Emilio Vitolo on Canal Street Dreams

Summary

Podcast Summary: Canal Street Dreams Featuring Emilio Vitolo

Episode Title: Emilio Vitolo on Canal Street Dreams
Release Date: July 4, 2025
Hosts: Eddie Huang and Natashia Perrotti
Guest: Emilio Vitolo, Proprietor of Bellottos on Houston Street

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Introduction and Background

The episode kicks off with Eddie Huang warmly welcoming Emilio Vitolo, a New York City legend and the esteemed owner of Bellottos on Houston Street—a restaurant renowned for its challenging reservation process, placing it alongside iconic establishments like Rao's and Hillstone's Corner Store. Emilio shares his deep-rooted connection to New York City's vibrant social scene, highlighting his long-standing presence and passion for the city's culinary landscape.

Eddie Huang [00:17]: "Bellottos is probably one of the hardest reservations to get in New York up there with Rao's and Hillstone's Corner Store."

Reality TV Experience

Eddie reminisces about meeting Emilio in 2018 during the shooting of the "Family Food Feud" pilot for Viacom. Emilio recounts his initial reluctance to participate in reality TV, emphasizing his hesitation to engage in formats he perceived as superficial.

Emilio Vitolo [01:27]: "I'm not going to fudgeing do it. But then guess who gets involved. Mama. So my mother gave me the fucking guilt trip."

Emilio elaborates on how family pressure, particularly from his mother, ultimately convinced him to join the show. He humorously reflects on his past reality TV stint on "Sweet Home Alabama," drawing parallels to contemporary shows like "Love Island."

Emilio Vitolo [02:43]: "Pretty embarrassing. CMT, but whatever."

Family Dynamics and Restaurant Business

A significant portion of the conversation delves into Emilio's familial relationships and the dynamics of running a family-owned restaurant. He shares the story of how his father partnered with local businessman Alfred Lepori to establish Bellottos in 1989. Emilio discusses the challenges he faced when taking over the restaurant in 2008, starting from the bottom by washing dishes despite his background in construction and acoustical work.

Emilio Vitolo [16:34]: "I'm like, come on, man. What the is this?"

Eddie highlights the parallels between his own upbringing in a restaurant environment and Emilio's, noting the constant debates and humor stemming from sibling rivalries.

Eddie Huang [09:43]: "Our family and your family is probably the most similar I've ever seen."

Views on Authentic Italian Food

Emilio passionately discusses the nuances between authentic Italian cuisine and its Americanized counterparts. He defends traditional Italian dishes, particularly Bellottos' three-color cookies, against online criticisms, emphasizing his upbringing influenced by his father's role as a pastry chef.

Emilio Vitolo [19:14]: "I grow up with being over there because my father was a hapasi chef. So I think in my mind, I enjoy that place very well."

Eddie echoes Emilio's sentiments, contrasting American Italian staples like spaghetti and meatballs with the refined flavors he experienced in Sicily, underscoring the depth and authenticity often missing in mainstream American interpretations.

Eddie Huang [21:24]: "It's American Italian food, which is its own thing that I really like respect and honor and is probably my favorite."

Personal Stories on Parenting and Pets

The hosts shift focus to personal anecdotes about parenting and pet ownership. Emilio shares heartfelt stories about his challenges balancing work with being a present father, drawing parallels to his own strained relationship with his father. He discusses the complexities of raising children while maintaining a business legacy, touching on his efforts to instill positive values despite his upbringing.

Emilio Vitolo [48:32]: "It's so crazy because, you know, like, growing up, my father was never around, and I hated that motherfucker's guts."

Eddie contributes by sharing experiences with his former dog, Mr. Chow, highlighting the unconditional love and challenges that come with owning a protective breed. Both hosts reflect on the impact of their parental figures and their aspirations to be more emotionally present for their children.

Chris Gethard [46:04]: "I've been doing the same shit my dad did... working till like, 2:00am."

Relationship with Parents

A poignant segment explores the intricate relationship Emilio has with his father. He opens up about their past conflicts and the eventual realization of mutual respect and understanding. Emilio emphasizes the importance of honoring his father's legacy while carving his own path in the restaurant industry.

Emilio Vitolo [52:50]: "I'm gonna fucking respect that. So the second I came into terms with that and realized, like, that's the way it fucking goes... I've been fucking golden."

Eddie parallels his own struggles with his parents, acknowledging the lack of emotional connection despite professional success. He reflects on the universal desire for parental affirmation and the challenge of bridging emotional gaps.

Chris Gethard [54:53]: "You wouldn't be you."

Current Entertainment Projects

Towards the end of the episode, Emilio transitions to discussing his ventures in the entertainment industry. He reveals the establishment of his production company, Little Italy Productions, and mentions two films he is currently producing: "Apophenias" and "Lake George." Additionally, Emilio hints at upcoming projects that draw from his personal experiences, such as a drama focusing on father-son relationships in the restaurant business.

Emilio Vitolo [58:16]: "I have two scripts that I have been sitting on for a while that I want to get done. One's about my grandmother, and then the other one's about father, son relationship, growing up in the restaurant business."

Eddie expresses excitement over Emilio's transition into entertainment, appreciating his unique energy and potential for creative projects.

Chris Gethard [60:23]: "You have, like, a rare energy. So I'm excited that you're stepping into the entertainment stuff."

Conclusion

The episode concludes with mutual expressions of respect and gratitude. Emilio thanks the hosts for having him, highlighting the meaningful conversation about legacy, family, and personal growth.

Emilio Vitolo [60:30]: "Thank you so much. Thank you, guys for having me."

Notable Quotes

• Emilio Vitolo [01:27]: "I'm not going to fudgeing do it. But then guess who gets involved. Mama."
• Eddie Huang [21:24]: "It's American Italian food, which is its own thing that I really like respect and honor and is probably my favorite."
• Emilio Vitolo [48:32]: "It's so crazy because, you know, like, growing up, my father was never around, and I hated that motherfucker's guts."
• Chris Gethard [54:53]: "You wouldn't be you."
• Emilio Vitolo [58:16]: "I have two scripts that I have been sitting on for a while that I want to get done. One's about my grandmother, and then the other one's about father, son relationship, growing up in the restaurant business."

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This episode of Canal Street Dreams offers an intimate glimpse into Emilio Vitolo's life, balancing the pressures of family legacy, the pursuit of authentic culinary excellence, and the demands of modern parenthood. Through candid conversations and shared experiences, Eddie Huang and Natashia Perrotti facilitate a rich dialogue that not only celebrates Emilio's achievements but also delves deep into the personal challenges he navigates as a father and business owner.

Transcript

[Chris Gethard]

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[Chris Gethard]

Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. All right, welcome back Canal Street Dreams. We have a New York City legend, downtown legend Nolita. All right. Emilio Vitolo is in the house. Did I pronounce that correctly? Yes, yes, yes. The proprietor, owner of Bellottos on Houston Street. Probably one of the hardest reservations to get in New York up there with Rao's and the. That really fancy Houston's Hillstones corner store, you know, but yo, I'm a. I'm a big fan of what you do. And also, I just known you from partying and being around New York forever. So welcome to the show, brother.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Thank you very much. Thank you for having me, brother.

[Chris Gethard]

Ye, man. What's it called? A lot. A lot to talk about. But I remember I met you. Was it 2018 in LA is when I met you?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes, it was for that. What was it? It was Viacom.

[Chris Gethard]

Viacom. Family. Family Feud. Yeah, Family Food Feud. And like, I had already been to Balados before. How. How did you end up getting roped into shooting the Family Food Feud pilot for Viacom?

[Emilio Vitolo]

So what happened was I. I got a phone call and my brothers were like, yo, you got to do this family food feud thing with us. I'm like, what the. You talk. I don't want to do no reality, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

So it came into the brothers.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, okay, okay. This makes sense for me.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I'm like, yo, I don't want to do. No. I did reality before. We'll talk about.

