Call It A Cliffhanger

Summary

Podcast Summary: Call It What It Is – Episode: Call It A Cliffhanger

Host Information:

• Title: Call It What It Is
• Hosts: Jessica Capshaw and Camilla Luddington (iHeartPodcasts)
• Description: Best friends and Grey’s Anatomy stars, Jessica Capshaw and Camilla Luddington, navigate life’s ups and downs, offering support, advice, and engaging discussions. They delve into personal experiences, share insights, and occasionally feature special guests to provide diverse perspectives.

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Introduction to the Episode

Release Date: July 14, 2025
Episode Title: Call It A Cliffhanger

In this emotionally charged episode, Jessica Capshaw and Camilla Luddington delve deep into the tumultuous finale of Grey’s Anatomy Season 8, specifically focusing on Episode 24, which is renowned among fans for its dramatic plane crash storyline.

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Emotional Impact and Personal Reactions

[02:53] Jessica Capshaw:
"Well, hello, hello, hello, hello, Call it crew, and welcome to the most depressing episode of Call it what It Is."

From the outset, both hosts express their apprehension about revisiting a particularly somber episode. Camilla shares her initial excitement, only to be overwhelmed by the episode's emotional weight:

[03:37] Jessica Capshaw:
"I was horrified. I thought I would watch it over coffee this morning. I was like, oh, great, Cool. Why would I can do that? Just the worst way to set up my day."

[04:23] Camilla Luddington:
"This episode was really, really sad. It was really sad. I found the whole thing very depressing."

Their candid reflections highlight the profound emotional toll the episode took on them, emphasizing its impact beyond the screen.

---

Filming Challenges and On-Location Shoot

The hosts transition to discussing the logistical and emotional challenges of filming such an intense episode, especially on location:

[08:09] Jessica Capshaw:
"Let's talk about actually, like, filming location, getting up there. Do I remember you telling me you guys filmed a Big Bear? Is that where you went?"

Camilla recounts the difficulties of filming in Big Bear, away from their usual Los Angeles setting, while dealing with personal challenges like her pregnancy:

[09:18] Jessica Capshaw:
"So I realized it was your horrible screaming kind of quickly. And then I went into actor mode and I'm like, how long did you actually have to scream for?"

[10:17] Camilla Luddington:
"I had to scream for so long. And I was very pregnant... I was covering in blood. It was exhausting physically."

The discussion underscores the physical and emotional demands placed on the cast and crew during the shoot.

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Key Scenes and Performances

Screaming Scene:

One of the standout moments discussed is Camilla’s portrayal of a character in distress, which required extended periods of intense screaming:

[09:18] Camilla Luddington:
"It was just the most annoying, incessant, repetitive screaming and it was high pitched and all these things."

Emotional Farewells:

Jessica and Camilla reflect on heartbreaking scenes involving major character departures:

[25:00] Jessica Capshaw:
"This is gonna sound really bad. I needed it to be over because I knew it was coming.... I love yous and I'm dying and hold my hand."

[25:34] Camilla Luddington:
"I just wanted to be done. This is torture."

These moments are lauded for their emotional depth and the actors' compelling performances.

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Character Developments

The episode’s focus on character arcs, particularly the departures and struggles of beloved characters, is a central theme:

[22:23] Jessica Capshaw:
"She uses a mask, and you're only seeing her eyes. And that's how you know someone's like just a fantastic actor."

[26:34] Camilla Luddington:
"I did really appreciate, on Arizona's behalf, I did appreciate when Karev is so mad at her and is like, whatever, fuck her... but it's actually very loving what he's saying."

The hosts dissect character motivations and relationships, providing fans with nuanced insights into the narrative developments.

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Production Insights and Crew Appreciation

Acknowledging the hard work behind the scenes, Jessica and Camilla extend their gratitude to the crew:

[57:25] Camilla Luddington:
"Every department had to work 95 times harder. Everyone, from crafty to camera to sound to props to all of it."

[57:36] Jessica Capshaw:
"There's no way for you to be like, oh, my God. I just loved that week. It was like, really fun. Like, nobody's that way."

Their appreciation highlights the collaborative effort required to bring such an intense episode to life, especially under challenging conditions.

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Conclusion

As the episode wraps up, Jessica and Camilla reflect on the lasting impact of the Season 8 finale and its place in Grey’s Anatomy lore:

[56:15] Jessica Capshaw:
"Not your favorite episode, but very necessary episode. Really appreciated all the high level storytelling and performances, but it's just, you know, an overall grade of sadness."

[61:58] Jessica Capshaw:
"I'm glad we did it. Usually when I always say it's the end of the episode, I'm a little bit sad. But today I'm a little bit happy. I'm gonna go lay down and cry for season eight, do you never see you never again."

Their heartfelt discussion underscores the episode's significance and the emotional journey it entailed for both the cast and the audience.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Jessica Capshaw at [02:53]:
  "Welcome to the most depressing episode of Call it what It Is."

• Camilla Luddington at [04:23]:
  "This episode was really, really sad. It was really sad."

• Camilla Luddington at [09:18]:
  "It was just the most annoying, incessant, repetitive screaming and it was high pitched and all these things."

• Jessica Capshaw at [22:23]:
  "She uses a mask, and you're only seeing her eyes. And that's how you know someone's like just a fantastic actor."

• Camilla Luddington at [57:25]:
  "Every department had to work 95 times harder."

---

Final Thoughts:

In "Call It A Cliffhanger," Jessica Capshaw and Camilla Luddington offer an unfiltered and deeply personal examination of one of Grey’s Anatomys most pivotal and emotionally draining episodes. Their blend of professional insight, personal anecdotes, and genuine emotion provides listeners with a comprehensive understanding of the episode's creation and its impact on both the cast and the audience. This episode serves as a testament to the resilience and dedication of the actors and crew behind the scenes, celebrating their ability to navigate and convey the complexities of tragic storytelling.

Transcript

[Jessica Capshaw]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

Call it what It Is with Jessica.

[Camilla Luddington]

Capshaw and Camille Ludington, an iHeartRadio podcast.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Well, hello, hello, hello, hello, Call it crew, and welcome to the most depressing episode of Call it what It Is.

[Camilla Luddington]

I'm already in a bad mood. And I saw that episode 24 of season eight, the season finale was, you know, in the top five of things that the crew wanted us to recap. I was so excited. I was. I was thrilled. I couldn't wait. I was like, oh, my gosh. That's right. So much happened in that episode. This is going to be so dramatic and, oh, it's gonna be so much fun to look back on that work and. And then. And then I watched it.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah. When was the last time you watched that episode?

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, while I was rewatching it, I was reminded that it turns out I never did.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, you've never seen it?

