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My name is Mackenzie, and I started a GoFundMe for the adoptive mother of a nonverbal autistic child. The mother had lost her job because she wasn't able to find adequate care for this autistic child. So she really needed some help with living expenses, paying some back bills. So I launched a GoFundMe to help support them during this crisis. And we raised about 10, $10,000 within just a couple of months. I think that the surprising thing was by telling a clear story and just like really being very clear about what we needed, we had some really generous donations from people who were really moved by the situation that this family was struggling with.

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GoFundMe is the world's number one fundraising platform, trusted by over 200 million people. Start your GoFundMe today at gofundme.com that's gofundme.com gofundme.com this podcast is supported by GoFundMe. Hello, everybody. Welcome to another episode of Christ with Coffee on Ice. I am your host, Ali Yost. It is a joy and honor to be here with you guys today. Thank you for having me. Thank you for letting me host you today. Happy Friday, everybody. I hope that you guys are all having a beautiful day and have had an incredible week so far. Really excited for today's episode. I just know that this is a topic that a lot of us could relate to. Think that this is a topic that I'd be shocked if this isn't something that you've felt in your life. And I don't know if we've ever actually taken a deep dive into this topic before. I feel like maybe we've skimmed over this topic or we've talked about this in a perspective and through the lens of forgiveness, which is great. And we will probably still incorporate forgiveness in this topic today. But I want to talk about betrayal. Being betrayed, being backstabbed, being heartbroken. I mean, the word is betrayal. That I was feeling for today, talking about that, talking about the realness of what that means, what it can feel like, what it looks like, and then also how we are called to react and move forward after being betrayed and after being hurt or taken advantage of, backstabbed, whatever that looks like, and how we're supposed to move forward as Christians and what is biblical and what the Lord actually tells us to do when betrayal happens. Because the truth of the matter is that this is a very real thing that happens in life. It's definitely a painful thing to go through, but it's also nothing that Jesus hadn't had to face or feel himself as he was here on earth. And so we can find comfort in Jesus knowing that he has endured, that he has covered, that he has compassion for you. He has understanding. And also what's even more encouraging about it is that he is the example when it comes to anything. Right? Is like, however Jesus handled certain things is the way that we want to, right? Jesus is the example. He's our Shepherd. He is the one leading us. And I can advocate and say that I have definitely felt this multiple times in my life where I trusted somebody and I trusted maybe the things that they said versus what actually ended up happening. I have had to face that plenty of times in my life. And there was a version of me once upon a time that didn't actually really know how to handle betrayal. And what the healthiest way was for me to move forward from being betrayed. And I guess that this topic makes me so emotional, I guess, is because there is an aspect of, I mean, actually like, the whole point, like, the first thing, the only thing that Jesus really calls us to in our reaction to betrayal is actually to die to ourselves every day. And I might be getting a little too ahead of, of it by even bringing, like, going here right now. But there is a version of me that did not know how to do that. And there is a version of me now that has learned what that means. And it's a whole nother level of pain on top of being betrayed. It's like there's that, like, layer of betrayal of believing that either a certain person existed that never existed in that person, or you just never thought that this person could be capable of the things that they are doing. There's that level of pain and then there's another, like, layer to that onion of pain of, like, being like Jesus in that betrayal when all you want to do is stand up for yourself to prove why you are not guilty, to stand up for yourself to get revenge, to pay back that person. Like, there's so much evil, honestly, in our flesh and in our natural instinct when we are hurt is that we just want to hurt the person back. And so there is a level of humility and just like death to self that is birthed out of walking like Jesus through being betrayed. Does that make sense? I've. Okay, hopefully as we get through this episode, it can make more sense. If that doesn't, I will just speak for myself and say that my initial reaction when I am deeply hurt by somebody is that I want them to know how much they have deeply hurt me. And I think my initial reaction is to, like, in not so good terms, but this is just, like, the best way to say it is, like, I just want to cuss them out. Like, I just want to tell that person how much they've hurt me, and I want them to see how damaging their actions were and, like, how that betrayal has truly, like, caused trauma and trust issues and pain in my heart. Like, that is my initial reaction is I want to just either, like, call the person up, type out a major essay. Being like, this is why you suck. This is why I'm right