Nero Wolfe: The Beautiful Archer 11/24/1950

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Nero Wolfe — The Beautiful Archer (11/24/1950)

Podcast: Choice Classic Radio Detectives | Old Time Radio
Episode Theme:
Nero Wolfe and his sharp-tongued assistant Archie Goodwin unravel the mystery behind the murder of Willard Garth, embroiling them in a tale of passion, betrayal, and twisted love, centered on the accomplished archer, Diana Lawrence, and her sculptor father.

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Table of Contents

1. Case Introduction & Character Setup
2. Initial Suspects and Motives
3. The Investigation Unfolds
4. Major Revelations & Climax
5. Resolution & Thematic Insights
6. Notable Quotes and Moments

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1. Case Introduction & Character Setup

Key characters introduced:

• Nero Wolfe: Renowned for his intellect, aversion to physical activity, and love of beer.
• Archie Goodwin: Quick-witted, sarcastic assistant and narrator.
• Diana Lawrence: Fiery, skilled archer, daughter of sculptor Michael Lawrence.
• Michael Lawrence: Intense, artistic father with a mysterious attachment to Diana.
• Dr. Reynard Townley: Willard’s psychiatrist, directs the early intrigue.
• Willard Garth: Diana’s unstable fiancé, patient at the Townley Sanitarium.

Opening Setup:
Archie receives a call about a murder case and convinces Wolfe to take it due to their pressing need for money (01:29). The initial scene sets up Diana Lawrence’s strained relationship with both Townley and Garth.

Memorable Introduction (02:22):
"Yes, listeners, Archie is so right. He is the greatest detective in the world and the fattest and the least energetic.” — Narrator

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2. Initial Suspects and Motives

Diana’s Confrontation with Townley (03:13–06:26)

• Diana tries to forcibly persuade Dr. Townley to let her see Willard, even threatening him with a gun.
• Townley manipulates events (fake phone ring) and confiscates Diana’s gun, ending the interview coldly:
  “The gun, I'm afraid, stays with me here in this Majolica cabinet. I'd scarcely feel justified in trusting you with it.” — Dr. Townley (06:26)

The Lovers’ Rift (06:58–09:13)

• Diana and Willard’s relationship is shown as dysfunctional, with Willard exhibiting paranoia and aggression, accusing Diana of only wanting his money and ultimately threatening her life.

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3. The Investigation Unfolds

Initial Facts from Dr. Townley (09:28–11:12)

• Wolfe is told that Willard Garth was murdered during a chauffeured car ride with Diana. The handyman Haines, who drove the car, and Diana are both missing.

Visit to Michael Lawrence’s Studio (11:56–14:46)

• Archie interviews Michael Lawrence, who professes Diana’s innocence based on her classical beauty and civilized manners.
• Lawrence is defensive and secretive, even resorting to violence to protect Diana’s whereabouts, clocking Archie with a mallet.

“Why aren’t you trying to trick my daughter into disclosing her whereabouts?” — Michael Lawrence (14:47)

Developments from the Police (15:22–16:25)

• Diana is located and released due to lack of evidence—her alibi is that she didn't have the gun at the time (Townley allegedly took it).
• Wolfe is told that ballistics ruled out Diana as the shooter based on distance and circumstances.

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4. Major Revelations & Climax

Discovering Haynes and the Weapon (17:02–18:31)

• The search for the handyman Haynes leads Archie to Sheepshead Bay, but Haynes isn't found immediately.

Wolfe Confronts Townley—The Missing Gun (18:41–19:12)

• Wolfe’s intuition is confirmed when Townley discovers that Diana’s confiscated gun is missing—it’s the murder weapon.

The Fatal Arrow (20:44–21:24)

• Upon arriving at the sanitarium, Archie and Wolfe find Dr. Townley murdered with an arrow in his back.
  “There’s an arrow in his back and he’s dead.” — Archie Goodwin (21:24)

The Final Showdown at the Lawrence Studio (22:04–27:02)

• Michael Lawrence is unmasked as the prime suspect. Wolfe connects the emotional clues (“Apollo’s face is more finished and… looks a little familiar.” — Archie, 22:08) to Lawrence’s hidden motives.
• Lawrence, desperate, brandishes a Derringer and confesses his twisted love for Diana, leading to his unmasking as both Garth and Townley’s murderer.

“Such love as yours is really hate. You were content to see her dead rather than relinquish her.” — Nero Wolfe (26:41)

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5. Resolution & Thematic Insights

• Wolfe uncovers that Michael Lawrence, driven by a possessive, warped love for his adopted daughter, orchestrated the murders. His telltale confusion about the cabinet’s lock, knowledge of the weapon, and the dual nature in the sculpture confirm his guilt.
• Wolfe’s knowledge of Greek myth (Apollo and Ariadne) is pivotal:
  “He chiseled the features of the tortured God in his very own image.” — Wolfe (28:28)
• The episode ends with Wolfe, typically, turning his thoughts to food and the trivialities of daily life, even after solving a psychological labyrinth.