[Chris Gethard]

Because it surprised me. You were on. I was like, these guys don't need press.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. No. So for me, I'm like, yo, how the fuck is that going to benefit me? Like, absolutely not. I'm not going to fudgeing do it. But then guess who gets involved. Mama. So my mother gave me the fucking guilt trip. And then, you know, she's coming at me hard and she's like, you're going to fuck this up for your brothers. You got to do this. Your brothers need this. Da da, da, da da. So I was like, oh, my God. I'm like, all right, fuck it, I'll do it. Let's go. We're going to go to. You know, we booked the fucking ticket. We all booked it together. We were excited. You know, we had like, A little brothers meeting. And then we go over there and I. I see Andrew Glassman on set. So the last reality show that I did, that. It was Sweet Home Alabama. It was. It was like a Bachelor type show.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Pretty embarrassing. Cmt, but whatever.

[Chris Gethard]

I gotta. I gotta watch this. I didn't know. I'm watching.

[Emilio Vitolo]

No, no, no, no.

[Unknown]

I was.

[Chris Gethard]

Florida.

[Unknown]

That I love.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh, my God.

[Chris Gethard]

We're watching this tonight. We're running this back.

[Unknown]

Bachelor, like, Love island right now is so hot.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. But you know what? This is like, one female and, like, 20 dudes. So there's a one V, 20 country and 10 cities. So for me, I'm like.

[Unknown]

I like that premise. Country versus City.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. No, I mean, the premise was pretty cool.

[Chris Gethard]

I'm watching this show.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I was not in my element with that. I will tell you that. I would say that was the first time. Listen to this. First time I ever got stung by a bee.

[Unknown]

Really?

[Emilio Vitolo]

And first time I got stung by a jellyfish was in Fairhope, Alabama, trying.

[Chris Gethard]

To win this reality love competition.

[Unknown]

That's like eco.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Trying to find, like. You know, we were talking about this before, but I'm like, I'm not. I'm not trying to be a cocky guy by any means, but, like, I'm. You know, I wasn't there for that. You know, Know, I. I tried to give it a shot just to see what the.

[Unknown]

You didn't find love in Alabama, but you did make a friend.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I did. I made a lot of friends. A lot of friends.

[Chris Gethard]

I always wanted to be on Singled Out. When I was a kid, I thought Jenny McCarthy was hot. And I was like, yo, I want to be on Single Out.

[Unknown]

I wanted to be on Next so bad. Do you remember Next.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Next.

[Unknown]

Wow. Generational gap. Okay. So it was mtv. They had, like, four girls on a bus and. Or whatever gender swap. But, like, there would be, like, the dating contestant who was picking. Then the other people would be on a bus, and you'd, like, come out of the bus.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Okay.

[Unknown]

And they would three facts about you to be like, jenny has huge tits. Like, loves the Spice Girls, doesn't like spicy food. And it was just like, at any point, you could be on the date with the person, and the person would be like, next. Get the out.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh.

[Unknown]

And it was just so humbling to me. I was like, I need to experience a person being like. You're like, oh, my God. And, yeah, I love.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And then they're like, yeah. Not into it.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

It's like looking at a MySpace profile.

[Unknown]

And at the End. They're like, whoever they choose, they're like, well, you can get paid for the amount of minutes you've been on this date, or you can have a second date. And everyone would always choose the money. Like, they'd be like, I'll take the five bucks. Oh, I'm out.

[Emilio Vitolo]

That's. That's up.

[Unknown]

I can't believe you guys don't know.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Next we're running.

[Chris Gethard]

How far did you make it on Sweet Home Alabama?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh, I made it. I think I was top five or six.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, wow.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Top five or six.

[Chris Gethard]

That's pretty good.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, that's pretty good. Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

On any of those shows, I think I'd be, like, out in the first episode. Like.

[Unknown]

Like, I don't think.

[Chris Gethard]

Chinese guy. That looks like a Red Bull fridge out of here.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, but no, you'd go far.

[Unknown]

You'd go far.

[Emilio Vitolo]

No, I. You know what I think the main problem was with that show is, like, you know, when it comes to, like, Southern hospitality, these guys are like. The men are, like, very polite and, like, that. They're not used to a. Like, me cursing, you know, so I'm like. I go over there and they're like, holy. Who the hell is this guy? Like, you know.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, you have, like, a personality. Stuff like that. Yeah, same.

[Unknown]

They're like, not in front of the lady.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, exactly. I'm like, shut the fuck up, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

Like, yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Give me a fucking break.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. I dated a more conservative girl once, many, many years ago, and her note to me was just like, I think you could add some more chivalry into your game. I. Get out of here.

[Emilio Vitolo]

The.

[Chris Gethard]

I was like, I do it when I want to. I feel like I'm chivalrous with you.

[Unknown]

I was gonna say, she's not wrong.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But like, oh, my God.

[Unknown]

But, like, I also. I also think that we. I like your energy.

[Chris Gethard]

Thank you.

[Unknown]

You're. You give me what I need.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

When I need it.

[Emilio Vitolo]

That's important. Yeah, that's very important.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, same. And your wife probably loves that you have a potty mouth. You know, she probably wants that some.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I mean, sometimes, but now, you know, when it comes to the kid, it's like, yo, don't. Don't curse in front of the kids. Kind of try and knock that out. I don'. My kid being, like, the first, really.

[Unknown]

And it's mainly because of me. I was like. He said. He looked at me, he said, oh. And I was like, oh, he dropped a balloon.

[Chris Gethard]

He dropped a water balloon and goes, oh, he love.

[Unknown]

Everything is. Oh, shit. And I'm like, oh, God, this is me.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, I didn't get that yet. We. We got frogs at the house. Like, I thought it'd be cool to like get frogs, so I. Frogs, Frogs.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Red eyed tree frogs.

[Unknown]

Okay, cool.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, those crazy ass eyes.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I didn't realize how tough it was to set up. Like that whole. Yeah, that's a lot thing.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Like the environment for the frog.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. It's like, yo, the humidity, the heat, the dot. Everything's got to be on time.

[Unknown]

Don't you have to feed them like crickets?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Crickets and mealworms.

[Chris Gethard]

I hate keeping those things in the house.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But you wouldn't. You see them grab, grab them like real quick. Yo, it happens so quickly. You're like, holy. Yeah, that was wild.

[Chris Gethard]

But anyway, so I kind of want one now. But I hate having bugs in the house.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Nah, man, we're not a lot of work.

[Unknown]

No, we're not going frogs.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It is a lot of work. But anyway, so I'm trying to teach my daughter how to say frog. And then she keeps on saying. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. I'm like, this can't be. This can't be it.

[Unknown]

No, no, no.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Like, no, no, no, no, no. And I said, I'm trying to get her to pronounce it. I'm like, all right. She's like, she's like, fuck, fuck, fuck. I'm like, oh, my God. But thank God I got. Now I got her saying foggy, foggy.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah, we just accept it. We're like, our kid is going to have a potty mouth. He already says, shit.

[Unknown]

I just know who I am. And I'm like, I. I would just not be able to stop. Like, I'm like, this is natural. He's going to say what he's going to say. I was the same way as a kid.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, I was.

[Unknown]

Oh, everything when I was.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But you know, I grew up like, yo, we got old school parents. Like, my father, every word out of his mouth was. He would be like, you, you. He'd be cursing at me like crazy. I went to Catholic school, so I went to Our lady of Pompeii on Bleaker and Carmine Street. All nuns, bro. So I would always get in trouble for cursing. And I would always be in the principal's office. But it's because at home my, my father was always cursing.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, my mom had to potty mouth. My mom was calling my dad a fucking bitch.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know what I mean? Fucking bitch.

[Chris Gethard]

The restaurant wasn't making like, as much money as my mom wanted. She's like, you're a fucking bitch.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Step up, be gang. Step in a. Funny.

[Chris Gethard]

When I grow up, man, some woman's gonna yell fucking bitch.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I would love for my mother to call my father a fucking bitch. That'd be the most funniest thing ever.

[Chris Gethard]

My mom does it all the time, bro. All the time. I'm surprised your mother has, like. I found out today that you are part Chinese. I had no idea.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, man. My mother is. She's Peruvian and Chinese, and my father's just straight up Italian. So I'm a blend of.

[Unknown]

That's spicy.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Our family. My family and your family is probably the most similar I've ever seen. We both grew up in a restaurant.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

You know, you're. You're both have Chinese moms. Both of our dads is the ones kind of running the restaurant. We got three brothers.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yep.

