A Little Rage Bait & A Lot of Truth

Summary

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Coffee Convos with Kail Lowry & Lindsie Chrisley

Episode: "A Little Rage Bait & A Lot of Truth"

April 23, 2026 | PodcastOne

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Kail and Lindsie deliver their signature blend of candid conversations and playful banter. The main theme revolves around “hills they’d die on” (unpopular opinions they refuse to budge on), navigating judgments as women in the public eye, their evolving perspectives on relationships, and the realities of parenting and emotional expression. The duo weaves through laughter, vulnerable admissions, wild stories, and honest reflections—all with their trademark synergy.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Live Show Anxiety and Podcast Realness

[02:03–03:06]

• Kail and Lindsie share nerves about friends attending their live shows, worried about their podcast personalities intersecting with “real-life” relationships.
• Kail: “I feel like I’ve done a good job compartmentalizing the way that I say the most unhinged stuff on these podcasts... Then I go out in the world and assume these people have no idea what I talk about…” (02:19)
• They joke about the awkwardness of people knowing their intimate stories.

2. The “Hill I’d Die On”—Rage Bait & Bikini Judgments

[04:08–11:08]

• Lindsie passionately defends women’s right to wear thong bikinis without facing character judgements or being accused of “seeking attention”.
• She critiques social media “rage bait” and male projections:
  • “Just because a grown woman wears a thong bikini does not mean she’s looking for attention... That’s projection.” (05:49)
• Both discuss how men and even other women frequently project their own issues on others’ choices.
• Lindsie shares a personal story of being shamed at Great Wolf Lodge:
  • “A woman passes by me and says, ‘Completely inappropriate bathing suit’... It was high-waisted... Why did you just ruin my time?” (08:28–09:40)
• Kail contends with reactions: “You don’t need male validation to decide to wear certain things, let me tell you.” (08:28)

3. Money & Relationships: Evolving Perspectives on Stability, Love, and Resentment

[15:12–18:24]

• Lindsie admits shifting from thinking she only deserved love from men who could financially provide to preferring equality and stability:
  • “A man who’s financially stable can love you just as much as one who’s not... but I don’t want the one that can’t.” (15:12–17:08)
• She discusses how financial imbalance led to resentment in past relationships:
  • “Once they realize I can do for myself, it’s somewhat of an expectation that I’m going to financially do for all... It almost was like emotionally breaking me down.” (17:32)
• Kail reflects she’s never been with someone who could provide for her financially, contemplating the dynamic’s emotional toll.

4. How Well Do They Know Each Other? – Friendship Quiz

[19:05–24:13]

• Fun back-and-forth quiz: birthdays, pizza preferences (pineapple debate!), favorite school subjects, and study habits.
  • Lindsie: “Pineapple does not belong on pizza.” (19:49)
  • Kail: “I think I graduated high school with, like, a 2.5...” (24:13)

5. Parenting Approaches: Honesty, Rules, and Lying to Kids

[38:18–78:29]

• Who’s tidier, who’s more forgetful, getting lost at the mall (Lindsie!), cooking skills (“bacon ranch chicken” & mac’n’cheese disasters).
• Hilarious tales about enforcing rules with their kids—Jackson caught cheating at board games, sneaking snacks at night, and elaborate parenting “lies”:
  • Lindsie: “If I ask a question... it’s because I already know the answer. I am not wasting my time... You are trapped, so you might as well go ahead and tell me.” (77:35)
  • Kail’s worm consequence: “I told Creed, ‘You know, when you lie, unfortunately worms come out your butt...’” (76:00)
  • On house “security,” Lindsie: “I told him there are cameras in the house... I lied.” (75:10)

6. Emotional Expression: Crying, Compartmentalization, & Coping

[51:28–62:49]

• Who’s more emotional? (Kail) And how that plays out:
  • Kail: “My kids see me cry so often they don’t know what is... Like, I’m just a highly emotional person...” (53:12)
  • Lindsie: “Jackson’s only seen me cry, like, a couple of times... He’ll run to another room and call his dad, ‘Something’s very wrong, mom’s crying.” (52:49)
• They contrast their emotional coping:
  • Kail: “If I can turn my emotions on and off like that, maybe there’s something wrong with me. But on the flip side, I don’t have time... On any given day I have to dry my tears up and keep it pushing.” (59:52)
  • Lindsie: “If something happens, I need about 24 hours to process... And by the time I get to the conversation, you’re probably not going to like what comes out...” (63:09)

7. The Art of Directness & Handling Conflict

[49:19–65:07]

• Lindsie identifies as direct, not people-pleasing:
  • “If you want to be read for filth, Lindsie Chrisley will do it. And she’ll do it in the most professional and English professor way.” – Kail (23:04)
• Kail admits to needing immediate conflict resolution, while Lindsie prefers to process before reacting.
  • Kail: “If someone comes to me and is like, ‘Hey, we need to talk,’ and it’s literally my refrigerator... I’m my brains out in the Wawa bathroom off.” (65:49)

8. Classic “Foul Play” Listener Story

[78:29–82:23]

• A listener submission recounts an epic date fail: lighting a grill, blowing up face/hair, date horrified, yet dutifully stays for dinner.
  • “She says, ‘When I pulled the bobby pins out, the entire section fell into the sink.’” – Lindsie (81:14)
  • “I’m so pissed at that guy for not helping her. I think we should turn it off... You and light the grill off!” – Kail (80:59–81:08)
• The women dissect the “housewife/trad-wife” expectation, and how men often call for skills they don’t possess.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Quote | Speaker |
|---|---|---| | 02:19 | "I feel like I've done a good job compartmentalizing the way that I say the most unhinged stuff on these podcasts..." | Kail | | 05:49 | "Just because a grown woman wears a thong bikini does not mean she's looking for attention... That’s projection." | Lindsie | | 08:28 | "You don’t need male validation to decide to wear certain things, let me tell you." | Kail | | 15:12 | "A man who’s financially stable can love you just as much as one who’s not." | Lindsie | | 19:49 | "Pineapple does not belong on pizza." | Lindsie | | 23:04 | "If you want to be read for filth, Lindsie Chrisley will do it. And she will do it in the most professional and English professor type of way." | Kail | | 53:12 | "My kids see me cry so often that they don't know what is... Like, I'm just a highly emotional person." | Kail | | 52:49 | "Jackson, if I cry... might run to the other room, call his dad and be like, 'Something's very wrong, mom's crying.'" | Lindsie | | 59:52 | "If I can turn my emotions on and off like that, maybe there's something wrong with me. But... I don't have time... I have to dry my tears up and keep it pushing." | Kail | | 63:09 | "If something happens, I need about 24 hours to process... you're probably not going to like what comes out..." | Lindsie | | 76:00 | "I told Creed, 'You know, when you lie, unfortunately worms come out your butt.'" | Kail |

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Tour Anxieties & Podcast Persona: 02:03–03:06
• Hill to Die On/Rage Bait (Bikini Discourse): 04:08–11:08
• Money, Relationships & Resentment: 15:12–18:24
• Friendship/Fun Quiz: 19:05–24:13
• Parenting, Cheating, and Lying to Kids: 38:18–78:29
• Emotional Expression & Coping Styles: 51:28–62:49
• Directness and Handling Conflict: 49:19–65:07
• Foul Play Listener Story: 78:29–82:23

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Tone & Banter

• Unfiltered, playful, irreverent, but honest and occasionally heartfelt.
• Both women balance vulnerability and humor, openly discussing mistakes, insecurities, and their evolving views as parents and women under scrutiny.
• Frequent expletives, spontaneous laughter, and lively energy throughout.

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Conclusion

This episode showcases the unique chemistry between Kail and Lindsie—moving seamlessly between laughter, self-deprecating stories, strong opinions, and unvarnished truths about womanhood, parenting, and personal growth. Their willingness to embrace emotional messiness, poke fun at themselves, and challenge cultural projections offers listeners both relatable insights and cathartic entertainment.

Transcript

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[A]

Hey, y', all, it's Lindsay. I just wanted to hop on here really quick before the episode starts and let you guys know that this was recorded prior to any recent events. So if you're listening and feel like something isn't being addressed, that's simply because of the timing. I'm going to be taking the time that I need to process some of these things and handle it in the right way, and I really appreciate you guys giving me that space and I just appreciate your love and support more than you know. It truly means everything to me. I hate gift giving and receiving.

[B]

Receiving gifts is so weird. What do you say? Thank you.

[A]

This is Coffee Convos with Kale Lowry and Lindsay Chrisley. I really want you to be in your feels. Kayl.

[B]

That does not interest me whatsoever.

[A]

I feel very attacked by you. A spirited discussion about motherhood, friendship, family and life in the public eye. I'm just not with the fakery anymore.

[B]

There's a fakery bakery around here.

[A]

Here's Kale and Lindsey.

[B]

Are we ready?

[A]

Good morning and welcome back to another episode of Coffee Convos podcast. It's me and Kale and our needles and Arnos.

[B]

I got the pink glitter one.

[A]

How you doing?

[B]

Pretty good. Just sending out tour links to everybody so that they can come on tour with us. Like for funsies.