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6. Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• Archie on Wolfe’s Reluctance:
  “When my boss has to leave the house, it’s a major tragedy. Sometimes he rages, sometimes he curses. Sometimes he keeps very quiet and grips the side of the car desperately and tries not to inhale any fresh air.” (19:52)

• Wolfe’s Sarcasm at Archie’s Expense:
  “Keep your eye on the road. And don't strain yourself to make superfluous witticisms.” — Wolfe (20:17)

• Wolfe’s Philosophical Zinger:
  “Such love as yours is really hate. You were content to see her dead rather than relinquish her like all miserly small hearted men. You would rather kill the thing you love than muster the generosity necessary to seeing it attain heaven.” (26:44)

• The Classic Wolfe Wrap-up:
  “As a matter of fact, neither did I. No one could possibly have determined the brand by any chemical means in existence. I knew that, you see, and I took the long chance that Lawrence didn’t.” (27:34)

• Mythological Motif & Motivation:
  “According to the Greek myth, Apollo fell deeply in love with the nymph. But because they were of different wares, he was condemned to pursue her always and never to catch her... He chiseled the features of the tortured God in his very own image.” — Wolfe (28:16–28:28)

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Key Timestamps

• 01:29 — Archie takes the case; Wolfe’s fee and quirks.
• 03:13–06:26 — Diana’s confrontation with Dr. Townley.
• 09:28–11:12 — Dr. Townley briefs Wolfe on the murder.
• 11:56–14:46 — Archie’s tense interview with Michael Lawrence.
• 14:00 — Diana’s location nearly betrayed; “honey” slip.
• 15:22 — Detective Kramer updates the team; Diana's release.
• 18:41 — Wolfe calls Townley; discovery of missing gun.
• 20:44 — Arrival at sanitarium; discovery of Townley’s murder by arrow.
• 22:04 — Apollo’s face and the “reveal.”
• 26:41 — Wolfe exposes Lawrence’s motive and psyche.
• 28:16–28:28 — The motif of Apollo and Ariadne explained.
• 28:49 — Wolfe’s closing riff on dinner.

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Summary Takeaway

A masterclass in Golden Age radio drama, “The Beautiful Archer” weaves complex psychology, classical allusions, and sharp detective work. Wolfe’s insights into the human condition—artfully reflected in Michael Lawrence’s obsessions and the myth-inspired sculpture—make this case memorable. The episode’s wit, rich character interplay, and emotionally charged denouement offer classic Nero Wolfe in top form.

Transcript

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[Archie Goodwin]

Welcome to Choice Classic Radio where we bring to you the greatest old time radio shows like us on Facebook, subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for [e-mail] There's a full serving of.

[Narrator]

Laughs on the menu at Duffy's Tavern tonight with Archie the manager, played by Ed Gardner. Archie's colleagues in comedy are Ms. Duffy, Clifton Finnegan and Eddie the waiter. This Sunday, the big show comes your way once again on NBC. And just listen to a few of the stars who will be with you. Fred Allen, Jack Carson, Mindy Carson, Ed Archie Gardner, Ed Wynn, and many, many more. And of course, your emcee will be Tallulah Bankhead. Listen Sunday for the big show. Ladies and gentlemen, that phone bell means exciting adventure.

[Archie Goodwin]

Hello? Hello.

[Narrator]

The handsome young man answering the phone is Archie Goodwin, a mountain of a man engrossed in deep thought in the oversized armchair is Nero Wolf.

[Archie Goodwin]

Hey, boss. Oh, Mr. Wolf. Mr. Wolf, there's a guy on the phone, wants us to take a case. Seems that someone was mad at a guy who was mad and now this guy on the phone is mad. Wants us to find out who did the killing. What do you say, Mr. Wolf? We need the money. Hello? Yes, Mr. Wolf says he'll be happy to take the case. Just present yourself and a check for $2,000 at 601 W. 35th St. At 11:00'.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Clock.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mr. Wolf can't wait till you get here. He's dying to go to work.

[Narrator]

Goodbye.

[Archie Goodwin]

Greatest detective in the world. The only trouble is he.

[Narrator]

Yes, listeners, Archie is so right. He is the greatest detective in the world and the fattest and the least energetic. He's Nero Wolf. Created by Rex Stout and brought to you over this NBC network in a new series of Adventures by Mr. Sydney Greenstreet. Tonight, it's the Case of the Beautiful Archer. That's a good title. And it was a good case too. It began in the consulting room of Dr. Reynard Townley of the Townley Sanitarium, skipping a jump north of Nyack, New York, when a very lovely young lovely glared across the desk at the good doctor.

