Club Shay Shay - HaHa Davis Part 1

Summary

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Club Shay Shay – HaHa Davis Part 1 (June 10, 2026)

Host: Shannon Sharpe
Guest: HaHa Davis

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Overview

In this engaging and unfiltered episode of Club Shay Shay, NFL Hall of Famer Shannon Sharpe sits down with viral comedian and content creator HaHa Davis. Together, they explore the evolution of internet comedy, relationships, fame, money, and the realities of life off-camera. Their conversation is full of humor, honesty, and sharp cultural commentary, making it a must-listen for fans of pop culture and comedy alike.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Business of Internet Comedy

• Skit Budgets & The Viral Push

  • The conversation opens with a discussion of content budgets and HaHa’s reaction to comedian Drewski reportedly spending $100,000 on a single skit, highlighting the wild arms race in viral comedy.

    “I gave me 100,000… Ooh, you a different breed, big bro.”
    — HaHa Davis, (03:03)

• The Evolution from Vine to Millions of Followers

  • HaHa shares his journey from shooting DIY skits on Vine and YouTube to achieving global fandom.

    “I started on vine… six-second Vine. You had to be funny immediately.”
    — HaHa Davis, (53:02)

• Monetizing Fame (or Not)

  • There’s a real discussion on how being ‘internet famous’ doesn’t instantly mean you’re making good money:

    “You famous and broke. Living out my momma’s basement. Still wasn’t making no money down there, really.”
    — HaHa Davis, (62:44)

  • They compare new influencer wealth to OG comedians grinding the ‘chitlin circuit’, and the sometimes resentful attitudes of the older guard.
  • HaHa breaks down new realities:

    “I did 20 million views last month… I made $400 bucks.”
    — HaHa Davis on YouTube’s short-form model, (68:43)

2. Fame, Relationships & Male Insecurity

• Showing Off for Women

  • The men agree much of what men do (jewelry, clothes, even conflict) is done to attract and impress women.

    “If it wasn’t no women in the world, you think we’d be buying all this jewelry?… We do this to impress women.”
    — HaHa Davis, (09:48)

• Relationship Dynamics

  • They hilariously debate double standards—especially the way partners dress with their friends vs. their significant others.

    "My girl wearing trench coat in the club with me… When she go with her homegirl, she think she on the beach, she half naked."
    — HaHa Davis, (18:41)

• Infidelity, Phones, and Trust

  • Both recall the pain and comedy in getting ‘caught’ cheating, the pitfalls of phone snooping, and why they avoid it at all costs.

    “If you go looking for it, you gon’ find it… leave them women phones alone.”
    — HaHa Davis, (38:20)

• Open Relationships & Regret

  • HaHa candidly describes participating in 'swinging' for the experience…and why it’s not for him:

    "We have… tried a little swinging. But oh, Lord, you don’t want nobody else doing that to your lady.”
    — HaHa Davis, (23:00)

  • His comic regret resonates:

    “Man, I was curled up in the bed for three days straight. Three of them.”
    — HaHa Davis, (25:18)

3. Industry Relationships & Celebrity Wisdom

• Support from Snoop Dogg

  • Snoop’s mentorship and willingness to show love is a recurring theme:

    “There’s no man on earth I respect more than Snoop Dogg for what he did for me.”
    — HaHa Davis, (60:51)

  • Snoop’s advice:

    “Don’t try to run to Hollywood too fast — they serving out humble pie.”
    — HaHa Davis, paraphrasing Snoop, (61:51)

• Meeting Jay Z

  • HaHa shares the surreal moment of being contacted and advised by Jay Z:

    “Jay Z said, bro, I thought you was gone… The little homie from Seven Mile and Moraine, east side of Detroit… That was crazy.”
    — HaHa Davis, (76:52)

  • Jay Z’s business advice:

    “He said, all these slogans, you need to copyright them… labels pay millions of dollars to get slogans like this.”
    — HaHa Davis, (76:14)

• Taking a Stand – Derrick Henry & Old Spice

  • HaHa discusses brands using his "double word" catchphrase and Derrick Henry getting Old Spice to pay up:

    “He made them people pay me. That was the realest thing Derrick Henry did.”
    — HaHa Davis, (77:18)

4. Culture and Comedy Legacy

• Social Media Comedians Mount Rushmore (55:05)

  • HaHa lists his picks:

    • DC Young Fly
    • Desi Banks
    • Drewski
    • Himself (HaHa Davis)

  • Discussion about Fat Boy SSE’s influence and mutual respect among creators.

• Catchphrases & Impact

  • HaHa Davis’s top catchphrases:

    • “Beyond me”
    • “Big fella”
    • “This finna be a breeze”
    • “Guard”
    • “I ain’t never ever seen you act like this”
      — (57:54)

  • On the enduring fan love:

    “I got so many… I came up with like 40 or 50 catchphrases.”
    — HaHa Davis, (58:11) “I did all that in my mom’s basement… shot all them videos on that white wall for the last 10 years.”
    — HaHa Davis, (59:03)

• Comedy and OGs

  • The pair explores the difference between viral and traditional standup career paths, expressing respect for both but recognizing the unique skill of digital content.

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Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• On the viral video arms race:

  “$100,000 for a skit? Ooh, you a different breed, big bro.” (03:03) — HaHa Davis

• On relationship insecurity:

  “My girl wearing trench coat in the club with me… when she go with her homegirl, she think she on the beach, she half naked.” (18:41) — HaHa Davis

• On modern relationships:

  “Don’t nobody just want to be with one person… It’s a mental thing, I believe.” (36:53) — HaHa Davis

• On fame and money:

  “You famous and broke. Living out my momma’s basement. Still wasn’t making no money down there, really.” (62:44) — HaHa Davis

• On mentorship:

  “There’s no man on earth I respect more than Snoop Dogg for what he did for me.” (60:51) — HaHa Davis

• Jay Z’s advice:

  “He said, all these slogans, you need to copyright them…labels pay millions of dollars to get slogans like this.” (76:14) — HaHa Davis

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Memorable & Funny Moments

• Burner social media accounts:
  “Every man got a burner page…you go to her homegirl’s page and watch your girl doing all night.” (17:44) — HaHa Davis
• Relationship heartbreak over ‘swinging’:
  “Man, I was curled up in the bed for three days straight. Three of them.” (25:18) — HaHa Davis
• HaHa’s legacy in internet comedy:
  “If they don’t know you exist, this mine. 98.9% of the stuff I came up with was on me.” (56:09) — HaHa Davis

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Important Timestamps for Segments

• [03:03] — Skit budgets and viral comedy arms race
• [09:48] — Men showing off for women
• [18:41] — Relationship double standards in dress
• [23:00] — HaHa on swinging and “never again”
• [34:29] — Monogamy debate and cheating stories
• [39:01] — Hiding numbers/cheating with “Pizza Hut” contacts
• [55:05] — HaHa’s social media comedian Mount Rushmore
• [57:54] — Top five HaHa Davis catchphrases
• [60:51] — Snoop Dogg’s mentorship
• [76:14] — Jay Z’s advice and copyright on slogans
• [77:18] — Derrick Henry gets HaHa paid for his catchphrases

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Tone and Style

• Candid, comedic, and occasionally raw
• Vulnerable and self-deprecating honesty
• Direct language and lively back-and-forth, with heavy use of slang and cultural references

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Conclusion

This episode of Club Shay Shay provides not just laughs, but a behind-the-scenes look at the creative grind, the evolution of viral comedy, and the personal and business challenges of living in the social media spotlight. HaHa Davis’s stories—equal parts hilarious, authentic, and revealing—make for a rich portrait of today’s entertainment world.

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Next up: Listen to Part 2, available now on the Club Shay Shay podcast feed!

Transcript

[Narrator/Advertiser]

I turned off news altogether.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I hate to say it, but I

[Funny Mike]

don't trust much of anything.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's the rage bait.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

It feels like it's trying to divide people.

[Kal Penn]

We got clear facts. Maybe we could calm down a little. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the Facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What's up, y'?

[Funny Mike]

All?

[Shannon Sharpe]

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[Kal Penn]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

Drew Ski said he spent $100,000 on the church skit, but he didn't make any money from it.

[Funny Mike]

$100,000 for a skit?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Way over there, I got about $150, $200 on the skit. I gave me 100,000.

[Funny Mike]

I got my phone biscuit free Better go outside and film what's on my mind $100,000 for a skit? Ooh, you a different breed, big bro like he making it hard for any other guys to come off the Internet. That's what they gonna expect. Like I'm looking, I'm looking at my number. I said, my number's down a little bit. He taking it to another level. All my life been grinding all my

[Shannon Sharpe]

life Sacrifice, hustle, paid the price, wanna slice, got to roll a dice that's

[Funny Mike]

why all my life I've been grinding

[Shannon Sharpe]

all my life Look.

[Funny Mike]

All my life been grinding all my

[Shannon Sharpe]

life Sacrifice, hustle, paid the price, wanna slice, got the roll a dice that's

[Funny Mike]

why all my life I've been grinding

[Shannon Sharpe]

all my life we would first like to thank Double Barrel and the Whiskey Shop for having us today's episode of Club Shay Shay. If you're in Beverly Hills, come by for a drink in this elegant lounge. Now onto today's episode. Hello. Welcome to another episode of Club Shay Shay. I am your host, Shannon Sharpe. I'm also the proprietor of Club Shay Shay. Stopping by for conversation on the drink today is a pop culture sensation. He's credited for the double word phenomenon, Funny Man. Funny Man. Yeah, that's him. Hey, you did the crime. Now you and I about to do some time. God, you acting unusual, big fella. He's a hilarious comedian, a viral Internet star, a content creator, a larger than life Persona, A favorite of the comedy circuit with millions of fans worldwide. He'll tell you a joke, but he'll never tell you a lie. Detroit's own Mr. Bigfellow himself. Ha ha. David.

[Funny Mike]

How you doing, brother? Yes, sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I like that.

[Funny Mike]

You almost had me crying with the way you introduced me. Look, you see what I brought with me, though? What you brought that for? Cause I wanna see if you still got it. You still got it. You think you still got it? Let me see.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What? Let me see.

[Funny Mike]

You think you still got it?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Sit down.

[Funny Mike]

He still got. I wanna see if. If he really played in the league. Farice, he can go back right now. Today.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, I can play for the Lions a little bit.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Let me go.

[Funny Mike]

Put that down. I don't even want to touch that. No, More now, what you were saying?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Welcome to Club Shay. Shay, man, thanks for stopping by, man. I appreciate your time.

[Funny Mike]

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Bro, when you come by, man, you tearing it up. You doing your thing. And I've always, like, you know, man, I want to get an opportunity to sit down and have a conversation with him. Bro, you funny. Your skits. Yes, bro, you do your thing.

[Funny Mike]

I appreciate it. I used to watch you use my words on Undisputed Arguments. That was the dopest. This is beyond me. I say, look, Shannon, you keep my name alive out here.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So that's what I'm trying to do, bro.

