Club Shay Shay Podcast Summary
Episode: Humble Baddies - Boundaries, Beds, & Betrayals
Release Date: July 22, 2025
Host/Authors: Cheryl Rosado and Alexis Sotomayor

Introduction

In the "Humble Baddies - Boundaries, Beds, & Betrayals" episode of Club Shay Shay, hosts Cheryl Rosado and Alexis Sotomayor delve deep into the intricacies of modern relationships, emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries, understanding personal space, and navigating the complexities of friendships and business partnerships. The conversation is rich with personal anecdotes, practical advice, and candid reflections, making it a valuable listen for anyone looking to cultivate healthy and fulfilling relationships.

1. Recent Life Updates and Personal Achievements

Cheryl's Business Endeavors

Cheryl begins by sharing her recent successes in the business realm, highlighting significant events and expansions:

• Houston Event Success: Cheryl recounts a major event organized by her team leader in Houston, which proved to be highly successful.
  “The business is going amazing. I was in Houston, my team leader in Houston put on a big event for my agents. There were so it was an amazing event that went well.”
  (Timestamp: 04:28)

• Expansion to Dallas: Cheryl discusses the opening of a new sales office in Dallas, emphasizing her commitment to supporting her team.
  “Next we're opening up a sales office so I'm gonna go there and support the team there.”
  (Timestamp: 04:32)

Alexis's Vegas Summit Experience

Alexis shares her recent trip to Las Vegas, where she participated in a two-day summit focused on empowering women in sports:

• Panel Participation: She was on a panel alongside Swin Cash, an Olympian and WNBA player, discussing platforms for women in sports.
  “It was a girls trip, it was like a sister's trip. And just spoke on a panel for she's got time. Swin Cash, the Olympian, the WNBA player has a platform for women in sports and it was a summit, a two day summit.”
  (Timestamp: 04:43)

• Personal Fulfillment: Alexis expresses how fulfilling the experience was, reconnecting with old friends and seeing her daughters witness her professional endeavors.
  “It was really humbling and very much fulfilling for me. And then to see my daughters, to see me, their mom and her like, you know, spreading joy and speaking on behalf of just like, you know, elevation and your journey as well.”
  (Timestamp: 05:00)

2. Exploring "Sleep Divorce": Redefining Relationship Boundaries

Understanding Sleep Divorce

Cheryl and Alexis introduce the concept of "sleep divorce," where partners opt to sleep in separate beds or rooms to enhance personal rest and reduce conflicts:

• Alexis's Perspective: She elaborates on the practical reasons couples might choose this arrangement, such as differing schedules and the need for personal space.
  “I have like a different schedule. It could be different schedules. And also you can spend the night in my room. It's okay to, you know, have a slumber party.”
  (Timestamp: 07:29)

• Cheryl's Take: Cheryl finds the idea unconventional but acknowledges its benefits, especially for individuals with nocturnal habits or those needing uninterrupted focus.
  “I'm nocturnal, so a lot of times I do a lot of work at night. I don't want my person, my mate to think, oh, what you doing late at night on your computer or on your phone.”
  (Timestamp: 09:17)

Benefits and Challenges

The hosts discuss the advantages, such as improved sleep quality and reduced nighttime disturbances, and potential challenges, including perceptions of emotional distance:

• Alexis on Maintaining Intimacy: She suggests that separating sleep areas doesn't equate to emotional separation and can be managed with intentional romantic interactions.
  “It's intimacy still a priority if you don't share bed at night. Right. You would almost like set up some dates, right?”
  (Timestamp: 12:16)

• Cheryl's Agreement and Additions: Cheryl agrees and adds that it can prevent conflicts arising from habits like snoring or messy sleeping environments.
  “They may not have any problems. They have, they have their relationships great.”
  (Timestamp: 10:20)

Conclusion on Sleep Divorce

Both Cheryl and Alexis conclude that sleep divorce can be a healthy boundary for many couples, fostering both personal well-being and relationship growth when approached thoughtfully.

3. Navigating Friendships in Business

Maintaining Strong Friendships

Cheryl and Alexis emphasize the importance of preserving friendships while engaging in business collaborations:

• Cheryl's Experience: She shares her successful long-term business partnership with her best friend, Christina, highlighting the primacy of their friendship over business.
  “Our friendship comes before any money, any business, anything, as long as we're good. She's a great business partner, and I respect her opinion.”
  (Timestamp: 34:11)

• Alexis's Insights: Alexis discusses the necessity of mutual respect and understanding in business friendships to prevent conflicts and ensure a harmonious working relationship.
  “It takes two strong people that really respect each other and understand what that friendship is from the beginning.”
  (Timestamp: 33:42)

Challenges and Solutions

They acknowledge the potential for tension when personal and professional lines blur but suggest that clear communication and respect can mitigate these issues:

• Cheryl on Public Disagreements: Cheryl shares an incident where she had to address a public criticism, emphasizing the importance of handling conflicts privately.
  “I had to clap back at somebody this weekend. I said I was gonna work on it later.”
  (Timestamp: 27:37)

• Alexis on Trust and Leadership: Alexis underscores the significance of trust in delegating responsibilities and supporting each other’s strengths within business partnerships.
  “That's good leadership on your end too... You built trust, there's loyalty between it.”
  (Timestamp: 33:08)

