Humble Baddies - Part 2: The rise of the Micro cheater & Humble baddies mail

Summary

Club Shay Shay Episode: Humble Baddies - Part 2: The Rise of the Micro Cheater & Humble Baddies Mail
Release Date: May 15, 2025
Host: NFL Legend Shannon Sharpe
Co-Hosts: Ashley Nicole, Portia Berto, and Alexis Ottemeyer

---

Introduction

In this episode of Club Shay Shay, hosts Ashley Nicole, Portia Berto, and Alexis Ottemeyer delve into the nuanced topic of micro cheating, exploring its impact on relationships and modern dating dynamics. The discussion is enriched with personal anecdotes, expert insights, and interactive segments that engage both the hosts and listeners.

---

The Rise of the Micro Cheater

Defining Micro Cheating
The conversation kicks off at [02:09] with Alexis introducing the concept of micro cheating—a term that encapsulates subtle yet boundary-crossing behaviors in relationships that may not constitute outright infidelity but still breach trust. "He's on dating apps for the memes," Alexis explains at [08:03], highlighting how seemingly harmless actions can signal deeper issues.

Discussion and Analysis
Ashley Nicole raises the question, "[02:28] Have y'all heard of that before?" prompting the hosts to explore various scenarios that fall under micro cheating. The hosts debate whether these actions are indicative of loyalty issues or lowkey betrayals. Lex emphasizes the gateway nature of such behaviors, stating at [02:52], "Honey, that's a gateway cheater right there."

Emotional vs. Physical Cheating
A significant portion of the discussion revolves around whether emotional cheating is more detrimental than physical cheating. Ashley Nicole shares her perspective at [04:18], arguing that emotional investing creates a deeper connection: "Emotional cheating is an investment... it's way worse." Lex counters by suggesting that perceptions may vary based on gender, adding at [05:19], "If you ask a man which is worse, I'm going to say the physical."

Key Quotes:

• Alexis Ottemeyer [08:03]: "He's on dating apps for the memes."
• Ashley Nicole [04:18]: "Emotional cheating is an investment. It's way worse."
• Lex [05:19]: "If you ask a man which is worse, I'm going to say the physical."

---

Cheater or Chill: Interactive Scenarios

Gameplay Introduction
At [07:10], Alexis introduces "Cheater or Chill," an interactive segment where the hosts present micro cheating scenarios, and each host must quickly decide if it's harmless ("Chill") or indicative of cheating ("Cheater").

Sample Scenarios and Reactions:

1. Following an Ex Without Liking Photos

   • Scenario [07:55]: "He still follows his ex but never likes her pics."
   • Lex [07:55]: "He's a cheater in training."

2. Sending Heart Emojis to Celebrities

   • Scenario [08:20]: "He sends heart emojis to girl stories, but only celebrities and influencers."
   • Ashley Nicole [08:20]: "He's a lame but horny."

3. Deleting Messages to Hide Interactions

   • Scenario [08:40]: "He deletes messages so you won't get the wrong idea."
   • All Hosts [08:40]: "Cheater."

4. Flirting with a Waitress for Discounts

   • Scenario [09:40]: "He flirts with the waitress to get a discount, but says it's just jokes."
   • Mixed Reactions [09:47]: Lex and Alexis debate its severity, ultimately leaning towards it being more benign.

Insights:
This segment underscores how seemingly minor actions can be interpreted differently based on context and individual perceptions. The hosts emphasize the importance of communication and setting boundaries to navigate these gray areas.

---

Humble Baddies Mail: Listener Questions

Listener Inquiry from Orlando [27:35]
A listener from Orlando writes in with concerns about her two-year relationship. She notices a shift in her partner's sexual preferences, specifically his insistence on anal sex and avoidance of vaginal intimacy. This has led her to question his sexual orientation and the overall health of their relationship.

Hosts' Response and Discussion:
Alexis and Lex engage in a candid and sometimes humorous discussion addressing the listener's situation. They explore possible reasons behind her partner's behavior, ranging from physical preferences to deeper emotional or sexual orientation issues.

Key Quotes:

• Alexis Ottemeyer [28:19]: "I just want to offend people."
• Lex [32:00]: "He might be gay because he's doing other things."
• Ashley Nicole [33:36]: "That's awful. I'm so sorry for you."

Takeaway:
The hosts highlight the importance of open communication and seeking professional advice when faced with complex relationship challenges. They also emphasize not jumping to conclusions without understanding the full context.

---

Audience Questions and Fun Segments

Childhood Food Memories [12:08]
Listeners share their favorite childhood foods, sparking a nostalgic conversation among the hosts. From barbecue and fried fish sandwiches to Cream of Wheat, each host reminisces about the dishes that bring back fond memories.

Social Media Pet Peeves [14:39]
The hosts discuss what annoys them on social media. Common grievances include premature concert posts and overzealous podcast promotions. "Everybody's got a podcast," Lex jokes at [15:40], highlighting the saturation of content creators online.