[Funny Mike]

Thank you, man.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Look, let me know what you think, man. I know you. Are you a. You probably a connoisseur.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I used to. I was drinking the cognac for a minute, but I got up about £200 walking around looking like a ball of meat. So I switched over to vodka because vodka, you know, is gluten free. See, a lot of people don't read the fine print. Yeah, the fiber. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

200 pounds.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. I was looking like a little ball of meat.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And so how much you weigh now?

[Funny Mike]

Like, I'm about 165.

[Shannon Sharpe]

165? Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. I went to the gym. I went to the gym for six months and I lost all that weight. Did you? I was going to the gym every day.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You wasn't on that zip, were you?

[Funny Mike]

No, I ain't. I ain't had a zip.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay. I just thought it was.

[Funny Mike]

We did it naturally, though. Look, look, you go see the proof on the page, you know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay.

[Funny Mike]

I was £200, but I was going to the gym every day. I had on a. I had a sauna suit on and I had a 40 pound weight vest on. I was trying to kill myself.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Were you? I mean, was your health impacted? Was anything? So what made you decide to lose that weight? Did you just look at the mirror? One look in the mirror one, and it's like, man, I'm too heavy for this frame. Was it health related? Why did you decide to lose that weight?

[Funny Mike]

Just came. The guy woke up one day, looked in the mirror and said, no, this ain't it. Yeah, he just went to the gym like, come on, you look crazy and I'm already a short guy.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I look crazy.

[Funny Mike]

Ain't no reason to be this little. You £200 like you get together. My girl wasn't looking at me the same.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She looking at your side?

[Funny Mike]

I like she was looking at people your size. Y' all need me some six, eight, and a half. What you saying? Seven, eleven.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Now, I ain't a six' two. I wear 250, though. You six' two? Six, two, two, fifty. Damn. So I.

[Funny Mike]

They had hit that every day, boss.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Whoa, whoa, man. You had a skit. You had a skit the other day. You walked up to the. And the homeboy was talking to a lady, and you like, hey, man, you remember that time I took them 12 bricks off, old boy? Yeah, man, I got. Yeah, I had to have that. Yeah, I had to have that. Then, you know, he called 12 on me. 12. Guy behind me, man, I was in and out of traffic.

[Funny Mike]

Look, I got in the. I pulled the pilot out the helicopter. Got in the helicopter over the ocean, the engine give out on me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

I'd have had to swim a thousand feet out and 2,000ft deep. Now, you know damn well that didn't happen.

[Shannon Sharpe]

God, do guys really be trying to shine for women and they be telling these.

[Funny Mike]

That's a real thing. Like men. We really show off for women, bro. Right? Like. And, you know, half of these things did happen. She know, too.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But it sound good, though.

[Funny Mike]

It sound good, though. You make it sound good.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, because you. Hey.

[Funny Mike]

You like, hey, bro.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey, man, I remember I took them bricks off, old boy.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, man. Yeah. He pissed off, but it wasn't nothing he could do.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, he was confused, like, bro, I don't remember none of that happening.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Are they sober when they say this, or they just be trying to shine? They drunk. I mean. Cause obviously when you drunk, you saying things that you always wanted to say sober, and then that gives you an excuse. But if you around your homeboys, your homeboys know why you trying to.

[Funny Mike]

Everybody got that one homeboy in their life. They always take it overboard when they get drunk. Everybody got that one. I'm the homeboy. I do it all the time, unnecessarily.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Is that what you guys did when you were growing up? I mean, the nice lady that you wanted to meet, you wanted to impress her. She didn't know anything about you. She might be from a different town, different county. And all of a sudden, you come around and you telling her all the things that you've done, even though you've done none of that.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Cause back then, you ain't had no money, see? You had to impress her with the lies, right? You know what I mean? I was impressing her with the lies. I ain't had no money, had nothing going on. And I Was the shortest guy in the school. So for me, the women ain't really. Look at me. I had to like, really go, you

[Shannon Sharpe]

know what I mean?

[Funny Mike]

Put some work in to get a chick out there. I was like, dang, bro. You got all the girls in high school. I can't get one of them.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Did you play sports?

[Funny Mike]

I played football.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, you played football?

[Funny Mike]

I played a lot of ball.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, so you like that?

[Funny Mike]

I was like that. Played cornerback.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But no, no. If you play in sports, you know, they like the sports, guys.

[Funny Mike]

That was the popularity. That's what gave me the popularity. Yeah. Yeah. But I was just. I was on the shorter side of it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay.

[Funny Mike]

But overall, the women like the guys. That was 6 2, 6 3, 6 4. I was 411 in 11th grade.

[Shannon Sharpe]

4 11.

[Funny Mike]

These last little 7 inches, I got, like, on the back end. You gotta keep saying Paul. You know how people be. You gotta pause everything these days. Yeah, crazy.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I think you said something about, dude, homeboy called you out. Cause you had on his clothes. He was around a young lady and he said, hey, bro. Hey, is that my shirt?

[Funny Mike]

Is that my shirt? Like, bro, you notice your shirt. You notice your shirt? Like, bro. You couldn't wait till she left to ask that? Come on. People be showing off, bro.

[Shannon Sharpe]

They be doing that.

[Funny Mike]

Men be showing off. We be showing off for women. I'm telling you, if it wasn't no women. If it wasn't no women in the world, you think we'd be buying all this jewelry and all this? We do this to impress women. We wouldn't do it to impress another man.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It wouldn't be no beef or nothing like that going on.

[Funny Mike]

There wouldn't be nothing going on. It wasn't no women on Earth. None of this be going on. Look, look, I wouldn't have had his watch on. You wouldn't have that watch on, right? Look, we give all this back right now. If there wasn't no women around. That's what we do it for. That's a fact. That's a fact.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hold on, man. You ever dated a young lady and have her come home drunk?

[Funny Mike]

Yep, yep.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I'm talking. Hold on now. Hold up. I understand. Like, I ain't talking about. She, like, little tipsy, where she kiki ki ing and everything. I'm talking about. She like. She, like, really tore up.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah. Yes, I have. Yep.

[Shannon Sharpe]

How you deal with that, bro?

[Funny Mike]

It depends on what type of night you want to have, though. Like, if she on that, then you on that, right? Let's get up to this room. We finna put you through this mattress.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But hold on. How is that any fun if both of you guys tore up?

[Funny Mike]

No, that's the only time it ain't fun. That's the only time it ain't fun. Like, I enjoy. Like, when my girl. If I'm drunk, I don't want her to be drunk.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Funny Mike]

Somebody gotta get us home.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Somebody gotta be sober.

[Funny Mike]

Somebody gotta get us home.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Most times I'm the one that's drunk and belligerent and don't even remember what I did yesterday. Thinking everything gonna be normal tomorrow. Like, you forgot what you said to me last night. Sir, you acting a whole fool in here. You ain't the same. No, see, that was Carlos. They ha. They ain't ha. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So do you have an understanding? Okay, we have an understanding. Baby, you going out with the girls. Hey, don't take it too far. Cause you know, it's dangerous out here like that of, you know, you and her together, okay, that's one thing. Cause you can watch a six, right? But when she out with the ladies and she get a certain way, everybody, you know, might scatter and do their own thing.

[Funny Mike]

See, my girl don't even get drunk like that. Like, she only can drink two or three shots, and then she through, okay? Her night's over, right? Like, it'd be early night for her, huh? Her night's over. She take two or three shots, she's done for the day. You won't see her again till tomorrow, I can promise you. But I don't want no girl who. You know what I mean? Nobody want to be with no woman that just get belligerently drinking. Yeah.

[Pets Best Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Are you attractive? Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

It's not attractive for me to do it for myself.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

Sometimes I look at the mirror like, man, you drunk as mother.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You know, the ladies used to tell me, say, oh, I know I could drink you under the table. And like, that's a big thing. Oh, I take. I can drink like eight, nine shots. And I'm looking like. And at that point in time, I had never had a drink before. I like it. Ain't gonna take much. I say one, you got me and you talking about you up here bragging, talking about you could take eight, nine shots.

[Funny Mike]

And when you was in the league, you didn't drink?

[Shannon Sharpe]

No.

[Funny Mike]

At all?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Nope.

[Funny Mike]

So you start drinking.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When I created my own cognac, okay? Never had a drink, never smoked, never did any of that.

[Funny Mike]

Damn, that's dope. Matter of fact, let me take a shot of it. So I know exactly what's going on with your cognac. Yes sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Well we gonna send you what made with a bottle so you yes sir. We got the best VSOP on the market. The NBA Finals are here, but the action doesn't stop when the confetti falls in. The NBA crowned the champion because the star studies scorching Summer of Sports Women's basketball, baseball are heating up and we've got the world's largest soccer tournament on American soil and the first ever MMA fight on the White House lawn. Make your picks for all these events and more this summer on Prize Picks. America's number one sports pick out. These playoffs have been electric. Victor Wembanyama has been out of his damn mind. More, more more legacies on the line of the 2026 NBA Finals. Get action on the biggest NBA games of the season and make your picks on everything. Points, rebounds, dunks, three pointers, fantasy scores. Before the NBA Champion is crowned, Prize Picks is a preferred partner of the NBA. Download the app today. Use code Shannon to get $50 instantly in lineups when you play your first five dollar lineup. That's code Shannon to get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup. Prize picks a preferred partner of the

[Narrator/Advertiser]

NBA do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA, in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snore loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don'tsleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lilly, a medicine company. I turned off news altogether.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I hate to say it, but I

[Funny Mike]

don't trust much of anything.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's the rage bait.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

It feels like it's trying to divide people.

[Kal Penn]

We got clear facts. Maybe we could calm down a little. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the Facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America.

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[Redfin Advertiser]

about modern home shopping. It's sort of become a fun side hobby, right Scrolling listings at night dreaming about kitchens you've never seen or backyards you haven't even stepped foot in. All from the comfort of pretty much anywhere. Redfin knows a lot of people like you want to own but are stuck in this browsing mode loop. That's where Redfin flips the script. With listings that update within minutes and tours you can book right from the Redfin app, you can see your dream home the moment it appears. Now, liking a listing is easy, but actually landing it? That's where Redfin comes in. Redfin has over 2200 agents with local expertise, and Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. That means they want to help you win, not just window shop. Redfin is built to help you go from just looking to wait. This could actually be home. So become the newest neighbor on the block. Visit redfin.com to start finding and start owning. That's redfin.com hey everyone, it's Cal Penn,

[Kal Penn]

host of Irsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Wil Wheaton, who played Gordie Lachance in stand by me 40 years ago and now narrates Stephen King's the Body, the novella that inspired it all. We talk about what it's like to return to a story that shaped his life, channeling his memories of River Phoenix in the recording booth, and why the friendships you have at 12 might be the most important ones you'll ever have. I know Gordie Lachance. I am Gordy Lachance. Like, I mean, even when I was a little kid, I was Gordy Lachance when I didn't know it. Listen to Hearsay, the Audible and iHeart audiobook club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Do you feel some type of way your girl go out dress one way with you, but go out a totally different dress a totally different way with a homegirl?

