← BNI & The Power of One
BNI & The Power of One
BNI 800: Special Guest - BNI CEO Mary Kennedy Thompson!
00:41:38
To celebrate our 800th episode we were honored to interview BNI's CEO Mary Kennedy Thompson! Mary Kennedy Thompson is a powerhouse in the world of franchising! With over 30 years of experience, she has led businesses of all sizes, driven global...
Loading summary
Transcript116 lines
- [00:26]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Foreign.
- [00:40]
Tim
Welcome back to B and I and the Power of One podcast. We are on our 800th episode, which is crazy and I appreciate everybody continuing to tune in. We have a very special guest. I kind of let everybody know I would have a special guest, but didn't tell him who. I did tell him it wasn't gonna be Dr. Meisner this time. So I think it's somebody even, even more special at this time. With me is Mary Kennedy Thompson, who is BNI's newest CEO. Although I say new, it's almost a year now. It's coming. Crazy, yeah, goes by fast. Mary is a powerhouse in the world of franchising, which I got to witness firsthand at the IFA convention in February and just how well connected you are. With over 30 years of experience, she's led businesses of all sizes, Dr. Expansion and spearheaded high growth transformation. So before joining BNI in 2024, July, I believe. Yes, yes. She was the CEO of Neighborly. Neighborly is pretty well known amongst BNI with all their different brands, the largest home service company in the world. Mary's a Marine Corps veteran, a dynamic franchise leader, award winning executive, and her passion for empowering entrepreneurs is unmatched. And her journey as a franchise owner and once BNI member to industry trailblazing makes her leadership B and I a game changer. And that's what we're going to talk about today. So she's going to be igniting new opportunities for members and franchisees worldwide. So first of all, thank you. I know you're crazy busy and everything. I really appreciate you taking time to be on this and help us celebrate our 800th episode.
- [02:14]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Well, Tim, first of all, I'm honored that you would have me on your podcast at all, especially on such a momentous occasion as your 800th. And I, I send you congratulations for two parts. There are not many people in the world who have done 800 anythings and so to have done 800 podcasts, that's an impressive feat. And the reason that we were together at the International Franchise association convention is because we were honoring you as our B and I Franchisee of the year. And I want to once again congratulate you for your excellent work and all that you do because we were really excited to get to celebrate you.
- [02:46]
Tim
Yeah, I was, I was very honored. Although my brain always goes to. They must have been pressed for time and I was the easy, easy picture, but I appreciate it. I think some other people would think a little bit crazy, but I know you've been in now for coming up on a year, I know for most it would be kind of a, a journey of learning I would imagine your first year. So I'm excited to hear from you and kind of what you have learned because you are a member. How many years ago was it that you were actually a member?
- [03:15]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
30. I actually in 1994 I joined as a member. I, I hadn't even opened my first location. I was a multi unit franchisee in a company called Cookies by Design and my insurance agent, her name is Nancy, invited me to come visit their meeting. I ended up getting a really great referral with a little company called Dell Computers. And we, the product, they were very new back then.
- [03:40]
Tim
Yeah.
- [03:40]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And they asked us to help them with their product launches for gifts. But the reason I stayed was I was very new in business ownership. As you said. I'd come out of the Marine Corps and I had this great group of business leaders that really helped hone my skills and made me much better as a, as a business leader.
- [03:59]
Tim
Yeah, I think so much has changed over BNI over the years I've been in. May will be my 24th year. 20 years. January is my anniversary, 20th anniversary as a franchise owner. Executive director. Yeah, it's more, it's more years of my life than not. Which is kind of crazy insane as being part of the organization. 20 years. My entire adult life basically. But a lot has changed. But a lot hasn't. I mean what you witnessed 30 years ago and that I would argue is very much the driving force behind BNI to this day. So you had, let's just start with how you got back to bni. You, you had this amazing career in franchising and with neighborly and helped that company become what it is. And what led you back to getting involved as our CEO with this organization.
- [04:48]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
You know, it's so interesting. I, I really thought I was going to retire from neighborly. I'd been there 18 years. I'd been the chief operating officer for 10 of those years. I had been part of a group of leaders that we helped take it from 425 million to 4.3 billion. Really proud of that. I think the, what I was most proud of was as we grew the company, we also grew the culture and made sure that the culture stayed strong and so very proud of that and just thought it was time. I'd been doing that for a long time. And Graham Weimiller, who was our CEO prior to me, I've known him for oh, going on a decade now. He has to have Coffee with me. And he said, we're looking for a CEO. We've been looking for a while. And I told the board, I could think of nobody better than you. I said, well, dang it, I'm going to have to buy your coffee now because I, the answer is no, thank you. I, I, I, I think I'm going to retire. And he said, well, would you, would you just hear me out? And it was interesting. My, my former boss, who I'd worked with for 18 years, that's how he brought me into neighborly. He actually said, just hear me out.
