This is just before COVID as well. So just before we all got locked down. I was in a bit of a spiral at that stage. Went to my GP and obviously ended up on antidepressants and stuff like that. With that I then really.

[Mike Axelrod]

Those are the only two things. Right. You. You obviously this, this incident at 15 years old, obviously we all have, you know, we're a different generation. That there was no talk of psychologists or talking about your feelings or any of that kind of stuff. That just wasn't stuff he did.

[Ryan Darby]

No, no. So it. Yeah, especially, I'm sure here in the uk as well as everywhere else. It's always. There's always been that man up and get on with it and we don't talk about feelings, we. We bottle them up and carry on. And I think, right, that was slightly what had happened with that is bottled it up and forgotten about it until.

[Mike Axelrod]

And how long. What was the time frame between when you have the first and the second one?

[Ryan Darby]

We're probably talking about six years, something like that. So, yeah, probably at the age of 21, something like that, the second one that then hit me and then that, yeah, I then went to the doctors with that one and, and sought help.

[Mike Axelrod]

So did. Was it just you at that point? Did you say, man, I need to do something, or your family around you.

[Ryan Darby]

Was like, hey, it was my family, it was the rnli. So they, they had people that came and took me through a trim process, which is taken. Taking me, talking to me, do I need help? Do I. What can we do to help? So saw therapists or doctors or specialists, yeah, looking at different things. I was struggling to sleep at the time and that sort of thing. So that put me onto some quite heavy sort of medication to try and, yeah, get me to sleep and get my mind to rest. And so obviously subsequently from that, it was then the firearms department were then contacting me saying, we're aware that you're taking this medication. What's going on? Can you let me know what you need?

[Mike Axelrod]

How was that first call? Did that make you incredibly anxious? I could imagine any call from.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Axelrod]

When you answer saying, like, hey, buddy.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, let's talk about guns for a second and medication. And so I explained to them that my, my escape was to be out in the woods with a dog carrying a gun and that that was where my, my happy place was, where I felt like I could breathe and, and exercise and, and, yeah, be outside in the fresh air. And yeah, that's where I, I felt I, I could be. And I explained that if I didn't have my guns, then that would remove that opportunity for me to have somewhere where I felt safe. So they, they had several conversations with myself and with my, my gp, my doctor, and they both agreed that they would monitor me, but I would be allowed to remain in hold of my shotguns and my firearms.

[Mike Axelrod]

Now would have the police service normally just come in and take everything.

[Ryan Darby]

In some cases they would have.

[Mike Axelrod]

It sounds, it sounds as, it almost sounds anomalous that they decided, hey, let me, let's have a conversation with this guy.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah. So at the time I, I was still working in the shooting industry, so I was still a gamekeeper, which meant that like a mechanic using spanners every day. I was carrying it right from the shotgun every day. So if you, you took away my firearms, then you take away a tool in my toolkit, that could affect my job role at that stage. So. And then in the uk, when you work on a, on a large estate, you tend to get a house provided to you as part of that job. So that meant if I lost my guns, I could lose my job, which means I could have lost where I was living at the time as well. So it's, it was quite a big impactual conversation to have with them to say, look, I need those more than you probably think I do did.

[Mike Axelrod]

Was this a over the phone kind of conversation or they come to the house and at the GP's office or.

[Ryan Darby]

This one was a phone call, then we had a face to face, a coffee and a biscuit together. And then from there it was mainly then just over the phone, but they did come out and meet me and we did have heart to heart conversations about exactly how we were going to deal with it.

[Mike Axelrod]

I'm intrigued. Was it the same guy constantly? Like you got assigned this one cop, this is your guy and you developed almost like a relationship with him or her?

[Ryan Darby]

Yes. So we have what we call SEO in the uk, so firearms inquiry officers and they are dedicated within a county. They have their own number of firearms license and holders that they're responsible for. So could be 2,3000 that they're responsible for. But he was mine, so he, he was the one that knew my story the whole time. It wasn't this cop, that cop or anything like that. It was always the same person that I was in contact with.

[Mike Axelrod]

I can imagine that makes things a lot easier.

[Ryan Darby]

It definitely does. Yeah. When, like when they know, talking to.

[Mike Axelrod]

Someone and understanding your history and understanding everything that you know, your job and seeing where you live and understanding the rural climate, it's almost like. Because obviously he lives in the same region as you, right?

