Sherlock Holmes: The Illustrious Client (Langford & Baker)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Sherlock Holmes: The Illustrious Client (Langford & Baker)"

Introduction and Setting

Sherlock Holmes: The Illustrious Client opens with the familiar camaraderie between Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson, setting the stage in a Turkish bath—a favorite relaxation spot for the duo. Their light-hearted banter ([02:02]-[04:00]) introduces listeners to their dynamic relationship and Holmes' sharp observational skills.

The Case Introduction

The tranquility is interrupted when Sir James Damery arrives, presenting a letter that solicits Holmes' expertise ([03:01]-[04:00]). The letter underscores the delicate nature of the matter, emphasizing its importance and the need for discretion. Holmes, intrigued by the esteemed Damery's reputation for handling sensitive affairs, agrees to take on the case despite initial reservations about the anonymity and mystery surrounding the client's true intentions.

Notable Quote:

Sherlock Holmes ([03:30]): "He has rather a reputation for arranging delicate matters which are to be kept out of the papers."

Details of the Case

Damery elucidates the core of the predicament: General de Merville's daughter, Violet, is ensnared in a potentially disastrous romantic entanglement with Baron Gruner, an Austrian with a notorious past ([07:04]-[08:59]). Despite Violet's affections, there are murky elements in Gruner's history, notably his involvement in a murder case in Prague—the so-called "Austrian episode" ([08:16]-[09:13]). The General, weakened and emotionally distraught, is unable to intervene effectively, exacerbating the urgency to avert a looming tragedy.

Notable Quote:

Dr. John Watson ([05:35]): "It's a terrible thing, Mr. Holmes, to see a dreadful event, an atrocious situation preparing itself before your eyes and yet be utterly unable to avert it."

Gathering Intelligence

Holmes strategizes to infiltrate the underworld circles Gruner frequents by enlisting Shinwell Johnson, a reformed ruffian with unparalleled access to nightclubs, gambling dens, and other shadowy establishments ([10:09]-[12:38]). This alliance aims to unearth critical information that could sway Violet's affections or expose Gruner's dubious past.

Notable Quote:

Sherlock Holmes ([11:15]): "He has the entree of every nightclub, doss house and gambling den in the city."

Confrontation with Gruner and Discovery

Holmes takes a bold step by confronting Baron Gruner directly at his residence, Vernon Lodge near Kingston ([13:00]-[15:36]). Through a tense dialogue, Gruner reveals his manipulative nature and attempts to undermine Holmes' intervention by threatening repercussions. Simultaneously, Kitty Winter, an old acquaintance with personal vendettas against Gruner, surfaces as a pivotal ally. She divulges the existence of a damning book authored by Gruner, which catalogs his manipulative conquests and criminal deeds ([18:07]-[19:11]).

Notable Quote:

Kitty Winter ([18:07]): "I know a few things. And there's that book of his."

Action and Resolution

The narrative intensifies as Holmes orchestrates a setup to expose Gruner's true nature. Disguised as Dr. Hill Barton, Watson engages Gruner in a discussion about Chinese ceramics, a hobby that Gruner himself indulges in. This ruse effectively lures Gruner into a vulnerable position. During the encounter, Kitty Winter confronts Gruner with the evidence, leading to a violent altercation ([31:27]-[32:15]). Holmes sustains injuries defending himself, but the culmination sees Gruner disfigured and Violet freed from his manipulative grip.

Notable Quote:

Sherlock Holmes ([32:05]): "The wages of sin, Watson, the wages of sin."

Conclusion

In the aftermath, the true identity of the illustrious client is revealed—Sir James Damery himself ([34:27]). His chivalrous intervention ensures Violet's safety and reaffirms the integrity of Holmes and Watson's detective prowess. The episode concludes with a reflection on the effectiveness of their methods and the restoration of order.

Notable Quote:

Dr. John Watson ([34:09]): "He's a chivalrous gentleman and a loyal friend to a lady in great danger."

Additional Highlights

• Character Development: The episode delves into the complexities of Baron Gruner's character, portraying him as a sophisticated yet morally bankrupt antagonist. Holmes' strategic maneuvers and swift adaptability are prominently showcased.