[Diana Lawrence]

Shall we pretend you don't know who I am, Dr. Townley, how could we possibly do that?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

My dear? Diana Lawrence, 23 years old, daughter of one of our better known sculptors, Michael Lawrence. You were born in Johannesburg, educated in London and Paris, and live at present 100 yards from here in your father's cottage on Berryhill Lane. How's that?

[Diana Lawrence]

It's intended to be staggering, isn't it?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

You take no cream or sugar in your coffee. We're winner of the Women's national archery tournament for 1947 and have an exceedingly high temper.

[Diana Lawrence]

Let's stop the nonsense. You have an inpatient here named Willard Garth. Willard Garth happens to be my fiance.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Yes, he has mentioned the fact during.

[Diana Lawrence]

His analysis and, well, has he by any chance mentioned his reasons for suddenly refusing to see me during the past five weeks?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

He didn't have to, Ms. Lawrence.

[Diana Lawrence]

What do you mean?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I mean that I recommended he give you up as a bad job.

[Diana Lawrence]

What? Well, I suppose you had some purpose in saying what you did.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Of course. I'm the boy's doctor. You think you're in love with Willard Garth. I know. But actually you're infatuated with the Garth millions.

[Diana Lawrence]

You take a lot on yourself, don't you, Doctor?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I consider it important to relieve Willard of all painful external pressure.

[Diana Lawrence]

You've done well for Willard, Dr. Townley, relieving him of me.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I think so.

[Diana Lawrence]

Let's see you relieve yourself of me.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

You purchased the gun for this occasion, Ms. Lawrence?

[Diana Lawrence]

Yes.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

And what exactly do you hope to accomplish with it?

[Diana Lawrence]

A quick and complete reversal of your decision about me. I'm not as easy to handle as well it is, you see. And if you intend to ruin my life, then I intend to end yours here and now.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

The phone is ringing. Let it ring, just as you say. It's the house phone, Ms. Lawrence. It may be Willard, you know.

[Diana Lawrence]

Who? Willard?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Yes, he usually phones me from his room at about this time every day.

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, all right, answer it. But be careful what you say.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

You're in command, it seems.

[Diana Lawrence]

Hello.

[Nero Wolfe]

Why, hello.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I thought it would be you, Willard. Look, my boy, Diana Lawrence is here. I've had a talk with her and I've reconsidered my opinion. Yes, yes, I'm quite serious. If you're at all sensible. You see her regularly and plan on a marriage as soon as you're discharged?

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Oh, you do? Very well. I'll see if she'll talk to you. Ms. Lawrence?

[Diana Lawrence]

Yes?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Do you want to speak with him?

[Diana Lawrence]

Give me the phone.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Of course. Here you are. And I'll take this Gun. There we are. Now stand away, Miss Lawrence. But Willard.

[Diana Lawrence]

Willard's on the phone.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Willard is not on the phone. No one was on the phone. The ring came from the push button bell under my desk here. Sometimes I find it convenient to interrupt my consultations with a phone call.

[Diana Lawrence]

Oh, you.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

You smug, deceitful, self sufficient murderer is a vexatious business. You'll be grateful to me one day.

[Diana Lawrence]

All right, give me my gun and let me go.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

The gun, I'm afraid, stays with me here in this majonica cabinet. I'd scarcely feel justified in trusting you with it. And now, with your permission or without it, the interview is ended.

[Archie Goodwin]

Later that day, the phone in the Lawrence house on Berry Hill Lane began to jingle. This time it was no phony.

[Diana Lawrence]

Hello, Diana? Yes, Willard, darling.

[Willard Garth]

Diana, darling, it's Willard.

[Diana Lawrence]

Imagine. Has the doctor let you use a telephone just as if you were a great big adult.

[Willard Garth]

Oh, I've got to see you, sweetheart. And I didn't call you to argue. Love, beauty, understanding. That's what matters, isn't it? Isn't it?

[Diana Lawrence]

Do I hear the overtones of a change of heart?

[Willard Garth]

Diana, what's happened wasn't my fault. He poisoned me against you.

[Diana Lawrence]

Then why don't you walk out of that amateur nuthouse and stand up like a man?

[Willard Garth]

I probably shall.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Diana.

[Willard Garth]

Now please listen to me. He's letting me have the limousine tonight from 8 until 12. I want us to go for a ride and talk and talk and talk until everything is clear. Clear as a bell, my baby.

[Diana Lawrence]

Don't tell me he's trusting you to drive.

[Willard Garth]

Oh, no, no. One of the handyman here will show for us. Oh, say you'll come, Diana, will you?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Say it.

[Willard Garth]

Say yes. Say you will.

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, yes, Willard, I'll be glad to.

[Willard Garth]

Eight o' clock then.

