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- [00:00]
A
All right, welcome back, Canal Street Dreams. I'm wearing sunglasses today because one of my eyes keeps twitching and I don't like thinking about my eye twitching when we're doing the pod. But we got a special 1v1 episode today with. With the lovely Natasha. And we wanted to talk about the kind of themes from this film that we watched this weekend, the Materialists. I feel like I should give you the floor to present. Present the themes from this wonderful film.
- [00:33]
B
Okay, well, if you haven't seen the film and you want to see the film, spoiler alert. So don't watch this episode. Like maybe watch it and then watch this episode because we're gonna just destroy the entire plot for you. Yeah, but yeah, we watched it. I feel like we have very different opinions. But also you're a man and I'm a woman, so I think we see things differently.
- [00:55]
A
I don't know. I don't know. We haven't talked about it yet. We've actually saved the conversation. But like, the conflict in the film is really that there is a woman played by Dakota Johnson, who is a matchmaker who was previously in love with the guy that plays Captain America, Chris Evans. Chris Evans. Okay, so she used to be in a relationship with Chris Evans, Loves Chris Evans. Chris Evans in this film is a struggling actor slash cater waiter. And Dakota Johnson ends up getting a job as a matchmaker. Is around wealthy people paying for matchmaking services constantly. Constantly. Kind of like ranking people's value in the single dating scene. And she happens upon a character played by Pedro Pascal, who is of extremely wealthy man at a wedding who takes a liking to her. So she has a conundrum.
- [01:56]
B
Yes. At this wedding, she runs into her ex boyfriend, of course, Mr. Brokey, where she meets Mr. Big. So she's faced. Well, she's really not faced with anything because there's no one's. She's not locked into any type of relationship here. She's just kind of looking at her past and she's looking at somebody who could be a partner for her in the future and figuring out who she is along the way. And like, what's important to her, I think, is her character's journey is what really is important to me. Is it just true love that you feel in your bones that you're like, I can't be without this person? Or is she doing the mental math that she does for her clients as a matchmaker, finding all the reasons to why on paper a life with somebody looks good.
- [02:48]
A
Yeah. And. And then that. That is kind of the Synopsis of the film. And I feel like we can actually talk about this. You. We. We can talk about this without getting into the details of the film. That's the setup. That's like, first 20 minutes. So I will actually rescind what Natasha said. You can listen to this episode. It will not spoil the film because we're gonna talk about the conundrum, which is like, a f. This is this. I enjoyed the film. My one issue with the film is that I think it creates a false binary, but you kind of needed it for the film in that the choice that Dakota Johnson's character faces is, okay, date a rich guy who I'm not interested in, or date a broke guy that I loved at one point and may love again in the future. But we're going to accept the premise. And, like, you had a lot of thoughts about this.
- [03:41]
B
Well, I agree. I think it's. I'm, like, it is a false binary. Both options are bad. There's a third option to just, like, continue being single and living your life, and then maybe you meet somebody who you love right now who isn't the brokest guy in the world, not the richest guy in the world. Maybe just a better option for you altogether, like, the movie in itself. And obviously it's a movie and, like, that's, you know, some people's real life, maybe. But, yeah, to just be, like, rich guy I kind of hate, or really broke guy that I'm in love with. But. And genuinely in the movie, I think she says, like, I'm going to hate my life with you. Like, I'm going to be miserable. We're going to be miserable. Like, I don't want to fight over $20. Like, I genuinely like the thought of being with you repulses me, but I'm in love with you. Like, that's just not a good option. Like, you should walk away from both is how I feel in the thing.
- [04:32]
A
That I related to. And what I found interesting about the film was a lot of the pocket scenes and ancillary characters who were not finding love for one reason or another. The kind of interpretation of, like, people's value, like, based on height, based on looks, based on money, all of those things. And I do feel that the conflicts and things that arose in Dakota Johnson's relationship with the Chris Evans character. Sometimes you can't afford to date somebody. Like, we would joke, like men between each other. We joke to each other, like, locker room shit. Saying the nastiest things to each other. Like, yo, you can't afford her dog. Like, we would say things like that to each other to mess with each other. And I think this film brought a lot of that to the surface. Cause when you're first dating and it's just like casual sex and dinners and things like that, money's not as important. Yeah. Of course, when you start to build a unit and you're together, money is a thing that really is important to address in a relationship. I don't think there's one answer from my pov, but, like, you know, I'd love to hear what you think.