• Themes: Central themes include the battle between deception and truth, the moral responsibilities of intervening in others' affairs, and the intricate dance of human emotions in the face of manipulation.

• Notable Interactions: The alliance with Shinwell Johnson and the introduction of Kitty Winter add depth to the narrative, highlighting the interconnectedness of Holmes' investigations within the broader societal fabric.

Cast:

• Robert Langford as Sherlock Holmes
• Kenneth Baker as Dr. John Watson
• Fiona Fraser, Gabriel Bayman, John Hayter, Bruce Anderson, and Louis Ice in supporting roles.

Conclusion

"Sherlock Holmes: The Illustrious Client" masterfully intertwines suspense, strategic detective work, and rich character interactions. Through intricate plotting and engaging dialogue, listeners are immersed in a classic Holmesian adventure that underscores the timeless appeal of deduction and moral righteousness.

Transcript

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[Sherlock Holmes]

Welcome to Choice Classic Radio where we bring to you the greatest old time radio shows like us on Facebook, subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for [e-mail] it's time for another episode.

[Dr. John Watson]

In the Sherlock Holmes series. And this one's called the Illustrious Client.

[Sherlock Holmes]

There's only one thing more pleasant than the Turkish bath itself. What's new?

[Dr. John Watson]

Yeah, what's that, Holmes?

[Sherlock Holmes]

The pleasant lassitude of the drying room. I never knew tobacco tastes pleasanter anywhere.

[Dr. John Watson]

Can't say it makes that shag of yours smell any better. Still, you're right about the drying room, Holmes. He does something for you. I mean, yes, get rid of some of your confounded reticence. Makes you. Well, I was going to say makes you more human.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Does it indeed? What I suppose you really mean, Watson, is that you Find it loosens my tongue and helps to satisfy that insatiable curiosity of yours, eh?

[Dr. John Watson]

Well I had thought of asking you whether you had anything of interest on hand at the moment.

[Sherlock Holmes]

And now you have asked. I think you will find your answer in those papers sticking out of my jacket pocket there.

[Dr. John Watson]

Where these?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Yes. To be more precise, it's a letter. You may read it if you wish.

[Dr. John Watson]

Thank you. Address? From the Carlton Club yesterday evening.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Yes.

[Dr. John Watson]

Sir James Damery presents his compliments to Mr. Sherlock Holmes and will call upon him at 4.30 to Morrow. Sir James begs to say that the matter upon which he desires to consult Mr. Holmes is very delicate and also very important. He Trusts therefore that Mr. Holmes will make every effort to grant this interview. Pretty formal, eh, Holmes?

[Sherlock Holmes]

How do you know of this man Damery?

[Dr. John Watson]

Only that his name's a household word in society.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I can tell you a little more than that. He has rather a reputation for arranging delicate matters which are to be kept out of the papers. You may remember his negotiations with Sir George Lewis over the Hammerford will case?

[Dr. John Watson]

Yes, yes I do.

[Sherlock Holmes]

He's a man of the world with a natural turn for diplomacy. I'm bound to hope therefore that this is not a false scent. He must have some real need of our assistance.

[Dr. John Watson]

Our assistance, Holmes?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Well, if you'll be so good, I shall be honoured. Then you have the hour. 4:30. Until then we can put the matter out of our heads. Come in, come in, Sir James. Welcome to my humble abode.

[Dr. John Watson]

Delighted, Mr. Holmes. Now this no doubt is Dr. Watson? Yes. How do you do, sir? I was prepared to find you here, Doctor. Mr. Holmes may find your collaboration very necessary, I fancy.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Indeed. Pray take the basket chair.

[Dr. John Watson]

Thank you.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Maze.

[Dr. John Watson]

Mr. Holmes, have you ever heard of Baron Gruner?

[Sherlock Holmes]

The Austrian murderers?

[Dr. John Watson]

Oh, there's no getting past you at all, Mr. Holmes. So you've sized him up as a murderer already?

