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I hate the papal people label our kids as hyperactive. Look, when you put kids with a lot of energy like our son in the right environment, that energy is a distinct advantage. Our son excels leading in a dynamic, fast paced environment and skiing up mountains. But he always got labeled because he had trouble sitting still in a chair for seven hours at school. But that's an arbitrary environment. In the real world. These kids get jobs that require or allow them to move and it becomes an advantage. Our kids struggle to focus on subjects they're not interested in. That's the way the brain is supposed to work. Know that many of your kids are going to hyper focus on a very specific skill set or or interest in life. They're not usually generalists. They'll go very deep in a specific field. My oldest brother is the world's foremost expert in his niche field. You don't have to be good at Everything. Even though everybody tells our kids that lie. I like giving kids perspective. I explain clearly to Casey, hey, everybody has weaknesses and corresponding strengths. The key to being successful in life is spending 90% of your time and energy cultivating your unique strengths, not fixing every supposed weakness. I would tell them, look, you're going to struggle with sitting still and memorizing information for tests because that requires short term memory. But the real world values your critical thinking skills, your ability to see patterns and make decisions and lead other people, and all of your energy. So you'll struggle in school with arbitrary expectations. Oh, but you're going to struggle. You're going to crush it in the real world. And, and that has proven true. I did two really excellent episodes last spring. They're titled A script to explain your child's diagnosis or struggles. Episodes number 490 and 491. Really, really helpful. One way to combat anxiety and meltdowns is to eliminate unknowns. One of our favorite strategies on Sunday night was discussing the week's schedule ahead of time. Because your kids aren't great when you change plan plans at the last minute. So we'd say, hey, I know usually on Wednesday you do X, but this Wednesday you have a doctor's appointment. We always had a whiteboard in the kitchen. It's great because you have multiple kids so they can visually see what's going on that week. Now what I want to cover are the big issues and strategies that you can do and use to help your kids with focus and attention, managing their time, organization, et cetera. So the first section was trouble with focus and attention. Easily distracted, executive function issues, forgetfulness. And a lot of those things are related to brain stimulation issues. Because many of your kids don't get enough blood flow to the brain. Their brains are physiologically under stimulated. Which is why your kids are always trying to stimulate their brains. You've noticed this. How do they do it? Poking their brother, getting a reaction from siblings, arguing with you, pushing your buttons because then you get upset. Procrastination. Look, if you wait till the last minute, guess what? You get an adrenaline rush because now there's pressure and you get blood flow to the brain and it actually helps you focus more. That's why sometimes kids laying off the sofa upside down, blood flow is rushing to their brain. It helps them focus. Fidgeting. Fidgeting is a fantastic way to stimulate your brain. We just have to do it in appropriate ways during homework time and in school. So all those activities are designed to stimulate their brains. Well, what do medications usually do? Well, usually they are stimulants. So what I'd rather do at first is say, hey, what are all the positive ways my child can stimulate his or her brain naturally to help with focus and attention? Chewing gum or a snack or the tassels of their hoodie sweatshirt improves concentration in class. Don't forget to stimulate their olfactory senses. Why do some of us like working in a Panera bread or a coffee shop? I don't even drink coffee, but this smell stimulates my olfactory senses and I concentrate better there. So sometimes during homework light a candle with a certain scent or have their kids do homework while you're cooking. I know a lot of parents now who are taking their kids out to do tough work assignments out at a restaurant for this very reason. Plus like coffee shop makes your kids feel like they're in college or older. I used to put a little of my this is weird but I used to put a little of my edge gel shaving lotion under Casey's nose when he was little. It would stimulate his brain and he liked feeling like a grown up who shaved. Okay, think about this. How many of you have kids who will rock back on the legs of the chair? Well, why are they doing that? I want you to be relaxed this holiday season because you're such busy parents. Wayfair.com just made gift giving easy for us. We have so many different people to buy gifts for with such different tastes and needs. So we went to wayfair.com and got wine glasses and a decanter for our wine enthusiasts, an espresso machine for the coffee lovers, throws and sofa pillows for relatives who moved into a new home and a cute dog bed. Boom. Done all in one place. All of these great gifts ship fast and free and I love that we get accurate email updates for delivery from one place, not like seven different online shops. So we know what is coming when. Get last minute hosting essentials, gifts for all your loved ones and decor to celebrate the holidays. For way less head to Wayfair.com