C (11:04)

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B (12:01)

Imagine if you could ask someone anything you wanted about their finances. How much do you make? Who paid for that fancy dinner? What did your house actually cost? On every episode of what We Spend, a different guest opens up their wallets, opens up their lives really, and tells us all about their finances. For one week, they tell us everything they spend their money on. My son slammed like $6 with the.

A (12:26)

Blueberries in five minutes.

B (12:28)

This is a podcast about all the ways money comes into our lives and then leaves again, which of course we all have a lot of feelings about.

A (12:36)

I really want these things. I want to own a house, I want to have a child. But this morning I really wanted a coffee.

B (12:42)

Because whatever you are buying or not buying or saving or spending, at the end of the day, money is always about more than your balance. I'm Courtney Harrell and this is what we spend, listen to and follow what We Spend. An Odyssey original podcast available now wherever you get your podcasts.

A (13:01)

So this is a thing that, like I said, I feel like the Lord has been walking me through and might even still be kind of teaching me how to do is to feel worthy of his good things. Like to feel worthy of good things in general. To feel worthy not only of his love, but other things that come along. Even maybe when it comes to the way that I am treated by others and loved by others, especially in the church, I think that not being able to fully accept the love of God will also never allow you to fully accept the love of God that is shown through other people as well. Because there's a direct love that we can get straight from God. But then there's love that God loves to shine through other people and he loves to use other things and. And vessels and yeah, people to also show you his love. Yeah, if you're not fully embracing and accepting the love of God, it might also be hard for you to that kind of love that is being shown to you through other people. And so obviously there are a whole lot of roots of where maybe this could come from in your story versus my story versus theirs. Like there are things that have probably happened to us, fears that have been ignited in us, hesitations that have happened because of things that have happened in our lives. That could be whether you actually have been hurt in the church before, or it could be a story kind of like my own, where you had a life before Jesus and you were in the world and the world really beat you down. That is my story. I can't speak about any other scenario other than obviously my own, but my story was the world beat me to a pulp. Like, I really had no confidence. I didn't feel worthy of. It's funny, because I feel like I started off really believing that I deserved these things, but then the more and more that I wasn't being treated the way that I thought I deserved to be treated, I started to believe those lies instead. And it's so crazy, because once you really know the truth of God and you know about the war that happens in the spiritual realm, that it isn't a war against flesh and blood. And you see the truth for what it is, and you see through the individual that was fully being used for evil. You know, like, I think back to relationships, and it's like I still have so much love for that person. And I think the only reason I can do that is because God has showed me the truth, that it was actually something else operating. Of course, these people had to say yes, and they shook hands and there were open doors and they agreed with these spirits. But it's like they were being used in a way, and it's not okay. But I think that is the only thing that, like, actually allows me to still have love for these people and to see it for what it was, that it was really the enemy. And it was the devil that was prowling around like a lion to come and kill, steal and destroy me and my life since I was a young little girl. The thing is about the enemy is he does not care about how young you are. And so it's like you think about these things that go way, way, way, way, way back to maybe even like, you being 3 years old. Like, the enemy has no mercy. He doesn't care. If anything, he's probably like, I'm going to get them young while they're vulnerable and naive and they don't know much. Like that actually is probably the best scenario for the enemy, is to get us as young as he can. And so there were things that were being embedded in me. I didn't realize, but there were lies and there were things that were being embedded in me from such a young age where and when it kept happening over and over. It's such a tactic of the enemy. Like, I see it now that this was, like, his plan. But if the same thing kind of kept happening and coming back, like this familiar spirit or just the same tactic that was coming against me again and again my whole life, and I didn't know the truth. Like, I didn't have the armor of God. I didn't know the word the way that I do now. I was so defenseless, Like, I had no weapons to defend myself against these tactics of the enemy. And so when something like this happens to you over and over and over again and it's through different people, you start to believe that that is actually the truth about yourself. Because you're like, well, what's the common denominator here? Because I'm going through. And maybe it could be about dating, but, like, I'm being treated this way, and then, you know, I date a completely different individual, and the same thing happens. And it's funny because I'll look at the people that I dated, and I'm like, they were so. But then somehow I still ended up being treated the same way, and I still ended up being disappointed and neglected the same way. And this isn't me, like, trashing on anyone. This is just me, honestly trashing on the enemy. Like, this is who I'm trying to expose right now. I'm not trying to expose anyone from my past, but it's like, this was the very tactic that the enemy used on me to just absolutely crush my spirit, to crush my confidence, to