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This episode of Call it what It Is is presented by BMW. Together we're celebrating Women's History Month and championing females in the US and around the globe.
Matt
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Matt
Hello, hello, hello, Collet crew, and welcome to another episode of Call It. Call it short and sweet. Now, last time my side piece was on the show, I promised you guys that he wouldn't be back. And yet here we are. Matt.
Camilla
He's back.
Matt
He's back. Just can't be with us here today. So I had to scrounge.
Camilla
You had to scrape from the bottom.
Matt
Bottom of the barrel.
Camilla
And you ended up with me and we ended up.
Matt
But you know what? This is kind of perfect because today, you guys, we're gonna dive straight in. We are talking about weddings. Wedding stress and anxiety. And this is real. So, Ashley, you are the perfect person to really. Because we can. We can dive into our own wedding. But I'm going to read some stuff first. Okay. This is from the New York Post. Proof that wedding planning is hell. Planning a wedding is so expensive and stressful that 6 in 10 couples married in the last year seriously considered eloping. We did, too.
Camilla
Yeah. Because it was so overwhelming. It's. At many points we were like, let's just consider this.
Matt
Also, my family are so annoying. Just silence her. He's being so diplomatic right now. His eye. His eyeballs are agreeing, but his mouth isn't moving. Matt. No, come on.
Camilla
I'm not gonna say that.
Matt
We were gonna elope to remember where. Hawaii.
Camilla
We were tell the story of why, though. Like after the whole first venue and.
Matt
Okay. Well, even before that. Okay. But that. This is true.
Camilla
Yeah.
Matt
So Matt and I, we. I had. I'd seen a picture of this place in, like, a magazine, and it was like a house in Malibu. And I thought instead of going to, like, a big hotel and spending all that money, maybe we just. Vrbo. Rent. Sort of Airbnb. Rent a house for a weekend that allows for a party. We make it really small.
Camilla
Have just very close friends and family. Have a big party.
Matt
Yes.
Camilla
On the beach.
Matt
And we found the place and we went to go see it and we. And it was like, unbelievable. It's so beautiful. Looked out on the Beach. I just wanted to see the water. And we got. We got it. We got a date in. And we sent out invites.
Camilla
Very. You know, we got. We got kind of far along.
Matt
Yeah. We started, like, planning, like, how the food was gonna go and how I was gonna walk down the aisle. Like, how I'd walk down that version of an aisle. And then.
Camilla
And we had worked on our synchronized dance for, like, months and months.
Matt
Yeah. Flying off the roof of it.
Camilla
Yeah. Gonna be. No, we. We had no synchronized dance.
Matt
Okay. But it burned down.
Camilla
Yep.
Matt
Which probably was an omen. When you think about it. You ever wonder.
Camilla
I don't think we ever saw that. As. Did we ever discuss once, like.
Matt
No, I'm saying it right now. It could be. It could have been a bad sign. Maybe.
Camilla
We'll see.
Matt
That took a downer.
Camilla
Yeah.
Matt
We weren't prepared for that. Okay.
Camilla
Right.
Matt
Anyway, Anyway, so. Yes, it burnt down in a horrible omen. And so then we decide. Then we considered eloping.
Camilla
Yeah.
Matt
And I was into it. Why? Why was I into it? What was my main reason?
Camilla
Because you were worried and stressed about your family.
Matt
Were any of my concerns realized?
Camilla
But that was the reason I didn't want to elope.
Matt
Yeah. Because of the entertainment, what the potential.
Camilla
Was and what could happen.
Matt
Well, let me just. Just so you guys understand, listening to this. Because I've never told this story before, my concerns were valid. My dad, somehow. We were at a beautiful resort. My dad somehow found some sort of weed situation. Right?
Camilla
Yep.
Matt
I didn't know. I don't know who he was talking to.
Camilla
He wasn't.
Matt
He was talking to everybody but people. Not even at the wedding. So somehow my dad from England, where weed is not legal, got real excited. In good old California, where weed is legal, he had a little puff. Puffs at some point in the wedding. And then I never saw him again. From like 10pm onwards, my dad had gone. But I wasn't worried because I was like, whatever. He's probably gone to bed. Okay, so at 10pm do you remember what happened?