[Ryan Darby]

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

[Mike Axelrod]

Oh, man.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah. So it was that. And then during that time when I was in that sort of spiral of depression, one of my grandfathers passed away. So I then essentially lost a best friend that had taught me everything, from shooting my first rabbit as a small child to, yeah, my first muntjac and roe deer and yeah, stood with me shooting my first pheasant. So it. That took a toll on me again, which sent me, yeah, further into the hole as such. So that's, that's sort of where I was there. I then was out one day out doing crop protection, so shooting pigeons in the uk. So sat there one day and I decided that something needed to happen. Young men like myself in my early 20s couldn't sit and wallow away in our self pity. So I decided to record a video from my hunting stand basically and sat and opened my heart out a bit like I am now and talked to the camera, just me and my camera and said, this needs to stop, we need to talk about it, we can't bottle it up, we can't hide away. So let's be honest with everyone and say I'm going through this and this might be why I might be in the way I am. And I felt a lot better for recording it and I put it on social media thinking friends and family would see it and it escalated a lot further and ended up, yeah, going not viral, but along the way to it. So I ended up with messages from people I've never met before telling me their circumstances and how seeing my video would help them to talk and discuss and open up, go to their gp, seek help. So that, that really, it helped me and I'm very, very glad that it helped other people to seek the help that they needed.

[Mike Axelrod]

And that's quite amazing how you just have no idea the kind of influence that you can have, especially in today's world. Right. That's the people moan and groan about social media and it's addictive tendencies and all the bad things that come from social media, but there's also absolutely amazing, incredible things that come from social media and the people that you can touch are. It's unheard of in society writ large for Time Memorial, the way that we can interact today as a society globally. Like your story probably touched somebody in New Zealand. You never know.

[Ryan Darby]

No, yeah, and it really did. It went all over and yeah. People, yeah. Opened up and talked about things and, and still do. Yeah. So it's, it's been a journey and it's been very.

[Mike Axelrod]

Are you still talking about it, Ryan? Or like, what is. Are you. Are you done now? Are you like, hey, I'm.

[Ryan Darby]

I'm good to go or so I manage it. There are. I do still have low days. I. I no longer take my antidepressants I am. I stopped taking those with my, my doctor's agreement. So moved away from those. I think basically from that day when I made that be, I decided right, let's, let's pull yourself out of this and let's do something about it. So now I especially working for basc, now I have. I had the opportunity to put a piece into our magazine, Shooting and Conservation, which meant that I could, I could write an article and, and, and tell my story like I am now about what's going on and this has happened with me and that people shouldn't be afraid about going to their doctor and talking about their mental health. They shouldn't be afraid about the police giving them a call. As long as you're. You're genuine with them and saying the right things that you, you do need your guns to, to be able to continue your recreational activity where you. You feel safe and that you are safe with it, then. Yeah, make sure that you, you carry on.

[Mike Axelrod]

When did that video post?

[Ryan Darby]

I posted that video several years ago on my social media, so I can probably find it.

[Mike Axelrod]

And you still, you think you're still getting people talking about it or you still talking about on your social media, you still talking about mental health on your social media?

[Ryan Darby]

Completely unprovoked by me. It go. It does the rounds again and gets reshared and people come to me saying is this you? But you look a lot younger. Yes. So, but no, it's. It was a, it was a great opportunity to write or record a video. And yeah, like I said, I thought it would just go to, to me, my parents and my friends and.

[Mike Axelrod]

And you again, you did it for what reason? Just to get things off your chest?

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, I did it for me. I think. I think I did it to. To put everything out in front of myself as to what I'm going through, what's going on and, and how I.

[Mike Axelrod]

Can help make it public really like this. Like. Okay, I'm letting everyone know that one. Who cares. Yes, here it is.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, so that's what I did. I don't know when I posted that, but it was a long time ago.

[Mike Axelrod]

It's okay. It's okay. Probably 21, 22 somewhere in there.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah, something like that. It was, it was just pre. Covered or early Covid when it happened. Okay. Yeah, it was that. And then from then I, then I moved away from the shooting industry for a while, decided to take a break and went into construction. So became, became a carpenter for a couple of years and just tried to do something else. For a little while and see if that would help me at all. But I found myself back in the shooting industry now.

[Mike Axelrod]

Missing it too much.

[Ryan Darby]

Oh, completely. Yeah. Yeah, it was. It was too much to be away. So now I look out there when they're working on roofs in the snow and I'm glad I'm not out there 100%. Yeah. So I really enjoy what I do now and I'm very lucky to be in the position I am. And, yeah, I feel like I. I now have an opportunity to. To tell this story much wider than what I did before, just with social media.