[Sherlock Holmes]

It is my business to follow the details of continental crime. Who could possibly have read what happened in Prague and have any doubts about the man's guilt? It was a purely technical legal point in the death of a witness that saved him. I'm assure he killed his wife when that so called accident happened in the Spoogen Pass. As if I'd seen him do it.

[Dr. John Watson]

And many people would agree with you.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I also know that he has come to England. In fact I had a presentiment that sooner or later he would find some work for me to do. Well, what's he been up to? Not the old tragedy again?

[Dr. John Watson]

No more serious than that. To revenge crime is important, but to prevent it is more so.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Agreed.

[Dr. John Watson]

It's a terrible thing, Mr. Holmes, to see a dreadful event, an atrocious situation preparing itself before your eyes and yet be utterly unable to avert it. You all agree, Watson? Can a human being be placed in a more trying position? I hardly think so. Then you'll both sympathise with the client in whose interests I'm acting.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Oh, I didn't understand that you were merely an intermediary. Who is the principal.

[Dr. John Watson]

Mr. Holmes, I must beg you not to press that question. It is important that I should be able to assure him that his honoured name has in no way been dragged into the matter. His motives are honorable and chivalrous to the last degree and he prefers to remain unknown.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I am sorry, Sir James. I am accustomed to mystery at one end of my cases, but to have them at both ends is too confusing. I fear I must decline to act.

[Dr. John Watson]

You place me in a most serious dilemma. I am perfectly certain that you would be proud to take over the case if I could give you that one fact and yet a promise forbids me to reveal it. Well then, I'm afraid, Mr. Holmes, may I at least lay all that I can before you?

[Sherlock Holmes]

So long as it is understood that I commit myself to nothing that is.

[Dr. John Watson]

Understood in the first place. Then you've no doubt heard of General de Merville? De Merville of the Kyber Path? The same.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Yes, I've heard of him.

[Dr. John Watson]

He has a daughter, Violet. She's young, beautiful, accomplished and very rich. It is this daughter, Mr. Holmes, who we must save from the clutches of a fiend.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Baron Grunner has a hold over her.

[Dr. John Watson]

The strongest of all holds where a woman is concerned.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Love.

[Dr. John Watson]

As you may have heard, the fellow's extraordinarily handsome with a most fascinating manner. And all that air of romance and mystery. You know what I mean. The sort of thing that means so.

[Baron Gruner]

Much to a woman.

[Dr. John Watson]

They say there isn't one of them can resist him.

[Sherlock Holmes]

How did he come to meet a lady of Mr. Merville's standing?

[Dr. John Watson]

It was on a Mediterranean yachting cruise. The villain attached himself to her, won her heart just like that. She absolutely dotes on him. She's obsessed by him. In fact, outside of him there's nothing on earth for her. She won't hear a word against him. Everything's been done to cure her of it. And so, in short, she proposes to marry him next month.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I see.

[Dr. John Watson]

She has a will of iron when she's of age. It's so hard to Know what to do to prevent her.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Does she know about his past? The Austrian episode?

[Dr. John Watson]

The cunning devil's told her every bit of scantily's had a part in and he's done it in such a way that he always turns out to be the innocent martyr. Now she simply accepts his version of everything and listens to no other.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Very difficult indeed. But surely Sir James, in telling us all this you've inadvertently let out the.

[Dr. John Watson]

Name of your client, General Demervium. Well Mr. Holmes, I could deceive you perhaps by letting you think that, but it wouldn't be true. De Merville is a broken old man. His daughter is set on marrying a scheming adventurer. He could cut her off no doubt, but the money isn't the whole of.

[Baron Gruner]

It, it's her future happiness.

[Dr. John Watson]

Yes, quite, quite. Dr. Watson, the nerve that never failed him on the battlefield is gone, quite gone. The old man's utterly incapable of dealing with a brilliant rascal like this Austrian.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Your client? Very.

[Dr. John Watson]

All I dare say, Mr. Holmes, is that he's an old friend who's known the General intimately for years. He's taken a paternal interest in this young girl since she wore short frocks. And he can't see this tragedy acted out without some attempt to stop it. I can go no further than that, Sir James.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Your problem interests me. I shall be happy to look into it.

