Pat Novak for Hire: Fleet Lady 03/06/1949

Summary

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Pat Novak for Hire: "Fleet Lady" (03/06/1949)

Overview

In this classic detective episode, hardboiled San Francisco PI Pat Novak finds himself ensnared in a case involving a missing racehorse, a dead jockey, double-crossing gamblers, and a femme fatale with murderous motives. As always, Novak’s sardonic narration takes us through San Francisco's seedy underbelly, outsmarting conmen and cops alike as he unravels a deadly plot tied to the Bonanza Handicap at the local racetrack.

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Key Discussion Points and Plot Breakdown

1. The Jockey, the Bribe, and the Missing Horse

• Pat Novak is in his waterfront office when Jackie Greg—a nervous, pint-sized jockey—arrives, desperate to find Fleet Lady, his mount for the next day’s big race, who has vanished (02:19).
  • Novak is offered $200 to track her down, but doubts Greg’s story, sensing trouble:

    “It was like a guy stealing a murder gun to help out on a scrap metal drive.” (04:32)

• Greg claims he followed the horse’s abductors to the waterfront, but lost them near Pier 19.

2. Sybil Thornton and a Dead Horse… or Not

• Novak heads to the racetrack to confront Sybil Thornton, Fleet Lady’s glamorous and inscrutable owner.
  • A tense, flirtatious exchange reveals little, until she agrees to show Novak Fleet Lady in the stables (05:21).
    • They find a body in the stall; Novak realizes Fleet Lady has been shot (06:41).
    • Sybil icily warns Novak:

      “Remember what happened to Fleet Lady.” (07:01)

3. Murder in the Stables and the Police Arrive

• Inspector Hellman (the perennial foil) arrives at the scene, finding both Novak and the body of Jackie Greg, not Fleet Lady, dead in stall 18 (08:33).
  • The realization:

    “That dead horse in there is wearing a double-breasted suit.” – Hellman (08:52)

• Novak and Hellman spar, Novak’s alibi is shaky, and he becomes a prime suspect (10:12).

4. Novak Seeks Help and Digs for Motives

• Novak turns to his alcoholic friend, Jocko Madigan, for help investigating (11:26).
  • Jocko, in typically poetic fashion, muses:

    “There's nothing in nature so sad as a half-empty bottle. It's like a broken vow or an unfulfilled promise in the skies. A falling star – almost.” (12:20)

• The duo explores connections: Sybil Thornton’s checkered past, her four divorces, and links to slick gambler Rudy Hauser (14:20).
  • Hauser’s ties to Sybil are shady, and Hauser claims not to know of Greg’s death, but is oddly confident Fleet Lady will win.

5. The Fix, Double-Cross, and a Complex Plot Revealed

• As Novak tracks leads, he learns:
  • There’s talk of a swap—a “ringer” running in Fleet Lady’s place to rig the race.
  • Hauser is betting huge on Fleet Lady, despite rumors that the real horse is dead.
  • Novak suspects Sybil and bookmaker Ronnie Stark are in on the scheme (20:18).

6. The Race and the Climax

• At the track, the odds on Fleet Lady skyrocket, as most money pours onto other horses (25:50).
• Hauser vanishes moments before the big race.
• Novak rushes to the stables to confront Sybil and the conspirators after the race (27:12).
  • Hauser threatens Sybil, demanding repayment after losing a fortune on Fleet Lady when she doesn’t win.
  • A violent confrontation: Hauser, armed and desperate, is trampled to death by the horse he tried to fix the race for.

7. Final Twist and Resolution

• Ronnie Stark tries to frame Sybil for murder, but the truth comes out:
  • Jackie Greg tried to blackmail Sybil into a cut of the scheme and was killed by her when things got out of hand.
  • The “dead horse” was actually a ringer, not Fleet Lady.
  • Jocko delivers the punchline:

    “The horse that killed Hauser was a filly.” (31:33)

• Novak closes, as always, with cynicism about the futility of trying to outwit fate—or a horse.

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Jackie Greg pitches his problem to Novak – 02:19
• First meeting with Sybil Thornton – 05:21
• Discovery of the body in the stable – 06:41
• Inspector Hellman arrives; the mystery of the suit-wearing horse – 08:33, 08:52
• Pat and Jocko's philosophical banter – 11:50, 12:20
• Learning about Sybil's history and the gambling angle – 14:20
• Novak presses Hauser for answers – 15:19, 16:05
• Sybil and Ronnie Stark’s suspicious partnership – 20:18
• At the racetrack, the odds and suspicions shift – 25:50
• Climax: confrontation, Hauser’s death – 27:12, 28:47
• Unmasking the killer and Jocko’s punchline – 29:02, 31:33
• Novak’s final narration – 30:06

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Pat Novak on trouble:

  “Down on the waterfront in San Francisco, there’s a price tag on everything… it’s like trying to dance the minuet in skis.” (01:47, 01:59)

• Sybil Thornton’s icy warning:

  “You just wouldn’t look good with a saddle, Mr. Novak.” (07:06)

• Jocko Madigan’s philosophy:

  “There's nothing in nature so sad as a half-empty bottle...” (12:20)

• Hellman’s dark humor:

  “That dead horse in there is wearing a double-breasted suit.” (08:52)

• Jocko’s revelation:

  “The horse that killed Hauser was a filly.” (31:33)

• Novak’s cynicism, closing the case:

  “He should have learned the first time – you can’t beat the horses.” (28:51)

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Tone and Style

True to its hardboiled roots, this episode is rich in snappy banter, biting sarcasm, and world-weary noir narration. Novak’s quips, Jocko’s poetic drunkenness, the seedy racetrack intrigue, and the cynical approach to crime and justice all evoke the gritty San Francisco backdrop and classic radio detective style.