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, after watching it, I now know why I didn't watch it.

[Jessica Capshaw]

So I haven't seen it since I started the show. So this is like 13 years ago. And I had forgotten all the other parts of it and probably for a reason. For a reason. I was horrified. I thought I would watch it over coffee this morning. I was like, oh, great, Cool. Why would I can do that? Just the worst way to set up my day. Let's start with a table read.

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, again, flood of emotions. It was so depressing. It was like the saddest table read of all time. Because. Okay, so here. Sorry, in all seriousness, the thing that I'm going to say that is. Is maybe controversial, maybe not. Maybe just reporting from the front lines of my truth. This episode was really, really sad. It was really sad. I found the whole thing very depressing.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Well, there weren't a lot of LOLs.

[Camilla Luddington]

I didn't like it at all.

[Jessica Capshaw]

No, I don't like it either.

[Camilla Luddington]

I didn't like this episode. I don't need to watch it again.

[Jessica Capshaw]

No, I never want to see this episode again.

[Camilla Luddington]

Was the first and last day that I saw episode 24 of season eight. Okay, let's start at the table read. Even though you know your. Your television shows, your favorites or the ones you watch seem like it's just a foregone conclusion that those characters are going to come back every season. They. We are, as actors, contract players, which means that our contract is for that season. So every season that's a new season, we actually have to get rehired on some level. So when you finish a season, no promises, no guarantees that you're coming back, you're the last episode of any given season really could be your last in this particular case. Again, we will check Jessica's facts. My memory was that there were a lot of people up for contract renegotiations, which wasn't just getting. Wasn't just you were getting picked up, but you were actually renegotiating the price that you get paid per episode in this year. It's my memory that the people that were sort of hearing the script for the first time at the table read, but also understanding that they may not come back the next year.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

Were myself Eric Dane. It's my memory that Lexi knew Kyler knew she was leaving.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I'm not in this episode, so I'm really, truly watching it as a fan.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Did you know that she was going to.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, you did? Okay. Okay.

[Camilla Luddington]

And it was super sad. And also sneak attack. That actually made me really, even more sad. And she absolutely crushed the episode. And I was weeping. Kim.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Kim.

[Camilla Luddington]

I mean, Kim.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I mean, we have.

[Camilla Luddington]

So I was a puddle. Okay. So the episode table read was. It was heavy. It was a heavy table read. It was a. It was full of, like, uncertainty in terms of could. Was this your last table read? And then I do believe, again, I. I completely cross memories here, but I do believe that Kim did know that it was her last. Little did she know she'd come back. Right. So she thought she was leaving. And. Yeah, it was just heavy. Heavy.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Were you guys allowed access to the script before the table read?

[Camilla Luddington]

No. I mean, you got to take, you know, you get to table read time, and there'd be lunch out, and your scripts would usually be sitting at. You grab a script or it would be sitting in your little spot. And so I think a lot of people would kind of like, sneaky sneak. They'd like, you know, look.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

But honestly, there's not usually that much time. You're certainly not going to read the whole thing.

[Jessica Capshaw]

No. Now we get access to scripts ahead of time. But back then, we. We were reading them is sometimes for the very first. Oftentimes for the first time in the table read.

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, my God. Okay.

[Camilla Luddington]

So that was the table read. Those were table read vibes.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Let's talk about actually, like, filming location, getting up there. Do I remember you telling me you guys filmed a Big Bear? Is that where you went?

[Camilla Luddington]

So we also were not filming on our stages. We were filming in Big Bear. Well, okay. So again, I was watching it. For the first time, I forgot that there was this flip flop. So you start the episode and you're kind of like, where am I? Right? You're like, yeah, what are we on here? What are we watching? What's happening? And you're having this flashback of Weber talking to the intern about, you know, and you're seeing baby. All of them, right? Like baby gray, baby crab. Yeah, all these babies, all these baby surgeons. And you're like, wait, what's going on? And then it's juxtaposed to the wilderness and this horrible screaming. This horrible screaming. Who was doing that horrible screaming that was so high pitched and annoying and awful. That was me. I was doing the horrible screaming.

[Jessica Capshaw]

So I realized it was your horrible screaming kind of quickly. And then I went into actor mode and I'm like, how long did you actually have to scream for?

[Camilla Luddington]

I had to scream for so long. And I remember that it was. I again, I was. I am remembering that it was written that my screaming was meant to be horrible. It was meant to be. You could. You did not want to listen to it. It was so horrible. It was so repellent. It was like. It was. It was baked in the. Into the words, into the description that this was the kind of scream that was not like, it wasn't even. I'm feeling pain. It wasn't even. It was. It was just the most annoying, incessant, repetitive screaming and it was high pitched and all these things. Add to that. I was very pregnant. I know.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I'm thinking about this for you. First off, screaming for that long acting is so exhausting physically. And so I, I literally was like, damn, how long was she screaming for? Because there were a lot of cuts in those opening scenes. And then, you know, Sandra's like, Christina's.

[Camilla Luddington]

So good in that. Christina's so good. So, yeah, no, I'm doing a lot of. I know and I have a lot of. I have a lot of thoughts about. I mean, I don't even know how to stay on track here and telling the story.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I think that we organically, like, have it go where it takes you. I don't, you know, like, I think that we. It's a messy episode, so let's be messy.

[Camilla Luddington]

So we know that. We know that it's. We know that. We know that some people are not going to make it out of this episode alive, literally. We know that some actors aren't going to make it back to the show, literally. And that's where we start this episode. And we know we're filming on location, which we never do. So there's a lot of, you know, there's a lot of different things that we just don't normally do. It's not part of our usual programming, and we're all a little bit not stuck in our ways. We're just used to our normal programming, which is, you know, we. We live in Los Angeles, we work in Los Angeles. We. A lot of us have families. And so going on location meant leaving our families living in a hotel. And then also it was. It was the last episode of the season, which back in the day, which you don't even do anymore. I mean, nobody does anymore, is shoot 24 episodes. So you're at the end of your race, like, if you. If you've ever run a marathon, you're a mile 26, you got 0.2 to go. You are exhausted. Everything has been taken out of you. So we get this really big episode. I do feel that it's important to say something, and it is positive, so I'm going to jump in there with the positive. It's a beautifully written script. It's a beautifully written script, and it's a tough script. And for a show that I think gets a lot of attention for being obviously very emotional, but also having sort of these equal parts emotion, emotional and. And heartbreaking, but also heart. This was really, like, a very brave show to produce because it was. It took a lot out of everyone. But I do think it was really, well, you know, put together, especially because you have to go back and forth between the wilderness and the hospital, and the wilderness is genuinely. You're not watching, you know, people who you've just met a second ago in a life or death circumstance. You're watching, you know, series regulars that you. You're invested in their whole lives in life and death circumstances. And it wasn't. I was actually. It snuck up on me. I didn't realize that Lexi dies so quickly. I mean, no, she dies in the first, like, half hour.