[Funny Mike]

Of course. Cause why, like, my girl will be fully clothed when she with me. But I'd have seen her sometimes. Like, I went to her homegirl story. See you only every man got a burner page. Look, I'm gonna put y' all on some games, okay? Every man got a burner page. You gonna go to your burner page and go to her homegirl's page and watch her story and see what your girl doing all night.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, so like a Fenster account?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, a little finsta account.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. I ain't got one.

[Funny Mike]

You ain't got one?

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, I just put you on.

[Funny Mike]

You gotta get you one. Shannon. I just put you on some game. You gotta get you a finsta. It's worth it. Damn. You wanna know what my name is? What is Mike? Mike. 33. She never knows me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She gonna know if you die, she gonna know. Now, you gotta get. You gotta take. So you.

[Funny Mike]

So.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hold on, hold on, babe. So she like, well, how you know what I had on last night? Don't worry about how I know. My homeboy saw you. But why you. When you go out with your girls, this is the way you dressing, the way you looking. But when you with me, you got on leggings, you got sleeves on. What's really going on?

[Funny Mike]

My girl wearing trench coat in the club with me. When she with me, when she go with her homegirl, she thinks she on the beach, she half naked.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So what you. So what? You have a conversation with her. So what you. When you say, babe, come on now. Yeah, you do it too much.

[Funny Mike]

I don't know. I think women only do that cause they think we insecure about it. You can dress how you want to dress. I don't. Right. If you belong to me, you belong to me, right? You know what I mean? Like, I'm not. Look, I'm not an ugly guy. Like, I believe in what I look like. I ain't the tallest guy, but I believe in what I look like, right? That's the only time I don't want to go out. Like, she can't go out with no NBA players or nothing.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I ain't going for it.

[Funny Mike]

Hell no. Get your ass back. Get back to that house.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So. But here's the thing. She was like, well, when you met me, this is how I dressed. And you ain't have no problem coming up and talking to me. That's a fact. But now, all of a sudden, I dress like this, and it's a problem. Why wasn't it a problem then? But it's a problem now.

[Funny Mike]

Cause I'm in love now. The love is there. Now. It's a whole different situation, right? I'm in love with you now. This belong to me. You know what I mean? Like, I got the pink slip to that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Does she have a problem with the way you go out, how you dress, or when you go out often? I don't know how often you go out with your home, but obviously you're a comedian, so you're on the road an awful lot, you. And I don't know how often she travels with you when you do go out on the road, but does she have a problem with you being out on the road because this is your occupation.

[Funny Mike]

She don't have a problem with me being on the road, but she do got a problem when women come up to me and just start flirting with me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. Like, right in front of her.

[Funny Mike]

Right in front of her. Crazy. We in Chicago. We in Chicago. I'm on we the Ones tour. I was on Mike Epps we the Ones tour. We in Chicago. Four women. Four women. After the show, we at the bar. I'm with Chance the Rapper. You know, I brought Chance the Rapper out, and we went to the bar after that, man, they just walked up and just started flirting heavy. And she said, you ain't gonna introduce me? Boo Boo. She done went to the car, stormed out the club and everything, man, it was crazy. I said, man, y' all gotta get the. Y' all gotta get.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Y' all causing the problem at home.

[Funny Mike]

Y' all gonna have to take me home. How I'm gonna get there?

[Shannon Sharpe]

So why'd you say, hey, okay, they flirting. You know, they flirting. Hey, this is my lady. Such and such.

[Funny Mike]

That was on me. But I just. But I like.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But you was absorbing that. You.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah, a little bit. I can't say that I wasn't. But I'm saying, me being who I am. Yeah, women do it all the time. But this particular time, I should have just said, hey, this is my old lady.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Funny Mike]

But when she went to the car, they said, oh, we know. Damn. Y' all just disrespectful her.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Did you go get. You shoulda go get. Go get her and break her bag.

[Funny Mike]

I tried to. She ain't wanna get out the car. Ask him. She say, I'm not going back in There, I'm ready to go. See, when a woman mad, is she ready to go?

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's over.

[Funny Mike]

It's over with. You can't do nothing with it. It don't matter what you say to her. When she ready to go, she ready to go.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You had a party over, you might as well just go home. Cause you ain't finna have a good time. Cause all you doing is worried about thinking about her, man. You know, a. You know what? Cause you said, if somebody had came up to me and started talking, I would have said, this is my guy. I don't know if she call you haha or Carla. This is my man.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Hey.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey, how you doing, bro? Hey, nice lady, blah, blah, blah. But you ordered. You got four of them talking and you ain't say nothing. You probably had your back turned like.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I did, and it looking crazy. I'm gonna tell her, I go to the car. I said, come on back in, baby. Once you hear us get loud. Yeah, we gonna go back in about two more hours. Let her calm down. We went back in about another hour. It was the same energy you thought. I forgot.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So let me get this straight. I don't know if it is true or not, because there's a grew up in a time where there was traditional.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Her and him. Right. Somewhere along the line, they've allowed the have another.

[Funny Mike]

A her.

[Shannon Sharpe]

A her and a him.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When did that happen, huh?

[Funny Mike]

Well, you said, you said. You said like a throuple.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, yeah. I'm asking. I mean, how. I mean, because I've been trying to figure it out. How you. How you. How you even. How you even broach that subject?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You like, hey, girl, you don't care. You know I love you, but I was just thinking.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, what you thinking?

[Shannon Sharpe]

What you think of Carlos? You know, I was thinking, you know, man, you know I love. Hey, you know, it's always gonna be me and you. Listen, no matter what happens, it's gonna be us.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, but I ain't gonna lie. Me and my girl have indulged in that though.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Y' all haven't.

[Funny Mike]

We have, like, just try to keep me happy. Like, we, We. We've done those swinging. They call it swinging. Yeah, we did a little swinging.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She. Yeah, she agreed to it.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, he did a little swinging. But. Oh, Lord dang is you don't want nobody else doing that to your lady.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That what I'm saying, though. So what did she say with, hey, Carlos?

[Funny Mike]

No. After we got done, she tried to come to get the Hell off of me. I just seen that man put you. I'm talking about, look, he done turned you away but loose. I didn't leper with him, you hear me? Cool. Cause it was like when you like, you wanna have fun, you wanna have fun in your life. That was. You know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

That was a one time thing though, right?

[Funny Mike]

Oh, of course. I would never allow that to happen again. I never let it happen again. Cause you can't get that image out your head.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, that big old. I mean, what if it was somebody like me sweating, smoking just everywhere.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. You see what I'm saying?

[Shannon Sharpe]

In a full plane.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Look, he was doing so good. I said I know she don't want this after that. I know you don't. It ain't no way you want this after what he just did.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But ain't no way. Ha ha. Ain't no way you could be in the same. You gotta be in another room. And just to put it in your mind, well, I know what he's doing, blah, blah, blah. So for and so ain't no way you could watch that. Haha.

[Funny Mike]

That's why, look, I seen her one time. I never seen her.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, come on, man.

[Funny Mike]

Oh man, I don't man, I'm talking about he in there dog walking her in full control of your old lady.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That meant he had to wrap it around his arm to come up out

[Funny Mike]

of there dog walking her. Come on.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ha.

[Funny Mike]

And then they called the police.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What made you.

[Funny Mike]

I thought he was an intruder.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What made. I mean, look, I understand you want to have some fun. Go to the beach or get on a balcony or be in the parking lot at the gym or the grocery store. But come on. Ha ha.

[Funny Mike]

It was, you know, when you living like you want to have fun sometime.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I ain't never wanted to have that kind of fun. I ain't gonna even hold you.

[Funny Mike]

You wanna experience things in your life. You wanna see if you can accept it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, you already.

[Funny Mike]

I still hurt.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Let me ask you this. When you were in high school and you had a girlfriend and you found out that somebody else had slept with her, you know how that felt?

[Funny Mike]

Yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So just. And you didn't see it. Just the fact that you knew somebody had done told you got back to you so you know how you felt. And you mean to tell me you still have and you wanted to watch.

[Funny Mike]

I thought when I became a man I could accept things differently, you know. Listen, I thought when I became a man I could accept things differently. Man, I was curled up in the Bed for three days straight. Three of them.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What did she say? Did she say, ooh, I had me a good time?

[Funny Mike]

She said, she.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause you have to leave after that. She say she had a good time. You got to go.

[Funny Mike]

She said, ma', am, I had a time last night. I said, you said, what? You what? I had me a time last. Well, she on the phone, her homegirl, though she don't know I'm still in the house. Yeah, I had me a time last night. I say, I say, oh, I set this up. I'm the fool. It won't ever happen again.

[Shannon Sharpe]

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[Funny Mike]

Yep, yep, yep, yep. What goes around comes around. I'm. I never let it happen again. Ever.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Boy, I don't know what these guys be looking at. I don't know what.

[Funny Mike]

But it happened. It was an experience, Shannon. You gotta understand. It was like a man. You know what I mean? It was an experience. Like, you know what I'm saying? When you become famous, you get money and stuff like that, you start indulging in different things. And I'm not saying crazy. I ain't famous.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I guess I ain't never been famous.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause that ain't never cross my mind. I ain't been even. Hold you.

[Funny Mike]

Haha. I started indulging in different things. That's what I mean.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay, maybe, you know what? How about I get an alpaca? He would've indulged a different thing. Maybe, you know, maybe get a lion, get a crocodile. Yeah, but to invite somebody else. See you like that. Ha ha.

[Funny Mike]

It was a time. It was a moment. It won't ever happen again. Cause look, I never got over the pain. The pain don't go nowhere.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But why did we.

[Funny Mike]

Ha ha.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Why did you go to another room? Why you got to watch it?

[Funny Mike]

I don't know.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That's what I. You one of them cult guys that like to watch?

[Funny Mike]

Nah, See, see, this is. See, look. Everybody that been drinking, we all in the same house.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay?

[Funny Mike]

You know what I mean? Like I said, I got a joke. I tell on stage, we swing. Well, the first time we ever swung, he swung a little harder than me,

[Shannon Sharpe]

Man. You hit the finger, he don't hit a grand slab.

[Funny Mike]

Listen, you swung a little harder than me. But look.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But do you know the guy?

[Funny Mike]

Huh?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Did you know the guy? Or y' all just somebody?

[Funny Mike]

Nah, nah, nah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Y' all went to one of them clubs, huh?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This was something random. This was random.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, okay.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Cause I. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So where are you on toys? You allow your lady to bring toys in the room?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. You can't be mad about the toys. You gotta quit letting your lady bring them toys in the room. Cause at some point, we not gonna. They not gonna want us no more. They gonna be done with us. Them toys, like, they special.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

Like they take over. And then you ain't. You ain't never had this happen to your head. Shannon. Well, you thought you put it down. You hear? In that bathroom. You hear that?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

You ain't do nothing right. Like, you think you. You think you done put it down, right? And she in the bathroom five minutes later. Y' all finna jump on? I'm about to go take a shower. All you hear is she finishing herself off.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You ain't finishing.