[Dr. John Watson]

Then I'm most deeply obliged to you. I felt sure that once you'd heard the facts. Now I mustn't detain you any longer.

[Sherlock Holmes]

How shall I keep in touch with you?

[Dr. John Watson]

My club will find me.

[Sherlock Holmes]

And the Baron's present address please.

[Baron Gruner]

Oh, of course.

[Dr. John Watson]

Vernon Lodge, near Kingston. It's a large place. He's been fortunate in some rather shady speculations. He's a rich man now, which I fancy makes him more dangerous as an antagonist than ever. Apart from what you've told me, can.

[Sherlock Holmes]

You give me anything further about him?

[Dr. John Watson]

Well, expensive taste, you know. Horse fancier. Collects books and pictures. Quite an artistic side to him, I believe. He's an authority on Chinese pottery and he wrote a book about it.

[Sherlock Holmes]

All great criminals have a complex mind. My old friend Charlie Peace was a violin virtuoso. Wainwright was no mean artist. I could quote you many more. Well, Sir James, you may inform your illustrious client that I am turning my mind upon Baron Gruner.

[Dr. John Watson]

Then I'll say good day to you gentlemen.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Good day.

[Dr. John Watson]

Good day, Sir James. And don't forget my cloth. Anytime.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Very well. Well, Watson, any views?

[Dr. John Watson]

I suppose you'll see the young lady herself?

[Sherlock Holmes]

My dear Watson, if her poor old broken father can't move her, what can a stranger expect to do? No, I think we must begin from a different angle. Perhaps Shinwold Johnson could help.

[Dr. John Watson]

Shinwold Johnson? That ruffian.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Ah Watson, repentance is a noble thing. Two terms in Parkhurst have worked wonders in Master Johnson.

[Dr. John Watson]

But how can he help?

[Sherlock Holmes]

He has the entree of every nightclub, doss house and gambling den in the city. This ruffian of yours, his two convictions have invested him with a certain glamour. He also has a quick eye and an active brain which I am happy to say have been placed at the disposal of the forces of law and order on more than one occasion.

[Dr. John Watson]

A knock then?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Not really. If he'd acted for the police he'd have been found out by now. Fortunately, however, he confines his attention to cases which never come directly into the courts. I tell you what Watson, we'll meet for dinner this evening at our place in the Strand, eh?

[Dr. John Watson]

Meanwhile, I'll have a word or two.

[Sherlock Holmes]

With Master Shinwold Johnson. Capital soup never varies. Thank heaven.

[Dr. John Watson]

Never mind the soup, Holmes. You have a particularly nasty delight in keeping me waiting for your new.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Have I? Well there's nothing much to tell. Johnson is on the prowl for us. He may pick up some useful garbage in the darker recesses of the underworld.

[Dr. John Watson]

But surely if the lady won't accept what's already known about Baron Gruner, why should anything we can find out change her mind?

[Sherlock Holmes]

For her, who knows? Woman's heart and mind are insoluble puzzles to the male. Murder might be condoned or explained. And yet some smaller offense may rankle Baron Gruner remarked to me.

[Dr. John Watson]

Gruner remarked to you?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Oh, to be sure. You know how I love to come to grips with my man. I like to meet him eye to eye and read for myself what stuff is made of. When I'd given Johnson his orders I took a cab out to Kingston. I found the Baron in an affable mood.

[Dr. John Watson]

Did he recognize you?

[Sherlock Holmes]

There was no difficulty about that. I sent him my card. He received me at once.

[Baron Gruner]

I rather thought I should see you sooner or later. You have been engaged, no doubt by General de Melville to try to stop my marriage with his daughter Violet. Is it not so?

[Sherlock Holmes]

As you wish.

[Baron Gruner]

My dear man, let me tell you.

[Dr. John Watson]

At once you will only ruin your.