[A]

I love that. Actually, speaking of tour, I got a couple of text messages privately from people who I have not heard from in forever. That was like, hey, I'm going to come to Yalls Atlanta show. And I'm like, can you not? They're like, well, I bought front row

[B]

seats, so this does make me nervous. It does make me because I feel like I've done a good job separating, like I can compartmentalize the way that I say the most unhinged stuff on these podcasts. I can't And I go out in the world in the wilderness, and I assume that the people that know me in real life do not know what I talk about on these podcasts. So then I think, oh, you're gonna buy tickets to my live show. And then I'm gonna be face to face with you while I'm saying some off the wall about doing anal.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

With my ex. Do you know what I mean? So, like in real time, on a day to day basis. I just assume these people have no idea what the I'm doing.

[A]

You know what, speaking of anal, somebody told me recently, they were like, we're gonna get you some, like, balls. Like to try to like loosen it up back there. So it'll work.

[B]

Probably not.

[A]

Do you know anything about that?

[B]

No. Benoit Balls. I do know about Ben. I also know about anal beads, but I just don't know that that would be a pleasurable experience for me.

[A]

There was a person on the crew of Chrisley Knows Best who walked around with bim wall balls and all day, all day long. And I'm like, how tight would that be?

[B]

Yeah, I probably need that pelvic floor.

[A]

Honey, you've got to do Pilates for the pelvic floor.

[B]

I'm gonna try to do Pilates at killer sports. I'll do my best, but I'm gonna come train you. Yeah, count me in.

[A]

Can we talk about a hill that we would die on? So this has to be an unpopular opinion. It's something that we refuse to budge on. So an example would be.

[B]

I'm gonna get really emotionally charged here in a minute.

[A]

And I'm not rage baiting you.

[B]

I'm gonna rage bait everybody and I'm going to flip out.

[A]

An example would be Pluto is a planet.

[B]

No, I have a top.

[A]

Sheets are useless.

[B]

That is true.

[A]

Books should be organized by color, not genre or last name.

[B]

Also no.

[A]

So what's yours?

[B]

Like a one that's not on this list? Yeah, because what I have to say I'm pissed about.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And I don't know if Ike was rage baiting me or not. So. So we're about to get into this and I know Alessandra will back me the up. So, Ike, when you hear this, I hope you eat your words as she's

[A]

looking directly at the camera.

[B]

So I'm scrolling on Facebook yesterday trying to follow a bouncing ball. This is a hill I will die on. So try to follow the bouncing ball and circle it back to I'm dying on this hill. Scrolling on Facebook and you know how they do like the reels that are just for attendance. Like they're to grab your attention.

[A]

Yeah. Kale, I've fell into those reels multiple times, brought up topics on the podcast, and you're like, lindsay, that's rage bait.

[B]

Yes. Or it's AI, which I also have fallen for.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now this specific one, full transparency, full disclosure. I do not know if it was rage bait. I do not know if it was AI. All I know is that it sparked a conversation with Ike that sent me into a tunnel vision spiral that I can never get out of. There was this woman who was with a man. I don't know if it was her man. I don't know if it was her brother. I don't give a. Who it was. It was a man was with her. She was a grown adult in a thong bikini. And if you've ever been to Miami or any other strips where sometimes there are restaurants lining the strip and you come off the beach and you have to walk through the. You have to walk through the crowds of these tables. Right?

[A]

Right.

[B]

Regardless of any of that, I am of the opinion that I do not give a single. If a grown woman wears a thong bikini or not. I don't give a. That does not mean that she's looking for attention. That is because she either feels confident, she feels good about herself. She. It has nothing to do with self respect. It has nothing to do with wanting attention. Now does that. Is that a one size, one size fits all? No. There are women who look for attention, just like there are men who look for attention. But this specific video without knowing details, I argued because he was like, oh, she doesn't respect herself and she's just looking for attention. Why are you assuming she's looking for attention? That's projection. Because you post selfies and you like the attention because you know you look good. So you post selfies or videos of yourself because you know you look good and you're looking for attention. He agreed. I said so you're projecting onto that woman who you're saying is only looking for attention, not that. Just because she's in a thong bikini doesn't mean she's looking for attention. She just wants to feel good about herself. That doesn't. Well, that gives us the right to speak to her to. These are the same women that get mad that they're being. Cat called you.

[A]

Cat called is crazy.

[B]

You don't get to cat. You don't even get to look. That doesn't. Just because someone is walking by in a thong bikini. Does not give the right to a man to look. Control yourself as a man. Control your eyeballs. Look that way. I don't care. And he's like, well, what? We, we can't look? No. Just because she's walking around naked, half naked, whatever, does not mean it's a lack of self respect. Does not mean looking for attention. Does not mean that it is welcoming eyes and comments. Just because you cannot control your self does not give you the right to look or say anything.

[A]

To me, I would tend to agree with everything that you're saying. I also would say people who have an issue with that and it's involving children that maybe take your kids to more kid friendly places. So then you are somewhat controlling the environment that you're putting them in.

[B]

Like I had a friend years ago who did wear a thong bikini to my child's birthday party and I did feel like that was a little bit inappropriate. That had nothing to do in my opinion. I don't think she was looking for attention. I think she was just confident in who she was and she didn't really think about like the surroundings unfortunately. So to me I was just like, whatever, let's just like who she is. But like on a regular day, I don't give a if you wear a thong bikini. If you don't wear a thong bikini, is it something that I would necessarily do? No, but I don't care if somebody else who's a grown adult does it. That does not mean she's looking for attention. She just might feel like she looks good herself. You don't need male validation to decide

[A]

to wear certain things, let me tell you. And I'm gonna find the photo so that we can post it on Instagram. I went to Great Wolf Lodge one time. This was when I was still married. And that was back in the era where I cared what we all looked like collect collectively. Now I just really don't give a. But I, I really cared. And I'm like, okay, I'm going to buy like family matching bathing suits. Like that was the era I was in. So like Will's trunks are going to be the same pattern, my bathing suit and Jackson's gonna have the same trunks as Will. Okay, so we take a photo at Great Wolf Lodge and some woman passes by me and says completely inappropriate bathing suit. Mind you, this was high. Like a high. It was a bikini, but it was like high waisted. The high waisted ones that like completely basically cover your belly and there's like a small gap between I wear top now Was it cheekier than maybe a one piece? Probably, but I don't think it was inappropriate at all.

[B]

Also, there are cheeky one pieces now for sure.

[A]

And it's just like, why did you just ruin my time? Because now I just went back into, like, our little private area, and now I'm crying and feel humiliated because I was just trying to be cute with my family, and now you're in my business.

[B]

But I don't understand why she was saying it was so inappropriate. Because it was a little cheeky?

[A]

Yeah, because it was cheeky.

[B]

Projection. That has to be. That's projection. I remember those days when you did that, and I distinctly remember seeing a picture of you guys at Great Wolf Lodge or Kalahari, something like that. I don't remember the exact bathing suit, but, like.

[A]

And, yeah, my cheeks were out. I'm not saying that they weren't, but

[B]

it also wasn't a thong either.

[A]

No, it was not.

[B]

But to me, I don't know.

[A]

And, like, why are you hurting my feelings?

[B]

That's projection. That is projection. Because she wishes that she could wear that. And I. I don't mean that in a mean way, because she probably doesn't even realize it's projection. The same way that Ike doesn't realize that what he did was projection. What he said was projection. That has to be. She's not happy with her body, and so she felt like she needed to make you feel like you were inappropriate. Well, then, so Ike calls Twiz, and Twizz is like, oh, if she's with her man. No, she's just with her man. She's doing whatever. But if she's by herself, then, yeah, she's looking for attention. What?

[A]

Like, what if she just wanted to look cute with the girls?

[B]

I was just. So I said, I'm gonna talk about this on my. I'm gonna talk about you on my podcast. I'm gonna talk about you on my

[A]

podcast, if you're listening. I. I'm sorry.

[B]

I'm disappointed in advance.

[A]

I'm sorry in advance, y'.

[B]

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Okay. A hill that I will die on. And this has been a current revelation, is that a man who's financially stable can love you just as much as one that's not. And I used to say that one more time, a man that is financially stable can love you just as much as one who's not.

[B]

Yeah, of course.

[A]

But I used to think, and maybe this was like post toxic.

[B]

Lindsay.

[A]

Yeah, And. And also it was post divorce of the only person that's going to love me is someone that's going to financially provide. No, somebody who can love me is maybe gonna love me for what I can bring to the table. And so maybe they have less than or perceive that they have less than what I have. So I was scraping the bottom of the barrel finding somebody who couldn't bring something to the table.

[B]

Hold on. So am I Tracking correctly when I say, okay, so if you are in the dating pool, you thought that dating someone who like, couldn't take care of you financially would look to you to take care of them financially, but, like,

[A]

maybe they could provide more because, like, finances might not have been their thing. Maybe they could provide more like emotional stability because they would have more time to be able to do that.

[B]

And you think now that, now that I've done it.

[A]

Yeah, I, I definitely think that somebody that could provide financial stability or join in providing financial stability can also give me the time and the emotional bandwidth that I'm looking for.

[B]

Wait, so you're saying that someone that can provide financially and can't, they can love you the same? Yeah. You're saying they can, they can.