[Funny Mike]

I thought I did. Just ain't do the job right. You ain't do the job right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

It happens. That's why I heard somebody just laugh. Cause she know what's going on. It's a real thing. I'm telling you. God dang, how hot.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I mean, I guess I better knock on wood. That ain't happened to me yet. I might have to get you some of these roast bars.

[Funny Mike]

Look, we. Look, we come in different packages.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I'm gonna have to get you some of these roast bars, man.

[Funny Mike]

It's all good.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But did you ever think, like, when you did that? You think, like, what, does she like him more than me? What if she don't want to be with him anymore? Did she have a conversation like, what if he like her more than me? What if he doesn't want to be? Did that thought ever cross your mind or just because you were drunk? Nothing really crosses your mind.

[Funny Mike]

Nothing crossed your mind when you intoxicated? Everything. Everything kicks in once you start sobering up. Yeah. You know what I mean? When you start. So he'd be like, oh, hold on. This should have never even happened. Why you allow yourself to even put yourself in this position?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Have you ever seen the guy again?

[Funny Mike]

Nope.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You probably said, don't even know what he look like.

[Funny Mike]

Don't care to know what he look like. I just remember what he did.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, you out your damn mind, man. You out your mind.

[Funny Mike]

I'm just being honest, though. I'm being honest.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

I hate to say it, but I

[Funny Mike]

don't trust much of anything.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's the rage bait.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

It feels like it's trying to divide people.

[Shannon Sharpe]

If we got clear facts, maybe we

[Kal Penn]

can calm down a little. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the Facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America.

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[Redfin Advertiser]

about modern home shopping. It's sort of become a fun side hobby, right? Scrolling listings at night, dreaming about kitchens you've never seen or backyards you haven't even stepped foot in. All from the comfort of pretty much anywhere. Redfin knows a lot of people like you want to own but are stuck in this browsing mode loop. That's where Redfin fit flips the script with listings that update within minutes and tours you can book right from the Redfin app, you can see your dream home the moment it appears. Now, liking a listing is easy, but actually landing it, that's where Redfin comes in. Redfin has over 2200 agents with local expertise, and Redfin agents close twice as many deals as other agents. That means they want to help you win, not just window shop. Redfin is built to help you go from just looking to. To wait. This could actually be home. So become the newest neighbor on the block. Visit redfin.com to start finding and start owning. That's redfin.com hey everyone, it's Cal Penn,

[Kal Penn]

host of Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Wil Wheaton, who played Gordie Lachance in stand by me 40 years ago and now narrates Stephen King's the Body, the novella that inspired it all. We talk about what it's like to return to a story that shaped his life, channeling his memories of River Phoenix in the recording booth and why the friendships you have at 12 might be the most important ones you'll ever have. I know Gordie Lachance. I am Gordie Lachance. I mean, even when I was a little kid, I was Gordy Lachance when I didn't know it. Listen to Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So could you date multiple women at once?

[Funny Mike]

I could, but I. I got to a place in my life now, Shannon, to where I just don't even. I rather just have one woman in my life. Yeah, you know, I mean, it's too much to try to keep up with nine or 10 women early, early in my career. That's what I was doing. You know, nine out of ten women trying to keep up with all of them. But but you get expensive and it become a headache. Like, you run out. You run out of things to lie about.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Funny Mike]

You know what I mean? So I'm. I rather just have one woman in my life at this point.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I don't know if you heard this. Victoria Monet said. She admitted that dating women has been worse than dating men. She said, girls do me dirty.

[Funny Mike]

That's crazy.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But they say women, women, as far as marriages, have the highest divorce rate. Women, Women have the highest breakup rate.

[Funny Mike]

Right?

[Shannon Sharpe]

But if y' all can't get along, how y' all expect us to be

[Funny Mike]

able to deal with?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause y' all supposed to know everything. Y' all know how to please them. Y' all know how to make them orgasm. Y' all know what it's like, the gifts they like. Y' all know what they want to eat. Y' all know where they want to go. So y' all know everything. Women supposed to know everything about another woman, right?

[Funny Mike]

Yes. Yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So if y' all can't please each other, how you expect us to do it?

[Funny Mike]

That's what I'm saying. That don't even make sense. Cause y' all know each other's body more than we could ever know it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Funny Mike]

So if y' all can't please each other. We ain't got a chance. We don't got a chance. What we gonna do? Lord, what are we gonna do?

[Shannon Sharpe]

You ever got caught cheating?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You got careless. Your phone ain't it?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, got careless. Left the phone, like, left the phone open. Got drunk. So got. Got drunk one time and gave. Gave her the password to the phone. How you get that drunk? I'm thinking she the Uber driver. She coming to get me out. The Uber? Well, yeah, I got caught cheating a few times.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, my goodness.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. It ain't a good thing, though. Like, bro, I don't even think, like. Like Shannon.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What?

[Funny Mike]

I said, I don't think. I mean, I don't think nobody, like, she just only had one person. I don't think nobody just want to be with just one person like that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's like just so hard to be monogamous.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Like, I don't think that's a real thing. I just think that's. That's a man made.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That's a societal thing.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Like, okay, yeah, come on. At some point you gonna want something else. And no matter how much, no matter how hard you try to just make her only want to be with you or make him only want to be.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

It don't work like that at Some point, you gonna want something else. You don't want it. You want. You want to experience something else at some point. Everybody do. It's a real thing. It's a mental thing, I believe.

[Shannon Sharpe]

How do you fight that temptation? Now, you've been with you how long you been with your girl?

[Funny Mike]

I've been with my girl 10 years.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You might well gonna get married, huh?

[Funny Mike]

That's what I should do, huh? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Y' all already married. I mean, you just don't got the piece of paper.

[Funny Mike]

That what she said the other day too. She said we dead and married. We've been together 10 years. But I don't know. I don't know as a man, I just. I don't know. I just. I ain't figured out how to. You know what I mean, pop that question. You know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

And it ain't.

[Funny Mike]

And then the world still ain't all the way. Right. You still a lot of work. Work to be done with the foundation, you know?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

So once I figure out how to fix the foundation, yeah, we figured out. Probably be 80, 90 years old. We figured out.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I saw this on IG yeah. And it was a guy and this lady. I don't know if they were married or their boyfriend and girlfriend, but they were laying in the bed and it was thundering. She didn't wake up. Dog barking, didn't wake up. Sirens going off. She didn't wake up. Gunshot.

[Funny Mike]

Pow, pow, pow, pow.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She ain't wake up. That notification ding immediately.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the only thing that gets you. I don't go through phones, though.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, you would never go through your girl phone, man.

[Funny Mike]

What they say if you go through the phone, whatever you going looking for, you gonna find it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You went through a girl phone one time?

[Funny Mike]

One time.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, my goodness.

[Funny Mike]

And what I went looking for, I found.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Come on. Oh, come on, man.

[Funny Mike]

Don't listen. Leave them women phones alone. Even if she leave her phone open, she can go out of town for a whole week. That phone will be sitting right there open when she get back.

[Shannon Sharpe]

As a matter of fact, you gonna cut it off. You gonna cut. I want your battery to die, you hear me?

[Funny Mike]

I'm cut the whole phone off, pressing all three buttons.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ha, ha. You went through a phone?

[Funny Mike]

Yes, sir, I did. And you seen everything that you wanna see?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Didn't wanna see.

[Funny Mike]

No. It's hurtful. Cause if you go and look for it, you gonna find it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Huh? Yeah, but like I told you, don't nobody just wanna be one person. They Want experience. That's the real thing.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You hit that thing like dead president. Like o'reill hit that thing on dead present.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah. Look, chest hurting. Talking about some man. Chest hurting, man. I know damn well. Chest hurting.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What's this thing? It's a new craze. I saw this lady, I think it's probably about 11, 12 o' clock at night, and Pizza Hut was calling.

[Funny Mike]

Pizza Hut calling? Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She's like, answer that phone. They ain't gonna answer. Ain't nobody gonna pick up.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

He said, well, I'm gonna sit right here until they do. Cause he don't. I guess he put a lady's name up under a fast food.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Restaurant name. Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Huh? Pizza had clothes at 12. Why people calling me at 3am real talk.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What is it? And you said something. I think you said this, and I firmly believe this.

[Funny Mike]

Yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

A guy might not want. He might have a lady and he might not be interested in her anymore. He don't want her. He want to do his own thing. But the moment another man shows interest,

[Funny Mike]

that's when he won. Yeah, I just shot a skit like that. I just shot a skit like that. That's a real thing. Soon as another man wants your old lady, that's when you want to get on your best behavior.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But you didn't want her.

[Funny Mike]

You told her you thought you was in control, Right? When you ain't in control no more. Men hate when they ain't in control no more. When you lose control of that. Yeah, it's a wrap. Then you doing everything in your power try to get that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You got to get her back.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. But when she gone, she gone. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Once. Once a lady make up her mind

[Funny Mike]

that she dipping, it's over.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She ain't coming back.

[Funny Mike]

And she ain't coming back. You won't get. You will not get her back. When she make up her mind, I don't care. I don't care if you go up there. You can go up there and grab the moon, bring the moon back on your back and give it to her. She don't care. No, you're not getting her back.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, you right about that. Hey, you right about that. Hey, I could attest.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Once a lady get in her head, she says, I'm done.

[Funny Mike]

She's done.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Just go ahead and stop. There ain't a. They ain't. The Hope diamond is not enough.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

There ain't. All the stars in the constellation is not enough.

[Funny Mike]

It's over with.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's over.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. When she move on, it's over with.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I'll give them that. I'll give them that credit. When a woman make up her mind

[Funny Mike]

about something, it don't matter what you do. I don't care how much money you got, how good you look, what car you drive, what house you live in. When she gone, she gone.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When she beat her break, when she reach her breaking point. If you're out here trying to scale a business, you're doing everything yourself. Come on now. That's not how the fast and growing companies operate. The real ones, they delegate smarter. How do you think I grew my podcast? You gotta delegate. See, scaling takes the right expertise at the right time. And that's exactly where upwork comes in. Upwork is your one stop platform to find, hire and pay expert freelancers across everything. Web development, marketing, data, operations, you name it. We're talking accessibility to specialize talent across 125 categories. So instead of spending weeks recruiting and locking yourself into a full time hire you might not even need long term, you can bring in the right expert right now and keep it moving. I love the part. You can browse profiles, check password, even get scoping the roles. So you're not guessing you're hiring with confidence. Now if you're really trying to level up with Business plus, you can access the top 1% of talent on Upwork and an AI powered short listing. You'll get matched with the right freelancers in under six hours. No endless searching required. Plus upwork handles contracts, payments, all the backend stuff so you can stay focused on growing your business instead of getting buried in admin work. Thousands of businesses already on it. The question is, why aren't you? Go ahead and visit Upwork.comShayshay right now to post your job for free. That's Upwork.comShayshAY to connect with the top talent ready to help your business grow. That's upwork.comshayshay. upwork.comshayshay. You okay with your lady having a personal trainer?

[Funny Mike]

No, I don't want my lady having no personal trainer.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Well damn, you had one to get that weight up off you.