and what you did was wrong. And I hope you know how painful that was for me, and I hope you understand that because of your actions. Like, this is how deeply hurt I am. Like, that is where I want to go without Jesus. I want to choose retaliation. I want to choose eye for an eye. I want to choose, well, if you hurt me, I'm gonna let you know how much you hurt me. My reaction without Jesus is prideful. It's like, I want you to know how terrible of a human being you were for that and how I am innocent and I was undeserving. But what Jesus teaches us to do instead of retaliation is he challenges us to slow down and stop. Instead of choosing violence, he says, I want you to choose forgiveness. Like, instead of your first reaction being retaliation and like, handing it back to the person and cussing them out and letting them know how they did you dirty. He's like, I actually want you to forgive first. I want that to be your first reaction. One of the core teachings in the Bible is the call to forgive. Jesus talks about forgiving not just once, but 70 times, seven times, which basically means an unlimited willingness to forgive. And I think one of the best ways to get to forgiveness, and this might have to be something that you have to, like, get back to multiple times over and over again is like, and I will say I've experienced this where I have truly forgiven somebody in my heart. And then, like, I. I don't know, things creep up in my mind or I start hearing things or seeing things, or bitterness and resentment and self righteousness and pride start to kind of, like, bubble up in me again, where I kind of start to puff my chest and I'm like, forgiveness is kind of like leaving the room. And I start to get really angry and get those same feelings over again of like, this is unfair, this is unjust. I didn't deserve this. And then I have to, like, get myself back to forgiveness again and forgive the person again in my heart. So I say that to say that, like, this isn't something that is always, like, a one and done thing. I'm not saying that's impossible. I actually believe that that can be true where you can truly forgive somebody in your heart. And it's like, done. I've forgiven them, I've moved on. I've genuinely forgiven them. And I think one of the best ways that you can practice forgiveness is by praying for that person. And sometimes getting to that place of, like, actually praying for the person is really hard because all you want to do is be bitter and say, no, I'm not praying for that person. Like, they hurt me, they betrayed me, they backstabbed me, they said things about me, they cheated on me, like, whatever that looks like. And the last thing you want to do is pray for them. And I think praying for them is the thing that, like, helps you get to true forgiveness in your heart for them. But I. I've had to pray my way out of bitterness a lot of times where, like, I can tell that my heart is starting to get hardened towards that person again. And I'm starting to have, like, all these not so nice narratives go on in my mind about this person, and I'm not thinking great things about them and I'm like, slandering them in my mind, even if I'm, like, not saying it out loud because. Because one thing that is definitely not okay is slander on another person, like, verbally, where you're, like, gossiping about them or saying all these things about them. I think one of the most powerful things that you can do when you are betrayed by somebody is to keep your mouth shut. Which, again, is like, the last thing I want to do initially. Like, my initial response without Jesus is, I don't want to shut up. I don't want to be quiet. I want everyone to know and that person who hurt me, that they hurt me so badly. But I think one of the best things that you can do and something that Jesus does call us to is to keep our mouths shut. And I think in the practice of us keeping our mouths shut is also us telling Jesus that we trust him when he says that he is our advocate. He is the one that judges all that. He is the one that takes care of things that are just and unjust. Like, he is the judge with a capital J. And so when we are choosing to shut our mouths and not slander the person, not gossip about them, and honestly, even if it was the truth, like, gossip doesn't Even always have to be lies. Like gossip can also be like, yeah, this is what they did to me and it was awful. Can you believe it? Whether it's factual or not, it can still be considered slander. And also, I think the thing about gossip is like the heart posture is typically wanting validation. You. You want comfort, you want somebody to feel for you. Like, you want the person to go, oh my gosh, like, you're right, that's so not okay. That's so unfair. You never deserved that. Like, whatever you're see if you're really being honest with yourself, what are you looking for and seeking in that moment when you are talking about this person in the way that you are? And again, it could be totally truthful. But I just think that that is a really quick way to determine whether this is the right thing to do or not. Because if you are doing those things in hopes to seek comfort, in hopes to seek validation, in hopes to feel like justice is being made in the room because everyone else agrees with you and nobody is on the side of the person that really hurt you, that is a crutch. And you are seeking things that you will only really be able to be fulfilled in through. Through Jesus, by trying to get it through other things like gossiping and like getting validation from other people and being like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry for you. Like, that was awful. Even if it was an awful thing that happened to you. 