Podcast Summary: Club Shay Shay
Episode: Humble Baddies Part 2 - High Value Man Debate (Cont.) + Benny Blanco's Relationship Advice
Release Date: April 3, 2025
Host/Authors: iHeartPodcasts, The Volume, and Shay Shay Media
1. Introduction
In this engaging episode of Club Shay Shay, hosts Cherelle, Alexis, and Ashley delve deeper into the ongoing debate surrounding the concept of the "High Value Man." The conversation seamlessly transitions into relationship advice inspired by Benny Blanco, a renowned music producer known for his insightful perspectives on partnerships. The episode also features interactive segments addressing listener questions, adding a personal touch to the discussion.
2. High Value Man Debate Continues
Timestamp: 01:02 - 10:40
The hosts kick off the episode by revisiting the topic of whether women should date multiple men simultaneously. Cherelle passionately advocates for the freedom to explore different relationships until a committed, verbal agreement is reached between partners.
Cherelle (02:21):
"Until he says, 'We are together, we are committed,' you are free to be liberated and understand who you are." [02:21]
Alexis (03:25):
"I feel like it's okay for women to date multiple men at once. You don't have to sleep with every one of them." [02:47]
Although Cherelle supports dating multiple men, she emphasizes the importance of not engaging in sexual relationships with all partners until a clear commitment is established. Ashley shares her personal stance, expressing a preference for monogamy once she finds someone she is truly interested in.
Ashley (05:06):
"Yeah, I mean, I feel like you should definitely get out there, see what you like. But once you find that one person, it's like I'm obsessed about that one person." [05:19]
The conversation highlights the balance between exploring options and establishing meaningful connections. Cherelle encourages open communication and understanding between partners to navigate the complexities of modern relationships.
Cherelle (04:36):
"I teach my boys to court women and show them who you are. I expect my daughters to see what's going on and understand who they like." [04:36]
3. Benny Blanco's Relationship Advice
Timestamp: 11:26 - 25:20
Transitioning to Benny Blanco's relationship insights, the hosts commend his approach to fostering healthy partnerships. Cherelle highlights Blanco's emphasis on understanding and supporting one's partner to help them achieve their best selves.
Cherelle (13:14):
"It's a beautiful thing when men have awareness of their partner. I love how Benny is advocating for men to support their spouses and help them be their best selves." [13:14]
Alexis echoes this sentiment, noting the potential for a positive domino effect as more men adopt Blanco's philosophy.
Alexis (16:32):
"It's a domino effect. Shout out to our humble daddy, Benny." [16:32]
The discussion underscores the importance of emotional intelligence and proactive communication in relationships. The hosts appreciate Blanco's vulnerability in sharing his relationship blueprint, which includes setting clear expectations and fostering mutual growth.
Cherelle (13:10):
"He wrote about it. He discussed having a list with his therapist outlining the qualities he wanted in a partner. It's about emotional growth and open communication." [13:10]
4. Humble Baddies Mail: Marijuana in Relationships
Timestamp: 25:20 - 31:02
In the interactive segment, Jasmine from Atlanta reaches out with concerns about her husband's recent marijuana use, which contradicts their initial stance against drug use. The hosts provide thoughtful advice on navigating this sensitive issue.
Jasmine's Question:
"My husband and I have been together for seven years, and recently, I've started noticing the smell of marijuana in his car. Should this be a deal-breaker?" [25:35]
Cherelle responds by normalizing marijuana use, especially in states where it is legal for medicinal or recreational purposes. She encourages open dialogue to understand the underlying reasons for her husband's behavior.
Cherelle (26:45):
"Marijuana is a herb, rooted and cultivated. Have a conversation with him to understand what's going on. It might be a way for him to relieve stress." [26:45]
Alexis adds that as long as marijuana use doesn't interfere with his responsibilities, it shouldn't be a major issue. She emphasizes the importance of communication to address any potential underlying problems.
Alexis (28:28):
"Have a conversation like, 'Hey, I've noticed you've been smoking. How long have you been doing this?' It's nothing to act crazy about." [28:28]
Ashley supports the idea of addressing the issue calmly, suggesting that it could be indicative of other stressors in the relationship.
Ashley (28:40):
"Maybe he's using this to relieve stress or there's something you don't know about. Since you've been married for seven years, you should be able to talk about things openly." [28:40]
5. Breaking Generational Cycles in Emotional Expression
Timestamp: 20:25 - 25:17
A significant portion of the discussion centers on the societal expectations placed on men regarding emotional expression. Alexis passionately advocates for breaking the "generational curses" that discourage men from showing vulnerability.
Alexis (22:59):
"We have to teach our boys that it's okay to cry, express emotions, say 'I love you,' and show affection. It's time to break that cycle." [22:59]
Cherelle concurs, emphasizing the need for emotional intelligence and support systems to foster healthier relationships.
Cherelle (24:22):
"We understand that young men have emotional intelligence, but it's often suppressed by ultra-masculinity. Fathers need to change the narrative." [24:22]
Ashley adds that providing men with positive examples of emotional expression can help them develop healthier ways to relate to their partners and families.
Ashley (22:18):
"If they never saw an example of showing love, it's hard for them to know. We need to have those conversations and tell them specifically how we feel loved." [22:18]
6. Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Timestamp: 31:02
The episode concludes with the hosts encouraging listeners to subscribe and engage with the Humble Baddies community for more relationship advice and discussions. They reiterate the importance of open communication, emotional intelligence, and breaking down societal barriers to foster meaningful connections.
Cherelle (30:24):
"Thank you so much, Jasmine, for writing to us. If you need advice, reach out to humblebaddies@contacthumblebaddies.com." [30:24]
Alexis (31:02):
"Make sure y'all subscribe to Humble Baddies podcast and tell your cousins, neighbors, sisters, coworkers, brothers, side chicks, side mans to follow us as well." [31:02]
Notable Quotes with Timestamps
-
Cherelle (02:21):
"Until he says, 'We are together, we are committed,' you are free to be liberated and understand who you are." -
Alexis (03:25):
"I feel like it's okay for women to date multiple men at once. You don't have to sleep with every one of them." -
Cherelle (13:14):
"It's a beautiful thing when men have awareness of their partner. I love how Benny is advocating for men to support their spouses and help them be their best selves." -
Alexis (22:59):
"We have to teach our boys that it's okay to cry, express emotions, say 'I love you,' and show affection. It's time to break that cycle." -
Cherelle (26:45):
"Marijuana is a herb, rooted and cultivated. Have a conversation with him to understand what's going on. It might be a way for him to relieve stress."
Final Thoughts
This episode of Club Shay Shay offers insightful discussions on navigating modern relationships, the importance of emotional intelligence, and the value of supportive partnerships as highlighted by Benny Blanco's advice. The hosts provide relatable advice and foster a space for open dialogue, encouraging listeners to cultivate healthy, fulfilling relationships.