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Summary Takeaways

"Fleet Lady" intertwines classic tropes: a crooked horse race, a femme fatale, misplaced trust, and a detective who survives on street smarts and dogged persistence. The plot twists between stolen horses and swapped identities, gambling debts and murders stacked like chips on the table. Pat Novak, as ever, is in over his head yet a step ahead, and the only sure thing turns out to be the unpredictability of both horses and humans.

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Transcript

[Narrator/Announcer]

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[Pat Novak]

Radio, where we bring to you the.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Greatest old time radio shows like us on Facebook.

[Pat Novak]

Subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for [e-mail] Ladies and gentlemen, the American Broadcasting Company brings to its entire network one of radio's most unusual programs.

[Inspector Hellman]

Pat Novak or higher.

[Pat Novak]

Sure, I'm pat novak for hire.

That's what the sign out in front of my office says, Pat Novak for hire.

You gotta put it in block letters. Because down on the waterfront in San Francisco, there's a price tag on everything.

You gotta do that or marry a rich widow.

I don't like to work that hard, so I rent boats and do anything else that's cash and carry. Oh, it's all right. You don't mind trouble? Because that's one thing you can't duck. It's like trying to dance the minuet in skis. And the best trouble always looks good from the outside.

You're all smiles and you feel like a kid opening a hand grenade under the Christmas tree. I found that out Tuesday night. Was around 7 o'. Clock. I was getting ready to close the office when this little guy showed up. Was about the size of a golf bag with arms. If he had a cigar box, he could see over a pool table. He walked up to the desk and started talking in a voice that made you think he was trying to put Lily Pons out of work.

[Jackie Greg]

Hello. You Novak?

[Pat Novak]

You're doing all right so far. What's on your mind?

[Jackie Greg]

I'm Jackie Greg. You heard of me, huh?

[Pat Novak]

You're the shy type. I know.

[Jackie Greg]

I'm Jackie Greg, the jockey. You heard of me, huh?

[Pat Novak]

All right, now I heard of you. Put the show on the road.

[Jackie Greg]

I'm looking for a horse. You want to find me a horse?

[Pat Novak]

Yeah. I breed him in the back room. What color you want?

[Jackie Greg]

You're so tough, I gotta take that from you.

[Pat Novak]

Calm down before you wind up in a boy's choir. If you got anything to sell, put it on the line or beat it.

[Jackie Greg]

I'm riding a horse tomorrow called Fleet Lady. She's disappeared.

[Pat Novak]

She's not here.

[Jackie Greg]

I'm supposed to ride the sixth race with her tomorrow. The banana's a handicap and she's gone.

[Pat Novak]

All right, she's gone. Maybe your horse likes to go out at night. I haven't seen her. Get to the point.

[Jackie Greg]

I'll give you 200 bucks to find that horse. Somebody took her in a van. I trailed him down here at the waterfront.

[Pat Novak]

But you lost him up at the Ferry Building.

[Jackie Greg]

That's right. Something funny's going on. My mount disappeared and you gotta find her.

[Pat Novak]

This is a big waterfront. And where's the 200 bucks?

[Jackie Greg]

You'll get that all right. Found by Pier 19. They turned in. You think you can find Fleet lady?

[Pat Novak]

I don't know. Who owns her?

[Jackie Greg]

Woman named Sybil Thornton. She's mixed up, I think.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah? Why steal your own horse?

[Jackie Greg]

I don't know. Run a ring and maybe.

[Pat Novak]

That's a tough trick.

[Jackie Greg]

This woman's got some good ones. You want the 200 bucks?

[Pat Novak]

Yeah. How are the odds?

[Jackie Greg]

What's the difference? You gonna open a book? You better take the 200 bucks now.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, the doe will keep. You sound frightened, Junior.

[Jackie Greg]

And you sound nosy. Here's a 200. I want you to find the horse. You let me know at the Kingston Hotel, huh?

[Pat Novak]

Sure.

[Jackie Greg]

If you don't find anything around the waterfront, maybe you better try the track. Ask around there.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah. By the way, how do you fit in? How come you got $200 interest in that horse?

[Jackie Greg]

Maybe I love horses. What do you care if maybe I love horses?

[Pat Novak]

I don't. A guy like you've got to love something.