- [05:49]
B
Yeah. I mean, I think when you enter into a serious relationship, not a fling, not something that's casual, but in a serious relationship, especially if you're living with somebody and the plan is to build a life together over the course of many years, I don't think how much money you have matters. But I think that the two people have the same idea of what they want their lifestyle to be matters. Because if you have one person who is a sp. Whatever you're at this point financially now, whatever this is. But if you have one person who's aspiring to go here and one person who's okay here, not going to work.
- [06:28]
A
Yeah.
- [06:29]
B
So it's just, you have to be aligned in what you want your life to look like and what sacrifices you're willing to make and what sacrifices you're not willing to make in life. And, like, that's kind of how you can figure that out.
- [06:40]
A
Yeah. And a lot of these things come, I think, money, for me, at least in a relationship, it's like an issue that's has equal weight to, like, culturally. How would you like to live? For instance, like, I'm Chinese, you're Greek. There's certain things with our child rearing where I'm like, yo, it's important that Senna speaks Chinese.
- [06:59]
B
Yeah.
- [07:00]
A
Right. And you have to say those things up front and have a partner who's like, I'm cool. Supporting that and making sure, you know, my son spends the time to go learn to speak Chinese, you know, and, like, I have other Asian friends who, you know, beyond just language. They're like, we want to have our home structured and arranged in a way that is significantly more Asian cultural than, say, American cultural. There's Greek things we want to do, like get him baptized and cut his hair. Like, I think those are all things that create conflict once you're serious. And money is underneath a lot of it.
- [07:41]
B
Absolutely.
- [07:42]
A
Because even, like, the neighborhood you choose to live in is a big deal in a relationship.
- [07:47]
B
Absolutely. I Think even to what you're saying. Just we can use this as an example in our own personal lives. It's like, yes, so se our son speaking Mandarin is very important to you. The. So the fact that we're able to afford to send him to a very private, very small, whatever you want to call it, they call it pre prek. It's essentially daycare where they speak only Mandarin to the kids is a huge privilege. It's not affordable. Like I, when I saw the bill, I was like, I was shook. I was shook to my core. I genuinely was like, no, no one told me, like, no one told me.
- [08:22]
A
Vacation so that he learns Mandarin, you know.
- [08:24]
B
But we are very privileged and we can afford that. So it's not a situation where now you're stressed because I don't speak Mandarin and it's all on you. And now you have to be doing all this mental math thinking, oh my God, am I spending enough time speaking Mandarin to him? I spoke English. Like, it's gonna fuck him up. Like the burden's off of us now.
- [08:42]
A
We've outsourced it. We had the money to outsource that burden.
- [08:46]
B
So we're not gonna fight over it anymore. But if we didn't have the money, we'd probably be fighting over it. Cause you'd be like, you're not teaching him how to speak Mandarin. And I'd be like, you speak Mandarin and you'd be like, I'm working. Like it would just devolve something that it doesn't need to. So yes, and then I will, and I will just say, I think the discourse on the Internet that I see generally just in this day and age where we're all on the Internet and we're all exposed to these extravagant lifestyles that I think a lot of people think are real. I think a lot of, there's a lot of. With a fake Birkin that maybe a little young impressionable tween is seeing online, thinking this is all real lifestyles. Like her man is. She's a stay at home girlfriend, her man's paying for everything. And they're going here and they're going there and they live in this beautiful apartment and they drive these cars. I think now has like warped a lot of women into like thinking there's a standard and that you really can't even entertain somebody who couldn't provide that for you. I do think that there's a large group of women who maybe think that.