[Diana Lawrence]

Eight.

[Willard Garth]

Oh, bless you. Bless you, my angel.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh.

[Willard Garth]

Oh, so that's it. You want my father's money. That's what you love, not me.

[Diana Lawrence]

Willard, the chauffeur will hear you.

[Willard Garth]

It's the way Townley says it is. He's right. He's right.

[Diana Lawrence]

Oh, why did I let you talk me into this? What a fool I was to have come at all. You're sick inside, Willard. So utterly hopelessly sick.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh.

[Willard Garth]

Oh, so now I'm. I'm hopelessly sick.

[Diana Lawrence]

Yes, yes, you are.

[Willard Garth]

You're trying to confuse me, take advantage of me, wind me around your finger just because I love you too much.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

That's it.

[Willard Garth]

That's my illness. Of course I see it now.

[Nero Wolfe]

You.

[Willard Garth]

You're the thing I must get rid of you with your beautiful, beautiful face and your twisted values. You're at the bottom of all my agony.

[Diana Lawrence]

Will it.

[Willard Garth]

I'm saving myself. I'm saving myself. Once you're dead, the sickness is ended. I'll be safe. I'll be safe.

[Diana Lawrence]

Willard.

[Archie Goodwin]

Doctor Townley? Yes, come in. Mr. Wolf's been expecting him.

[Nero Wolfe]

Come in. Dr. Townley, come in. Have a chair.

[Archie Goodwin]

Thank you.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Mr. Wolf, I'm so happy you've agreed to take this case.

[Nero Wolfe]

Have a glass of beer?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Oh, no, no. Never at this time of morning.

[Michael Lawrence]

Thank you.

[Nero Wolfe]

Well, Doctor, the newspapers check with what you told me. The girl in young Garth went out for a ride in your limousine last night. The car was driven by one of your handymen.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

That's right. Haines, his name is.

[Nero Wolfe]

And they never came back. Young Garth was found dead in the car with two bullets in him. Girl was gone. And also Haynes, the handyman chauvin.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Correct, sir.

[Nero Wolfe]

Have you any idea where he could be?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

No, sir.

[Nero Wolfe]

And the young lady? Tell me about her.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

She's Diana Lawrence, daughter of Michael Lawrence, sculptor. The sculptor. She lives with him in a small cottage near my sanatorium on Berryhill Lane. An extremely aggressive and self centered female with more than a slight flare for violence.

[Nero Wolfe]

Your description might easily lead me to suspect her of this murder, sir.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I'm aware of that. And I don't think you'll be far off the mark. As I told you on the phone, she tried to murder me yesterday morning.

[Nero Wolfe]

The police have made no headway in locating her?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

No. The homicide division has contacted her father, but he's remained quite non committal. He simply says that he's sure she's incapable of killing a fly and that he hasn't laid eyes on her since 8 o' clock last night.

[Nero Wolfe]

Highly suspicious behavior.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

She was unquestionably in the car with young Garth when he was murdered.

[Archie Goodwin]

Hmm.

[Nero Wolfe]

She wasn't alone in the car with him.

[Archie Goodwin]

You were.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

You're referring to Haines?

[Nero Wolfe]

Yes, but he can't be found either, remember?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

It appears that he failed to list his address on his job application. But somehow, Mr. Wolf, I'm quite sure he'll show up this afternoon.

[Nero Wolfe]

Somehow. Dr. Townley, if I were you, I wouldn't be quite so sure. We must begin by facing the initial problem of locating our suspects. Archie.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes, sir.

[Nero Wolfe]

Get out the car and drive up to the house on Berryhill Lane. And then there you will ask Mr. Michael Lawrence to be sensible enough to cooperate with us in finding his daughter.

[Archie Goodwin]

And if the answer is no, I.

[Nero Wolfe]

Recommend Archie, that you flatly refuse to take it.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mr. Lawrence was no simple baby to handle. He was in a studio when I walked in, chiseling on a statue of a boy and a girl, both wearing less clothes than the law allows. And before I got a chance to state my name, he commenced giving me a free lecture on the marble work of art.

[Michael Lawrence]

She's good, really good. She's practically superb.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

The Ariadne.

[Archie Goodwin]

The what? Ariadne.

[Michael Lawrence]

The girl in the statue. Oh, that's Ariadne. Tragic nymph of Greek mythology. Don't tell me you're not familiar with Apollo and Ariadne.

[Archie Goodwin]

All right, I won't.

[Michael Lawrence]

The Apollo, on the other hand, is unfinished. The face you see lacks something. The passion of yearning. Olympian desire. And yet, you know, the two figures have motion. Like your daughter, eh?

[Archie Goodwin]

Your daughter, Diana, she's got motion also, as I hear it. She's been in motion ever since she murdered Willard Garth last night in the back end of a limousine.

