Nightcap - Hour 1: ageing & dating, Jenkins family, best friends

Summary

Club Shay Shay – Episode: Nightcap - Hour 1: Ageing & Dating, Jenkins Family, Best Friends
Release Date: January 25, 2025
Host: Shannon Sharpe
Guests: Michael, Brittany (Michael's wife), and Ocho

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1. Aging and Dating Dynamics

Shannon Sharpe opens the discussion by delving into the complexities of dating as one ages. He reflects on how relationships evolve and the shifting dynamics that come with age.

• Shannon Sharpe (04:35): "The more options that a woman has, the harder the guy has to come to impress her."

Shannon emphasizes the challenges men face in maintaining relationships as they grow older, highlighting how increased stability and success can paradoxically make it harder to attract and retain a partner.

2. Friendships Amid Relationships

The conversation transitions to how entering a romantic relationship impacts friendships, particularly among women. Drawing on a study by Oxford University, Shannon discusses the natural fading of some friendships when a new relationship takes priority.

• Shannon Sharpe (10:31): "A study by Oxford University researchers found that women typically have five close friends, but lose two of them when entering a new relationship due to reduced time or shifting priorities."

Brittany shares her personal experience, noting that her friend circle remains consistent despite changes in her relationship status, contrasting with the broader trend.

• Brittany (11:09): "My friend circle has always been the same. It's always remained the same."

Shannon and Ocho further explore the dynamics, discussing how single friends may influence the emotional well-being of those in relationships.

3. Racial Profiling Incident in an Affluent Neighborhood

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to Michael sharing a harrowing personal experience of racial profiling in his affluent Ohio neighborhood. Michael recounts an incident where a white woman arrived at his home, questioning his residency, leading to a tense confrontation captured on video.

• Michael (23:05): "I was leaving one of my real estate job sites... a white Caucasian lady... jumped off our front porch screaming, yelling for help."

Shannon probes into the emotional and psychological impact of the incident, and Michael describes the fear and uncertainty he and his family felt during and after the encounter.

• Michael (37:04): "I'm a black man in America that's overcame every obstacle... I want to use this moment... to inspire people to control their emotions."

Brittany adds to the narrative, detailing the lack of support from the homeowners' association (HOA) and the absence of any sincere apology from the aggressor.

• Brittany (29:19): "We have to ride by each other's house. I'm okay with being cordial... but the issue is getting the word out and inspiring others."

The discussion highlights the broader issues of racial discrimination, the challenges of building trust in predominantly Caucasian neighborhoods, and the resilience required to overcome such adversities.

4. Building Communities and Inspiring Change

Michael shares his aspirations beyond real estate development. He aims to build communities that empower minorities and inspire others who look like him.

• Michael (35:11): "I'm here to inspire people, lead people, and show them what a real man is and what a real man is supposed to do."

Shannon commends Michael and Brittany for their composure and strength in handling the situation, emphasizing the importance of emotional control and the positive impact of sharing their story.

• Shannon Sharpe (51:12): "You handled that thing very well... You did everything right."

5. The Role of Best Friends and Support Systems

Towards the end of the episode, Shannon and Ocho discuss the importance of having best friends who provide honest feedback and support, contrasting with the sometimes detrimental influence of entourages.

• Ocho (53:18): "Men are people that don't have their best interest at heart... However, supportive friends can make a significant difference."

Shannon agrees, highlighting the necessity of surrounding oneself with individuals who have one’s best interests at heart, especially in high-pressure environments like the NFL.

Notable Quotes

• Shannon Sharpe (04:35): "The more options that a woman has, the harder the guy has to come to impress her."
• Michael (23:05): "A white Caucasian lady... jumped off our front porch screaming, yelling for help."
• Brittany (29:19): "We have to ride by each other's house. I'm okay with being cordial... but the issue is getting the word out and inspiring others."
• Michael (35:11): "I'm here to inspire people, lead people, and show them what a real man is supposed to do."
• Shannon Sharpe (51:12): "You handled that thing very well... You did everything right."

Conclusion

The episode of Club Shay Shay offers a profound exploration of aging, dating, friendship dynamics, and the impact of racial profiling. Through Michael and Brittany’s candid sharing, listeners gain insight into the resilience required to navigate personal and societal challenges. Shannon Sharpe skillfully guides the conversation, ensuring that the key themes of emotional control, community building, and authentic friendships resonate with the audience.

For those seeking an engaging and heartfelt discussion on these important topics, this episode serves as a compelling listen, offering both personal anecdotes and broader societal reflections.

Transcript

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[Shannon Sharpe]

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[Michael]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

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[Michael]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

Easy. They're from DSW. Because DSW has the exact right shoes.

[Brittany]

For whatever you're into right now.

[Shannon Sharpe]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

Jordan said, who's a better driver, men or women? Who's better driver, Joe?

[Guest]

Men. And there are some women that. That can drive, but the majority of men are good. The majority of women are bad. They can't even parallel park. Oh.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, yeah.

[Guest]

Buy me that Austin, that Austin Powers clip.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, yeah, that's the. Whoa.

[Guest]

She gave. She gave the wheel.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, the wheels came off, didn't it?

[Guest]

Oh, she didn't mess up.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Scratched it to the little ball.

