Club Shay Shay – Dr. Cheyenne Bryant Part 2 (December 3, 2025)
Episode Overview
In this substantial, lively episode of Club Shay Shay, host Shannon Sharpe continues his in-depth conversation with psychologist and life coach Dr. Cheyenne Bryant. They delve deeper into the realities of modern relationships, gender roles, fidelity, mental health, and the pressures of public life. The conversation balances personal anecdotes, clinical insights, and candid explorations of topics like toxic relationships, financial dynamics in dating, emotional health in pro sports, and intergenerational shifts in partnership expectations. Dr. Bryant shares openly about her life, her family history, career milestones, and the nuances that shape her philosophies on love, sex, and self-worth.
Key Topics & Insights
1. Red Flags and Toxic Relationships
-
Spotting Toxicity Early
- Dr. Bryant asserts red flags in relationships appear “in the first interaction,” but are often ignored, especially by those desperate for connection.
- “There’s people who have a full plate…and there’s people that have an empty plate and they want anything just to fall on it…That’s called desperation.” – Dr. Bryant (03:00)
-
Fairy Tale Thinking
- People project an idealized image onto partners, ignoring reality:
- “I wish you were wine but you water. We are not Jesus. We are not turning water to wine, right? This is always going to be water.” – Dr. Bryant (04:29)
-
Can Toxic Relationships Be Fixed?
- Yes, but only with hard work, willingness, and mutual therapy (individual and couple’s):
- "If you got it, you're going to project it. We are all just little projectors walking around here.” – Dr. Bryant (06:23)
2. Gender Roles, Finances, and Respect in Relationships
- Shifts In Dating Norms
- Shannon recounts his upbringing and confusion over shifts to “50/50” expectations:
- “When did the 50/50 come into effect?” – Shannon Sharpe (09:19)
- Dr. Bryant traces the rise of “desperation” and also the rise of women who want to build as equals, rather than being taken care of. Different types of women approach “splitting” finances for distinct reasons (09:54).
- Masculinity, Provision, and Respect
- Dr. Bryant discusses how being the breadwinner in her own life affected her view and respect for her two fiancés:
- When she provided financially, her respect dynamic changed.
- “When a man can’t provide…he naturally emasculates himself.” – Dr. Bryant (11:18)
- “My love or respect for (the man providing) was very different … I couldn’t wait to cook for him.” – Dr. Bryant (13:04)
- Dr. Bryant discusses how being the breadwinner in her own life affected her view and respect for her two fiancés:
3. Fidelity, Side Relationships, and Self-Worth
- Why Are Some Attracted to Married People?
- Both men and women cross boundaries, but for different reasons:
- “A man…just wants to sleep with you. The woman…wants her position.” – Dr. Bryant (21:02)
- Women are often attracted to married men who are good husbands (even if not faithful).
- Side Chick Reality
- Dr. Bryant explains—being a “side chick” is “not a flex.” Most married men do more for their wives. “You are this man's pacifier… You are not his promised land whatsoever.” (28:05)
- Self-worth discussion: “You cannot value yourself and see yourself in the position of two or three.” (28:36)
- Signs of Cheating
- Men often cheat out of lust; women cheat out of vindictiveness or unmet emotional needs.
- “Can you love a dog?”... “Can you love a woman who has deceived you and has the capacity to do it again?” – Dr. Bryant (39:56-40:06)
4. Dating, Preferences, and Submissiveness
- On Submission
- Dr. Bryant explains she’s naturally “submissive,” but only to men she respects and chooses:
- “If you can't respect him, you shouldn't choose him.” (15:28)
- Public vs. Private Relationships
- Prefers privacy until marriage or engagement. Public exposure makes reconciliation harder and increases scrutiny (59:40).
- Younger vs. Older Partners
- She’s attracted to men who have no kids (“I’m not polyamorous, I only need one.”), and finds younger men often more mature and relationship-oriented nowadays (94:49, 96:33).
5. Sex, Intimacy, and Connection
- Sexual Dynamics
- She’s not into casual sex; real intimacy should be built on connection, not surface-level experiences:
- “A man should penetrate your heart and your mind before he ever penetrates your body.” (32:14)
- The less casual, the better the sex: “When you plug into a man or woman…that is nasty, not just freaky…You can’t get that anywhere.” (35:20)
- Sex & Arguments
- Prefers intimacy after disagreements to restore connection, with humor:
- “I need skin to skin. I want you in my skin. …I want you to unzip [your hoodie], I want to hop in it…” (83:02)
6. Life Choices, Family, and Parenthood
- On Terminated Teenage Pregnancies
- Dr. Bryant discusses her choice, supported by her father, and how it affected her:
- “My father allowed me to beat odds that were against me.” (74:56)
- The experience shaped her trust in men and appreciation for male leadership.