Camilla
Your dad disappeared.
Matt
Yep. And where was he?
Camilla
No one knows. No one.
Matt
No one knows exactly what happened.
Camilla
He got a little too stoned and just walked away?
Matt
No. But he couldn't find his room.
Camilla
Couldn't find his room.
Matt
He.
Camilla
He wandered from room to room trying to find it for a while.
Matt
Hours. Hours is what was reported back to me. The next day, my dad went missing at the resort. We don't. We don't quite know. It's almost like an alien. There's a gap there's. A gap. Missing. Yeah.
Camilla
Missing timeline.
Matt
There's a missing timeline that not even he's really aware of, can't be accounted for. And he wondered. The resort not remembering where his room was for. For, as he put it, hours.
Camilla
Your dad had a great night.
Matt
I don't know. I mean, possibly. Possibly. Who knows?
Camilla
Well, they were also traveling, and there was a lot of, you know, there's a lot of moving parts. And.
Matt
And yes, it's tempting to do an elope. And here's.
Camilla
I still think if. If. Be honest. If we could do it again, I think we had the most beautiful wedding in the world, but I would consider eloping. Yeah. I think there's something romantic and sexy about it, too.
Matt
There is.
Camilla
Yeah.
Matt
And do you know what? It is, too, because I feel like you can elope and have, like, a honeymoon at the same time. Yeah.
Camilla
It feels a little more selfish.
Matt
Okay, we're gonna talk about the biggest anxiety. Did you know that wedding planning is more stressful for men? According to the Huffington Post. According to a survey, 23% of men said they found planning the big day to be the most stressful life event, while only 16% of women said the same. Why do you think it is an exclusive mat?
Camilla
That's a good question. Why is it more stressful for men?
Matt
Yeah. Why?
Camilla
I do think there's an expectation like.
Matt
That you show up.
Camilla
No. For the wedding itself. And I feel like if a wise man in a lot of these situations, the bride has an expectation of what the day will look like and the things involved, and it's to this level of perfection that as a partner.
Matt
Hang on, hang on. Wait, wait.
Camilla
You're worried that it's not gonna meet the you. It's not gonna be perfect. It's. And so that's what I'm hearing.
Matt
What I just interpreted. The girl has a lot of expectations, which is stressful.
Camilla
Oh.
Matt
For the men.
Camilla
Okay. Thanks for. Thanks for doing that to what I said.
Matt
Well, what are you saying?
Camilla
I'm saying in most cases, I think that expectation is being dictated by the bride. Is that. Can I say that?
Matt
Oh, God, I don't know.
Camilla
I'll say something else. I don't know.
Matt
No, no, no, no, no. That was what came out of your mouth, and you'll get canceled for it, and it's fine.
Camilla
But are we gonna have a talk later?
Matt
Probably. I mean, I was really trying to.
Camilla
Make sense of something.
Matt
What's interesting, though, is it's. It's. Do you not feel that? 23%? Because I think. Okay. So both partners want it to be perfect.
Camilla
Yes.
Matt
You're saying it's. And. But women are like, only 16% of women feel that way, that it's like the most stressful life event. But more men feel that way. And you're saying it's because they feel more pressure from the girls.
Camilla
No, I don't think it's pressure from the girls. I think as a partner, I just think as a partner as a whole, whether it's male or female, you want your part. You know, if your partner has plans for something, you. You want those plans to read the expectations of your partner. If one of the partners is more into it than the other, you're still both wanted to be like.
Matt
What I'm hearing now, though, is the women are more into a wedding than the men. That was not the case for us.
Camilla
Yeah. I actually had thoughts and opinions of things.
Matt
Hayden was at our wedding, too.
Camilla
Yeah, it was cool.
Matt
Yeah. She was 2. Do you remember what we gave her so that she would zip it during the ceremony?
Camilla
Yeah. At the time, she had a lot to say.
Matt
She had way too much to say.
Camilla
And way too many opinions.
Matt
Yeah.
Camilla
And we were just trying to figure out how to get through this ceremony.
Matt
Yeah.
Camilla
So we gave her the largest lollipop.
Matt
It was about the size of her.
Camilla
Head, and she just sat there licking it the whole time.