- [09:50]
A
Yeah. And I think it's very frustrating for men in a very Difficult economy to make ends meet. If you're dating someone who is keeping up with the Joneses, like, we have. We have. We have somebody close to us who, like, after I proposed to you and got you a couple pieces of jewelry, I think their significant other, like, had something to say.
- [10:13]
B
Oh, my God. Yes.
- [10:14]
A
Okay.
- [10:15]
B
Sorry. I was doing mental gymnastics. I was like, who are you talking about? Yeah, no, for sure. And they're in. And I do think that it's, like, you know, ridiculous, because everybody. I don't think that that at the core, it's like, what matters, because in. Essentially, what we're talking about is this movie, right? Where it's like, true love or a really amazing life. It's not always that, but you can't go out into the world expecting something. Expecting and feeling entitled to a level of luxury or treatment from a partner when it's just not what they got. Do you know what I mean? You kind of have to really realistically look at things and say, okay, what is important to me? Is it that I'm with a partner who sees me and loves me and cares about me, or am I just chasing a lifestyle in just any. Any. The first person who comes and gives it to me, I'm just. That's cool. Sign me up.
- [11:15]
A
Yeah. Everyone's wants and needs, like, Maslow's pyramid of needs, is. Is just different. Right. Like, some people really need a lot financially, and those things need to be taken care of before they can even reach, like, what they believe in their mind to be.
- [11:29]
B
Romance, you know, it's kind of hilarious. I kind of feel that way about myself.
- [11:34]
A
Yeah.
- [11:35]
B
Like, I do. I just. To keep it so real, like, I. I genuinely do feel a level of comfort before I can, like, genuinely, like, relax and be my true self. But I do think that that's the privilege of money. It's like you can actually relax and then really be yourself and figure out materially, like, what. Who you are.
- [11:58]
A
Yeah. I. In my dating history, I would say you're in the top 3 of people who need stuff.
- [12:05]
B
Yeah.
- [12:05]
A
Like, you need a significant amount of stuff.
- [12:08]
B
Yeah.
- [12:09]
A
What I will say, giving you credit is, like, since we've had Senna, I think you put our son above yourself and everything else. And, I mean, look, times have been pretty hard for everyone in Hollywood since the strike in 2023. Right. So since I would say 2023, we've had to budget a lot more. Like, we haven't gone on trips in a while. You know, like, there's a lot of things we Used to do that. We just don't do anymore. We are not. We're not copying watches. Right? We're not copying that many Johns. It's. Everyone has to be smarter now. And I did feel from 2023 till about, like, top of 2024, I felt like I needed to, like, maintain this lifestyle for you that, like, the guy that you met and the things I could provide. And I. I will say straight out, it created a lot of stress for me.
- [13:08]
B
Yeah.
- [13:08]
A
There was definitely a lot of days where I feel like we fought because I felt like I wasn't able to provide the things that you need or wanted. And when you would get frustrated and make offhand comments, my. My eject thing was just like, yo, just like, go find another dude. And you were like, but I'm pregnant with our kid. You know what I mean? And I'm like, fair. You know, fair. I would, but.
- [13:34]
B
No, I'm kidding. I wouldn't.
- [13:36]
A
Yeah. And I do feel like there's. When you came into the relationship, I could provide a lot and you needed a lot. And as it's grown, it has been really cool to see both of us mature. And I think a year ago, we would not have been able to watch the Materialist together. No, it would have been extremely triggering.
- [13:55]
B
We would have been beefing, for sure.
- [13:57]
A
We watched it and we were able to, like, laugh and enjoy it and talk and, like, cuddle and everything after, because we got past those things in our relationship.
- [14:07]
B
For sure. We did. But we also have had those conversations of what is important to us financially and now. And like, listen, like, when I met you, I wasn't. I was a leisure girl. I wasn't working, I wasn't aspiring for job. And now I work all the time.
- [14:27]
A
Gave you apartments on, like, both coasts. You know, like, you had. You had housing taken care of.