[Michael Lawrence]

So you're another flat foot.

[Archie Goodwin]

Not exactly. I'm paid in private by Nero Wolf.

[Nero Wolfe]

Nero Wolf?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Yeah. You don't mean that.

[Michael Lawrence]

A creditable man like Wolf thinks Diana killed young Gar.

[Archie Goodwin]

Well, he'd like to talk over the possibility with her.

[Nero Wolfe]

How laughable.

[Michael Lawrence]

Look at that face. Is there anything of the murderous in a face like that?

[Archie Goodwin]

In a face like what?

[Michael Lawrence]

Oh, I'm sorry. Diana posed for the Ariadne, you see, and the likeness is exactly. You think a girl of this type, classic, sensitive, civilized, could descend to the clumsy brute level of murder?

[Archie Goodwin]

Well, it's. It's a little hard to imagine there.

[Michael Lawrence]

Even you agree with me.

[Nero Wolfe]

On the other hand.

[Michael Lawrence]

Shall we discuss the other hand over a cup of coffee? I'm quite exhausted.

[Archie Goodwin]

If you insist.

[Michael Lawrence]

I do sit down and inhale the atmosphere of culture at its source. There's a pot warming on the stove.

[Archie Goodwin]

Pot of what? Coffee or culture?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Well, wait to see what he means.

[Archie Goodwin]

Never ignore a phone call. Knows might be something important. Yes?

[Diana Lawrence]

This is Diana, Father.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Oh.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, yes, Diana.

[Diana Lawrence]

It's all over the papers.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes, I know.

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, I don't think they'll find me where I am. And I'm staying here until things quiet down a little.

[Archie Goodwin]

Where are you, honey?

[Diana Lawrence]

What did you say?

[Archie Goodwin]

I said, where are you?

[Diana Lawrence]

You said, honey. Daddy, you never call me honey.

[Archie Goodwin]

I know. It's because I'm excited. Where are you, sweetheart?

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, you mustn't let anybody find out.

[Archie Goodwin]

Not a soul in the world. Where are you?

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, you know where Tyne pike turns off to the left beyond Bartsville?

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah.

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, I'm.

[Michael Lawrence]

Call me later, angel.

[Diana Lawrence]

But father.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Oh, oh.

[Archie Goodwin]

Get that motorman's number.

[Michael Lawrence]

You will live my friend, but not long if you don't control your curiosity with that mallet.

[Willard Garth]

You hit me.

[Archie Goodwin]

What was the big idea?

[Michael Lawrence]

You really have to ask that question? Why aren't you trying to trick my daughter into disclosing her whereabouts?

[Archie Goodwin]

The police are pretty interested in her whereabouts.

[Michael Lawrence]

Then let them find her. But you can't be surprised, my friend, if I choose to protect Diana's interests.

[Nero Wolfe]

So he's working on an Apollo and Ariadne, is he?

[Archie Goodwin]

Aji who cares about Apollo and Ariadne? The point is how he worked on my gourd.

[Nero Wolfe]

That of course is unfortunate, my boy, but you get that piece.

[Willard Garth]

Hello, Inspector Kramer.

[Archie Goodwin]

Hold it for you here.

[Nero Wolfe]

Yes, Wolf. How are you Inspector?

[Willard Garth]

I hear you're in on the Goth killing.

[Nero Wolfe]

Not very deeply I am afraid. We are still trying to locate the Lawrence girl.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Well, you can forget about that.

[Nero Wolfe]

Yeah?

[Willard Garth]

Yes, we've already located her and released her on a habeas corpus.

[Nero Wolfe]

That sounds interesting.

[Willard Garth]

Her father had a lawyer on our heads before she was in here 10 minutes.

[Nero Wolfe]

Too bad you couldn't have held onto her.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I don't know.

[Willard Garth]

I'm not so sure we want her.

[Nero Wolfe]

Why not?

[Willard Garth]

Well, first of all, it's not likely she did it.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

No? No.

[Willard Garth]

Ballistic stated that the bullets that killed Willard Garth were not fired from point blank range and she was sitting beside him on the back seat. Is he also, we found the murder weapon in the grass near where the limousine was parked and she admitted it was hers.

[Nero Wolfe]

That sounds like a poor reason to release him.

[Willard Garth]

Well, the point is she wasn't in possession of the gun when the killing happened. At least so she says.

[Nero Wolfe]

No.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Who?

[Nero Wolfe]

What?

[Willard Garth]

The doctor.

[Nero Wolfe]

What doctor?

[Willard Garth]

Townley, the guy who runs that sanitarium. According to her, he took the gun away from her for safekeeping at noon yesterday.

[Archie Goodwin]

There was a little more talk between them. Something about fresh cigar ashes that were found in the dashboard ashtray of the limousine. After that the boss hung up and exerted himself enough to put a call through to the Townley Sanatorium.