- Motherhood Plans
- She’s now in her “choosing stage,” stating she is ready for motherhood and wants twins if possible. Prioritizes having her life and career stable first before becoming a parent (66:16-68:29).
- “Your relationships become a lot more prosperous when you choose from a place of health rather than desperation.” (69:45)
- Advice to Women
- Advocates for dating widely, but not necessarily sleeping with multiple partners, and prioritizing self-worth and discernment.
7. Mental Health, Especially in Black & Athletic Communities
- Emotional Suppression vs. Expression in Black Men
- Dr. Bryant notes the suicide rate among Black men was lower when emotions were suppressed. Now, emotional awareness is rising (which is good), but lacking safe outlets can lead to depression or worse (105:31).
- “When there’s no place to dump it…anything that we internalize at some point is going to externalize in some form of action.” (105:31)
- Role in the NFL
- Highlights her work with players (Steelers, Browns) providing safe spaces for emotional release and growth:
- “Boundaries are not for people, they’re for us, and they are emotional regulators” (106:37)
- Highlights her work with players (Steelers, Browns) providing safe spaces for emotional release and growth:
- Suicide & Depression: Signs and Support
- Advocates for deeper check-ins, not just “you good?” but intentional, insistent conversations and interventions (108:35)
- “We have to start creating safer spaces for our loved ones. Loved ones don’t mean someone you live with … the check-ins should be there.” (109:17)
- Emphasizes that many young players have entitled families, not supportive ones, which exacerbates stress and loneliness (110:36).
8. Book: Mental Detox
- The book teaches readers to “detox your mind of negative thinking,” improve emotional intelligence, and become intentional about their behaviors and goals.
- Uses a garden metaphor—seeds (thoughts) planted to bear the fruit you want in life (118:30).
- Success with self-publishing led to a deal with Hay House; features a forward by Lala Anthony and support from 50 Cent.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- On Desperation in Relationships:
“Desperation means I'm coming in with my own idea of what I want you to be... I'm afraid to see you for who you are...” (03:43) - On Projecting in Relationships:
“Everything I have, you're all going to feel it. So I'm just projecting onto you who I am.” (06:23) - On Cheating:
“Can you learn to love a dog?... Now this Negro, this Cane Corso needs that steak because he already got a taste of blood…Can I do that?” (39:34–39:49) - On Womanhood & Career:
“I would love to marry a man of affluence…but I don’t want to be known as [just] Shannon's wife. I want to be known as Dr. Bryant.” (102:29) - On Fathers & Daughters:
“He was the last face I seen walking in to termination and they were the first faces I seen walking out. That is what a parent does, that is what a great father does.” (76:56) - On Choosing Partners with Wisdom:
“I am now in the pit of my power, not in my biological clock.” (81:44) - On Sex & Emotional Connection:
“People are having horrible sex too. Cause all they doing is casually and they’re calling freaky good sex.” (35:00) - On Mental Health for Athletes:
“Boundaries are not for people. They’re for us – and they are emotional regulators.” (106:37) - On Growth:
“20 year old Cheyenne, straight shooter but probably bullets flying at everybody, right? 40 year old Cheyenne, straight shooter knows her target.” (91:09)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Toxicity in Relationships and Red Flags – 02:37–05:05
- Fixing Toxic Partnerships – 05:05–07:51
- Gender Roles, Finances, Respect – 07:51–16:14
- Married Men, Affairs, Side Relationships – 19:44–32:19
- Cheating: How Men & Women Differ – 37:45–43:11
- Amicable Breakups – 43:11–45:08
- On Submission, Energy, and Sex – 13:04–17:40 | 32:19–36:40
- Privacy in Relationships – 59:40–61:42
- Abortion, Parenting & Father’s Influence – 73:19–79:53
- On Wanting Children & Family Planning – 66:16–69:44
- Generational Changes (20s vs 40s) – 91:06–94:01
- Mental Health in Black Community/Athletes – 105:16–117:36
- The Book: Mental Detox – 117:34–120:52
Conclusion
This episode of Club Shay Shay provides a vibrant, unfiltered look into the evolving landscape of Black relationships, modern womanhood, masculinity, vulnerability, and success. Dr. Cheyenne Bryant offers powerful, lived–and clinically informed–advice that serves both men and women seeking meaning, intimacy, and self-respect. Her personal stories—about love, loss, career, and choices—are intertwined with takeaways for anyone on the journey of self-discovery or struggling to understand the modern dating world.
Quote to Remember:
“Your relationships become a lot more prosperous when you choose from a place of health rather than desperation.” – Dr. Cheyenne Bryant (69:45)
Book Mention:
“Mental Detox” by Dr. Cheyenne Bryant