Matt
We said zip.
Camilla
I remember. I remember when we walked with her down the aisle afterwards, her hands were all sticky and blue, and it was cute.
Matt
And you walked down the aisle with her. That was really cute. I like that we did it a little bit different.
Camilla
Yeah. I liked her being a part of the day. It was very cool.
Matt
Me too. Okay, so we do have some call it crew submission. Are you ready for this? So we threw it out to them. We said, what is your experience? What are things that were stressful? What are moments? You had all the things. Eliana said we pretty much missed the whole reception because pictures took so long. Do you remember what we did with pictures for this exact.
Camilla
Didn't we do it at a certain time while other people were doing something so that it wasn't.
Matt
No. We were worried that we would miss that, like, hour, the cocktail hour. And we wanted to be, like, in the mix with everybody. And so we put, like, a very short time limit on it. I remember we were like, we only have 30 minutes.
Camilla
I do feel like at weddings, that period when you're waiting from the end of the wedding to when they're done with the pictures and making the entries.
Matt
Sometimes they go on Forever.
Camilla
Sometimes it can be like two hours.
Matt
No, it's insane.
Camilla
But, yeah, I thought we were pretty good with the time.
Matt
Yeah. I say put a little parameter on it if you can.
Camilla
Yeah. I feel like there's so much going on and there's so many people that you, you know, that are there. It feels like that always takes longer than it should.
Matt
Yeah. Okay. You read Hailey.
Camilla
Haley, although my wedding was perfect, I regret trying to please everyone.
Matt
Mm.
Camilla
We talked about this recently because I feel like the majority of the first half of our reception I was so worried about. Yeah. Making everyone happy and making sure Hayden was good and, you know, buddies I hadn't seen in a while and, you know, my family. You know, you're checking on people because you're technically hosting.
Matt
Yes.
Camilla
But I wish I wouldn't have focused so much on that.
Matt
Yeah.
Camilla
Because I feel like I didn't even see you for, like, the first half.
Matt
You didn't see me one. One minute.
Camilla
I was at a different wedding.
Matt
Did you know that? I was there.
Camilla
Foreign.
Matt
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Matt
Molly said, Grease stains on the bottom of my wedding dress from getting out of the car. Why do we have to wear white? It really doesn't help. Yeah, I think we can. You know what? No. But some people wear Like a blush or something. I agree. White was. White is very difficult and it is stressful. Like, you're kind of drinking your champagne, like, away from your body or like you can't feel like you can eat anything.
Camilla
Because again, I feel like all the elements are so worried about being perfect that it's hard to enjoy stuff in the moment.
Matt
Yeah.
Camilla
And the more you can kind of let go of that stuff, I think it's. It's easier.
Matt
This is why I feel like eloping would be good, though, because it's like, if you're eloping and you spill something on your dress, you might be a little more like. Well, it. Yeah, whatever. You know, it's the two of you. Like, you can edit it out of pictures. Like, who cares? Okay.
Camilla
Anonymous. Because my husband would kill me. My husband has such bad anxiety. He had diarrhea before the ceremony. I haven't read this yet, guys. I'm sorry. My husband had such bad anxiety. He had diarrhea before the ceremony and sharded at the altar. Oh.
Matt
Can I ask you a question?
Camilla
Yeah.
Matt
If they were like, this guy.
Camilla
Oh, my God.
Matt
Okay, so if they were like, Matt, do you take Camilla to be blah? And right at that moment, there was a shark.
Camilla
Mine or yours?
Matt
I don't know. Would you. Let's just say mine.
Camilla
Like, at the moment. Like, literally the idea.
Matt
I really can't do podcasts with you because it just gets.
Camilla
You proposed this question.
Matt
I know, but I'm regretting it. Like, it just takes a turn.
Camilla
So what's your question? You gotta finish it.
Matt
Okay. Would you have. Would there have been. Would you have taken a minute to think? Like, wait a second. I'm not sure about this now.
Camilla
Because you sharded. Because you sharded. I'm going to say this. Because you sharded at the altar.
Matt
You redden. You don't have to repeat it. But you.
Camilla
I just want to make sure I have that.
Matt
No, that is the. Seriously, I can't do this with you anymore.