[Jessica Capshaw]

No, she died because I stopped. Okay. So I was watching this morning. Matt came in, and he came in literally at that moment when she died. And I paused it, and it said 15 minutes. He's like, this is the first 15 minutes. And I was like, yes. We were also like, this is incredible writing because there's a whole other show still ha. That so much still to go. And they packed that horrible punch. 15 minutes in where you're already devastated.

[Camilla Luddington]

And then you're like, what?

[Jessica Capshaw]

Where is this going now? But I want to know how long you were Actually having to scream for, like, how long did that.

[Camilla Luddington]

And I was very. It wasn't just kind of pregnant. I was. I probably shooting that in the beginning of May, and I had Poppy in June. So I was a good, you know, seven and a half, eight months pregnant. I was very pregnant, which is why I'm always covered in a jacket, too. But I'm screaming for. You know, I mean, I remember just we would Just. Every setup we did, I think that they would get like, a wild track of me just screaming. But so when. When you realize that we've had this plane crash, we then kind of like the show shows you that there's different sectors of plane crash, right? So there's. There's, you know, Christina and Meredith, and also. I'm just gonna say everyone acted their asses off in this episode.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Everyone was incredible. There's a lot of times when I watch the show and I'm like, so incredibly proud to be part of it. And after that episode, I was like, damn, Grey's Anatomy in the house.

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh, how about that first shot on Meredith's face? And she just lets you know everything without even knowing.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yes.

[Camilla Luddington]

And then Christina comes in, and then I'm screaming, then you. You don't know where. Then you realize you need to find people. And the people you need to find are Lexi and Derek. And then you hear that banging, and Lexi's grabbed the seatbelt and is clanging it against the side of the airplane that's broken off and landed on top of her. So then they find her. But then you also establish that I'm there, and I'm there with Jerry. Pilot Jerry.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know.

[Camilla Luddington]

I love Pilot Jerry and is a wonderful actor.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yes.

[Camilla Luddington]

I spent most of my time with him. And you watch Arizona go through this weird hysteria and hystericalness where she starts laughing, and you're like, why are you laughing? And. And then Christina is having to get her shoulder popped back in because now we've found Sloan. And Sloan, of course, is going to go over to where Lexi is. But then Meredith still hasn't found Derek. And then you find Derek, and then you see his mangled hand popping out from the wreckage. It's awful. Not. Not the surgeon of the surgeons. It's the worst.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Like, just save the hand. The head can go even, but not the hand. As a surgeon.

[Camilla Luddington]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

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[Camilla Luddington]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

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[Camilla Luddington]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

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[Camilla Luddington]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

Let's talk about. Because it's a really gruesome episode. Okay. Let's talk about your leg. Dude, that reveal is. Is fantastic. What exactly are we seeing there?

[Camilla Luddington]

We're seeing like some flank steak is what you're seeing. You're seeing like some flank steak that was covering some. Very well made and artistically produced and then overseen by our most divine Linda Klein bone. And then they dressed the bone with. In my memory steak. It was like different pieces of steak. And then we had the. The blood. And then. Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, my God.

[Camilla Luddington]

And then I pick up my leg and move it now. Yeah, because it was. Yeah, it was broken. But then you hear her trying to be a doctor for Jerry. I know. Not a very good doctor. She basically just tells him to, like, not move too much.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Actually, let's talk about that really quick because I. That's something that I really think is so great that our show does, is where our doctors are doctoring on themselves or each other at the same time, which just happens throughout the whole episode. Right?

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And I just think it's such a fun element to write for in the chaos of everything.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I want to know really quick. Just like facts again. I know we're like skipping around. How many days were you up there filming? Do you remember? 300 million. It felt like a week.

[Camilla Luddington]

99 days. I think we were there. I think our whole crew. I Mean, I'm guessing that our whole crew was up there for some period of 10 days. I definitely remember. It's.

[Jessica Capshaw]

It 10 days.

[Camilla Luddington]

It felt like it, for sure. We were definitely there more than a week. Yeah, there was a weekend in there. Oh, wow.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Okay. Yeah, no, that's.

[Camilla Luddington]

I mean, really off topic. But I remember Big Bear is kind of a place that families go, and I think some couples go out there to have romantic whatever. Yeah. I remember my room had a really, really large Jacuzzi bathtub in the middle of it. And I remember being pregnant being, like, well in the middle of it. Oh, my God.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Like, you got the honeymoon suite.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, I got the honeymoon.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, my God, I love it so much. Okay. Okay.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

So at least you got to go back to the honeymoon suite, have your middle of the room Jacuzzi.

[Camilla Luddington]

It was so. Yeah, I thought it was interesting because, again, I. Well, I hadn't. I thought it was interesting because I hadn't watched episode 23, so I was really coming into it cold.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

But there was. And you're still working with him every day, and it's gonna seem like I pick on him. I don't mean to. It's just that Kevin is so serious. He just comes in with so much seriousness. He is the most serious doctor on that show.

[Jessica Capshaw]

He is very. But you know what it is, because I. I know.

[Camilla Luddington]

So he's like, extra serious.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I think it's the military edge, right?

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh, that's right.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yes. It's the. It's the military. It's woven into the character. Although I will say that like, in later seasons now he's. There's a lot of. There's more humor and funny moments for Owen Hunt. But back then. Oh, yeah. And especially this episode.

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh, my God. Chief. Kevin is just like.

[Jessica Capshaw]

He's Chief. And.

[Camilla Luddington]

But when we come back to the hospital, we are confronted with not just Kevin McKid. We are confronted with Chief Kevin McKidd. Yeah, he is now chief, which I had forgotten.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I hadn't watched the previous episodes. I'm just watching this episode, and I forgot where they are in their messy arc of a relationship. And I feel like I need to go back to remember, like, are they. Were they semi together at this? That. Were they on the. They're on the outs. Right, Right.

[Camilla Luddington]

So I agree. I also was like, where are we in this? But then when you watch the episode, you realize he's just lost Christina and Christina. Because, remember, he paused. He didn't. He didn't say it quick enough that he wanted to Be with her.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Right. Yes.

[Camilla Luddington]

He's lost her because she's going to go and do other things. And Teddy, meanwhile, has fallen in love with Scott Foley's character. So Teddy has lost the love of her life because he died in the.

[Jessica Capshaw]

OR that they're working in. Yes.

