Bridget (2:20)
Apartment, just like I'd done many hundreds of times before that. I parked in my spot and went straight to my apartment, went inside, locked, two deadbolts and the chain. And that means you're safe inside. That means you're safe at home. It was a gated complex. It was in kind of an older part of town. It was like an okay neighborhood and. But the gate actually was stuck in the open position. I was kind of taking my time getting ready for bed, brushing my teeth and taking out my contacts and putting on sweatpants and stuff like you do. I was just walking in like a short a Short hallway in my apartment. And then I heard this loud boom on the front wall of my apartment. And it just. I just, like, froze because I knew then something was very, very wrong. And then I hurried to the door and looked out the peephole and then watched as this man was running straight at my door. And I almost remember it, like, it was slow motion because I didn't even have time to step back. He kicked the door, and it flew in. It hit me in the face, knocked me backward, and I fell to the ground. And then this man was in my apartment. He pointed a gun at me, and he told me that he wanted money. At this stage, it was like I entered another world. It was like, this is not my reality. I felt like I had taken in this. Like you do when you think something horrible is about to happen, and you're like. And you go to this other place for just a few seconds, and then you come down. Except I didn't ever come down. I was just like. He was, like a tall, skinny, young guy, but the only thing I was paying attention to was the gun. So I got my purse. I had $40 cash. I gave it to him, and he said, well, he said, let's go get your keys. We're going to get more money. He took my keys then and walked ahead of me to my car. So I knew then that he'd seen me park and go in alone, and that he'd been kind of waiting for his opportunity. And again, I'm, like, looking all around, like, totally, like, looking for anybody to go to for help, but there was no one, and he had a gun. And I just had a feeling, even then that he wasn't bluffing, that he would shoot me. And I was like, oh, my gosh, what am I going to do? I need time. Like, I'm going to this dangerous place, and I need to figure something out. He drove out of the complex, and that is when I started to, like, pray out loud. Kind of like, I didn't know what else to do. And I knew that I needed help. So I was praying, Hail Mary, full of grace. And also, I think I was at that point, already beginning to try to get him to see me as a human being. I said, I'm a teacher. I teach first grade at Fort Hood, which is right nearby, and I love teaching children to read. And I said, do you remember any teachers that were special to you as a child? And he's just ignoring me. And then I said. I said. I said, well, I always liked Peter Rabbit. Do you Remember that story? And even in my head, I was like, what am I? I felt like I sounded very desperate. He was not affected by that. He didn't act like he was affected by that. So then he drove across the street, and there was. It was like a big, empty parking lot, dark, and there was like a free, freestanding ATM in the middle. So I went up to the machine and I took out $200. He had told me to take out as much as you can, and that was the maximum. So I took out $200. And this was kind of a strange moment because I was physically separated from him. He stayed in the car, but there was no one around. So I still felt totally under his control. Drove out of the parking lot then and drove in a direction away from my apartment. So I was becoming, like, more and more terrified inside. I was really scared. I was thinking that maybe he was going to take me back to where there was, like, a gang, and I would be raped and tortured by lots of people I didn't know. I had all of these things going through my head. He kept driving, and finally he did find what he was looking for. And it was this, like, kind of like empty, undeveloped field, a very large field. He just, like, drove into this darkness. And I felt like. I felt like he drove a very long time. But it must have just been a minute or couple of minutes. But I felt like. I felt like we were leaving humanity behind. I said to him, a lot of people love me. And this moment when I knew that potentially I was about to be killed, that's all that mattered, that I'd been loved. So then he stopped the car and told me to get out. And he walked around to where I was, and he told me to take off my clothes. And I just. I said, God doesn't want you to do this. God doesn't want you to do this. And I did take off my clothes. And, like, I remember that the ATM card fell to the ground, like, in the darkness. And I just thought for, like, a split second that that's how they'll identify my body. That's how they'll know who I was. I didn't want to be raped. And so right then, I just, like, bolted and ran. But he really easily caught up with me and grabbed me. And I could, like, feel