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And real OCD is nothing like the stereotypes of just wanting everything to be organized. It is a serious and highly misunderstood condition where unwanted and distressing thoughts get stuck on your mind in repeat, and you feel compelled to engage in certain behaviors to try to make them stop. These unwanted thoughts are called intrusive thoughts. They're often disturbing and, like, feel totally out of character. And when OCD goes after your beliefs, it can leave you feeling guilty, scared, and even disconnected from God. But of course, there is hope. OCD is highly treatable with the right kind of specialized therapy, ERP therapy, or exposure and response prevention. NOCD is the world's leading provider for OCD treatment, and all of their licensed therapists truly understand OCD and specialize in ERP therapy. Therapy with no CD is 100% virtual and covered by insurance for over 155 million Americans and even includes support between sessions so you're never facing OCD alone. To learn more about starting OCD therapy with no CD, go to nocd.com and book a free call to learn more about how they can help you. That's nocd.com I will make a disclaimer right now and say this range of betrayal and hurt is a scale, right? And so there is a difference. I just. I don't know. I'm just gonna disclaim this. There is a huge difference between somebody just being a bad person in your life. They weren't loyal, they were unfaithful, they betrayed you, they backstabbed you. And also somebody who is, like, actually genuinely dangerous, and you need to speak up and tell people about that. I hope you guys aren't getting that mixed up. It's not like you're supposed to stay quiet and, like, not speak up if somebody is actually, like, a threat to society and a threat to people. And so I think heart Posture is really important in this. And I think having that kind of self awareness will be important when it does come down to you sharing the very thing that has happened to you. I'm not saying that we can't seek discernment or guidance or wisdom from other people in the body, in the church. It could be an elder, it could be a spiritual mom or dad. It could be somebody in your life that you do truly trust and you know this person actually wants the best for you and that they're always encouraging you to the feet of Jesus and they're always encouraging you to be like Christ. I think that again, heart posture in that and that kind of self awareness will be so important because if you really are just looking for comfort or validation, it's giving gossip. Like, if you don't actually have any plans in your heart to be like, okay, I need wisdom right now and I need knowledge. I need somebody else's perspective because I am feeling so torn and like, I'm looking at the Scriptures and I'm trying to seek God's voice, but I am feeling so stuck on what I'm supposed to be doing moving forward. I need counsel. Like, I need wisdom on how to move forward and how I can be more like Jesus in this situation. What is the right thing to do? I think that's completely okay and totally biblical. Or if this person is like genuinely a threat to society, they're like a really not, not good person, then yes, of course you're supposed to speak up about that. But I guess what I'm trying to emphasize on right now is heart posture. Like, are you just trying to get puffed up by other people and to feel validated and comforted? Or are you genuinely on a mission to be like, okay, how can I become more like Jesus in this? Because it really hurts and I really don't know what to do because I want to do this, but I don't know if that's actually what Jesus wants me to do. And I think another truth of the matter in all of this is that, like, obviously we could look at Jesus and be like, God, how could you ever let something like this happen to me? Like, how could you ever let this kind of betrayal happen to my life? Why would you even allow this person to be in my life? How could you have let it get this far? I can't believe how blind I was, right? If there were red flags at all. And now you're kind of seeing it. You're like, how was I so blind? Why didn't you Let me see it. I really believe that going through something like betrayal, going through something like being backstabbed and hurt by somebody is a beautiful opportunity to literally become more like Jesus. There is nothing more testing than being betrayed by somebody that you trust. Like, that has to be probably in the top five things in life that you will have to become more like Jesus in and die to yourself every day. Because for some reason, all our flesh wants to do is fight back and show the evidence, show the receipts, retaliate. Being like Jesus in a state of betrayal is probably one of the most challenging things that we could go through. So instead of retaliation, we choose forgiveness by prayer and praying for that person and saying, jesus, everything in my body right now does not want to bless this person and be honest with God. There are plenty of times where I've gone to the Lord and I've been like, I'm not even going to pretend because you already know what's in my heart anyway. So who am I fooling? Not you. I'm not fooling myself either. I know it's. Deep down, I know that deep down I don't want the best to happen for this person. I know that deep