[Baron Gruner]

Well deserved reputation, to say nothing of incurring some danger. Let me strongly advise you to draw off at once.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Curiously enough, that was the very advice I had intended giving you. I have A respect for your brains, Baron. And the little I've seen of your personality has not lessened it. But let me put it to you as man to man.

[Dr. John Watson]

Very well.

[Sherlock Holmes]

No one wants to rake up your past. It is over, and you are now in smooth waters. But if you persist in this adventurous marriage, you will raise up a swarm of powerful enemies who will never leave you alone until they have made England too hot to hold you. I ask you, is the game worth it?

[Baron Gruner]

Oh, dear.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Excuse my amusement, Mr. Holmes, but it.

[Baron Gruner]

Really is funny to see you trying to play a hand with no cards in it at all. I don't think anyone could do better, but it's rather pathetic all the same. Not a color card there, Mr. Holmes. Nothing but the smallest of the small.

[Sherlock Holmes]

If you choose to think so, I know.

[Baron Gruner]

Now, let me make this thing clear to you, for my own hand is so strong that I can afford to show it. I have been fortunate enough to win the entire affection of this lady. This has been given to me in spite of the fact that I told her clearly of all the unhappy incidents in my past life. I also told her that certain wicked and designing persons, I hope you recognize yourself, would come to her and tell her these things. And I warned her how to treat them.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Then there is nothing more to be said. If you will excuse me, I will wish you a day, Baron Gunner.

[Dr. John Watson]

Certainly.

[Baron Gruner]

The pleasure has been all mine. Before you go, though, Mr. Holmes.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Well?

[Baron Gruner]

Did you know Le Brun, the French agent?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Yes, I knew him.

[Baron Gruner]

Do you know what happened to him?

[Sherlock Holmes]

I heard he was beaten by some appassion mamach and crippled for night.

[Baron Gruner]

Quite true. By a curious coincidence, he had been inquiring into my affairs only a week before. Don't do it, Mr. Holmes. It is not a lucky thing to do.

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[Sherlock Holmes]

So there you are, Watson. You are up to date at last.

[Dr. John Watson]

A fellow who seems dangerous enough.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Mighty dangerous. I disregard the blusterer, but this is the sort of man who says rather less than he means.

[Dr. John Watson]

Must you interfere? I mean to say, does it matter so much if he does marry the Girl, they're free to choose after all.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Considering that he undoubtedly murdered his last wife, I should say it mattered very much. Our illustrious client evidently thinks so too. But come along, drink up your coffee and come home with me. Our friend Shinwell will be waiting for us there.

[Dr. John Watson]

Gentlemen, allow me to introduce Ms. Kitty.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Winter, who I took the liberty of bringing along of me. What she don't know, that she can speak for herself.

[Kitty Winter]

Yes, we're old mates and well and mean, mister. Same address, almost hell. London, that's it. Finds us every time. But there's a chap who ought to be down in a lower ell than us. If there's any justice in the world, I'll tell you.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I gather we have your good wishes in our little investigation, Ms. Winter.

[Kitty Winter]

Oh, I'll say so. If I can't help put Adelbert Gruner where he belongs, I'm yours to the rack.

[Sherlock Holmes]

You know him, then?

[Kitty Winter]

My past neither here nor there, but what I am. Gruner maiden. Straight.

[Sherlock Holmes]

He did as Shinwell told you how the matter stands? I have, sir, left nothing out. The lady is madly in love with him as Winters. She's been told everything about him, but she cares nothing.

[Kitty Winter]

Told about the murder. Yes, she must have a nerve.

[Sherlock Holmes]

She puts it all down as lies.

[Kitty Winter]

Can't you show a proof?

[Baron Gruner]

What proofs?

[Kitty Winter]

Well, ain't I a proof meself? If I went and told her how.

[Dr. John Watson]

He used me, would you do that? Would I?

[Kitty Winter]

There's one or two more murders than the one that made such a fuss. I know a few things. And there's that book of his.

[Sherlock Holmes]

A book?

[Kitty Winter]

I tell you, mister, that man collects women like anyone collects butterflies or moths. And they're all in that book, all the details, names, snapshots, things you wouldn't believe any man could write down that'd show her a thing or two. And I know where he keeps it.