Celebrity IAM Unproblematic [23:07]
The hosts debate which celebrities they consider "unproblematic." Kerry Washington and Beyoncé emerge as top contenders for their private lifestyles and minimal public controversies. "She's just good. She keeps her stuff," Lex comments at [25:16].

Swapping Lives for a Day [25:28]
A lighthearted segment where hosts imagine swapping lives with celebrities like Zendaya and Zoe Saldana. The playful banter reveals their admiration for these stars' versatility and public personas.

---

Conclusion

As the episode wraps up, the hosts encourage listeners to continue submitting their questions and stories for future episodes of Humble Baddies Mail. They express gratitude for the engaging discussions and the supportive community of listeners.

Final Thoughts: The episode effectively combines serious discussions about relationship dynamics with entertaining segments, offering both depth and levity. The interactive "Cheater or Chill" game and listener mail segments provide valuable insights while keeping the audience engaged.

Notable Closing Quote:

• Alexis Ottemeyer [33:45]: "Thanks for writing this, you guys. Please continue to write to Humble Baddies mail."

---

Connect with the Hosts:

• Ashley Nicole: Instagram - @ashleynicole
• Portia Berto: Instagram - @portiaberto
• Alexis Ottemeyer: Instagram - @alexissottemeyer

---

Thank you for tuning into Club Shay Shay. Stay connected for more insightful conversations with top athletes, celebrities, and influencers.

Transcript

[Ashley Nicole]

You're listening to an iHeart podcast.

[Portia]

This is what you do. When you have high standards and fancy all the fancy things like a Dior saddlebag or that diamond tennis bracelet, you go to ebay. There you'll find new loves that will never disappoint. Expertly authenticated. Whether it's that vintage pearl necklace or brand new ruby earrings, a Prada crossbody bag, or classic watches like that Rolex Oyster or that Cartier tank on ebay, there are no limits to your high standards. Yeah, ebay the place for new, pre loved, vintage and rare fashion. Ebay. Things people love.

[Ameca Insurance]

At Ameca Insurance, we know it's more than just a car. It's the two door coupe that was there for your first drive. The hatchback that took you cross country and back, and the minivan that tackles the weekly carpool for the cars you couldn't live without. Trust Ameca Auto Insurance. Ameca empathy is our best policy.

[Designer Shoe Warehouse]

This season. Let your shoes do the talking. Designer Shoe warehouse is packed with fresh styles that speak to your whole vibe without saying a word. From cool sneakers that look good with everything to easy sandals you'll want to wear on repeat. ESW has you covered. Find a shoe for every hue from the brands you love like Birkenstock, Nike, Adidas, New Balance and more. Head to your DSW store or visit DSW.com today. Hello, it is Ryan. And we could all use an extra bright spot in our day, couldn't we? Just to make up for things like sitting in traffic, doing the dishes, counting your steps. You know, all the mundane stuff. That is why I'm such a big fan of Chumba Casino. Chumba Casino has all your favorite social casino style games that you can play for free, anytime, anywhere with daily bonuses. So sign up now at chumba casino. That's chumbacasino.com no purchase necessary.

[Lex]

VGW Group void.

[Alexis]

We're prohibited by law 21/ terms and conditions apply. All right, let's move on to segment three. The rise of the micro cheater. Have y' all heard of that before?

[Ashley Nicole]

No. A micro cheater?

[Lex]

Literally Ever? No.

[Ashley Nicole]

Never heard that.

[Alexis]

Let me, let me, Let me go. He didn't smash, didn't link. But he's still reacting to stories with hard eyes. Staying in contact with his work wife and watches his ex's every IG story. So what is it? Loyalty or lowkey betrayal?

[Lex]

Honey, that's a gateway cheater right there.

[Ashley Nicole]

He's well on his definitely, definitely warming it up.

[Alexis]

Yeah, no, that's a lot. All right. So we're going to define and dissect micro cheating. All the little behaviors that technically aren't cheating, but still definitely cross the boundaries. I'm going to give y' all some scenarios. He deletes DMs before showing you his phone just to avoid drama.

[Ashley Nicole]

Micro cheater and cheater.

[Alexis]

Yeah. What do you say, Portia?

[Lex]

I feel like, in general, because men don't know how to navigate situations, they try to avoid them all together. That's what I think. I think his stupidity will have him deleted, even if he's not trying to be malicious. He's first. He just died.

[Alexis]

Okay. She keeps her old situationship in her close friends, but swears they don't talk anymore. Cheetah, Cheetah, Pumpkin, E. She's not.

[Ashley Nicole]

She's being deceptive.

[Alexis]

He's on dating apps for the memes. They got memes on dating apps.

[Ashley Nicole]

Wait, what? He's on dating apps for the.

[Alexis]

For the memes.

[Lex]

Peter. Oh, I don't know.

[Alexis]

Yeah, well, why he on a dating.

[Lex]

App if you're on a dating app?

[Alexis]

I've seen.

[Ashley Nicole]

I've seen married men on a dating app.

[Lex]

Then they troll them for cat. Those are cheaters.