Camilla
I mean, no, it wouldn't be a deal breaker. It would be really funny and quite endearing.
Matt
Would you like. It would have been endearing.
Camilla
Yeah.
Matt
Like, remember that moment that Camilla Chardon, like, you would have, like, said that as a. I don't know, baby. I don't know. This is, like, stressing me out. Honestly.
Camilla
You did not shart eye. So we're good.
Matt
Oh, I really. I'm seriously. I don't know if I can honestly do this with you.
Camilla
You said I can just sit here and be honest.
Matt
I know you. I know. But it's like I'm regretting it. Okay. Karine said I have wedding day stress without having a wedding myself again.
Camilla
I feel like the expectation is. Of the day itself is too much.
Matt
Consider eloping. Ask yourself the question, would you enjoy it? Would you be more present if maybe you were kind of selfish with it?
Camilla
Yeah. I think being present is a big thing because it's very hard to be present when there's so many.
Matt
You are. You do feel like you have to please everybody. And I do. I think both of us worry that everyone was having a good time.
Camilla
Yeah. And it's a destination and, you know, it's. You know, you want to make sure the pictures aren't taken long and, you know.
Matt
Well, it wasn't a parents are okay. And technically a destination, but it was a destination for other people.
Camilla
Yeah, exactly. So you have people that are traveling in.
Matt
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. I could have done without the speeches, too.
Camilla
I love the speeches.
Matt
What speech are you specifically talking?
Camilla
Just all of them.
Matt
No, you know which one I'm talking about.
Camilla
That's why you.
Matt
My dad did a speech, you guys. He had done an absolutely disastrous speech at my brother's wedding. My older brother, when he got married, he had started his speech with Daniel, met the love of his life eight years ago today. Unfortunately, she can't be here today. Oh, okay. So it was like that, and it went downhill from there. So I. So I said to you, my dad absolutely cannot do a speech at my wedding. It's not going to happen. And you were like, he's your dad.
Camilla
Let him do a speech.
Matt
Yes. Matt feels very sympathetic towards my dad. So he was like, you have to give him something. And so I said, fine. He could have the welcome speech. And he can literally stand up and he can say, hi, everyone. Welcome to the wedding, and he can sit back down. And that was going to be the parameters of his. Of his.
Camilla
Yes.
Matt
Okay. That's not what happened, was it? No, no. He got up, he sang can you feel the love tonight. Then he pretended to get a phone call from Snoop Dogg congratulating us, which was completely random and so ridiculous. And he literally pulled out his phone and pretended he was on the phone with Nipah. Nobody knew what was going on. It was absolutely terrible.
Camilla
I would not take it back at all.
Matt
Are you joking?
Camilla
If we eloped, I would still invite your dad to do that speech, and I would ask him to do that exact speech. It's one of the few things I would honestly not do.
Matt
I was dying. Honestly, I would have rather someone sharded. I would have regretted someone sharding on the day than my dad's speech. Anyway, I'm just saying maybe consider a loping. Okay. You read poppy.
Camilla
Poppy. I'm 18 and single, but I stress about wedding. Oh, about my wedding a lot. What if I get my period on the day?
Matt
I think a lot of girls stress about this because we're wearing white. And I think that if you know your cycle really well, maybe take it into consideration when you're planning the wedding. I never thought about that. I'm thinking about that. Poppy's making me think about it right now. If you are timing out your cycle and it's pretty consistent, like you definitely sort of kind of know like a, a period of time where you're maybe good to go.
Camilla
But what if the only available date.
Matt
For the wedding day is day one of your period?
Camilla
Literally right at the beginning? What do you do?
Matt
Listen, you need reinforcements. You wear the pad and you wear the tampon and you, you figure it out. You can't let it be something you think about on the day. Okay. Keke, we had a guest ask if they could bring their girlfriend three hours before the wedding. Absolutely not.
Camilla
Yeah, that seems excessive.
Matt
No, that seems crazy. Okay, now you read.
Camilla
And Ayla, when I was seven, I was the flower girl at my aunt's wedding and I passed out from my nerves. Oh, oh, at seven.
Matt
Oh, that's Hayden's age. Yeah, it is nerve wracking, I have to say. She was so young. I don't think she realized what was going on.