- [14:32]
B
Yeah. And now I'm like, okay, cool. Whatever I need to do, I do in our, you know, realm of business. And I will always show up and do those things, and I enjoy it. And I think we've gotten past the point to where money is a stressful. A stressful topic for us or causes fight. But I will say that when I think of the average couple, I'm like, yeah, I can see why any man who can't provide what he feels, his partner, this man or woman, it doesn't matter. It's like, definitely not gendered. Whatever person feels like, okay, I can't provide this. This person deserves this. Like, I see where the fight could start. It's even Subconsciously, if you. If you don't got it and you're, like, looking around and you're like, I can't do it like that, then little things are going to set you off.
- [15:28]
A
Yeah. And we had fights where I was very honest, where I was like, yo, I cannot afford and do those things we had been doing for a few years.
- [15:38]
B
Yeah.
- [15:39]
A
And I was like, just let me know, because, like, it. I will accept that if I cannot provide those things, then you need to be in another relationship. And you were like, no, that's not what it is. And I think I wanted to talk about this today because I feel like a lot of people are probably going through this shit right now because it's like, finances are very difficult for everybody. And the thing that I had to face as a man was to be able to be vulnerable and say to you, yo, I feel less than me. I feel less than me right now because I cannot give you the things that I want to give you. I cannot take care of you in the way that I pride myself in taking care of you. And I feel less than. I don't feel like the man that I know I am. And I think once I was able to say that, you were able to be like, yo, I love you. Yeah, I, like, love this. There's some shit I need. But, like, yo, I love you.
- [16:37]
B
That was the first time I said I love you, by the way.
- [16:38]
A
Yeah, it was.
- [16:39]
B
It was three years in when he. When he was like, the car declined, and I was like, well, I guess I love you. No, no, I. I think I've made. Okay. I think I made it clear so many times. You did.
- [16:52]
A
Many, many times before, I think. But when we started to fight about money, it was like. It really got to me where I was like, is this gonna work?
- [16:58]
B
Yeah.
- [16:59]
A
Like, wait, like, did I need to be rich to be with her? You know what I'm saying? And, like, then we just got past it.
- [17:05]
B
Yeah. Well, like, it just. Yeah. And it didn't matter how many times I said that that wasn't the case. Like, we could have had millions of conversations where I was like, no, this isn't what I'm talking about. But I think for you to finally, like, get it and for. For you to believe it and feel took time, because I think maybe it was like your insecurity getting in the way of you believing what I was saying. It was like the words that are coming out of my mouth were not hitting because you couldn't. That there. I couldn't show you. Besides, Just like, go on that journey with you. Do you know what I mean? It was like enduring, like, troubled times together that I think made you believe that I was like, I do actually love you. And it's not about money or lifestyle or any of that shit.
- [17:54]
A
And I'll be honest, people always blame women. I will say a lot of this shit was me because I take pride in breaking bread. Like, I see that as my responsibility, you know, like, even if I had dated people with an income or whatever, like, for the most part, besides a couple of people that insisted on, like, splitting rents and things, I was like, I just, I got this. I like being like, I got this because my dad had always got it. And I was just like, I' ma got this. But, like, when I was not able to do all the things I take pride in, I think there was a part of me that almost was like, yo, I don't want you to see me like this. And I don't want you to live like this. Because I'm like, there was. There was easily a year and a half where I was like, fighting to pay bills each month. Yeah, there it was. It was very difficult, but it's like I.
- [18:44]
B
It was difficult, but it's like, hilarious that we're saying this because I'm like, we were in like, a beautiful house and like, our life was fine. I'm like, we had champagne problems, right? Because, like, we.
- [18:55]
A
We were over leveraged because I bought my parents house for sure you.
- [18:58]
B
And like, this is all very real. And like, we were, we were struggling.
- [19:02]
A
For NFL players go bankrupt. You're like, how did it happen? And like, wait, if you're broke, why aren't you, like, on a street with the long stem pipe? It's like, no, you can actually have zero money in the bank account and have stuff.
- [19:13]
B
It's called house poor.
- [19:14]
A
Yeah, we were very house poor.
- [19:16]
B
We bought a couple houses we shouldn't have bought. Yeah.
- [19:18]
A
And I don't want nobody to feel bad for us either. I wanted to talk about this today to try to, like, address, like, the feelings men and women have in relationships when money comes up.