- [05:55]
Tim
All right, so now we know the trick. So if I need something, just hear me out for a second. Just hear me out.
- [06:01]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
It was, and know he was, I knew Bean and he was so enthusiastic. And not too long before that conversation, I had had a friend tell me, it's time for you to move from success to significance. And it really, it just, you know how sometimes someone will say something to you and it rumbles around in your head. It rumbles around, rumbles around. And you just, you know that there's a reason that it's rumbling around. And it was, and it struck me that I could make a difference here. And I, you know, I believe for leaders, you know, we're here to, we're here to serve and inspire others. That's why we, that's why leaders should be leaders.
- [06:37]
Tim
Yep.
- [06:37]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And I was excited. You know, BNI is a great organization that makes a difference and we have so many opportunities that it's almost too many and being able to put some focus and get our decision making at the next level. Leaders. And I've spent the last 30 years doing, working with fast growing organizations and I looked at and I saw B and I can B and I is uniquely poised. Even though we've grown every year for the last 40 years, we have not even touched on tapping our potential. Yeah, I was excited about that.
- [07:16]
Tim
I would agree with you. I think a lot of people struggle with seeing it, but I do, especially with your background too, I think is going to be really valuable for the organization. Just the connections you can make with some of these other national franchise brands that it's funny that BNI is 40 years old and how many people still have no idea it exists? You know, I mean, it's still the world's best kept secret.
- [07:36]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
It was interesting. I had some people when it was announced, I can't believe you're leaving franchising. I said, I'm leaving franchising. BNI is a great franchise.
- [07:44]
Tim
Right.
- [07:44]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And Franchisors, a lot of their franchisees would benefit and do benefit from being a BNI member. And so it's been great being able to share that story out to our franchising community.
- [07:57]
Tim
Yeah, I mean, how many of those franchisees that benefit the franchisor doesn't even really know even then. Right. They found it on their own. Whatever. They got invited, like your story, they got invited and it wasn't pushed. So I think there's great opportunity. I B is very much a passion brand. I tell everybody if you don't have a passion for it, you're gonna not be very successful in it. I think one of the things that people don't know about you that really stood out to me when we met and talked about just, you know, when you first got involved and as you've gone through is your commitment to it. You live in Texas and fly every week to Charlotte. I don't think many people are willing to do that, you know, I mean, for, for a position like this, even a position like this.
- [08:38]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Well, first of all, you know, we are in the office full time and have been for a very long time, you know, obviously up through Covid and then as soon as we could get back in the office. We are a networking company and we know the power of getting face to face. And While we're in 77 countries and we have quite a distributed workforce, we know the more we can gather and get together, the more we're going to get accomplished. It's funny, John Julius wrote a really interesting book called the Relationship Economy. And he was talking about, he has this part where he talks about, you should not confuse digital connectivity with human connection. And he says, you know, the proliferation of robotic and online interactions makes the capacity to form human relationships an essential business skill. And part of forming human relationships is the one to one, the getting together, the gathering. And so I'm here because that's where I can make the biggest difference. And going back and forth, I used to commute an hour and a half into Dallas each way every day. And it's a shorter commute to fly home on a Friday than it used to be every day going into to Dallas. So I look at it and as a leader I need to make those connections, which is why I also joined.
- [09:52]
Tim
A chapter because yeah, that's another thing most people don't realize. You got the top, top people in the corporate office all how many are in chapters now?
- [10:00]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Oh, I think it's like 20 of us that joined chapters in, in over the last six Months. And originally I was just going to join a chapter for about three months.
- [10:09]
Tim
Yeah.
- [10:10]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And just learn, you know, in our strategic pillars, our left cornerstone, which is what you build off of everything you start says members first. It is the most important thing we do. High growth organizations always focus first on the customer experience. And I, I tell people if we had, if I was leading a hamburger company, I would eat a hamburger every day. Thank goodness I'm not because it would probably do me.
- [10:33]
Tim
You did own a cookie company. I mean, that sounds, doesn't sound like the worst of things in the world.