[Dr. John Watson]

How can you know that now?

[Kitty Winter]

Well, leastways I know where he always did keep it. Special place he had in a big cabinet thing where he keeps a lot of his Chinese Crockery.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Very interesting, Ms. Winter. Very interesting indeed. I think I shall take advantage of your offer to confront the lady in question with what you know. As for the book, I think we'll keep that to ourselves for the time being. Then if all else fails, Watson, tomorrow morning, Ms. Winter and I will pay our call on Mr. Melville. Be good enough to meet me for lunch afterwards and I'll post you up. I'll place the Strand will do. Again, I think.

[Dr. John Watson]

Sherlock Holme detecting Regent Street. Hyperp. Here my boy. Hey you. Charlene. Sir. All right, all right. Keep the change. So very much governor. Hyper. Hyperp. Murderous attack on famous detective. Good heavens. Mr. Sherlock Holmes, a well known detective. Victim murderous assault attacked about 12 o' clock Regent Street. Two men armed with sticks beaten about the head injuries. Doctors describe a serious taken Charing Cross hospital afterwards insisted taken to his own room here cabin cabin. As quick as you can man. 221B Baker Street. Go for your.

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[Sherlock Holmes]

Why, it isn't old Watson.

[Dr. John Watson]

You've been with him, sir. Leslie. How is he? Oh, no immediate danger. You know, a couple of lacerated scalp.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Wounds, good deal of bruising.

[Dr. John Watson]

Can I see him?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Oh, I wouldn't do any harm for a few minutes.

[Dr. John Watson]

It's a tough sort of character, you know. Don't stay too long.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I must be dashing. It took me up sometime.

[Dr. John Watson]

Yes, yes, further. It.

[Sherlock Holmes]

All right? Watson, My dear fellow, don't look so scared. It's not as bad as it seems.

[Dr. John Watson]

Thank heaven for that.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I'm not so bad at single stick myself. Took most of them on my guard. It was the second fellow who was too much for me.

[Dr. John Watson]

The papers say they got away.

[Sherlock Holmes]

They were well prepared. The police no Wait a little. Oh, I have my plans. The first thing is to exaggerate my injuries.

[Dr. John Watson]

Who do? Everyone.

[Sherlock Holmes]

They'll come to you for news. Late on thick. Lucky if I live the week out. Concussion, delirium, you can't overdo it.

[Dr. John Watson]

And Sir Leslie Oakeshott?

[Sherlock Holmes]

I'll look after him. He'll see the worst side of me. Anything else? Tell Shinwell Johnson to get that girl Kitty Winter out of the way. If they dare to do me in, it's not likely they'll neglect her. That's urgent, Watson.

[Dr. John Watson]

Right. I'll go now.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Right. Oh, and put out my pipe on the table, will you? And the tobacco.

[Dr. John Watson]

Come in each morning and we'll plan our campaign. Well, Holmes, you are looking better.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Sir Leslie took out my stitches today. Just seven days to recover. Not bad, eh?

[Dr. John Watson]

Tonight's papers say you've developed Eric Syphilis.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Capital, my dear fellow. I shall enjoy having that very much.

[Dr. John Watson]

No, seriously though, Holmes, I have some news you won't find so amusing.

[Sherlock Holmes]

What?

[Dr. John Watson]

Baron Gruner sailed from Liverpool on Friday. Same to the States, important business to settle before his impending marriage. Etc. Etc.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Friday? Only three more days. Yes, mark my words, he wants to put himself out of harm's way until the last moment. But he won't, Watson. By the Lord Harry, he won't. Now listen.

[Dr. John Watson]

Yes?

[Sherlock Holmes]

I want you to do something for me.

[Dr. John Watson]

I'm here to be used.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Well then, spend the next 24 hours studying Chinese pottery.

[Dr. John Watson]

Studying Chinese pottery?

[Sherlock Holmes]

An intensive study. Your friend Lomax of the London Library shall be just the man to help. Now, no questions, off you go to your crammer. I'll see you here tomorrow evening.