[A]

But I don't want it anymore. I don't want the one that can't. I'm not saying I need anything.

[B]

No, no, of course, of course, of course. I didn't take it that way.

[A]

What I found, I'm just like really

[B]

trying to pick my own brain about that. Specifically. I've, I've never been with someone who could provide for me financially.

[A]

What I found through experience and through experimenting.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Is that. And maybe it can work for other people. I'm just saying for me, I have had multiple situations that once they realize that I financially can do for myself, then it's somewhat of an expectation that I'm going to financially do for all. And it makes me feel like, okay, you're only in this for that. Which I thought I was, I was more in it for. Okay, because they can't bring something financially to the table. They can emotionally, like, help. But I realized that because they weren't financially bringing anything to the table and then taking from me that it all almost was like emotionally breaking me down because I was like, oh, is that all I'm worth? Does that make sense?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I built resentment in two relationships post divorce. And it's like I was looking at that person and it's like, yes, I have fun with them and we get to go on these trips and we get to do this stuff and they're always there. But then I'm building resentment on the back end because it's like, okay, well, we're only doing these things because I'm providing to do these things and would we be doing this stuff and having this much fun if I didn't do it? But moving, moving on from that, we are going to go a little more light hearted on how well do Kale and I actually know each Other. When is my birthday?

[B]

September 17, 1989.

[A]

March 14, 1992.

[B]

Yeah. Solid.

[A]

Yes. You questioned it. She's like, wait a minute.

[B]

If I ordered a pizza, huh? What toppings would I put on it and would I be able to finish it on my own?

[A]

A pizza. What toppings would you put on it? Trying to think. The last time that we ordered pizza together would have been at the Webbies.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Last year maybe. Pepperoni.

[B]

Yeah. I'm not super picky about my pizza toppings. I'll do just cheese. I'll do meat lovers. I'll do pepperoni. I'll do pineapple and whatever.

[A]

See, that's a hill that I will die on. Pineapple does not belong on pizza.

[B]

It's like a sweet and savory kind of.

[A]

I know, but you have to like sweet and savory, and I don't.

[B]

I love all.

[A]

I mean, I like sweet and then.

[B]

But not together.

[A]

But not together.

[B]

I'm a big sweet and savory together.

[A]

Together.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

If you were to order a pizza, I would say, yeah, like maybe pepp. Pepperoni. A pepperoni pizza. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Or chi. Or just like a plain cheese. But I don't really like anything, like, extravagant.

[B]

I'm not like a huge. Like, I'm not gonna do like a. What is it? Like the Everything Supreme. I'll. If there's a Supreme, I'll eat it. But it's not something that I'm gonna order on purpose. Does that make sense?

[A]

The next part of the question is, would I be able to finish it

[B]

on my own three years ago? Yes, I Would you? No.

[A]

I can eat a large. And I can have proof of this. I can eat a large Domino's thin crust pepperoni pizza by myself.

[B]

I think I could eat a Domino's pizza by myself, but like a pizzeria style pizza.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

I also, for some reason, I don't know, what if it's the Adderall or whatever? I don't really finish anything at this point. I'm also a picker. So, like, I want to go to a restaurant and order five things and pick a little bit of everything.

[A]

See, that drives me nuts.

[B]

I love it. I. It's hard because financially it's not great.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But that's what I do.

[A]

Do you have a rule when you go out to eat with your kids?

[B]

We don't go out to eat.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Fast food only.

[A]

Oh, fast food only.

[B]

I mean, the older two I'll bring out to eat, like, we went to Olive Garden before spring Break so that Elliot and Lincoln could hang out before spring break. But I don't take Lux and Creed. Very hit or miss on restaurants. I have never taken the babies to a restaurant.

[A]

Still haven't taken them. Okay, so I have a rule with Jackson that on the weekends, if we go out to a restaurant to eat, then you can get your meal and a dessert. We're not doing that, like, through the weekdays. And then for vacation, you can order an appetizer, your entree, and a dessert.

[B]

Yeah, I like that.

[A]

But, like, we're not doing that every single meal all the time. I feel like it sets unrealistic expectations.

[B]

I would agree.

[A]

What school subject was I best at?

[B]

You work best at? What are this? Math, science, English, and social studies. I feel like math is not one.

[A]

Can you say I can't add?

[B]

I was not good at math. Were you good at math?

[A]

No,

[B]

I just said math is not it, and she got offended. I feel like you could write, so I'm gonna say English language arts for sure. Okay. I could see that. Because I. For those of you who don't know, there have been times in the past where I have sent things to Lindsay to, like, help me fine tune a little bit because she's very quick witted and has a. Like, when she has a minute to actually look at something and type it out. I mean, you're very good with your words, especially in, like, writing.

[A]

Don't try to get a scathing email for me, because I am not the one.

[B]

Oh. If. If you want to be read for filth, Lindsay Chrisley will do it. And she will do it in the most professional and English professor type of way. Oh, it's good.

[A]

With all due respect, regards, Lindsay Chrisley. Yeah, I'm gonna say that Kale was probably best at social studies.

[B]

I'm gonna be honest. I struggled in school a lot.

[A]

I was gonna say my best subject was P.E.

[B]

okay. But I don't know about you, but, like, when you look back at schooling, yeah, school was not hard for me. I just didn't have the focus and the dedication to, like, I was the same. Take notes so well, and then never study them, Never look at them at home. And then I would fail the tests. So, like, I was present, but I would not absorb information just from the lecture. And I'm talking about, like, high school and also college. I would have to actually study the material, and it takes me a long time once I have it. And I said, like, today, if I was to go back to school, I would be fine. But at that time I was undiagnosed, unmedicated, and I was not getting done. Like, I think I graduated high school with, like, a 2.5.

[A]

Oh, so did I. I think mine was, like, less. Like, maybe a 2 2.

[B]

Like, mine was. I wasn't probably getting into attendance was horrible. Like, it was bad.

[A]

Oh, no, Mine also was. Was very bad.

[B]

But then I made dean's list in college because I don't like folk. I don't know if it was just, like, the dish. I don't know.

[A]

Are we sisters?

[B]

Yeah. Like, how are you my dad?

[A]

No, I. High school, I feel like, was really hard for me. Elementary school, I think it's just because we moved around a lot. I'm going to contribute to some of that. Now, listen, anything that was, like, from memory, so remember, like, times tables, tests, like, I could do those and, like, speed through those. But I also think, like, back in the 90s, you know how we had to. And they don't do this in school anymore, but it's like, you had to write out sentences for memory. Did y' all do that?

[B]

I don't know where.

[A]

It's like, you have to write such and such like, five times. Did y' all do that? Yeah. And so I feel like that helped me. Like, like, the repetition helped. They don't do that anymore in school. And I'm like, well, what are y' all doing? And how are you learning? And is that why all of our kids are medicated?

[B]

Okay, random, but I've been in this phase of my life where I want to look like I have it all together, even if I absolutely do not. And you guys know that. But let's be honest. The routine sometimes takes longer than five minutes, and if it does, it's not happening. That's why Merit Beauty believes great makeup should be effortless. And I recently started using. I probably started using Merit last year. They have clean, thoughtfully curated essentials to help you get a fresh, polished look in minutes with products you can actually swipe on, blend with your fingers, and move on with your day. That is so easy for me. This week, I have a crazy week. I'm in Philly and New York all in one week, and I. This is what I'm thriving on is Merit. It's going to be amazing. I cannot wait. Merit is a minimalist beauty brand that makes elevated makeup and skin care designed to help you look put together in minutes, which, you guys know. I have seven kids. Sometimes I can't do it all. Merit's bestsellers are proof that less really is more. I just started using their flush bomb. It gives you that natural, healthy glow without overdoing it. One was sold every 30 seconds in 2024. That's how good it is. So we should do that again for them in 2026. And then there's the minimalist, which works double duty on both a foundation and a concealer so you can get quick coverage without layering on a bunch of products. But the best part of all is that Merit's products are clean, vegan, cruelty free, and made with nourishing skincare ingredients that leave your skin looking better long after taking your makeup off, which makes a huge difference. Like, I want to be just as confident without makeup as I am with makeup. Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their signature makeup bag with their first [e-mail] that's merit beauty.com to get your free signature makeup bag with your first order. Meritbeauty.com this is a paid message from GoFundMe. Meet Juan Naula.

[A]

When his son was hospitalized for a viral infection, Juan started a GoFundMe to pay for medical expenses. It was 5k to pay the bill for my son and I need only 22 hours. It was amazing people. People really trust on GoFundMe. How did Juan raise $5,000 in less than a day? He posted a short video on GoFundMe telling his story in 30 seconds. 30 seconds. Be specific. Be quick and tell what are you gonna be using the funds for. I was nervous to do it because it doesn't feel okay to ask money. But you shouldn't be nervous. Sometimes you just have to do it and see the results. We were able to save my son's life thanks to gofundme that we still

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All I know is I had enough wits about me in school that I needed Cs. Get degrees like that's what I was striving for. When I look back on my high school career, I wish I would have tried harder.

[A]

Career is crazy.

[B]

What is it to say career?