- [10:37]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I did eat a cookie every day.
- [10:38]
Tim
Yeah. That's. Yeah, that sounds amazing. I so a lot. Not everybody. It's been a while now. I served as national director for three years and so I would go to Charlotte a lot and I remember being in meetings with people and they would start arguing like about what the members need to do or what we need to do. And my counterargument always was like, are you going to go to the chapter and try to have that conversation? You know, I mean, do you know what it feels like to schedule a one to one every week? Do you know what it feels like? So again, this is another thing that really impressed me when I found out that you did that. Because I think that's a key element of any changes we're going to ever make as an organization has to be from the perspective of what it feels like as a member. It's very easy to be like, oh, they just need to do that. It's like, have you ever done it? Have you ever even tried to do it? Have you tried to find a visitor? It's not as easy.
- [11:28]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I learned that in the Marine Corps. The Marine Corps said, you know, everyone's a rifleman first here, everyone's a member first. That's what we're doing. That's who we are. That is what we do. And it was interesting. We do an exercise here at the end of the year. We talk about what was our biggest lesson for the year and how are we applying it and we're going forward. My entire executive leadership team all said the biggest lesson came from being a chapter member and understanding how the experiences and how it changes people 100%. It absolutely changes people. And I've been really studying quite a bit more on how important it is to, to connect one to one. And Forbes put out an article in late 23 and they talked about in the rise of the relationship economy, what were the best qualities that companies had that would make them successful. And this Definitely can be said of bni. But any company that follows what B and I teaches will do that. That's first putting the customer experience first. Understanding everything that your customer is experiencing and their satisfaction first. High transparency. You know, I really like how we've got B and I connect. I can see if I have my referrals, I can see what business is closed. That transparency of understanding what is doing for me that has a companies that have a shared values. One of the things that drew me to BNI were our seven values. I love the giver's gain. I've been studying the abundance mindset for about five years now. Those who look for scarcity find it and those who look for abundance find it. And then you know, having a sense of connection. It is the human connection that is going to grow business. I often say it's not politicians who bring the world together, it's business people who want to do business with one another, who want to connect with one another and then you know, making sure that we turn our customers into brand ambassadors. I think that's part of what we do at BNI is we're our brand ambassadors for all these other companies and then creating a positive impact. You know our mission is to grow our members businesses, period. That's our mission to help grow our members businesses. So I was very drawn to this company because those qualities are there and when you tie it to our values, everything from givers gain to building relationships to accountability and we, we have, you know, we have accountability that we have here on attending meetings and doing one to ones and making sure that, that we're doing the things that create that connectivity.
- [14:02]
Tim
So over the last nine months or so you've been on quite the world tour for anybody who follows you online obviously and I'm assuming have been learning a lot. And so kind of a two part question. I'm curious if there's anything that you've learned that was maybe unexpected or surprising as, as you traveled from you know, time taking the role to do that and to what do you think is the, the opportunities for BNI moving forward over the next five to 10 years.
- [14:35]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
So the first week of February is international networking week and we have a long standing tradition, I think it was 14 year tradition of the CEO doing five countries in five days. And I started off like oh you've got to be kidding. I said I will do it one time and I'll see if the juice is worth the squeeze. And it was. And probably one of my biggest lessons came during that week. We talk about the power of DNI and what it does and how it helps people. But I, that week I met with about a thousand people. It's about 200 people a day. I could not believe some of the stories that, that people, people would stop and say, I need you to hear this story. I need you to know. And one of them was from a gentleman whose son had been in a terrible bicycling accident and it made him a paraplegic. And course he spent a lot of time in the hospital and when it was time for him to come home, their home was not ready for him to come home and he didn't know what to do. And he put a message out to his chapter and said, you know, I can you help connect me with people who can help me do this because I can't bring my son home until the home is adapted for him. In two days they had the home adapted for him.
- [15:43]
Tim
Crazy.