[Dr. John Watson]

Well, Holmes, I shall never be able to believe newspapers again after this. They say you're dying.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Well done, Watson. Now as you see, I'm on my legs again and feeling none the worse. And now Watson, have you learned your lessons well?

[Dr. John Watson]

As best I can.

[Sherlock Holmes]

It's a big subject, Chinese ceramics in 24 hours. Granted. The point is, could you keep up an intelligent conversation on the subject?

[Dr. John Watson]

Oh, I think so. For a while anyway.

[Sherlock Holmes]

And pray hand me that little box from the mantelpiece.

[Dr. John Watson]

Yes, certainly.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Thank you. Now take a look at this. I say this is the real eggshell pottery of the Ming dynasty. No finer piece ever passed through the sale rooms. A complete set would be worth a king's ransom. In fact, I doubt if there's one in existence outside the Imperial palace in Peking.

[Dr. John Watson]

Exquisite.

[Sherlock Holmes]

The sight of this would drive a real connoisseur wild. You'll have to handle it Carefully, Ay, chef, I should say Dr. Hill Barton of 369 Half Moon street must handle it carefully. That's your name for this evening, Watson. Here's a visiting card I've had prepared for you.

[Dr. John Watson]

And what is Dr. Hill Barton to do?

[Sherlock Holmes]

At half past eight you will call upon Baron Gruner. An appointment has been made saying you are bringing with you a specimen of an absolutely unique set of Mings. You may as well be a medical man. You'll make your part easier to play. You're a collector. This piece has come your way. You've heard of the Baron's interest in the subject and you are not averse to selling at a price?

[Dr. John Watson]

At what price?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Well asked. Watson, you would certainly fall down badly if you didn't know the value of your own wares. Actually, this saucer was got for me by Sir James Damery. You will not be exaggerating if you suggest it could hardly be matched in the world today.

[Dr. John Watson]

Then I could suggest that the set be valued by an expert. Excellent.

[Sherlock Holmes]

You know, you're positively scintillating today.

[Dr. John Watson]

Thank you.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Your delicacy prevents you putting a price on it yourself. What could be more natural?

[Dr. John Watson]

What if he won't see me after all?

[Sherlock Holmes]

Oh yes, he will. No more instructions, my dear chap. We will let the interview take care of itself.

[Baron Gruner]

Pray Sit down, Dr. Barton. I was just looking over my own treasures and wondering whether I could really afford to add to them. This little Tang specimen from the 7th century will interest you, I'm sure.

[Dr. John Watson]

Ah yes, yes.

[Baron Gruner]

Did you ever see finer workmanship or a better glaze, huh? But have you the Ming saucer with you?

[Dr. John Watson]

Here it is, Baron Gruner. What do you think of that?

[Baron Gruner]

Very fine, very fine indeed. And you say you have a set of six to correspond? That is, sir, what puzzles me is that I should not have heard of such magnificent specimens. I only know of one in England to match this and it's certainly not likely to be on the market. Would it be indiscreet, Doctor, to ask how you obtain this?

[Dr. John Watson]

Does it really matter? You can see it's genuine for yourself. As to the value, I am content to take an expert's valuation that the.

[Baron Gruner]

Piece is genuinely certain. And yet in dealing with objects of such value one naturally wishes to know all about the transaction. But suppose I am bound to take every possibility into account. Suppose it should prove afterwards that you have no right to sell?

[Dr. John Watson]

I would guarantee you against any claims of the sort.

[Sherlock Holmes]

That of course would open up the.

[Baron Gruner]

Question as to what your guarantee was.

[Dr. John Watson]

Worth? My bankers would answer that.

[Baron Gruner]

Quite so. And yet the whole transaction strikes me as rather unusual.

[Dr. John Watson]

Well, Baron, I should hate to waste your valuable time. I've given you first offer as I understood you were a connoisseur. But I shall have no difficulty in other quarters.

[Baron Gruner]

No. Pray be seated again, sir.

[Dr. John Watson]

Very well.

[Baron Gruner]

May I ask, Doctor, who told you I was a connoisseur?