[Chris Gethard]

And the three brothers is all beefing all the time. It's great.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Always great. Always drama.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. But your dynamic with your bros that I saw on the show was straight comedy, because on the show, it was like the pilot Family Feud. It was like your family cooking versus, like, a Chinese restaurant family cooking. And everyone thought I was going to be biased and, like, go Chinese. Like, no, these. These withholders are the funniest motherfuckers I've ever met. You just reminded me of my brothers. And all you guys did was argue in the kitchen.

[Emilio Vitolo]

We were fighting the whole fucking time. I'm like, yo, don't fucking do it. I'm yelling at my brother because I. So on that show, I think I was the first one to get. I forget how it went down where it was like, you have to pick who.

[Chris Gethard]

Pick one person who does the challenge.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

But no, it was. They. They ended up. Each family could give the other family an ingredient to cook with. So the Chinese family gave you guys the mifin to cook with.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

And then you guys had to make chacho a pepe with me finger.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

And your brother just. He just fumbled. Crazy. Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

He was cooking it like regular pasta, which, you know, I mean, may. You never. With the. How do you say it may. Funnel me fin. He never with those noodles before. You know what I'm saying? So he didn't know what the. He was doing.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, he came out with, like, just nappy nude. The was all clumped up together.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I remember, because then, you know, it goes back to the judges, and they were like, yo, he Overcooked the pasta and he was like this. Yeah, this. This a fixed ass show. I'm like, yo, bro. I'm like, yo, kind of overcooked the. It ain't pasta, bro. Like I don't know what the to tell you, cuz he was yelling it.

[Chris Gethard]

On the show like it's fixed. And I'm like, bro, it's a pilot. This isn't even going to air.

[Emilio Vitolo]

This isn't even air N. He got so mad. He was like, I'm a. I'mma all these up. I was like, yo, chill, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

Dude, I. I wish I want to watch that episode. It's so good. It's one of like the best episodes of television. I've been a part of that like never aired. Like that thing was incredible.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Maybe we could get the footage. We gotta hit a. I got Brian Landman's Glassman's numbers.

[Chris Gethard]

Put it up on YouTube.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, yeah. And be like, yo, this is the lost episode. And see how well it does.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know what I'm saying?

[Chris Gethard]

It was incredible because they were supposed to beef with the other family and all they did was beef with each other.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, we were attacking each other. Someone beefed, you know, proper brothers. But I mean, we're in the restaurant together, we fight. I mean, we don't fight every day, but we argue about all the time.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Of the brothers, right. Are you the one that is was the most interested in the restaurant as a kid?

[Emilio Vitolo]

No.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, okay. Who's most interested?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Mario. Oh, he's the oldest. He's the firstborn. He's the only one that legitimately went to school for culinary. So he went to NYT first and then after NYT he went to CW Post and he got his culinary degree. He wanted to take over the restaurant. And then, you know, I don't know what the happened. Whatever. It is what it is, but what ended up happening was my brother joined the nypd. He continued to work at the restaurant. Anthony at the time was. Got a scholarship for football or Hofstra University and at that. Yeah. Way in Quebec. Quebec. Back in the day. Oh my God. You don't. It's not even around anymore, right?

[Chris Gethard]

No, they don't even got the program. You were.

[Emilio Vitolo]

What about Bogarts? Was it Bogarts or. It was Corvettes and then Bogarts. I remember we used to have late nights, man. Holy. Holy shit.

[Chris Gethard]

So your brother football, the older brother cop. And then.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And then me, I was in construction.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And then I was acting as well. So I was. I was in construction first I was, I got kicked out of school and I was like 16 years old. And you know, then I, I started doing the street thing. That wasn't really working out for me. And then, and then I started going legit and then just doing construction. So I started out with John Dominic Cusimano contracting in, in Lynbrook or Valley Stream area over there. And you know, he took me under his wing like, like, like a father, man. That motherfucker had me living in his house. Like, he like really put a roof over my head and like, tried to get me to do the right thing, you know, because I was up a lot. That's when my parents were like, yo, out of here.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

They're like, yo, you ain't doing this in my house. You know. And. Yeah. So after that happened, then I joined Local 157. And then my father gave me an option to jump into the restaurant. This is back in 2008. And that's, that's when I officially jumped in.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, one of the best choices you made with your life, right?

[Emilio Vitolo]

I mean, listen, for me it was like he gave me an option. He was just like, yo, listen, you could work for somebody the rest of your life and do perfectly fine. You can make a lot of fucking money. Maybe the construction thing, maybe whatever the fuck you're trying to do, or he's like, you could take the reins on the fucking restaurant and one day this is going to be yours. So I thought about it and you know, when I got that phone call, he just called me like something really important I got to fucking talk to you about. Call me back right away. So I'm thinking like, I hadn't spoken to him in like a couple of years. Like him and I beef, you know, we had a lot of beef. So I was like, oh shit, I wonder if he's sick or something's going on, you know. So I started getting nervous and then he was like, come by the restaurant. So after my wrap up day, I was working at Juilliard at the time for Jacobson & Co. And I specialize in acoustical work. And I left there at like 218. I was by the restaurant probably around like 3:30 or something like that. And that's when he put it on me. He was like, yo, fucking, I think you should, you should fucking do this. I know you're doing very well right now, but I'm giving you an option to be the big dog over here. And I was like, okay, yeah, fuck it. I thought it took me about three months to four months to think about it. And I was like, yo, fuck it. I'm game. And then this asshole had me fucking downstairs washing dishes and sweeping fucking floors. And then, you know, I had it out with him. And I was like, yo, fuck you. I was like, yo, how the fuck. How dare you, like, try and get me to come into this? And now you got me washing dishes and cleaning floors? And he was like, well, you think you're too good to do that? I was like, yeah, I think I'm too good to do that shit. Like, I was in construction. I started from the bottom up, you know? Like, I was sweeping floors over there. You know, I was like a fucking laborer. And then I started working my way up the ladder. Now you tell me I got to start from, you know, the bottom up on this?

[Chris Gethard]

Like, you invested money to sweep floors? That's crazy.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I'm like, come on, man. What the is this? So he was like, look at me. If you think you're better than any of these guys in the kitchen, you think you're better than him, him, him. You don't belong in this business. He goes, you. You do something else. So I bit the bullet. At the time, I was only getting paid 300 a week cash.

[Unknown]

Wow.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And I'm like, yo, I need more money. And he was like, you need more money? He goes, I'm giving you knowledge. I'm like, how are you giving me knowledge? You're not giving me knowledge for shit. Like, I'm fucking washing dishes and sweeping the fucking floor. So then he started moving me up, like, every year. He'd fucking move me up.

[Chris Gethard]

Year?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. Wow. Pretty much like a. Like a yearly type of thing. Wow. You know, so it was like, first that washing dishes, and then it was like, okay, now I'm gonna teach you how to make pasta. Then we're gonna do pastries. Now you're gonna do prep work. Now you're gonna jump on the line. Now you're the head chef.

[Unknown]

Your father was a pastry chef at Ferraris, right?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes. He was a head pastry chef at Hours back in the day. So crazy how we got the restaurant.

[Unknown]

Wow.

[Emilio Vitolo]

So him and Alfred Lepori. Alfred Lepore owns that whole block?

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Down on Mulberry. Yeah. Mobile and Grand.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. So it's Grand Street. It's on that south side on the Chinatown side. And he used to work for my. My father used to work for him. And Bolatos came up for sale. And this is back in 1989. And my father was like, yo, I won't take a paycheck. Can I. Can I do this? Like, can you front me the fucking money? Da da, da, da, da. Let's do this together. I won't take a paycheck. Da da da da. And Alfred was like, all right, fuck it. He took a chance, gave my father a shot, and my father saved up his money. And then, you know, for the remainder of the money, he borrowed some money from some guys, you know, neighborhood guys, like, you know, like family guys.

[Chris Gethard]

Go Shadows.