Oh, it was a real sweet proposition. A jockey in search of a horse. There was something phony about the whole thing. I had the 200 bucks, but I didn't feel good. It was like a guy stealing a murder gun to help out on a scrap metal drive. Well, after the little guy left, I closed the office and started to hit the docks. But it didn't work out. You can buy good whiskey these days. So you feel funny walking up to some guy on the pier and asking, have you seen a racehorse around here, mister? By nine, I was sure that horse wasn't around. So I borrowed a car and drove out to the track. I found out where Sybil Thornton's horses were quartered and headed down that way. It was pretty dark, so when I bumped into her, all I got was a vague outline. She had a good looking vague outline.

[Sybil Thornton]

I'm very sorry.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, I'm full of regrets, too. Should we try it again?

[Sybil Thornton]

Aren't you a little mixed up in your animals. They keep horses here.

[Pat Novak]

You don't seem to mind.

[Sybil Thornton]

No. You lean nicely, but you'd probably feel safer with a platform.

[Pat Novak]

Well, we'll try this again when I've had three good meals. That's a horse.

[Sybil Thornton]

Yes, I know. In fact, I own her.

[Pat Novak]

I see. That'd make you Sybil Thornton.

[Sybil Thornton]

Yes. What would that make you?

[Pat Novak]

A guy named Pat Novak looking for your horse. I was hired in the waterfront to find her.

[Sybil Thornton]

Why? They grow big on the waterfront. You must get a lot of sun. By the way, is Fleet lady missing your jockey?

[Pat Novak]

Say she is. That's why I'm snooping around.

[Sybil Thornton]

I didn't know he had any friends.

[Pat Novak]

He's got a checkbook. How about Fleet Lady? Is she tucked in bed?

[Sybil Thornton]

Yeah.

[Pat Novak]

Let's take a look.

[Sybil Thornton]

You'd find it very dull, Mr. Novak.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, that's what they said to Anthony. Let's see the horse, huh?

[Sybil Thornton]

Suit yourself. She's down this way.

[Pat Novak]

Okay.

[Sybil Thornton]

I'm doing this out of the bigness of my heart. I think you're wasting my generosity, Mr. Novy.

[Pat Novak]

Don't use it all this trip.

[Sybil Thornton]

It's from in the stable. Come on. All right.

Down about here. Complete ladies stall here. There's a flashlight on the wall.

[Pat Novak]

Okay.

[Sybil Thornton]

Poor thing.

[Pat Novak]

Your horses die broke, too. Who is it? Fleet Lady?

[Sybil Thornton]

Yes. Are you satisfied?

[Pat Novak]

No. I'm gonna ring up headquarters.

[Sybil Thornton]

Are you crazy?

[Pat Novak]

Then I'm gonna call Jackie Greg and tell him his hunch paid off.

[Sybil Thornton]

I wouldn't do that, Mr. Novak.

[Pat Novak]

Stop kidding me, sweetheart. She didn't get killed in a fight with another horse. Greg figured somebody was telling the machine. That's why Fleet Lady's dead. That's why I'm gonna call headquarters.

[Sybil Thornton]

Suit yourself. But remember what happened to Fleet Lady.

[Pat Novak]

You're getting tough, angel. No.

[Sybil Thornton]

You just wouldn't look good with a saddle, Mr. Novak.

[Pat Novak]

I watched her as she turned and walked out of there. Was the kind of a walk that makes you flip the calendar and find out how far away spring is.

I looked around a while, but it didn't do any good. The place was full of doors. So whoever killed Fleet lady got out easy. Like a rumor at a church picnic. I closed the door and went down the line to call headquarters. As I stood in there talking, I saw Sybil Thornton drive by. It was a long convertible with red asbestos seat covers. After I called headquarters, I went back and waited near the stable. About a half hour later, a police car pulled up. And when I saw who got out, I began to get unhappy. Like a three legged man in a ballet school. It was Hellman from Homicide and he had a squad with him.

[Inspector Hellman]

All right, I'll talk to him. I'll talk to him. Hello, Novak. Where's your trainer?

[Pat Novak]

Your boys get paid to laugh at you, Hellman. I don't.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah, where's the horse?

[Pat Novak]

What are you doing on the case?

[Inspector Hellman]

I came for the ride. You mind, Novak?

[Pat Novak]

No, I just wondered if they wised up downtown. Because you could find a dead horse, Hellman. If they staked it out in the middle of Market street, you'd find it before long.

[Inspector Hellman]

I'll try this time. Where is it?

[Pat Novak]

Stall 18. Over there. Yeah.

[Inspector Hellman]

Keep an eye on him, boys. I'll be back in a minute.

In here, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, the one with the teeth like yours.

[Inspector Hellman]

You better shut up, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

Don't get jumpy. You haven't seen the horse.

[Inspector Hellman]

Just shut up, huh?

[Pat Novak]

Wasn't gonna be much of a conversation anyway.

[Inspector Hellman]

What color horse was that, Novak?

[Pat Novak]

What do you mean? Take a look.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah, I did. I just took a look. It's a smart horse, Novak, huh? That's right. That dead horse in there is wearing a double breasted suit.

[Pat Novak]

Hellman got the message straight. I walked in and took a look. Jackie Gregg was lying there on the floor as dead as last year's love. The sickness didn't show until we rolled him over on his stomach. Somebody had gone duck hunting in the middle of his back.