Camilla
But I feel like if you're aware of all of the people and just feel like it's a very if for.
Matt
Anybody, even as an adult, like walking down the aisle as an adult getting married, like there is that feeling of like, oh my. It's like other, all these guys looking.
Camilla
At you, everyone's, you know, dressed. It's, it's, it's a lot.
Matt
Yes. Well, once again, kind of regret you coming on.
Camilla
I think I did a little better this time.
Matt
I don't know if you did. We, you know, it's like we gotta, I don't know, it's just I feel.
Camilla
Like I was doing well until the shark question.
Matt
That did send us off course a little bit. In our defense, that kind of really literally jumped out.
Camilla
It threw me. It threw me.
Matt
It threw me. Yeah, you don't come across those kind of questions kind of stories, to be honest.
Camilla
Of all the stresses I had on the day that I married you. It never crossed my mind once that I would sh at the altar.
Matt
No, No. I never worried about a diarrhea situation, but now I would.
Camilla
People do well.
Matt
Watch out. That's what you're like. Listen, watch out.
Camilla
That's Camilla's advice. Watch out.
Matt
No. Maybe pack some Pepto.
Camilla
It's good advice too.
Matt
That is actually good advice. Because you never know what can happen.
Camilla
You just never know you're having oysters a night before. Be prepared. That's the.
Matt
Seriously. Okay. Clearly you're never coming back on again.
Camilla
I'll be back.
Matt
Thank you.
Camilla
Definitely coming back.
Matt
You guys, thank you once again for tuning in. I hope you don't regret this as much as I do, but we will be calling this the end of the episode. FutureHealth gives millions access to affordable weight loss meds like Ozempic and Semaglutide for less than three bucks a day. Weight loss medications can cost over a third thousand dollars a month, but with Future Health, they can make it four times cheaper. You just take a quick three minute survey and if approved, boom. Your meds are delivered right to your door within 24 hours for free. If you struggle with your weight and feel like nothing is working to lose a couple pounds, weight loss medication like Ozempic may be a good fit for you. If you can't handle needles, you can try an oral Semaglutide, same active ingredient as Ozempic. With Future Health, there's no insurance needed, everything is online and medication is shipped to Your door within 24 hours with free shipping. There are so many perks to being a Future Health member. Find out if weight loss meds are right for you in just 3 minutes@trifh.com that's trifh.com Try fh.com Results vary based on start weight and adherence to diet, exercise and program goals. Data based on independent studies sponsored by Future Health. Future Health is not a healthcare services provider. Meds are prescribed a provider's discretion.
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Does this podcast make you happy? Of course it does. That's why you're here. But it only comes out once a week. For happiness, every night. You need Adam and Eve.
Matt
Yes.
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Call It What It Is: Episode Summary - "Call It Short & Sweet: Let’s Elope"
Released on March 21, 2025 by iHeartPodcasts
In this episode of "Call It What It Is", hosted by Matt and guest Camilla, the dynamic duo delves into the intricate world of wedding planning, exploring the stress and anxiety that often accompany the journey to the altar. Drawing from their personal experiences and listener submissions, Matt and Camilla offer candid insights, humorous anecdotes, and practical advice for couples navigating the highs and lows of preparing for their big day.
Matt kicks off the conversation by reflecting on the immense pressure of traditional wedding planning. Citing a New York Post article, he shares that "6 in 10 couples married in the last year seriously considered eloping" due to the overwhelming costs and stress involved (03:35).
Quote:
"Planning a wedding is so expensive and stressful that 6 in 10 couples married in the last year seriously considered eloping. We did, too." – Matt (03:35)
Camilla concurs, explaining how the overwhelming nature of wedding preparations led them to contemplate a simpler, more intimate ceremony.
Their initial plan involved renting a picturesque beach house in Malibu through Vrbo, aiming for a small, memorable celebration with close friends and family. However, unforeseen circumstances struck when their chosen venue burned down, an event they humorously interpret as a bad omen.
Quote:
"We found the place and we went to go see it and it was like, unbelievable. It's so beautiful. Looked out on the Beach. I just wanted to see the water. And we got it. We got a date in. And we sent out invites." – Matt (04:30)
Quote:
"It burnt down in a horrible omen. When you think about it, you ever wonder... It could have been a bad sign. Maybe." – Matt (05:52)
This disaster pushed them further towards considering eloping, highlighting how unexpected events can dramatically alter wedding plans.
Matt brings up an intriguing statistic from the Huffington Post, revealing that 23% of men find wedding planning to be the most stressful life event, compared to 16% of women. This sparks a discussion on why men might experience more stress despite societal expectations.
Quote:
"According to a survey, 23% of men said they found planning the big day to be the most stressful life event, while only 16% of women said the same." – Matt (08:25)
Camilla suggests that the pressure may stem from partners’ expectations and the desire to meet the envisioned perfection of the day.
Quote:
"The bride has an expectation of what the day will look like and the things involved, and it's to this level of perfection that as a partner." – Camilla (09:02)
The conversation delves into the mutual pressures both partners face, emphasizing the importance of communication and setting realistic expectations to alleviate stress.
Quote:
"If one of the partners is more into it than the other, you're still both wanted to be like." – Camilla (10:16)
Listener Eliana shares her experience where extended photo sessions caused her to miss the reception entirely.
Quote:
"Eliana said we pretty much missed the whole reception because pictures took so long." – Matt (11:33)
Camilla adds that they managed to keep photo sessions concise by setting strict time limits, ensuring they stayed engaged with their guests.
Quote:
"We put, like, a very short time limit on it. I remember we were like, we only have 30 minutes." – Matt (11:48)
Another listener, Hayden, recounts fainting nerves as a seven-year-old flower girl, highlighting the emotional pressures children can also face during wedding ceremonies.
Quote:
"When I was seven, I was the flower girl at my aunt's wedding and I passed out from my nerves." – Ayla (23:05)
Poppy voices her anxiety about managing her menstrual cycle on her wedding day, a concern that resonates with many women.
Quote:
"What if I get my period on the day?" – Poppy (22:27)
Matt provides pragmatic advice, emphasizing preparation and mindset to handle such unexpected moments gracefully.
Quote:
"You need reinforcements. You wear the pad and you wear the tampon and you, you figure it out." – Matt (23:10)
Throughout the episode, Matt and Camilla advocate for considering eloping as a viable alternative to traditional weddings, especially for couples seeking a more intimate and less stressful experience.
Quote:
"Consider eloping. Ask yourself the question, would you enjoy it? Would you be more present if maybe you were kind of selfish with it?" – Matt (19:59)
Camilla echoes the sentiment, highlighting the romantic and liberating aspects of eloping.
Quote:
"I think there's something romantic and sexy about it, too." – Camilla (08:18)
Both hosts emphasize the importance of being present and enjoying the moment rather than getting bogged down by the quest for perfection.
Quote:
"The more you can kind of let go of that stuff, I think it's easier." – Camilla (17:42)
Quote:
"It's very hard to be present when there's so many... you feel like you're having to please everybody." – Camilla (20:07)
From dealing with disruptive speeches to handling personal mishaps, Matt and Camilla share strategies to navigate unforeseen challenges with humor and grace.
Quote:
"You never know what can happen. Maybe pack some Pepto." – Camilla (25:03)
In "Call It Short & Sweet: Let’s Elope," Matt and Camilla provide a heartfelt and humorous exploration of the stresses associated with wedding planning. By sharing their own experiences and those of their listeners, they offer valuable insights into managing expectations, prioritizing presence, and considering alternative wedding paths like eloping. The episode serves as an encouraging reminder that the essence of a wedding lies in the celebration of love, regardless of the scale or setting.
Notable Quotes with Timestamps:
"Planning a wedding is so expensive and stressful that 6 in 10 couples married in the last year seriously considered eloping. We did, too." – Matt (03:35)
"According to a survey, 23% of men said they found planning the big day to be the most stressful life event, while only 16% of women said the same." – Matt (08:25)
"What if I get my period on the day?" – Poppy (22:27)
"Consider eloping. Ask yourself the question, would you enjoy it? Would you be more present if maybe you were kind of selfish with it?" – Matt (19:59)
"You never know what can happen. Maybe pack some Pepto." – Camilla (25:03)
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