[Dr. John Watson]

You have written a book on the subject.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Have you read them?

[Dr. John Watson]

No.

[Baron Gruner]

Dear me, this becomes more and more difficult to understand. You too are a connoisseur and collector with a piece as valuable as this in your hands, and yet you have never troubled to consult the one book which would have told you its value.

[Dr. John Watson]

I'm a very busy man. I'm a doctor in practice.

[Baron Gruner]

If a man has a hobby, he follows it up, whatever his other pursuits may be. Well, as a connoisseur, you'd have no objection if I asked a few questions.

[Dr. John Watson]

To test you, huh? I would ask you what you know.

[Baron Gruner]

Of the Emperor Shomu and how do you associate him with the Sho in Yanara?

[Dr. John Watson]

Tell me a little about the North.

[Baron Gruner]

Way dynasty and its place in the history of ceramics.

[Dr. John Watson]

Really, sir, this is intolerable. I came here to do you a favor and not be examined like a school boy. My knowledge may be inferior to yours, but I shall certainly not answer questions put in so offensive a way.

[Baron Gruner]

No, Dr. Barton, if you are a doctor at all, you are here on another game. You're an emissary of Sherlock Holmes, aren't you? The fellow's dying, so he sends his hirelings to keep watch on me, isn't that it? Well, you've made your way in here and by heaven, you may find it harder to get out again.

[Sherlock Holmes]

All right, Watson, leave it to me. What's this?

[Dr. John Watson]

The captain, Holmes, he's getting a gun.

[Kitty Winter]

Out of my way, everyone. It's my turn.

[Dr. John Watson]

Now, Ms. Winter, keep back. Oh no.

[Kitty Winter]

This won't take up second here. Baron Adelbert Grinner. That face won't charm any more like me again.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Bitch.

[Dr. John Watson]

All over his face. Quick, Holmes, for the love of heaven, find me some kind of oil. We may save his eyes if we're quick enough. But hurry, hurry. Horrible homes, horrible.

[Sherlock Holmes]

The wages of sin, Watson, the wages of sin. And believe me, there was plenty of sin to answer for.

[Dr. John Watson]

Yes, but not like that.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I assure you, Watson, I had no idea she had vitriol with her. She came with me to find that book she told us about. Our time was limited by your knowledge of Chinese ceramics. It was our only chance he takes precautions against burglary at night. And he had never have left the book behind when he went off to the States. It was our last chance, you understand, Sir James.

[Dr. John Watson]

Of course, of course. The man was a murderer whatsoever and could have been again. Yes, well I suppose so. Anyway, he's disfigured for Life now and Ms. De Merville is out of danger. So it seems.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Not yet I'm afraid. Women of her type don't react like that. She'd probably love him all the more as a disfigured martyrs. No, Sir James. Take this filthy book to your client and tell him not to spare her feelings with it. It's his moral side that must be destroyed, not the physical. The book will bring her down to earth like nothing else could. It's in his own handwriting. She can't get past that very well.

[Dr. John Watson]

It's been a terrible business, but you've done wonders, both of you. Good day.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Good day. Police will have a good deal to say to Miss Kitty Winter I fear Watson, though in her case there are certainly extenuating circumstances.

[Dr. John Watson]

I expect you're right. But to think that any woman. Ah me.

[Sherlock Holmes]

I fear you have something to learn yet. If I were to tell you.

[Dr. John Watson]

Holmes, quickly, come to the window.

[Sherlock Holmes]

Why, what is it?

[Dr. John Watson]

Sir James Damery, that brougham he just got into, see it there? Moving off now. The coat of arms on the side. Aha. Now I know who our illustrious client was. He's.

[Sherlock Holmes]

He's a chivalrous gentleman and a loyal friend to a lady in great danger. Let that be enough for us, my dear Watson, now and forever.

[Dr. John Watson]

In the illustrious kind. You heard Robert Langford and Kenneth Baker as Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson. Others in the cast were Fiona Fraser, Gabriel Bayman, John Hayter, Bruce Anderson and Louis Ice.