[Ocho]

Lord have mercy.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She done ripped out and she take off running. Hey, call the cops. Leaving the scene of an accident, failing to render aid.

[Guest]

He must have been intoxicated.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Lord hamburger, how she drive? Right into the wall.

[Guest]

Yeah, and you got. You got to learn how to whip. You got to know how to whip that thing.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Lord.

[Guest]

Boom. Gotta bring that thing. Bring it, bring it. Bring it in and come on.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Lord have mercy. I mean, she stepped on the gas too, Ocho.

[Guest]

Too hard. Yeah, she drunk. She drunk. Well, I don't.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I don't know who she worked for, but I don't know if she gonna be employed tomorrow.

[Guest]

Nah, and it's on camera, too. She done broke the people and she take off running.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That's what got it on, Joe. She think I run it. Bam. Like, what the heck?

[Guest]

He tripping.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, your wife is.

[Guest]

She took off.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, she brought in. She out of there, Ocho. What if she don't? What if she don't work there. What if she don't snuck past security?

[Guest]

And to be where she is, they gotta be somebody because Coach Ryan Day had just walked by too.

[Shannon Sharpe]

He was in the car in the front seat.

[Guest]

Oh, he was?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Guest]

Oh, Lord. They gotta be somebody important.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, no, I don't know. She gonna be gainfully employed tomorrow. That's just me. So Matthew Stafford's gonna have options. See, that's the thing that you have. The more options that you have. Ocho, it's just like a relationship. The more options a woman have, the harder the guy gotta come to impress her. If you ain't got no options, the guy. If you got options, you make it 10 million, 15 million, 30 million a year. You got options. The dude that ain't got no options, bro, you got to take whatever. Yeah, whatever. Like you. You got to like her. You know, you get my age, you know, you. You got a few options. They ain't like they used to be, you know, they don't joke. They ain't the options I used to have when I was 35 or when I was 37, you know, your boy about to be 57. So you don't everyone. Hey, you know, your aunt. Your aunt got to get a straggler if necessary. You know what I'm saying?

[Guest]

Don't joke.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I get going to keep it 1000 with y'all fellas. Hey, I'm gonna be. I'm gonna be honest with y'all. Chat. Hey, hey, I ain't got it like that, so I just gotta be honest. O'Shea had options, you know, I was a little diesel up ass, you know what I'm saying? Don't yo make it good.

[Michael]

It ain't the same.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I was in my 30s. No, you know what I'm saying? Hey, so, hey, Ojo, sometimes, you know what you like the ones that got the booty, you know, on the shelf and sitting up there, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, you know, nice tight, you know, hey, hey, I'll be on Instagram. I see them ones like that to come up on Explorer play. I just go ahead and scroll on up. I know y'all ain't even looking at them 57 year old. So let me know if you go by. Let me go look at a watch, Let me look. Let me look at a car something, right? That I gotta. At least I got chance again, huh? Clean it back, don't you? Hey, listen, every man got to know his limitations.

[Guest]

It's one thing about knowing your limitations, but it's also understanding that they don't know no better. They don't know no better. Okay? You have to understand those. That they're going to give an opportunity to. They're competing with everybody else at a chance to be the main. And most of the time, you never will be the main because the guys you chasing, a guy that have a roster and a harem of women.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And they got choices. You know, they called me the pro hustler back in the day, right? I ain't got no monsters like that.

[Guest]

Yes, sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You know what I'm saying? Oh, y'all got some old cars, you roll down the window, you know what I'm saying? You know, I ain't got all them surround sound bones or hard and Karma, you know, 14 speakers in the car and all that stuff. I ain't got no defroster seat. I ain't got no thing to burp, you know, massage my back. But I ain't got all the margins on me.

[Guest]

Listen, age factor, now, I don't think people understand, but listen, especially for when it come to women, too.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And.

[Guest]

And, fellas, if you're gonna get it and get it done, you got to get it done early. When you start hitting your 30s, you hit 35 and you hit 40 and thinking you still got the options you had when you were younger. Oh, no, honey.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, no, wait, boy, listen, you don't.

[Michael]

You don't.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ain't no sense in life.

[Guest]

I don't care how fine he is. I don't care. I don't care how good you think he looks.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You still ain't got the box like you was having when you was in 20.

[Guest]

What you think it is?

[Shannon Sharpe]

And, Ocho, I've been in my 30s, and guess what? In my 50s, I got in my little horn, man. I. Yeah, I think I thought I would be a little bit even more attractive when I got on being. When I got Ben and Thomas Jefferson looking over my shoulder like this here. Don't he look a little better right now? No, he's still old. Yeah. So.

[Guest]

That'S why I hung the jersey up in the rafters, man. I'm hung the jersey up in the rafter.

[Shannon Sharpe]

A study by Oxford University researchers found that women typically have five close friends, but lose two of them when entering a new relationship due to reduced time or shifting priorities. However, those losses are often balanced by gaining a new friend, usually through their partner. Professor Robin Dunbar attributes the trend. The trend to the focused attention on a romantic relationship demands leading to natural fading of some friendships.

[Guest]

I mean, listen, I'm thinking I can only speak from experience. I can only speak from experience for me is regards to any relationships I've gotten in throughout the years. My. My friend circle has always been the same. It's always remained the same.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Did they say women?