[Emilio Vitolo]

They're good guys. They're good guys.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And he bought him out in 1996, but they bought it in 1991. It was just Bellottos. 1996, the name changed to Emilio's Bellotto. And. Yeah. And, yeah, the rest is, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

That's an incredible story. Ferrara, Ferraras and Viros, I still think are the two best old school Italian bakeries.

[Emilio Vitolo]

They're great.

[Chris Gethard]

Manhattan.

[Emilio Vitolo]

They're great. I mean, I had it out with some fucking people from the last podcast. I fucking did. I got to stop reading the comments and shit, because I got, like, what they say. I'm looking at all this shit like, oh, what the fudge do you know about cannolis and that? And I'm like, yo, I'm not talking. First of all, I'm like, let's get something fucking straight. I said it was my fucking opinion. Yeah, everyone's entitled to their fucking opinion. My father, I grew up with being over there because my father was a hapasi chef. So I think in my mind, you know, I enjoy that place very well. You know, Like, I don't. I don't think anybody does three color cookies better than they do.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, and it's. It's the old style, you know, I.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Get warnings from that, from homies all the time that, like, you know, they're, like, in the public eye in regards to, like, social media and shit. And they're like, you do not fucking read any of the comments, bro.

[Unknown]

The comments. I like to. I'll get in there and get messy because I'm like, he doesn't. But someone will say some shit. And I'm like, oh, yeah, but let's go.

[Chris Gethard]

DM me.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Let's go.

[Unknown]

I have something to say.

[Chris Gethard]

I.

[Unknown]

Let's. We're talking now.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I had some. I was like, yo, you talking. Everyone talking. I'm like, yo, you want to be a big dog, come find me at the restaurant. They're like, send me the address. I'm like, use Google. Like, yeah, you could pull that up in two Seconds, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

Anytime I respond to, like, someone's like, you're wrong. And then I respond and clarify like, yo, my bad, yo. Big fan.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Big fan.

[Chris Gethard]

The comments are so totally hilarious.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know what I think it is? I think they just, like, they want recognition and acknowledge.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

That's what it is. But I got shit from saying three color cookies, which, I mean, listen, you want me to say Trekalore? Okay. I say fucking Trekalore.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But it's not. You know, those aren't really Italian cookies. That's an Americanized fucking thing. But a lot of people don't fucking know that shit.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know, that shit I fucking grew up with. So I'm just talking about what. What, you know, motherfuckers interviewing me. I'm just telling him, you know, how I fucking grew up and what I enjoyed eating and what I think is good.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. For me, the things that I enjoyed eating when I go to Italy, Sicily, things like that. The closest things to that type of, like, Mediterranean food that's native to Italy. It's probably like going to the Greek restaurants in Astoria, to be honest. Just like a fish cut in half, grilled with some olive oil and lemon. Like, that's what you're getting when you go to Sicily, you know? And a lot of that is, like, in Queens in a Greek restaurant.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, right.

[Chris Gethard]

You know, the Italian restaurants that everybody loves in New York, like, red sauce. That's American Italian food, which is its own thing that I really like respect and honor and is probably my favorite. You know, like. Like, if. If I'm eating Italian food, that's, like, what I'm thinking about when I want to eat Italian food.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

But when I go to Sicily, I'm like, yo, yeah, let me. Let me get, like, a fresh tuna that's just grilled with. With lemon, sea salt and olive oil, you know, like, that's what they're doing out there.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. It's different because over here is, like, everyone says spaghetti and meatballs and chicken parm and veal palm, but that. That's all Italian. American dishes. That's not real fudgeing Italian shit.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. It's like general toast for Chinese food, you know? And it's fine. It's beautiful, beautiful food that, like, we love. I need that shit.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. No, it's good comfort.

[Unknown]

I agree.

[Chris Gethard]

It's so different. Even, like, squidding pasta. When I went to Sicily, like, they're breaking the squid in sack in there and then using dry Barilla Spaghett and picking it up, and I'm Like, I love this. You go over here, it's like, oh, the squidding is already baked into the pasta when you go make the squidding. So it's just. It's cool to see the differences in Italian food from America to, like, old country.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

You know?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

I wouldn't say one is better than the other, to be honest.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's just, it's. Listen, it's what you grew up with and what. What you feel like is good. You know what I'm saying? Like, that. That's. That's what it is.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah. And also, you know, to get back to the way your dad, like, was training and raising you, it's now that I've been in the business so many years. When I was 15, I started working as a busboy. As 14 or 15, I started work as a busboy after school every day, 3:30, come get paid. 525 an hour, plus the tips. And I was a busser first. Then I was a prep cook. Then they let me. Like, when you're a prep cook, you graduate to being the best prep cook. They let you cut the steaks and they check the measurement, the ounces on every steak. And I'm like, this really just taught me how to sell drugs. Yeah, you're really just preparing me to sell drugs.

[Emilio Vitolo]

The finger method, right?

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Doing things like that. And I like new, like, it was cutting New York strips. Taught me how to, like, fuck around with a scale, you know. Then they graduated me from prep. I could grill the steaks and working on the grill. The last one was a saute, because saute, you got to make the sauces and everything over there. Saute was a little harder. And the final boss position for me was expediter. Right. That was the one. 17 years old, I'm expediting. That, to me, was the hardest spot in the restaurant.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

You know. Did you. Did you expedite?

[Emilio Vitolo]

I did everything in the fucking restaurant, man. It's crazy. But, you know, for me, it was like, I hated being in the kitchen. You know, I used to get paid, like, top dog money to cook for a lot. A lot of Hollywood people. Yeah, I do a low key. But I hated it. I hated it. I do it very well because I'm like, when I do something, I'm like a perfectionist, and I like to get it perfect. It has to be perfect when I'm doing it. But I never got down, like, I never like getting down with. With cooking.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, it was funny too, because when I popped, I would tell Everybody, don't call me a chef, because I don't want to get stuck doing this. Yeah, I'll be right.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yo, let's switch this shit up real quick. I'm like, yo, don't call me chef anymore, you know, because you get stuck.

[Chris Gethard]

You know what I mean? If they see you that way, you get stuck. But for me, what happened? Like, after doing everything, being a writer, I would say my favorite thing to do is writing. Just sit by myself and write. That is my favorite thing to do. But I have to be honest. Cooking, I really missed it. And, like, my favorite position to see a restaurant from is from the position of the expediter.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

And, like, you know, she. She came in for the first time. She never really seen me cook, because when I met her, I wasn't cooking like that. I met her in 2021.

[Unknown]

I was so turned on back there. He was expediting. I. It was like, watching him, like. It was like, hand of God. I was like, something is coming through him. I was.

[Chris Gethard]

She's probably pregnant because I shot the club up crazy last week.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I think she just got pregnant right now.

[Unknown]

More babies after seeing this, and it was like. I was just. I don't know, something about it. It was like seeing you're so passionate about it. And I think seeing somebody be so passionate about something or just be so good at something, like, there's nothing hotter than watching a man be good at something.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And you're. You just, like, you were. Your energy. You were in control. I was just like, yeah, that's okay. Sure.

[Chris Gethard]

It was funny, because I always want people to see me as, like, a writer or director. Right. Like, I. I love that. But I can't deny that from the age of 17, I've been doing this. This is what I do. This is what I have 70,000 hours doing. And it's like, you can put me in any restaurant. It'll take me 48 hours to learn everybody and see, like, okay, that saute guy's gonna get ahead of the fryer guy, and this guy's a little bit behind. But once I figure out where everybody is, I can get all the tickets fired correctly. But, of course, you know, what's your favorite spot in a restaurant to see the restaurant from?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Well, I mean, I'll be honest. The kitchen is the most important prep. The prep. Prep has to be done the right way. Yeah, that's. That's, like, the heart and soul of the kids. If you don't have your prep work, like, in check, you're Shot.

[Chris Gethard]

Absolutely.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You're so shot. But you got to watch those guys and make sure that, like, they're setting up for the day and they have a certain amount of, you know, orders of pasta ready to go. And the chicken, you know, like, it's tough because the chicken parms and like, that we got to do it per order.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

In the beginning, what was happening was I was training the guys, and these guys were trying to pre make all the chicken cutlets.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, par frying?

[Emilio Vitolo]

No, no, not. Not par frying. Like, they would, like the raw chicken, the freaking flour, dunk it in the egg wash, put it in the breadcrumbs. Da, da, da, da.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And then just stack a whole bunch of them. I'm like, yo, bro, what the fuck? So what ended up happening was one night, a lot of chicken parms were coming back, and I'm like, yo, what the fuck is going on? So I'm like, yo, make me a chicken parm right now. The made me a chicken parmesan. And I realized that it was so dry, so they were letting it sit there. They were trying to prep a day prior to. No, I'm like, yo, you can't do that shit, bro. Like, what the fuck? So, you know, for me is, like, watching them prep, like, and get that shit done in the beginning, like, that that's the most important, and that's what I enjoy watching the most.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. And that's why the old way that your father trained you and my father trained me, where you know every spot and you know what they do. The point isn't for you to become a dishwasher for life. It's that you can't control the restaurant if you don't know how to do the job. And you can't think with that person's mind. Because I think the reason why your pops left as a dishwasher for a year, mine left me as a busboy for years. It's not just knowing the job and the checklist, but it's to start to think, like, that person.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

Because then you know how they're going to cut corners and how they're going to steal and how they're going to do it the easy way, you know what I'm saying? Because, like, as a buser, I knew you start to figure out, okay, I want to work with the head waiter, and I know what the head waiter wants, so I'm going to, like, focus more my time energy on the headwaiter. And then this guy who's got, like, you know, the people at the side tables in the bar. I'm not paying attention to that shit because there's no tips coming over there. And once you start to see how the mind works in that position, you can own a restaurant and operate it.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

So many people operating restaurants now, it's like, what's the Food Network?

[Emilio Vitolo]

They don't know shit. I'm going to say a majority of the motherfuckers that own restaurants now, like, they don't know dick. They will just think that you can just pay somebody to be in that position and everything's gonna work out, and that's not the way it works.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. And especially the owners that are front of the house. Guys. The chicken parmesan is a great example, because you'll talk to the chef at a restaurant. Oh, I got you. We're gonna. We're gonna bread it, we're gonna stack it up, and then they're gonna fly. Like, I can get this out the door in five minutes once the ticket comes in. Okay, cool. That sounds like a good solution. But they. When they come back, they don't know how to fix it. Yeah, you do. Like, the way is probably like. All right, fine. In prep, I'll let you. You could cut the cutlets. You could pound them out. I'll even let you put it into the egg wash. Fine. Yeah, but you bred it on the line.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Right.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Do it. Listen, in general, there's no fucking. And you know this. There's no shortcuts.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

There's no fudgeing shortcuts. It's. It's a hard fudgeing business to be in, and it's very time consuming. This is why a lot of people don't fucking do it. And a lot of people, you know, aren't very successful. And the small amount that are successful, they're doing the fucking work. Yeah, you. You have to fucking. You have to do the work. I'm sorry. There's no fucking shortcuts.

[Chris Gethard]

And that's why I'm so happy to be back in a restaurant versus Hollywood, because Hollywood has shortcuts. There's a lot of smoke and mirrors. There's a lot of shortcuts in a restaurant. There's no shortcuts. There's no cheating, because the person has to eat it and then pay for it. Like. Like, it's got to be good or that person's not going to pay you.

[Emilio Vitolo]

There's no good food in Hollywood, bro. I'm sorry.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

You have to. You have to go a little bit outside.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I don't think.

[Chris Gethard]

I think the immigrant food is good outside. But no, the. The places that you would take your lady, you go out on a date, you go do business. Terrible.

[Unknown]

Going to dinner in Hollywood sucks. But like, the immigrant food, if you go a little bit outside, it's like the Persian food.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I'm trying to think of the only place that. Because I was in, in Cali for a little bit. I used to live there for a little bit, but I used to go to Katsuya all the time.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Is that place still around?

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, they actually do a good sushi delivery. Like when I lived in the hills, I would, I would get Katsuya sushi delivery.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Okay.

[Chris Gethard]

Pretty good.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I would try and always get. I would go like late night, try and get there on the later side. And they will always be out of that, like special fried rice that they would. Yeah, yeah. Like you. Every time I'm. And then they would do like this spicy edamame too. Yeah, I still haven't had like a spicy edamame like that.

[Chris Gethard]

But some, some of their, like iconic restaurants, like there's this Italian restaurant, Pache, that's in Laurel Canyon, right next to the. The Canyon store.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Everyone sits there, like, they just pop Brad and his new girl out there and yo, that is probably the worst Italian food I've ever had. You don't got to say nothing because I'm trying to get you in trouble. But yo, yeah, I'm not saying. Yeah. I got pasta from there once and the water from the like, you know when people want to put a little bit of pasta water in and it's like kind of cute. Oh, they opposed heat, bro. It was all pasta water. It separated in the dish. I was like, bro, I'm just drinking pasta water. It was terrible.

[Unknown]

Also we like got a bottle of wine and it was a screw top. Like they came to the side of the table and like unscrewed the.

[Chris Gethard]

I was like, okay, this is like at least organic.

[Unknown]

I was like, should we just do that in the back? I was like, don't let me know. There's no cork. Like it was. It's just like a hot mess.

[Chris Gethard]

A restaurant, it was a hot mess. Everybody just goes, cuz you're in the canyon and it's beautiful. You see deer across the street. But this sauce broke down. Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know what? They probably use like a highly processed pasta.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I'm not, I mean, I'm not going to start firing off on pasta company.

[Chris Gethard]

But you know, you know, you know why the Shit's breaking down is horrible.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You don't want to eat that. If it's smooth and it doesn't have any texture and it looks like brown. Stay the. Away from it. Because in Italy, so in Italy, what they do is that the drying process, it's for such a longer time, and they dry it at a cooler temperature. In the States, we dry it over here at a very high temperature. So essentially it's like cooking it. You know what I'm saying? So everything's like, you can't get that natural starch that you get from that slow, dry pasta where you use the brass dye, where you have the texture. You know, it looks white and it's. It's almost looks like kind of hairy, you know what I'm saying?

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

That's the good. Because that's gonna grab everything. Anything that you're cooking with that pasta. This is gonna soak it all up.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. The only, the only Italian restaurant in Los Angeles that I felt even was like, closer, like in the ballpark with you guys, the way you do things in sharp. Angelini Osteria, the original one, quite sharp. They're, they're, they're quite good. But you guys also have the vibe. And it's like the. The only restaurants I think people would maybe compare to Bellotto's vibe wise, like Dantana's Classic old. But the food at Dantana's is not even, like, it's not even close.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

You know, like, I just get the steak at Dantana's and I'm not gonna say anything else. I do, you know, I'm not gonna say anything else. But, like, for LA to even be close, it'd have to put the food from Angelini Osteria inside of Dantana's, make it bigger, and then park you in the back room. Do you know what I mean? Like, LA just doesn't have that place where it's like, oh, like, if you're a guy, like, that's where you're going. You know what I mean? They have a lot of places that front. And like, Musso and Frank's is good, but then also Musso and Frank's is, you know, like, people have their complaints about their steak. I like Musso's, but for that type of food, I just didn't do it much. In la. I would eat Persian food. I would go eat Japanese food on Sawtel. We'd go eat Chinese food in the sgv. And then, like, I'd go to the Sunset Tower for service, you know, Sunset.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Amazing.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. I love this.

[Emilio Vitolo]

In Cali, I was. I stay at the Sunset.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

I feel like a princess there.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's so nice. And then they got the jazz and the piano downstairs. Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, my God. Daytime, you go to the Polo Lounge. It's like, there's only so many places in LA, because. Oh, Michael's in Santa Monica, I would say.

[Unknown]

Oh, I love Michael.

[Chris Gethard]

You would love this. Next time you go to la, I'll give you a couple of. Because it's like, there's very few people that do service the way you do. And then the food is there as well.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Michael's of Santa Monica is special. Great art collection, too.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Great art collection.

[Unknown]

It will blow you away.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Really?

[Unknown]

Yeah. I was, like, fanning out over the art. I was like, I can't believe you.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Have this on the wall, artist.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, oh, Egan Shield. Yeah. Yeah.

[Unknown]

He has, like, originals. My favorite artists of all time. So I was there, and I was just like. He was like, you should go look at the art.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. I peeped it into bathrooms. I was like, yo, yo. He got Egan's.

[Unknown]

Like, I believe Michael's wife is an art collector. Art dealer. So. Yeah. They just have, like, the most incredible space. It's really special there. You would love it.

[Chris Gethard]

It rivals. Ciao. I think Chow's art collection is probably worth more. He's got, you know, you got Basquiat. He got a lot of, like, the big. But, bro, Michaels is, like, really tasteful, super fly. Like, I. I just think you love the restaurant. Like, wear your seven best watches and go.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I try not to wear my watches when I go, like, abroad, you know, turf over here. Like, I could handle myself.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know?

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know, for sure, in the boroughs, I'm good. But, you know, I'm like, yo, don't be stupid. You know what I'm saying? Like, I. I don't like going to. I travel with Europe and like, that with, like, a expensive piece. You know what I'm saying?

[Unknown]

Daily driver.

[Emilio Vitolo]

When you're traveling, I'll be wearing a swatch.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. The fake Big Bang.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. Out of here, bro. I'm like, yo, what. What's the point, you know, if that. You can only lose because, you know, the. Are gonna see you the second you get off that plane. They're like. They're already dialing in. They're like, yo, this guy got this. This.

[Chris Gethard]

And that is where New Yorkers get got.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

You know?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, that's.

[Chris Gethard]

It's. It's a bad thing. You're very Smart.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Well, that. Yo. They do that in, you know, in Italy too. You know, I'm sorry, it happens in a lot of countries. But, you know, I know that, you know, the second whoever the gets off that plane, he's already tapped in. They know exactly what hotel he's staying at. Second A walks away. Yeah, that place is getting robbed.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, you're smart. You're very smart.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You're very smart.

[Chris Gethard]

We're quite careful about where we were eating out in L. A, you know, because we know a few people that got. Got in L. A. It's like a real thing.

[Unknown]

People. Yeah, people were getting robbed for their watches, like at lunch, during the day, like on restaurants off of Rodeo, like places that you would think you're relatively fine, but.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, there were two shootouts in our backyard, but I had two Dobermans, so it was like wherever I went, it was like the neighbors were all getting robbed around. When we moved to Bel Air, neighbor all got robbed around us, but we had two big ass Dobermans jumping into that.

[Unknown]

Literally, every house on the block got robbed and we didn't. And I remember one night he was traveling and I had our son. He was young still, like, maybe, I don't know, eight or nine months.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Okay.

[Unknown]

And we were on the phone and I just put him down to sleep, and I'm like looking out the window and I'm like, some guy is jumping in our backyard right now to rob our house. And then dog just came out.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh.

[Unknown]

And that was it.

[Chris Gethard]

His name was Mr. Ch.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Mr. Ch.

[Unknown]

I literally, his name was Mr. Chow.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I was like, great name for it.

[Unknown]

I was like, dude, we're getting robbed. And then Mr. Child was like, nope.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, we ever get another dog. Bolato is a good name for a dog, bro.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, I like Mr. Chow better.

[Chris Gethard]

Mr. Chow is a phenomenal name. Yeah, I like naming dogs after restaurants. It's pretty good. It's pretty good, man.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Well, I mean, yeah, a dog like that take a big ass fucking chunk out of your ass for sure.

[Chris Gethard]

Yo, he bit me once because I was keeping him away from fighting another dog. And he got so frustrated, he bit me in the leg and was like, my bad.

[Unknown]

Bad.

[Chris Gethard]

He immediately bit me and was just like, my bad. What are we doing?

[Emilio Vitolo]

I had to give my dog to my mother, man. I have King Corso.

[Chris Gethard]

Did your mom bite the dog?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh, yeah, my mother, she probably.

[Chris Gethard]

Has.

[Emilio Vitolo]

A little bit more vicious than the dog, but, yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

No. So you gave it to your mom?

[Emilio Vitolo]

No, because, you know, it's just like, you know you guys have kids?

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

So you. You know how it is. Like, I tried everything in my power to. To keep the dog. And I'll never forget this. I brought the blanket back, and, you know, I put it in his bed. And, you know, everyone's like, yo, got to get the scent. I'm like, fine. We bring the baby home. And this dude is like, he's not having it. He's the nicest dog ever. Like, very protective. And I remember just trying to go to the bathroom real quick, and I left the door open, and this was, like, he was, like, crawling like he was hunting, bro. And my kid was in the crib, and I lost my. I, Like, I started screaming at him, and. Because I knew he was in hunter mode.

[Chris Gethard]

You know what I'm saying?

[Emilio Vitolo]

The hair on his back was all standing up, and. And I was like, yo, this. Like, he's gonna try and eat my kid.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

What the.

[Unknown]

Well, that's what they do. You know what I mean? It's like, they're smart, and they know that there' this other person here now that's, like, taking my spot. So I don't even think it's malicious. Like, they are really nice dogs. I think the only thing that helped us with our dog was he had puppies. So we had two, and they had puppies while I was pregnant. So me and our dog got pregnant, like, the same time, and then she had her puppies, and then our Mr. Chow became a dad.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And then he was like. I don't know. It was like he, like, he, like, became a dad. Like, I think he thought also, like, our son was his son. Like, he loved him.

[Chris Gethard]

I really missed his dog. We had to give him back to the breed. He lives on a ranch, so he's happy now. I was like, but we move when we move from Bel Air to here. He used to have a half acre to run and guard, living the time of his life. But when we moved to the city, he's so protective of our son that he ended up biting me one day. He ended up biting a lady's jacket in the lobby. And anyone that came close, if our son was with us, he was just on it.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

And I just didn't want him put down. I didn't. I didn't want somebody to report him, so I had to send him back. I really missed this dog. Yeah.

[Unknown]

Like, I meant he just wasn't a city dog. It's hard when you have your dog living with so much space and freedom, and then, like, he's never Been in an elevator.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And then all of a sudden he was in an elevator with people he's never met. He felt. I think he just felt very scared and on guard and he started lashing out, even though he was like the sweetest little.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I know it's world, you know, life now. You know me like my mother's at home by herself in the. In the house. You know what I'm saying? So for my mother now, it's like she don't got to worry about anybody trying to with her. You know what I'm saying? Like, she got a big ass, 140 pound.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

King Corso in the backyard that will gladly eat a waiting for that. Yeah, please like y' all with me and find out. But it now she has like a little companion.

[Chris Gethard]

It's actually perfect for them. Like, Like a security dog is great for a single mom. It's great for single people, you know, like, and I love the personality of security dogs, to be honest.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

But you just have to have your life set up around it. Like, 25 of my life was walking and taking care of that dog, you.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Know, It's a lot of work, man. Yeah, it is a lot of work.

[Chris Gethard]

And thankfully now like that time I spend with my wife and my son and that's where my time should go right now.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Instead of like training a security.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Exactly, exactly.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You don't have any kids in the mix. It's like, yo, it like, why not?

[Unknown]

Well, when it was just us and the two dogs, it was. I mean, living in. We lived right near a hike. We had them out every single day.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And then your life changes and you just can't.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And you're like, yeah, I got a kid now, so that dog. Yeah.

[Unknown]

I got home from the hospital and I was like, get them away from me.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Like, I don't want the dogs.

[Unknown]

I was just like in full nest. Like, they cannot touch my baby.

[Emilio Vitolo]

That's right. Yeah. My fiance Sammy, she was like, like, she was like, get the dog out of the house. That's right. I don't even want him anywhere near this baby. And you know, I'm vouching for the dog. I'm like, yo, we could all be a family. Like, this will be fine.

[Chris Gethard]

How was that? I feel like the guy. Because, you know, also because when your wife comes home and she's pregnant, she's with the kid. Like that.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

And I felt left out. So I was just with the dog. Like, I would tell Mr. Chow everything.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh, yeah. I'm chilling with Him. I'm like, yo, we're. No, he's gonna be fine. Everything's gonna be fine. And then we have one instance where I was eating in the kitchen and I dropped a piece of. A piece of like a burger on the floor. This had, like, crazy food aggression. Oh, he never had it with me, but I used to let my mother babysit him every once in a while a dog sit him, and she used to feed him, like, raw steak and like that. And he got spoiled, so he knew I would try and take it away. And when I went to go grab it, bit the out of my hand.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And then he bit my girl too. And she's like, the dog's gotta go.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And I was like, all right. She's, you know, I'm trying to fight with her. And then she's like, you're gonna pick a dog over our kid?