I began to feel a little sick myself and was ready to send out for the same gun when Hellman started to talk.

[Inspector Hellman]

You forgot to mention the guy when you phoned headquarters.

[Pat Novak]

He wasn't there. I was in here before and the guy wasn't around.

[Inspector Hellman]

What was he doing out of the horse?

[Pat Novak]

I don't know. Hellman maybe crawled out of a crack. I don't know. There were two shots. I came in and found the horse.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah?

[Pat Novak]

Check the horse.

[Inspector Hellman]

You're trying to tell me the horse shot back? Who is he?

[Pat Novak]

A guy by the name of Jackie Gray. He gave me 200 bucks to find a missing horse. Yeah, A horse called Fleet lady running into Mars Handicap. This is the end of the line.

[Inspector Hellman]

How do you know it's the same one?

[Pat Novak]

I don't. Maybe you gotta be a horse to tell. Why don't you ask one of your boys?

Yeah, the boy's real tough. Call him off, Hellman.

[Inspector Hellman]

He's nasty. We all hate him, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

It's all right. I'll put it on your bill, Hellman.

[Inspector Hellman]

That's good. You can write it up at headquarters.

[Pat Novak]

Hellman, you ought to run an idiot. The heavy thinking's too much for you.

[Inspector Hellman]

I can piece this together. We come out here and find a dead man with you kicking up dust 40ft away.

[Pat Novak]

Look, Helmut, I didn't kill the guy and then call up headquarters. I know they're bad in Homicide, but I'm not that big hearted.

[Inspector Hellman]

We got a spare hook for you, Novak. That's where you stay until somebody gets you off.

[Pat Novak]

You can start out with Sybil Thornton.

[Inspector Hellman]

Another horse.

[Pat Novak]

She's got the speed for it. Look her up. She owns Fleet lady. And she was dashing around here in the dark playing easy to get.

[Inspector Hellman]

I'll look her up.

[Pat Novak]

You better leave the boys behind. After all, she's only a woman. When you see her, ask about that van down on the waterfront. And ask what she was doing before I made that phone call.

[Inspector Hellman]

I'll tag all the bases. Don't worry, Junior. And if things fit together, you'll both.

[Jocko Madigan]

Be in the jug.

[Inspector Hellman]

I'll see you later. I got work to do.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, it's getting late. You better put the boys back in the cage.

I began to worry after Hellman left. There was no murder gun and he didn't have too much to go on. But was no one else wanted my job. I knew the girl was going to have an alibi. And I was the last guy that Jackie Greg had seen. I had about as much chance as a fat girl at a Princeton prom. Hellman didn't like me. And he was a smart cop with a disposition like a ton of rhubarb.

Had to start right from scratch. I felt like Adam the first morning he woke up. So I looked up a guy named Jocko Madigan. An ex doctor and a boozer who will give you a lift if you show him where the stirrups are. A good guy, but he thinks all food makes a gurgle. I hit all the bars and finally found him up at Maggie Nielsen's apartment. She's a good looking voice that lives up on the hill. And Jocko was working his way into her liquor supply.

[Jocko Madigan]

Hello, Patsy. You're just in time to join me for my first drink of the evening. Or one of my first at least.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, I see it.

[Jocko Madigan]

Maggie's not here, but I found a whiskey. It was in plain sight, locked in the closet under some newspapers.

[Pat Novak]

All right, Jocko. When are you gonna sober up?

[Jocko Madigan]

I plan to do it briefly on April 1. When the rest of the world plays the fool.

[Pat Novak]

Also, I'm in trouble, Jocko. You gotta help me.

[Inspector Hellman]

Good.

[Jocko Madigan]

I've got a special bottle I used to. Forget your troubles.

[Pat Novak]

Stop caressing that jug and listen to me. I'm in a jam, Patsy.

[Jocko Madigan]

There's nothing in nature so sad as a half empty bottle. It's like a broken vow or an unfulfilled promise in the skies. A falling star. Almost.

[Pat Novak]

All right, Jocko.

[Jocko Madigan]

A falling star. And you shrug, never realizing that a whole world has ended at that moment. A hundred million dreams, maybe. And you watch it fall and make an asinine wish. And that's all the good it does a star to fall. It gives some kid a chance to wish for a bicycle.

[Pat Novak]

You finished now, Jocko?

[Jocko Madigan]

Yes. What kind of trouble? Anything I could aggravate.

[Pat Novak]

I'm mixed up out of the track. A guy by the name of Jackie Gregg is dead and I don't look good. Hellman? Yeah. The guy's a jockey and he hired me to find a horse named Fleet Lady.

[Jocko Madigan]

Did you?

[Pat Novak]

The horse and the jockey ran a dead heat. But there's something funny about the whole deal.

[Jocko Madigan]

Did you talk to the jockey?

[Pat Novak]

Not enough.

[Jocko Madigan]

Patsy, you've got to break yourself of the habit of waiting until people are dead before you think of a question.

[Pat Novak]

Jocko, I want you to hit all the horse rooms. Find out what you can about the sixth race tomorrow. It's the Bonanza Handicap. And hurry up, will you?