right now to get to shop all things home. That's W a Y f a I r.com Wayfair Every style Every home. So you know what brings us a lot of joy? Getting a text from our daughter in law saying OMG this hungry root, coconut curry, broccoli and pepper bowl is to die for. Like many young couples, she and our son are working extra long hours during the holidays so we're treating them to a couple extra hungry root meals each week. They love hungryroot because it eliminates having to decide what to have for dinner and making that stop at the grocery store when they're tired and hungry. Hungryroot replaces expensive carry out with healthy, delicious meals that only take minutes to prepare. Plus, you can find kids meals that even picky kids love. We love Hungerroot. So take advantage of our exclusive offer. Go to hungryroot.com calm and use code CALM to get 40% off your first box. Plus get get a free item in every box for life. That's hungryroot.com calm code calm to get 40% off your first box. Hungryroot.com calm code calm so rocking back on their chair provides this good sensory pressure on their backs and on their legs. It feels good. There's also brain stimulation because look, when I'm rocking back on a chair, oh, there's a good chance I could fall backwards and crack my head open. I, I know it might not be the way your brain thinks and how you process things, but that's what they're thinking. They love that challenge. We just have to meet those sensory needs in positive ways. So I've mentioned this. They can do homework standing at the kitchen counter, rocking back and forth, chewing on a snack, tapping pencils, listening to music. All of those things stimulate their brains. They create rhythm in the brain, which helps them process, process more effectively. You put a blanket over the kitchen table. Now you have a fort. It's dark under there, so you give them matches. That's okay, don't do that. But you give them a flashlight, they can do homework the way Abraham Lincoln did. It's stimulating. You make chores a challenge, but you can't do that. Chore backwards or blindfolded. Quiz kids on their vocabulary or math facts while they spin, swing, jump rope, lay upside down off the sofa, do homework after intense exercise. We went through a ton of things in episode 518. 10 Ways to Improve focus and executive Function. Now, what about kids who struggle with sitting still? They're fidgety, restless, have some sensory issues. I have classrooms where kids are allowed to sit on an exercise ball. And we mentioned doing Simon says games and chair push ups. Tape. A piece of double sided tape with different textures on it underneath your child's desk. Research and science say when kids rub textured objects, it improves concentration and helps them sit longer. The next set of struggles is impulse control with kids who talk a lot or blurred out. Look, your kids are supposed to be impulsive while they're kids. I just did a podcast on this one, so remember to practice Impulse control with your kids with screens. And we did that with like, hey, if you turn it off three minutes early tonight, you get an extra 10 or 12 minutes on your video games the next day. We've talked about giving kids a talk ticket in class to redeem. Instead of just blurting out, you're giving kids concrete tools to make different choices. You're creating a success and building confidence when one other one would delay gratification. Your kids asked to do something instead of just saying no, say, you know what? Ask me again after you do X. And then their eyes light up and they're like, oh, I might be able to get this, but I have to do this first. That's really cool. Look, you're not going to get these kids to manage their time. You're not getting me to manage my time. I do not manage my time. That is a very linear, neurotypical approach. But neurodivergent people like us work on energy and, and momentum. It's about managing our energy, not our time. It is a critically important concept to teach your kids because this is the way they will work most effectively their entire lives. I just heard the founder of Spotify talked about this and how he uses it in his everyday life. It's fascinating. Casey and I both do our best thinking at odd times on weekends, later at night. It's why I like taking your kids to do homework at 9pm at a local restaurant, during holidays, and especially after exercising or hiking because the endorphins are flowing. We used to take school work for Casey to complete after hockey games. Doing work in public can be extremely helpful because we're picking up on the energy that music. Wherever we are, visuals are important. Our visual kids. Sorry, I'm going so fast. I'm trying to fit three hours into 22 minutes. So. Our visual kids tend to remember things better when you paint an image in their brains. So I used to talk to Casey and in order to get him to do a couple tasks, I say, hey, picture putting these three things in the back of a Lamborghini because he was really into cars and he would remember that. Some of you have kids who do their homework but forget to turn it in. So. So you could make a deal with a teacher. Child comes home, does their homework. You take a picture of their schoolwork on the phone and then email it right away to the teacher. That's acceptable to me. Teachers can help our kids. I just did this one in our training. Back into the classroom. Hey. A lot of our kids struggle with transitions. Hey, when you come back in from recess. I could really use your help. Picture these three things. One water bottle, three paper towels, and the front row