down I'm angry, I'm pissed. I don't want anything good to happen to them. I don't want them to ever be. Be happy again. Seriously, like, be, like, so ugly honest. Like, if those are actual things that are going through your heart, in your mind, you might as well just get it out there and be honest with God, because he already knows it's in there. You're not hiding anything from him. And honestly, there's actually something so, like, relieving in that. Like, there have been times where I've gone to God and I've been like, God, I don't want to pray for this person. Like, I feel so hurt by them and in my pride right now. I know it's not right. I know it's not okay. And I don't want to be this person. That's why I'm coming to your feet right now. And I'm being honest, and I'm going to say it out loud so that you can walk, wash me clean of this, and you can get this filth out of me, because it's evil like that. Wishing ill on somebody who's hurt you is evil. That is not Jesus. It's not the love of Jesus that is in our sinful nature. Okay, so we're gonna admit to the sinful nature. We're gonna admit to the ugly icky things that are going through our minds and our hearts about this person. And we're gonna say, God, this is gross. But, like, it's true. I don't want the best for them right now. Like, I'm mad. This is unjust. This is unfair. I've done nothing but bless them. It's the Psalms reading when David was like, these people literally want me dead. And all I did was pray for them. All I did was bless them as if they were my own brothers and sisters. Like, I don't. I want. I don't want the best for them. Like, I did nothing wrong. This is so unjust. This is so unfair. But something that is so healing is admitting that to the Lord and then honestly repenting and being like, God, I'm so sorry that that's where my heart is at, and I'm so sorry that those are real thoughts that are. Have gone through my mind. I need you to renew my mind right now. I need your blood, I believe, plead the blood of Jesus over my mind and over my heart right now. I pray against all bitterness, all resentment, all revenge, all evil that is in my heart right now. I pray against it, and I plead the blood of Jesus over it. God, please cleanse my heart. Renew my heart, God. Get every nasty, gunky, nasty thing out of my heart right now, Lord, and make me clean. Renew me. I don't want to be this person. So that's step one to forgiveness is like actually admitting what you're feeling and what's going through your mind about this person, and then repenting and surrendering it and pleading the blood of Jesus over yourself and saying, I will not be that icky, gross version of myself. I want to be a Christlike, graceful, forgiving, blessing version of myself, which can only be done through the power of the blood, power of the Holy Spirit, the power of Jesus. That's the only way that it can be done. And then the next step is genuinely praying for that person and asking God for compassion for them and say, okay, God, I was deeply hurt by this person. But it is that cliche of, like, hurt people hurt people. Like, it is only someone's pain, where they are capable of inflicting pain on another person and whether you even know what it could be deeply rooted in or not. You're like, hey, I don't know where that could come from, but it's got to come from something like, this person is deeply hurting in one way or another. Maybe you do know. Maybe you've had a crazy revelation and you're like what? I know exactly why they could treat me this way. It's because of xyz. And then you can have compassion for that person and say, you know what? I'm going to choose to actually have a heart for this person and believe that the only reason they were capable of hurting me is because of their own hurt. The only reason that they were able to sin against me is because of the ways that they've been sin against. And so, Lord, I lift that part of their heart up to you, and I ask God that you restore them. Like, please restore those parts of their heart. Give them peace. Flood them with your love and your healing. You need to lift that person up in prayer because the only reason they were capable of doing that to you is because they are hurting themselves. And the minute that you can see that, and like, honestly, I've asked the Lord to give me a lens of his eyes for that person and be like, look, I've been looking at them through the lens of my own eyes. I've been looking at them through the lens of my own hurt, and it's gotten me nowhere other than being bitter and feeling resentful and angry at the person. And so, God, if it's challenging for me to get to a place of compassion, then I'm gonna need your lens. I'm gonna need to see this person through your eyes. Otherwise, I don't think I'm going to be able to get to that place of genuinely blessing them and forg. Praying for them. And so, God, my prayer right now is, please help me see this person the way you see them. Because even in all of that person's sin, okay, even in all that person's pain and hurt and the ways that they've hurt other people, God still is obsessed with them and adores them. Which, like, I know, is probably a really hard thing for a lot of us to swallow. But the truth is, is that all of us are the same that way. Like, whether you could imagine yourself doing that or not. Maybe you aren't capable of doing the very thing that that person did to you, but you sure as heck are capable of doing something else that is painful, sinful, and dishonest in God's eyes, then it's