[Diana Lawrence]

I'm afraid the doctor is very busy just now, sir.

[Nero Wolfe]

My, my business happens to be highly important.

[Diana Lawrence]

Well, I'll say you called Mr. Wolfe and I'll ask him to contact you just as soon as he has a free moment.

[Nero Wolfe]

Do you happen to have a free moment, miss?

[Diana Lawrence]

Why yes sir.

[Nero Wolfe]

Could you spend it by telling me if that handyman, Mr. Haynes is being located?

[Diana Lawrence]

Why yes, as a matter of fact he has. One of the staff just found out where he lives, Mr. Wolfe. Well, he has a little cottage at 206 Dockside Road. That's out near Sheepshead Bay.

[Nero Wolfe]

Thank you, Archie.

[Archie Goodwin]

I'm going someplace.

[Michael Lawrence]

I suppose you are.

[Nero Wolfe]

You're going to Sheepshead Bay. Hello there.

[Archie Goodwin]

Looking for a guy I can't find. Oh, yeah. His name is Haynes. Stopped at the cottage up there, but there's no one there. I saw you here on the wharf fishing, so I.

[Willard Garth]

What did you say his name is?

[Archie Goodwin]

Haynes. H a I n e S. Ah. Oh, Haines.

[Narrator]

Yeah.

[Archie Goodwin]

Do you know him?

[Willard Garth]

Well, there's a fella named Hines, used to fish.

[Archie Goodwin]

No, no, no, not Heinz Haynes.

[Willard Garth]

Couldn't be Huntingberg.

[Archie Goodwin]

No, it couldn't be. The name is Haines. H a I n Haynes.

[Diana Lawrence]

Give me your hand here.

[Archie Goodwin]

Well, what do you know?

[Narrator]

Funny, huh?

[Willard Garth]

That guy seems to think my name is Haynes.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah, so do I.

[Willard Garth]

You do?

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes, I.

[Narrator]

I got back to our.

[Archie Goodwin]

House soaked to the skin and minus Hanes. And just in time to see the boss in the exhausting process of walking across the room to answer the phone.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Hello, this is Dr. Townley. You called me.

[Nero Wolfe]

So I did.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

About the murder.

[Nero Wolfe]

More specifically, about the statement from Diana Lawrence that you removed a firearm from her possession yesterday morning.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

That's quite correct. It's here in my Majolica cabinet.

[Nero Wolfe]

Is it?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Of course it is.

[Nero Wolfe]

I suggest you check.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Just a moment, Mr. Wolf. Yes? I'd like to see you at once.

[Nero Wolfe]

Gun, I suppose, has vanished.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

But how did you know?

[Nero Wolfe]

Because it is at ballistics, doctor. It turned out to be the gun that killed Willard Garth.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I. I see. Do you? Yes, I understand everything now. It's all so crystal clear.

[Nero Wolfe]

Just how, Christopher.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I'm quite certain, Mr. Wolf, that I can put my finger on the killer.

[Nero Wolfe]

And I think it would be well if you came here immediately.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Oh, I'm afraid it's impossible, sir. There's an important operation schedule and I simply cannot leave.

[Nero Wolfe]

What do you suggest?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Well, is it outside the realm of possibility that you come here?

[Willard Garth]

Is it?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Mr. Wolf?

[Willard Garth]

Hello, Mr. Wolf.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Mr. Wolfe.

[Archie Goodwin]

When my boss has to leave thus house, it's a major tragedy. Sometimes he rages, sometimes he curses. The whole detective business, lock, stock and barrel. And sometimes he keeps very quiet and grips the side of the car desperately and tries not to inhale any fresh air. This was one of the quiet times.

[Nero Wolfe]

Just go slowly, Archie, but get there as quickly as you can.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, you don't want to show for Mr. Wolf. What you need is a magician.

[Nero Wolfe]

Keep Your eye on the road. And don't strain yourself to make superfluous witticisms.

[Archie Goodwin]

Why don't you try relaxing a little? I hear there hasn't been a man eating tiger sighted on the Sawmill River Parkway in the last 500 years.

[Nero Wolfe]

Your liberty is out of order. Don't try to make light of a deplorable situation.

[Archie Goodwin]

Here's the sanatorium. And there's Dr. Townley coming to meet us.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

It's terribly nice of you to have come, Mr. Wolf. I've heard about your aversion to traveling and I appreciate your going to the trouble.

[Nero Wolfe]

Don't mention it. Oh, Archie, help me out with my other arm. There we are.

[Archie Goodwin]

Now, calm down. You're all in one piece.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

I think you'll find the trip highly profitable, Mr. Wolf. You'll consider it time. Very well.

[Michael Lawrence]

Hey.