[Jocko Madigan]

If it's the sixth race, why can't we wait a while?

[Pat Novak]

Start now. Get everything you can and call me. I'll leave a message at your place.

[Jocko Madigan]

Where are you going?

[Pat Novak]

I don't know. Maybe up to see the girl.

[Jocko Madigan]

Oh, Patsy, you're going to be waving at the hangman's wife when they spring the trap door.

[Pat Novak]

I gotta see her. She owns Fleet Lady.

[Jocko Madigan]

Why don't I see her?

[Pat Novak]

She's got a stake somewhere. I got a lot of questions. What could you do? Up there?

[Jocko Madigan]

Yes. If it weren't an academic question, I'd argue the point.

[Pat Novak]

Looked like a bum deal right from the start.

[Jocko Madigan]

Oh, Patsy, you have the instinct for recognizing trouble, but not the intelligence to duck it.

[Pat Novak]

Jocko, will you get out to those horse parlors? I need facts, not fables. Now give me a hand.

[Jocko Madigan]

All right. Give me my love to Fleet Lady.

[Pat Novak]

Her name's Sybil Thornton.

[Jocko Madigan]

Well, I'll bet I'm not far wrong. Good night, lover.

[Pat Novak]

After I left Jocko, I went to the Chronicle morgue and looked up Paul Stangle. We pulled out the clips on Sybil Thornton. They were nice and fat because she'd been to Reno four times and hadn't broke training for years. She'd been traded around more than a Red Sox pitcher. The clippings said that she was 32. There were a lot of pictures, and from her eyes we got the idea she was around 35. But there were arguments the other way, too. There weren't any stories on her for the last few months. Just a few items from the columns. They all said the same thing. She was hitting the night spots with a gambler named Rudy Houser. Her pictures of him, too. He would have looked real good in a cave with heavy curtains. I asked Paul. He said Hauser had a gambling place out on Geary. So I took a cab out there for 10 bucks. The guy at the door said Sybil Thorne had left the place an hour ago. That made me feel good. When Hauser opened the door to his office, I lost the glow.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah? What's with you?

[Pat Novak]

I got a problem.

[Inspector Hellman]

You got the wrong door.

[Pat Novak]

You can't get any tougher, so I'm coming in.

[Inspector Hellman]

Suit yourself. I never throw anybody out until I'm sure they've lost all their money. What's on your mind?

[Pat Novak]

A horse named Fleet lady. She disappeared at 7:00 tonight.

[Inspector Hellman]

You check under the rug. I'll try the cabin.

[Pat Novak]

She got back just in time to greet somebody's gunsel.

[Inspector Hellman]

If I say no, will you go out and lose your money like a good boy?

[Pat Novak]

Fleet lady was owned by a gal named Sybil Thornton. The columns say you're number five on her list.

[Inspector Hellman]

And they never lie. The whiskey's too good.

[Pat Novak]

Also a little bird say she was in your office an hour ago.

[Inspector Hellman]

That's right. She said your name's Novak.

The next time you get a bombshell, give it a test run.

[Pat Novak]

With Flea lady dead, your money's gonna look good in the six tomorrow.

[Inspector Hellman]

What makes you think that gal would throw a race?

[Pat Novak]

For the same reason she goes out with you, huh? When a gal takes a Great Dane like you out in public, it generally means the guy's a few bucks ahead of her.

[Inspector Hellman]

You want to fight the team now, Novak? Just remember, sometimes you can't be right in the gentleman, too.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah? I hope that's the way you feel when they pick you up for Jackie Gregg's murder, huh? Oh, you do a real nice double take. The jockey checked out with a horse.

[Inspector Hellman]

I didn't know that. No?

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, with no brains you built this gambling club.

[Inspector Hellman]

I didn't know that he was dead. I told you that, Novak. And I meant it was all right for a little punk.

[Pat Novak]

Hey, this is Sarah. Look, I'm standing out front of a.m. p.m. Right now. And, well, you're sweet and all, but I found something more fulfilling. Even kind of cheesy. But I like it. Sure, you met some of my dietary needs, but they've just got it all. So farewell.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Oatmeal.

[Pat Novak]

So long, you strange soggy.

[Inspector Hellman]

Break up with bland breakfast and taste.

[Pat Novak]

AMPM's bacon, egg and cheese biscuit made.

[Inspector Hellman]

With K Tree eggs, smoked bacon and melty cheese on a buttery biscuit. A.m. p. M. Too much. Good stuff.

[Narrator/Announcer]

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[Inspector Hellman]

I'm sorry is dead.

[Pat Novak]

So is he. I'll see you later. Hauser. I got a nose around and find out where you were tonight.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah, you seem all right, Novak, so I'll tell you if you got any dough left when you leave my table. It's better than a horse named Fleet lady in the sixth race tomorrow.

[Pat Novak]

You always bet on a dead horse?

[Inspector Hellman]

You got the tip? Use it or bury it. But don't loan it out.