something else. But we're all the same, okay? We're all broken, we're all imperfect. We all cause pain on one another in one way or another. And so, yeah, maybe you would have never done that to the person, but who knows what you would have done? You could have done that or this or that over there, none of us are exempt of this. None of us are better than the other person. And yet God still adores you. He still adores that person. Jesus still died on the cross for them in the same way that he still died on the cross for you. And so that's a reality that we have to humble ourselves to when we are humbled at the feet of Jesus and go, yeah, I was actually no more deserving of your sacrifice, Jesus, than they were. Like, I am no more important than the other person. And if that is something that you really believe in your heart, where you're like, no, I know I'm more important than that person, that's scary. That's a scary place to be in. And honestly, it's probably crossed a lot of our minds. We're in, you know, our pride, where we're like, well, I would never do something like that. I could never think of doing anything like that. You'd be surprised because one of the Jesus's most faithful disciples, one that walked with him in person, in real life, physically saw him do healings and bring people back to life and bring sight back to the blind. Peter, he was the rock. He was like the guy in the group of disciples. Jesus was like, yeah, you're gonna be the rock here, Peter. I trust you that much. But Jesus still did that, while also knowing that in the future, Peter was gonna betray Jesus and swear three times, denied Jesus three times, saying, I never knew the guy. He needed these people to be so convinced that he didn't know Jesus, so much so that he cussed. He cussed at the people and was like, I don't know him. I don't know him. Okay? All while just a few moments prior of that, Jesus warned Peter and was like, listen, I know that you're saying you love me and you would die for me and you'd do anything for me, but I want you to know, before the rooster crows, you will deny me three times. Peter couldn't even imagine it. Peter was like, what do you. I am in love with you, Jesus. I love you. You're my best friend. You're everything. You saved my life. You are literally the son of God. I would never deny you. And that's exactly what Peter did. So. And that's somebody who literally, face to face, walked with Jesus. And Peter was still capable of doing the unthinkable, like, something he didn't think he could ever do. And so, again, we can't sit here in our pride saying, I'd never do that. Okay? Peter already paved that path for us. Honestly, who are we to say that we would never do that to somebody? I think it's just because that. Because we're the victim in that moment and we're the ones in our pride that we are capable of being like I could never. Because that's so easy to say when you're on the receiving end of being betrayed and hurt by somebody. But I don't know if I trust myself enough to say that I wouldn't hurt somebody the same way. Maybe not in that exact way, but I could. I could totally hurt somebody just as badly, just maybe in a different way. So I am no better than this person. One thing that I have learned in my walk with Jesus is that staying connected to God throughout the entirety of my day is a necessity. Obviously, making a habit to spend time with Jesus in the beginning of your days is great, but obviously life continues to happen in the rest of our day. And so staying rooted in the Lord throughout our days is really important. And one way that I do that is through the Glorify app. Glorify is the number one Christian daily devotional app, and it's honestly been a steady part of my faith routine for a while now. There's fresh devotionals, new courses, content that meets me right where I'm at and honestly points me back to God every time. When it's tempting to look everywhere else, Glorify helps me stay centered and keep God at the heart of my day. And it's built for real life. That could be like five minutes in the car, 10 minutes on a walk. So whether you've been walking with Jesus for years or you've just started to explore your faith, Glorify makes it easier to draw closer to God anytime, anywhere. If this feels right, you should download the Glorify app on your phone and help create space for God in your everyday. Listeners to the show can get full access to glorify for just 29.99 for the year. That's glorify's lowest price ever. Download the glorify app now at glorify-app.com alli Again, get full access all year for 29.99 at glorify-app.com Alli that's glorified-app.com alli Humility and compassion, which are only things that we can get through Jesus, like true humility and true compassion, are things that we can only get from God. And that is the secret remedy of getting to a place of true forgiveness and being able to pray for that person and pray that in the ways that they are hurting and because of the ways they could hurt you, God, I pray that those very things are the things that you heal them in. Help them, Lord. They need you. And the minute that you access that is the minute that you actually receive full peace again. Because the truth is, is that when you are betrayed by somebody and hurt by somebody, it is a real weight to carry of bitterness, resentment, anger, revengeous thoughts. Like those are heavy weights and burdens to carry, which also God doesn't want you to carry. And it says in his word that his yoke is easy and his burden is light. And you