- [15:44]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And that connection, you know, when we say we want to change the way the world does business, it is personal. It is not just business. It's personal. So my biggest surprise was, you know, you said it's, you know, this is not just this. It's a, it's a calling, it's a passion, it's, it's personal. And so that was my, my biggest surprise was how much so that is and why it matters. And then, you know, our biggest opportunity is channeling our opportunities. So there are many, you know, I'll Bet we have 5,000 ideas and 4,999 of them are really good. But we're not gonna be able to do all those and not all at once, nor should we, nor is it good business to do that. So it's been channeling the best ideas to really focus and align us. So we've been two parts aligning the organization on this is what we're doing right now. This is how we're going to get there. This is why it matters, you know, and you know, Tim, you' seen me talk about and share our strategic pillars and, and we even just in one to ones, but also in a macro level at our group and even getting everybody in our organization on a scorecard. You want to talk about alignment? If when everybody in the organization knows what they do, how it rolls up to which pillars, you start to have real alignment and passion because you understand what the work does, how it's going to affect and help the organization you're part of. And so that's our opportunity. And it's, you know, it's a First world problem to have, but it's still something that we have to pay attention to. You know, I've heard people say before, let's not boil the ocean, right? And let's, let's take a, let's take this great idea. I'd rather take an 80% idea and execute it 100%. And take 100% idea and execute it at 80%.
- [17:40]
Tim
Yeah. I don't think there's ever going to be any shortage of you guys getting inundated with why don't we have, why don't we do, what can we do next kind of things. I think it's like you said, it's a problem, but it's a good problem because there is so much that can be done. Where do you see just the speed of technology, the speed of AI, the speed of these things coming into the world, where do you see that having an impact either positively or negatively, for, for us?
- [18:08]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Well, the only way it will be negative is if we were to ignore it, which we're not. And, and you know, we could, it'd be easy for us to say, hey, we're all about the human connection. We don't need to think about it. But I think that there's a way to use AI. I believe there's a way to use AI that helps and encourages the human connection. And so we are, we have been, we've been doing an RFP for a couple different AI companies to add a way that we can connect because we have great data. We have more data than data is just data. Data then needs to create information, and information makes the stories, and then the stories tell us what we should do. And so there are ways that we're going to be able to use AI that helps our members and that in a chapter, both at a local level and a global level, that says based on this information about you, not you in general, but you specifically, Tim, your best connection is Mary over here, based on her information specifically.
- [19:14]
Tim
Right.
- [19:15]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I don't want to use AI to get in the middle of the relationship. I want to use AI to enable the relationship. And we're starting to do that. We have some tests going on that are testing well, and, and then that's where we will move. And I also think our other opportunity in technology is to simplify, simplify, simplify. Yes, you know, get everything to one place and which is what we're in the process of doing right now. Make it easier for us members, for you as a member to have that, that, that, that those resources at your fingertips. So you don't have to go here and here. I don't know about you, but sometimes I'll get a. I'll remember somebody sent me a message and says, can you call me? I don't know if they send it to me on teams or my cell phone or an email or something on social media. So the more we can get that simplified, it's hard to make things simple. The more we can do that, I think the more streamlined that experience will be.
- [20:14]
Tim
Yeah, I think the future of the tech is amazing. I'm kind of a little passionate about it. I've bought in many years ago, so this is credit to Nate Dominguez, who I know you know, I do. He said it years and years ago that our goal should be to make it easier to be a member. And I just 100% believe in that. I think BNI is very good at making it very difficult to be a member at times. And that's why, again, I think you guys being in chapters is so important to kind of experience. And I think AI or tech can help that it doesn't eliminate everything. I think that's our challenge is some people think like, oh, I'll just network via AI or I see members now and even team members now who are, you know, writing emails using AI. And it's just so impersonal. You can pick up on it. It's like, this is not where we want to go with this. We want to make it easier, streamline application processes, streamline those kind of things. Sure. But you still got to do the. The actual, you know, contact sport of networking and. And press the flesh.
- [21:11]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I want to be the Amazon of all B2B.
- [21:16]
Tim
Yeah, connect.
- [21:17]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And if you think about it, I use Amazon. So I will see an ad for something or someone will tell me, oh, I bought these ABC shoes. Yeah, I literally go onto Amazon and I type in ABC shoots right? And I go, here they are. And I go click, buy them. And tomorrow they're at my house. And I could probably buy those ABC shoes cheaper if I went to the ABC site and figured it out and put in all my information. So we need to use technology to make that seamless, frictionless experience for our members. Now, there are parts about the experience like doing one to ones and being face to face and coming to meetings. That's always going to take work, and it should, because the important things take work. But the things that we can make easier, we can and will and are already starting to.