crush anything that felt that I was worthy of anything good. And the thing about the enemy is he doesn't want you to believe that, because that is the truth, is that you are worthy of the good gifts that God has for you in your life. Yeah. You start to look at yourself and say, why does this keep happening to me? It's the same thing, like, over and over again. And so you look at the common denominator, you know, to the naked eye and from the outside, without knowing anything of what's going on actually on the inside. And you're like, it's. Maybe this is just what I deserve. Maybe this is what I have to put up with. I feel exhausted, though. So it's like you slowly are getting convinced that, like, this is the very thing that you deserve. But then at the same time, you're like, but I'm ex. But there's something in me that's like, I'm exhausted of this, though. And there is a part of me that's like, but I don't want to be treated this way. I don't want to feel this way. I don't want to have to put up with these things. Like, I don't think there was a single relationship that I was in where it was healthy. And, I mean, I guess that makes sense because none of it was centered in God. But, like, it wasn't even, like, good. It wasn't even, like, okay, I was always. And it wasn't verbally. It was through people's actions. But I was always told that I wasn't worth it. I wasn't worth it, and I wasn't good enough, and I wasn't worth the hassle or the time or the effort. I wasn't worth the loyalty. And when that happens to you so many times, you really believe it. Like, you're like, maybe I'm not. And. And sometimes it doesn't make sense. But, like, when that lie is being screamed at to you, not only maybe verbally, like, you guys could relate to this. Maybe there are people who physically told you that to your face. Like, yeah, I've had people tell me that there's no one else in the world that would put up with me the way that they do. And so when that kind of death is spoken over you, where it's like, no one else, like, you're lucky to even have me. And again, I'm not like, this is demonic. This is all the enemy. Like, these are words that basically are coming straight out of hell. Speaking death over my identity, saying, no one else will love you. You're too much. You start to believe it. I mean, I didn't know God. I didn't know he loved me so unconditionally. And I didn't have armor. I had nothing to defend myself. I believed it all. Okay, so now coming out of BC Alley, now I'm in NC Alley, New Creation Alley. Some of those old things, God has had to kind of, like, rip off and break off of me and my identity. One of the very things that he has already been walking me through. And I think I've gotten a lot better at. So thank you. God is believing my worth. Like, believing that I am worthy. Yeah. I really think y' all, like, if you're struggling with that, if you're struggling with believing that you're worthy, like, I don't know if I'm just speaking to my girls right now. Like, I don't know what it could be about. It doesn't have to just be dating. I guess that's kind of the focus right now is that the thing that said that you were worth it was the cross. Like, the very thing that happened in history before you were ever born was the cross. That is the very thing that says that you are worthy of that kind of love, because Jesus says so, and that's how much he loves you. Accepting God's love unconditionally is step one of what we need to do. Because if you're having a hard time believing that you're worthy of anything good, it's probably because you haven't actually, like, truly accepted God's love unconditionally. I think another thing that we need to, like, recognize is that God's love is not earned. So, like, we were kind of saying in the beginning of this pod, like, we did not earn the death of Jesus. We did not earn his resurrection. We did not earn the sacrifice and the love. Like, he just chooses. God chooses to love us that much. And God chose, like, chose to give his one and only Son to us as a sacrifice for our sins. And it was given freely as a gift. God's love is still freely given as a gift. I think another productive thing to do if this is something that's hard for you, is embracing the concept that God sees your potential and loves you for who you are, not just for what you do. And that might be something that you have to unlearn from people as well. That might be something that you've been conditioned to believe because that's all people have ever wanted from you, is that they've only loved you for what you can do for them rather than God is like the literal opposite of that. You guys, we need to embrace the concept that God actually sees your potential and loves you for who you are right now. He loves you in the mess. He loves you even when you sin. He loves you when you doubt, when you have the lack of faith, when you don't believe in him or yourself. Like, he still loves you. His love is unconditional. When we look up, the definition of unconditional is, is not subject to any conditions. Any conditions. It's infinite. Like that definition, unconditional means forever and ever and ever and ever. There is no ceiling. There is no limit. Like, there is no amount of mess up. Like, he loves us unconditionally. I think another thing that is really productive if this is something that is hard for you, is also reflecting on Scripture and teachings that emphasize God's unconditional love for humanity. So I think another really beautiful thing that we can do is read Scripture and Read the Bible. I mean, the Bible itself is a physical representation of how much God loves us. He says it in it, but not only does he say it in it, like over and over and over again. I mean, I've even heard people say that, you know, the Bible is like a giant love letter from God to his people. He gave us this key to life. It's the very thing that gets us through life, reminds us of who he is. That alone is an act of unconditional love. We did nothing to earn that. We did nothing to earn the guidance of God. Even through having the privilege to have the word of God.