of desks in my classroom. And. And now the child knows, oh, you want me to clean the front row of desks? The directions here are very specific. I said three paper towels, not the whole roll. And now the child is cleaning those desks, pressing down on them to get sensory pressure. Remember, wax on, wax off, that motion you're crossing the midline of the brain and body. They get a feeling of and a sense of accomplishment from doing something. And at the end of the scene, the teacher gets to tell your child who's often on trouble and read on the behavior chart. Hey, thank you for your help. You're really good at that. See, it's why I like if you have our programs, email Casey. We will share the relevant downloadable programs with your child's teachers. So they have all of these programs, all of these ideas they can listen to, and then you get to create a positive experience in the classroom. Teachers just need some creative tools, like home. We do. So now just think, we've gone down that left side. We've addressed like, okay, my child struggles with all these different 10 different things, say, and now we have brought to bear changing diet, exercise, all these different tools. And we say, hey, diet is helping a little bit with this area. Sensory exercise is helping my child sit still longer. Moving heavy books is helping with the writing process. Using visuals is actually helping with organization and recall and transitions. But my child is still struggling in these three specific areas. So now if you want, now at least you can go to the doctor or psychiatrist and say, hey, there are three specific areas where we need some help. Is there a specific medication that can address those specific needs? See, that way you can begin with a low dose and measure the effectiveness of the medication and against those three or how many ever specific struggles, as well as any side effects. And I believe that for many of your kids, just using this entire toolbox of different tools will help alleviate in many cases the need for medication. So I mentioned before that I think it's really unethical. It's not what I think it is. It's unethical for schools to recommend that your child be medicated. It's not their job to do that. So one time we kept getting pressured to medicate Casey, and I think it was in second grade. So I sent a note to the school saying, hey, just wanted to let you know, we put Casey on medication. The doctor said it may take a few days for it to kick in. Now, the truth is we hadn't put him on medication. But here's what's really interesting. And I'm fine if you want to judge me for that. It had a placebo effect. Not on our son, but on the school and, and how they viewed him. Teachers began, they started being more patient with him. Now, I'm not saying this is right or wrong, but it worked really well because the school was much more accommodating of Cayce and even said, hey, we're noticing a difference. The only thing that had changed was their perception of him. I'm not recommending that you do that, but it is interesting. So three more big important points. I want your kids to know there's nothing wrong with their brains, that they have all the traits necessary to be wildly successful in life. That their natural abilities to hyper focus and see patterns and think strategically are huge advantages in the real world. Companies don't pay people a lot of money just to follow directions. Oh, but they do. People pay people money. If you have good critical thinking skills and you're good at making decisions and if you're willing to take some risks and you're a leader, that's what our kids have. I want your kids to know how to work most effectively with their brains. Look, I watch Casey do this routinely. Working on momentum, managing his energy instead of his time working while listening to music and fidgeting. He spends most of his energy playing to his strengths. And I want your kids to learn how to advocate for themselves. So listen, this email from a mom, it was really cool. She said we let our son listen to the programs. He was most fascinated by the ADHD University program and said, it feels like this guy knows my brain. He also goes to sleep listening to Casey's program. And those two programs are worth the price even without the sale. So thank you for that, Mom. So he actually went into school and on his own. My son asked his teachers, I know I struggle to focus while doing my worksheets. Would you mind if I sat under my desk and did my work? Because I can focus much better when I'm in confined spaces and nobody's watching me. I promise I won't distract anybody. If that won't work, can I sit in the back of the room on the floor with my back against the wall? Could we try that for a week and see how I do? And he asked another teacher if they could have a code word and pre planned job for him to do, like moving backpacks when he got fidgety so that he could move. And the mom said, I am so proud of him. He's taken responsibility for completing his schoolwork, but he just does it in odd ways. And I've seen his confidence grow and he's always talking about his brain now and how good it is and how he's going to use it in the future. Now that is what we are after. I love that. So if you don't have the programs, take advantage of the Christmas sale. Do that over the holidays, let your kids listen over that break coming up and take over ownership. If you need help, need help financially, email Casey C A s e y celebratecolumn.com thank you. I know I rushed this a lot, but I hope it was helpful. Much respect and love to you all. Bye Bye.