Breaking Beauty Podcast — "A Candid Conversation About Aging"

Episode: From IMO: The Look | November 14, 2025
Featured Speakers: Michelle Obama, Jane Fonda, Bethann Hardison, Jenna Lyons

Episode Overview

This episode is a unique blend of Breaking Beauty Podcast and a special preview of IMO: The Look, hosted by Michelle Obama and her brother, Craig Robinson. The focus here is on aging—particularly the experience of aging as women in the public eye, and more broadly, what it means to embrace maturity and purpose. Michelle is joined by iconic guests: actress Jane Fonda, model and activist Bethann Hardison, and designer Jenna Lyons. Together, they discuss the nuances, challenges, and freedoms that come with aging, the pressures of beauty standards, societal expectations, personal growth, and the importance of community and activism as life progresses.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Childhood & Early Expectations of Aging

• Michelle Obama recalls believing 60 was truly old because her grandparents’ generation accepted aging as an endpoint (04:16).
• As a child, Jane Fonda didn’t anticipate living past 30, shaped by her mother's early death and family hardship:

  “I’m not addictive, but I thought I was going to die from drugs and loneliness. So the fact that I’m almost 88 is astonishing to me.” (05:58)

2. Redefining Aging—Feeling Versus Appearance

• Bethann Hardison: Aging is more about how you feel than how you look. She only recently started noticing time’s effect on her body, but her “mind and spirit continue”:

  “I love being older because people jump to help you. And I love being older because I don’t act like it.” (06:44)

• Jane Fonda values intentionality and living without regrets:

  “If you don’t wanna die with regrets, then you have to live the last part of your life in such a way that there won’t be any regrets.” (08:37)

3. Aging and Health: Body, Baseline, and Balance

• The guests agree health is the foundation—knowing your "baseline" is important to recognize when something is wrong.

• Michelle balances healthy habits and indulgence:

  “You shouldn’t eat out and be worried about what you’re going to eat. Enjoy everything and take everything in.” (17:18)

• Jane Fonda stresses that the feeling of being old only arrives when health fails:

  “You don’t feel old as long as you’re healthy.” (11:24)

4. Evolving Fashion and Self-Expression

• Michelle Obama: Being tall was initially a struggle but became empowering with confidence and the right partner—embracing heels and her height:

  “Now that I … I love my height. I love a 4-inch heel … I completely own all of me.” (19:00)

• Jane Fonda shares a defining lesson from Katharine Hepburn about personal presentation:

  “This is your box. This is how you present. What do you want it to say?” (19:45)

• Bethann Hardison: Now fashion is less about self and more about helping others in the creative community (22:10).

• Jane Fonda has stopped buying new clothes, inspired by climate activism:

  “Greta Thunberg, the climate activist from Sweden … That’s what I look for now is recyclable, reused.” (22:48)

5. Love, Intimacy, and Friendship in Later Life

• Bethann Hardison on relationships:

  “I have people who take care of me and very nice people. … I just believe that women who are alone … should just let somebody who wants to come along and take care of them, love them, care for them. … It doesn’t even have to be sexual. … Intimacy is such an important thing, and it doesn’t have to be sexual.” (24:27)

• Jane Fonda prioritizes friendships:

  “My girlfriends are the world to me. They make me braver. They make me laugh. … Women look at each other and they’re not afraid to ask for help. … It feeds our soul.” (25:21)

6. Pressures of Aging—Industry Standards and Body Image

• Bethann Hardison never felt pressured by the fashion industry to "age out", crediting resilience and her unique outlook:

  “I’m gangster.” (26:48)

• Michelle Obama juxtaposes the high expectations for women versus the broader spectrum allowed for men.

• Jane Fonda: despite more inclusive representation for older women in media, progress is still recent and fragile.

• Jane is candid about growing up objectified, suffering from body dysmorphia and eating disorders, but finding freedom from concern with age:

  “At almost 88, I’m happy to say I don’t give a flying fuzzy rat’s ass. … I want to look good enough that I can get work, but I’m not worried about it anymore.” (31:02)

7. Personal History, Confidence & Identity

• Bethann Hardison shares her Brooklyn girlhood, including time in a territorial gang, attributing resilience and confidence to early independence:

  “I think people come to earth that have that. … Even though I was being oppressed, you were meant to grow.” (34:24)

• Michelle Obama: Confidence is often innate; as a parent, watching children’s unique personalities reinforce the role of nature:

  “There is a part of me that always felt like I knew certain things about myself, really young.” (35:06)

• Jane Fonda: Only in her 60s did she feel "her voice"—true self-assurance comes later for many:

  “I didn’t get a voice until I was in my 60s.” (36:12)

• There is consensus that writing, reflecting, and looking back helps clarify self-understanding and cultivate wisdom.