[Pat Novak]

Oh, the case was a regular grab bag. When I walked out of houses, I began to tick off the things that didn't add up. First on the list was that van down on the waterfront. If it was Fleet lady who got shot in the stable, if it was the ringer, that meant Fleet lady had run tomorrow. I couldn't figure out why Hauser was so sure she'd win. An idea kept racing around in the back of my mind like an ant in a cookie factory. Jackie Greg lied about that van down on the waterfront. But why? Not to bail me out of the poor house with 200 bucks? I got part of the answer when I stopped by the pay telephone and called Hellman.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah, Hellman talking.

[Pat Novak]

This is Novak. I got some news.

[Inspector Hellman]

You'll have to put it on the back page.

[Pat Novak]

What do you got?

[Inspector Hellman]

Your friend Jackie Greg had some love life.

[Pat Novak]

Well, there's a chance for you, Hellman. Who's the girl? Sybil Thornton.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah, we found a picture in his wallet. The gooey kind.

[Pat Novak]

I'll bet you stole it for long train rides. What time did he die?

[Inspector Hellman]

The right fit for you. Between nine and ten o'. Clock. Two shots from a.32 caliber pistol.

[Pat Novak]

How about the horse?45 caliber. Two people. It's getting involved.

[Inspector Hellman]

Maybe, maybe not. You got two hands, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

Look up a guy named Rudy Hauser. He's got a joint out on Geary Street.

[Inspector Hellman]

I got enough friends. You look him up.

[Pat Novak]

I did. He's still talking about Fleet lady and tomorrow's race.

[Inspector Hellman]

All right, maybe he's sentimental. Look, Novak, I'll pick out my own work. I don't need free help from you, Jackie. Greg paid 200 bucks and look what he got.

[Pat Novak]

Suit yourself. But Rudy Howser and that gal are close friends. Yeah, like two part harmony in a telephone booth. Now, get off the dime, Hellman. Hauser's got that gal in his hip pocket. She owns Fleet lady and he's betting her to win.

[Inspector Hellman]

You're trying hard, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

It's got to be a slow field to lose to a dead horse. Wake up, Hellman. You couldn't smell a rat in a basement full of cheese.

[Inspector Hellman]

I did all right in your apartment, huh? That.32 caliber pistol. We found it up at your place. See you later.

[Pat Novak]

Well, I wasn't too worried about that. Hellman's smart enough to know a phony.

I began to think about that.32 caliber pistol. It's a woman's weapon. But that doesn't prove anything. So's a bread knife if she's in a bad mood. Must have been about midnight when I got to Sybil Thornton's place.

She was wearing black lounging pajamas tied tight around a slim waist. She looked like a wasp with a nice sting when she had company.

[Sybil Thornton]

Come in. Mr. Novak? Yeah.

Mr. Novak, this is Ronnie Stark.

[Inspector Hellman]

Hello, Novak.

He's not very friendly, Sybil.

[Sybil Thornton]

He's just pouting because they're going to arrest him for Jackie's murder.

[Pat Novak]

How do you like Hellman?

[Sybil Thornton]

You've known him longer.

[Pat Novak]

Well, somebody left the murder gun up at my place. Where you been all night?

[Sybil Thornton]

Please, Mr. Novak, you're embarrassing Ronnie.

[Inspector Hellman]

That's right. I'm blushing. And it's not the whiskey, Novak.

[Sybil Thornton]

I see you must stay longer, Ronnie.

[Inspector Hellman]

She's persuasive on Novak. I'll see you tomorrow.

[Sybil Thornton]

You won't forget, Ronnie?

[Inspector Hellman]

No, I won't forget.

Oh, I'm betting on you, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

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[Inspector Hellman]

Start your free trial today.

[Pat Novak]

What won't he forget?

[Sybil Thornton]

Mr. Novak? I hope nobody ever asks you that question.

[Pat Novak]

You don't want to talk about putting that gun in my apartment?

[Sybil Thornton]

No.

[Pat Novak]

Let's talk about Rudy Hauser, then. Your meat grinder friend. We just had a good talk and he opened up a new road.

[Sybil Thornton]

What'd you tell him?

[Pat Novak]

Don't break a spring. He's all right.

[Sybil Thornton]

Will you do me a favor, Patsy?

[Pat Novak]

Like not talking to Hauser anymore, huh?

[Sybil Thornton]

That's right. Won't do you any good, Patsy, and it'll do me a lot of good.

[Pat Novak]

How's he gonna know which horse got killed? I'll bet you lied to him. Angel.

[Sybil Thornton]

It's my applecot. Patsy. Leave it alone.

[Pat Novak]

Sure, but play your hand right, baby, because I'm gonna watch your cards. And if you got one that says Jackie Greg, I'm gonna call you the hard way, too.

[Sybil Thornton]

Patsy, you're a nice beast. I really think you would. Sit down.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah.

[Sybil Thornton]

Drink? Well, do you good?

[Pat Novak]

Not right now.

[Sybil Thornton]

Where? You've read the book?

[Pat Novak]

Just a couple of chapters.

[Sybil Thornton]

Bet they're the right ones.

[Pat Novak]

You better watch out, baby. I may be a long shot.