4. Establishing Financial Boundaries with Family

Protecting Financial Well-being

Cheryl and Alexis discuss the importance of setting financial boundaries to maintain personal and business stability:

• Cheryl on Teaching Financial Responsibility: She illustrates her approach to educating her children about budgeting and responsible spending.
  “I'm teaching them financial literacy and also financial responsibility of budgeting.”
  (Timestamp: 36:47)

• Alexis's Strategies: Alexis recounts her experiences with managing family financial requests, emphasizing the necessity of tough love to prevent entitlement.
  “We got to stop enabling our family members.”
  (Timestamp: 49:17)

Handling Financial Requests

They explore strategies for dealing with family members who request financial assistance, advocating for clear communication and firm boundaries:

• Cheryl's Approach: Cheryl describes limiting financial support to prevent misuse, such as freezing a child’s car due to irresponsible spending.
  “She’s shop... I had to freeze her car.”
  (Timestamp: 38:22)

• Alexis's Firm Stand: Alexis emphasizes the power of saying "no" to financial demands that could jeopardize her financial health.
  “The most powerful word is no, and that's how you keep money.”
  (Timestamp: 43:16)

Balancing Support and Responsibility

They balance the need to support family with the importance of fostering independence and accountability:

• Cheryl's Reflection: Cheryl acknowledges her guilt over limiting financial support but asserts that it's essential for long-term stability.
  “I blame it on myself because I growing up as a child, I didn't have it all.”
  (Timestamp: 39:02)

• Alexis's Encouragement: Alexis encourages family members to take responsibility for their finances, reinforcing the principles of hard work and budgeting.
  “They need to learn how to budget their money.”
  (Timestamp: 40:41)

5. Dealing with Homeowners Associations (HOAs)

HOA Overreach and Harassment

Cheryl and Alexis address the controversial role of HOAs in enforcing neighborhood standards, citing a recent case where a lady was jailed for missing an HOA court date:

• Cheryl's Outrage: Cheryl criticizes the extreme measures some HOAs take, such as imprisoning residents for minor infractions.
  “To go to that extent, to put somebody in jail, this lady has have kids. It's insane.”
  (Timestamp: 52:30)

• Alexis's Concerns: Alexis expresses frustration with HOAs’ strict enforcement, advocating for a balance between maintaining aesthetics and respecting homeowners’ autonomy.
  “I would be heartbroken if I had to go to jail off of my paint being chipped or something like that would be devastating.”
  (Timestamp: 54:58)

Pros and Cons of HOAs

They discuss the benefits of HOAs in maintaining property values and neighborhood aesthetics, juxtaposed with the drawbacks of overregulation and potential abuse of power:

• Cheryl on Neighborhood Standards: Cheryl acknowledges that while HOAs help keep neighborhoods attractive, they can become tyrannical if not moderated.
  “Some HOAs, you see them go too serious... It's insane.”
  (Timestamp: 57:17)

• Alexis on Property Value Protection: Alexis highlights the positive impact of HOAs in preserving property values but warns against excessive control that infringes on personal freedoms.
  “You want the neighborhood to be up to par.”
  (Timestamp: 50:19)

Final Thoughts on HOAs

Both hosts agree that while HOAs play a role in community management, there needs to be a check to prevent misuse of authority and ensure that homeowners are treated fairly:

• Cheryl's Hope: Cheryl hopes that the impacted lady doesn't have to sell her home and that HOAs find a balanced approach.
  “Don't let nobody force you up out of your place.”
  (Timestamp: 57:24)

• Alexis's Advice: Alexis advises prospective homeowners to evaluate the reputation and strictness of HOAs before purchasing property to avoid future conflicts.
  “When you're looking at properties, like to ask the neighbors, what do you think about your HOA.”
  (Timestamp: 57:46)

Conclusion

In this episode of Club Shay Shay, Cheryl Rosado and Alexis Sotomayor offer a candid exploration of personal boundaries, the dynamics of modern relationships, and the challenges of balancing personal life with professional and familial obligations. Through their insightful dialogue, they provide listeners with practical advice on maintaining healthy relationships, setting financial boundaries, and navigating the often contentious world of homeowners associations. The conversation underscores the importance of communication, respect, and personal well-being in fostering meaningful and sustainable connections.

Notable Quotes:

• Cheryl Rosado:
  “I feel like it's not a bad idea to have that when you look at overall.”
  (Timestamp: 09:17)

• Alexis Sotomayor:
  “The most powerful word is no, and that's how you keep money.”
  (Timestamp: 43:16)

• Cheryl Rosado:
  “I blame it on myself because I growing up as a child, I didn't have it all.”
  (Timestamp: 39:02)

• Alexis Sotomayor:
  “They need to learn how to budget their money.”
  (Timestamp: 40:41)

• Cheryl Rosado:
  “Don't let nobody force you up out of your place.”
  (Timestamp: 57:24)

• Alexis Sotomayor:
  “When you're looking at properties, like to ask the neighbors, what do you think about your HOA.”
  (Timestamp: 57:46)

This comprehensive summary encapsulates the key discussions and insights shared by Cheryl Rosado and Alexis Sotomayor in the "Humble Baddies - Boundaries, Beds, & Betrayals" episode, providing a valuable overview for both frequent listeners and newcomers alike.