[A]

My high school career, my high school career.

[B]

It's four years of my life. But, like, I remember going to my different Kristen. Not the Kristen that you guys know, but like my friend Kristen from high school. She was just kind of naturally smart. So, like, she could listen to what the teacher was saying in class and then do the questions at the end of a chapter and then do, oh,

[A]

no, see, that was not me.

[B]

That was not me. I would have to do it over and over and over again. And I remember the last little bit of ninth grade. This was around the time where my mom had gotten out of rehab and I didn't know about it. I was just kind of floating around like, people's houses after school to just go to school and then to finish the year out where I was until I got kicked out, of course. But that. That end of the year, all I had a D or an F in science and I needed to get it to a C because I was going to then transfer schools. Well, I didn't know that at the time, but I'm like, I just need to get a C. Like, that's all I could strive for. So I remember her helping me study for that one class to bring, like, a test score up so that I would end it with, like, either I had an F and I needed a D, or I had a D and I needed a C. But, like, now I look back and I'm like, if I just listen to the teacher one time, I would know. Did you just hear what you said? When I was in ninth grade and my mom left me and I didn't know that she was out of rehab. I was staying at people's house. You can't learn and your brain cannot function when you're being neglected like that. You have so much else to think about and worry about that your brain cannot go to school and learn. Oh, well, like, now that you say it like that, that makes sense to me. Yeah, that's not your fault. Because, like, I think back because I'm like, I'm not. I'm really not dumb. I'm not a naturally smart person. But, like, if you give me some stuff, I can figure it out. You know what I mean now? But then I couldn't.

[A]

I can tell you I never really struggled in elementary school and middle school. I never really struggled with my mom being absent. I started noticing it when I was in high school, like, when I started my period and, like, those years you

[B]

started your period in high school?

[A]

I started my period the summer going into ninth grade. Yeah. Why? You were way earlier.

[B]

I started my period this summer going into seventh grade.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[B]

The last day of school, of sixth grade, I started my period.

[A]

Yeah, I. I started 12 years old, very late. I remember we went to my mom's for a weekend, and I actually started my period while I was with my mom. And I was so grateful because I'm like, if not that my dad wasn't capable of being able to handle that. I think it was just a situation of, like, how do I tell my dad I'm bleeding from my vagina and he's going to tell me I cannot use a tampon?

[B]

Why would he say, you can't use a tampon?

[A]

Oh, girl, that's a long, slippery slope. Like, you're going to lose your virginity if you use a tampon.

[B]

Wait, so I'm very open about, you know, already I'm open about my period to even my boys, especially because I'm a heavy bleeder, and if I go out in public and I'm bleeding, I would want them to 1 know what to look for, what it is, and how to help. So not too long ago, it was probably like a month ago. So Rio has transitioned from his crib to his toddler bed. I don't know the timeline on that, but he transitioned before this happened. I say that to say I have to lay with him at night now because he's in an open bed. It's not a crib, and he wasn't going to sleep. And I said, rio, I. I have to go take a shower. I'm bleeding, like. And I had bled through my clothes, and I could tell, okay, mommy, next time I go to lay with him, he was worried about me needing to leave to go shower, and he looked at me and he said, are you bleeding out your butt? He.

[A]

See, I. I love that about your parenting. And it's a mark that I think I missed that I wish I could go back. Like, if I could say something to go back in my parenting journey to maybe have a conversation about that, it would. It would be periods and being open and honest about those conversations, because it's always been something that I hid. But then I take it all the

[B]

way back to your own childhood.

[A]

My own childhood, you know, and so, yeah, I just didn't know what the level of appropriateness was, was for that. Okay, next question. What is my all time favorite movie.

[B]

Oh, your favorite movie. It's. I have it on the tip of my tongue. It's with a guy. And the guy's name is. Give me a hint. Give me the name. It's a. It's a guy. And you said he was so hot, and I didn't think he was hot.

[A]

Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson.

[B]

You think Owen Wilson is hot?

[A]

No, but his personality is.

[B]

No, it's a movie. And you said that you loved it and you thought the main character was so hot. It was like this, like, older white guy, and you were like, in his

[A]

youth, like Hugh Grant.

[B]

What movie was he in?

[A]

No, who. Who's the lead of Pretty Woman? Richard Gere.

[B]

Who does he play? He plays in Pretty Woman. So then it's Pretty Woman or what is it?

[A]

I do not have an all time favorite movie. It was a trick question.

[B]

Oh, but I know you like Richard Gere.

[A]

I love Richard Gere. Like, if he was. And I know this is gonna sound gross. Let's give me a little bit of grace. I would sleep with Hugh Grant right now.

[B]

Let me google him.

[A]

Because Hugh Grant or Richard Gere, like, absolute hall passes.

[B]

That's true. Fatherless behavior.

[A]

That is fatherless behavior.

[B]

Hugh Grant, as in. Well, didn't he play in Hannibal Lecter?

[A]

Well, I mean, I don't think I want him as Hannibal Lecter.

[B]

Wait, did he. I might be making that up.

[A]

No.

[B]

Liver spots and all. You're gonna have sex with this man? Not the liver spots.

[A]

What's liver spots?

[B]

It's just the first picture.

[A]

What's liver spots? And why are you going to the first photo? I'm talking 90s Hugh Grant. Get the out of here. If right now, at my age, from the era that I liked Hugh Grant in.

[B]

Okay, I was. I was confusing.

[A]

Okay, 1990s Hugh Grant.

[B]

No, Richard Gere was never hot.

[A]

Yes, he was.

[B]

Mustache.

[A]

Can I ask you for a mustache ride?

[B]

Okay. I could see this. I could see him in his younger years being a fine young man, but.

[A]

Fine young man.

[B]

Who did I think was but an old man?

[A]

You know, like at the time when, like, if I'm 36 right now, and I could transport back to the 90s as a 36 year old person. Absolutely. All day long.

[B]

Yeah. I definitely confused Hugh Grant with Hannibal. Whoever's in Hannibal Lecter.

[A]

So I love that. Okay, so top favorite movies for me of all time, Pretty Woman, period. Missed out Fire and the Breakup.

[B]

I don't think I've seen the breakup. What's that one?

[A]

It's with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston.

[B]

Oh, yeah, I have seen that one. I do like that one.

[A]

Yeah, it's a goodie.

[B]

Mine would be 10 things I hate about you.

[A]

That's really surprising.

[B]

Yeah. And then I'm going after that, probably Cinderella.

[A]

Like, Cinderella, as in, like, cartoon.

[B]

The original.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[B]

And then I'm going, coach Carter.

[A]

Coach Carter.

[B]

Or 12 years. 12 years of slaves.

[A]

I'm really surprised that you didn't say the Eminem movie.

[B]

Oh, my God. Eight Mile. No, let me take this back.

[A]

Hold up, hold up,

[B]

hold up. Top two, ten things I hate about you in eight mile, then Cinderella and then Coach Carter. Love that. 12 years of slaves.

[A]

Okay, we're gonna play a new game. We're gonna mix this up.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We are going to play. This is the instructions of the game. Each player has to write on their whiteboard who they think that the answer aligns with most. And the question has to start with who is? So the first one is, who is the better cook?

[B]

Lindsey is the better cook for sure.

[A]

Okay. I will say that kale probably makes one mean recipe that I don't even know what it is, but it's like cream cheese spaghetti. And I feel like it's the only meal that kale knows how to make.

[B]

I do bacon chicken, ranch bacon chicken, bacon Alfredo. I can also do good chicken cutlets.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And I'm working on the Mac and cheese recipe. I did Teeny from Tick Tock's recipe again over the weekend. And this one I did. I followed it exactly before. I kind of, like, was mostly following it. This time, I followed it exactly with the gouda cheese and the paprika. I learned very quickly with that recipe after making an entire pan of it that I am not a stuff smoked girly. I do not like the flavor of smoked. I do not like smoked Mac and cheese. I do not want it to taste like it belongs with the barbecue chicken. I am not a fan.

[A]

Oh, I love that. Okay. I am really good at following a recipe to a tea. What I'm not good at is making up recipes like, as I go. And I think that is the definition of an actual good cook. Somebody that can cook something from not a recipe.

[B]

I agree. And I'm not that girl.

[A]

Okay, next one. Who is tidier?

[B]

Lindsay. Lindsay said me.

[A]

I said kale, like, tidy your. Where I just feel like, okay, I definitely give off, like, a type A personality. But at any given time, you could go into my laundry room and there's shit everywhere. At any given time, you could go into my bedroom and not organized, my closet clothes thrown everywhere. I think the average person that listens to this podcast would think that all of my stuff would just be like pristine and I like it like that. But I am not tidy like that.