[Camilla Luddington]

And so they're now what. Their friendship is replete. And it is as really to go back to the fact that they started in the military. Comrades and best friends. And so that's why she feels like she can't leave him, is because he's already being left by the love of his life, and she's lost the love of her life. And so she needs to hold on to whatever piece of normalcy she can. And. And. Or, oh, sad fairy tale. Right. Which is that her husband is alive in the halls of this hospital, and when she leaves it, she will have lost every piece of him. It's so sad.

[Jessica Capshaw]

It is. And it is written so well. And I have to say, when I was watching the scene where she's explaining why she wants to stay, I was thinking, she's acting in just a mask, and you're only seeing her eyes. And that's how you know someone's like just a fantastic actor. Because I. Her eyes said it all. And I was like, damn, Kim, acting her butt off in this scene. Did you find the cuts back and forth, like, jarring a little bit?

[Camilla Luddington]

I was gonna say that. That's the thing, is that. So you leave the wilderness, you come into the hospital, you get Chief Hunt. You know, he means business. He's so serious. Now you're in the. You're in the residence lounge. And that. Jesse, I mean, he. He was right. I mean, I guess he has. He has reason to complain. He. He. How many times did his shirt come off on the show? Why was he always changing?

[Jessica Capshaw]

You know what? I don't know. He needed to change shirts many times a day, multiple.

[Camilla Luddington]

If the camera came around the corner, he should take off his shirt.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Evidently, he's gotta change it. Yeah, he's got to change the shirt.

[Camilla Luddington]

So he's taking off his shirt. Kevin is coming in. I was to talk about, like, where are we on the journey? I was like, where are they again? So I had to remind myself a little bit. But now we're back to the wilderness. And now Christina and Sloan are at or have found Lexi, and they're like, okay. I thought it was so crazy when Christina said, run it down for me, but she's talking about running it down for her for herself. Like, what's Wrong. You. You do the body scan.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. It's like the do the. The leaning into the fact that they're doctors and they can do that for themselves is just. It adds so much fire to, like, the episode.

[Camilla Luddington]

And then you see the characters at different parts of the. The wilderness journey, but you see all of them go through this stage of grief, which is bargaining. Right. So Sloan starts bargaining. He's like, I'm gonna. It's gonna be okay because I'm gonna. You're gonna live. You're not. Or sorry. And denial. He's like, you're gonna be fine. Everything's gonna be okay. You're not dying. And Lexi knows she's dying. Lexi's fully aware that she's dying.

[Jessica Capshaw]

God, I. I truly needed that. This is going to sound really bad. I needed it to be over because I knew it was coming. And the I love yous and I'm dying and hold my hand.

[Camilla Luddington]

I was like, I'm not holding your hand.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And he doesn't want to hold her hand. And then he ends up holding her. He tries to lift the. The plane off her again, and then he goes. And when he holds her hand again, I just, like. I could not stand it. I just wanted it to be done. I was like, this is torture.

[Camilla Luddington]

This was my note. It's my favorite Mark Sloan scene ever.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I would say. I would say so. I wonder how many times they had to do that. Sc. I know. You probably were.

[Camilla Luddington]

I was there.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, you were.

[Camilla Luddington]

Everybody was talking about it. Everybody was talking about how heartbreaking it was. It was very emotional when Kyler had her last take, like, the last word. The last take. And, you know, Eric was really crushing it and just doing, like, giving her everything. And she was giving him everything. And they were so. They really had gotten to the point where, I think in story land, we all really invested in them being the meant to be. Of course.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

And you also forget that. Well, you don't forget, but you're. You're running so many stories at the same time in your head is that while Meredith is so obsessed with finding Derek, which of course, is warranted, Christina, in coming back for supplies, sees Meredith, and because she's just seen Lexi, she's like, meredith, you need to come.

[Jessica Capshaw]

You need to come.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, you gotta come see Lexi because she knows she's dying. So then Meredith. And when she finds out after that commercial break and her wailing and weeping is, you know, A little bit like Arizona's wailing and weeping. It's just like. From her. It's a whole nother guttural.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, like, it's like that deep.

[Camilla Luddington]

It's.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I just. Yeah. That scene is so iconic. And then the fact that Meredith didn't. She arrives when she's already passed and she didn't get to say goodbye. And it's just.

[Camilla Luddington]

And we had to film. It's worth mentioning, we had to film the outside stuff and the wilderness stuff and the big bear stuff so much differently than we normally film our show because. And this is, I guess, technical, but in our. In our regular show, we, you know, our crew and all the. All the departments, every single one, from props to camera to sound, everybody knows our sets, and it's a real program. They know where all the things go. They know how to do the thing. And we were all in completely unfamiliar territory. So we were not laying down, you know, Dolly. We were not, you know, recording sound in the same way because we were competing with birds chirping and airplanes flying and sounds that we don't normally compete with. And so everything about it was so much more. My memory was, like. It was raw, and it was honestly, probably influenced by the storytelling. It was painful. It was, like, painful. It was kind of aggravating. The light would change, and then all of a sudden they'd have to add things, and then you'd have to wait and you were covered in blood. That was the other thing I was gonna say.

[Jessica Capshaw]

The blood people don't understand. Like, the blood's all sticky. You're probably in the dirt with the. Like, that fake blood is like glue. And it does get aggravating to have it on you.

[Camilla Luddington]

So this is the. This is the one funny story that I have from this episode. We. We shoot the episode, and in order to get the blood and stuff. And Arizona had quite a lot of stuff on her face. Yeah, you would. And in her hair. And you would have to get. Or the best way to get it out was shaving cream. So you'd get shaving cream and you'd just lather it up all over. And there was something about it that would remove that. The gooky stuff and so. And then a hot towel. So when we were shooting and you just go back to your hotel room at night, you know, you would take back your shaving cream and your hot towels, and you'd go home and you do it in your hotel room, and you didn't see anybody else. And it was done the last day we finished and we all got in our cars to go home. And I have said this before, and I think probably even more so in this case, you go a little. Especially after, like, highly emotional scenes or content. You kind of get numb when you get in your car and you kind of don't want to talk to anyone. You just kind of zone no. And big bears on a big mountain. And so I drive home. I'm so pregnant. I'm numb. We finished this long, hard shoot, and I'm driving, and I finally get down to the. We get to the freeway, and I'm driving on the freeway, and I hit a little bit of traffic. And I'm sitting in traffic, and I'm looking out the window, and I'm like, processing and everything else. And I look to my left because there's a car there.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And don't say, you got recognized.