[Guest]

Oh, okay, I see. I see. If you're going. I see you going with this, but.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I. I think that's why they be hating. That's what it be talking about. Oh, he ain't nothing on you. He cheating to see y'all trifling. Cause y'all be wanting. Y'all be trying to keep a. Keep her close. Let us spend time with me. Let us spend time with Ocho.

[Guest]

Most of the time, you know what? Her friend girls, they be single. They be single. And I, you know, they're mad because.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She won't go to the club with no more with y'all.

[Wife of Michael]

Right.

[Guest]

Your single friends will keep those that have boyfriends or husbands single.

[Shannon Sharpe]

They want to try to.

[Guest]

What you mean? They want you miserable with them?

[Shannon Sharpe]

They do.

[Guest]

They give. They give you the worst advice and give you the worst advice so you can be miserable with them.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow. I can see that, Ocho. I do. Because, you know, all of a sudden, you know, they used to go to the club, they go on the trips to Cancun, and they go into Tulum and all that. And now she want to spend time with her man, she want to be booed up with me.

[Guest]

You know, it depends on.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You Ain't got no time, so. Oh, you too good to hang out? Yep. Cause I'm in a serious relationship. I'm trying to settle down. I'm going to get married, maybe have kid. Hey, ain't no kid going. Ain't no kids jumping off. Maybe one. I might squeeze out one. I don't know. Have to get this, you know, have to get this. This pipe cleaned out. A little rusty up in there. You know what I'm saying? Don't choke. But get that, you know, I might can squeeze out one.

[Guest]

Yeah, there you go. Well, you know, you got to think, especially depending on who you date after a while. If you're dating after a while, you know, guys will allow their. Women take friend girls go on girl trips, you know, friend girls be going dinner, go to. Go to outings, you know, I think that's healthy for relationships when women can still.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, yeah, I ain't got no problem with that. No, you go, hey, hang with your girl, you know, do your thing. Hey, but just know they don't mean no good. I ain't lied all day. Hey, they happen that you got. Hey, you got a nice life. You got G wagon. You got this. Got this big old house. Yeah, go. You ain't got to work. You got somebody to clean the house three times a week. You got somebody preparing the meals. Hey, your family taken care of. Blah, blah, blah.

[Guest]

Hey, don't mess that up.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Don't mess that up now.

[Guest]

Well, you'd be out there like them, texting three different people to make ends meet. All right, she get the purses, another one get the shoes, another one.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah, you get flowers once a week. You get flowers once a week.

[Guest]

Matter of fact, I done bought you a garden, so you go pick your own flowers.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Man. Five flying girlfriend. See, women got more friends. Women normally have more friends than guys don't show.

[Guest]

Yeah, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When I'm talking about, like, close friends, like, I'm saying, like. Like, you'll actually, like, talk to you know what I'm saying? Like, share things with. Nah. Because, see, for me, if I tell somebody something and I hear it again, I already know where it came from because I ain't talking to people.

[Guest]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

See, girl, like. And see, when somebody tell me something. Ocho, man, can I tell you something? Okay, before you tell me, who else have you told?

[Guest]

Right, right.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Because I don't want you to come back, bring your ass over here to my man. Did you tell? Hell, no. Who did you tail? I ain't want to tell nobody that bull job that you told me. So before you tell me, who did you tell? Man, I'll say. See? Okay, now don't tell me.

[Guest]

Hey, you know what? Hey, it's another question, since we're on the topic. How come women friendships never really last, Especially when it's a group? If they go on a trip together, they come back, nobody's friends no more. They go to dinner parties, you know, everybody split the bill. Then they're not friends no more. Yeah, there's always a story or situation, especially on Twitter or X whatever you want to call it, where this always happened. And it happens continuously. And regardless of age, the teenagers, the older group, even though the, you know, the of age, everybody be going through it always, I'm like, why does it always happen with women? They can never remain friends for a very, very long time. They always end up falling out about something. That's so simple. They give their girlfriend one chance, but they give. They give JoJo, he get 30 chances to mess up. The girl give one chance, she don't come to my birthday dinner. No, I ain't that. I Ain't talking to that bitch.

[Shannon Sharpe]

No. Yeah, women come ojo like. Like, I guess I think I'm unique. Like, I ain't a guy like. Like, if I like my. First of all, I ain't got to worry about this because Bucket and Burns married. But if right, my homeboy is like, okay, you interested in somebody? I'm good. Because I always felt that if you try to holler at me, you trying to get back at them, you try to tick them off. I ain't trying to check my homeboys off. Now, there are some. Some men, your boys? Yeah. Hey, you turn your back, they like.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Cause you know, back. Back with your O'Shea, you know, he said he's never got a stepper. I kept a stepper. You know what I'm saying?

[Guest]

Yes, sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And. And I. If nobody wanted what I. What I needed for, they don't. I need a looker. Yeah, you supposed to be a looker.

[Guest]

I need you to turn heads now.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And I'm always getting there first, because I want you to walk in because I want to see the reaction. I don't care if the guys look. I want to see the women that look. Because if they look, I know I got something. I know I got us. I know I got a winner, right? That's what you need to look. Look here, guys. They hit the crack of dawn and then they ain't saying that. They ain't saying nothing for them, right? But when the women look. Oh, okay. I like what she got on, you know?