[Sybil Thornton]

Well, you care? As long as I bet I don't. That's good. I didn't think you'd mind.

[Pat Novak]

All right, angel, it's time to wire the folks.

[Sybil Thornton]

Mr. Novak, just whether you know any better.

[Pat Novak]

That's from me. I left the number.

[Sybil Thornton]

It's your fault.

[Jocko Madigan]

Yeah.

[Inspector Hellman]

Hello, Patsy.

[Pat Novak]

What'd you find out, Jocko?

[Jocko Madigan]

Not much. Nobody seems to care about the sixth race.

[Pat Novak]

I care about it.

[Jocko Madigan]

That's because you killed one of the jockeys. The rest of the people have a more casual interest.

[Pat Novak]

How do the odds run?

[Jocko Madigan]

No heavy favorites. Vinair and Sleepy Time Gal figured to be the best at around 5 to 1.

[Pat Novak]

What about fleet Lady?

[Jocko Madigan]

Down the line somewhere. I talked to one fellow. He says she's a dog and couldn't beat a paralytic goose over a hundred yards.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, what else?

[Jocko Madigan]

That's all.

[Pat Novak]

What do you mean, that's all? Start digging, Jocko. We're not getting anyplace.

[Jocko Madigan]

Not even at your end, huh? I counted on you to do better than that. Right, lover?

[Pat Novak]

On the way home, I bought the morning papers. There was a story on Jackie Greg. No details. Most of the story was a statement by Hellman on Hellman. There was no mention of Fleet Lady. And at one o' clock in the morning there was nothing I could do but roll into bed. I woke up about nine and called Jocko. It was like sending a message out to the Farallones by Indian Runner. He just muttered and said he'd meet me out at the track. I had to have some more dope, so I call Ira Snow. He calls the races and bets on them. The way he does it, a horse is a real beast of burden. He was playing elf when I got him on the wire. Yeah, Ira, this is Novak. What do you know about the Bonanza Handicap?

[Inspector Hellman]

It's a horse race.

[Pat Novak]

Oh, you're funny. What about the field? Are the horses any good? For hamburgers, maybe Nothing else. How about Fleet Lady?

[Jocko Madigan]

Eastern track?

[Pat Novak]

Nobody knows. Would she be worth a heavy plunge? If you want to be a monk.

[Inspector Hellman]

What's this all about?

[Pat Novak]

I'm in trouble. How about a fix? Could they run in a ringer on Fleet Lady? It's been done before, but it ain't easy. That's what I figured. How's Rudy Howser on horses? He ain't. He got burned a long time ago.

[Inspector Hellman]

He never bets.

[Pat Novak]

I think you're wrong. Look, Novak, I know every guy in town that's got the itch.

[Inspector Hellman]

Rudy Howser?

[Pat Novak]

No. You know a guy named Ronnie Stark? Sure.

[Inspector Hellman]

Runs a book.

[Pat Novak]

Why? Nothing. I may see you at the track. I'm gonna make a bet.

[Inspector Hellman]

Yeah, I'll tell the horses.

[Pat Novak]

Well, that left me in a hole. If Ira was right, Rudy Hauser on Fleet lady didn't make a bit of sense. I got out to the track about 2:30. Jocko was there and Hellman was wandering around up in the grandstand where they couldn't push him into a starting gate. Sybil Thornton waved from her box as I moved over to get a better shot at the starting line for the sixth. They were almost at the post when Jocko came back from the betting window.

[Jocko Madigan]

Well, Patsy, I bet $2 on a horse called Scotch Victory. It seemed like a good omen. Yeah, I saw your friend Rudy Houser at the window. He was pouring money down on the favorites to win.

[Pat Novak]

That's why the odds have gone down on Vin Air and Sleepy Time Gal.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Look at that board.

[Jocko Madigan]

Yes, Fleet Lady's gone all the way up to 12 to 1.

[Pat Novak]

Yeah, from 8 to 1 all the way up.

[Jocko Madigan]

Maybe the word got around. She's dead.

[Pat Novak]

No, that's the funny part. She's down there. Number three on the rail, see? Not a peep out of anybod.

[Inspector Hellman]

Hot Weather is going to the front by wrong length.

[Jocko Madigan]

Sleepy Time Gal by ahead.

[Inspector Hellman]

Fleet lady, between horses, is running third. By one length. On the outside, it's Been Air and All Soldier by two lengths. Going into the clubhouse turn, it's Hot Weather by two lengths. Sleepy Time Gal by a half length. Fleet lady is moving up. On the outside, it's Thin Air, fourth by one length.

[Jocko Madigan]

Fleet lady runs well for a ghost. Yeah, Rudy, how's it? Better hurry or he won't see much, huh? He better hurry. He left the track 10 minutes ago.

[Pat Novak]

Are you sure, Jocko?

[Jocko Madigan]

Yes. I heard him tell someone he had to make a phone call just before the betting closed.

[Pat Novak]

Well, Jocko, you're a sweetheart.

[Jocko Madigan]

I like.

[Pat Novak]

Let's go to the stable.

[Jocko Madigan]

Well, the race isn't over.