- [19:27]
B
But I do think that there's two types of relationships, and I will say that I've seen them both. I. I was a matchmaker of sorts myself. So I like, very much understand this character. I've seen it all. I've done the mental math. Like, I've had boyfriends that I was like, this is great. I'm like, flying private to this place and having these experiences and whatever. But you're like, do I actually, like, love this person, or is this really fun? And do I like this lifestyle? That's, like, what you have to ask yourself. And there surely are people in the world who are. Have long, healthy marriages who are two people who said, we like this lifestyle together. I like what you bring here. You like what I bring. And, like, we're probably not in love, but we're gonna do it, and then that works and that lasts. Like, there's arranged marriages. It's essentially an arranged marriage, but, like, nobody forced you. You just kind of, like, did it yourself. It's not genuine, true, magnetic love where you're just, like, met somebody and you're like, oh, my God. It's primal. I, like, need this person in my life.
- [20:30]
A
Yeah, there was. It's. It's interesting because you are. I have dated people who, like, needed a lot of stuff, but the reason that they needed stuff was to keep up with the Joneses. Like, at one point, there was a relationship I was in that was very serious, but the person was like, I need to live in West Hollywood because everyone I do business with and for my identity and for, like, who I am, like, that's the neighborhood I want to be in. I need to be in. And I was like, I will never live in West Hollywood. I just won't do it. I was like, I want to live in mid city. And the person was like, dude, mid City, that's hood, you know? I was like, I like to hang out at discount liquors. Like, that's who I am. That's my lifestyle.
- [21:11]
B
You really do like to hang out at discount liquors. Because those were the. We had a birthday party for you, and these random guys came that I've never seen before. And I was like, who are these guys? And he was like, my homies from discount liquors.
- [21:23]
A
And I didn't invite them. They just happened to go to the same bar. And I was like, yo, the homies from discount liquors? Yeah.
- [21:28]
B
And there were. They were the best people at your birthday.
- [21:30]
A
Yeah.
- [21:31]
B
Like, I love everyone else, but they were like. They were hype. Like, they were, like, singing Happy Birthday. I was like, these are some really good friends.
- [21:38]
A
Yeah. That's my thing is, like, I have been privileged at points. I've earned things at points. I've been around. I literally been around the world.
- [21:45]
B
Yeah.
- [21:45]
A
I choose to live in certain pockets. I choose to, like, embed or become a part of certain communities where I'm just like, I like what this community is about.
- [21:54]
B
Yeah, The.
- [21:55]
A
The social Circles and lifestyles I choose a lot of times are based on what I respect. Like, Mid City was a neighborhood, had people I respected, hardworking people, taco trucks, discount liquors. I was just like, I like my neighbors and I like the people here.
- [22:11]
B
Yeah.
- [22:12]
A
I didn't respect. I don't respect West Hollywood. I don't like what's going on over there.
- [22:15]
B
You know, I like, totally like the finer things in life. And I don't even respect West Hollywood.
- [22:22]
A
Yeah. But the difference. I was about to say this. The difference between you and a few of the other people that needed stuff, that I was like when they said it and it came out of their mouths, I was out. I knew I was out.
- [22:34]
B
Yeah.
- [22:34]
A
Because I'm not a Keeping up with the Joe. I will just not ever be in a friendship, relationship, anything with someone who, like, need something because somebody else got it.
- [22:45]
B
Yeah.
- [22:45]
A
You are really interesting and funny to me. And your need for stuff never bothered me. I actually like it. It was only when I couldn't afford it, I got insecure. Is because you like things like a dude. Like a streetwear collector. You're kind of a collector. You like johns. Like, you like construction, you know the history. You follow cars, you follow watches, you know, like old polo. And it was. It's almost like kind of like the people who listen to throwing fits. Like, we can't front. Like, we are in that Venn diagram In a way, 100%, you know, like John's.
- [23:25]
B
I don't know about, like.
- [23:26]
A
You love John. Yeah.