[Willard Garth]

Hey.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

What's the matter?

[Nero Wolfe]

What is it? What happened?

[Michael Lawrence]

He's been shot.

[Nero Wolfe]

Hardly likely. There wasn't a sound.

[Archie Goodwin]

This kind of shot doesn't make a sound, boss.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

What do you mean?

[Archie Goodwin]

Better take a look for yourself. There's an arrow in his back and he's dead. We remembered that Dr. Townley had said Diana Lawrence had won the Women's national archery tournament for 1947. The Lawrence House was visible through the trees a hundred yards away. So we started for it. And the sculptor's studio. There's no one around.

[Nero Wolfe]

So this is his latest effort. Apollo and Ariadne.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah. Done a little work on it since I was here. The Apollo's face is more finished and. Hey, boss.

[Nero Wolfe]

Yes?

[Archie Goodwin]

You know, somehow or other, Apollo looks a little familiar.

[Nero Wolfe]

I wouldn't be surprised, Archie. I think if you examine it closely, are our hosts. You remember me, don't you?

[Archie Goodwin]

I met you once at a dinner.

[Michael Lawrence]

Party at your house. The time they opened the new museum on 67th Street.

[Nero Wolfe]

Of course. Of course, Mr. Lawrence.

[Michael Lawrence]

And to what do I owe the honor?

[Archie Goodwin]

It's not much of an honor. Dr. Townley has been murdered.

[Nero Wolfe]

No, I am afraid Mr. Goodwin is being accurate.

[Archie Goodwin]

He's been murdered with a bow and arrow. And what does that mean to you, Mr. Lawrence?

[Michael Lawrence]

I'm sorry. I've been a fool. An awful fool.

[Archie Goodwin]

You can't blame yourself too much. If you'd cooperated with the police instead of looking out for your daughter's interest, the man would still be alive.

[Michael Lawrence]

But I assure you.

[Nero Wolfe]

Where's the girl?

[Michael Lawrence]

She should be here now. She phoned me a while ago and said she was coming by for passage money to Rio.

[Diana Lawrence]

You were looking for me?

[Archie Goodwin]

Wasp.

[Michael Lawrence]

Diana put the gun down, angel, and.

[Diana Lawrence]

Tie a rope around my neck.

[Nero Wolfe]

Might I inquire if your plan is to kill us all?

[Diana Lawrence]

Ms. Lawrence, what would yours be if the world was after you for something you didn't do?

[Nero Wolfe]

Wouldn't you be willing to risk persuading a jury of that?

[Diana Lawrence]

Thanks. No, I'll skip that chance. Father. Father, get me the money.

[Michael Lawrence]

Diana, sweetheart. Don't make me a part of your murders. That's asking too much of love.

[Diana Lawrence]

Don't you know I'm not guilty?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

No. No, Diana.

[Michael Lawrence]

I don't leave that gun laid.

[Nero Wolfe]

Diana Haynes.

[Willard Garth]

Looks like I walked in on the nose.

[Archie Goodwin]

That's him, boss. The guy who soused me.

[Nero Wolfe]

Take a little of your own advice. Relax, Archie. What do you want here, Mr. Haynes?

[Willard Garth]

I want to give up and try to straighten out this little deal. Mr. Lawrence.

[Michael Lawrence]

Yes?

[Willard Garth]

Here's your money back. You got a right to call me a welcher. I promised I wouldn't give evidence against the girl. And you paid my price.

[Archie Goodwin]

But enough is enough.

[Willard Garth]

And right here and now I'm unloading.

[Nero Wolfe]

Just what does this mean?

[Willard Garth]

It means I saw her do it.

[Diana Lawrence]

Oh, you. You stupid, lying, rotten.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Oh, yeah.

[Nero Wolfe]

Trevor.

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Archie.

[Nero Wolfe]

Trebber. Get the pair of them out of here.

[Michael Lawrence]

What can I say to myself now?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

What can I do?

[Nero Wolfe]

I'm sorry, Mr. Lawrence. It's not necessary to eat your heart out. Many fathers before you have done their best and failed.

[Michael Lawrence]

But I had a special duty toward Diana.

[Nero Wolfe]

Special duty?

[Michael Lawrence]

Yes, I. Well, you see, you find it out sooner or later. So I'd best tell you now. I'm not a real father. I adopted her nine years ago when she was 14.

[Nero Wolfe]

I see.

[Michael Lawrence]

And I should never have done it. I realize now that I wasn't equal to the task.

[Nero Wolfe]

Well, well, well. Not lost yet. You may not convictly, you know. Yeah, I said they may not convict her.

[Michael Lawrence]

How could they fail to convict her? She killed Garth, didn't she?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

Did she?

[Michael Lawrence]

She shot him.

[Nero Wolfe]

But the gun was in Townley's possession.