[Funny Mike]

No, I did that on my own.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You did that by yourself?

[Funny Mike]

I was a personal trainer.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, no, I don't wanna have no personal train that be the guy that always make his way on in. You know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

He be talking. He pretend like he tried to work on a farm. He from behind. He tried to work on a farm and he rub it up against him.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, for sure. Yeah. While I'M out, coming to the gym and you got my lady over in a three point stance. Like, come on now, what workout is that? Tell me what workout that is.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey, you see this thing on IG where the women going to Jamaica and the guys, they got. Yeah, they got them. They getting mud. What is that? Huh?

[Funny Mike]

No, I don't know. They putting them in the mud.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Funny Mike]

No, that. I'm straight on that. I'm straight on that. I'm good. Because, like, what is that? Like, that ain't. Like, if you need a shower, go take you one.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. I mean, he all up between the five and all. Come on now. They do it too much. I don't know who came up with,

[Funny Mike]

I'll be in a Jamaican jail. I'm straight, I'm cool.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What's the best way to resolve a disagreement with your girl?

[Funny Mike]

It get hard sometimes because, you know when you feel like you writing that she thinks she right. Like, sometimes women like. Like I said, like, even when she move, like you said, when she make her mind up, she make her mind up. No matter if you write or not, she still. This is still what she believes. But for me, shit, just to go out there, I could play my game, get the hell on. See, I go outside my little pool house, you won't see me for a day or two, right? But that third day, we start missing each other. Sometimes you gotta walk away. You gotta walk away.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But the question is, what are you arguing about? Let me ask you this, because are you arguing for right or you arguing to be right?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, sometimes. Most times arguing to be right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That's a fact.

[Funny Mike]

That's a fact. Arguing to be right. Absolutely. Absolutely. That's a fact.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. I never thought about it like that, but yeah. Arguing to be right. Yeah. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause that's what my therapist told me that. She told me. She was like, Mr. Sharp, I don't wanna ask you a question.

[Funny Mike]

I just got in therapy, too, and

[Shannon Sharpe]

she said, when you guys have a disagreement, are you arguing for right or you arguing to be right?

[Funny Mike]

Gotta think about it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But now I go the whole opposite way.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Even if I'm right, you right. Just. No, no. You just said that to shut me up, right?

[Funny Mike]

I am.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I didn't say that. But yeah, my mind.

[Funny Mike]

That's what I'm doing, though.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Funny Mike]

Yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When I'm wrong, you're right. I was wrong. I shouldn't have done this. I should have said that. I apologize.

[Funny Mike]

I can't wait.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You just saying that cause you want me to shut up. I can't wait in my mind. Yeah, I am.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So now, I mean. I mean, I'm trying to figure out, so how do I win now? Because if I don't want to have an argument with you, right, I just want to just go ahead and move on. So I want to continue watching the game or I want to continue doing what I'm doing?

[Funny Mike]

Like, just, like, go on, just get out of my face.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes, you were right. You were right.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, you got it. They hate that too, though. You got it. Yeah, you got it, man. He ain't finna argue or nothing. He just.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I can't even have no conversation. Well, this is not a conversation. You yelling and screaming. That ain't a conversation. Yeah, so I just like, hey, I'm gonna let you have it.

[Funny Mike]

No, that's what we. I ain't gonna lie. Snoop Dogg was the one that taught me patience. Like, I just. You know what I'm saying? Just be calm and collective. He was the first man I met that just taught me how to be patient.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, he taught me patience.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Well, I might need some of that. Snoop. Where the Snoop got there?

[Funny Mike]

Nah, for sure. Snoop, one of the most patient people I ever met in my life. One of the most calm individuals that you're gonna meet. He ain't gonna get loud with you. He ain't doing all that. Yeah, Calm, cool, collective guy. He's the first person I met like that. But he taught me patience, though.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay, Devin, on the first date, you go on the first date, y' all decide y' all going somewhere. And then she ordered a lobster tower. You know, it got lobster, it got crab leg, it got shrimp, it got scallops out of that thing. That thing about this high.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I gotta use the bathroom.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You gonna dip on high?

[Funny Mike]

Outta here. 2, 300, 2, 4, 5, 6, $700 for some lobster and some crab. Yeah, baby, I gotta go use the bathroom, and I'm not coming back.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, my God. You ain't gonna do it like that. Ha ha.

[Funny Mike]

Listen, listen. Women get expensive. Like, my girl, she expensive, though. Like, she cost me a lot of money, millions of dollars. I spent a lot of money. But 10.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You got 10 years. You got 10 years on it.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, so I spent. But I spent a lot of money over. Like, when you go back and you realize how much money you really spent.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

You be like, damn, what's this? You know, I probably spent about five or six million dollars for real. Damn, real money.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Well, you might.

[Funny Mike]

Because she was like. She was from out here. She's from Cali. You know, I'm from Detroit.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay.

[Funny Mike]

So I was flying her out every week. Every other week, back and forth to Detroit.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So you just said, baby, you gotta come on move out here?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, come on down here and come go with me. Me and my manager, we went to go do the books. I said, Damn, 700,000 just on flights. What are we doing? It's expensive. It's expensive.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Where are you on if whether or not she eats all the food? Cause, you know, they got them some that just pick over the food. I just want a salad. I ain't that much. And then they just pick over it. And you got some that, hey, they order, they go eat it.

[Funny Mike]

Where's this? Go get that to go. Box. You taking this with you for sure. You gotta take this with you. And you gonna eat it for the next two days too. You about to eat this all week until it's gone for real.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ooh, this is a good one. Gifts.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You take a gift back from a young lady?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I would.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You take it back.

[Funny Mike]

Like, if I'm not. If I'm with you and I'm not. You know what I mean? Then we fall out, and I spent a nice little amount of change on it. Yeah, I want it back. I want it back.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, no, no. You can't do that.

[Funny Mike]

I need it back. Cause I gotta give it to the next one.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, no, no, no. Now, if y' all together, you buy her a gift, y' all break up, that's hers. If I'm in the process, I've bought the gift, we start arguing. Oh, you not getting that.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I'm taking it back. I'm taking it back. I'm taking it back.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You buy somebody. Let's just say, for the sake of art, you buy somebody an lv. You buy Deor or Hermes bag or something, you gonna take the bag back. You take a piece of jewelry, you taking it back home.

[Funny Mike]

I'm taking everything that I came here with.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But you gave it to her as a gift.

[Funny Mike]

It was a gift. But I need it for the next one. Ha ha. I need it for the next one. I'm not leaving you with nothing. You don't get to just walk out my life. It ha.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You gonna give her the stuff that she bought you back?

[Funny Mike]

Huh?

[Shannon Sharpe]

You gonna give her the stuff that she bought you back?

[Funny Mike]

Say what? I'm keeping all the stuff that she brought me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, man. No, no, no, no. You can't do that.

[Funny Mike]

Cause I'm heartbroken. You know, that's what men do when they like, we get petty, we get petty. When one woman walk out your life, you start getting petty. Give me anything back. You get petty, we get petty.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Nah, I've never asked for anything back.

[Funny Mike]

You never asked for nothing back. So if you do it, it's theirs.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Once I give it to you, it's yours. No matter what the cost is, it's yours. Now, like I said, I'm in the process. I go buy it and I want to give it to you, and you start arguing or we disagree. Oh, my sister got plenty of LB and Dior and Chanel bags. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I got stuff right in my closet right now.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. Wow.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey, you can't get that.

[Funny Mike]

You can't get that. No, no, no, that's game. That's game. Just put me on something.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Drew Ski skit. Drew Ski say he spent $100,000 on the church skit, but he didn't make any money from it. But I think the attention that it brought.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I commented on that. Y' all seen that? Yeah, yeah. Drew Ski, he out here. He doing it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

He on another level.

[Funny Mike]

He on another level. You gotta respect it. We gotta respect it. Cause when I first started, the 10 year run that I was on was crazy. Yeah, but what he doing now? $100,000 for a skit? Way over there. Way over there.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey, you say I got about $150, $200 on the skit. What? A thousand?

[Funny Mike]

I got my phone Biscuit free. Better go outside and film what's on my mind.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You ain't got no setup like Biscuit?

[Funny Mike]

I ain't got all that. I'm about to go film what's on my mind. $100,000 for a skit? Ooh, you a different breed, big bro. Yeah, you gotta appreciate it, though.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I got real love.

[Funny Mike]

I got, like. I got love for, like. He making it hard for any other guys to come off the Internet. Yeah, it's gonna, like, it's gonna be hard to come off the Internet now for what he doing, you know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Because that's what people gonna expect. That's what.

[Funny Mike]

That's what they gonna expect. Like, I'm looking at my number. I said, damn, my number's down a little bit. Cause of what he's shooting and what he doing to film this stuff, you know what I mean? He taking it to another level. You gonna have to look. Gonna have to look.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You do a collab, would you do something with Drew Ski?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I'll do Something with Drew Ski. Yeah, I appreciate what Drew said about me saying, like, if it wasn't for the Howard Davidson of the world, it wouldn't be no Drew Ski. So I appreciate him saying that about him. But yeah, I definitely a collab with Drew Ski. You know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

So was that your foray? Did you always want to be a comedian? Was that your foray into it, like doing the skits and then make the transition and go into stand up?

[Funny Mike]

No, I was. I was just in. I was in high school, and right after high school, my homies just always told me that was funny. I was. I was a class clown, right? You know, I got kicked out in 8th grade, my 10th grade year, my 12th grade year.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I never went to prom, never been to prom, never did nothing. I graduated from alternative school. Cause I was just a fool, you know what I mean? I ain't had nobody to tell me, hey, man, get yourself together, right? Can we cuss on here?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Sure, ma'. Am.

[Funny Mike]

You know, my granddad used to say what he said, man, you just young, dumb and full of cum. Favorite line. Yeah, I ain't know what that meant until I started getting a little older. Like, man, yeah, you, you. You stupid. Yeah, gotta get yourself together. You know what I mean? But the older I got, I started realizing like, bro, it ain't even no reason to even be doing this. You ain't about to get paid for it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Correct.

[Funny Mike]

You know what I mean? And my man's like, bro, you brought. Get on YouTube and start putting out this one. Vine was still going on.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay?

[Funny Mike]

That's why I talk fast now. Cause vine was six seconds.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Funny Mike]

So six second vine. You had to be funny immediately. You had to get right to it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Funny Mike]

So that's why I talk fast to this day. So I started on vine and people started picking up on it. I'm like, damn. Maybe I am kind of funny for real. And then a fan base start coming.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, real thing.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So when you were in school, it wasn't like you couldn't do the work. It was like, I just wanna be funny. This is. People find this funny. People like me, they gonna gravitate towards me. Chicks like me. Chicks like guys that are funny.

[Funny Mike]

They do, they do. They do.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Women like men that are funny.

[Funny Mike]

That was my claim to fame. Just going to school every day to be a class clown. I knew today I'm not going to do no work tomorrow. Class clown is the job, right? That was the job. I'm just being honest. That was the job.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You Ain't get a whole lot out of school.