[Camilla Luddington]

This woman turns, locks eyes with me, and her face registers what I look like, which is a. Like I'm in a horror movie. Like, I've got blood everywhere. I look like I've been completely. I mean, she did not know what to do. I mean, I couldn't hear her because she was in a car, but it was like she screamed. Slash said, like, do you need help, Slash? And there was nothing that I could actually say back that would be comforting to her, right? Like, besides rolling down my window, asking her to roll down hers, and stopping in the middle of a freeway to say, oh, no, no, don't worry. I'm on a TV show we just.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Filmed just in a plane crash. And it's.

[Camilla Luddington]

I'm totally fine.

[Jessica Capshaw]

My legs come off, but it's like, it's totally fine. That's really funny.

[Camilla Luddington]

So that woman is out there in the world somewhere today, and she has some story about. And it probably is sad, right? She probably imagines that I sad person. But I'm here to tell you that if you ever hear this, it was not sad. It was just me coming home from work.

[Jessica Capshaw]

God, I can't believe you drove home like that.

[Camilla Luddington]

Anyways, okay, so we go back to the hospital. Kim is crushing it. She's doing all that she's doing. I love the scene that comes when we come back to the world with the woods again with Christina and Meredith, where Christina's so over it. And she is like, I am over the guns to my head, and I'm over this, I'm over that. And as soon as I get home, I am getting the hell away from Seattle Grace Mercy Death. I'm out of here.

[Jessica Capshaw]

That was brilliant. I Also, I. We didn't talk about this, but I loved at the beginning. God, Sandra's is so good in everything. I loved at the beginning how she was obsessed with her shoe.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, where's my shoe?

[Jessica Capshaw]

Where's my shoe? I loved that. That was, like, part of her chaos.

[Camilla Luddington]

Makes sense to me in a weird way, like, when you can't control anything.

[Jessica Capshaw]

No, it does. It totally does.

[Camilla Luddington]

So silly.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I thought it was fantastic writing.

[Camilla Luddington]

And then I also love when she said the whole thing about when she's like. Because Meredith still looking at her like she's her person, and she's gonna have some, you know, some sage answer to things or figure it out, and she's like, I, I, I, I, I. I have ptsd, and I'm not reliable.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

But she's still in the trauma. Like, she's saying, I have ptsd, but she's actually in the TS part. There's no trd.

[Jessica Capshaw]

There's so much. I know. There's so many elements to, like, so many people's journey in this episode.

[Camilla Luddington]

It really.

[Jessica Capshaw]

By the way, I think the whole episode's, like, 42 minutes, and it's unreal what you guys pack into that. I do. I. I found it super jarring the back and for. Between the hospital and the airplane. And I think that it works, though, because you're never with you guys long enough to sort of get comfortable in. In. In your chaos and trauma. You're thrown back into the hospital. So by the time you're back with you guys, it feels like a slap in the face.

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, yeah, because you go from. You go from them using a safety pin to close Derek's wound to Weber in the OR being like, you kids jazzed about dinner.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, okay.

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, let's.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Let's talk about that, because I was a resident. I don't remember ever having a duck dinner.

[Camilla Luddington]

You didn't get a duck dinner.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I didn't. Yeah. I'm wondering where my steak dinner was.

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, maybe Kareem talked you out of it, because his next line was, also, I'll give you ten bucks to stab me in the face right now.

[Jessica Capshaw]

This is true. Maybe. Maybe Joe was told to stay home and order takeout. This is totally possible. Let's talk about Kepner and Avery.

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh, gosh. I mean, which part? Well, let's not.

[Jessica Capshaw]

First off, I feel like I really miss their chemistry on the show. I really.

[Camilla Luddington]

I. I miss, like, they looked like babies.

[Jessica Capshaw]

They did look like little babies. I miss their chemistry on the show.

[Camilla Luddington]

What season are you in right now?

[Jessica Capshaw]

500.

[Camilla Luddington]

No, but really 20.

[Jessica Capshaw]

We're about to go into 22.

[Camilla Luddington]

Okay, so that was season eight. It was a very long time ago.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah. That is a very long.

[Camilla Luddington]

14 years ago.

[Jessica Capshaw]

14. Yeah, yeah. No, it was a really long time ago. Can we talk about their. I was wondering where they were in their relationship, and I got, like. When she started talking about being happy, and then they'd had sex and the whole virgin thing. Forgot about that.

[Camilla Luddington]

And she really liked having sex with him, but she wasn't happy. She wasn't a virgin anymore, and she.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Didn'T know who she was. I, you know some of these things.

[Camilla Luddington]

And she failed her board, so now she wasn't even like the doc. She wasn't. I know. She wasn't a virgin.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I thought. I just thought it was. I thought Sarah did such a good job of. Of that.

[Camilla Luddington]

Always does such a good job. They super look like babies.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know, I know. Anyway. Okay, okay, let's go back to the horror show.

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, you know, and right before you go into that scene, which is so tender and sweet and honest, and both of them, I mean, Jesse and Sarah were always really good at being honest with each other in their storytelling. Like, they both showed up, they were very. It was simple and it was clear, and it was honest. And so. And you lean into that as a viewer, you're like, yes, tell me more. Because they had super high arching storylines, right? I mean, she's saying things like, I'm not a virgin anymore and you're my best friend. And they're big things she's talking about, but she's making them so simple and so relatable that you. And he's really listening, and it's, you know, it's so great.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I do have to say also when you. One second on that note, that when you come onto the show with your intern class, there is a bond that happens with that intern class if those actors are able to sort of stay around long enough with you, because sometimes, you know, on Grays, you know, we have an intern has to leave, and this happens to the other intern. And I think that for Sarah and Jesse coming on at the same time as that class, like, they would just bond in a way that you do see in other classes, too. But that chemistry just sticks around with you, regardless of, like, romantic chemistry, like the intern chemistry sticks around with you. And I was just reminded of that.

[Camilla Luddington]

Watching it right before you go to that scene I have in my notes, as I was watching, I also saw or noticed that Arizona was Kind of on her own with Jerry.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Like, yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

She was not part of the Meredith Christina, Derek, and she wasn't part of the Lexi Sloan. I mean, we tie her back in at the end with Sloane, but she really was kind of on her own. And I felt so bad for her. I felt so bad for her, just like, with that. And, you know, nobody. It wasn't wrong that they weren't, you know, ministering to her. They were all bleeding out. Right. But really, you didn't know how bad it was for her. You know, you see her coughing up a little blood. You see the bone, but you're not. You're not really understanding what's going on. And of course, now that we do know what ended up happening, I mean, listen, she. She gets to live, and that's a really huge thing. And she's in big trouble. I mean, she's in super duper, duper, duper big trouble.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Can I tell you my note on that?

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And you're gonna laugh.

