Christ With Coffee On Ice – “i wish someone told me this in my 20's”

Host: Ally Yost
Date: January 2, 2026

Episode Overview

In this deeply personal and encouraging episode, Ally Yost reflects on her twenties and shares the lessons, regrets, and wisdom she’s gained now in her early thirties. Inspired by a TikTok conversation and her listeners’ requests, Ally delivers “big sister” advice rooted in faith, vulnerability, and hope. Throughout, she revisits scripture, discusses major obstacles, and explores how her relationship with Jesus transformed her approach to life, relationships, and self-worth.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Reflecting on the Passage of Time and Regret

• Ally opens by reflecting on turning 30 and realizing an entire decade is now behind her.

  • "My 20s have a stamp on them and they're like, and this was Ally's twenties and it's over. Which is crazy." (03:00)
  • There’s no going back, only the ability to learn and pass on advice to others.

• She sees value in sharing her “mistakes” without shame.

  • Her hope: “...at the end of this episode, it would give you clarity on how you could live your life better in your 20s than how I did.” (07:10)

2. The Weight of Relationships and Surrendering to God

• Ally candidly discusses the pressure she put on herself to find and sustain relationships in her 20s.

  • "That was the very thing that I relied on, that was my foundation... mainly romantic. Like, I wish that I didn't carry so much of a burden of relationships." (12:30)
  • She admits that this led to settling and pain, “accepting treatment that I didn’t deserve.” (13:20)

• Finding freedom in faith: She describes a turning point when she met Jesus, entrusting her relational and emotional needs to Him:

  • "I was like, okay, Jesus, if you are who you say you are, and you say that your burdens are light and your yoke is easy, I'm not gonna worry about this part of my life anymore." (16:00)
  • Letting Jesus into wounds of loneliness and unlovability: “Those were boo boos in my heart… those were things I really needed to let Jesus in on.” (17:15)

• Notable Quote:

  • “I wish that I understood in my 20s that it's just not that heavy. It doesn't have to be that heavy.” (20:20)

3. The Trap of People-Pleasing and Fear of Man

• Ally recalls being ruled by what people thought of her.

  • “What mattered to me in my twenties that don’t matter anymore? I would say what people think of me. Whoa, I cared so much.” (36:00)

• She references Galatians 1:10 on serving God vs. pleasing people:

  • “People pleasing and God serving—they don't mix, and they're not the same.” (42:00)

• She explains the dangers and roots of people-pleasing:

  • “If you just want everyone to love you, it’s a bit prideful.” (49:00)
  • This need is rooted in insecurity—a desire for security and acceptance from others.

• A Humbling Jesus Perspective:

  • “If I believe Jesus was perfect in all of his ways and not every single person who met him, loved him and adored him, who the heck do I think I am?” (52:10)
  • “You don’t have to be everyone’s cup of tea. Why do you have to be everyone's cup of tea?” (55:20)

• Notable Quote:

  • “I was already accepted and loved by God in all of my flaws, in all of my quirkiness, in all of my awkwardness.” (57:00)

4. The Importance of Physical Health & Stewardship

• Ally wishes she’d started taking care of her physical health in her twenties.

  • “I wish I would have started earlier my fitness journey and caring about my physical health. I'm just now on that journey…” (01:07:40)
  • “This body is not my own. This was a gift given to me by God.” (01:09:25)

• She now sees health as stewardship and honoring God:

  • “No wonder you feel like garbage, because all you’re doing is drinking alcohol… you’re eating Taco Bell. You're eating McDonald's. And that’s how you’re gonna repay the Lord?” (01:11:10)

• Encouragement:

  • “Go on that walk today, please, please go on the walk… it does catch up to you.” (01:12:50)

5. Root Beliefs and Insecurity

• An underlying fear: Not being enough.

  • “That I wasn’t enough. That I wasn’t good enough… it held me back in a lot of ways.” (01:15:20)
  • Led to accepting poor relationships, avoiding dreams, and believing “mid” about herself.