[Funny Mike]

No, school got a whole lot out of me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What do you think about when Fat Boy sse said he's the reason that there's a Drew Ski? I'm Michael Jackson, I'm a CEO, and I'm not putting on no dress. I mean, some felt like he took a shot at Drewski.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I mean, you know, he can feel that way, you know, but how Davis the one who paid the way for everybody, right. To just being honest? Yeah, I was the one that held it down for 10 years. 10 years, right. You go do the math. The guard, the big fellas, the finna be a breeze. Beyond me's.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

The double words.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

How Davis held it down for 10 years. I got love for Fat Boy too though, but nah. Yeah, we held it down.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But you worked with him before, right?

[Funny Mike]

That's my dog. Yeah, that's my dog. I don't think that he was taking a shot at him, you know what I mean? He was around like Fat Boy was around when I first started too, right. He was, he was like. I was like this 2015 time though, right? You know what I mean? It's 2026, it's been a minute, it's 11 years later, I'm still relevant.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So give me a Mount Rushmore social media comedian.

[Funny Mike]

Mount Rushmore social media comedians. You gotta go DC Young. Fly. DC on fly. Yep. Desi Banks.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yep.

[Funny Mike]

Drew Ski.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yep.

[Funny Mike]

Obviously. Obviously me. And if I had one more, who would I say? Damn.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Country Wayne.

[Funny Mike]

Country Wayne. But Country Wayne don't be on the Internet no more. Like Country Wayne, he in a whole different stratosphere. He allowing everybody else to eat in the moment now. So if we just talking about Mount Rushmore, what was done for the Internet, that would be. That would be the four Drewski, dc, me and Desi Payne.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You ever had somebody steal your skits?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I done stole some skits. Everybody stole a skit or two. I ain't gonna lie to you. You know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

You know that. You know, in comedy, man, you can't be stealing nobody. But tell you though, uh huh.

[Funny Mike]

Listen, if they don't know you exist, this mine. I mean, 98.9% of the stuff that I came up with was all on me. But I mean, I might have seen something like, oh no, I'm probably gonna recreate that. Just me. Right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And do it a different way. Because I think the thing is everybody did it.

[Funny Mike]

If they tell you they didn't do it, they lying to you.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You Know what? I've had a lot of comedians on here, haha. And it says, look, you might. But you gotta understand, a lot of our minds are wired the same.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, for sure. So, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And so, you know, you looking at it with stealing, but just because I said it, that don't mean I heard you say it, right?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, but sometimes I got that. The other day somebody said that to me, like, man, you took that. I said, bro, I don't even know who you are, sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

And people, you know what I mean? The one I shot the other day about got. Guys get drunk and be like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Somebody said, yeah, you just run off my. I said, bro, I don't even know who you is. This is like. You say our mind just ride the same. I literally thought about.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Funny Mike]

And like, this is funny to me. Like, you think somebody. Bro, I don't even know who you is, bro.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So. So is it out. So would you. So if. Can I go somewhere and watch it? Is it on YouTube? Is it on snack. So where can I go watch. You said it's yours, so where can I go watch your version of it?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So if your version is in your mind and mine is on YouTube. I didn't steal yours.

[Funny Mike]

I didn't steal yours at all. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause where would I get it from?

[Funny Mike]

People be cloud chasing, though. They do. People be cloud chasing. I mean, they know how I davis the name, the entity, who I am. They wanted your. Oh, yeah. You stole that from me, bro. I never seen you before, bro. I just woke up today and thought this was sweet, right. I didn't even know you existed on this earth.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Being honest, what's your top five saying

[Funny Mike]

that I came up with?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yep.

[Funny Mike]

Beyond me, big fella. This finna be a breeze.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yup. Guard.

[Funny Mike]

And I ain't never ever seen you act like this.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, time to regroup. You gotta regroup.

[Funny Mike]

I got so many. I got so many. I came up with like 40 or 50 catchphrases that. You know what I mean?

[Shannon Sharpe]

And they catch on.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Because a lot of times things catch on because people like, I can see like, hey, bro, we gotta regroup.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, let's regroup. Yeah, yeah, come on, let's regroup. Let's get it together.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But like the jail scene, I mean, that's like. That's kind of like what I really like. I'm like, bro. And I'm crying because, you know, hey. And the guy in the background, hey, you did that crime. Now you gotta do this time.

[Funny Mike]

Come on, get your ass behind. I'M getting there behind. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. God.

[Funny Mike]

Classic. Classic. You know what I mean? They waited for me to get out of jail, though. It's been 10 years.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So when you shot that, you say, man, hey, I ain't spending that kind of money. I got my phone. I'm going somewhere.

[Funny Mike]

Hey, to each his own.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I'm knocking this out.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. To each his own. I did all that in my mom's basement. I found the white wall in my mom's basement, and I shot all them girls, kids. And they went viral the way they did that was in the basement.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow.

[Funny Mike]

I mean, if you see beyond the wall, it's stuff everywhere. I just cleared out me a little spot. Yeah. And I shot all them videos on that white wall for the last 10 years. Yeah. Guard.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And you just. So how did you come up with that? You just sitting around one day and said, you know what?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah,

[Shannon Sharpe]

I think I got an idea. I think this will work.

[Funny Mike]

It was random. It was random. I just went downstairs one day and I'm like, I want to shoot a scene in jail. I didn't even know the guard was going to catch on the way it caught on, though. And I got finna be a breeze out of that, too. First time in jail. This finna be a breeze. Yes. I got guard and finna be a breeze in one skit. I got two slogans in one skit.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

And I didn't know it was going to catch on like that. And once it caught on, you know, once something catch on, what we gonna stop doing it for?

[Shannon Sharpe]

You gotta keep going. We gotta go back to it.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And then people see you, and that's what they say.

[Funny Mike]

Guard. I'll be anywhere. Random people be in a movie theater. I'm down here with my kids. The other day, we watched the Mario movie. All I hear somebody, guard.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Bro.

[Funny Mike]

If you don't sit down and watch the movie, bro. Get to that when we leave. But I mean, I appreciate.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I appreciate the love.

[Funny Mike]

I appreciate the love.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Of course.

[Funny Mike]

Appreciate the love. You appreciate the love for sure.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You said Snoop was the first celebrity to put you on because he does a lot of reposts of your stuff.

[Funny Mike]

I love Snoop.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I mean, he. I mean, like, love Snoop. If you come out with a. You best believe if you put a skit out, Snoop Dogg gonna clip it and go put it back up on his page.

[Funny Mike]

Yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Snoop shows nuts. Like I said, I ain't got nothing but love for Snoop. Cause he unbelievable, guy. He unbelievable. Unbelievable. You couldn't imagine, but he's Just a great guy.

[Funny Mike]

I've always told people there's no man on earth I respect more than Snoop Dogg for what he did for me. Snoop Dogg came all the way to Detroit, came up there, had a show that night. And he got to Detroit about 10 o'. Clock. And everybody calling my phone. I'm not answering the phone for him, I'm not answering the phone for him. I'm still dead asleep. Everybody calling me, right? He like, haha, what you doing? He says, uncle Snoop, what you doing? Get up, I'm on my way to the D. Came to the D, he got a chinchilla on. Yeah, he pull up, I'm not thinking. He really about to come to eight Mile and Grass. Shit. He come to the hood. Snoop come to the hood. Kicking with me for eight, nine hours.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow.

[Funny Mike]

I get in the car with Snoop, we riding around, he got his security over there. He said, you need me to ride around? He said, no, I'm good, cuz I'm good. And rolled around with us for eight, nine hours until he had to go do his show.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Changed my life without Snoop Dogg. It ain't no hard days.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What's some of the best advice he gave you?

[Funny Mike]

Be patient. Be patient. Don't try to run the Hollywood too too fast. They ain't doing nothing but serving our humble pie. I'll never forget when he told me that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. He said, he said, hollywood gonna serve you some humble pie. And I ain't know what that meant. Cause I didn't wrote 8, 9 show. We got 89 IPs. Trying to get them off the ground, man, listen, you walking Netflix and telling me I got 6 million followers. So they don't care about none of that, right? You gonna get some of that humble paddock serving out here, right? I've been getting it for eight, nine years.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But it's gonna come.

[Funny Mike]

It's gonna come. Yeah, yeah, we gonna get it figured out. I'm only 33 years old, still in my prime. We gonna get right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Because he told you to say 4 million followers. And that doesn't mean $4 million.

[Funny Mike]

Yes, 4 million followers gonna be $4 million.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Because a lot of times people equate. Well, he got this many followers, X,

[Funny Mike]

Y and Z. Yeah, I ain't make a real dollar until I had 6.5 million, I believe. Or maybe 6 million. That's when I really started making money. But you have value. Like you famous and broke. I was famous and broke. Living out my mama's basement. Still wasn't making no money down There really no money. None.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So was it frustrating because you. Excuse me, you working so hard, you're putting all your blood, sweat and tears into it, and it seems like it's all for not. And then you hear a lot of stories like, hey, it just. I go year after year after year, and then one day. Yeah, one day it happened.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, one day it just happened. But it is frustrating. We got 5 million people around this world that love you and you ain't got no money. Like, damn, bro. Hey, you. Hot day.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

You wanna buy me a cheeseburger?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. For real? Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

Like, it took a long time to make money off, like, off the Internet. Like I told you that, man. Making it hard for people to come off that Internet. Now we try to go get some jobs.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

I'm telling you because.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And I think. But some of the old guard was resentful because they had to go a different route. They didn't have the access to the Internet like a lot of these young comedians have.

[Funny Mike]

Now OG don't. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So they had to go on the chitlin circuit and they had to go this and this and this. And you had to build brick by brick. It was years. It was five, 10 years. Now a guy can come out on IG Twitter and it's instantaneous.

[Funny Mike]

Yep. Facts. That's why a lot of OGs don't like. They don't like guys who come from there. Cause of the work they had to put in. Like, I got my og, my og, who taught me how to do stand up. He like, man, you gotta understand. We was out here doing standup for 10 piece. All flats.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Funny Mike]

And some fries. Y' all just jumped on the Internet and now y' all famous and rich and I get it. That's why I take the standup side of it so seriously. You know what I mean? That's why a lot of shows and stuff like that was missed. Cause I respect the game so much. You know what I mean? It wasn't that I didn't want to do the shows. I just knew that. Hey, look, hold on. I'm not ready.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

But I should have never even took the shows. If you knew you weren't gonna pull up and make sure you took in that business.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

You know what I mean? Cause I don't want to disrespect that stage. That stage means something to me. That's why I might. If I don't feel like I'm up to it. Nah, bro. Gonna cancel that show.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But, you know, it's different. Haha. If you think about it, it's different in every aspect. You look at football players, look at what they make compared to what the guys in the past make. Look at baseball, look at basketball, look at actors and actresses. It's a different time now. I can't be resentful.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I mean, I remember I was like, mom. Cause my mom had her last kid at 24 years old. I said, mom, you couldn't wait till you like 30, 35. Your baby couldn't be getting somebody's bread.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But it is what it is because guys, guess what? Guys before them said, hey, I was working for 10 piece in a flat. We was working for two piece and we had to clean up.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So it's just a different time.