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And I was like, all right. I can't, you know. Yeah.

[Unknown]

I lost that battle with large breed dogs. Like, it's just hard. It's. It's truly like having a kid.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Because they need so much time and care and like, everything. It's like, like we would see homies when he would. When we were in la, he would go to the boxing gym all the time, and there'd be so many guys, like boxers or whatever, and they had these dogs, like, dialed these huge. And I'm like, that's their full time job, though. Like, they're in the gym and then the dog never leaves them and they're like, it's a full time job.

[Chris Gethard]

Those boxes in the gym was never getting married.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, right.

[Chris Gethard]

Those guys were never getting married.

[Emilio Vitolo]

He's gonna die with that dog right by his side. You know, my dog put two, two.

[Chris Gethard]

Holes in my calf and I was like, no, he cool.

[Unknown]

He cooled, like, still scarred. Like, it was a up bite.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh, my God. But you get unconditional love from the dogs, man.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's like a beautiful thing. Like, I love them. They. They get excited to see you every single time you open that door. Which is like the coolest thing. Yeah. No. Well, yeah, now. Now it's different. Yeah. That's how I feel about. About my daughter too. You know, everything's like, dad, dad now. You know, in the beginning of his mama and I thought the first word out of her mouth would. Would be dad. That everyone says our son went dada. Oh, really?

[Unknown]

Yeah. Broke my heart.

[Chris Gethard]

I was like.

[Unknown]

I was like, who?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Ours was mama. And I was, damn.

[Chris Gethard]

You were really absent.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, man, you get me? Yeah. Sammy gonna look at this and be like, yeah, I told you, you're never around.

[Chris Gethard]

No, I.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Too much.

[Unknown]

I was going to say when our son said dada, I was like, who?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, you. Like, you, motherfucker pushed you out of my body.

[Unknown]

I was like, yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

No, when I popped by the speakeasy and talked to you, I really related. I was like, yo, Emilio was like, very similar type. Dad is like, I was raised, like, once you're a dad and you have a family, your first priority, go make money and make sure the family is good. Like, that is my responsibility, that no one should want for anything. And I stress about it. I never used to stress about money. I would. I. I just made it. You know what I mean?

[Emilio Vitolo]

Exactly.

[Chris Gethard]

Now I stress because I'm like this and this and this.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's a lot of responsibility, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's like, yeah, you know, I'm sure you. You at home taking care of the kid all the time. Somebody's got to be out there making the dollars, you know, and investing and figuring out, you know.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. But then what I realized was, like, my dad. I was doing the same shit my dad did, which was like. Like, go in the other room, stress, think about it, and just work till like, 2:00am yeah. And then I realized, like, my son, I started. When I would do bedtime, he'd be like, no, Dada. No, I want Mama. Like, he wanted his mom. And I was like, oh. Like, what is going on? And then I noticed that when I this only happened a few months ago, I was just like, all right, I'm stopping work at, like, 7:00'. Clock. Like, work has to end at 7. And like, in the morning, I shouldn't be starting work till like, 8 o', clock, right? So I go 8 to 7. I will work those 11 hours. But at 7, I play with him. And now over the last two weeks, he's like, he wants me to do bedtime. And I'm like, this is interesting, man. Like, there is a requisite amount of time you got to spend with that kid. And I don't mean to get anybody in trouble because I. Oh, no. My kid was the one being like, no, Dada.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I got the same shit, you know, saying Mama saying that, that is one thing, but when hits the fan, it's like, mama. But now, now that I've been a little. A lot more present. Now if my daughter falls or something, she's like, dad. Yeah. Then, you know, I pick her out like, oh, what happened? Where's the boo boo? And then I, you know, I like, kiss her leg or if she fell on the floor, kiss her elbow. I'm like, is that better? And then she goes, yes. And then that's it.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Because I want him to be able to count on me, too. And it's. It's time spent is all they know. It's like being. It's like being on parole, you know, Just like you need the amount of time spent.

[Unknown]

That is. The only thing they want is just like. Like, they want you to just be there with them.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's so crazy because, you know, like, growing up, my father was never around, and I hated that motherfucker's guts. I could not stand him because for me, it was like, you know, you got basketball games and baseball games, and he would be the only father that never showed up. Up. And I'd always be so mad at him. And then, you know, the second I had a kid, I'm talking to my father about everything that's going on and how I'm getting heat from, you know, my fiance and how she's saying that I'm not present. I'm like, yo, I'm busting my ass working for my family. Like, this is, like, an important. Like, I'm doing this for you guys. Like, I'm od, like, working. I'm putting myself in a very stressful state.

[Chris Gethard]

But they. What they want is just to hang out with you.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Exactly, exactly. And I was like, yo, I remember complaining. My father. My father was like, yeah, you think it's easy? He's like, I did that with three of you guys. He goes, you don't think I'd much rather be at home hanging out and fucking hanging out with you guys rather than being at fucking work? And I was like. I had a moment of, like, reflection. I was like, holy. Like, I was a dick.

[Chris Gethard]

And I'm realizing now is I felt the same way as you. My dad was always the one dad that wasn't at my games, wasn't at my practices.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

And I'm realizing, like, I could make money and make them super comfortable and buy the best gifts, but the thing that's most valuable is just being present. Yeah, that's it, man.

[Emilio Vitolo]

That's the thing is weird because it's like, you got fathers out there that are like fathers and, like, homies, like friends, and then you got fathers that are providers.

[Unknown]

Like, my father and a provider are not the same thing.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, no, it's completely fucking different because my father, his. His way of showing love is by fucking. Was like, paying for shit and making sure everything's handled. I put a roof over your head and all this shit.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But, you know, like, I don't know. Would I have much rather have the emotional father that was, like, have my best friend? I don't know. I feel like I wouldn't be the same person that I'm in that I am today if it was for that. You know what I'm saying?

[Chris Gethard]

You wouldn't be you.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, it's tough love. You need that shit. Because that's what gave me the drive in my life, is just like not having the motherfucker around all the time. That's why I got in the restaurant business. You know, in the beginning, and I thought about it, I was like, yo, I've never seen this motherfucker. He was never around. Like, maybe I should fucking give this shit a shot and see where the fuck it goes, you know? Maybe we rekindle and see where the fuck his head's at now.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And we fight every day, so it's great.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Even after everything, though, it's really funny, is that I. I think that I. For all the things that I've accomplished, you've accomplished, we've all accomplished. It's just like, I think I would rather have the relationship with my parents, because I still don't have that. And even though I wrote this book that's very much about them, and then there's a show honoring our family and where we're from, I still have just this terrible relationship with my parents that is the bane of my existence. It's really cool for me to see you work with your pops. Like, that's a beautiful thing, man, because y' all are working it out.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Well, I mean, you know, I used to fight with him about a lot of. And then I realized, like, that's the wrong approach. You know, like, me jumping in there was just kind of like, yo, let me handle this. My place, now. That was the wrong approach, you know, that was the wrong way to go about it, I realized. And trying to argue with him about a lot of shit, I'm like, wait, hold on a second. I'm like, how the fuck would I feel if this was the flip side? I'm like, wait, hold on. All right, so you built a restaurant. Now you have this taking the reins on the. Now your relevance, like, becomes, like, lower, you know? Like, you stroke the eagle a little bit, you know? So then I started thinking about it. I was like, wait, hold on. Who the am I to say anything to this? Because I wouldn't be in the position I'm in today if it wasn't for him. So I started thinking about it in a way where it's just like, even if I disagree with you, I'm gonna fucking do what you want me to do. I'm do what you say to do. And, you know, when he's not around anymore, then. Then I'll be able to call the shots 100% on my own. But at the end of the day, like, that's his fucking place regardless. Yeah. He built it. It's his fucking place.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know, So I gotta fucking respect that. So the second I came into terms with that and realized, like, that's the way it fucking goes, whatever he says goes. We've been fucking golden. Because now I just ask him, and I think he needs that shit. You know what I'm saying? Like, whatever decision I'm about to make, I go through him first and I get his blessing for it. And I think he. He's like, all right. This knows I'm the guy. Just the respect.