- [22:04]
Tim
Yeah, it's just going to amplify that effort. That you're putting into the relationship. It's going to. Yeah, there's all kinds of visions around that. Some of I've talked about previously. I think the product that we offer is often misunderstood too. I think this. And at the highest levels I used to get into arguments all the time about this because even like from a member it looks like, oh, my products is. I'm part of a networking group and I would always argue like that's like what you get involved in. But what BNI really offers is all the intangible other pieces to it. It's the tech availability. Right. So this is the investments you guys are making. The investments we make as franchisees. To have the global scale of that is unmatched if done right. It's the coaching, the support, it's the training that keeps getting amplified even with tech making it easier. And then it's ultimately what we do is the leadership of getting people to do those things. I always use the analogy. It's like we're, we're like physical trainers. Right. Like I don't want to do the push ups but they make me do the push ups. The same kind of thing. Like you don't want to do the one to ones. I get it. But my job is to motivate you to get to do them, to understand why. So I think we're the ultimate leadership organization. And I've always looked at leadership as kind of twofold. There's the follow me because my title tells me. Tells you you have to.
- [23:28]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
That's level one leadership.
- [23:29]
Tim
Yeah, I don't, I don't deal well with that person.
- [23:31]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah, yeah, me either.
- [23:33]
Tim
And then there's, you know, the Follow me because you want to and, and I'm leading the way. I, I'd love to get just kind of your take on leadership and the role it plays in, in bni all the way down. Because I do think it plays all the way down, you know, from you obviously at the very tippity top to right down to the member level. We have leadership roles in every chapter.
- [23:52]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah. You know, Maxwell says level five leadership is when you're building leaders all around you.
- [23:57]
Tim
Yep.
- [23:58]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I really believe bni, our focus can and should be and is often on the level five leadership. Building leaders. And sometimes I'll be in a group and someone will say, well I'm not really a leader. I'm here because I'm a sales rep meeting with people or I'm, you know, I'm the manager for that office. Not really a leader. And I always Tell them everybody's a leader. There are four levels of leadership. You lead yourself because you can't lead anybody unless you can lead yourself first. You lead others, you lead leaders and you lead organizations. And at any given time, you could have, you could be doing any one of those four or all of those. But you can't lead an organization if you can't lead yourself. And so I always encourage people to start by. And leaders are built. They are not born, they are built. And we have to have that mindset and understand that. Actually, the Rainbow did a really interesting set of studies on those that look at it from leadership. Leadership built. It's stronger leaders, they make stronger leaders. And so, you know, leadership has been a subject near and dear to my heart for the last 40 years. I have been a student of leadership and continue to be a student of leadership. I always like what Margaret Thatcher said. She said being a leader is like being a lady. If you have to tell someone you're one, you're not.
- [25:11]
Tim
I so I love that line, by the way. And I would argue that all the time, even at B and I. It's like if you have to tell me in charge, you're not in charge immediately. I know you're not in charge.
- [25:22]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
You have to lead with your title, then you're not in the right place. Leadership is about influence. It's about inspiring others, it's about serving others. And so what part of what I really like about how BNI does it and you, you kind of touched on it with, you know, if you joined a gym.
- [25:39]
Tim
Yep.
- [25:40]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And you have a membership and you get a trainer but you don't show up and then you complain, I'm paying for this gym membership and look at me, I'm not in any kind of shape. Well, you have to put the effort in. And that's why I start with lead self is are you doing the things that are going to create the changes that you seek? And if I were writing a book, my book would start with this sentence. Comfort is the enemy of growth.
- [26:03]
Tim
Yep.
- [26:04]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
If you want to grow, you have to be willing to allow yourself to be uncomfortable. And leaders that lead high growth organizations, they start with allowing themselves to be uncomfortable. They're comfortable with allowing others to be uncomfortable. They, they seek out ways to disintermediate their own organization and they seek out change before change is thrust upon them. And so that's a part of leadership. And you know, I, I go to all my chapter meetings and it's every week as an hour and a half every week, and it's some of my best spent time. But if I didn't show up, I'd have a thousand reasons why it didn't quite work for me.