[Mike Axelrod]

Yeah, I agree. You know, and obviously working for Bask, you get to interact with a bunch of people and, you know, those lead to different stories and different people that you're. You're interacting with. And, you know, this podcast, hopefully is going to. Well, not. Hopefully, it will reach people that hear your story and go, man, I'm having. I've got the same story. Just like the reactions you got to that original video.

[Ryan Darby]

Yeah. So. And then, yeah, my S and C article. So I put that in. So into our. Our magazine at work that goes out to 150,000 individuals in the UK. So that. That was a. Again, another opportunity for that to go around and people read it, emails coming to me off the back of it with people's own stories that I can't share. But it was their opportunity to vent with me and to, I think, again, lay it out on a page for themselves as to what they're doing and for me to offer some advice as to how they move on next. A lot of people, it's a crazy.

[Mike Axelrod]

Position to be in, huh? In terms of, like, the roles have reversed, like, oh, you're the mentor now. You're the psychologist now. You're the. Yeah, you're that person.

[Ryan Darby]

I think that the hardest thing is asking for help at the start, and once you've asked for help, everything becomes so much easier. But it's having that.

[Mike Axelrod]

Is it. Do you think there's still a massive stigma around that today?

[Ryan Darby]

There. There definitely is immense mental health that there completely is still that stigma. And we are trying our hardest where we can to try and change that in all sorts of different ways. So at vasp, we work with another company called the gwt, the Gamekeepers Welfare Trust. We work closely with Helen there and we try and bring her along to a lot of our shows and give people an MOT on the day. So blood pressure and a bit of a chat just about how you're doing and what we can do. Yeah. We're. We're trying to. Yeah. Fight for it for people.

[Mike Axelrod]

Why do you think the stigma is still around today, Ryan?

[Ryan Darby]

I think it's. It's always been that we're men and we don't show our emotions, and it's. It's time that we started to discuss them more. Yeah, we need to. To get it out in the open and make it more public and not be afraid to talk about what we're actually. What we're doing behind closed doors and what's going on in our heads.

[Mike Axelrod]

I agree, man. I agree. I have had not a story like yours, but I've similarly had trauma in my early teenage life that I, at that point, just completely bottled up and completely forgot about and living this world of blood origins. Now I've actually. I actually got to walk in the footsteps that I did when I was that young teenage boy. And we actually stayed in a campsite that had traumatic issues for me. And the lady who ran the campsite was still there 25 years later, 30 years later. And luckily, I have a great team. And I literally just. I told them, I said, look, guys, I don't know. You don't know. One of the. All three of them knew me very well. One of them didn't know me from Bar of Soap. As I said, I'm. I'm about to just let everything out, and you're going to have to listen because I just need to talk and I need to get this all off my chest right now. And it was almost like a cathartic experience. Like, it was almost like I had to just tell everybody. I think it was just a different scenario to yours. But, you know, all these things that were going through my brain in terms of thinking and this is what I thought it was, and then getting almost affirmation from these guys that was. You are right to think the way that you think. Don't think that it's anything but horrendous what happened. So, yeah, it's. I totally feel you. I totally understand where you're coming from. And I'll be the first to say that I haven't. You know, I think once that happened, once that experience happened, I felt like I dealt with every or most of the demons that were inside me. My wife still says, I think you should go see someone. And I haven't. I probably will. But again, just talking it out loud to someone that didn't happen to be a psychologist, happened to be four people that worked with me very closely, was an incredible cathartic relaying of stuff that was just incredible from my perspective.

[Ryan Darby]

So opening up the first time is the hardest and the strongest thing that you will do. But once you open up that first time, it will get easier and you will be able to share that story with specialists and doctors and they will be able to help rebuild you and get you back where you want to be.

[Mike Axelrod]

Yeah, 100%. Ryan, thank you so much. I really appreciate you. I really appreciate you opening your story. And I know that obviously there's a lot of people listening to this that probably again, like me, have similar stories, similar stories in their backgrounds. And as you said, don't hesitate to ask for help. Don't hesitate to, to reach out to anybody that you feel like you can talk to and talk to them. Right.

[Ryan Darby]

Completely. And again, always lend that air to somebody else as well. So if you've got friends again that you, you can lend an ear to and just ask, are you okay? And they'll just say, yes, I am. And they know, really, are you okay? Because that might just be that moment that gives them the confidence to say, actually no, I'm not. And this is what's going on. So we just need to look out for each other at the same time.

[Mike Axelrod]

Yes, sir. Well, I appreciate you, Ron. Thank you.

[Ryan Darby]

Thank you, Falconeck.

[Mike Axelrod]

Well, that's it for today. I appreciate you listening. As always, leave a review, share it with your friends and most importantly, do what's right to convey the truth around hunting.

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