Build with Leila Hormozi

Episode 313 – 5 Behaviors Quietly Killing Your Executive Presence

Release Date: August 25, 2025
Host: Leila Hormozi

Episode Overview

In this episode, Leila Hormozi tackles the subtle but destructive habits that sabotage executive presence and leadership effectiveness. Drawing from her experiences scaling businesses and mentoring executives, Leila outlines five key behaviors that undermine trust, credibility, and authority in a leader. She offers practical advice on how to replace these weak behaviors with empowering habits that help establish unshakeable executive presence.

“If you cannot communicate like a leader, then you will never be trusted like one. So let me show you the five behaviors that are quietly killing your executive presence and exactly what to do instead.” (Leila, 00:11)

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Stop Over-explaining

• Problem: Over-explaining erodes trust and signals insecurity. Leaders who ramble lose their audience.
• Leila’s Experience:
  • Felt compelled to share everything on her mind out of insecurity or doubt.
  • Realized over-explaining was a result of not knowing how to simplify or out of nervousness.
• Impact:
  • Causes people to tune out.
  • Makes speaker appear less confident and less expert.
• Solution:
  • Say less, make every word count.
  • Embrace pauses—silence allows people to process and signals authority.
  • Constrain your talk time; focus on key points.
• Memorable Quote:

  “Authority is felt when one speaks as if they're expected to be heard, not as if they're hoping to be heard.” (Leila, 02:27)

• Practical Tip: Limit talk time in meetings to distill message to essentials.

Timestamps:

• [00:00] Importance of communication and trust in leadership
• [01:10] Causes and consequences of over-explaining
• [03:16] Practical exercises to condense communication

2. Stop Fidgeting

• Problem: Body language that signals nervousness overshadows spoken words. Fidgeting, gum chewing, slouching, and restless movements reduce perceived confidence.
• Leila’s Story:
  • Had a competent director whose nail-biting and hair playing undermined her authority.
  • Addressed this by suggesting fake nails, which immediately improved professional perception.
• Impact:
  • Audiences are distracted from the message.
  • Leaders who fidget appear uncertain, diminishing trust and attention.
• Solution:
  • Adopt slow, controlled, grounded posture and movements.
  • Use intentional gestures, stand tall, and maintain strong posture—even if you feel insecure.
• Memorable Quote:

  “What you say does not matter if your body language is saying the opposite.” (Leila, 05:19)

• Tip: Imagine how a CEO stands vs. an entry-level employee and emulate that presence.

Timestamps:

• [05:05] Why body language matters
• [07:40] Real example and actionable fixes
• [09:10] Visualizing executive presence

3. Stop Asking for Permission

• Problem: Waiting for approval before stepping up forfeits leadership opportunities to less qualified individuals.
• Leila’s Story:
  • In college, she took charge of a group project without being asked, which naturally positioned her as the leader.
• Insight:
  • Leadership is claimed through decisive, authoritative action, not appointed or waited upon.
• Impact:
  • Teams seek direction from those who create certainty amidst chaos.
  • Decisiveness builds momentum and trust; hesitation breeds doubt.
• Solution:
  • Don’t wait for someone to ask you to lead—take initiative.
• Memorable Quote:

  “You don’t get appointed to be the leader. You claim leadership through behavior.” (Leila, 10:42)

Timestamps:

• [10:30] Stepping up vs. waiting for permission
• [12:35] Leaders create certainty

4. Stop Avoiding Hard Conversations

• Problem: Evading uncomfortable but necessary discussions erodes both self-respect and respect from others.
• Leila’s Perspective:
  • People mentally tally each instance you avoid confrontation; avoidance kills respect.
  • Shared a personal example confronting a friend’s double standards, which ultimately increased her self-respect.
• Key Concept:
  • Executive presence requires being the “truth teller”—even when it’s uncomfortable.
  • Avoiding the truth creates confusion; confronting issues honestly builds trust.
• Memorable Quotes:

  “People won’t say it out loud, but they are counting every single time that you avoid doing the hard thing.” (Leila, 14:44)
  “Great leaders don’t avoid discomfort. They walk towards it.” (Leila, 18:54)

• Solution:
  • Replace avoidance with honest, composed confrontation.
  • Be honest, clear, and direct when facing challenges within your team or relationships.

Timestamps:

• [14:38] The hidden costs of avoidance
• [16:55] Confronting with composure
• [18:30] The value of being a truth-teller

5. Stop Being Inconsistent

• Problem: Mood-driven leadership undermines psychological safety. Inconsistent leaders lose trust and credibility.
• Leila’s Story:
  • Former boss’s unpredictable moods made employees anxious and reduced their respect for him.
• Key Insight:
  • Emotional regulation, especially during stress, is a rare and highly valued trait.
• Solution:
  • Replace inconsistency with emotional predictability.
  • Consistency and emotional regulation create a safe, productive environment.
• Memorable Quotes:

  “You cannot be trusted to lead others if you can’t regulate yourself. If your mood dictates how you lead, you are not leading. You’re just reacting to your own emotions.” (Leila, 20:06)
  “Consistency creates psychological safety, and people perform better when they know what to expect from you.” (Leila, 22:35)

Timestamps:

• [20:01] The dangers of inconsistent leadership
• [21:50] Why emotional regulation matters

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “It’s much more about what you stop doing that’s making you not have executive presence than it is about what you start doing.” (Leila, 24:16)
• “Executive presence is not about being charismatic. It’s about being somebody that people trust to lead.” (Leila, 23:26)
• Warren Buffett: “The one easy way to become worth 50% more... is literally just to hone in on your communication skills.” (Referenced at 04:14)

Final Takeaways

• Executive presence isn’t about flashy charisma, but about trustworthiness, consistency, and clarity.
• Start by eliminating weak behaviors—over-explaining, fidgeting, deferring, avoiding tough talks, and inconsistency—and replace them with concise communication, strong body language, decisive leadership, honest confrontation, and emotional stability.
• The five behaviors to cut out are subtle but transformative for growing as a leader people naturally trust and follow.

Related Content

Want to dig deeper?
Check out Leila’s suggested video: “How Kind Leaders Succeed When Nice Bosses Fail.”