know what? Yoke isn't easy and what burden isn't light is the burden and the yoke of bitterness and unforgiveness. It's not light. It will literally age you. It'll probably give you wrinkles. It'll probably give you bags under your eyes. You know, it'll probably make you a pretty miserable person. You don't walk through life light anymore when you're carrying the weight of bitterness and anger. And so, yes, there is a aspect of genuinely blessing the other person and hoping that this is a place that God can heal them in, but also like freeing yourself of that bondage, you know, not letting the bondage of other people put you in bondage. Because the truth is, is like the bondage of other people was the very thing like, in that person, in their pain and their hurt and whatever it is that's inside of them that Jesus, they haven't let God into to heal them in that bondage has now hurt you. But don't let that bondage then put you in bondage where now you're carrying resentment and bitterness and anger. Like, don't let the enemy, like, kill two birds with one stone in that moment, you know, where it's like, he's already got them in bondage. Don't let him get you too reverse uno that situation and challenge evil with love and say, you know what? I'm not gonna come into agreement with bitterness and resentment because I know that that's only going to put me in bondage. I know that that's only going to be a million pounds on my shoulders. It's going to make me a miserable person to be around. It's going to put dark circles under my eyes. No one's gonna like being around me anymore because I'm just pessimistic and bitter and all that comes out of my mouth all the time is, I can't believe that happened to me. I can't believe that person did that to me. I honestly can't wait till the day until da, da, da, da. Because it also says in Scripture that whatever is stored in our hearts is what comes out of our mouths. And so if you have bitterness and resentment stored in your heart, weighing your shoulders down, that's also the only thing that's coming out of your mouth. You're a miserable person to be around now. No one is having fun around you. You're miserable on the outside, you're miserable on the inside. And so you're gonna say, nope. I see what you're trying to do here, Satan. I see what you're trying to do here, devil. And I'm not gonna do that, actually. I'm gonna repay evil with blessings. And I'm going to surrender this pain, believing that when Jesus says in his wor, the judge, he is the one that is just. He is our defender. He is the one that is going to bring everything to the light. That's another script. I don't know the scriptures off the top of my head, but I'm telling y', all, it's in the Bible. When it says that everything is brought to the light, I won't just tell you. I'll bring up the receipts. Okay, this is Luke 8. 17. For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made known to all. So pay attention to how you hear. To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given. But for those who are not listening, even what they think they understand will be taken away from them. Okay, anyway, Luke 8. 17 says, Everything that is concealed will be brought to light and make known to all. You have to believe that God is telling the truth in his scripture when he says everything. Everything. Not just some things, not situationally, not just like, oh, well, it depends. Like everything that is concealed, meaning everything that was done to you in the dark, whether people know about it or not, it will be brought to the light. And so you are repaying evil with blessings by forgiving this person, praying for them, surrendering the situation, and receiving the unconditional love and healing of Jesus to then repair the boo boos that have been left on your heart from that betrayal and hurt. Jesus can do all of that. And then what you're going to do to then exercise that muscle of faith we were just talking about a few weeks ago is trusting that when he says what he says, he means what he says, that God is not a Liar. He can't lie. He physically can't lie. Why? Why can't God lie? Because he's perfect and he's sinless. He's perfect. He's the only thing that's actually perfect. It's God. He can't lie. Lying is a sin. You know who is the master and author of lies? The devil. There's always an opposite. So the opposite of the author of liars, who is the devil is God, who is the author of truths. He can only tell the truth. So his word is honest. And his word says that everything that is done in the dark, everything that is concealed, will be revealed in the light. And who's going to do that? Who's responsible for that? God. So another thing to remember in this is like, we're going to humble ourselves also by staying in our place and letting God be in his position of God and not try to control the narrative of like. But I'm in charge of revealing it to the light. No, you're not. No, you're not. You are not in charge of that. That is God's role. He says it in His Word that He will be the one to reveal everything. Your job is to be like Christ through the process of that. And being like Christ is not retaliating, but it's forgiving. Blessing the person, surrendering the situation, and then letting the Holy Spirit heal you. Because there's nothing else that's going to heal you. It doesn't matter how much you could speak up. It doesn't matter how much you can control the narrative. It doesn't matter how much you show the receipts and bring things to the light yourself, which God never