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You know, she got on some Tom Ford heels or some YSLs, maybe some Balenciaga boots, you know, Balenciaga got them knee high boots right now. Yeah.

[Guest]

Oh, yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[Guest]

They in season, that is when it's cold.

[Shannon Sharpe]

For sure, for sure. With a nice bag, you know, ysl, Dior, lv, you know, one of them all nice ones.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Man, ain't nothing like. Ain't nothing like a beautiful woman. Nah, ain't nothing like it. Ojo, listen.

[Guest]

God knew what he was doing when he made women in general. That is one of the greatest creations ever known to man. Ever.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Ain't nothing like him. Ocho. A woman that. That work out just a little. I ain't say she. That's gotta be her life, right? But just a little. Ocho.

[Guest]

Yeah.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Lord, forgive me for my ways.

[Guest]

Tough.

[Ocho]

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[Shannon Sharpe]

Mike if you can go back, I know it was November and here we are in late January. If you can recount the events as you remember as vividly as you possibly can.

[Michael]

Yeah, I can remember. It wasn't too long ago I was leaving one of my real estate job sites in the inner city, wrapping it up for the day. It was about 5:15. Took me about 45 minutes to get home. So I'm proud to go home. Shannon, Something I want you to know is when they say it's a affluent neighborhood, it's one of the most wealthiest neighborhoods in Ohio.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Congrats.

[Michael]

And my house, my house is the best house.

[Shannon Sharpe]

That's what I'm talking about.

[Michael]

Because come on now, I designed it from scratch. I'm an architectural designer. I bought the land, I financed the land, designed it from scratch and I built it from the ground up using all my resources. So proud to come home. I'm pulling up, checking out my Christmas lights. We just put up for the holiday season and there happens to be a lady in the driveway with two kids. So I don't think nothing of it. Kids coming in and out of my house all the time. I got kids, got a family over here. I don't think nothing of it. I don't think she's looking for the front door. I say, hey, are you looking for somebody? She doesn't answer. She then proceeds to go to the porch. So I'm like, okay. So she probably coming over. So I pull in the driveway. I'm about to park, and she rings the doorbell and comes to the front of the front porch and stops me and says, do you live here? And I said, yeah, I live here. She said, well, I don't think so. So I said, well, what are you doing here? She says, I don't think you live here. Picks the kid, kid up, drops the stroller, hops off the porch, starts running. And I hear screaming, yelling for help. At that point now I'm in fear. I'm in fear because I know what we face as black men in America. So I rushed to the garage, park in the garage, come in the house, my wife in the office. I said, babe, some white Caucasian lady, she just jumped off our front porch screaming, yelling for help. I don't know if she gonna call the police. I'm pacing back and forth. I don't know what's about to happen. 6:00pm Regular day, we pacing back and forth. I don't. At this point, I'm like, I don't know what's about to happen. She comes back before the police gets here. I don't want to go outside. I don't want to go outside with them outside. And the police pulls up and we're. I don't know what's going to pop off. If police pull up, altercation happen, anything could happen. I know they're going to try them. So my wife's come outside and she just wants to. Wants to figure out what's going on because she's in shock. And I let her say how she ended up coming outside or whatnot.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay. When he comes.

[Wife of Michael]

Yeah, when he came home and he.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Said, you know, I was going to ask you. He comes into the house, he says, babe, there was a white lady standing on our porch. She's running, yelling, screaming. I don't know what this is about. And so what's going through your mind when he explains what he just encountered?

[Wife of Michael]

I was in my office working, and I'm confused. I'm not understanding what's going on. Like, what do you mean? There's a white woman running through her for help. Coming for help for what? He's like, I don't know. And immediately my. I just heart dropped. I'm like walking and pacing back and forth like, okay, just wait, just wait. Okay, well, what happened? Nothing. I was just pulling in the house and I'm like, what is she screaming for? He's like, I don't know. And I'm like, I feel. What? What? And I Keep opening up the door, because I feel like the police is going to come here. Somebody's about to come here, and I don't know what's going to happen. I don't even know what really happened. I didn't hear. I didn't hear anything. I'm in the house working.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So she go.

[Wife of Michael]

And so I kept opening up the door, and that's when I came out.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So she called. So she did end up calling the police.

[Wife of Michael]

She did end up calling the police.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Okay, so let me ask you a question. Now, this happened in November. The video just recently got released. What caused you guys to release? Because I'm glad this is on ring camera, because you're absolutely right. Had this not been captured on camera, on video, we already know the story that was gonna be told and how it was gonna be spun. But you guys had it on camera. What made you guys finally decide to release it?

[Wife of Michael]

Well, I actually released the video in our community Facebook group. We have a community Facebook group, about 500 or so people. And it. Ever since I've been like. We've been chattered. We've been upset. We've been. It's so many different factors and so many different feelings. So many different feelings. I put the video in our community Facebook group to share what happened, and it took a lot for me to do that. And then we woke up and the video everywhere.

[Guest]

You know, it's funny. It's one thing to experience racial profiling in public. You know, in public. I'm sure we all have stories where it happens in that setting. Well, for it to happen in your own home, I mean, it can be. It can be unsettling. It could be. It could be uncomfortable. Especially when it comes to a place that you call a place of. A place of peace. There we go. We can all get away from, you know, from the outside world. Has that affected your sense of security and trust in the neighbors? And have you reconciled in any way with the neighbor who caused these issues?