[Camilla Luddington]

What?

[Jessica Capshaw]

It's pretty on brand because I'm a little slothy. And so I was watching. I was like, jessica got to sit the whole time. And I was like, I would have liked that. I like that you were sitting, especially pregnant. I'm like, wondering if they sort of did it on purpose. You couldn't have been climbing up and down the hills. And Big Bear, seven months pregnant. I'm like, I would have had a little pillow.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Under me.

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh, gosh. They had this. Okay. So we would shoot down in this one spot. There was. We shot at the bottom of this hill. It was kind of like a ravine where it was a little flat where the plane was that Jerry and I were sitting at. And of course, I'm seven and a half, eight months pregnant. Nobody wants me walking up and down that. But the only way to get around that was to get on this thing called the gator that was kind of like a souped up golf cart. Like a golf cart that could go at an incline and had, you know, rugged tread onto the wheels. And so, you know, I mean, the first couple times, I was like, that's kind that they're, you know, trying to help me out with this gator.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

That gear almost put me into labor. I mean, it was like, no, that is so stressful.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I'd rather them, like, hoist me up, you know, when they, like, rescue a horse, you know, you know, the horse video. I said, they rescue a horse with a helicopter. I would rather be pregnant, just rescued, like, a horse up and down. I Don't need the gator.

[Camilla Luddington]

Just slide down a sling. I will hold on to it.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yes.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yes. Yeah. So finally. I mean, truly, I don't know that I took more than two rides on this gator. And I said, no more gator for me.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And then you're like, my cervix is open.

[Camilla Luddington]

Walk it. And I was like, I guess I am.

[Jessica Capshaw]

You're like, I dilated on it.

[Camilla Luddington]

Well, also, I couldn't go into labor and big bear. I mean, I could, but I wasn't. You know, I wasn't.

[Jessica Capshaw]

You couldn't go into labor and big bear on a mountain, but it takes.

[Camilla Luddington]

Like, I don't know how long to get off the mountain. It was. You know, I was a little stressed. I was a little stressed, and I was losing my job. No.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And this is so stressful. You know what's funny is I was watching this thinking about the fact that, like, you know, you didn't. That you didn't know if you were going to come back the next season. So therefore, when you're acting, I'm. I'm thinking, oh, she knows that she's gonna lose her leg. You as an actress, like. And you didn't.

[Camilla Luddington]

I did not.

[Jessica Capshaw]

You did not know that that leg injury was going to be what it was.

[Camilla Luddington]

No, because I didn't know if I was gonna. If my character was. That was where she was gonna meet her end, was out there in the wilderness.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Talk about Cali.

[Camilla Luddington]

Jerry and I were just gonna be.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

Left out there. Oh, my gosh. I know. And Callie and all the Ben and Bailey stuff that's happening. But of course, by the way. And again, acting their asses off. Wonderful storyline. Hard to really focus on because you're worried about the people that are in the wilderness that might die.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Well, Cali's in such a good mood, and she's so happy, and she's got the sexy time planned. That every time she was like, like, I'm in law.

[Camilla Luddington]

I have laundry.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I was like, no, Cali, no. I'm like, yelling at the screen, don't do it.

[Camilla Luddington]

She does the whole thing where she foreshadows it, and she's like, it just takes one minute. I know one. Everything can change in your life on the. What did she say about something? What's that expression? With a dime.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, anything. I don't know. A dime.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, it was rough. Oh, golly. So she's waiting for everybody. She's waiting for. She's waiting for Arizona to come home, and she's gonna have this great oh, it's so bad. And then also, you know, Karev and Arizona's friendship, again, because I was thinking about the fact that it's not like she in the hospital system. She was never an island. Right. There was Callie, there was Karev, There was the whole ecosystem of the hospital. But if you put her next to the people who were there from the very beginning, like Christina and Meredith and Derek and Sloan, she's really not a part of that group. And so in the wilderness, she kind of was, you know, left with Jerry.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yes, you and Jerry. You and Jerry.

[Camilla Luddington]

And so I did really appreciate, on Arizona's behalf, I did appreciate when Karev is so mad at her and is like, whatever, fuck her. And Callie's like, well, she should be mad at you, and she's gonna be mad at you, and then she's gonna get over it. But then he goes in a very Carev way to leave her the message to say, like, I know you're mad at me, and I know that you think I fucked up, but, you know, you made me. And it was your belief in me that made me like I am, and I need to figure out if. If. If I'm something when you're not there. And I thought that was so just in the way that Karev does. Boils it down to, you know, could very well sound like an insult, but it's actually very loving what he's saying.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Coming from him. It's all love. I did. I did. There's a moment where, like, he's talking to Saw. He's talking to Cali, and he's like, I'm gonna call her. And he calls. And then he just. Like, I. I was watching, and I forgotten. And I was like, get through to her. Get through. Get through. And he just. In the background, you can see him. He's even, like, a little out of focus. Him hang up because he can't get through. And it's like all these little moments of potential hope where you're like, oh, they're gonna get rescued now, and this is gonna happen. And it's just. It all adds into the horror of it all.

[Camilla Luddington]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yep. So then I did also remark that I think we're, like, over the halfway mark. When Meredith remembers Zola. Did you hear the point where she's, like, halfway through the episode, she's. I mean, she's probably doing inventory of her life and what is at stake, and she all of a sudden says, zola. And again, because I'm not watching them in Sequence?

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

I was like, oh, they have a kid.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I was like, oh, and they have a kid.

[Camilla Luddington]

No, I mean, what is Arizona? But I mean, I just. It was, I was, I was brought back to all of, like, the, the. Just the domino effect and all the consequences that are going to, you know, come of if they're not found. Oh, and then the Mark in Arizona. It's not the first time that I've. Someone. I've tried to pray. Someone alive, by the way. This is something that I evidently do as an actor.

[Jessica Capshaw]

As a what?

[Camilla Luddington]

I've just had multiple times where I've prayed people back to life.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Who did you pray back to life in the show?

[Camilla Luddington]

I mean, I don't know. I just know that I didn't know.

[Jessica Capshaw]

In the episode. Did you pray someone back to Mark?

[Camilla Luddington]

Mark. Mark.

[Jessica Capshaw]

He's going, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

Like, I'm going to meet Lexi. I'm gonna go. And, yeah. Arizona's like, no, you're not. No, you're not. No. He says, lexi's waiting for me. And she's like, no, no, no. Sophia's waiting for you, and Callie's waiting for you. And, you know, they have a very rocky relationship, those two. And so it's kind of a big deal. I remember was a big deal for her to say, like, I'm waiting for you. And then I was a little disoriented because I couldn't figure out if it looked like he was laying on her lap. And I was like, is it.