told you to do. You were never supposed to play God and do it yourself. Those things are not actually going to heal you. Revenge, cussing the person out is not going to heal you. What's going to heal you is being at the feet of Jesus and letting him speak to you and say, honey, I am so sorry that this has happened to you. And I want you to know that I'm not okay with this. I'm not okay with the ways that you were hurt. And the thing is, like, yeah, God can be obsessed and love the other person, but another thing that he makes very clear in His Word is that he holds, holds each and every one of us accountable for our actions. Let the fear of the Lord fall on you when it comes to your actions. Like, hearing that, it's not even just about like, yeah, well, the Lord will judge you. The Lord will also judge you. The Lord is also judging us. And so let us walk in a way that we know would make the Lord proud, believing that when he says, I judge everybody fairly and justly on their actions. So saying, okay, God, I trust you. When you say that you are a just God and you don't like what was done to me, you're not in support of that. And I believe that you have a plan to make this right, to straighten these paths. The Lord will handle that situation. The Lord will handle that person. And he will also handle you. He will also comfort you. He will also heal you. Overcoming Betrayal the only way to truly overcome that is by needing Jesus and Jesus alone. He's the only thing that will get you out of that. Romans 12:19 reads, do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written, it is mine to avenge, I will repay, says the Lord. This emphasizes that vengeance isn't our job. Our role is to trust God with the outcome. Matthew 5:44 reads, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. This is a challenging but transformative principle. Instead of focusing on how to pay someone back, we focus on lifting them up in prayer, which can also bring us healing. Romans 12:18 encourages us, if it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Sometimes reconciliation is achievable and sometimes it isn't. But the call is to strive for peace rather than escalate conflict. Ephesians 4:31 32 reads, get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger and instead be kind and compassionate, forgiving each other. Just as God forgave us, this shifts the focus from dwelling on the betrayal to releasing it and finding freedom in compassion. And again, this isn't like an overnight thing. I think that betrayal is something that we will be practicing to overcome with the Lord over and over again, depending on what it looks like. It is a pruning, sanctifying and humbling process to forgive somebody who honestly, in your eyes, don't deserve forgiveness. But that is when we really need to remember the truth of the Gospel of like. We didn't either. Jesus honestly didn't deserve to die on the cross. He didn't. He didn't have to. He shouldn't have. We didn't deserve his forgiveness with the ways that we have sinned against him, taken matters into our own hands, flat out resisted him, partaken in blasphemy, like, mocked his name, mocked his word. We don't deserve forgiveness. And so it really is that Scripture of like as Freely that we receive, we should freely give. And so the ways that we have freely received God's forgiveness at no price that we had to give, it was actually in the price of Jesus giving his life. Like he took on that debt. We have no right to not forgive other people. We have to. Like, if you've received the forgiveness and the grace of Jesus, if you believe that he died on the cross for you and you have received that freedom through him, you don't have any right to just take that and not also freely give that same forgiveness and grace to other people. Like, if we're gonna take that from Jesus, we also are signing up for. And I will also die to myself the same way that you died for me on the cross. I will resist my flesh the same way that you did. Jesus, like, you picked up your cross and carried it for me. And so I'm going to pick up my cross and carry it for that other person. We can't freely receive from Jesus and not also freely give. We can't take on all the perks of the crucifixion, death, and resurrection of Jesus without also walking out the gospel. He did that not only to free us from our sins, but so that we could also be an example of that same grace towards other people. And so betrayal is just another opportunity to do that. And I think making it less about the betrayal and less about what that person has done to you and more about what you can do in the situation and how you can move forward with grace and forgiveness and healing. And that should be what's in focus more than what that person did to you or, like, how they're now moving forward after doing that to you. And if there was a specific person who came to your mind in this episode or a situation, or maybe a group of people, I would challenge you that after this episode, you sit in a place with Jesus where there is no distractions. And you could either journal, you could speak out loud to him, but, like, however that works for you with Jesus, however you could process with Him. But I really would encourage you to practice all the things that we talked about today. So, like, getting alone with Jesus, voicing out all the ways that you know that you've still been bitter towards this person and pleading the blood of Jesus over your mind and your heart, and asking him to take away any calloused, hardened parts of