[Wife of Michael]

Of course there's a lack of trust. Of course it makes us feel unwelcome and unsafe. We have two boys, and he leads our family. He protects our family. So to know that we can't go walk the dog or someone looking at us is what's going to happen. It's a lot of weight. It's a lot of pain, and it's a lot of emotion.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I can still.

[Wife of Michael]

And he's desensitized to this.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I still hear it in your voice.

[Wife of Michael]

So, of course, not once have we got. I thought the next Day, maybe there would be some flowers at the door saying, not once has this person reached out to us to give us a sincerity apology. I reached out to HOA immediately after it happened.

[Guest]

Nobody said anything.

[Wife of Michael]

Immediately after it happened. HOA ghosted me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow. For lack of better words, can I ask you this? Prior to that night, prior to that incident, had you ever seen this woman prior to this incident?

[Brittany]

Foreign.

[Michael]

I've been in the neighborhood for three years. I built the house from the ground up. I know the developers in the neighborhood. I lived in the front of the neighborhood while I built the house. I walked to the job site every day. So have I seen her eye for eye? No. I've walked by their house and seen them on the front porch.

[Wife of Michael]

So she see when they came, I didn't recognize.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Go ahead, ma'am, go ahead.

[Wife of Michael]

I didn't recognize them. But we. But I was going to say 90%, 90% or more of the neighborhood is predominantly Caucasian. So we're one of one black families in the neighborhood.

[Michael]

And our house sits all the way in the back of the neighborhood and people ride by and take pictures every day. And there's a lot of publicity with our house. So it really was. It was shocking. But they stayed to themselves in the neighborhood.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Let me ask you this. When you walk up and you ask, what can I help you with? And she says, is this your house? You say, yeah. And she says, I don't believe you. When someone tells you they're standing on your porch and they tell that's not their property. And they tell you that this is not your property, what went through your mind when someone is standing on your porch and they say, well, you don't live here.

[Michael]

Well, that's when I was battle tested as a black man, as a man that had been in prison that's had to transition and learn how to put pride and ego to the side and control your emotions, okay? That's when that kicked in. That was the ultimate battle test. Because in my mind I said, the audacity, the audacity of her. That was in my mind. But I had to control my emotions in the moment because I knew where it could have escalated at. I'm thinking, well, what if she had a gun? Would she have been running or would I have been running?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Is this a situation? Because now she said, well, you have to see it from my point of view. No, I don't need to see anything from your point of view when you stand, you know what, on my porch. But for her to say, well, you didn't Say, well, I really live here. I live here. I don't have to identify myself. This is mine. Why do I have to tell you who I am when you standing on my property?

[Michael]

It's. I mean, it's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It took everything out of you, you know, not to get out of character. And especially when they came back, you know, she brought her husband back. He was real standoffish. I was scared to go outside, but I sat on it. I was listening. I said, I can't let my wife sit out here with these people. What if the police pull up? So I went outside, and I just had to make my face numb. And I had to let them know, I do live here. A black man does live here. I did build this house from the ground up. I did design this house. I had to show my face. And as soon as I came outside, you can tell they switched it all the way up. Let's get out of here. Let's go. They switched it all the way up.

[Shannon Sharpe]

When the police arrived, what did the police say? Okay, what was the side of the story that they told the police? And then what did the police. What was the interaction once the authorities arrived?

[Michael]

I hid in the house. I didn't talk to the police. I'm not about to cut my beer with. Dude, those police might dump me down.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So you let your wife.

[Michael]

I hid in the house.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So you let your wife.

[Michael]

I let her handle that. Okay, What I made.

[Wife of Michael]

I mean, I made a report. I made a police report. It was emotional to make a police report because we all know what happened. And you call the police. So I had to think to myself, do I go outside? Do I let him come inside? Do I sit up? Do I stand down? Do I let my son. Do I. Do I let my son be.

[Michael]

Stand here?

[Wife of Michael]

How do I explain this to him? And even explaining and sharing that this lady racially profiled as she ran from our house screaming, there's no telling what people can think. My son came home from work, who's 17, and said, mom, what if I was taking out the trash? What if she had a gun?

[Michael]

What are the.

[Wife of Michael]

Like, what's going on? Why are the police here?

[Guest]

That's crazy. Hey, this.

[Wife of Michael]

But I knew I had to make this.

[Guest]

For despite the difficulties of the situation you've been through, have you guys? Or are you guys moving forward with reclaiming your sense of safety, being that it is home in any way, despite them not giving sincere apologies or letting you know that we welcome you here? In our home, especially HOA and the neighbor itself. Do you still have hope and motivation to keep sharing your story from this point on for others that might encounter these situations in ways they can prevent things from happening and being able to deescalate those situations.