[Pat Novak]

It was over five minutes ago.

[Jocko Madigan]

How about my $2?

[Pat Novak]

Come on, will you? There's only one person who won't try to fix a horse race. That's a horse.

I knew there was going to be trouble fast. The horses were just coming under the wire when I waved to Hellman and started for the stable. When we got there, Sybil Thornton was clearing out like a fire sale.

[Sybil Thornton]

I'm in a hurry, Patsy, darling, let me buy.

[Pat Novak]

No, you made a bad play, Angel.

[Jocko Madigan]

Stick around.

[Sybil Thornton]

Let me buy, Patsy.

[Inspector Hellman]

You heard him, lad. Around. Thanks, Copper. I'll take charge.

[Pat Novak]

That's a big gun, Howser.

[Inspector Hellman]

I got up big deep. They let me drop a hundred grand.

[Sybil Thornton]

Siblings was your idea, Rudy.

[Inspector Hellman]

Not this way. You let me drop a hundred grand because you ran Fleet Lady.

[Sybil Thornton]

Program said Fleet lady, and that's who ran.

[Inspector Hellman]

I brought those odds into line at the window. My other 80 looked bad on Fleet Lady. You didn't stay to watch a trail the field.

[Sybil Thornton]

All right, I didn't stay. You lost your hundred grand. You killed a ringer. You were a smart big shot who was gonna sew up the race.

[Inspector Hellman]

The Ram, Fleet lady and cost me a hundred grand. All right, copper, move away from her. Over this way, Sybil.

[Sybil Thornton]

No, don't let him do it, Patsy.

[Pat Novak]

I want to see how tough you are.

[Inspector Hellman]

Come on, Civil. Let Shoe and me move over against the stall.

[Pat Novak]

Watch out, Howser. You're backing into the horse.

[Inspector Hellman]

Grab the horse, Novak. He's gonna trample him.

[Pat Novak]

You grab him. It's your idea.

[Sybil Thornton]

Is he dead?

[Pat Novak]

Yeah.

Should have learned the first time you can't beat the horses.

[Inspector Hellman]

That's a bum joke, Novak.

[Pat Novak]

I guess it is.

[Inspector Hellman]

Now that we're all here, who do we book for? Jackie Greg's murder? I'll answer that. One, friend. Who's this guy?

[Pat Novak]

One. You missed, Hellman. Hello, Stark.

[Inspector Hellman]

I ain't Novak. What are you Waiting for Sybil. Tell the man you killed Jackie. Greg.

[Sybil Thornton]

I've had enough trouble today.

[Inspector Hellman]

Ronnie, you got more coming. You figured it out. Get Novak.

[Pat Novak]

Houser dumped his 80 grand on you.

[Inspector Hellman]

That's right. It's a lot of spending money.

[Sybil Thornton]

Wait a minute, Ronnie. I don't like this.

[Inspector Hellman]

You'll get your half, baby. I'm gonna write out an iou. And when they book you for murder and the vote's in, you can't use it.

[Sybil Thornton]

Who wouldn't do a thing like that, Rummy?

[Inspector Hellman]

A dead girl can't spend 40 grand. She killed your guy, copper, and tried to palm it off on Novak. I was there, so I'll testify.

[Sybil Thornton]

Ronnie, you're a no good guy.

[Inspector Hellman]

Don't be silly. I love justice. Well, book her for murder, copper. I want to tear up that iou.

[Pat Novak]

Well, Hellman finally worked it out. Started out as a fixed race, and when they were all through, it was up to the horse. Rudy Hauser put the squeeze on Sybil for some dough. She offered to run a fast ringer in place of Fleet lady so Hauser could pick up a bag full. Rudy just wanted to make sure. So he sent one of his boys around to knock off Fleet Lady. Only the guy killed the ringer instead. It was a break for Sybil. She made a deal with a bookie named Ronnie Stark to take all of Hauser's bets and guaranteed him that Fleet lady couldn't win because she wasn't that good a horse. It panned out that way. She let Hauser think Fleet lady was dead. He spent 20 grand at the window pushing up the odds on Fleet lady and dumped another 80 on her to win.

A moving van. It was a phony story Greg used to get me to scare Sybil he wanted in on the deal. He went back to the stable that night, gotten a beef. She killed him. She had him out in her car. When I went to make that phone call, she figured it was a good way to pass the buck.

Well, Hellman asked only one question.

Why would a nice, tame horse go crazy and trample a man to death?

Jocko had the answer. The horse that killed Hauser was a filly.

[Inspector Hellman]

The Armed Forces Radio Service has just brought you Pat Novak for hire, starring Jack Webb. Pat Novak is produced by William P. Russo. Jocko Madigan is played by Tudor Owen. Inspector Hellman is played by Raymond Burr. Music was composed and conducted by Basil Adnum. Be with us again next week when over most of these same stations we'll bring you Pat Novak for Higher.

Fat Novak for Hire was previously released by abc, the American Broadcasting Company, for listeners in the United States, and rebroadcast for our men and women overseas. This is the United States Armed Forces Radio Service, the voice of information and education.

[Narrator/Announcer]

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