[Jessica Capshaw]

No, I didn't. No, he's laying on the leg. He's laying on the leg. No, I didn't think he was laying on the lap. I, I. When you said an I'm waiting for you to. It was. It's hard to describe, honestly, like, the feeling of it, because it just, it, it. It's so. All of it is so emotional.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And that line was like, oh, another stab right in the heart.

[Camilla Luddington]

I know. And then you go back to the hospital where, again, Chief Hunt is just really cranky and grumpy, but also realizing that he has to do this thing because now, now she's admitted to him that she's staying for him. And he, of course, realizes she can't stay for him, so then he fires her. And he's all grumpy and mean and fiery, and she's like, are you kidding me?

[Jessica Capshaw]

Like, that scene was so good.

[Camilla Luddington]

Absolutely.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I will say, it's hard to compete with those scenes where you guys are. And that was the scene that stood out to me. That I was like, oh, that, like, that can compete with these scenes because those scenes were so crazy. Was so amazing. And she says, son of a bitch. And she walks out. And then she comes back. And it was so.

[Camilla Luddington]

When she comes back, she makes me cry so hard because you can see on her face, by the way, don't forget, in real life, she. She knew she wasn't coming back.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know that's hard.

[Camilla Luddington]

But when she comes to the door and you see when she comes back, I felt from her, it was so clear on her face that she was grateful, relieved, sad. She. There were so many things going through her character's mind that was like. And then he hugs her because he knows.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I think it's one of my favorite Kim scenes, actually. Like, I'd forgotten about that scene.

[Camilla Luddington]

She's amazing in this episode. She's amazing.

[Jessica Capshaw]

She's amazing.

[Camilla Luddington]

But.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, oh, we should talk about too. Because at first I was like, whoa, wait, what? What's this cut? They're going back and forth between the hospital and doing it on him. So you can see, like, how it should be done. And then that was really cool, that first cut away. I was like, that's a weird cut. Like, why are we cutting like that? And then I was like, oh, we're going back and forth. Genius. Genius.

[Camilla Luddington]

Super cool. Super, super cool. Yeah. And then I sat there. So the episode kind of honestly doesn't end with some huge bang. It sort of ends and there's no resolve. There's no again, remember, go back to the table read where no one knows what's going to happen. We were all like. And now, like, no one had any clues. And I. I do remember being told that the writers were deliberately leaving the finale so that should. They need to wrap it up and say that any one of the people in the wilderness that they could. And so you leave them at this, like, campfire and you have the voiceover and all that.

[Jessica Capshaw]

How much do you remember? Did it, like, really take you back if you haven't seen it ever? Did it really? Were you like, oh, my God.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, yeah. All of it. All of it. I remember all the face where all the. Yeah. Where all the blood was. Where with the jackets. I remember the set. I remember they'd have to put these things on the ground that would be constantly smoking.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Why?

[Camilla Luddington]

Because the plane had just crashed.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Oh, oh, oh, I understand. I was like, wait, what? Oh, yeah. Do you remember seeing the set for the first time, like the airplane pieces and being like, oh, my God, it's really happening. Sometimes when you get to see it in real life, you're like, it was really.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, it was very. It was also very hard because again, I say again so much. Please cut out all my agains. I remember it personally being a very challenging time because there I was so happy and pregnant and excited and about to have a third baby at the same time that I knew that my job might be changing and that I was playing in my set of imaginary circumstances, such deep grief and fear and hysteria. And I do also remember having a moment where I felt really, it was Poppy. I was pregnant with Poppy. I felt. I don't know. Insert the right word. I'm not sure. I felt guilty. I felt worried, I felt thoughtful. I felt mindful of what all of that emotion was doing to the little baby.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I was thinking like this screaming even, like, I would give me heebie jeebies. Pregnant.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah. There was no good way to make that all happen. You know, that was. That was just tough stuff. I then. Anyway, so I. So we finished. I finished the episode, and then I sat there and. You know how you're TV just goes on to the next episode if you don't do anything. And episode nine, the first episode, the first character that you see is you.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Okay, so I have to talk about this because this is. It really made me laugh. Okay. Because I remember. And I said this to Matt because he saw the end of it with me and he was like, damn, such a good episode. And I said, I remember all those years ago coming on and being so excited for my first episode and, you know, all the intricate. And I. And I rem. Remember being almost confused why we weren't immediately embraced as a. An intern class. You know, we're new doctors. Like, why aren't you guys all immediately in love with us? And then I laughed to myself, and I thought, literally, there could not have been a more annoying probably entrance of a character than me just coming. Everyone's expecting to, like, come back and find out what happened with the plane crash. And here I am coming out of the elevator with my little books and stuff. Like, you don't want to be the character that comes on after the trauma of all these characters have been on the show for so long.

[Camilla Luddington]

Is this perhaps maybe a good segue into the tone that was on set right around Burger Gate?

[Jessica Capshaw]

I don't know.

[Camilla Luddington]

I mean, maybe just a little bit. Are we setting a little bit more context? Because now we've identified. Yes, that's right. I was. The baby that I had just had was Poppy and I'd almost died in a plane crash, and you took a picture of me eating a burger and you posted it. That's the important part.

[Jessica Capshaw]

This is true. Yeah. No, it would. It would be more annoying to have a, you know, a new actor on set that is like, hi, guys.

[Camilla Luddington]

That was. Hey, guys. Let's. Thanks. Let's thank Shonda for the burger truck.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Listen, to be honest. Let's be honest. We all needed that burger truck. You guys needed that burger truck. No one needed a burger more than Arizona Robbins.

[Camilla Luddington]

She just wanted to have her burger in peace.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I get it. I. I do get it. I'll give you. I'll give you some problems. Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

Have a minute to herself.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And instead, I was like, thanks for the burger truck.

[Camilla Luddington]

Clappy. No.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah. It is annoying. Now, in retrospect, I'm giving you a little bit of props right now. It is annoying.

[Camilla Luddington]

Here's what the overall note is that I. That I will. I will say this forever because it is true. And it's very easy to keep track of the truth. Every episode that I've ever done, I'm grateful for, and I know that it had a reason. And a season revisiting some of them is more enjoyable than others. And this particular episode, which I'm so happy that everyone really loves, because I do think it has incredible things in it, personally, was just a little bit more challenging. It was challenging to do, and it was challenging to rewatch.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I actually think it was genius, though, to not reveal in the premiere episode what had happened and to have everybody really wait until episode two of season nine because you get to introduce all these new characters. Whether you like us or not, you know, we're going to be there. But in episode two, it was such. It was so shocking to go back and see what had happened because we really didn't know the fate of anybody and how it had all ended until that episode. Yeah.