- [23:27]
B
I just don't know about, like, boy stuff. So throwing fits. I'm like, I don't understand about the salvage denim, but, like, I do have a sickness.
- [23:33]
A
You have a double pleated pant. You like khakis. And the thing with you is I got to nerd out and be my, like, dude hoarder self. Because you were into fashion. We were just. We're into it as a hobby.
- [23:46]
B
Yeah, I would say I'm very much into it as a hobby. And the thing I will say about myself is I am absolutely not a Keeping up with the Joneses person. I love the Joneses and I love what they got and I love going over their house. And I'm like, this is beautiful and amazing. I will. I wear the same pair of jeans and I wear the same, like, white T shirt on a day to day basis every single day. And I have a closet full of amazing, like, archival pieces. I have, like, I just don't. And it's like, for me, like, it's Just, that's for me. Like, I don't post my stuff. I don't.
- [24:19]
A
Like, no, I understand from jump. And that's why none of the material things bothered me. Because the intention and the desire to acquire it wasn't material in nature.
- [24:30]
B
Yeah.
- [24:31]
A
It was curiosity.
- [24:32]
B
Yeah.
- [24:33]
A
And curiosity is romantic.
- [24:35]
B
Yeah.
- [24:35]
A
You know, like, you're curious about John's. I'm curious about John. I mean.
- [24:39]
B
But I will also say, like, there is a part of me, and this is just straight up and down, the honest truth about who I am. And, like, we've had this conversation. I've told you this. I'm like, there is just a standard of lifestyle that, like, I'm just not. I'm just, like, cool. Like, times get hard and you got to do what you got to do. But I've told you many times, like, I'm just not comfortable. Like, I just don't. I will always be striving for, like, a certain level of comfort. Like, I don't want to dip into something that I feel is just like. Like, I'm not happy there. Like.
- [25:09]
A
But the funniest thing I'm gonna say to you as a compliment is I have seen you now experience some very uncomfortable periods.
- [25:17]
B
Yeah.
- [25:18]
A
And. Yo, you didn't say a peep.
- [25:20]
B
No, because I'm like, fine. I don't think. I don't think anything in life is linear. And, like, I'm not. I don't need things to be comfortable all the time. But when I think about myself and my life, I'm just like. And this is just what I'm working towards. Right. I'm 31 years old. Like, I have hopefully many years ahead of me. What I'm working towards in my life is I would like a certain type of lifestyle where I take one or two vacations a year. And that's not stressful. And that I get, like, you know, a facial every month or. And that's not stressful. Like, these are the things that I would like to spend my disposable income on, is what I'm saying. And we've talked about that. Like, and those are things that are both important to us. Money. For me, I look at it as convenience. Like, that's where it's important to me, where I would like to be able to have a car. We both align on that. It's simple things like that. It's like, how you want to spend your money, I think, as a couple, that allows you to. When you. You're aligning on that, not fight. So, like, you Know that about me. I want to go on a couple trips. I would like to have a two or three bedroom apartment. I don't need a house in the Hamptons. Not what I'm interested in. I would like to take two trips a year. That's where I would like to put that money instead. So we're now able to. Like, you're not stressed because you're like, oh, my God, I got to buy this house in the Hamptons. This is never going to be happy without it. We know that about each other. And I'm not like. And I'm like, you need, like, $5,000 a month to gamble sports.
- [26:41]
A
Cool. Yeah. Not. No, not a month, but like a season. You know, Season. Whatever.
- [26:45]
B
Whatever it is. But I. But I know that about you. So if I see, like, you're gambling, it doesn't bother me because I'm like, that's your thing. That's like. That's your level of. That's what your convenience money is. You know, like, we're very much. You see me, I see you. You're like, this bitch needs a leather good. I'm like, he needs to do an eight leg parlay.
- [27:04]
A
Yeah. I got to bet on sports. I got to eat good. Like, my thing is, even when I was, like, doing well with Bauhaus, I lived in Stytown with my brother at one point, where the walls were just boxes of sneakers. Like, my house, my living situation can be shit.
- [27:19]
B
I can't.