B (23:39)

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A (24:36)

This could be another big one for a lot of us is forgiving ourselves. I don't know if anyone relates to this, but sometimes, sometimes it's hard for me to believe that I'm worthy of something because, well, one, yeah, I don't think I've done anything to earn it. But then that goes to the very first thing we said, which is to recognize that God's love is not earned. So we gotta unlearn that mentality because it's not earned. He gives it freely as a gift. But sometimes I'll be like, I didn't earn it. I didn't even earn this. Like, I didn't work for this. God's like, right, Exactly. I just love you and I want you to have this thing I want to provide. And then also I get really hard on myself. Like I'm. I'm not as. As quick to forgive myself for the things and the mistakes that I have made, especially in my past. We've talked about this a couple times on the podcast, but, like, how to have forgiveness and grace for yourself and to not have guilt and shame about the mistakes that you've made, whether it was yesterday or it was, like, four years ago, you know, but being able to forgive yourself for past mistakes and shortcomings and understanding that everyone makes mistakes, and having that same grace and forgiveness that God has for yourself. Because if God can have that for you, our perfect, perfect God, if he can have that for you, you can also have that for yourself. And I think that that is something God can walk us through and teach us how to do as well. Is like, this is a hard thing for me, God. Like, I don't know how to forgive myself for these things. And so I'm gonna really need, like, your guidance right now of how to do that. And I might even need your strength. This actually could be a really cool prayer that you can make, is just. Just asking the Lord to give you the eyes that he has for you and the heart that he has for you. I love to pray a prayer like that for other people where I'm like, God, help me to see, you know, your people. Help me to see others the way that you see them. Help me to have a literal. I want to have your heart, God. Like, I want to feel your burdens. I want to feel your love for people. I just want to have a heart like yours for other people. And that's a great prayer. And we should all have that heart posture. Literally, earnestly ask God to have that kind of perspective. But I think that we should also pray that same prayer about ourselves. Like, God, give me the eyes that you have for me. I want to see myself the way that you see me. And I know that you see me with mercy. I know that when you look at me, you have love in your eyes and you have grace and you have compassion. And you do see my potential. You know, it's like what we talked about the other day with David and the shepherd boy and Goliath. Like, God saw David's potential. He didn't see exactly where he was at and say, no, God saw his potential. He saw his faith. That is very much something God has for you as well, is he sees your potential, and he knows sometimes you might mess up. But I think such a productive prayer you could have is, God, help me to see myself with that same love and POV of potential and all these things. Like, I want to see myself that way and also help me to have a heart of love that you have. For me, for myself. Because if you are capable of giving people grace when they make mistakes and, you know, shortcomings, just people. And if you have enough grace for other people to be like, hey, man, it's okay. Like, everyone makes mistakes. It's all good. If you can have that heart posture for other people, I want you to feel confident that you are totally capable of having that, that same kind of heart posture for yourself. And it's not like everyone else deserves it more than you. Like, you are also included in that. Another thing that could help with your sense of worthiness is serving others and doing good works in faith that can actually enhance your sense of worthiness. Focus on helping those in need and making a positive impact on the world around you. I think that that also is a great opportunity to, like, be like, all right, God, I want you to use me. Use me as a vessel, Lord, to serve others and to make a positive impact on the world, but use me. There's nothing more beautiful than knowing that you're being used by God and knowing that he actually does want to dwell inside of you and he wants to use you to make a positive impact on the world. Yeah, to, like, be used in such a way to either give people hope or to help people or to love others or to lead them to Jesus. Like, I do believe that when you're being used in a way like that by God and you see the fruit of it as well, like, you see the impact that you're having on other people, that also can encourage you of your sense of worthiness, of being like, okay, wait, no, I must be worth something because God is using me. And there are testimonies that are coming out of the way that I'm serving others. And there is value in me being here on Earth. I mean, if there wasn't, God wouldn't be using me in such a way. And so, yeah, remembering that serving others reflects God's love and can deepen your connection to Him. This is something that we started the podcast with, but seeking God's grace through prayer and repentance. So praying for God's love and guidance, acknowledging your need for his grace and forgiveness, engaging in acts of repentance, turning away from harmful behaviors, and seeking to live a life that reflects God's teachings. I love this too, y' all. It says, God accepts us as we are. He doesn't wait for us to improve ourselves, nor do we have to earn his love or forgiveness. Feeling unworthy of God's love is our perception, and it's not actually Reality, God demonstrates His own love for us in this while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. So I think that whenever that temptation can