[Ashley Nicole]

Okay?

[Lex]

That's it.

[Alexis]

All right. So is emotional cheating worse than physical cheating?

[Ashley Nicole]

Yes, I think it is. I think it is. It's emotional is an investment. Whereas, you know, physical cheating can be a one off. And there's no connection. There's no deep, you know, deep connection. No, it's just more of a less thing. Whereas emotional, you're basically going through someone's layers of their mind, how they think you're getting to know them. It's an investment of time. Whereas, you know, it can be something very minute. It could be a two minute situ. A two minute situation, and that's it. You know, you can shut that off. Whereas emotional, you can't. You know, you're starting to think about this person, feel this person, understand this person. Like, get this person. You know, that's an investment. So emotional to me is way worse.

[Lex]

I think that depends on who you're asking. Because if you ask a man which is worse, I'm going to say the physical. If you ask a woman, she's going to say emotional, because we are emotional. And honestly, the truth is, I can fall in love with a door handle if it treats me well. I'm a woman. I can fall in love with anything if I really put my mind to it. You understand? So I would say, oh, yeah, emotional, because he's thinking about her. But let Me go out and physically do something with a man and think that my husband will ever be able to get over it, ever, ever, ever.

[Ashley Nicole]

He was definitely a double standard.

[Alexis]

Like, we never be able to get.

[Ashley Nicole]

Over that would never.

[Lex]

He would never be able to get over something to this guy. Kind of like him, like.

[Alexis]

And then it ain't gonna hit him in the butt defense. He is still just as bad because, like, I'm thinking about.

[Ashley Nicole]

It's very bad.

[Alexis]

Yeah.

[Ashley Nicole]

I'm thinking about all of that.

[Alexis]

I know. At this point, do you feel like you like a man over there and you felt. You think you done fell in love with somebody cool, but you went and had sex with her, and then you came back and had sex with me, and now my health is in jeopardy.

[Ashley Nicole]

Oh, everything is bad. It's both bad. Okay. Oh, it's. It's horrific. I'm not saying one is worse because.

[Alexis]

Now you got emotional. Is. No. So for me, they equally. I would say. I can't say which I think they equally. Horrible. Horrible. Don't do it.

[Ashley Nicole]

Well, to me, my definition of cheating anyway, is anything you wouldn't do in front of your partner. So it can.

[Alexis]

It can.

[Ashley Nicole]

It can be so many different layers of. If you're going to try to start hiding things, covering up things, deleting things, all that kind of stuff, you know, you're not being your authentic self.

[Lex]

Yeah.

[Ashley Nicole]

But I think emotional is a little bit worse because now there's time invested.

[Alexis]

Yeah. Well, that little two minutes of pleasure, they're both horrible. Yeah. All right, so I got a game, Cheater or chill. So I'm going to present a micro cheating scenario, and y' all have to quickly decide if it's a cheater or chill, AKA harmless. And to spice it up, you have to explain your answer, and then we're gonna, you know, vote if we agree or not. All right, so he still follows his ex, but never likes her pics. Cheater or chill. He still loves the ex.

[Lex]

He's a cheater in training.

[Alexis]

Okay.

[Lex]

Hibernating. His hibernation. Cheating. He's about. He's gearing up.

[Alexis]

Yeah. I think he's keeping his options.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah.

[Alexis]

Open or something.

[Lex]

Like why he's gearing up. Gotta keep your eye.

[Alexis]

All right. He sends heart emojis to girl stories, but only celebrities and influencers. He's a lame but horny.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah. I was like.

[Lex]

You'Re adorable.

[Alexis]

So y' all gonna chill on that one? He's not a cheater.

[Lex]

No, I don't want him. I don't Care what he's.

[Alexis]

He deletes messages so you won't get the wrong idea. Cheater or chill.

[Lex]

Cheater.

[Alexis]

Cheater.

[Lex]

I don't know.

[Alexis]

All right.

[Ashley Nicole]

Cheater.

[Lex]

It's cheatish.

[Alexis]

Yeah.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, exactly.

[Alexis]

It's on this.

[Ashley Nicole]

On the scale. It's on the scale.

[Alexis]

He never posts you, but always post thirst traps.

[Lex]

He's a whore. I'm kidding.

[Ashley Nicole]

On the way.

[Alexis]

Okay.

[Lex]

She's on the way. He's looking for something better.

[Alexis]

Okay.

[Lex]

She's looking for something better for sure.

[Alexis]

He texts a co worker good morning every day just to be nice.

[Lex]

He want to die.

[Ashley Nicole]

That's horrible.

[Alexis]

He's unhinged, but swears he's not meeting cheating.

[Lex]

Yep.

[Ashley Nicole]

Unhinged. Just is it Hinge is definitely.

[Alexis]

I mean, she keeps her work saved under a fake name already.

[Lex]

Cheated.

[Ashley Nicole]

Cheating.

[Alexis]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Lex]

The next man that's her next boyfriend.

[Alexis]

He flirts with the waitress to get a discount, but says it's just jokes.

[Lex]

Cheater.

[Ashley Nicole]

I don't think so.

[Lex]

If it's bad cheating, then. Okay, not bad cheating. If it's. If he's flirting and it's like, good flirting, he's a cheater. If it's bad flirting, then it's funny.

[Alexis]

Okay, so you're saying, like, what kind of flirting is bad flirting with a waitress? Like, if he's like.

[Ashley Nicole]

If we're there and hanging out, you know, the. The waitress, you know is there. Again, it's in front of you, not.

[Alexis]

In front of you. I think this is when you're not there. Oh, yeah, you're not there. And he's like, hey, sweetheart, you looking mighty fine tonight. Can you bring me.

[Lex]

That's bad flirting.

[Alexis]

Horrible flirting.

[Lex]

Mighty fine tonight if she. Good luck, girl.

[Ashley Nicole]

I mean, y' all think that's cheating, but. No, no, no.

[Lex]

I can't slap cheating on that. I don't think.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, I was about to say that.

[Lex]

You know what if his only jolly is going to this restaurant and say.

[Alexis]

Hey, you mighty, mighty text.

[Ashley Nicole]

Like, live your life, bro.

[Alexis]

Let's see. He's been single on Facebook for three years, but you've been together for two.

[Ashley Nicole]

Who checks their Facebook anymore?

[Lex]

I don't like niggas who Facebook. Sorry.

[Ashley Nicole]

He probably forgot who's even on this. Like that.

[Alexis]

Maybe not Facebook.

[Ashley Nicole]

I'm sorry.

[Alexis]

You don't post their relationship status on other social media.

[Ashley Nicole]

So if you keeping up with that, Yeah, I think you might be a boo.

[Alexis]

I got check pills right now. Let me see what his thing say.

[Lex]

You could be a boomer if you.

[Ashley Nicole]

That's Hilarious.

[Lex]

That is on Facebook. You might belong on My mom and them. I'm just saying.

[Ashley Nicole]

My mom and them and auntie and M. Right.

[Lex]

All right.

[Alexis]

Classic. Last one. She shares IG quotes like, a man is only as loyal as his options.

[Lex]

She's hurt somebody cheated on her. Yeah.

[Alexis]

Just need therapy.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah. I'm writing two.

[Alexis]

Something. That was cute. That was. Okay, that's. That's a new term. Micro cheaters.

[Lex]

Yeah.

[Ashley Nicole]

Learn that today.

[Alexis]

Yeah. Don't y' all be out here micro cheating.

[Lex]

And I ain't never heard that.

[Alexis]

All right, so our last segment of the night. Before we get to humble Baddy mail, we have a few questions from the humble baddie fans. So first question. What food instantly reminds you of your childhood.

[Ashley Nicole]

Barbecue? Because I'm from Boston City, Missouri, home of the best barbecue. If that. That would be it. The smell of the. The barbecue sauce, the smokiness that taps into my child because my dad would cook it. He was. We had a big pit in the backyard, and so. And then we would go to Gates. Shout out to Gates. They're also family friends. So we would go there, get the. The slabs and. Or the. The brisket. And then they had this. The white bread underneath to catch all the grease and all the. The sauce. And then the pickles. I'll never forget those pickles. They're so good. So that's what it would be for me.

[Alexis]

What about you, Portia?

[Lex]

Burnt hot dogs and peach check soda.

[Alexis]

Oh, burnt hot dogs.

[Ashley Nicole]

Okay.

[Lex]

Like generic. Yes. Yeah, I thought a little burnt on it. Yep.

[Alexis]

Okay.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, mine would be.

[Alexis]

Mine is kind of boring, but Cream of Wheat, because my. My dad used to make it for me, like, for breakfast, you know, but not all the time. You know what I'm saying? And when I. He would make it for me, because the way he made it, it was just. I don't know, it was like my daddy's Cream of Wheat. Yeah. So, yeah, that kind of brings me back.

[Ashley Nicole]

Girl. Is that a Midwest thing or not?

[Alexis]

But that was more every day, like, regular. But when my dad made his cream a week, he made his cream, you know what I'm saying?

[Ashley Nicole]

Special.

[Lex]

Yeah. Don't nobody eat cream and wheel every week. Like, you could have, like, every week.

[Alexis]

But, like, you took some time. Okay, you start.

[Lex]

Yeah.

[Ashley Nicole]

Some love and some intention.

[Lex]

Oh, you know what else makes me.

[Alexis]

Feel like.

[Lex]

Fried fish sandwich on white bread and mustard and. I mean, the white bread that gets stuck to the roof of your mouth.

[Alexis]

Yes. And a paper plate, too.

[Ashley Nicole]

On a plate.

[Lex]

A burn your nose. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

[Alexis]

All right.

[Ashley Nicole]

I like my fish with mustard, too. And, yeah, my stir.

[Alexis]

Okay, what is something you're tired of seeing on social media, Chad?

[Lex]

50.

[Alexis]

50.

[Lex]

50, 50. Who paying the bills? I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired of 50 50.

[Ashley Nicole]

I'm tired of seeing the concerts that people are posting, and we haven't seen them yet, so.

[Alexis]

Okay, okay.

[Ashley Nicole]

Let us see something. Let it come to our city first. We done seen outfits. I know. Dance moves. I know the list. I appreciate it. I know I'm gonna be ready.

[Alexis]

I'm gonna be like, ooh, I know this song. Coming up next. Okay, period. Like, you know, that does kind of.

[Lex]

Make it fun for the later shows.

[Alexis]

It's like, I know what to wear. Don't wear that. Cause you look crazy. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm over here peeping. Like, okay, I need to make sure. Like, I'm looking that way when she come out. Cause she gonna come out over there.

[Ashley Nicole]

Like, be ready.

[Alexis]

I'm be ready.

[Lex]

What you tired of seeing? What are you tired of, Ashley?

[Alexis]

What am I tired of seeing? I'm tired of seeing the podcast. No, I'm just playing. That's what everybody be saying in the comments. Everybody.

[Ashley Nicole]

Another podcast. Everybody do got a podcast.

[Alexis]

Tired of seeing that comment that everybody. Everybody don't need a podcast. Take their mics away. Like, if y' all.

[Lex]

Why y' all here?

[Alexis]

Y' all don't have to be here.

[Lex]

Everybody do got a podcast. I saw a comment that said that the government dropped off microphones and webcams like they did crack in the 80s.

[Alexis]

And, I mean, that's a funny one. That's a funny one. I'm not gonna lie.

[Ashley Nicole]

If y' all write that comment, I.

[Alexis]

Would laugh at that.

[Lex]

Yeah, that's a good one.

[Alexis]

Be more creative. Be more creative.

[Ashley Nicole]

Be more creative.

[Lex]

Okay.

[Alexis]

Hate in a more funny way. Be funny.

[Lex]

There you go.

[Alexis]

If they made a movie about your life, what which actress would play you?

[Degree]

Hey, so we all make mistakes, but owning up is the right thing to do. You know? A Degree Cool Rush deodorant. Well, last year, they changed the formula, and it did not go well with their fans. Degree's whole thing is it turns up the sweat and odor protection when you turn up the effort. And good thing it does, because Cool Rush fans really turned up the effort to bring back the original formula. One guy even started an online petition, and degree listened. They admitted they effed up and are bringing the original Cool Rush sent back. And it's exactly how you remember it cool, crisp and fresh. It's back in Walmart, Target and other stores now for under $4. There's a reason why it's been the number one men's antiperspirant for the last decade. It's the same reason why people were not happy when it changed. So if you never tried it, it might be a good time to see what the fuss is about. Head to your local Walmart or Target to try the OG degree. Cool rush for yourself.

[Ameca Insurance]

At Ameca Insurance, we know it's more than just a car. It's the two door coupe that was there for your first drive, the hatchback that took you cross country and back, and the minivan that tackles the weekly carpool for the cars you couldn't live without. Trust Ameca Auto Insurance. Ameca Empathy is our best policy.

[Coca-Cola]

Have you ever looked around at your crew and thought, man, these are my people? The ones who turn the smallest moments into memories you'll be talking about for years. The folks who show up when you need them and make your life so much better. Well, now you can make those moments even sweeter because Sherra Coke is back. And this time it's all about celebrating friendships. Whether you're hanging out, watching the game or just chopping it up. There's a Coke for everyone from bestie and bro to classic names like David and Sarah. These special cans and bottles are made for your whole squad. So grab one, crack it open and toast to the people who make life worth celebrating. But don't wait. They won't be around forever. So grab one for everybody, pop the top and keep the good vibes flowing. Next time you're making memories, don't miss your chance to share a Coke or with all your favorite people.

[Claude]

Millions of people have turned to Claude, the AI assistant from Anthropic because it just feels different. Where other AIs often sound a little robotic, Claude has been designed with special research that informs its character, meaning that Claude just gets it when it comes to empathy and emotional intelligence. That's why Claude has become the if you know, you know, choice for dating advice, career coaching, gathering your thoughts for those important life decisions and more. Give Claude a try for free at Claude.com. that's C-L-A-U-E.com and let us know how you feel the difference.

[Ashley Nicole]

I have mine.

[Alexis]

Who?

[Ashley Nicole]

Tracy Ellis Ross.

[Alexis]

Oh yeah, that would be a good one. I could see that one. I could see that. I could see that.

[Lex]

I can see that.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yep.

[Lex]

You know, she has that, that, that tree hugger Vibe like you, too, because you know. You know how you get down. Mother Earth.

[Ashley Nicole]

That's right.

[Alexis]

She's got that say, yeah. Y' all have that same energy, the same accent as you like to call it.

[Ashley Nicole]

I feel like that's who I would let it go. Go ahead and be great, sis. Be great. Who.

[Lex]

Who.

[Alexis]

Who would you have for you, Portia?

[Lex]

I literally have no idea. I have never given this an ounce of thought when I can tell that Alexis actually thought about this before.

[Ashley Nicole]

I have not. Let me just get favored for.

[Lex]

That just came off the dome.

[Ashley Nicole]

I don't believe that's why I said that. That's. I did not know this was a question.

[Alexis]

I'm trying to think. Portia, for you, I like this game. Hold on, let me think. Portia, Portia, actress.

[Lex]

Somebody who looks like me or somebody who can act like me?

[Alexis]

I think it has to be a little both. Like.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, that's what I was up about.

[Alexis]

Who gives your vibe? Oh, I know. Kind of.

[Lex]

Oh.

[Ashley Nicole]

Ooh.

[Alexis]

I might have needed to think a little bit harder, but if this. I would say Zendaya.

[Ashley Nicole]

Oh, I like that.

[Lex]

Yes. They'll throw ass, because, you know I be throwing ass. You know, I like the.

[Alexis]

I don't heard that. Look at it right.

[Lex]

But you've seen me do that.

[Alexis]

Great actress, and I know she would figure it out.

[Lex]

What?

[Alexis]

I can see that I can rise up. No, I don't see.

[Ashley Nicole]

Oh, why?

[Lex]

Because of my attitude. Because I'm loud and I say crazy.

[Ashley Nicole]

She's versatile. She's a great actress.

[Alexis]

Be more older. Like, not older woman, but, like, older. Yeah, Like.

[Lex]

And I'm not an auntie yet.

[Ashley Nicole]

I think, like, Baby Boy. I think of. I think of her and Benjamin Button.

[Lex]

Taraji, and Baby Boy. I get that long ago. Baby Boy.

[Alexis]

See that one?

[Lex]

She gonna have to get about eight shades lighter because, bitch, I am transparent over here. I need a tan so bad. Oh, my God.

[Ashley Nicole]

I mean, I wasn't going off of look.

[Alexis]

Yeah, okay. Mine would be Zoe Saldana.

[Lex]

Yes, absolutely.

[Alexis]

I really like her vibe. I feel like she gives, like, tomboyish, and then she's a really great actress. And. Yeah, I like. I like her. Maybe I just want to be her. Honestly.

[Lex]

Maybe, you know, it's giving skin. It's giving.

[Alexis]

That's who I would.

[Lex]

Yeah, she could probably play, like, a nice Southern girl, too, like, very soon.

[Alexis]

Yeah.

[Lex]

I came up with some good ones.

[Alexis]

Yeah, that's on it.

[Lex]

And get back to y' all.

[Alexis]

Okay, next question. Who is the most unproblematic celebrity in your eyes, unproblematic. Because I can give you a lot of problematic ones.

[Ashley Nicole]

Ones that we don't know anything. That they just mind their business. Oh, I got it. Kerry Washington.

[Alexis]

That's who you are.

[Ashley Nicole]

And that's who's also unprobled.

[Alexis]

Unproblematic.

[Ashley Nicole]

Oh, Harry Washington.

[Lex]

Yeah, People see that a lot.

[Ashley Nicole]

Okay.

[Lex]

And then.

[Ashley Nicole]

And then I feel like she's mostly unproblematic. The most. Most. Because one, she's been married to her husband for years. They keep it out of the everyone's business. And she has two kids that no one knows what they look like. So her no one knows what they.

[Alexis]

Yeah, that's a good one.

[Ashley Nicole]

Kerry Wash. Or that she even had them. Like somebody was saying, I saw something where they were like, yeah, she's like, my two children. They were like, what?

[Lex]

I only know she hasn't of Scandal because I've seen every episode and I'm pretty sure she was pregnant. I know she was pregnant while she was filming Scandal.

[Alexis]

I can't think of none because I only be paying attention to the problematic one.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, I was thinking, never highlight, you know, the ones that are doing good, the ones that are unproblematic.

[Alexis]

You got one, Portia?

[Lex]

No, I'm trying to look on the blogs and see, you know, in the comments, they'll post somebody like, oh, she's so unproblematic. And I'd be like, is she really? But you know what? They are problematic to me. They hit that Internet girl, they start cutting up. Who is unproblematic?

[Ashley Nicole]

Beyonce. She doesn't, like, address anything.

[Alexis]

Beyonce got problems. She's just good. She got good princess.

[Lex]

She's just that. Can you.

[Alexis]

Yes. She's keep her stuff.

[Lex]

She's not like a regular celebrity.

[Alexis]

Yeah.

[Lex]

You know what I think? Yeah, it doesn't count. She's like, in her own stratosphere.

[Ashley Nicole]

She doesn't have to address.

[Alexis]

Yeah. Zendeck.

[Lex]

Unproblematic.

[Ashley Nicole]

That's another good. Yeah.

[Lex]

Unproblematic. Mind her business makes her coin. I agree.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah.

[Portia]

You know.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah.

[Lex]

Stay at the mess.

[Alexis]

Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Okay, we'll go with those two. If you could swap live with anyone for one day, who would it be and why? Beyonce.

[Lex]

I wouldn't.

[Alexis]

I want to see.

[Lex]

I wouldn't. I don't be wanting other people's lives because I don't know what they're going through. I really don't either.

[Alexis]

I don't stop lives with being a thing. I have to pick somebody. If y' all gotta pick somebody.

[Ashley Nicole]

Rihanna.

[Alexis]

Rihanna. Okay. Who you got Portia.

[Lex]

Oh, I don't know. I need somebody who's just as rich with less responsibility, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? I probably try to pick, like, I don't know, Corey Gamble.

[Ashley Nicole]

Wow, that's a good one. That's a good one.

[Lex]

I want to say courtside.

[Alexis]

Probably know all the T2.

[Ashley Nicole]

You said Corey was in a ride on time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, honey, Corey's life. That's pretty good for it.

[Lex]

That is the magnificent right there.

[Alexis]

Right There he is.

[Lex]

That's a well kept. Okay. White wine and them silk pajamas everywhere he go. And I say, you better go. Madame Corey.

[Alexis]

Madame Corey. Now, that's true.

[Lex]

Baddest one out.

[Ashley Nicole]

Okay, okay.

[Lex]

Let me be Corey.

[Alexis]

That's a good one.

[Lex]

That's a good one.

[Ashley Nicole]

That was a great one, actually.

[Lex]

Yeah, that was off the dome, for real. That one hit my spirit. I said, oh, that's the one. That was a good one.

[Alexis]

All right, y' all. That was great. Thank you guys so much for sending in your question. Y' all send in more questions because that was fun. Now it's time for Humble Betty's mail. Lex, you got our humble. Humble Betty's mail for tonight.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yes. Now it's time for Humble Betty's mail. Okay, that was my little intro. I don't know where that came from, but whatever. Anyway, okay, this one comes from a baddie in Orlando, Florida, what's up? Or Old Town. Here's what she wrote. Hey, humble baddies. I need y' all to be for real with me. I've been dating my man for a little over two years now. Things were great in the beginning, the sex, the chemistry, all that. But lately things have gotten weird in the bedroom. Every time we get intimate. The only. He only wants to do anal, like, every time.

[Lex]

Oh.

[Ashley Nicole]

At first I thought it was just him wanting to spice things up. And I was like, okay, cool. But now it's to the point where he'll literally turn me over mid foreplay and go straight to the back door. If I try to initiate regular vaginal. Vaginal. Sorry, vaginal sex. He'll say stuff like, it's just doesn't hit the same or I like it tighter. Oh, like, huh. Sir, this is not a flesh.

[Alexis]

This is not a flesh.

[Ashley Nicole]

This is me. Oh, well, I'll try to ask him about it, but he just laughs it off or gets defensive. So now in my head, like, is my man gay? Is he fantasizing about something else when he's with me? Or is it just some Weird preference thing. I'm not understanding. Please don't clown me. I really am trying to figure out what's going on because the math is not math. And help. Sincerely confused and clenched inwardly.

[Alexis]

Oh, my gosh.

[Lex]

Oh, baby, that's.

[Alexis]

Thank y' all for sending in this because you are being very open and transparent. You know what I'm saying? Brave to, you know, ask us this question and for advice on a situation like this. So thank you for writing us and writing into humble baddies. But I don't know. First of all, I would just say if he only wants anal sex. I would ask him, you know, if he's saying it's not tight enough or whatever. Maybe, like, you could explore options to make your vagina tighter. Because if you have babies, maybe it's not as tight as it used to be and he's used to it being tight.

[Lex]

First of all, that's not.

[Ashley Nicole]

I disagree.

[Lex]

Okay, well, first of all, let me tell you, your cat does not get.

[Ashley Nicole]

First of all.

[Lex]

Well, they have enough.

[Ashley Nicole]

They have that big enough.

[Lex]

Maybe you just got a little weed and. You know, I wouldn't even do that. And I'm not even going to blame you.

[Ashley Nicole]

What'd you say? You got a little pee?

[Lex]

But I'm not even going to say that. I'm. I was to say maybe I'm just a toxic millennial, because obviously I just want to be, like, gay, because he's.

[Alexis]

Obviously, that's what I say, too, but I want to offend people.

[Lex]

It is not bisexual. It's not.

[Ashley Nicole]

He's definitely double. He's definitely figured that out, that that's what he likes.

[Alexis]

But. But it's not gay, though. Yeah. Say it's not gay if it's a woman asked. You know, I'll say what I want.

[Lex]

To say if that's the only thing he want. And he's like, we'll just.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, that's enduring foreplay, too. It's not like I'm trying to find.

[Alexis]

Her a solution that's. Go and see about getting doggy style. Offer that now at the med spots and stuff. You can go get a little. And it apparently tightens it up. I'm just giving her a solution so she don't got to keep getting.

[Ashley Nicole]

Yeah, but she said midplay. Mid foreplay. And then what's. Turn him. Turn her over. Like, and then. I mean, there's different ways. You know, there's different access back there. So he. He opts for the. The higher hole. Like, I mean, on purpose. What is cataloping?