8. Societal Change: Representation and Activism

• Bethann Hardison recounts sparking inclusion in fashion with her letter to the industry in 2013:

  “No matter your intent, the result is racism. … I believed that they weren’t racist. I believed they were just… ignorant, and ignorant to me is much worse than racism.” (45:38)

• Michelle Obama and Jane Fonda discuss activism as both a personal and collective transformation:

  “I don’t feel like I really came into being until 1970, when I decided … I was never alone. I was part of a movement.” (49:50, 53:13)

9. Wisdom, Courage, and Letting Go

• Jane Fonda: Wisdom doesn’t come from having experiences, but from understanding them:

  “Wisdom doesn’t come from having a lot of experiences. It comes from understanding what they are.” (38:48)

• Michelle Obama is intentional about preparing the next generation:

  “As you age, for us to be intentional about making room. … Sometimes you have to let them lead whether they know all the answers or not.” (58:24)

• Jane Fonda: “We have to not be alone anymore. … Our democracy won’t survive if it’s each person for himself. We have to unite across sectors.” (61:29)

• Michelle Obama: Community sustains well-being and purpose throughout life’s later chapters:

  “It’s mostly community. It’s mostly having a big, broad set of people who I count on, that I feel nurtured by.” (63:35)

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Jane Fonda (05:58):
  “I thought I was going to die from drugs and loneliness. So the fact that I’m almost 88 is astonishing to me. … I wouldn’t go back for anything. I feel more centered, more whole, more complete.”

• Bethann Hardison (06:44):
  “I love being older because people jump to help you. And I love being older because I don’t act like it.”

• Jane Fonda (11:24):
  “You don’t feel old as long as you’re healthy.”

• Michelle Obama (17:18):
  “You shouldn’t eat out and be worried about what you’re going to eat. Enjoy everything and take everything in.”

• Jane Fonda (19:45):
  “This is your box. This is how you present. What do you want it to say?” (recounting Katharine Hepburn’s advice)

• Jane Fonda (31:02):
  “At almost 88, I’m happy to say I don’t give a flying fuzzy rat’s ass. … I want to look good enough that I can get work, but I’m not worried about it anymore.”

• Bethann Hardison (34:54):
  “I always had it. I think people come to earth that have that. I think you too, you came to earth with it. Well, no matter how much you were being oppressed, you were meant to grow.”

• Jane Fonda (38:48):
  “Wisdom doesn’t come from having a lot of experiences. It comes from understanding what they are.”

• Michelle Obama (58:24):
  “As you age…for us to be intentional about making room. … Sometimes you have to let them lead whether they know all the answers or not.”

• Jane Fonda (61:29):
  “Our democracy won’t survive if it’s each person for himself. We have to unite across sectors, and that’s what has to happen.”

• Michelle Obama (63:35):
  “It’s mostly community. It’s mostly having a big, broad set of people who I count on, that I feel nurtured by.”

Memorable Moments

• Katharine Hepburn’s advice to Jane Fonda about self-presentation (19:45): A turning point for Fonda in viewing fashion as more than vanity but as a statement.
• Bethann Hardison's approach to unconventional relationships (24:27): Emphasizing joy, care, and emotional connection, regardless of age or expectations.
• Jane Fonda on female friendship as a longevity secret (25:21): “That’s why I think was one of the main reasons why we live longer.”
• Hardison’s activism: the 2013 industry letter that changed fashion’s approach to diversity (45:38).
• Final thoughts on generational transition and courage (58:24–61:29): The group stresses the need for bravery, unity, and passing the torch.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Early memories/expectations of aging: 04:16 – 06:44
• Living intentionally, not fearing regrets: 08:17 – 09:21
• Baseline health and balance: 15:08 – 17:36
• Fashion, body image, and presentation: 18:04 – 22:48
• Relationships, love, and intimacy: 23:19 – 25:48
• Industry pressures on aging: 26:21 – 29:37
• Overcoming objectification & body issues: 31:02 – 32:16
• Roots of confidence & self-identity: 32:31 – 37:03
• Attaining wisdom and intentional reflection: 38:01 – 41:22
• Activism (Hardison’s letter, being part of a movement): 45:27 – 53:20
• Courage, change, and generational leadership: 58:24 – 62:12
• Role of community in happiness/longevity: 63:15 – 64:15

Conclusion

This episode offers an insightful, heartfelt, often humorous, and courageously vulnerable conversation among legendary women. It reframes aging not as a diminishment but as a passage to deeper purpose, community, and self-acceptance, with joy in the freedom it brings. The lessons extend far beyond beauty or fashion—touching on love, wisdom, legacy, and the essential need for collective courage in challenging times.