[Michael]

100%. I have nothing against their family, but I grew up dealing with this all the time. So we still have to live here. They live two streets over. We have to ride by each other's house. I'm okay with being cordial with why I invite each other out. Have no issue with them. The issue is getting the word out here and letting my situation and what I've been through and what I overcome be inspiring to people in the world, people that look like me. So that's the space I'm in. And I'm thankful for God because I didn't ask for her to show up on my porch. This is God's movement here. This is God telling me the people need to hear your story. You need to inspire. You need to tell people what's going on and use this so that hopefully this won't happen to the next person or the next person that comes across a caring situation. They will know how to control their emotion. Because us, as black men, especially young black men, we struggle with that. We struggle with that impulse, with that, that acting we have. We think irrationally and we never think rational. So I'm here to inspire people. I'm a real estate developer. I build houses from the ground up. Single family houses. But I thought that moving into the most wealthiest neighborhood in Ohio, that this was the right thing to do. But maybe my focus needs to be building communities that's for us and by us, so that we can inspire people that look like us. We can, we can build a community that for us.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Can I ask you a question? You said something very interesting. You said she lives two streets up from you. So you mean to tell me she went two streets out of her way to try to find out who lived in this home? Not, not, not on your street, not, not on your block, not on your street, not on your block, not next to you. Two streets.

[Michael]

It's two streets up, but it's. She's all the way north. We're all the way down. It's multimillion dollar houses back here. The lots are big, so it's two streets, but it's still. We could go 30 days, 60, 90 days without seeing each other.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So she went out of her way. Let me ask you this. She issued an apology. She also said that she reached out to you and tried to apologize multiple times, but she hasn't had a response from you? Has she tried to, did she try to apologize to you in person or was it through this video that you guys have seen?

[Wife of Michael]

He has not tried to apologize to us in person, via phone, via knock at the door, via a phone call, via email? No, only the live videos.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Now apparently, if we were to believe what the report says, that this woman has a history going back as far as 2018 of creating these situations and then making herself out to be a victim. Have you guys seen that? Have y'all seen any of those reports? Reports that's, that's being circulated?

[Wife of Michael]

I have not seen that.

[Michael]

I have not seen.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Can I ask you this, I want to ask you this. Have you thought about since your privacy, your security, have you thought about potentially even leaving that neighborhood and going elsewhere? Or you said, nah, y'all not gonna run us up out of our home?

[Michael]

100%. I've been in Ohio my whole life and I faced racial discrimination at its highest peak. I'm a stereotype person, Tattoo, dreadlocks. A man that's in the professional world, in the real estate development world that you don't see too many minorities building multi million dollar homes. It doesn't happen here. So we 100 have thought about moving to another state, taking my talents elsewhere, building a community to going places where we could be surrounded by more people that look like us, man.

[Shannon Sharpe]

So let me ask you a question. What was your relationship with the neighborhood? Did you have any interaction with your neighbors? Like to the left of you in the front of you, to the back of you, what's the neighborhood like? I know you mentioned it's a very affluent neighborhood. There's a lot of. There are wealthy people that live there. You mentioned million dollar homes. What's the relationship with you in the community other than with this said individual?

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[Ocho]

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[LifeLock Representative]

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[Michael]

Oh no.

[LifeLock Representative]

I meant those blackout motorized shades. MVP of the room blinds.com made it crazy affordable to replace our old blinds.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Hard to install?

[LifeLock Representative]

No, it's easy. Even you could do it.

[Ocho]

Nice.

[LifeLock Representative]

I installed these and then got some from my mom too. You fly across the country to do the install? Nope. Blinds.com can do it all. All she had to do was pick what she wanted. She talked to a design consultant for free and scheduled a professional measure and install. Look at you hall of Fame, son. Oh, I just picked the winning team. They're the number one online retailer of custom window coverings in the world. Oh, blinds.com is the goat.

[Shannon Sharpe]

The goat.

[Brittany]

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[Michael]

So it's the wealthiest neighborhood and they got a saying that once you reach a certain tax bracket, race doesn't matter That's a lie. So it's a lot. But people say that. People say that. So everybody out here, mo majority people out here, they walk every day. They take pictures of our house. They say hi. You can ask people in the neighborhood. Those people are not friendly. They don't say hi. They don't take too many walks. They don't walk their dogs. They stay in their house. They are staying off. So the neighborhood is friendly, but I don't know about them.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She said something very interesting. Go ahead, Go ahead, ma'am.

[Wife of Michael]

I was just gonna say we participate in community events and, you know, for the most part, the neighborhood is friendly. She posted videos after this happened and the neighbors brought it to us because they picked two and two together. So that's how we even found out that they knew about it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She mentioned to you as you was walking up, you have to see her point of view. She's walking her kids. It's late at night. If you're that afraid, why you out at night walking your kids? If you as afraid as you say you are? Did that cross your mind, like. Well, if you say you're afraid, why you out here in the dark by yourself? You're married, your husband's not with you, and you got a small child. So it can't be that dangerous. You can't be that fearful of your life if you choose at night to walk a child.

[Michael]

It's 6:00 in the evening, it gets dark early. But yeah, we thought about that.

[Wife of Michael]

Of course, I wouldn't be outside walking with. No, no, not at all. Especially if you, you know, have been through things or whatever. Like, I'm not walking at night, period.

[Guest]

That's crazy.

[Wife of Michael]

It's as simple as that. And as soon as someone tell me that's their house, all bets are off. Okay. You know, if you scared, then you walk, walk home.

[Michael]

That's it.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I don't know. I guess I just look at things differently. I've really never walked by somebody's house. Oh, you live here? Oh, definitely. I'm not standing on somebody's porch and asking, is this their home? If they drive up, I'm in the neighborhood, I see somebody in the driveway or somebody on the porch, I throw my hand up, I keep it moving. I'm not going to stand on someone's porch and ask them if they live here. That's none of my concern. That's just me. Maybe. I don't think I'm unique in that. Guys.