[Lex]

What if he's just unimpressive. I don't know.

[Alexis]

I don't know.

[Lex]

What if it. You know what I mean? Like, what if he's just not maybe.

[Alexis]

Is he giving other. Like, if. Does he have other gay tendencies? Because we can start there. Because if he's doing other things, then yeah, he just gay. You know what I mean? We can just go ahead and just say he's probably just could try to.

[Lex]

Play with his butthole and see how.

[Ashley Nicole]

He feels about it.

[Alexis]

Really? The thing he said that. He said it's not tight anymore, so.

[Ashley Nicole]

He likes it tighter anymore. Wait, he said he likes it tighter. That's why he goes back there every time. He likes it tighter. Like he likes a tighter access point.

[Alexis]

I guess. Yeah. We. Okay. Well, I think.

[Lex]

I don't know. I feel like talking about her. Them fighting words. Bitch. I would have pushed it. I would have pushed him right in his mouth.

[Ashley Nicole]

Like.

[Lex]

What you mean?

[Ashley Nicole]

What?

[Alexis]

It doesn't hit the same. I like it tighter. Yeah. I don't know. I would say.

[Lex]

Say I like esc. No, I feel like he want to fight. I don't. I don't think I would have taken that too well.

[Alexis]

He's probably gay because I just don't know a man. I don't. I ain't never experienced it. Like, I don't know. But I think he might be gay. Let's just.

[Ashley Nicole]

I'm sure it can go. We don't know.

[Alexis]

But it's given gay. Sorry. Sorry. To our reader, ma' am.

[Lex]

Yeah. Though.

[Ashley Nicole]

And that's it.

[Lex]

He said let's. Let's. Let's skip to the good part. Eh.

[Claude]

That's what he said for him though.

[Ashley Nicole]

Very selfish.

[Lex]

Yeah, very selfish. Because that is not the bee's knees.

[Alexis]

That's awful. I'm so sorry for you. That's confused and clenched in Orlando. But thank you for writing us.

[Lex]

Oh, you poor thing.

[Alexis]

Thanks for writing this, you guys. Please continue to write to Humble Baddies mail. You can write to humble bad contact humblebaddies.com. you know, if you have any questions, you need advice, please let us know where your girls. We're going to do our best to answer your questions. Sometimes we don't know and they just be gay. But thanks for tuning in tonight to another episode of Humble Baddies. I'm Ashley Nicole. You can find me at Ashley Nicole Nicole on Instagram and ash3underscore Nicole on everything else. Where can they find you guys?

[Ashley Nicole]

I am alexissottemeyer on Instagram and I just want to say thank you Portia for joining us today. And where can they find you?

[Alexis]

Porsche?

[Lex]

They can find me on Instagram at Portia Berto and I think it's the same on Tik Tok, but I'm not sure. But you can find me. I ain't hard to find. But thank y' all for of course.

[Alexis]

You gotta come back. We love having you. Thank you so much. All right, y' all, thank you so much for tuning in. We'll be back next week. We'll see you next time. Love you.

[Lex]

Bye friends.

[Ryan]

Okay, have you heard about this? Last year, Degree changed the formula for their Cool Rush deodorant. The fans rebelled and wanted the old scent back and Degree listened and that doesn't happen often. They admitted they effed up and are bringing the original Cool Rush scent back. And it's exactly how you remember it. Cool, crisp and fresh. There's a reason why it's the number one men's antiperspirant. And it's back in Walmart, Target and other stores now for under $4. So try it and see what the fuss is about. Head to your local Walmart, Target and try to OG Cool Rush for yourself.

[Designer Shoe Warehouse]

Do you own a business that's ready to thrive? It's time to let Intuit QuickBooks take things like unpaid invoices and tracking expenses off your plate so you can take things to the next level. Intuit QuickBooks is an all in one business platform that can help with those day to day tasks like invoicing and expenses. Manage and grow your business all in one place. Intuit QuickBooks your way to Money Money movement services are provided by Intuit Payments Inc. Licensed as a money transmitter by the New York State Department of Financial Services.

[Claude]

Millions of people have turned to Claude, the AI assistant from Anthropic because it just feels different. Where other AIs often sound a little robotic, Claude has been designed with special research that informs its character, meaning that Claude just gets it when it comes to empathy and emotional intelligence. That's why Clawd has become the if you know, you know choice for dating advice, career coaching, gathering your thoughts for those important life decisions and more. Give Claude a try for free at Claude.com that's C-L-A-U--E.com and let us know how you feel the difference.

[Portia]

Get this Adults with financial literacy skills have 82% more wealth than those who don't. From swimming lessons to piano classes, us parents invest in so many things to enrich our kids lives. But are we investing in their future financial success? With Greenlight you can teach your kids financial literacy skills like earning, saving and investing. And this investment costs less than that. After school treat start prioritizing their financial education and future today with a risk free [e-mail] iheart greenlight.com iheart you're listening.

[Ashley Nicole]

To an iheart podcast.