- [26:41]
Tim
Yeah, I always say BNI like the gym. It's an opportunity. That's what your membership ultimately is. Right. You've got all these tools and you've got this amazing opportunity, but at the end of the day, it's what do you do with it? And that's on you to figure that out. So one of the challenges to get a little frank with BNI that I've experienced over the years, and I'm just curious around leadership and how you've handled it in the past, because there's no way you haven't witnessed this before. But I do think we are an organization that maybe, I mean, it's probably just a perception issue, but I feel like might be higher than others. And you might tell me, actually it's very much the same. I have seen over the years and to this day where people title chase in our organization, there's a lot of titles in bni. There's a lot of different, you know, things you can get. And that has always been frustrating to me because people title chase and then that's their vision of leadership and, and it's been allowed to happen. I think, you know, it's probably hard to avoid. But I'm curious how you avoid it, because with that follow up, my biggest pet peeve in the world, and everybody on the podcast knows this is hypocrisy. It's like, don't tell me to do something you ain't willing to do kind of thing that really just crawls up my backside. So how, how have you, you obviously, I'm gonna assume, experienced it. How do you deal with that at your level when you start seeing these kind of cultures that almost placate to the, the next title, the next thing.
- [28:04]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Well, you know, that's why the Margaret Thatcher quote is one of my favorites, because I really, I think weak leadership are those who need a title.
- [28:12]
Tim
Yeah.
- [28:13]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Strong leaders. And I watch this, I watch this with people who, who quietly lead. And you, you, they're the, they're the, the leader. You, you can look and see. They're the thought leaders within an organization, but they don't hold a title or they don't, they don't lead with their title. So first of all, it is very common. I, I wish I could say I've not been in any organization that I have not seen that.
- [28:35]
Tim
Yeah, I think a lot of people listening probably have. So it's interesting.
- [28:38]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah.
- [28:39]
Tim
Dilemma.
- [28:39]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah. And, and I probably suffered from it myself there, you know, in my youth, I, I wanted people to listen to me, and I thought a title would give, would make people listen to me. And I learned otherwise. I learned that people listen to you when you have something to say and you have been there or done that. You know, sometimes I had a franchisee that used to wear this bracelet that said counsel or opinion.
- [29:03]
Tim
Okay.
- [29:03]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And we had had a speaker, and I, I, I, I almost started wearing one myself because I liked it so much. Everyone, not everyone, but a lot of people will have will. Some say to you, you shouldn't do this or you should do that or. And it's people who maybe have never been there or done that. So good counsel is somebody who has skin in the game who's been there and done that and cares about you. That's good counsel. Everything else is just an opinion.
- [29:28]
Tim
I like that.
- [29:29]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah. And, and she used to always say, I asked myself this all the time, is it, you know, because when I went into business, I had people that were either family or friends, like, oh, you're really sure you want to do that? They've never done it before. They didn't, they hadn't been there, done that. They, you know, they didn't have that experience. And so I asked myself that in when you think about a title. So when I see a leader that is actively. When someone says to me, well, I want to someday be blah, blah, blah, my first question is, why?
- [29:59]
Tim
Right.
- [30:00]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
What is your motivation behind that? Leaders should be, want to be leaders so they can inspire and serve others. You know, and anyone who will listen to me when I talk about the word inspire. The root of the word inspire means to breathe life into. Our job is to breathe life into people. It's to get them to do things they might not have done on their own by themselves, to inspire them to be a better version of themselves. I worked for a leader for 18 years who inspired me to be a better human, a better leader, a better executive by his actions, not by his words. And he didn't need a title. He never introduced himself by his title, but he made a difference when, when he passed away, that people who talked about the things he did personally and were, were remarkable. You know, one of the service professionals that was a plumber, still is a plumber, called me after he passed away and said, you know, when he came out, he came out and he called me out to do work at his house, and I wouldn't charge him for it. He said, you better charge me for it. But you know this. You have to charge me for it. You wouldn't. And he had told me that. And I told him that my wife had been really sick and really sick with cancer. And he made a huge donation to the Cancer Society in my wife's name. And he never. I never knew that story. He never told me that story. Nobody else knew that story. He just did it. And he changed that plumber's life. He said, I want to be like that person. People follow people. They want to be like. They don't follow people because of titles. And if they follow people because of titles, they're in the wrong space. So I think the first thing you have to ask yourself is, why do I want that title? You know, if I want that, you know, why do I want to do this? Because if I just want the title, I shouldn't be doing it. But if I want to do this, like, when I realized I do want to come serve BNI because I thought I could make a difference. Yeah, that really resonated with me. And so why? You know, Simon Sinek has a book, First Start with why, and I did a couple of his seminars, and they're very uncomfortable because you have to get. You have to really dig deep into your soul. And my why is very clear for me. I inspire business leaders to reach their hopes, wishes, dreams, and goals beyond their wildest imagination. So. And then the other thing I will say on leadership, and you taught, you touched on this. We must be willing to be ruthlessly authentic to who we really are.