- [27:20]
A
My experiences need to be fire. Like, I always needed to eat good. I needed fire johns, and I, like, needed to be able to bet and I needed to go on vacation. But since we're in a relationship and we have a kid now, it's flipped because I'm like, you and Senna's needs come before mine. As they should. As they should. If you, a man like, you take care of your family.
- [27:40]
B
And it's.
- [27:42]
A
It's just like, I make sure that the housing is number one. Like, comfortable housing is important. I would say even in our worst time, the housing has always been comfortable.
- [27:51]
B
That's my number. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. I can't. I am a person. I can't be surrounded by ugliness. I can't live crazy like that. Like, even when I moved in with you and you had that room full of shoeboxes, it would keep me up at night, three in the morning, I'd be like, get the fucking shoes out of my house. Like, I can't live like that. I need every Like, I'm so impacted by my surroundings. Like, even. Like, we have a beautiful apartment. We are so fucking privileged. We are so privileged. But even just, like, the shoeboxes in our room, I just. I can't even, like, I like a part of me. There's a part of me.
- [28:31]
A
Yeah.
- [28:31]
B
Where I just have. Like. I think I'm just, like, I just gotta power through it. I just look at it. I just.
- [28:37]
A
Yeah, but the cool thing about you and the thing you did as a partner that I really appreciated is when we dated up front, you were just like, I'm not going to mess around. I need a certain level of comfort in a relationship.
- [28:50]
B
Yeah.
- [28:51]
A
And when we met, I was like, that's not a problem. That level, easy, light, shit happens in life. And that's when we all got tested. And that's when it's like, all right, we all have wants and needs and desires, but then romance comes in. It wasn't just a kid. It's like, once you are in love with someone, you are like, yo, we will get through this together. Then it's not a. Like, you gotta provide for me or whatever. It's like, no, we're now gonna do this together. Yeah.
- [29:18]
B
But our relationship didn't. And, like, our relationship didn't start like that. It wasn't like, we, like, met up and I was like, show me the account. No, I think you can provide this life for me. It was very much like romance. There was.
- [29:30]
A
Dudes were providing, and I was just kind of, like, sliding. I was like, what up?
- [29:34]
B
I was being well provided for.
- [29:35]
A
Yeah. I was like, yo, somebody is already taking care of the bill. This is great, but I'm just eating for free.
- [29:42]
B
Yeah. That was not. That was not. But it was all romance. But that's what I'm saying. It was for us. It was just romance up front. There was no. I don't even think either of us, up until I got pregnant were thinking about, like, what's our life going to be like? Or, what is this? Like, everything else felt like it was just a set for us to hang out in. Nothing was important by that point. Like, I didn't even care. I didn't care about really anything until I got pregnant. And then I was like, okay, a baby is coming in this house. I got to, like, figure out, you know what I mean? Like, what's going on and where's the money coming from and how are we going to afford to have a kid and, you know, whatever. But up until that point, it was just. I think we Were pure romance.
- [30:28]
A
Yeah, no, it was pure romance. But I will also say this, just like men are always complaining about women gold diggers or whatever. Oh, you asked for this. What are you doing?
- [30:36]
B
And I was like, all the comments on our. She's. She hates him. She's with him for his money.
- [30:42]
A
Yeah, I got none anymore. So cool. And then the, the thing for me is too, is like, I've always been like, I will provide. I never am like, yo, what's your job? What are you going to bring? I never ask a shorty for that because. And that is a self interested choice as well. Because I don't want to be pushed around and told what to do in my house. Do you know what I mean? Like, it, it provides a level of like buffer and armor because I grew up with a mom that just pushed my dad around and like, it was constantly. She was just in his ear, up in his ass. And I was like, yo, I want to provide such a nice life so that that person is never on my ass. Like, my mom was with my pops.
- [31:29]
B
That makes sense.
- [31:30]
A
And when the strike in Hollywood happened and everything, I was like, oh my God, this is my nightmare. This is my nightmare. But then I just switched because I was like, you know what now, homie, you're not providing that. That level of comfort and service. So now you are sweeping the floor and you are vacuuming and you are. And I was just like, I'm just doing everything I can. Yeah, I just started doing everything I could.