come into your mind of not feeling worthy of this, that or the next, or it feels like it's too good to be true, or you're like, there's no way. I think believing and remembering the very thing that God demonstrated with his own love for us. With Christ dying for us on the cross, you was just thinking of the cross, honestly, is the one thing that will ground you and be like, oh, wow, yeah, no, yeah. I mean, if I'm going to sit here and say that I'm not worthy, then what was all of that for? Like, then why did God die for me? It's just a lie of the enemy, and it's not true. Another kind of good POV that you could have is that if this is something like, if this is a mindset that you could have for the people that you love, like, if people in your family or it could be your spouse or your kids, where it's like, they would really love this thing and you have a heart posture of like, yeah, but I want to give them a little more. Like, I really want to give them more. You know, that is just a sliver of what the Lord actually has for you. Like, that is the. A sliver of the love that God has for you, and he wants to give you abundantly more. But it does come down to us allowing Him. It's not that we hold any power over God. And we, you know, it's like, we won't let you, God, but it's like, if we're not willing to receive, you know, if we're not willing to receive the good gifts that God has for us, he's never going to force his hand on us, you know, especially when it comes to his love. I believe that's a lot of the reason why he even let me walk so long without him is like, it's not that he didn't love me, but it's like, I'm not going to force my love onto you. You know, I'm not going to force myself onto you. And so it's just another form of his love is like, he gives us the choice on whether we want to actually receive his good gifts or not, or to receive his love. So it's always been unconditional for you. It's always been available to you. It's always been infinite for you. But it's a matter of accepting it and embracing it and allowing him to, you know, like, you can only give to a person who's willing to receive. You know, if you think about it again, like, if there's a family member or someone in your life where it's like, you want to give to them, but if they are. If they are refusing and they're resistant and they're like, no, I don't. I don't. Like, I don't deserve that I'm worthy. I don't deserve that I've earned it. Like, I don't want it. But if we think about scenarios in our life, like, maybe that's already kind of happened, where you're like. And then what's your response? Typically your response is like, no. Like, you didn't technically earn this. And, no, I guess, you know, there was nothing that was. Was done. But I. I just want to. You know, it's like, you just want to. Why? Because you love them. It's the same concept with God. It's like, I didn't actually do anything to earn this. Right. That's why it's a gift. I just want to give it to you because I love you that much. And so receiving it and believing that that is God's heart for you, and he will knock your socks off, most likely he will surprise you. There's nothing we could even imagine that the Lord can do for us. But as long as we have a posture of just receiving and we're open to it, I think that's when we allow ourselves to feel the most loved we could ever feel in our lives. Because God's love is just so good. Yeah. I think that's also the moment that we allow God to really work some crazy miracles in our life. It's like, whoa, okay, this is how big your love is for me. God, I could have never imagined this, you know? Well, I love you guys, and I pray that this encouraged a lot of people. I pray that it spoke just. Just identity and life over you. And it brought us back to a place of simplicity, of like, yeah, God's love is something we'll never really fully understand, and it's not anything that we earned or we did, but being okay with that and accepting that reality and being like, but I'm still gonna receive. Like, I don't get it, but I'm just gonna freely receive his love. And I choose to be a son today, and I. I choose to be a daughter today, and I'm just gonna receive from my dad, even if it doesn't make sense. Sense to me. Like, I'm gonna humble myself and be like, I don't get it. But I receive God, and I thank you for how much you love me. And I thank you that you do want to provide in my life and that you do want to love me unconditionally and you even want to show your love through other people in my life. Okay, then I receive. It doesn't make sense, but I receive. I pray that that is our heart posture now, moving forward. I love you guys. Thank you for hanging out with me for another podcast episode. I'll see you guys in the next episode. I hope that you have such a great week or the next few days until we see each other. And also, guys, can we do something cool? Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is today? Let's walk more like him. Be more like him, y' all, I'm so proud of you. You are so, so worthy. And I will see you guys next time. Bye. Are some of y' all still listening? Okay, if you're still here, that means you're a real one, which is why I'm about to share this with you. If you've already caught up on all the episodes so far and you don't want to wait until next Friday for a new one, I have really good news for you. Subs to our Patreon to get early access to the episodes every week, early access to merch launches or any other exciting news, and receive personalized encouraging messages or Bible verses from us, subscribe to Our patreon@www.patreon.com C backslash CWCOI I do also want to mention that there is a way to give to the podcast, so if you ever feel led to donate, it blesses me so much and it helps allow the podcast to keep running. You can donate to our PayPal at www. PayPal Me Backslash cwcoi We appreciate y' all and we love you so, so much.