[B]

I wish that I was more tidy than I am. I am an aspiring type A. Yeah,

[A]

but aspiring doesn't get us there. Oh, type C. Is that the combination of A and B? Oh yeah, that's definitely what we all are. All right y', all, let's take a quick second to talk about Chime. I love Chime so much and Chime is changing the way that people bank. They offer the most rewarding fee free banking. This is fee free. This is fee free banking built for you. And they are not like traditional old banks that charge you overdraft and monthly fees. They have thousands of fee free ATMs and why should we be paying to get our own money? It is built to for you, not the 1%. Chime members can benefit from up to $1,150 in annual rewards. Fee free direct deposits unlock the most rewarding way we bank at Chime. And Chime is rated five stars by USA Today for customer service. So real humans 24. Seven, you're not just switching banks, you're upgrading to America's number one choice for banking with a Chime checking account. Get 5% cash back on Chime card and a category of choice like gas groceries you savings that grows faster with a 3.75% APY. So that's 9% higher than the national average. And plus you get premium travel perks like airport lounge access and 24. 7 travel concierge included with your time card. You can even get up to $500 of your pay. When you say with my pay they also have Spot Me which lets you overdraft up to $200 fee free. My younger self would have totally benefited from this when I was in college and starting my adult life. Chime is smarter banking. It is the most rewarding way to bank join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to Chime.com Coffee Head to Chime.com Coffee that's Chime.com Coffee it only takes a few minutes to sign up. Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services, a secured Chime Visa credit card and my pay line of credit provided by the Bancor Bank NA or Stride Bank NA. My pay eligibility requirements apply and credit

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[A]

Life can feel like a big puzzle. You're constantly trying to fit all of the pieces together, like your career, your passions, your relationships, your finances, and of course your health care. And Kale and I can very much relate to all of these aspects and it can feel like a lot. But finding care should not be the trickiest piece to fit but finding care shouldn't be the trickiest piece to fit into everything else that is going on and Zoc Doc makes easy to find and book an appointment with a doctor that you will love. I have used ZocDoc many times and if you have never heard of ZocDoc, ZocDoc is a free app and website that helps you find and book high quality in network doctors so that you can find someone that you love. So we're talking about booking in network appointments with more than 150,000 providers across 50 states. So whether you're looking for a dermatologist, a dentist, primary care, eye care, or any of the other 200 plus specialties offered on Zocdoc, you can easily search by specialty or symptoms to build a care team that is right for you. And if you want to see your doctor in person, that's great. Or if you prefer a video visit, you can do that too. I've actually done both using Zoc Doc with thousands of verified patient reviews to give you a real sense of who your doctor is. Maybe they hate small talk just as much as you do, or root for your sports team. Whatever it is, you can feel confident that you can book with a doctor that you know that you will love. And when you're ready, you can see their real time availability and click to book instantly. So no phone tag, no waiting around because that is the absolute worst. Appointments made through Zocdoc happen so fast, typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking. You can even score same day appointments. Zocdoc is so great. So this is your sign to stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to Zocdoc.com convos to find and instantly book a doctor that you love today. That's Z.com convos Zoc.com convos thank you Zoc Doc for sponsoring this message. Okay, next one who is more forgetful? Oh Kale Says me and her. And I said Kale.

[B]

I would agree that it's.

[A]

We've thought that Kale's had, like, Alzheimer's for years.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Okay. Who is more likely to get lost? Definitely. I am more likely to get lost. Alistair. Alessandra is shaking her head yes. I couldn't.

[B]

In Ohio. You got lost in the mall. The mall.

[A]

Listen, first of all, when did you

[B]

go to the mall? You went to the mall in Ohio.

[A]

I just get lost.

[B]

We were together.

[A]

I know, but, like, we weren't.

[B]

Why did you go to the mall on the way to the venue?

[A]

I don't know. I don't know, but I can anywhere. I don't think I was. I think I was just lost. I was just. I was lost. I could get lost in.

[B]

What's the saying? Not all that. Not all who. Not all who wanders.

[A]

Wait, what's the saying? Not all who are law. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Not all who wonder are lost.

[A]

That is me. But I am so bad at geography. Is that what it is? And also, like, forgetting where I'm at and, like, what I'm doing. So I could be at Target, for example, and I'll be going down the aisles, and I'll be doing really good for a minute, and then I black out, and it's like, what am I here for?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And, like, why am I at Target?

[B]

Okay. Sounds. Sounds like me, you know? Yeah, for sure.

[A]

So maybe that is also forgetful or Alzheimer's.

[B]

Either one.

[A]

Or that. But why was I at a mall in Ohio on tour, and I was not buying anything. I was just lost. Okay.

[B]

Okay. Not all who wander are lost.

[A]

Who is the better kisser? How would we determine this?

[B]

Make out and scissor. Becky and I did it, so I guess it's.

[A]

We have to do that.

[B]

We did make out on the podcast. No, no.

[A]

I'm like, what happened last week? Oh, it pride this year?

[B]

No, it was 2016.

[A]

2016. Did Becky think that you were a good kisser?

[B]

Probably not.

[A]

Did you ask her?

[B]

No, because I don't want to hurt my own feelings.

[A]

Can I ask her? I'm calling Becky.

[B]

I hope she says she doesn't remember, because I'll be really embarrassed.

[A]

I feel like that would definitely be something that Becky would remember, you know? Hey, Becky.

[B]

Hey.

[A]

I have a question for you. Kale and I are playing a game at who's better at stuff, and we got to the one who is the better kisser. And you and kale kiss in 2016. Is this correct? That's Correct. What do you have to say about Kale's experience with kissing? Like, is she really good at it? Is she, like, mediocre? You're also on air, so, you know, I don't know if there is a world that any answer that I give to this is going to be a good answer, because I quite honestly don't remember.

[B]

Thank God.

[A]

The quality of that.

[B]

That.

[A]

But also, like, not very intentional or not. But it was like. Like, it was like.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Like, why were you all doing that? I don't think that I'm subject to give my. Like, she's probably a great kisser, but, like, I'm not the one to make

[B]

that judgment, you know? Thank you. I really appreciate.

[A]

Was it a pet kiss or no? Is it like.

[B]

I don't even remember Becky. We made out with tongue.

[A]

It was all it was. Was evidently made way more impactful to Kale's life than it was to yours. She's like, it was tongue, but it wasn't like some. What it was. It was like, quit. It wasn't even like. Like, you know, it was like a quick one and done.

[B]

So the answer to this question is actually Becky, not Lindsay or Kale.

[A]

I think we need to pick a neutral target, and then the three of us get to make out with them, and then they get to choose who the best maker outer.

[B]

You're not in the equation because you would be the winner, so you can't be in the equation.

[A]

But who's the target?

[B]

We have to find somebody that we're both, like, mutually attracted to.

[A]

Okay. Love you. Love you.

[B]

Bye.

[A]

Be good. Bye.

[B]

Be good.

[A]

Okay, next one more likely to snooze their alarm. Both of us. Bill said herself. I said me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. I have to set multiple alarms so, like, five minutes apart. And it's not like the snooze feature. So, like, one snooze might be going off, and then the next one set for, like, six minutes later. So that's like, a minute later, that one will start going off, and then I'll eventually get up, like the fourth time. You know what I mean?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Love that. More adventurous Kale.

[B]

Definitely. Me, for sure.

[A]

Next one more honest. I don't know if that's a fair question, because honest is not the way

[B]

that I'm taking that, because I don't think that either of us are liars.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And if I have, you're hearing it here first, because I did see a tick tock recently, and it was like, I think I caught Kale in a lie.

[A]

Oh, I saw that one.

[B]

It was literally about drinking and the night I conceived Rio. And it's like. Like, if I've ever lied, it was never intentional. It was just that I forgot. And I will always. If I then remember or someone reminds me, I will always go back and be like, oh, I'm so sorry. Like, I completely forgot. And then I remembered. You know what I mean? Like, I'm not intentionally lying. So I feel, like, honest for me, when you read that is more, like, direct. Like, more direct.

[A]

I think that's the better question.

[B]

More direct. Like, it's like, okay, how does this outfit look? Look. Who's going to be more honest about it? Where I might be a little bit of a people pleaser versus, like, I'm

[A]

trying to, like, fake. Like, I'm writing because you're like, me, me. I feel like I am a very, like, direct.

[B]

And I said that earlier. I literally said, like, you're like. It surprises me that the one you were talking about missing flights.

[A]

Well, it's also like, for example, if Kale got a text from someone and it just, like, like, pissed her off, she might do one of two things. She might not respond to it immediately or ever. Or she might be like, oh, like, I didn't know that you felt that way. Like, I totally. Like, that's not what I meant by blah, blah, blah. And me, my response is two words.

[B]

You. Yes, that is correct.

[A]

Like, that's the it end of the sentence. Put a period on it.

[B]

Someone did a tick tock about something and I. Taylor sent it to me and I. I typed out a whole DM to him. But then I was like, this would not be best if I sent this. So I typed it all out and then I deleted it. So, like, I'm trying to avoid making those mistakes because I will regret.

[A]

I do feel like it is a learned behavior to govern yourself and not be responsive. Right. Because I do think the natural impulse is to respond and give somewhat of an immediate answer, but everything does not need an immediate answer. And I'm saying that as an impulsive person. I will just tell you you and mean it.

[B]

And then I will say you and not mean it.

[A]

I know. And I. I will ride that forever. Like, I've done it to Will before. And he's like, I'm not talking to you until you apologize. And it's like, well, you're. Then you're never talking to me again because I'm sorry, what I said so is not coming. Because I thought about what I said before I said it. Therefore, I would be lying if I'm apologizing for something that I'm not sorry for.