[Chris Gethard]

The respect of, like. Like, you standing on the shoulders of your dad. You know, Like. And I definitely give my dad all the respect for, like, the business and shitty provided. I think I actually. I'm a call him and. Because I just need him to engage the emotional. Like, the emotional. Like, my mom is. I. I can't even.

[Emilio Vitolo]

He's like, yo, my mother, though.

[Chris Gethard]

That'S, like, gonna be years. Years down the road. My father, it's, like, simple. It's that he really wants me to acknowledge that, like, yo, I provided and. And I was being a dad by talk. Doing what we were talking about.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

But I'm like, but, dad, you, like, kind of missed this whole other side. And I think my dad has a lot of issues acknowledging that. You know, he's like, I provided. In my generation, that's all we did. You know, and that was enough. And I'm like, I'm not asking for you to, like, you don't owe me anything.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Just like, for the rest of our lives, maybe, like, engage the emotional side of being a father.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But you know what? I feel like you can't teach an old dog new tricks. Like, they're not wired that way.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

And they're not capable of showing that emotion. Like, my. My father's never said I love you once to me. Never hugged me. You know, it would always be like, you know, put a hand out and shake my hand with it. How you doing, pal? Hey, buddy. What's going on? You know, like, shake my hand. I watch everybody else, you know, like, you know, hugging their kids and like that. I'm like, yo, is this something wrong with me?

[Chris Gethard]

Like, what the.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, this not giving me any emotion whatsoever, you know, But I grew up. Up, you know, tough in that way, because I. I didn't give a.

[Chris Gethard]

About it.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I. I felt like I didn't need that.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But I actually did need it.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Big problem child, you know, growing up.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah. When you say you got in trouble and did. I did the same thing, you know, like, I had multiple charges by the time I was 19 years old, you know, and it was because I'm just like, yo, what am I doing here? My parents don't even like me, you know, so it's.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's.

[Chris Gethard]

It's tough.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. It's like, almost like trying to get that. That, like, whatever attention you could get, even if it's negative.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know, then at least you're getting attention.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Even if you get into the belt or whatever the it is, you're like, at least he recognized me.

[Chris Gethard]

He's in the house with a belt.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. You. Oh, my God. Catholic school crazy. I got the ruler all the time at Catholics.

[Unknown]

Yeah, me too.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Oh, my God.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

What a nightmare that was.

[Unknown]

I know the nuns. We talk about this all the time. We're like, are we gonna go private or public with our son? And we're just like, you know.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

What are you thinking Back on our experience.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know what? They just shut down the school that. That. That I went to. You know, I went to Our lady of Pompeii on Blue Carmine street, and they. They shut it down and they turned it into, like, a charter school or some like that.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But, you know, I wanted. I wanted my kids to go to. To a Catholic school like me and, you know, like, have that whole family tree thing going, you know, like. Oh, yeah, well, your uncle went here, and your. Your other uncle went here. Your father went there.

[Unknown]

Totally.

[Emilio Vitolo]

They could see, like, a little picture of me, like. No. From one of the graduating classes where they used to put us all in uniform and like that. But it's not there anymore, man.

[Unknown]

I know. That's crazy.

[Emilio Vitolo]

It's tough because there's a lot of. That's going on in the world right now, and I just like. Like, I feel like our kids are so innocent. Yeah. I don't want them exposed to. And I'm just like. It's so up, man. I just, like. I wish I could shelter My kid.

[Unknown]

I know. I, like, wish I could homeschool, but then I'm like, that's also not great. Like, you have to let your kid go and live their life and have experiences, but at the same time, it is tough. I want to literally keep him inside.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I'm. I'm scared. I'm like, I don't know what the I'm gonna do. And then, yeah, Sammy was like, I could homeschool her. And I'm like, I'm think that, like, maybe that may not be such a bad idea, because I. I know a couple of homies of mine who, like, in the film industry, they were homeschooled. Really nice dudes, like, grew up very respectful and like that. But, you know, they don't get that.

[Unknown]

Well, there's a camaraderie.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah. You learn through the social.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, they're a little bit too innocent. And then, you know, it's just like, I don't. I don't want my daughter to go through that.

[Unknown]

Totally.

[Emilio Vitolo]

So I don't know where the.

[Unknown]

Is the balance here, but it's scary. I mean, I think about it all the time. Time same. I, like, heavily considered homeschooling, but it's the same. You're like, I want you to do sports and make friends and live your life the way that you should. And.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I know. It's just.

[Unknown]

It's really crazy.

[Chris Gethard]

I think it's about trust. It's just like that. The lessons the kid is getting from you.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

You gotta trust that your son or daughter is gonna go to school and implement that and be okay. Like, life is tough, man. Life's hard for me. You hurt. Like, it's hard for everybody. There's no way it's not going to be hard for our kids.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Of course.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, totally. Yeah. But, yo, before. Before we let you go, do you want to talk about what you're doing in entertainment? Because that. It's pretty cool. Like, you're gonna do a pod. Oh, yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah. So. So I have a couple of things. I mean, I just opened up, like, a production company, right. So it's called Little Italy Productions. And I have two films that I'm producing right now or helping produce. So one is called Apophenias with a buddy of mine, this. This kid Michael d'. Angelo. Very talented kid. And then the other one is Lake George. So I'm trying to help my. My homie Hamid with that. His name's Hamid Castro. He actually lives in my building. I live at 1 Manhattan Square.

[Chris Gethard]

Oh, word?

[Emilio Vitolo]

But, yeah, his Is like old New York, bro.

[Chris Gethard]

We almost moved into that building.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Really?

[Chris Gethard]

Like in Two Bridges.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yes.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We almost moved there, so.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, I live in that building. So he's in that building, too. But, yeah, he. He popped off with this film called Lake George, and I'm helping him produce that. And then I got two scripts that I have that I've been sitting on for a while that I want to get done. One's about my grandmother, and then the other one's about father, son, relationship, growing up in the restaurant business. So it's like my life story, you know, into. It's a drama.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know, I don't want to.

[Chris Gethard]

Don't give it away.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I don't want to give it up, but. Yeah. And then I got to speak easy, and then the. The podcast thing I want to do is all about, like, you know, watches and like that.

[Unknown]

That'll be fun.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Yeah, I think it'd be cool. I, I, you know, I'm just. I'm trying to figure out.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Emilio Vitolo]

You know, projects to start with.

[Chris Gethard]

That's a lot. You good? You got something on the table.

[Emilio Vitolo]

But, you know, for me, it's just like, I like creating, like, a. Like a little goal list, and then I check it off once I complete it, and it' lot of, you know, staying in active instead of doing the same all the time and being for sure, like a animal at the. At the restaurant. Being there six or seven days a week is a little tough, you know?

[Chris Gethard]

You know, since I met you from that competition show, I was just like, yo, he's got to do something because he's got a personality. It's hilarious. You have, like, a rare energy. So I'm excited that you're stepping into the entertainment stuff.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Thank you very much.

[Chris Gethard]

Yeah, thank you, bro. Thank you for coming on the show.

[Emilio Vitolo]

My pleasure, man. Thank you for having me.

[Chris Gethard]

Amazing.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Thank you so much. Thank you, guys for having me.

[Chris Gethard]

Me.

[Emilio Vitolo]

Hi, I'm Chris Gethard, and I'm very excited to tell you about Beautiful Anonymous, a podcast where I talk to random people on the phone. I tweet out a phone number. Thousands of people try to call, talk to one of them. They stay anonymous. I can't hang up. That's all the rules. I never know what's gonna happen. We get serious ones. I've talked with meth dealers on their way to prison. I've talked to people who survived mass shootings, Crazy, funny ones. I talked to a guy with a goose slap, somebody who dresses up as.

[Chris Gethard]

A pirate on the weekends.

[Emilio Vitolo]

I never know what's gonna happen. It's a great show. Subscribe today. Beautiful Anonymous.