- [31:51]
B
Yeah.
- [31:52]
A
Because I was like, I can't, I can't outsource this to somebody. I can't afford to outsource it anymore.
- [31:57]
B
Yeah. You know, it's really nice when you can just outsource it.
- [32:02]
A
It's nice. But I'll tell you something. I honestly feel we got a lot even closer. And like, I will say for myself, I love you even more because I have been wearing this breadwinner capable man armor for about 20 years because since I was 18, I could always break bread. And having that armor taken away from the Hollywood strike and having to look at my wife and child and be like, yo, I. I don't got that armor no more. I can't just like buy anything you want on any day. Do you still with me? And like, you were actually able to convince me that you do and you love me and like, I'm a happier, better person because I don't love myself. That. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, when a dude like me can't get it, like as much as he usually is used to getting. Yeah, you don't love your. You just don't love yourself as much. It's just.
- [33:02]
B
You should love yourself.
- [33:03]
A
Yeah, well, you taught me to. Oh, I really. Now my thing is, if I can. If I can have the membership punch card for both weeks at the Russian Turkish Baths, I'm good. If you and Senna are taken care of. And I got my Russian Turkish Bath punch card for both weeks, David and Boris. I'm good. That's it.
- [33:23]
B
Period.
- [33:24]
A
Period. So watch the materialists. Talk to your shorty.
- [33:28]
B
Hold on. I would like to end it, because if you've gotten this far and you haven't watched the movie. I just want to talk about. So. So don't listen to this part. The leg surgery.
- [33:38]
A
Oh, my God, we forgot about this.
- [33:39]
B
I just have to. Have to Just five minutes. Talk about the leg surgery. Okay, so if you haven't watched it, go away. But if you have watched it, Dakota Johnson finds out that Pedro Pascal, who she deems a unicorn because he's tall, he's rich, born rich, still rich, smart, funny, hot, huge dick, all of it, right? She's like, you're a unicorn. You're 10 out of 10. I don't. I don't understand what's happening. And then we find out he had the leg surgery. He was short. He was 5 7. Now he's 6ft tall. He got the 6 inches or whatever the fuck. Maybe he was 5 4. I don't know. Something happened. He's tall now, 6 inches. She was like, I don't think I'm going on vacation with you anymore, shorty.
- [34:22]
A
Like, the funniest shit is watching the movie. He's like. He's like, I was 5 7. I'm like, motherfucker, I'm 5 7, watching this.
- [34:30]
B
And then. And then. And then there's a point where he. They're standing in front of each other and he. He bends down and he goes, would you still like me if I was 5 7? And it was maybe the funniest that I've ever seen in my life. Like, I was like, you know how they used to make Scary Movie all the time? I was like, if they were making a scary movie right now, like, it would be like the. I see dead people, but it would just be him, like, bending down, like, I have my old legs. Yeah, it was the funniest I've ever.
- [35:00]
A
Seen and was type corny, but the. That's the thing. So much of the movie. So corny, but it's real. Because while I've never been insecure about my height besides, like, playing ball, like, I wish I was taller. Right? My. My thing, though is. Is like, I take a lot of pride in breaking bread. And when I didn't have it, I did. There are moments where I'm like, you still fuck with me. And you, you were just, dude, don't be an idiot. You're such an idiot.
- [35:25]
B
I was like, yeah, I love this frozen pizza, period.
- [35:27]
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The Ooty era was the worst. I was like, yo, I think we could save a lot of money eating this frozen gluten free pizza instead of ordering frozen.
- [35:37]
B
And I said, you know what? I actually love it. I said, I actually genuinely love this frozen pizza.
- [35:42]
A
I fed you frozen pizza for like, two months of a pregnancy and you're still here.
- [35:46]
B
And I birthed a genius child. People are like, what did you eat when you were pregnant? I was like, oodie's frozen pizza.
- [35:53]
A
I love you.
- [35:54]
B
Love you. Don't get the surgery.
- [35:57]
A
Oh, never.