[B]

I love that for you.

[A]

Okay. Who is more emotional? We both said kill.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

But I think that people. The average person that has, like, watched us over the years together, if people were debating between Kale and I, I think they would say I was the more emotional one. It kind of goes with, like, my aesthetic. I don't feel like I'm really that emotional. Like, it takes me a lot. Like, I could go through, like, a full blown breakup, divorce, indictment.

[B]

Speaking from experience, Lindsay. Or.

[A]

And never cry.

[B]

Truly, where I'm crying every day.

[A]

Day, every day. But what is. What is worse?

[B]

I took.

[A]

I think I'm worse because I think crying is so healthy.

[B]

Yeah. But I just can't. Like, I took Elliot and Lincoln to dinner the other night, and we started talking about. Elliot had to read a book about the Holocaust. And so we were on the subject of the Holocaust and telling him about the nightingale. All the things I just start crying in the middle of Olive Garden. I'm crying about the Holocaust.

[A]

Don't get it. Started with Anne Frank, I'll start crying. That is one area of life that

[B]

Lincoln looked at me and he goes, you're about to start crying, aren't you? And then here goes the waterworks. And I'm like, I'm literally an Olive Garden. Can we change the subject?

[A]

It's so crazy that you say that, because Jackson, if I cry, he's only seen me cry, like, a couple of times in life. And if I cry, he might run to the other room, close the door and call his dad and be like, something's very wrong. Mom's crying. Because it's not like a normal.

[B]

That if you cry, it's really serious. Yeah.

[A]

Like, it's really bad.

[B]

I mean, I almost feel like that is better for the kids. And I'm gonna tell you why. My kids see me cry so often that they don't know what is. Like, I'm just a highly emotional person, but that doesn't mean that it's not important. Like, certain things I'm gonna. Are important, and they're worth crying over. And I don't want my kids to ever be like, well, mom was dramatic. And then they. I don't know what weight to put with certain things. Does that make sense?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So, like, I kind of need to rein back my emotional.

[A]

I don't know, though, because I've. There's like, two sides of that coin. I think for Jackson, for him to like literally run to another room and possibly like text his dad and be like, hey, something's really wrong with mom. She's crying. Because it's so rare that that happened. Maybe that's not good because I hold so much inside. There's not things that there are things that happen that make me want to cry.

[B]

But you don't actually cry. Okay, let's talk about Roboti because everyone is talking about GLP1s and we all know that they can really help people. But if you're interested in this and your overall health journey, Robot could be a perfect fit. They have GLP1s for anyone on their weight loss journey. With 100 online care, access to clinically proven FDA approved medications, and free insurance checks. They also have side effect management, dosing support and so much more. And if you just want to try it to check it out to see if your insurance covers it, check out

[A]

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[B]

That's so interesting. I would be curious to know if my kids understand like, like when I'm crying over like, little. Like, I watch a puppy adoption commercial and cry. Like, I wonder if they know. Like. Like, mom's just, like, really in touch. Or if she's like. If they're like, no, mom's a crazy person.

[A]

I would say that's more emotionally in tune.

[B]

Rio is three, and we talk about, like, I cried about Elliot and the honor society, and I think it was that or it was something else that was good. And Rio was, mommy, are you crying? And I said, they're happy. So now he. He that all it took was that one time, and now he'll be like, are you sad or is it happy tears? So, like, he's not sure. So he's, like, trying to figure it out. Verse and Valley don't give a if I'm crying. They do not give one single, actually,

[A]

because it happens so often. They're just like, there she goes again.

[B]

Creed is hit or miss. Creed's hit or miss. Lux and Lincoln are so in tune with me crying and Will, like, they don't even. They don't. They don't ask why usually, but if they see me crying, they know that it's. It's something. And so they'll put their arm on me. They'll hold my hand. They won't ask any questions, but they'll, like, like, comfort me.

[A]

That's so sweet. Yeah, it's so. Because you have so many kids, you have so many different experiences that I don't have. Only have the one to go off of. But, like, I can think of something that I went through most recently. And then Jackson will, like, if he's at wills, he might. On the phone call that he has with me, he'll be like, well, is this something you're gonna cry about? Oh, and it's almost like, if I tell him, no, it's not something that I'm gonna cry about. He knows it's not, like, that serious. But if he knows that I'm gonna cry, then he's like, okay, this is really bad.

[B]

I think, honestly, there's, like, pros and cons to both, for sure. Yeah, I think there's pros and cons to both, because I, like, I do worry now that we're talking about it. Like, I don't want them to feel like I'm so dramatic. I was always crying. It just really.

[A]

When I am around Kale, I feel like her emotional state can go from, like, she's crying, and then she snaps out of it, and then she's just back to, like, regular, even kill. And then sometimes when she's not on her medicine, that's like a different Kale. I feel like I'm pretty even across the board, pretty much at all times.

[B]

Yeah, there was a. Well, obviously my depression, which. Obvious. That's like a literal mental illness. But there was last year when we were going through the Elijah breakup stuff. It was like. Like, that was the only focus. There was no other version of Kale. It was just that no meds could have fixed that. I don't think think, but, like, now, you know, before we started recording, I, you know, had a little breakdown about something that has nothing to do with work. And then I said, that's. I looked at Alessandro and I was like, okay, I'm done crying for the week about that. And then try to move on. So it's like I'm. I'm trying to rein it in. Like, just try to, like, compartmentalize, but it's hard.

[A]

But I wonder if people who are more emotionally like you are, where they can just, like, dry the tears and then pick up and move on in the same day. Because when I cry, it's like, that is my task for the day.

[B]

Like, you're crying.

[A]

Like, I'm crying, and there's no stopping it. And it's gonna keep coming until it's gone, until I literally have no more tears to cry.

[B]

I think, like, that specifically, and I said this about Elijah. I'll say it about the situation that you guys know that I'm in right now is like, I don't have a choice. Like, I. Because part of me is like, okay, well, maybe I'm mentally ill, because if I can turn my emotions on and off like that, like, maybe there's something wrong with me. But on the flip side of it is, like, I don't have time because on any given day, I have to dry my tears up and keep it pushing. I don't have a choice because there's always place. I had a mental breakdown at soccer last week, and I'm thinking to myself, I need to suck it the up before Lincoln gets back in this car. Like, I gotta suck this up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so. Because in case the coach comes to talk to me or another parent stops over to my car, like, I'm gonna have to suck this the up. And then when I get home, I don't want the rest of the kids asking me why I was crying. So, like, I kind of just, like, don't have time. And it's like, I have to, like, let it out, because if I don't, something else Will. Will. It'll be. Get worse. But then if I do, I have to, like, give it a time and then keep it moving.

[A]

Well, crying, it's an emotional release. Right. I think for some people, somebody like me, I can just turn my emotions completely off, like a switch. Like, it's. But I think that's a trained brain to be able to do that. And it could be from raising. I'm not really sure what it is.

[B]

Actually.

[A]

It's something that I'm working through in therapy because I'm like, I do. I said to my therapist when I went. I said, I do not cry. What is wrong with me? Like, it will not come out.

[B]

Do you disassociate, you think?

[A]

I think so. I just sent somebody a text message before this recording, and I said, I'm traumatized. And with this mindset and me out of town, this is not good. Please do not contact me.

[B]

And you don't give a no. And you haven't said anything until right now where I would have been. Like, I just texted this person.

[A]

Yeah. No, it's like, I can just compart. Compartmentalize, almost. But isn't compartmentalizing more like a man?

[B]

Yeah, it's more like a male.

[A]

Yeah. What you hear, like, in the media or what you read about is, like, men are very much known for compartmentalizing, and women are known to be way more emotional, like, emotionally charged. I feel like, kill. If we're going off of stereotypes, fits more of, like, the woman. And I am much more like a guy in that way. I've actually been told dating in two different scenarios. You literally operate like a man. It's like, you can't hurt me.

[B]

Yeah, I'll. Yeah.

[A]

Don't text me.

[B]

Don't text me.

[A]

Don't call me. Don't see me me. Don't drive by my house.

[B]

That's what Rio says when he's mad. Don't see me.

[A]

Oh, bless him.

[B]

Don't see me.

[A]

That's so sad.

[B]

Don't see me. And it's like, you. You're right here done being perceived.

[A]

Okay, I need to ask this question now that it's at the tip of my tongue. If you're going through something relationally with somebody, can you just shut it off and be like, don't talk to me. I've got too much to do. Or are you like the hyper fixated? Like, I need to focus on this right now and I need to fix it.

[B]

I need to fix it right now.

[A]

See, I am not and do not

[B]

in your Whole life say, we need to, we need to talk when you get home. If you're not gonna tell me right the now, we can just talk when we get home. You don't need to announce it. I tell me now, I'm gonna throw it up. Tell me right now or I will throw up on this phone.

[A]

See, I am the exact opposite. It's like, if something has happened and there needs to be a conversation, I need about 24 hours to process that. I might possibly be a slow processor, but I need time to process that before I even get to the conversation. And by the time that I get to the conversation, you're probably not going to like what comes out of my mouth, but I'm still going to say it. Well, I. I run through every scenario in my mind in like 24 hours of, is this even worth addressing? And then if I deem that it's not worth addressing, I'm not having a conversation about it. Have a conversation with yourself. Why did we get to this point that you feel that we need to have the conversation and I don't feel that we need to have the conversation?

[B]

Yeah, just tell me right now. If you can't tell me right now, don't tell me we need to talk later.

[A]

You're like, actually, don't tell me at all.

[B]

Like, if we need to talk later, just talk to me later.

[A]

But it gives you bubble guts, right? Like, it gives you.

[B]

Yeah, why do you need to tell me that? So you know, I'm anxiety and it's like on, in therapy we learn, like, your perception is nobody's business or like your feelings are nobody else's business or like, that's a you problem because they told you you need to talk and how your emotions towards that only you can control it. Okay, well, my boundary, though, is do not because I can't function. That is something that I can't undo right now and I won't be able to undo in this for foreseeable future. So do not do that to me. And that's my boundary. Like, cool. You, I. You're not. You can't manage my emotions about it. But, like, you can control whether or not you send that text. And I'm asking you, do not send me a text like that.

[A]

I mean, I think that's fair. I'm not saying that it's not fair. I'm just saying you can handle it

[B]

better than I can.

[A]

Like, if you sent me a text message when I get home and you're like, hey, we really need to talk about Something I would be like, okay, let me know in the next couple of days when we can talk. And you're like, no, I need to call right now.

[B]

Or like, whenever I had to talk to Madison, I was like, hey, like, you're not in trouble at all. I just want to run through some things with you. But, like, you're not in trouble. I just need to go over X, Y, and Z. Yeah, that's fine. But, like, if someone comes to me and is like, hey, Kale, I don't. We don't need to talk right this second, but I wanted to talk to you about. Your refrigerator's not working. Working. Okay, cool. Thank you.

[A]

And see, but if you're like, hey,

[B]

we have a big problem. We need to talk, and it's literally my refrigerator. I'm my brains out in the Wawa bathroom off.

[A]

I mean, I get the perspective. Like, I get it. And I do feel like I used to be a little bit like that. But it is not uncommon for me in a relationship for some to happen. Argument, disagreement, whatever. And I am the person that's like, I am not talking about it right now. Now, I have this on my schedule today. You are not inconveniencing me. You have pissed me off. And there is going to be no conversation until I have time to process what I need to say.

[B]

Situational. If it's something I did wrong, I need to know right now. If it's something they did wrong. No hold bar. Anything goes at that point, because now you're going to wait till I'm ready. But if it's something that I did wrong or, I don't know, like a guilty conscience about something. No. Now we need to figure it out now.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Do you know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah, I can see that.

[B]

Like, if Ike, text me right now, hey, I need to talk to you when I get home. No, the. You don't.

[A]

You need to call me right?

[B]

You need to call me right now. I'm stopping the recording.

[A]

Oh, my God. And me, I'm over here sending a text.

[B]

Like, do not contact.

[A]

Do not contact me. Not the time or the place.

[B]

Do not contact me.

[A]

Okay, next one who is is more likely to cheat on a board game. Did you change your answer? That's cheating.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

She put luck. I put Kale.

[B]

I wouldn't cheat on a board game.

[A]

I feel like Kale would cheat on a board game if it's not.

[B]

Unless it's Becky. That's the only time that I would cheat on a board game is if it's Becky, because.

[A]

Because you just hate losing to her so bad.

[B]

Yes. And I don't know what it is. I think it's because I know that I'm gonna lose use.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because she's so competitive and she's so good at anything. Like, competitive.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I don't think, like, if it was with you, I wouldn't cheat with you. And if it was like, my kids or something, I'm not gonna cheat. Lux is the cheater in the family on board games.

[A]

Okay, so one time we were playing board game. Jackson's like, oh, yeah, we're gonna play Payday. Well, he was, like, hiding cards and money in his. In his, like, draws. Like, what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, of his stuff. And I kept seeing him walk away and going towards the refrigerator, act like he was getting water. And when I tell you, nothing pisses me off more than someone trying to cheat on something. Like, if I catch you trying to cheat or manipulate or you lie to me one single time, I don't care what it is. If I asked you, kale, did you touch my needo? And you said. Said, it's right here. But if I said, kill, did you touch my needle? And I watched you do it, and you say, no, I don't care if you didn't remember. You just lied to me. Like, literally, do not lie to me. I hate it. I told Jackson. I was like, you are now restricted from family game night. I cannot believe that you would do something like that. That is so horrible. What if someone hears this story way down the line? They're going to think that you. You cannot be fair with money. They think that you cannot play fair at life. Your boss, when you grow up, is going to find out about this, and they're not going to trust you and hire you to do the job. This is terrible. And you have. You have really disappointed your family members.

[B]

What did he say?

[A]

He said, it's not that serious. It's just a board game, and I wanted to win. And I said, said, what you wanted to do was cheat. And I don't have thieves in this house. Do you understand? I said, you get no snacks. You have to go and brush your teeth. You need to get in the bed. There is no tv. Do not play with any toys. Do not open your eyes

[B]

just because he cheated on a board game.

[A]

On a board game. I take that stuff so seriously. Because also, what if you were in sports and, like, you lied to a referee? Or, like, what if you were playing a game at school and I've allowed you to get by with that at home. And then you do that and embarrass yourself at school. No, I'm going to embarrass you at home so that you. That will live with you for forever. And then I would keep going by his room, and I was like, have you thought about what you did?

[B]

Have you thought about the depth. Depths of your. What was I gonna say? The. What is it? I mean, it's deception. The depths, truly.

[A]

Treachery.

[B]

No, it is.

[A]

And I told him. I went in there, sat down on his bed after I got cooled off, and I said, unfortunately, son, I think this is gonna have to be something that we call your dad about, because it's not something that I can keep in this house because, you know, you could lose a job over this one day.

[B]

And what did he say?

[A]

This would be horrible. He was like, please don't call my dad. I'm like, this is not funny.

[B]

But it. Jackson. I'm laughing, but also.

[A]

But it also is funny.

[B]

You see that United States map right there?

[A]

Yeah. I can't read it.

[B]

Becky and I did them here at the content house, like on a video. But we went home, and I made the kids do it. And Lincoln was using his Apple watch couch, and I caught him, but I didn't tell him I caught him. Like, he doesn't know that I know.

[A]

Oh, sometimes speaking of cheating and kids using, like, chat GPT and stuff, sometimes I will see Jackson doing something for school, and I see him taking a picture of his laptop screen, and I'm like, I know what you're doing. Do you remember the board game?

[B]

Do you remember the depths of your deception at family game night Night? Jackson, do you remember?

[A]

And then the next time that he wanted to play family game night, he was like, let me keep the score. I said, oh, do you remember that day that you cheated at payday?

[B]

First of all, what the is payday?

[A]

And I told him some. Some board game. And I told him next time it was like a snow day, and he wanted to play, like, this sticky tic tac toe game. And I said, you can get that game out. That's fine. But just know I'm watching.

[B]

I'm watching you go to the fridge to get your water.

[A]

Your water, water, my snack. Everyone's gonna find out.

[B]

And then I'm lying as a reference.

[A]

This behavior is going to ruin your entire career that you don't have. Your career that you don't have.

[B]

You won't be able to get into college.

[A]

Don't piss me off.

[B]

This is the scandal of Aunt Becky. The. What's the one from Full House where she gets a. Oh, yeah, that is

[A]

what College admission scandal.

[B]

That's going to be Jackson 1000%.

[A]

Wait, okay, so let me tell. Apparently, let me tell you another parenting thing that I did and I hope that I found out that he and will possibly listen to Coffee Combo's podcast. So if you guys are listening, shout out to y'.

[B]

All.

[A]

Hope you're having fun on your cruise. So I have been having a problem with finding like Sprite cans and Coke cans in Jackson's room. And it's like I know that I've put you to bed with water and the teeth were brushed. You know, like I'm not that much of a degenerate. Right, Right. You've been put to bed, the fans are on. Like the dehumidifier's on, the TV is on with the timer. Like everything is in place, including you. You. Why am I coming in there and I'm finding freeze dried skittles and crumbs all over the bed and soda cans

[B]

everywhere in the middle of the night?

[A]

Well, I will see in the morning when I go get him up.

[B]

No, but like that means that he's.

[A]

He was getting up the night roaming. Yeah. And so I looked at him starving during the day. No.

[B]

Like, are you starving him? No. Well, you told him he couldn't have

[A]

snacks for game night.

[B]

Yeah, but he might have been hungry.

[A]

That wasn't on game night. This has been a habitual offense. Okay? And we don't need soda at after 10 o' clock at night. I'm sorry, we just don't. And I also know that you have been fed three squares. You have had snacks. Squares. You have had snacks. And you are very well hydrated. So there is no reason for that in said bedroom.

[B]

Right.

[A]

So I walk in there one morning and I see all this laying around and I let. I let it happen a couple days and I never said anything, but I just let him see my eyes were like tracking towards that way. Like I see it, but like I'm not going to say anything. Well then on the third day that I went in there, I saw it and I said, where is this from? He said, what? I said, your drinks, your freeze dried Skittles. Where did that come from? Cuz the last time I saw it, it was in the pantry. Well, I just felt like I. I said, no, I didn't. You didn't feel like anything? What you were doing?

[B]

You didn't feel like anything.

[A]

You were roaming is what you were doing. You were roaming around this house. So I waited until the next week. He comes back home and he sees that the new alarm system's like, plugged up. I tell him that I have cameras everywhere in the house. I don't. I lied.

[B]

Don't let him hear this podcast.

[A]

I'm like, will, please shut it off at this point. I told him that I have an alarm system that detects motion for certain hours of the night.

[B]

And no, I'm gonna do the same thing when I get home.

[A]

And that when I press those buttons, that we have a certain amount of time that we have to get to our rooms and it will go off.

[B]

It's like those lasers where it's like you have to like, go over and under them. It's like that.

[A]

It'll go off at 7am so it will stop detecting motion at 7am him. But anytime before that, it's detecting motion. And he's like, why? Why would you do that? That's crazy. I said, oh, I know it's crazy. But what's Crazier is a 13 year old eating freeze dried Skittles and drinking two sodas in the middle of the night. So now I don't have to worry

[B]

about it to this point. Like, lying to our kids.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I told Creed, what's too far? No, nothing.

[A]

Me.

[B]

Nothing's too far. At this point, I told Creed, I said, you know, when you lie, unfortunately, worms come out your butt. I don't know why. It was the first thing I came up with. Why?

[A]

Why did you say that?

[B]

So he freaks out, right?

[A]

Just wait.

[B]

He looks at me in the shower and he says, how come when I've been lying to you, worms haven't been coming out my butt? And I'm like, creed, if you thought worms were gonna come out your butt, why are you lying to me? Yeah, and he's lying about dumb.

[A]

Like, what? Well, see, that's how you create like a pathological liar when they start lying about dumb, you know?

[B]

Well, it's the same song and dance. Are you wearing Lux's underwear? Are you wearing your own? You know? And so, like, I think that's probably like, the subconscious reason I said worms will come out your butt. Because, like, if you're wearing Lux's underwear, now you're gonna ruin his underwear because the worms are going to come out your butt, you know? But so now he knows, like, there's no, like, he's five and he barely believed my, like, reason for why he shouldn't lie. Well, that One was crazy.

[A]

Worms coming out of your butt is insane. I mean, at least think it through. Like, desperate is gonna happen, and if worms don't come out, you're done.

[B]

Yeah, worms didn't come.

[A]

Parenting is over for you.

[B]

But, like, I didn't. I didn't know he was lying to me either. So, like, that's a problem.

[A]

Oh, I know when everybody's lying to me before I ask, right? Like, if I ask a question and everybody in my life knows this, if I ask a question, it is because I already know the answer to it. Like, I am not wasting my time asking you something that I can find the answer on my own. You know, you are trapped, so you might as well go ahead and tell me.

[B]

Wait.

[A]

Kale should go and get, like, some worms. Worms from the gas station. You know, like, the crawlers. And put them in the toilet.

[B]

Toilet.

[A]

And be like. And be like, creed, you've been lying. Like, who pooped there?

[B]

No, I'm just gonna blame Creed right off rib because he's the one that said he's been lying. He admitted to lying.

[A]

He's like.

[B]

So I'm gonna be like, you went to your dad's, and all the worms came back.

[A]

Can you imagine? Can you video it?

[B]

No. I will literally do that.

[A]

I love this idea. Just go get you some crawlers, girl.

[B]

I'm just gonna. Hey, I. Can you bring some worms home?

[A]

Okay, on that note, we have foul play. Hi, kitties. I was on a second date with a guy who I really liked. On our first date, he was saying how much he loved a girl in a dress and how he loves women to cook for him. Okay, he's immediately off the date.

[B]

Yep. Immediately. I'm not interested.

[A]

I decided to invite him over to my house. I put on a fancy dress, curled my hair, pinned up the front with a couple of bobby pins, secured it with a lot of hairspray. When he arrived, I told him I was making homemade chicken Alfredo. To really impress him, I decided to show off my grilling skills and grill up the chicken breasts.

[B]

Good for you, girlfriend.

[A]

The amount of effort that's just been said in these three sentences is way more than I've ever done my entire life.

[B]

I'm not pinning my hair in place and standing barefoot in the kitchen to cook chicken Alfredo.

[A]

Chicken Alfredo. That's crazy. Like, and also to do chicken Alfredo on the grill.

[B]

Like, I don't have words for that.

[A]

She says, we went outside, and I went to light up the grill. I turn on the lp, turn down all four, burners and press the ignite button. Nothing happens. So I keep pressing the ignite button, but again, nothing happens. My date begins to say, I think we should shut it off. I stick my head into the grill.

[B]

Oh, why didn't he just help her turn it on? How about that?

[A]

I stick my head into the grill to get a closer look, push the ignite button, and boom, the grill, grill, grill blows up in my face. To my horror, I realized that my hair is on fire. Quickly began patting it out with my hands to put it out. I look at my date and say, how bad is it? His eyes say all that? His eyes said it all. He had a completely horrified look on his face. He just says, just go to the bathroom. I excuse myself to the bathroom, and to my horror, every single hair on my face was gone. No eyebrows, no eyelashes. And where every hair follicle was located was burned into a little black ball. I noticed my hairline was also singed. And when I put. When I pulled the bobby pins out of the entire section. Did you guys make this up?

[B]

No. I've never heard that. I feel so bad, and I feel horrible. Even worse that I'm laughing at her pain. Like, this is something that she probably struggled with for weeks. Weeks? What?

[A]

You said weeks. Her hairs were singed off. That's not growing back in weeks.

[B]

Like your eyebrows.

[A]

Your eyebrows would not grow back in weeks. My grandmother waxed my eyebrows in the 90s. And one still up.

[B]

I'm so pissed at that guy for not helping her. I think we should turn it off. You and light the grill off.

[A]

She says, when I pulled the bobby pins out, the entire section fell into this.

[B]

No.

[A]

I walked out of the bathroom and my date says, why don't you just take a shower? You smell like a burn body after showering. He was sweet and, oh, now he's sweet enough.

[B]

He belongs in hell.

[A]

He was sweet enough to have dinner with me, but after this day, I never saw him again. This bitch burned her whole fucking facial hairs off. No hair.

[B]

He had dinner with me, but I never saw him again.

[A]

She said, I have never been more mortified, but it gives me a good laugh to this day. I hope it gives you guys a good laugh as well. Love the podcast. You guys keep me occupied on long drives. Love, Emily.

[B]

I love Emily so much, and I'm so sorry that happened to you. We should have cut it off at the point that he tried to. Like, he should have said, hey, thank you so much for cooking. I'm gonna go turn the grill on for you. You. The fact that he watched her struggle and then said, I think we should turn it off.

[A]

It's giving like housewife.

[B]

It is. And it's giving like trad wife.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But also like the fact.

[A]

Which is fine.

[B]

I'm still stuck on the fact that he didn't help her with the grill. As manly as you are, you didn't have the common gentleman courtesy to help her turn on the.

[A]

Actually, what I've noticed. This might be a controversial take. Fake. But what I have noticed.

[B]

Men don't know how to do.

[A]

No. Men who want a woman like this, they don't know how to do that stuff. Men who do know how to do it don't really care to have to have a woman like this. Could you imagine if I went and stuck my head into a grill with a man standing there and that thing ignited all over my face? Brought my eyebrows and my eyelashes and my whole hair to the.

[B]

The.

[A]

My bobby pins, like, were singed. Could you imagine?

[B]

I think you can simply cook the grill the chicken for me.

[A]

So are we saying that that is a blue job?

[B]

I'm saying that him for emotional distress. She deserved better.

[A]

And on that note, we've got to go film Tick tocks to entertain you guys. Join us on the Fatherless Behavior tour this summer. Tickets@kale Lowry.com thank you for always supporting our show. Please subscribe and review on the Apple podcast and app, follow and rate on Spotify or listen wherever you get your pods. For our latest merch, visit coffeecombos podcast.com to shop. Full video episodes are available on Kale's [e-mail] Kale Lowry please don't. Please don't forget to follow us on Instagram and join our Facebook group to connect with us in our community. We hope you guys have a great week and we'll talk to you soon.

[B]

See ya. Okay, guys, we're back. You asked for it. And we're delivering. Killer is going on tour. We're super excited for the fatherless behavior tour. 23 cities, three countries, all in one summer. And you guys can check out tour dates and see if we're coming to a city near you on killlowry.com and if you want early access to information and announcements, head over to Path Patreon because you might get it before everyone else.

[A]

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Never. Hey, quick question. Why do you keep thinking you can change that man? I mean you are not his mother. Let someone else change that poopy diaper and focus on yourself. Hi everyone. I'm Violet Benson, your Russian Vic sister and an almost adulting vile event square. I give you that tough love, dating advice and reality checks that you didn't ask for but you absolutely need. We talk relationships, confidence, mental health, boundaries and how to finally stop settling for crumbs. You deserve better babe. And it starts with me. So new episodes every Thursday. Come hang out with me. Follow rate and review Almost Adulting wherever you get your podcasts.

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