• Speaking truth:

  • “If there’s ever a voice in your head that's telling you that you're not enough, I'm telling you that it's a lie.” (01:19:50)

6. Relationship Decisions and Self-Worth

• Settling for less because of desperation for love.
  • “Now that my life is rooted in Jesus... my standards are fair now. My standards are like, no, this is actually what I believe I deserve…” (01:22:30)
  • On singleness: “All this love that I have to give, like I'm not just gonna give it to the first person who's willing to ‘love me’. I'm just gonna give it to [God] until the right person comes around…” (01:25:30)

7. Financial Lessons

• Wasting money to fill a void.

  • “I started to make a good amount of money… I just was really careless with it and it was just like fun and money was free to me.” (01:28:10)
  • “I spent thousands of dollars to feel good for a few hours.” (01:30:10)

• The shift:

  • “The money in my bank account actually isn’t mine… I just wish that I had learned how to honor God more, even in just the way I was spending my money.” (01:33:15)

8. Spiritual Habits – The Game Changer

• Regret over ignoring spiritual habits in her 20s.

  • “To be honest, I didn't really have any spiritual habits aside from burning sage in my home [and] manifesting.” (01:38:25)

• Main Advice:

  • “I wish that I read the Bible. I wish I read Scripture every day. My 20s would simply look different had I just done those things.” (01:39:15)
  • Encourages building Christian community early, joining church or church groups, and understanding Jesus’ character through Scripture.

• Final Encouragements:

  • “If you are reading the Bible now and you haven’t even hit your 20s yet…you’re exactly where you need to be, and you’re doing the thing that I wish I did.” (01:45:50)

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• “We're never going to do life perfectly. We're never going to do life the way that we wished we had done life had we known the things that we know now.” (06:05)
• On letting Jesus carry relational burdens:
  “Okay, Jesus, if you are who you say you are …I'm not gonna worry about this part of my life anymore.” (16:00)
• “Just relax. Just be you, girl.” (50:40)
• “This body is not my own. This was a gift given to me by God.” (01:09:25)
• “If there’s ever a voice in your head that’s telling you that you’re not enough, I’m telling you that it’s a lie.” (01:19:50)
• “The money in my bank account actually isn’t mine.” (01:33:15)
• “I wish that I read the Bible. I wish I read Scripture every day. My 20s would simply look different had I just done those things.” (01:39:15)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:00 — The reality of turning 30 and looking back on the 20s.
• 12:30 — The weight and pressure of relationships in early adulthood.
• 16:00 — Entrusting relational concerns to Jesus.
• 20:20 — Realizing life doesn’t have to be so heavy.
• 36:00 — Caring too much what people thought in her 20s.
• 42:00 — Galatians 1:10 and the incompatibility of people pleasing with serving God.
• 49:00 — The pride and insecurity underlying people pleasing.
• 52:10 — If Jesus was rejected, who am I to expect universal acceptance?
• 55:20 — Letting go of needing to be everyone’s cup of tea.
• 57:00 — Already accepted and loved by God.
• 01:07:40 — Wishing she’d started prioritizing physical health earlier.
• 01:15:20 — “I wasn’t enough” as a core limiting belief.
• 01:19:50 — Affirming listeners against the “not enough” narrative.
• 01:22:30 — Relationship decisions underpinned by lack of self-worth.
• 01:28:10 — Major financial mistakes stemming from lack of wisdom and fulfillment.
• 01:33:15 — Realizing stewardship of money is a spiritual issue.
• 01:38:25 — The absence of real spiritual habits and the value of scripture.
• 01:45:50 — Encouragement to young listeners: Begin those spiritual habits now.

Summary

Ally masterfully mixes personal stories with spiritual wisdom, offering heartfelt advice to younger women navigating their 20s. Central themes include the importance of turning to Christ for identity and security, releasing the burden of people pleasing, honoring God through health and stewardship, and cultivating spiritual disciplines early. Her raw vulnerability is both relatable and practical, making this a potent “big sister” episode for anyone who wants to thrive in their faith and life during their twenties and beyond.