[Funny Mike]

Different time.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But you can't be resentful of the time. Just like, you know what? I'm in a time now, if I'm as funny as I think I am, people will find me.

[Funny Mike]

But on top of that, people don't understand, like, even with the standup, like, it's not easy to be making skits. That ain't easy.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No.

[Funny Mike]

Cause a lot of the OGs, I done seen some of the OGs try to get on there and do it. They can't do it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

They can't do it.

[Funny Mike]

Like. Like, that's. That's a world too.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It is.

[Funny Mike]

Like, y' all gotta allow us to, you know, I mean. I mean, show us some love. Cause it's hard to get famous. And everybody wasn't able to do it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

You know, there's only a select few of us that was able to. To build a fan base up off the Internet and pick up a phone for free, download the app for free, and then get on there and build over 20 million people to love you.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right. You know, and it's like, with anything, just because you're great at something, that don't mean you gonna be famous. There are a lot of great basketball players that are not as famous. There are a lot of great football players. That'll mean. And just because you, like, you might be funny, but everybody. I mean, some of the funniest comedians might be the least well known.

[Funny Mike]

That's a fact. That's a fact. Yeah. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It just happens.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But I can't be resentful of a football player that came up in today's time. And I'm mad because I didn't make the money that they're making right now. He ain't got nothing to do with that.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, that's like you waking up tomorrow hating Travis Kelsey.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Like, yeah, he just happened to play the position that I played. He ain't doing. He didn't change the landscape.

[Funny Mike]

Absolutely.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Television came along, streaming services came along, sponsors, advertisers, all that came along and it exploded. And he happened to be in these guys in today's time, they happen to be the beneficiaries of it. But I don't look at it, and I wish other people would look at it that way, but I don't think that it's hard because they see the kind of money that you guys are making with kids and things like that.

[Funny Mike]

We was able to download, like I said, download a free app and make millions of dollars off a free app. And I get where the OG's coming from. You know what I mean? Like, they had to get up there and really put the work in. But we put the work in too.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, it's just a different, in a different form. I had Country Wayne on. Country Wayne said, man, I was making a mistake, you know, Facebook. Country Wayne was out there way, way back when. And I remember him telling me like, man, yeah man, I made X amount. I say, for real, Wayne? Yeah. What he said he made what he said he made like, yeah, like 7 million in like two years.

[Funny Mike]

Damn. Shit. I need to get on Facebook a little more.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But here's the thing, what happened, haha, is that they found everybody was making money, huh?

[Funny Mike]

20 million.

[Shannon Sharpe]

He made 20 million.

[Funny Mike]

He said he made 20 million on Facebook. Off of Facebook. And YouTube.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And Facebook. In three years. In three years, right.

[Funny Mike]

That's news to me. As soon as I leave out of here, get my ass on Facebook immediately.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But you know, but the problem is, is that was in the beginning stages and so they was paying an absorbent amount of money to keep you from making the money. Guess what? Now they keep shrinking it. It used to be 10, $12,000 per million views. Then it comes down to 7, 8 per million views now. They already got it down to like one to $2,000 per million.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, man, I just did. I was on YouTube. I did. I did 20 million views last month. Yeah, I made 400 bucks. I made 400 bucks. And I'm not doing like long form content on YouTube. It's more short forms.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Shorts.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, I'm doing the shorts. Yeah, man, I did 20 million views on YouTube last month. I went and checked it. That motherfucker said $438.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You gotta get to that long form.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, which one? Go buy a bottle. Can't pay no bills with that. Keep going.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey, you got. Hey, you got. You gonna have to do at least eight minutes.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, that's what it is. It's the long. It's the longer. It's the longer form content.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause it's. Cause it's short. How do I put AD in there?

[Funny Mike]

Right? Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause by the time. By the time I try to put that. It's over.

[Funny Mike]

You do like this. It's over with.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

You already watched the whole. Yeah, I'm doing 30 seconds, but. Yeah, I gotta.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I gotta. No, no, no, no, no. You're doing shorts. Yeah. You gotta do long form.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. See?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Help me out, son.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When you make it, like, suit your boy or something.

[Funny Mike]

No, no, no. Look, I'm gonna ask you for something.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

I hate to say it, but I

[Funny Mike]

don't trust much of anything.

[Shannon Sharpe]

It's the rage bait.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

It feels like it's trying to divide people.

[Shannon Sharpe]

If we got clear facts, maybe we

[Kal Penn]

could calm down a little bit. NBC News brings you clear reporting. Let's meet at the facts. Let's move forward from there. NBC News reporting for America.

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[Kal Penn]

hey, everyone, it's Cal Penn, host of Irsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I'm sitting down with Divergent author Veronica Roth to talk about her sprawling new novel, Seek the Traitor's Son. It's a sci fi fantasy epic about two protagonists on opposite sides of a war and a prophecy neither of them wanted.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

My first book was Divergent, and when

[Funny Mike]

that came out, like, because it was so popular, I think it attracted, like,

[Narrator/Advertiser]

mostly positivity, but the negativity I sucked

[Funny Mike]

in like a sponge.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

And I think it was, like, critiques

[Funny Mike]

of things I liked when I was like, you know, I was 23 and I wrote this book and it had all my, like, dorky little cheesy or

[Narrator/Advertiser]

maybe unrealistic loves in it.

[Funny Mike]

And I started to feel a lot

[Narrator/Advertiser]

of shame about those things.

[Funny Mike]

And so for the rest of my

[Narrator/Advertiser]

career, I steered away from those little things that, like, make you feel pleasure when you read.

[Funny Mike]

But I also was, like, saying no

[Narrator/Advertiser]

to these parts of myself that I then was like, screw it.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, so that's this book.

[Kal Penn]

Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So what have you learned about social media?

[Funny Mike]

It's fickle. It's fickle. It's always changing. It's always evolving.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Algorithm's changing.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. One day they love you the most, the next day they telling you to wrap it up. I said, damn, I've been around a long time. See, one thing about that Twitter.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, man, that street Twitter, the street

[Funny Mike]

committee, man, they will destroy you on that app. Yeah, baby, they had you second guessing yourself. Yeah, they done told me two or three times, Tyler rapping. I say, damn, what the hell? I get old to the people you Know what I'm saying?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

I don't even get on Twitter no more.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You love with Twitter.

[Funny Mike]

Fucking happy. That's all y'. All, the black. Look, look, the. The council culture on there. They get at your body. I went back and forth with somebody not too long ago. I told them, shut up. I got money. You know what I mean? And they tried to tear me a new asshole for talking to that man like that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But see, the problem that I have. Let me tell you what I have, because they say you're not above anybody. You just like us. Okay, I get it when you say something reckless to me, and I come back, now, you the victim.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, that's fine.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I didn't jump. I don't follow you. I didn't jump on your timeline. I'm not on your feed. You said something reckless. I checked you. And now. Do your employer know you talk like this?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Did your employer know you talk like that?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But that's what I don't get. You can't get on there, try to offend someone, and when they shoot back, now all of a sudden you the victim.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And that's what they do.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. I posted a skit, and, you know, I had a little bit of this oil in me. Had a little bit of oil in me, man. I get back on there and respond to him. We go back and forth, woot, woot. Oh, hi, Davis. He arrogant. He this, that. And the third, how you. He just get to talk to me any type of way. I ain't supposed to say nothing. Nobody know.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Just.

[Funny Mike]

It's crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy. Then they tell you, well, you were never funny. No way, man. I'm about to come pull up on you. You lying to me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You lying to me, Daddy, get personal. Try to hit with her.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, you want to hit with her? Yeah, I'm about to come pull up on you. Yeah. Get all that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hello. You took the dinner with jay Z over 500k. You would. That's what you would do.

[Funny Mike]

I took the dinner with Jay Z. I took the lunch with Jay Z. I didn't know Nothing about the 500k at the time. That's where it came from.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I sure hope you got some valuable, some valuable. Some valuable nuggets out of that.

[Funny Mike]

No, I mean, I got a lot of game out of Jay Z. When I. When I first sat down with Jay Z, what he told me was, he said, man, he said, bro, he said, you coming up with all these slogans. He said, labels pay millions of dollars to get slogans like this, you're doing it off the cuff. He like, how you doing? I'm like, man. He just. This was in my mind, and this is what I think is funny. And I put it out there. And what was crazy, when I first said, I'm Jay Z said, bro, I thought you was gone. I said, what you mean you thought I was gone? He said, I thought I wouldn't be able to get in touch with you. I said, you Jay Z thought you wouldn't be able to get in touch with me? The little homie from Seven Island Moraine, from the east side of Detroit. It blew my mind when he told me that. That was crazy. That was crazy.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So he was. He said, all these slogans, you need to copyright them, you need to trademark them, you need to patent them. And therefore, when somebody use them, they. You know, they have to compensate.

[Funny Mike]

You see, the only thing. See, that's what happened with Derrick Henry. I couldn't. I couldn't patent a double word. But when you seen the Old Spice commercial, when they was done. Oh, you tripping. Tripping. Like when they were doing a double word. Yeah, that's when I posted it on my page. Like, come on, y' all can't just run off with the sauce.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

And Derrick Henry hit me and said, I'm not working with Old Spice no more until they pay. They made them people pay me. Damn. That was the realest thing that I can say. Derrick Henry did. Always appreciate him for that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So Derek Henry made him cut a check, huh?

[Funny Mike]

Made him cut. He said. He said today. He said, till y' all pay high, Davies, I'm not working with y' all no more. Made him. People pay.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Nice little. Nice little chunk of change.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Nice little chest dinner.

[Funny Mike]

Nice little chunk of change, too. I ain't gonna lie. It was up there in the six figures.

[Shannon Sharpe]

What?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, it was a nice little chunk of change.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You shoot King Henry little something?

[Funny Mike]

I mean, he. I mean, he ain't ask for nothing. Y' all hear that? I told him I appreciate it. Appreciate you, big bro. Appreciate it, big fella. But they do.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause if you think about it, Patrick Mahomes. Yeah, I called him Mahomeboy. Yeah, they called him Mahomy.

[Funny Mike]

Wow.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ain't nobody ever quarterbacks didn't get no nick. They get no nickname like that. They don't even think about no Mahomes. That's. That's the lingo we talk. That's crazy amongst us.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I see it. But I tell you what. Lou. The thing is, Lou Williams. I gave Lou Williams the name Lemon Pepper Lou.

[Funny Mike]

For real.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I did.

[Funny Mike]

Why? Nobody don't talk about that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

He told a story, okay? Cause he got, you know, during the pandemic, they supposed to be in the bubble, and he goes to Magic City, and he says he orders the wings, and, you know, it just living. Pepper Lou, loose age.

[Funny Mike]

That's dope.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Next day, he.

[Funny Mike]

You gotta give us the name. We need a nickname for K. Cunningham. Cause my pistons, they on the way.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ooh, he doing it, he doing it, he doing it.

[Funny Mike]

They play tonight, don't they?