the gun, like, pressed against my arm. He was, like, behind me. I think it was right then that I knew, like, I'm going to be raped. I just want to survive. He walked around to where I was, and he told me to Take off my clothes. He started to then, like, take off some of his clothes. And just, like, in that second, I thought, like, if I survive this, I'm going to be a rape victim. He told me right then. He told me to get down on the ground. And as I was doing that, I was still just, like, trying to keep my head together so that I could think. I felt like my only chance for survival was, like, to keep my head together. So I got down on the ground and he raped me. And even during the rape, I just, as much as was possible, tried to mentally disconnect to, like, be someplace else. Like, even, like, as he was on top of me, I was thinking, like, I know I have, like, at least several seconds more to live. I mean, just who knows what you would be thinking about, you know, in that kind of situation? But that's what I was thinking. Like, I just want to survive. I just want to survive. And he said that he wanted me to stand with my back to him. I knew what he was going to do. I knew what was coming. And even though I knew, I knew he was going to shoot me, I was still planning as if I was going to survive that and thinking that I just need to fall and play dead. Like, that was in my head the instant right before it happened. He shot the gun. It went through me, hit me in the back, went through me. I fell to the ground and just played dead. Stayed still, didn't make a sound. He walked closer and stood over me and shot a second time. And I just didn't make a sound. I just kind of let my body roll with the force of the bullet a little bit and back. The second bullet is the one that did the most damage. That bullet went through my lower back, and I knew where it was. I could feel the pressure. It hit my colon, my stomach, my diaphragm, liver and spleen, but thank God it missed my spine and nothing hit my heart. So I heard him start to walk away, but still I was, like, facing away from him. And then I think that it was, like, just to make sure, he turned and shot me one more time. And then he got in the car and drove away, believing that I was dead. I know he thought I was dead. And so then the second that I couldn't hear the car anymore, I was up on my hands and knees, just, like, trying to get a breath at first, just trying to get a breath. Like, it was really hard to breathe. I couldn't get a full breath. I was saying, please, God, help me. Please, God, help Me. And I just. I tried to, like, stand up. I knew I was bleeding, couldn't tell how bad it was. I just knew I'd been shot and I was bleeding. I was thinking about my family and how they were sleeping in their beds a thousand miles away and had no idea what was happening to me. And I was thinking of my baby niece, Jenna, who was three months old at the time. And I was thinking, if I die, she's not going to have any memory of me. And I was thinking, I'm 24. This is not supposed to be the end of my life right now by myself in this place. And then I, like, focused, like your brain takes over in this different kind of way in a crisis situation. And it was just like, what do I need to do? I'm bleeding. I need an ambulance. I need to get to a hospital. I was naked and bloody and kind of scratched up and just completely focused on getting to. Getting back to humanity. I was so afraid that this guy who'd done this to me was just gonna, like, drive by and see me there and finish me off. I just wanted to, like, get to a safe place. So I stood up and took like a few steps and just fell. And then I had this, like, feeling, like this feeling of being overcome with this, like, get to those houses. Get up. And I just stood up. And I feel like somebody shoved me in the exact right direction. I feel like. I feel like God was saying, go now and run. And I did. I ran out of that field. I just ran all the way. I was on my knees and I was like reaching up and ringing this doorbell and, like, banging on the door. And the door opened and this man saw me and he said, oh, my God, get a blanket. And I was just saying. I was just yelling. I was just saying. I was like, no, just call 911. It was almost like, I don't even care that I'm naked was kind of what I was saying. Like, that is so. I don't care. Just call 911. All I was thinking was, I have to get to a hospital. He knew that those were bullet holes instantly because he just. He knew bullet holes. He was a 20 year army veteran of Somalia and the first Gulf War. And this was a soldier who found me on his doorstep. And I have often thought, like, that's exactly who I needed. I needed a soldier. Right then. When you're in a situation where you know that your life is really in danger, you almost tune out the sensory experiences that don't matter and your mind somehow just takes you through it. You say what you have to say, you do what you have to do, and you don't panic.