[Guest]

Oh, we ain't nosy.

[Michael]

That's pretty.

[Guest]

We Ain't nosy like that though. We ain't nosy like that. Man, we see somebody, man, we chug up the deuce, we say hello and we keep it moving. The first thing they say, we see a nice house. Boy, that thing that nice, ain't it Right? And we keep it moving. It ain't our business.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You mentioned that you have a 17 year old son and as black, we have to have that conversation with our black young men. Is that we always. It's always yes, sir, no, sir, it's yes, ma'am, no, ma'am. When you pull, get pulled over. Look, hey, just be as polite as you possibly can because your job is to get that man or that woman to your car, back to their car and on their way as quick as you possibly can. It's not about, you know, all this and all that. We'll fight it in court, whatever it is. If they said I was speeding, if I was improper lane change, I don't have a tail light or what, erratic driving. Let's go to court. We could argue it in front of a judge in front of 12 people. I can't argue. I gotta have you make it home. Have you had to have that talk with him? Have you had it already or did you have to have that talk with him immediately after this incident?

[Wife of Michael]

Absolutely, absolutely. It was, it was emotional and, you know, it was multiple talk. It was multiple talks. And even with days where it's like, you know what, I don't know if you should go outside and walk our dog.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Right?

[Wife of Michael]

Let me see. Make sure you go out before it gets dark. It's a lot of weight. It's a lot of weight.

[Shannon Sharpe]

You've received a lot of overwhelming support from social media, though. I mean, everybody's been on your side. The social media has come to your defense and like the way you handle it. And you mentioned your situation, having made some decision in your previous when you were younger and you learned and you said, look, I gotta channel this. I'm not gonna give them the ability to say I'm angry and I have every right to be angry because I'm in debt, I'm in the right here. But nobody cares about that because all they're going to look is you as a black man, look at your history and bring that into the equation when it had nothing to do with this woman standing on your porch.

[Wife of Michael]

Exactly.

[Shannon Sharpe]

If you could, people are going to watch this. This is going to get picked up. If you could say, what would you want people to know about you, your family and how you handled this situation.

[Michael]

I'm a black man in America that's overcame every obstacle that could be thrown at you. Growing up, making bad decisions, being around the wrong people and being given a second chance to transition, raising a family, being married. My 17 year old, I've been there since he was six months. This is, this is, this is my, it's my son, but he's not my biological. I've raised him as, he's my son. I have an 8 year old as well. I'm here to inspire people, to show people that. Control your emotion, control your emotion. That's a, that's, that's, that's, that's one of the most powerful things that a man can do because a dangerous man is a man that can't control his emotions. So a situation like this that's broadcasted across the world, you can see that I, I was given every single reason to act and I still control my emotion. So I want to use this moment, these platforms to inspire people, lead people, and to show them what a real man is and what a real man is supposed to do. You take care of your family, protect your family, control your emotions and that's what we're here to do. And also build communities. I want to build houses from the ground up. I want to build communities. I want to design high end luxury homes. These are things that I want to do that I got a passion for. That, My, my, it's, it's in my bloodline. Custom custom home builds. My grandpa was a custom home designer and builder. These are things that I want to take to the next level and be known for and show people that in, in the real estate industry that we can strive, we can survive and we can do what they do and even better. So that's what I'm here for.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Do you have a sense or when, or if you'll ever get your normalcy back because your life has been interrupted? You didn't ask for this, but as you mentioned before, God, don't put on any more of this from what we can handle. He chose you. He chose you for a reason. And the way you handled yourself in that situation, I'm not so sure. A lot of us, because she went out of her way. She had no business on your porch to begin with. If she didn't think you lived there, she could ask that question from the street. You don't bring your tail on someone else's front porch and then ask them. That's not your place. I can see if you were at her house and you asking for direction. You're like, are you lost? Do you need help? She's on your property. Did you think about pressing charges for trespassing?

[Michael]

We did, and they threw it under the rug. They filed a police report that was nothing that we told them. We asked for the police report. They never gave it to us. We had to track them down and get the police report and looked at it. It was vague. We thought about pressing charges. We did all that. I thought she gave me every right. She's on my property. That's self defense. I could have gunned them down, but I had to hold my composure as a man for my family. Because even though it was self defense, it could have been self defense. Not for a black man, not for us.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Wow. The Michael, thank you for sharing your story with us. We really appreciate it. You handle that thing very well. To your wife. What's your name, ma'am? Brittany. You and the Michael handled it very, very well. I'm not so sure very many people would have handled it with the class and with the poise that you did. You did everything right. And even though you did everything right, it seems like everything has gone wrong. She was wrong for coming onto your property. The authorities seem to be wrong for how they've handled this situation. Hopefully, you get the clarity, you get the judgment, the respect that you deserve in this situation because you did everything right. And seemingly, as of right now, things have gone wrong. Hopefully the Nightcap family, everybody that's in this chat, we're praying for you that you get your sense of peace, you get your sense of normalcy, and you get everything that you deserve back tenfold. Because just talking to you, you're a good man, Brittany.