[Camilla Luddington]

But again, it was so. It was so hard that I remember. I mean, I hate to make this, like, such a downer.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Well, it's not an upper episode, is it? It's a downer.

[Camilla Luddington]

I remember being like when. When we came back, and then. Because Sloan didn't die in the woods.

[Jessica Capshaw]

He died in two.

[Camilla Luddington]

So, yeah, Sloan came back to then film his last scene, and it was like, that's sad. It's all sad. It's all sad, you know?

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, we do sad. We. We do sad. Really well.

[Camilla Luddington]

Arizona lost her leg.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know.

[Camilla Luddington]

Sorry. I did not. Let's not put that at the top of the List. We lost Lexi. We lost. Did we ever find out what happened to Jerry? Where's Jerry?

[Jessica Capshaw]

Did Jerry survive? Oh, my God. We need to. So maybe you need to know. I don't even want to. I think I'm just gonna personally watch episode two because I need to. I need to remember what happened. But this is kind of amazing. Think about this. That was the season finale of eight, and then the season finale of nine was the cheating. I mean, these are fantastic back to back season finales.

[Camilla Luddington]

I know, I know, I know. And it's so funny. It'll be for another. I'll tell the story another time. But remind me to tell you what. Whenever Shonda would call me with really great storylines that she was cooking up, I would always have the same response. I'll tell you what it is. I'm not telling you.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Okay, okay. We gotta know that.

[Camilla Luddington]

I'll tell you all. I'll tell you all what I used to say.

[Jessica Capshaw]

So not your.

[Camilla Luddington]

Not your favorite episode, but very necessary episode. Really appreciated all the high level storytelling and performances, but it's just, you know, an overall grade of sadness.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, no, it's. It. I. I was. I was not looking forward to watching it. I was sad that that was my homework. I didn't want to be taken back there.

[Camilla Luddington]

What does it say about all of you that this is in your top five that you wanted to hear from us about?

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know, because it is.

[Camilla Luddington]

It.

[Jessica Capshaw]

It is a brilliant episode. It's brilliant. And the. I. Yeah, it's. And everyone's fantastic. And I think we have to do a shout out to the crew too, because I'm sure nobody worked harder in those circumstances than that crew that are there from the beginning to the end of the day, every single day out there in the mountains making that happen.

[Camilla Luddington]

Every department had to work 95 times harder. Everyone, from crafty to camera to sound to props to all of it.

[Jessica Capshaw]

This is what we want to hear. We want to hear. There's no way for you to be like, oh, my God. I just loved that week. It was like, really fun. Like, nobody's that way. You would sound psychotic. I would expect you to hate filming that week. It's. You're putting yourself through trauma and the storylines are not nice.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah. Yeah. And you know what? I also remember there was a real feeling when we came back for season nine, because clearly we know the end of that story. I did get my contract, did get renewed. When I came back for season nine, I felt pretty strongly that there were. There was a real division between those who were in the woods and those who were not. I mean, I'm not kidding. Yeah, really. I mean, and, you know, we didn't. We didn't. We weren't there for, you know, the blood, sweat, and tears that Kim gave or that Chandra gave in those scenes. Like, we weren't there for that. So we didn't see it. But no matter what they did on some level, again, it was sort of normal programming. It was what we were used to doing. And what we did in the woods was so different and so just deeply challenging that I think there was a real. Like, we would refer to it. There would be. There would be times in season nine where, you know, whether it was Ellen and I or, you know, Sandra and I, but we'd refer back to it. It would be.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, remember the woods?

[Camilla Luddington]

We would recall. We would recall being in the woods.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah. It was like. It is like the season nine finale when you're like, you weren't there.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah, you were. You weren't there.

[Jessica Capshaw]

It's like, I'm a new actor on the show. I'm so excited to be there.

[Camilla Luddington]

You weren't there. We turned into, like, the Jack Nicholson A Few Good Men moment. We're like, you. You. You can't wall.

[Jessica Capshaw]

You can't handle the woods.

[Camilla Luddington]

You can't handle the woods. You don't want to think about me being in the woods, but I have to be in the woods. All the story that just populated the entirety of season nine. I know.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And you're like, and.

[Camilla Luddington]

And.

[Jessica Capshaw]

And April and all those guys are at dinner.

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah. They're talking about their slow roasted duck.

[Jessica Capshaw]

They're slow roasted. I did, like, before we go, I have to say, I did like that Webber was like, I've got one. One piece of advice. And he's like, oh, wait, I'll wait.

[Camilla Luddington]

I'll wait.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I'll wait. I'm like, what was it gonna be?

[Camilla Luddington]

Whatever. Am I dense? Why was Karev at that dinner?

[Jessica Capshaw]

He must have been a resident. He must have still been a resident, in fact. That's why. Well, he must have been. Or because that's why they were waiting.

[Camilla Luddington]

Also, Kepner were not the same resident class as.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know, but they came in as transfers from another hospital, so they were.

[Camilla Luddington]

Supposed to all be the same age.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I know. And I never think of them that way either. I always think of the. The other crew as, like, further ahead.

[Camilla Luddington]

All right. The one for those of you on our crew that likes to get really forensic about things. I want an analysis.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yeah, we need to know.

[Camilla Luddington]

We know how it's possible that they're all in the same class and then their birthdays and their fictional ages.

[Jessica Capshaw]

Yes, we need to know. All right, my request to the crew is the next one that you guys vote for. Can we make it less traumatic for us to re watch?

[Camilla Luddington]

Yeah. Yeah. But I don't know if it gets to be the musical episode because that's a different kind of happening.

[Jessica Capshaw]

That's a different kind of trauma for you. A different kind of trauma for you.

[Camilla Luddington]

All right, so at the end of the day, I'm glad we did it.

[Jessica Capshaw]

I'm glad we did it. Usually when I always say it's the end of the episode, I'm a little bit sad. But today I'm a little bit happy. I'm gonna go lay down and cry for season eight, do you never see you never again. Let's call it the end of the episode.

[Ryan Seacrest]

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[Kevin McKidd]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

Every day has a to do list, but adding Enjoy Belvita to yours can help you knock out the rest of it. Belvita Breakfast Biscuits are a tasty and convenient breakfast option when paired with low fat yogurt and fruit that provide steady energy all morning while Belvita Energy Snack Bites give you the perfect mid morning refuel.

[Camilla Luddington]

Best part?

[Jessica Capshaw]

They both taste great so make the most out of your morning with a bite of Belvita. Pick up a pack of Belvita at your local store today.

[Kevin McKidd]

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[Jessica Capshaw]

This is an iHeart podcast.