- [32:26]
Tim
Yep.
- [32:27]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Now it's not okay to say, well, this is just the way I'm built, and you're going to have to deal with it. That's not ruthlessly authentic. Because, you know, one of our values is lifelong learning. You should be growing and learning. You need to understand who you are. And to be ruthlessly authentic, you have to be okay with disappointing some people 100%.
- [32:44]
Tim
I think I had to learn that the hard way. I went through all those stages, too, because, again, I got a title in BNI very young. I mean, I was 23 when I became. Yeah. And I became an executive director. And I used to go around being like, you have to listen to me because I'm the executive director kind of stuff. And that's definitely changed over the years. So. And I. And I asked that, because, again, go to full circle. That's what impressed me about you, was that you didn't want the role to begin with. Like that whole story of the coffee. And I said, no, that tells me something because again, you know, you have leaders who get in positions because of, you know, just natural progression or because, you know, again, they, they bought the company or people could be like, you know, I was, because my parents were what have you. And people end up in the wrong position. And in this organization, it really matters. I think in any organization, it matters. But when you come down to what we do, which again is inspire activity, our job is to get people to do activity. They don't want to do that we know they need to.
- [33:43]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
It doesn't feel comfortable.
- [33:45]
Tim
Right.
- [33:45]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
For a long time.
- [33:46]
Tim
Right. And so without that proper leadership, you're going to really, really struggle, no matter what level we're at with it, because everything trickles down. So from you, inspiring your teams who have to inspire us to inspire our teams who inspire the leaders, who inspire the members. Like if any cog in that wheel at the top can really be quite disruptive.
- [34:05]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah. I'm sure you've heard that saying. Your actions are so loud I can't hear your words.
- [34:10]
Tim
Yep.
- [34:10]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
You know it. One of the Marine Corps 11 Marine Corps leadership principles. One of them is set the example. My favorite one, if you're this person over here and you tell everybody to be this person, people will follow you because they want to be like you.
- [34:24]
Tim
Yeah.
- [34:24]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
So if you're not, if you are not ruthlessly authentic, growing yourself regularly, understanding the law of the lid, that your organization will only grow as fast as you can grow yourself. You. You will. Your organization will not outgrow you. They'll just stay stagnant 100%.
- [34:37]
Tim
Have you read the book by Simon Sinek, the Eaters Eat Last?
- [34:40]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yes.
- [34:41]
Tim
And it's all about that military. Right. And such a.
- [34:44]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
That's what Marine Corps taught me. I always eat last. It also taught me that I must eat because for me to take care of others, I must also eat and, and take. You know, we don't have. Leaders don't have the luxury of saying, I'm tired or I'm hungry. You must take care of yourself because you can't take care of anybody else. But you eat.
- [35:00]
Tim
Right. You got last in line. I, I think that's, you know, Dr. Miser would always say, I don't know. That's his original line. But, you know, nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.
- [35:11]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And that's actually Theodore Roosevelt.
- [35:14]
Tim
He always takes credit.
- [35:15]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah.
- [35:17]
Tim
But it's, it is true. And again, in this organization and, and I Will be. I mean, just being direct. Like, I do feel like for a few years we suffered from a lack of that feeling anyways. And so I'm excited about the future and what you're bringing to because it is inspiration top down and, you know, calling.
- [35:38]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
This is not a profession or a job. It's a calling.
- [35:41]
Tim
Right.
- [35:41]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And you know, you. I can see it with you. I see it with other of our, you know, franchisees, executive directors, and I see it within our associates as well. The ones that do really, really well, they're doing it because something speaks to them and that's what we got to make sure that we do that. And that means allowing leaders at various levels to make decisions that sometimes, you know, I'm a fan of failing forward.
- [36:07]
Tim
Yep.
- [36:08]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
You know, we, we let people, you know, I have to have a safety net up to make sure that, you know, we're doing things right, but I got to, I have to allow my, my leaders to make decisions and learn from them.
- [36:19]
Tim
Yeah. And then prove themselves either way. Right. Do they learn from it or do they just keep repeating it? Yeah. I think by. So the Simon Sinek why? Question is always. We talk about that in our regions a lot for members. One of the things I think BNI struggles with from a member level is people join without any clear understanding of why they're joining. Right. So we try to get them to think beyond referrals and how do they define success and why is that important? Because this will be the easiest thing in the world not to do or to give up on at a member level. And mine was the same thing. Like, my passion comes from the fact that I watch my parents struggle as members. And, you know, I didn't realize that until years later. So I appreciate you sharing yours and your vision. I'm super excited about it and I thank you.
