Calm Parenting Podcast: Episode Summary

Title: ADHD & ND Kids: 25 Ways To Help
Host: Kirk Martin, Founder of Celebrate Calm
Release Date: October 30, 2024

Introduction

In this episode of the Calm Parenting Podcast, Kirk Martin addresses parents dealing with neurodivergent (ND) children, specifically those with ADHD and related challenges. The focus is on providing 25 practical tools to help manage behaviors such as inattention, hyperactivity, impulsivity, and anxiety. Martin draws from his extensive experience working with over 1,500 challenging children, offering strategies rooted in real-world application and empathy.

Approach to Medication

Kirk emphasizes a cautious approach to medication, advocating it as a last resort due to potential side effects like lethargy and appetite changes.

• Quote:
  "If I were to go to the doctor and the doctor said, hey Kirk, you've got high cholesterol, I want to put you on this medication, I'd say, hey, wait, let what are all the different tools we could use first before we have to go to medication?"
  [06:30]

He likens medication to corrective lenses for vision issues—useful but not a permanent solution. Martin stresses the importance of exploring diet, exercise, stress reduction, and other non-pharmacological interventions before considering medication.

• Quote:
  "If you have a child who has some of these symptoms, I would get a piece of paper, large piece of paper, and on the left side of the paper, I would write down all of their specific symptoms."
  [08:15]

Identifying and Categorizing Symptoms

Martin recommends creating a visual map of a child’s specific symptoms to apply targeted strategies effectively.

1. Focus and Inattention: Easily distracted, executive function issues, forgetfulness.
2. Hyperactivity and Sensory Needs: Difficulty sitting still, fidgeting, sensory sensitivities.
3. Impulse Control: Talking excessively, blurting out.
4. Disorganization and Time Management: Struggles with organizing and managing time.
5. Anxiety and Sensory Issues: Common comorbid conditions affecting behavior.

• Quote:
  "I look at it in a healthy kind of way."
  [10:45]

Practical Tools for Parents and Teachers

Martin outlines numerous strategies organized under various categories to address each symptom cluster.

1. Diet and Nutrition

• Eliminate: Food dyes, preservatives, processed foods, and excessive sugar.

• Incorporate: More protein and healthy foods to improve gut health, which in turn affects mood and focus.

• Quote:
  "If your child's gut doesn't feel good, their stomach doesn't feel good. Well, that causes all of us to be irritable and then that causes us to act out."
  [12:00]

2. Exercise and Physical Activity

• Morning Sensory Exercises: Activities like obstacle courses or treasure hunts to stimulate the senses and expend energy.

• After-School Activities: Rock climbing, martial arts, swimming, and other engaging physical activities to help manage restlessness.

• Quote:
  "You have to change the family culture. You have to get out and get these kids moving."
  [13:30]

3. Environmental Modifications

• Sensory Strips: Textured tape under desks to improve concentration.

• Flexible Seating: Allowing the use of exercise balls or other alternative seating options in classrooms.

• Quote:
  "Kids tend to remember things better when you paint an image, when the brain."
  [17:50]

4. Parental Self-Control and Emotional Regulation

• Modeling Behavior: Demonstrating impulse control and emotional regulation to influence children positively.

• Creating Order: Establishing routines and an orderly home environment to provide stability.

• Quote:
  "Learning to get control of your own emotions will have a big impact."
  [14:20]

5. Teaching Specific Skills

• Assertiveness: Encouraging children to communicate their needs effectively with teachers and peers.

• Time and Energy Management: Focusing on managing energy instead of traditional time management techniques.

• Quote:
  "Teach your kids that there's nothing wrong with their brains, but that they have really good brains."
  [19:00]

6. Leveraging Strengths

• Cultivate Talents: Devote 80% of energy to developing a child’s strengths, gifts, and passions rather than solely focusing on fixing weaknesses.

• Quote:
  "I would really rather you focus 80% of your energy on cultivating your child's strengths, their gifts, talents and passions."
  [16:40]

Innovative Strategies in the Classroom

Martin shares techniques used in classrooms to help ND children stay engaged and manage their behaviors.

• Secret Jobs: Assigning specific tasks to give children a sense of responsibility and focus.

  • Quote:
    "I may give them a secret signal and that means, hey, you've got to come up, grab my water bottle, take the back room, refill it, sit down."
    [15:10]

• Physical Challenges: Incorporating physical activities like chair push-ups or Simon Says to provide cross-brain stimulation.

• Visual Aids: Using whiteboards and visual schedules to help children anticipate changes and reduce anxiety.

Balancing Tools and Medication

Martin reiterates the importance of using targeted tools before considering medication, ensuring that any decision to medicate is specific and measurable based on identified symptoms.

• Quote:
  "If there are still some things where your child is really struggling, if you want to go back to this doctor or psychiatrist and say, hey, I've been doing all these tools here, we're still struggling with this. What else could we do?"
  [21:30]

Empowering Children

The episode underscores the importance of empowering children by helping them understand their unique brains and encouraging self-advocacy.

• Quote:
  "Teach your kids this. That is extremely valuable for their entire lives."
  [23:45]

Martin shares a personal anecdote about his son to illustrate how understanding and managing one’s brain can lead to successful adulthood.

Resources and Programs

Kirk highlights ADHD University, a comprehensive program designed to provide parents with tools and strategies to support their ND children effectively.

• Special Offer:
  Listen to Martin's recommendation to visit celebratecalm.com for a half-price sale on ADHD University and other programs.

Conclusion

Kirk Martin wraps up by encouraging parents to implement the discussed tools gradually and to cultivate their child’s strengths. He emphasizes the transformative power of understanding and supporting neurodivergent children, advocating for a balanced approach that prioritizes the child’s well-being and unique abilities.

• Final Quote:
  "When your kids understand that their brains are good, that there's nothing wrong with them, and here's how it works best, it's kind of like an engine. It's like, here's the best oil and here's the best gas for your engine to work."
  [25:00]

Key Takeaways

• Medication as a Last Resort: Prioritize non-pharmacological interventions before considering medication for ND children.
• Customized Strategies: Tailor tools and strategies to address specific symptoms rather than applying a one-size-fits-all approach.
• Strengths-Based Focus: Invest the majority of efforts in cultivating children’s strengths and passions.
• Empowerment and Understanding: Educate children about their unique brains and encourage self-advocacy.
• Comprehensive Resources: Utilize programs like ADHD University for structured support and guidance.

For more information and resources, visit Celebrate Calm or reach out via email at Casey@CelebrateCalm.com.