[Michael Lawrence]

She could easily have stolen that. She could have broken into his office later. It wasn't locked.

[Nero Wolfe]

What wasn't locked?

[Michael Lawrence]

The Majolica cabinet. I mean.

[Nero Wolfe]

I believe you mean what you said, Lawrence. The Majolica cabinet. Over the life of me, I can't see how you could know whether it was locked or not. Unless you had the experience of opening it. Could it be that you went looking for the gun yourself after Townley said he had confiscated it? That you killed Townley with a bow and arrow, which you handle as well as your daughter because he was just on the point of telling me that you knew where the gun was and that you were the likeliest murder suspect.

[Michael Lawrence]

You must be mad.

[Nero Wolfe]

Oh, sir, not I. But you are mad. And more than a little. You hated Willard Garth. It was you who were making the marriage impossible. You loathed him, and in the end you killed him.

[Michael Lawrence]

How could I have killed him?

[Nero Wolfe]

I tell you a little secret, Mr. Lawrence. The police found cigar ash in the dashboard tray of the death car. Chemical analysis showed that the ash was from an El Adoro cigar. What have you got in your left hand, sir?

[Michael Lawrence]

In my, An El Adoro cigar. And in my right hand, a Derringer.

[Nero Wolfe]

Powerful and admirable little weapon, Lance.

[Michael Lawrence]

I suggest you show proper respect for it by dropping all this here and now.

[Nero Wolfe]

You don't wish to hear me say the rest? That you were horribly in love with Diana, your own adopted daughter. In love and hopelessly, eternally frustrated. You begrudge me the triumph of accusing you of having bribed Haines to let you take his place at the driver's seat of the limousine and further bribed and threatened him into putting on his show of many pranks and false confessions to confess confuse us all beyond measure.

[Michael Lawrence]

You said, I love Diana. Would I do all this to her if I did?

[Nero Wolfe]

Oh, but of course. Such love as yours is really hate. You were content to see her dead rather than relinquish her like all miserly small hearted men. You would rather kill the thing you love than muster the generosity necessary to seeing it attain heaven.

[Michael Lawrence]

That's enough out of you.

[Nero Wolfe]

I should think it was much too much. It is, Archie, my boy, I'm grateful to you both for coming back into the house when you did and for being such a good shot.

[Archie Goodwin]

Hope you remember that next time you feel like insulting me, tell me what's with that cigar ash routine? Who told you the ashes in the limousine were from an Elidoro, boss? I never heard anything about that.

[Nero Wolfe]

As a matter of fact, neither did I. No one could possibly have determined the brand by any chemical means in existence. I knew that, you see, and I took the long chance that Lawrence didn't.

[Archie Goodwin]

Aha. But I still don't get the mainspring of the deal. How did you know he was in love with Diana?

[Nero Wolfe]

That that was genius. I have to admit it. You see, it all hinged on the statue of Apollo and Ariadne. According to the Greek myth, Apollo fell deeply in love with the nymph. But because they were of different wares, he was condemned to pursue her always and never to catch her.

[Archie Goodwin]

Well, what's that got to do with the price of eggs?

[Nero Wolfe]

Isn't it perfectly obvious? Didn't he tell you that Diana had posed for the Ariadne?

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah, but I still don't.

[Nero Wolfe]

And you yourself remarked on the fact that the finished Apollo looked somehow familiar, didn't you, Archie?

[Narrator]

Yeah.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah, I did.

[Nero Wolfe]

Don't you know why that was?

[Dr. Reynard Townley]

You mean.

[Nero Wolfe]

I mean. And Michael Lawrence unconsciously revealed the true state of his heart. He didn't intend to, I suppose, but precisely and accurately, he chiseled the features of the tortured God in his very own image. Oh, and speaking of torture.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah?

[Nero Wolfe]

Will we be home in time for dinner?

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, boss, you can't be that hungry.

[Nero Wolfe]

Oh, yeah. Good heavens. Did you realize that I haven't eaten since lunch?

[Narrator]

You have been listening to the new Adventures of Nero Wolf, starring Sydney Green Street. Tonight's transcribed story by Peter Berry was based on the characters created by Rex Stout. This is an Edwin Fadiman program produced and directed by J. Donald Wilson. In the castle were Larry Dobkin as Archie Goodwin and Gigi Pearson, Ted Von Else, Bill Johnstone, Peter Leeds and Jay Novello. Next week at this same time, Nero Wolf and Archie will bring you the case of the brave rabbit. Don Stanley speaking. There's fun and laughs later tonight when Ed Archie Gardner stars as Archie, the manager in Duffy's Tavern. As usual, Duffy won't be there, but Archie will be there armed with his own whimsical version of the English language. Another Friday favorite you'll hear later is the delightful Life of Riley, starring William Bendix as Chester A. Riley.