- [37:03]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I am too. And I appreciate, you know, one of the. You and I have broken bread together, had a meal together. I'm encouraging people to share and share with me because I have a lot to learn. It has been a journey of learning and it will continue to be a journey of learning. I1 took me a long time to learn this. When I feel or think I'm very definite about something, that's usually the time I need to start listening to everybody else because I'm. I'm usually missing something in that. In that zeal to be right or that zeal to say, I know I like the practice of social, which is the beginner's mind. Once you think you've mastered Something go back to the beginning and learn again because you will learn things you didn't know.
- [37:44]
Tim
Yeah, absolutely. So this is downloaded across the world. We got members from everywhere. What is the best way if members, you know, have something they want to share or thoughts and those kind of. How do you guys encouraging to get there, their input?
- [37:58]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Well, there's a lot of different ways and first of all what I would say is I encourage the open collaboration and conversation amongst all the different levels. So I always say share it with your chapter leadership, chapter leaders. Share it with your executive directors, your, you know, managing directors, managing directors and executive directors. Share it with the operational folks at the headquarters. Share it with me. You know, I'm on BNI Connect. You can find my profile pretty easily. I look like just like you. You know, I am and you can send me a message. Now what I may do is I may say thank you for sharing that. I want to get you talking to this person because if I'm the solution to everything, we're not going to go anywhere. It needs to be all of us being a solution. I, I encourage that. You know, I come to global convention, come to the national convention. I, I think I've got something like 37, 1 to 1 set up the week I'm in Houston.
- [38:59]
Tim
That's a lot. If you want to lose. I mean you don't have to be. I'm on your schedule somewhere we can save you.
- [39:03]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I love that. That's, that's how, but that's how we remember we are. We're an organization that's built around making human connections. We must do that regularly and practice that. I'm looking forward to it. Yeah, I think that's what's going to move the needle and get us to the next place. So, and you know, do that, share and talk about it. Make sure that what I always appreciate is one of our values is positivity. And I, I see, I see people be positive and I really like that. Make sure that you don't let positivity get in the way of giving honest feedback and you can give honest and you can be brave and have a conversation that matters and you don't have to do it in a mean way. You can do it in a way that the receiver can actually receive it. Do it though.
- [39:46]
Tim
I, I would speak to that. I mean and I would tell everybody, you know, at least even at my level, like you are responsive. I've done it just recently with one of our policy things and, and everything else.
- [39:57]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And so, and I think we, we Listened and we made a change based on what, the information you'd given us.
- [40:02]
Tim
Yeah. So, yeah.
- [40:03]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
No, And I will tell this to everybody. You're. I. I always promise you the truth. I cannot promise you're always going to like what you hear from me because I'm going to speak the truth. And there will be times when we say, no, we're not going to do that because we're doing this over here.
- [40:16]
Tim
Right.
- [40:17]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
No, this is not the time to do that. And. And there may be frustration. I'm okay with that.
- [40:23]
Tim
That's leadership, though. That's leadership. If you say yes to everything, you're going to disappoint everybody.
- [40:27]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
So say no if everything's priority. Nothing.
- [40:30]
Tim
Right. Right. So.
- [40:31]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Yeah.
- [40:31]
Tim
Well, again, I. I know you're pressed for. You're very busy, so I appreciate the time you're giving. Hopefully in the future, we'll have you on again.
- [40:38]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
I would love that. I'm honored that you'd have me on your 800. Congratulations.
- [40:42]
Tim
I think we're super excited about it and I look forward to seeing you in national conference. I definitely encourage members to be checking out national conferences, like you said, global conferences in Australia. So if you ever look for a reason to go there, this is a great one.
- [40:58]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
And the location we picked is fabulous. It's on the water. It's in the heart of downtown. You can get around everywhere. We're gonna have great entertainment. We're gonna have fantastic. Probably one of my favorite speakers ever is speaking at this convention. It was. I sought him out as soon as I said yes to B. And I said, I need you to come speak to this group.
- [41:14]
Tim
That's awesome. Yeah, awesome. Well, thank you again. I look forward to seeing you next week.
- [41:18]
Mary Kennedy Thompson
Thanks, Tim. You take good care. And as I say, every time I say ciao, because ciao means I'm at your service. So ciao.
- [41:25]
Tim
Appreciate it.