[Ocho]

You're a good woman.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Y'all are great family. Yes. And you're doing the right thing. So I tip my hat to you for the way you handled this situation. And continue to be blessed. God's going to continue to bless you because you're a good man and you do great things for the community. And I want to thank you. Ocho and I, Nightcap family, want to thank you for sharing your story with us. We greatly, greatly appreciate it. This is going to go out and you're going to get an outpouring of support.

[Guest]

Yes, sir.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And it still wouldn't be enough for what you guys went through. But I thank you for sharing your story here with us on Nightcap. Continue to be blessed, continue success, and we'll talk to you soon down the road. Andrew Warren said, best friends tell you what you need to hear not what you want. Not what you want to hear. They do. I've been very fortunate to have those kind of people in my life. O Joe, like I said, I got my two best friends, Bucket and burns on a bucket. Quick to say, homeboy, I love you, but you wrong in this situation. Yeah.

[Guest]

And that's the problem in today's era, too. You got to think about it. Whoever is the golden goose, most of the time, the people around them are. Yes. Men are people that don't have their best interest at heart. Look at some of the incidents that have happened in the NFL in the off season.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Guest]

All season is up for a lot of. A lot of people this year. They're going to be people that get in trouble. They're gonna. They're gonna be people that get in trouble, that have entourages around them that won't tell them, you know what you're getting ready to do. It ain't a good idea. You know what? You've been drinking. You don't need to drive. You know what? I'm gonna drive you home. Matter of fact, we gonna leave the car here. Give me your key. We're gonna take an Uber.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Guest]

You'll see people that don't have their best interest because, you know. You know, if you. If you challenge the person who. Making the money, I mean, it might. He might cut your water off.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Guest]

So everything is a yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yep.

[Guest]

Yes. Not telling them what to do and what's in their best interest. Yeah. Brown really think you should do that by. You know, I love you, but this ain't it. It's different. It is different now.

[Shannon Sharpe]

And that's the thing, Ocho. You're right. You're right. I. I just. For me, it's just. I need to know. That's your job. Your job sometimes is to protect me from me.

[Guest]

Oh, that's a. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. That's a good one there. I got to use that. I got to use that in my next argument. I can use that.

[Shannon Sharpe]

But that's why. But that's why, Ocho. That's why you have. Like, in certain situations, my partner's supposed to protect me, even if I want to. Even if I want to wallow. She's like, hey, yeah, boy. You ain't gonna mess up this money, man.

[Guest]

That's a good line I could use. Like, I'm a deliverer, too. Yes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

She's like, you're not gonna. But I was having an argument. She's like, shannon, let that go right for what? You willing to risk all that over something petty? No, that's what I bought.

[Guest]

I bought you in my life. You know, hoping at some point with what I envision, after explaining my long term goals to you, I see you and visualize you as an asset to me.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yes.

[Guest]

And I'm here to be able to protect me from myself. But this what you want to do?

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah. Don't egg it on.

[Guest]

Right there on that spot right there. When I give that delivery, I'm gonna let a teardrop out the right eye. Cause if a teardrops out the right eye, that let him know you serious.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Yeah.

[Guest]

Hey, boy, I'm ready. I got that set up. I got it right here in my notes.

[Shannon Sharpe]

He had to drop the two point conversion. So he's gonna be. But I. Look, they said that when I used to kill Tony Romo, I didn't like white quarterbacks. I killed Aaron Rodgers. I don't like quarterback. I killed Baker. I didn't like black. White quarterback. If I say something about I don't like black, I hate my own people. So I can think of doing something right. Because y'all say, I don't really like anybody. When Mahomes doesn't play well, I point that out. Have I not pointed out that Mahomes didn't play well? Of course, turnovers help you lose a ball game. My point was people like, well, you didn't like Joe Burrow. It ain't got nothing to do with like I'm saying, his turnovers is costing his team. It doesn't matter how well you play the volume.

[Ocho]

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[Brittany]

Happy new Year from Minky Couture. Cozy up this winter with the ultimate in comfort and style, our original Minky blankets. Whether you're relaxing at home, enjoying a movie night, or simply staying warm on those chilly nights, Minky Couture has you covered. Literally. Choose from our wide selection of luxurious designs, colors and sizes, perfect for everyone in the family. Celebrate the season in warmth and comfort. Visit minkycouture.com or stop by your nearest Minky Couture store today. Minky Couture Blanketing the world in warmth.

[Michael]

And love hey, it's Bobby Bones.

[Guest]

Join me and former NFL quarterback Matt Castle every Wednesday for our new podcast, Lots to say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle. Between us, we have over 17,500 passing yards, multiple New York Times bestsellers, and one mirrorball trophy from Dancing with the Star. So where else are you going to find a show with that much athleticism and football insight? We talk sports, but we talk pop culture and music and a little bit of everything. Listen to Lots to say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Shannon Sharpe]

I'm so sick of hearing men talk about women's basketball.

[Wife of Michael]

This is Lexi Brown and Mariah Rose, and we've got a new podcast, Full Circle.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Every Wednesday, we're catching you up on.

[Michael]

What'S going on in women's basketball.

[Wife of Michael]

We've got you with analysis, inside stories, and a little bit of tea.

[Shannon Sharpe]

Full circle is an iHeart women's sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Full circle on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Brittany]

Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports.