I SURVIVED: Any Time You Believe A Man Is God You're Brainwashed

Summary

Cold Case Files: Episode Summary
Title: I SURVIVED: Any Time You Believe A Man Is God You're Brainwashed
Host: Paula Barros
Release Date: June 14, 2025

---

In this compelling episode of Cold Case Files, host Paula Barros delves into harrowing accounts of individuals who escaped the clutches of manipulative cults. Through the testimonies of Amber, Khalil, and Elijah, listeners gain an intimate glimpse into the psychological manipulation, abuse, and resilience required to break free from such oppressive environments. The episode underscores the vital lesson that placing absolute faith in a singular male figure—often presented as a deity—can lead to profound brainwashing and control.

---

Amber's Story: Surviving the Zionist Society

Background:
Amber's tumultuous journey began shortly after her adoption. Raised by parents who struggled financially and dabbled in various cults, Amber's early life was unstable. Her parents' quest for spiritual fulfillment led them to the Zionist Society, a fundamentalist group in Ogden, Utah, led by Arvin Shreve.

Life in the Cult:
At the age of 12, Amber was forcibly separated from her parents and placed under strict surveillance. The cult enforced rigid control over the lives of its members, particularly targeting the youth for indoctrination and abuse. Amber was indoctrinated into what the group termed the "sexual way of life," where she endured repeated sexual abuse under the guise of fulfilling a special mission.

Key Events:
Amber's awareness of the cult's atrocities peaked shortly before her 14th birthday when she was coerced into sexual servitude. Her attempts to escape led her to contact social services, but false hopes were dashed when rescue agents failed to respond promptly, deepening her despair. Ultimately, intervention by authorities led to her removal from the cult and the subsequent investigation that resulted in Arvin Shreve's conviction.

Aftermath:
Post-rescue, Amber faced numerous challenges, including placement in multiple foster homes and grappling with substance abuse. Despite these obstacles, she managed to rebuild her relationship with her adoptive parents, emphasizing forgiveness and the importance of trusting her instincts to survive.

Notable Quotes:

• "Anytime that you can believe that a man, a mere mortal, is God, you're brainwashed." [02:14]
• "I survived because I always held onto just a little bit of hope throughout all of the trauma." [14:31]

---

Khalil's Story: Escaping the Nation of Yahweh

Background:
Khalil, a 19-year-old college student from Liberty City, Florida, found himself ensnared by the Nation of Yahweh after being captivated by its narrative that redefined black identity and destiny. The group's charismatic leader, Yahweh Ben Yahweh, drew followers with promises of empowerment and a divine mission.

Life in the Cult:
Under Yahweh's authoritarian rule, Khalil was subjected to intense indoctrination, including long hours of labor and perpetual surveillance. The cult employed love bombing to foster deep psychological dependence, making it difficult for members to envision life outside the group. Khalil witnessed and was indirectly involved in violent acts orchestrated by Yahweh to maintain control and eliminate opposition.

Key Events:
Khalil's turning point came when he realized the extent of Yahweh's brutality, including ordered murders to suppress dissent. His growing discomfort culminated in a desperate attempt to escape, ultimately leading him to contact the FBI. This bold move precipitated Yahweh's arrest and the disintegration of the Nation of Yahweh.

Aftermath:
To ensure his safety, Khalil entered the FBI's witness protection program, relocating to another state and adopting a new identity. The psychological scars remained, as he struggled with nightmares and the loss of his family within the cult. Khalil's journey highlights the enduring impact of cult trauma and the challenges of reintegration into society.

Notable Quotes:

• "Anytime that you can believe that a man, a mere mortal, is God, you're brainwashed." [23:21]
• "I did get involved with the drugs and the drinking and the partying and just to try to hide from it." [14:14]

---

Elijah's Story: Breaking Free from the Tony and Susan Alamo Christian Foundation

Background:
Elijah was born into the Tony and Susan Alamo Christian Foundation in Fouke, Arkansas. The cult, led by the charismatic evangelists Tony and Susan Alamo, operated a compound where over a thousand members lived under strict religious directives. The community emphasized the imminent return of Jesus and maintained rigorous control over education and daily life.

Life in the Cult:
Elijah's upbringing was marred by severe indoctrination and physical abuse. The sudden death of his mother, Susan Alamo, and her subsequent failed resurrection attempt led to increased volatility and brutality within the group. Tony Alamo's desperation to witness a miracle transformed into ruthless violence against the children, fostering a pervasive environment of fear and obedience.

Key Events:
Determined to escape the relentless abuse, Elijah orchestrated a daring breakout with the help of a fellow member, Steven. Their escape was fraught with danger, as the cult maintained tight surveillance over its members. After reaching safety, Elijah severed ties with his family and the cult, seeking solace in a new life and ultimately witnessing Tony Alamo's conviction for heinous crimes.

Aftermath:
Elijah's escape did not free him from the psychological torment of his past. The trauma of the beatings and the loss of his familial bonds weighed heavily on him. Nonetheless, he emerged as an advocate, dedicating his life to helping others find their voices and avoid falling prey to similar cult dynamics.

Notable Quotes:

• "Anytime a man can make you forget about your family, the people that raised you, you're brainwashed." [23:52]
• "He's the devil. I think he's people's worst nightmares." [39:21]

---

Conclusion

This episode of Cold Case Files serves as a stark reminder of the insidious nature of cults and the profound impact they can have on individuals and families. Through Amber, Khalil, and Elijah's harrowing experiences, listeners are urged to remain vigilant against manipulative authorities and to trust their instincts when faced with coercive control. The survivors' resilience and courage highlight the importance of hope, self-belief, and the relentless pursuit of freedom in overcoming oppressive forces.

---

Notable Additional Quotes:

• Khalil on his loyalty and internal conflict: "We believed that heaven was on earth. We believed that we were going to live forever." [21:14]
• Elijah on the aftermath of escaping: "I didn't ever say anything. I thought that life is not worth living anymore." [36:55]

---

This detailed narrative not only illuminates the personal battles faced by cult survivors but also underscores the broader societal implications of such groups. Cold Case Files successfully weaves together these stories to provide a comprehensive understanding of the mechanisms of control and the indomitable spirit required to reclaim one's life from such environments.

Transcript

[Amber]

McCrispy strips are now at McDonald's.

[Narrator]

Tender, juicy and its own sauce.

[Amber]

Would you look at that.

[Narrator]

Well, you can't see it, but trust.

[Khalil]

Me, it looks delicious.

[Narrator]

New McCrispy strips now at McDonald's. Craving your next action packed adventure? Audible delivers thrills of every kind on your command, like Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir where a lone astronaut must save humanity from extinction. Now narrated with stunning intensity by Ray Porter. From electrifying suspense and daring quests to spine tingling horror and romance in far off realms, unleash your adventure aside with gripping titles that'll keep you guessing. Discover exclusive Audible originals, hotly anticipated new releases and must Listen bestsellers that hook you from the first minute. Because Audible knows there's no greater thrill than the one that speaks to to you. Discover what lies beyond the edge of your seat. Start your free 30 day trial at audible.com wonderyus that's audible.com wonderyus did you know that parents rank financial literacy as the number one most difficult life skill to teach? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money app for families. With Greenlight, you can send money to kids quickly, set up chores automate allowance and keep an eye on your kids spending with real time notifications. Kids learn to earn, save and spend wisely and parents can rest easy knowing their kids are learning about money with guardrails in place. Try Greenlight Risk free [e-mail] Wondery hi I survived listeners. I'm Marissa Pinson, and if you're enjoying this show, I just want to remind you that episodes of I Survived as well as the A and E classic podcast, Cold Case Files, City Confidential and American justice are all available ad free on the new A and E Crime and Investigation channel on Apple Podcasts and Apple plus for just $4.99 a month or $39.99 a year. And now onto the show. This episode contains stories involving violence against children. Listener discretion is advised.

[Amber]

I thought that we were the chosen people. I thought that the end of the world was going to come, and I thought it was going to come soon.

[Khalil]

Real people, Anytime that you can believe that a man, a mere mortal, is God, you're brainwashed who escaped a cult.

[Elijah]

I knew without a doubt that this was probably going to be the worst beating I ever got.

[Narrator]

This is I survived cults. It's 1991 in Ogden, Utah. Amber was given up for adoption a few weeks after she was born. Her adopted parents ran a shop selling drug paraphernalia.

[Amber]

They were from the hippie generation, so they were really, you know, wild and into psychedelics and into smoking and drinking. And then they found God. One day when the missionaries from the LDS Church showed up and they felt like they had found God just with the Mainstream Mormon Church.

[Narrator]

9 year old Amber's parents sold their shop and moved to Utah.

[Amber]

Economically, they were broke. They had lost their jobs. We lost our home and we were homeless for a little while. We lived in a storage unit in a tent.

[Narrator]

Destitute, Amber's parents began experimenting with several fundamentalist cults.

[Amber]

My parents joined a couple of other little cults prior to joining the Arvin Shreve group. But, but when they met the Arvind Shreve group and they called themselves the Zionist Society, they felt that they had found the real truth leader.

[Narrator]

Arvind Shreve was an excommunicated Mormon who called himself a prophet. He claimed that God talked directly to him.

[Amber]

Arvind Shreve was not your typical man that you would think of as like a leader. He was short and bald and stocky, you know, overweight. All I remember thinking is that I hope that he likes me.

[Narrator]

The Zionist Society owned all the houses in a cul de sac in the small town of Ogden.

[Amber]

It was very beautiful and bright and sunshiny. On the outside it looked like a Stepford neighborhood. The lawns were manicured. Everything was exactly perfect. The women, the children, hair curled, nothing out of place. It was what they felt like was heaven on earth.

[Narrator]

Arvind Shreve preached to his 70 followers that they would be the only survivors of the impending apocalypse.

[Amber]

There were secret rooms built within each of the homes. There's a certain button that you push on the shoe rack and then it lifts up and all of a sudden there's these stairs that go down. They were built so that when the end of the world came, we would have a soundproof room where with gun supply and first aid and food, nobody would know that they were even there.

[Narrator]

The Zionist Society also endorsed polygamy where the men could have multiple wives. 12 year old Amber was separated from her parents soon after her family joined the group.

[Amber]

My parents lived in a different house down the street. And if I were to want to talk or speak to my parents, I would have to set up an appointment with them. And everything that we did had to be done in threes. Three women had to go. I was put in the home that was right directly across the street from Arvin Shreve's home. And I was chosen to be in their sister council, meaning I was a wife or a Wife to be of Arvin Shreve. Everybody in the group knew where you were at all times, watching to make sure that you were doing what you were supposed to be doing, wearing what you're supposed to be wearing and thinking what they want you to be thinking. None of the women or children were allowed to go to public school. And you would think that we would be taught math and science and, you know, everything there at home, but we weren't. What we were taught is how to sew, how to read scriptures and how to sexually satisfy the self proclaimed prophet. There was a woman that was in charge of what they called the sexual way of life and they called it the swol. And so her mission was to teach sexuality. She would play games with young women called Rape in the Dark with dildos and toys and just very horrible things. Teaching children and young women things that they shouldn't even know or think about at that age. They would do these games with such laughter and they tried to add what they called a playfulness to it. And they knew I was afraid of it. And so they would come to me and tell me that, oh, you have a special mission in life through your sexuality and it's your job to even teach the other children what to do sexually. My father had heard about the sexuality things going on and he confronted Arvin and said, this, this is not the way of God. And they kicked my parents out of the group. But then they also said, but God did say that Amber's supposed to stay. I remember my dad standing by the car saying, we're leaving, get in the car. All of the men and all of everyone from the group was there surrounded around the car, like to protect me from getting in the car with my parents. The truth is, all I really wanted was a home. I felt like a little security in the group that I didn't have prior with, you know, the being poor with my parents. So the little rebellion in me was like, I'm staying. I remember watching them drive off and thinking, when am I going to see them again? I had no idea what was going to happen by me staying. I realized, like, I want my parents. And they were gone. I had no idea how to contact them at all. I really had no one to talk to.

[Narrator]

Shortly before Amber's 14th birthday, she was summoned to Arvin's house.

[Amber]

I had been groomed by the women in the group of what to do on how to satisfy Arvin. And when the day came that it was my turn, I didn't want to go. And they would all Assure me, no, it is. It's your time. And this is my really a special time. They dressed me up, and they put a little coat over me with lingerie underneath. And then they kind of just like, you know, shooed me out the door. That walk across the street was the longest walk of my life. And once I got to the other side of the street, you know, my childhood was over. He said something to the effect of like, do you love God or do you love the devil? And basically that question was, do I love him or am I going to walk away? Because if I walk away, then I'm going to be damned to hell's damnation. The fiery pit. I went into the room, and it wasn't a seduction of kissing. And all of the stuff that the women had taught me was very soft and, you know, in a different way. It was a very violent, horrible rape. He rolled over and he fell asleep. And all I remember is just staring and looking up and seeing lace curtains. I laid there solid frozen for the rest of the night because I did not want it to happen again. But it did happen again, and it happened again and again and again. And his rapes became a way of life. I was told that I had a special mission in the sexual way of life. Looking back on it, basically what that meant is Arvin liked raping me. I had so many mixed feelings about it. Once, when I was not in the room with Arvin and when I was just around all of the women, it was a great privilege and an honor. I was almost like I was part of a harem. We would make hot salsa and talk about how wonderful Arvin is. And the things that were the most violent to me were talked about in ways of how good they were, that they were all supposed to feel good. So I started to feel like I was wrong and they were right, because all of my feelings were contrary to what I was supposed to be feeling.

[Narrator]

The Zionist society had a business selling erotic lingerie. The children, as well as young women in the cult sewed and then modeled the lingerie. People from outside the cult were sometimes invited to these shows.

[Amber]

Often they would sell clothing to strippers and local women or housewives. And they would say, you know, like, we're not allowed to speak to them. I started wondering, what would it be like to leave with them. I wonder what their lives are like.

[Narrator]

The cult leaders became concerned at Amber's curiosity.

[Amber]

Curiosity and questions is not part of having God's spirit with you. God doesn't want you to ask questions, and that's what we were taught. And that's when they started pulling me back where I was not able to participate in the lingerie shows anymore. I had to stay behind the scenes.

[Narrator]

Amber's isolation was made worse by radio and TV being forbidden in the cult.

[Amber]

There was an afternoon when I went with a couple of the other women in the car to go to the fabric store. And I turned the radio on in the car and there was a song playing, and I was like, I. All of a sudden, I felt good. I was like, I like this. This is music. This is rock and roll, and I'm a teenager. This feels good. And instantly, another woman turned it off and said, that's devil music. I'm like, no, I don't think so. I think that God wants me to listen to this. They kept it off, and I just started crying at that point. And I think that all of the tears and all of the things that I'd been holding in for so many years were just came out all at that time because I wasn't allowed to listen to that one song. And that was the day that I completely just broke down and fell apart. And I didn't care at that time whether I lived or died. My family, prior to joining these groups had social services called on them several times. So I knew about social services, and I knew that they could come in and they could take me out of the house.

[Narrator]

Amber decided to try and get to a phone in a house across the street. The children were watched at all times and made to work constantly.

[Amber]

Actually, the first few days after thinking the plan, my schedule became so tight that I was also wondering, like, can they read my thoughts now? Did they know that I was going to do this?

[Narrator]

Two more weeks went by before Amber saw an opportunity.

[Amber]

I just ran across the street to where the house was with the telephone. I ran inside. It felt like time was so slow motion, like I could not call fast enough.

[Narrator]

Amber pleaded with social services to rescue her, then sneaked back to her work.

[Amber]

I waited for social services. I thought, they're going to come and get me now. And I waited and I waited, and they didn't come. And I waited and I waited, and they didn't come. And the next day came, and they still didn't come. And then days started going by, and they still didn't come. And I just became just like, you know, I guess God didn't want me to leave, and he's probably protecting me. And I just became subservient. Okay, this is where I have to stay. This is What I have to do. This is survival. Finally, finally, just when I'd given up, you know, there was a doorbell range and all of the men from all of the homes came running out, you know, as they did when my father wanted to take me away and they said, you know, social services were here to pick up Amber.

[Narrator]

Amber was taken in as a ward of the state. The FBI launched an investigation into the Zionist society and the cult began to disintegrate after the group.

[Amber]

I did get involved with the drugs and the drinking and the partying and just to try to hide from it, I was put in 10 to 12 foster homes within a three month period because I would get kicked out of each foster home because I just was so out of control at that point.

[Narrator]

Arvin Shreve was convicted of sexually abusing children and sentenced to 20 years in prison. He died in 2009 at the age of 79.

[Amber]

I did see my parents again later on and I rebuilt my relationship with them, which was really difficult because I had to do a lot of forgiving. They still just are just a little bit lost from the hippie generation and they just want to be a part of something that's bigger than themselves. And, you know, they were manipulated just like everyone else. I survived because I always held onto just a little bit of hope throughout all of the trauma. And I always trusted and believed in my own instincts. Everyone around me told me something was wrong and I knew that something was right or someone, they would say, everything is right. And I knew it was wrong. That's why I survived. And that I still have my sanity.

[Narrator]

There's a predator hunting you. Silent patient. It doesn't need a weapon. It uses interest rates, late fees and collection calls. At first, you barely notice, until it tightens its grip. One day, your paycheck vanishes. Your bank account frozen. The life you built, gone. And the worst part, you never saw it coming. I know what that feels like. I've seen it myself. Friends overwhelmed by debt, feeling like they were drowning with no way out. It's awful. You feel powerless, stressed and alone. I wish I'd known about PDS debt back then. Because they're different. PDS debt goes beyond the numbers. They take the time to understand your unique situation and craft a personalized plan just for you. There's no minimum credit score required and their goal is simple. Help you save more, pay off your debt faster, and put money back where it belongs in your pocket. PDS debt is a rated by the Better Business Bureau with thousands of five star reviews on Google and trustpilot. They've helped hundreds of thousands of people get out of debt. And they can help you too. Don't wait until it's too late. Escape the trap. You're just 30 seconds away from being debt free. Get your free assessment and find the best option for you right [e-mail] survived. That's pdsdebt.com survived. Pdsdebt.com survived. You know how we all have that one friend who's always investigating better ways to help you manage your finances? Well, meet Experian, your trusty bff. And by that I mean big financial friend. The Experian app is like having a BFF who's an expert financial profile ready to crack the case on your finances and help you take control like a pro. Count on Experian to help prevent your finances from reaching a gruesome outcome. This big financial friend can help you find ways to save, check your FICO score, match you with credit cards, and discover other brilliant solutions to sort out your financial mysteries. Bet your other BFFs can't do all that. Hmm. And since this big financial friend is right on your phone, it's closer than any accomplice you'll ever have. Just download the Experian app and get started for free. Because honestly, the the only mystery you should be solving is knowing where your finances are headed. Results will vary. Credit offers, approvals and reward Programs based on FICO score 8 model and subject to lender terms. Offers not available in all states. See experian.com for details. Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile.

[Amber]

With the price of just about everything going up, we thought we'd bring our prices down.

[Narrator]

So to help us we brought in a reverse auctioneer which is apparently a.

[Khalil]

Thing Mint Mobile Unlimited Premium wireless everybody get 30, 30 better get 30, better.

[Amber]

To get 20, 2020 everybody get 20.

[Khalil]

20 everybody get 15, 15, 1515 just.

[Narrator]

15 bucks month so give it a.

[Amber]

[e-mail] Switch upfront payment of $45 for.

[Narrator]

Three month plan equivalent to $15 per month required new customer offer for first three months only. Speed slow after 35 gigabytes of network spizzy taxes and fees extra. See mintmobile.com It's 1980 in Liberty City, Florida. Khalil is a 19 year old college student. One of his friends has joined a religious group called the Nation of Yahweh.

[Khalil]

I just happened to be at his house one day and there was some literature about the this group on the table. So I picked it up and began to read it. And it just struck a chord with me. It was talking about black history, that black people, we were not actually Africans, that we were actually the lost descendants of Israel. And I've always been fascinated with wanting to know who I am as a black man growing up in America. As far as being a black person, we're like cut off from our history and our culture. And so it was saying what I wanted to hear. I jumped right in with both feet and I went the next Wednesday and I ran home, told my girlfriend about it. I said, you gotta come meet this man. He's this dynamic speaker. He's like, he's like Malcolm X.

[Narrator]

The group was led by a man who called himself Yahweh Ben Yahweh. The name was Hebrew for God, son of God. Khalil and his fiance both joined the nation of Yahweh.

[Khalil]

A lot of the teachings were about what you have been taught is a lie. You know, it's white education. The white devil is teaching you to continue to be a mental slave. I just dropped out of college and just started following this man full time. He would come to my room, my office, and just sit down on the floor and talk to me and my wife just for hours. Although I had a father in my life growing up, my father never like gave me that one on one attention. He said, I love you, now you're my son. You don't need the world or, you know, the people that raised you. I'm your father now.

[Narrator]

Yahweh was using a technique cult experts call love bombing.

[Khalil]

The people there, you know, they were from all walks of like the black community. There were some firemen, there were policemen, they were just all walks of society were in there every week. The crowd grew every week.

[Narrator]

Yahweh Ben Yahweh soon became a powerful force in the poor Miami neighborhood. The Yahweh cult owned hotels, supermarkets and other businesses.

[Khalil]

You had people that were joining the religion, joining the cult, that were giving their all cars, bank accounts. We even had drug dealers that were given large amounts of money. They weren't per se members, but they were sympathizers of the movement.

[Narrator]

Kahlil was made to work in the nation of Yahweh's print shop.

[Khalil]

He kept you working 14, 16 hours a day. And then so that when it was time to lay down, you were going to go straight to sleep because you were so tired. When you weren't sleeping, you were either working or you either were listening to lectures of his classes.

[Narrator]

The harsh work regime was A deliberate cult technique to break down individual will.

[Khalil]

There was no time for individuality or freedom of thought or nothing like that. We believed that heaven was on earth. We believed that we were going to live forever. We believed in the War of Armageddon. We were taught that one day that 144,000 men were going to, as he said, square the planet. Which means go throughout the earth and kill everybody that wasn't one of us. That is white people. There was probably about 15 people that were members of the group that left. And once they left, they began, we were told, to start their own group. And this made Yahweh Ben Yahweh kind of irate that there were some other people taking his lessons, taking his teachings and trying to form another group. So he began teaching lots of classes every Saturday, every Wednesday. The hypocrite must. There was a day where one of them actually came to the temple. We called him Elijah. And they kind of grabbed him. Probably about 10 guys, they grabbed him and they took him in the back. The next thing you know, I can hear, like, thuds, like I hear something going on. So, of course, curiosity got the best of me. So I decided to go back and just peep and see what was going on. So when I went back there, that's when I saw they were beating him. They opened the door. They drive a few cars up to the back door. They back them up, and they put him inside the trunk. And they got a machete that was in the back and threw it in the backseat of the car, and they left. So the next day, I read the. There was a local paper called the Miami Times. They had written about a jogger finding a body that was decapitated. One of the things that Yahweh, Ben Yahweh did, that he kept us in the Old Testament. Old Testament is full of murder. It's full of killings. It's full of people being beheaded. As far as I was concerned, he wasn't going against scripture. He was actually going with the scripture. Had I been asked to kill somebody, I would have done it without hesitation. I was brainwashed, absolutely.

[Narrator]

Yahweh Ben Yahweh was questioned by the police in relation to the murder.

[Khalil]

The detectives, the police department came to the temple to want to speak to Yahweh Ben Yahweh. He told them whatever he needed to tell them to get out of it. He said so many people join our religion every day that he couldn't keep count of count of that. But indeed, he did know Elijah over.

[Narrator]

The next four years, cult members were implicated in the murders of over a dozen people who opposed them.

[Khalil]

He's having a lot of people killed. Black, white, Cuban, a lot of folks coming up missing. He wanted Miami to know that, yes, in fact, we did do it. You better fear us. And people did fear us. I was absolutely brainwashed. Anytime that you can believe that a man, a mere mortal, is God, you're brainwashed. Anytime a man can make you forget about your family, the people that raised you, you're brainwashed. I had two children born in Yahweh. My oldest daughter, she was the first child born into the Yahweh cult. Yahweh Ben Yahweh delivered her.

[Narrator]

Yahweh Ben Yahweh took Khalil and his wife on a preaching tour around the country. They were made to leave their children in the care of the church.

[Khalil]

When I came back and I saw my children, their stomachs were bloated, clearly a sign of malnutrition. And I looked at my wife and I said, we gotta get out of here. But she wasn't having it.

[Narrator]

Unknown to Kahlil, his wife was sleeping with Yahweh Ben Yahweh.

[Khalil]

I knew if I left, I wouldn't be able to take the children. I'd have to leave by myself. But at that time, I wasn't. Mentally, I was ready to go, but physically I couldn't because I didn't want to break up my family.

[Narrator]

Kahlil stayed another year in the cult.

[Khalil]

We used to go out and collect donations. This day, I couldn't make a $10 quota. They made you get on your knees and. Just get on your knees and stay there for extended periods of time until your knees couldn't take it no more. I got in that room and got on my knees within five minutes, you know, my knees were on fire. Like I could not stand the pain. It was unbearable to me. It was. It was wrong. It was an injustice. I got up. I told my wife, I'm out of here. I can't do it no more. I love you. I know you're not ready to come, but I have to go. And I left. I walked down the street, very fearful, knowing full well that by the time the sun come up, I. I'm going to be dead. Because God Yahweh is going to strike me dead. But I'm ready for my fate. Because life is not worth living anymore.

[Narrator]

Lost and alone, he goes to his father's house.

[Khalil]

The last time me and my dad had talked, it was an argument, slash, almost fight, because I had told him three or four years before that he wasn't my father, that my real father is Yahweh Ben Yahweh. Here I am, extremely asking, can I come and stay with you? Because I don't have nowhere to go. And I guess time had kind of healed the wound. And he said, sure, you're my son. And so I was staying with him and just trying to figure out my life, you know? And I still had temple connections. I still had people that were still friends with me that would let me know what they were saying about me. So as time went on, it got back to me that basically they'd kill me if they caught me in the right place.

[Narrator]

Khalil's wife and children were still in the cult.

[Khalil]

I understood that in time, when my daughter grew up, she would be one of his wives. She would be someone that he could potentially get, you know, get at. I understood these things. So I was trying my desperate, desperately to get these kids away from this situation.

[Narrator]

Khalil managed to convince his wife to release the children into the care of their grandmother.

[Khalil]

I'd watch tv, and I would see things that were happening with the Yahwehs. And because I was an insider when these things happened, I knew in here that they had done it. One incident was them bombing this neighborhood up in Delray Beach. And I understood a little baby was burned. And to me, that was the last straw. I was like, somebody has got to put a stop to this madness. And evidently, no one's going to do it. I'll do it. I went downtown to the FBI office, walked in and told him, I need to talk to somebody. I started giving names, dates, times, places. I just spilled my guts to the FBI.

[Narrator]

For his own safety, the FBI placed Kahlil in their witness protection program for two years. He was moved to another state under a new name. Yahweh Ben Yahweh was convicted on racketeering and conspiracy charges and sentenced to 18 years in jail. He died of cancer in 2006.

[Khalil]

I didn't feel like I was behind. Like the cult was behind me until probably at least four years after I got out. People that I know that are still. That are out with me, that are my age, they still have nightmares. We all do. It's just something that's a part of the cult experience. I don't think you. You ever get over it.

[Narrator]

Khalil divorced his wife and became a writer.

[Khalil]

I survived the cult because I'm a born fighter. That's you know I'm a fighter.

[Narrator]

I survived is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy. Just drop in some details about yourself and see if you're eligible to save money when you bundle your home in auto policies. The process only takes minutes and it could mean hundreds more in your pocket. Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you could save Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. Mochi Health is here to help you start your weight loss journey with caring, personalized support. Meet one on one with board certified obesity doctors and registered dietitians who truly listen and understand your unique needs. Eligible patients can access affordable GLP1 medications delivered right to their door each month. No insurance, no problem. Mochi Health accepts FSA and HSA, making care accessible and affordable. And with 24. 7 customer service, you'll never feel alone on your path to better health. Get started with Mochi Health today. Take the free [e-mail] and use code AUDIO40 at checkout for $40 off your first month of membership. That's join mochi.com with promo code AUDIO40.

[Khalil]

Rakuten is the smartest way to save.

[Narrator]

Money when you shop because you earn.

[Khalil]

Cash back at over 3,500 stores.

[Narrator]

Fashion, beauty, electronics, home essentials, travel, dining.

[Khalil]

Concert tickets and more. Your favorite stores like Lowe's, Levi's and Nike. Pay Rakuten to send them shoppers and Rakuten then passes on a part of.

[Narrator]

That payment to its members as cash back.

[Khalil]

You're already shopping at your favorite stores. Why not save while you're doing it? It's a no brainer. Membership is free and easy to sign up.

[Narrator]

Get the Rakuten app now and join the 17 million members who are already saving. Cashback rates change daily. See rakuten.com for details. That's R a K u T E n Your cash back really adds up. It's 1973 in Fouke, Arkansas. Elisha was born into the Tony and Susan Alamo Christian Foundation. Elisha's parents were founding members of the church.

[Elijah]

My father had served two tours in Vietnam. He was a very troubled youth. He was really desperate to find something to find some belonging. And the Tony and Susan Alamo Christian foundation was perfect for him.

[Narrator]

Husband and wife evangelists Tony and Susan Alamo had a lucrative clothing empire and their own TV show. Their church had over 1,000 members. The members of the church all lived in a compound in rural Arkansas.

[Elijah]

We called them Papatoni and Grandma Susie. Papa Tony was like a big teddy bear. He had this formidable presence that was sometimes scary, but also at the same time, comforting, because we thought he would never let anything bad happen to us. Tony and Susan believed that every word of the King James version of the Bible was true, that Jesus was coming back to earth, that it could be at any moment. Our entire waking lives were really spent on this compound with a group of people. And we went to a school that they had created. The books that they used were religious textbooks. Every single thing in these textbooks were related to God in some way.

[Narrator]

When Elisha was 11, Susan Alamo became ill with cancer and died.

[Elijah]

My mom told me that she had died, but that she was raising from the dead.

[Narrator]

Susan's body was put in a coffin in Tony's living room. Tony ordered the group to pray for Susan's resurrection.

[Elijah]

Nobody's sleeping. Everybody's praying for her. And it was a sense of urgency that I really never experienced.

[Narrator]

After a week, Susan still hadn't risen from the dead, and Tony became furious.

[Elijah]

Tony really became an animal. There had to be a reason for her not to raise, because he believed that she would. And so he took it out on the children. Kids started being called into Tony's house, where beatings began in earnest. He was desperate for Susie to raise from the dead, and he believed that the children were one of the reasons why she wasn't. The devil was in the camp. We had to purge.

[Narrator]

Tony began beating the children with boards.

[Elijah]

He was rabid when it came to punishing children. There were people who were obviously bleeding. There were people who were screaming. There were kids who were passing out. It was a weekly event. The that I either was part of a beating or I was a witness to a beating. A lot of times he had kids come in and just watch. We really lived in a constant state of fear.

[Narrator]

Elijah decides that if she's to survive, she has to run away.

[Elijah]

I knew that running away meant that I was going to burn in hell, and I was prepared for that. I think at that time, I couldn't imagine any more beatings. I decided that I was gonna go to the grocery store that the cult owned, and down. Down a little ravine from the grocery store, there was a motel. And I ran down to the motel and I called the police, and I told them that I was a runaway and to please come get me.

[Narrator]

The police picked up Elijah from the motel and handed her to social services. She later appeared in court for a custody hearing.

[Elijah]

When I went to court. My parents were there. I was a firstborn child, and I was also child of the founding members of this place. And they were not going to let me go easily.

[Narrator]

The court made an order to return Elijah to the cult's compound.

[Elijah]

In the middle of the night, my parents yanked me out of bed and said it was time to go and talk to Tony. And so we drove up there. That's where Tony challenged my dad to beat me and that he wasn't a godly man if he didn't do it right. I knew without a doubt that this was probably going to be the worst beating I ever got. My dad came into and he was really excited. He was almost kind of bouncing up and down like a boxer right before they start the fight. He's just kind of ready to go. I followed him into a back room of the house, and he had the board there. It was a two by four, maybe three and a half feet long. He had whittled a handle down in front of all of us over a period of days. I could actually hear the wind as the paddle went through the air. And I was hit hard enough that I collapsed into the couch. It hit me again, and I fell into the couch again. And then he just started swinging. And my mom was standing in the doorway and she started saying, don't hit her arms. Don't hit her arms, because those leave visible marks. My mom didn't want anybody to know that her kids had been bad enough to be beaten.

[Narrator]

Elijah's father struck her dozens of times all over her body.

[Elijah]

I could feel warm blood. And I passed out. I woke up and then suddenly my mom appeared in the doorway and said, okay, I'll read Bible with you now. I think at that point I really shut down. I was afraid to look up. I was afraid to draw attention to myself. I didn't want anybody to look at me. I didn't ever say anything.

[Narrator]

Elijah was put back to work in the compound.

[Elijah]

One day there was a baptism at the church, and I noticed somebody that I hadn't seen before. He was in line to get baptized. There was something about him that I really never felt about anybody else, ever.

[Narrator]

The man's name was Steven, and he and Elijah became friends.

[Elijah]

He said that I was the saddest person that he'd ever seen in his life, and he wanted to do something to help me.

[Narrator]

Elijah and Steven made a plan to break her out of the culture.

[Elijah]

My grandparents happened to be visiting, and I told him on the phone what kind of car they had rented. So he flew in and rented the same kind of car.

[Narrator]

Steven drove onto the compound in broad daylight and picked Elijah up.

[Elijah]

I was terrified. That road was traveled by cult people every day, all day long. I was looking straight ahead and almost willing us every inch of the way to get further and further away from this compound. I held onto his hand tight and we just looked forward and tried to drive as inconspicuously as possible until we got to the state line.

[Narrator]

Elijah started a new life in another state.

[Elijah]

On Mother's Day that year, I called my mom. I didn't want to tell her where I was. I wanted to tell her I was okay. She told me I shouldn't be calling her, that I'm not her daughter. And that actually made me feel really free. That was my final tie. And that was severed.

[Narrator]

Elijah and Stephen have since married each other. In 2008, Tony Alamo was convicted on 10 counts of sexual conduct with girls as young as nine.

[Khalil]

God inseminated Mary at the age of around 10 to 12. Should we get him for having sex?

[Narrator]

I have a right to preach the gospel, don't I? Tony Alamo was sentenced to 175 years in prison.

[Elijah]

He's the devil. I think he's people's worst nightmares. I don't think that people realize that human beings like that can exist in the world. And they do, and he's one of them. I became a teacher to help people find their voices and to get them to think. I think I survive because in some ways, I can make a difference in the world to other people.

[Khalil]

This summer, Pluto TV is exploding with thousands of free movies. Summer of cinema is here. Feel the explosive action all summer long with movies like Gladiator, Mission Impossible, Beverly Hills Cop, Good Burger and Transformers. Dark of the Moon. Bring the action with you and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto tv Stream now. Pay never.

[Narrator]

Hey, this is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. Summer is here and Podcast one has a brand new sports podcast. It's the all new Pac Man Jones show called Politely Raw. Now on Podcast one, join former NFL star and pro bowl cornerback Pac Man.

[Khalil]

Jones as he brings you his unfiltered.

[Narrator]

Takes, raw interviews and stories as only.

[Khalil]

He can tell them.

[Narrator]

If you love sports, culture and controversy.

[Khalil]

You'Re going to love Politely Raw as.

[Narrator]

Nothing is off limits. This makes for an entertaining and compelling listen each and every time. The new Pac Man Jones show Politely Raw episodes drop weekly and are available wherever you find podcasts.