[Shannon Sharpe]

They do.

[Funny Mike]

Oh, yeah. Let me get to a TV soon. I can't wait. Look, we can work through them, boys.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Y' all gonna get them tonight.

[Funny Mike]

We gonna get them.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay. I sure hope so.

[Funny Mike]

Pull that belt out.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So did Jay Z come to your priority? You went to him or he came to you?

[Funny Mike]

Jay Z? Matter of fact, I met Jay Z in the same city we in right now.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, did you?

[Funny Mike]

Yep. We was at the. We was at the Beverly Hills Hotel, and I'm like. I'm thinking I'm there before Jay Z. Yeah. I'm like, yeah, we here to meet, meet, meet. They called him. They called him by his real name, Sean Carter. They called him Shawn Carter. Yeah. They said, who you here to meet? I say Jay Z. You mean Shawn Carter. He was already back there, man. Came through the back door of the Beverly Hill Hotel.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

I'm talking about. Jay Z ain't had no phone, no watch, and for some reason, he knew when he had been sitting down with me for an hour, he literally sat with me for 60 minutes on the dot and said, I gotta go, man. Looked at his wrist. I ain't had no watch on.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Promise? Promise. You looked at his wrist? Ain't had no watch on. Jay Z had on. He had on. He had on a white T shirt. This one, I knew Jay Z had real money.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

Because when he sat on, the shirt, didn't wrinkle.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

What type of T shirt is that? What type of T shirt is that? What type of T shirt you got on, Jay? Shirt ain't wrinkle or nothing. Sat down with me for an hour, literally 60 minutes, and say, hey, hey, how I got to get out of here? Like, bro, how you know what time it is? I don't know if somebody was signaling them from the corner or something. Like, even when Jay. When he first started looking for me, he had. Somebody hit me up, and they was like, yeah, Jay Z gonna be calling you from a Random number. Just answer the phone. I done talked to 40 bill collectors. Ain't none of these numbers there. None of them. He finally called me. It was All Star Weekend. I'll never forget when Jay finally called me. Said, hey, say what's up? You know who this is? I say, I say, I say, I'll tell my manager. I said, oh, that's Jay. This Jay? This Jay? Yeah, man. I love what you out here doing for the people. We talked for, like, 10, 15 minutes. And then a week later, that's when I met him out here at the bedroom.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, it was dope. It was dope. I ain't talked to him since Jay hit me up. I want to have another. Need to hold something.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You met Will Smith also, right?

[Funny Mike]

Yep. Will, too. Yep. Well, Will flew me to Atlanta for. It was his 50th birthday party.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay.

[Funny Mike]

And it was like. It was Will Smith 50th bucket list. And I. I shot a skit. He didn't even know I was shooting a skit. Like, I just. Thoughts meeting Will Smith. He's just standing over this first time that I'm getting introduced to Will Smith. So people, like, just go on and record you. And the skit came out crazy. And he didn't even know I was shooting the skit in the moment. He flew me to Atlanta. We drove Porsches and all type of. Type of stuff. Like, it was crazy. I ain't had no license, so I was the only one that didn't get to drive no Porsche.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

But I was looking at them through the window. Yeah, they was driving Porsches outside. They made me stay inside. They said, you ain't got no license. I said, no. So it was dope to like to meet Will the way I did. Cause we shot the skit. We shot the skit within, meeting him at the same time. That's what made it so dope. Like, I shot the skit and met Will Smith at the same time. You can't beat that type of stuff.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You have a conversation, you sit down, and you partake. Any wisdom?

[Funny Mike]

Yep, yep, yep. I mean, Will told me. Was it the second time or the first time I met Will? Cause it's the second time I met Will. Cause this is when he found out that. You know what I mean? That we was really a comedic. Cause Will ain't even know who I was at first.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

Cause if you go back and watch the second skit, that's when he called me. Hey, hey.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Funny Mike]

So when we got to the set. Cause they shooting. They getting Ready to shoot Bad Boys 3. I don't know. They were shooting Bad Boys 4. They get ready to shoot Bad Boys 4.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay?

[Funny Mike]

And the lady, she walk up, she say, yeah, Will, ready to meet Hei. Hei. I said, who the hell is.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hey.

[Funny Mike]

Hei. So when we got together, right, I said, will, just call me Hei. Hei. And then skip right quick. And he was like, hey, hey, nice to meet you. Hey, hey, keep doing your thing. Hey, hey. But I ain't get a chance to, like, really get no real game from Will. Like, I wanted to, but it was dope, you know what I'm saying? Because Will, we always on the move, so we didn't get a chance, like, to really sit down. And I never got a chance to really politic with Will like I wanted to.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You was in Lil Nas x Old Town Road.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You like doing stuff like that? You like being in videos? You want to do tv? Cause a lot of times, you look at. You look, you go back and Pryor and Murphy and all, you look at all the comedians. All of them have had, you know, the black comedian. A lot of the black comedians even have gone on and parlayed the standup into TV or movies. Is that something that you're looking. You would like to do?

[Funny Mike]

Absolutely, absolutely. I wanna. Yeah, I wanna have at least 10 to 20 to 30. I mean, I done did eight or nine movies, but I want. It's time. I wanna get a movie that. You know what I mean, Just skyrockets. Yeah, I ain't get a chance to do that yet. But, yeah, I was in the old Time Road video. I think the old Time Road video got the most views of all time, right?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Really?

[Funny Mike]

Something like that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I don't know.

[Funny Mike]

I think it got like. You got 2 billion, right? 2 billion?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Funny Mike]

He got 2 billion views. Yeah, I was in. It was me and Chris Rock. I said, yeah, this a horse Horse Classic times bad.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Two billion views, man. You two that put. Hey, you get something.

[Funny Mike]

I want that check. I want what that check look like. I gotta ask the label, man, if they get.

[Shannon Sharpe]

If they give you what, probably about 4,000. I mean, it's done down now, so they probably start out about 4 or 5,000 per million views.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Nice little chunk of change there.

[Funny Mike]

That's a nice little chunk of change, man. I ain't get no check off that. I need to call somebody.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Chris Rock. Chris Rock was also in there, right?

[Funny Mike]

Chris Rock was in it too. Yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Like, when you get an opportunity to get around a Chris Rock or some of these more famous comedians. Do you have a conversation with him

[Funny Mike]

or you just like, man, Chris Rock was in and out so damn fast, I ain't get a chance to talk to him. I didn't get a chance to talk to him at all because he shot his part, and I think he had a hard out. So. But what was dope was when I said, this a horse. Horse. And then I heard Chris Rock say, that's a horse. Horse. I'm like, okay, I'm doing something right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right.

[Funny Mike]

You know what I mean? That was the validation that I got from it. That was dope for me. Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You know, I had Wiz on, and I said, wiz. He like, who can really smoke with you? He's like, probably Snoop.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I think he said, willie Nelson.

[Funny Mike]

Willie Nelson.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I think he said, that's crazy. Cheech and Chong. What? Cheech. Cheech and Chunk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Snoop got that fight. Got that scunion.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, he is. Snoop gonna put some. When he first came to Detroit, at that time, he pulled out something called some bubble gum.

[Shannon Sharpe]

The weed.

[Funny Mike]

Look, you heard him. He thought it hurt. He pulled out some weed called bubble gum, man. One of my homeboys, he smoked the bubble gum with him. He had a seizure.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Come on.

[Funny Mike]

His mama called him, said, you know you ain't supposed to be smoking, Snoop. You know you be having seizures. Snoop came up there with the bubble gum and gave my man a seizure. Listen, listen. I lied for you for. I lied to you.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Gave my boy a seizure.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I know you don't want no more of that, do you?

[Funny Mike]

Oh, no.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I don't even smoke.

[Funny Mike]

When I go see Snoop, he gonna pass me the blunt. I'm gonna pass it right off. Y' all go ahead. Y' all go ahead. I don't know. It's too strong. It's too strong. I'm straight. I'm good.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So now. So that's what they do now. So now people try to come out who couldn't come up with the strongest strand.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, yeah. Cause Wiz, I don't even know. I mean, I met Wiz, but I don't think I actually smoked with Wiz.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause Wiz had. Wiz had his already pre rolled all the way to the thing. He like $50 a joint. I say, $50?

[Funny Mike]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And it's like. I think he said, how much was the box, CJ? Like, 10, 25.

[Funny Mike]

That's that K. That's that KK, right?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. Khalifa, Kush.

[Funny Mike]

Khalifa, Kush. Don't make Kanye mad. You remember last Time he thought he was talking about. He thought he was talking about Kim K. No, listen, Khalifa Kush. Yeah. Leave the KK alone before I'm.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Man, I say, man, how much? He's like, I think they're like 200 pre rolls in there, and they like $50 a joint.

[Funny Mike]

That's crazy. You smoked with him?

[Shannon Sharpe]

No, no, I don't smoke at all. I ain't never smoked.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. Wiz make you stop smoking with. I'm cool. I was in the studio with one time, but I don't remember. We. If we smoked together, we. We smoke with him.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay.

[Funny Mike]

I just don't remember.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Damn.

[Funny Mike]

Too strong. See what I'm saying?

[Shannon Sharpe]

I don't remember how much.

[Funny Mike]

It was $10,000 worthy, bro. You was right. 50.

[Shannon Sharpe]

50 a week. Yeah. What? Yes.

[Funny Mike]

He had brought $10,000.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I started.

[Funny Mike]

I ain't that much smoke in the world.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, the pre rolls. How much free? You know, pre rolls calls, man. They done took the work out of you. Ain't gotta do all this.

[Funny Mike]

I'm just saying, though, it ain't that much smoking in the world, man. Hey, God damn. I'm cool. I'm cool. I don't want no. I don't want no smoke. Literally. Yeah. Huh. Ain't that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Don't want to last him a month? No, he said that lasts him like a week twice.

[Funny Mike]

Yes. He needs some help. Wiz needs some help.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wiz at last.

[Funny Mike]

If ain't like, huh, Two ounces a day. Yeah. Why you smoking two ounces a day? We like what you like. What's on your mind? What do you. What you think about Will we don't like.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Well, he definitely don't be thinking about eating. Cause he's still able. But two. But a buck 85.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah. He's soaking wet. God. About one. About. We about 160. He in that gym, though. Y' all better leave Wiz alone.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, yeah, yeah, I see it. Yeah, you saw it.

[Funny Mike]

Yeah, you better leave alone. He hit you with a flying elbow.

[Shannon Sharpe]

This concludes the first half of my conversation. Part two is also posted, and you can access it to whichever podcast platform you just listened to part one on. Just simply go back to Club Shay Shay profile and I'll see you there.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

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[Funny Mike]

I'm US Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy. We all get distracted when we drive,

[Shannon Sharpe]

whether it's from our phones or kids

[Funny Mike]

in the backseat bickering.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But how we handle these distractions can be a matter of life or death.

[Funny Mike]

Before you get on the road for

[Shannon Sharpe]

your next road trip, please put your phones on silent and take a mental note to focus on driving. Paid for by NHTSA

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