your heart towards that person, for him to take it away and replace it with a heart of flesh that you actually have a soft and compassionate heart towards this person, repent to him for that. And then genuinely pray for the person. And then call on the Holy Spirit to heal you and say, jesus, I need your healing. Please be near to me. It says in his word that he is near. He is close to the brokenhearted. And so if you are brokenhearted, he is near, call on him and he will comfort you. I also would love to just end this episode in prayer for you guys. I'd love to just pray for you and lift you up. That if there has been a burden of unforgiveness and bitterness because of a way that you've been betrayed or hurt by somebody, I just pray for freedom for you, that it's not something that you have to carry anymore from this moment on, like, literally after this moment on, you will not be carrying the burden and the weight of unforgiveness and resentment anymore. Because the truth is, is, like, when we carry bitterness and resentment, it feels like it's like, yeah, that's what they deserve. Like, they don't deserve my forgiveness. They don't deserve for me to have, like, peace in my heart about them. What do you mean? There's a quote that I've seen online that says something along the lines of, like, unforgiveness is like drinking poison, expecting for it to actually kill the other person, but it just kills you. Like the poison of bitterness and unforgiveness in your heart. You think by drinking that it's gonna. But it actually, you're just killing yourself. You're hurting yourself. You're burdening yourself. You're putting yourself in bondage. And it doesn't actually do what we think it does to the other person. And so, Jesus, I lift up my friend on the other end of this podcast right now. Lord, Father, I ask for the comfort of your holy Spirit to consume wherever they're at. God, I pray that your spirit fills the space that they're in. It fills their heart. God, I pray that they can actually tangibly feel your love and compassion. Lord, I pray that they feel the way that you are angered for them, that this isn't something that you're okay with. What was done to them is not something that was overlooked by you or was done behind your back in a way that you didn't see. Like, you saw everything, God, you saw everything. You saw what other people didn't see. And so, Lord, I thank you that your promise to them is that you saw it and you will defend them, that there is nothing that slips by you. There is nothing that could just get by you. That you don't make right, God, that that is who you are, that you make wrong right. And you take what was meant for evil and you use it for your good and your glory. And so, Lord, I pray that you do a new thing in my friend's heart today. God, will you please restore their heart, Lord, Will you bring healing to their heart? Will you take the calloused, hardened parts of their hearts and make it soft and new, God, to the parts of their hearts that have been bruised and are like turning black? I pray that you bring it to a place of health and you make it pink again and it's warm and it's not cold, that they don't have to carry the heaviness of bitterness anymore. Lord, I pray the peace of the Holy Spirit over them, a peace that surpasses all understanding, God, that when we say your peace surpasses all understanding, it means that it does not make sense. Like in the midst of the circumstances, in the midst of the betrayal, in the midst of the hurt and the pain, it actually does not make sense how they have peace. I pray that peace over them. In the mighty name of Jesus, I rebuke all attempts of the enemy to put them in bondage of unforgiveness and bitterness. God, I pray that you give them the strength to actually repay evil with blessings. That that is what we are called to do as followers of Christ, is to bless the ones who hurt us, to love our enemies when it is the hardest to forgive, the ones who we once called friends, who we once called our partners, who we once called people we trusted. God, that those people who hurt us, Lord, we lift them up, we pray for them and we bless them. God. God, I pray for my friend here that you actually make them an even more humble version of themselves, an even more graceful version of themselves, an even more forgiving version of themselves, Lord, that there is always opportunity to become more like you. And so I bless them in that way, God, let them be an example of who you are. Let them be your hands and feet here on earth as they forgive and love others the same way that you have forgiven and loved us, the same way that you forgave and loved Peter, that you forgave and loved Judas. Let us be like you, Jesus. God, I pray healing over them, Lord, heal and restore their hearts, God. And I also pray for the person that hurt them, to the people that hurt them, God, restore them, Jesus, we need you. We all need you, Lord, help us, God. We can't do anything without you. I pray this in the mighty name of Jesus God, I plead your blood over my friend in Jesus name. Amen. I love you guys. I'm proud of you. And what's so appropriate about our outro today? This is what we always say, but it's especially appropriate today is that before we go, can we do something cool today? Can we show somebody how cool Jesus is? Can we walk more like him, Talk more like him, Forgive like Jesus, Trust our heavenly Father, as Jesus did. I love you guys. Have a beautiful weekend. Have an incredible week and I will see you in the next episode. Bye.