Crazy Love Podcast
Episode: Marriage on Mission (Pt. 1) | Francis & Lisa Chan
Date: January 26, 2026
Host: Crazy Love Ministries
Guests: Francis & Lisa Chan
Episode Overview
In this thought-provoking episode, Francis and Lisa Chan reframe the typical conversation around Christian marriage and family. Rather than focusing on personal happiness or even marital unity as primary goals, they call listeners to see marriage as a means to pursue God's kingdom, mission, and glory first. The Chans share personal stories, challenging scripture, and lived experience to invite couples—young and old—to view their relationships in light of eternity, radical discipleship, and the larger mission of God in the world.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Rethinking the Goal of Marriage ([00:05]–[09:04])
- Francis introduces the challenge: Most marriage books and teachings focus on happiness and relationship skills but rarely discuss what Jesus actually says about marriage—and especially about eternity, sacrifice, and judgment.
- Quote: "Imagine if you just took every verse where Jesus mentioned marriage or father, mother, wife, kids, and you just wrote down what Jesus said. It’d be a far cry from a lot of the things we say about marriage." (Francis, [00:55])
- Passages like 1 Corinthians 7:29-35 are highlighted, urging couples to secure "undivided devotion to the Lord," rather than merely pursuing each other.
- Quote: "Those who have wives should live as though they had none… to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord." (Francis quoting Paul, [02:20])
- Francis notes how Christian culture emphasizes promises and blessings, but neglects the scriptural focus on judgment and mission.
- The Chans' experience: Their healthy family and marriage are byproducts of focusing on making disciples and sharing a bigger purpose, not prioritizing romance or conflict resolution techniques.
2. Unity as Byproduct of Mission ([06:24]–[09:04])
- Comparing marriage to a sports team, Francis suggests that the unity and closeness people desire is best formed through a shared external mission, not through self-focus.
- Quote: "The unity isn't something they pursue. It's the byproduct of being on mission together." (Francis, [07:40])
3. Marriage & God’s Glory ([09:04]–[14:39])
- Lisa brings in the themes of seeking God's kingdom first (Matthew 6:33) and doing everything for His glory (Colossians 3:23).
- Quote: "Seek first his kingdom and all these things will be added unto you. And what we do is, we seek first the good marriage..." (Lisa, [09:10])
- She shares a powerful perspective from Joni Eareckson Tada on suffering and God’s glory: satisfaction is found in God, not in one’s circumstances.
- Quote (reading Joni): "'His glory was at stake. And that made my satisfaction in him… the real issue.'" (Lisa, [12:10])
- Lisa challenges listeners to consider: "God’s glory is at stake in your marriage and how you interact… How you respond… God’s glory is at stake." ([10:25])
4. Are You Satisfied in God? ([14:39]–[18:06])
- Francis warns that many marriage problems are actually "God problems." Discontentment and neediness stem from not truly being satisfied in Christ as the Bible describes in Psalm 23.
- Quote: "So many marriage problems are not really marriage problems. They're God problems." (Francis, [15:38])
- Challenge: Even a "fun" or harmonious marriage can be "absolutely worthless" if it's not engaged in Christ's mission.
5. Stories of Sacrifice & Eternal Mindset ([18:06]–[29:40])
- Lisa recalls being called to a more sacrificial lifestyle after Francis’ trip to Africa—downsizing their home and giving away possessions. She admits initial reluctance but testifies to the freedom and joy that followed.
- Quote: "There’s so much beauty in just the surrender… to my husband and to the Lord." (Lisa, [20:32])
- Francis elaborates on how the American dream (“buy as much house as you can”) conflicts with the biblical call to self-emptying and denying oneself, as modeled by Jesus.
- The couple share about leaving their long-term church and trusting God with their children’s uprooting; Lisa particularly highlights the importance of showing children that obedience to God comes before family comfort.
6. Living and Teaching Sacrifice to Children ([29:40]–[36:05])
- Moving testimony about Brad & Beth Buzer, missionaries in Papua New Guinea, and how their children witnessed their parents’ total commitment to the gospel.
- Quote (Buzer): "I could look my kids in the eye when they turned 18… and say, you saw how mom and I risked everything for the gospel, even your lives. There was nothing more beautiful than the gospel to us. Now go and do the same." (Francis, [31:09])
- The Chans desire to set this legacy, picturing a "happily ever after" as being reunited in eternity after a life of sacrifice.
- Lisa likens their marriage to "The Amazing Race"—focused on the mission, not satisfaction or comfort, and always on the move for God's purposes.
7. Radical Hospitality & Mission as a Family ([36:05]–[41:25])
- The Chans share practical examples: fostering a 16-year-old while Lisa was pregnant, their children leading and serving in church, and the unity that arises from shared mission.
- Quote: "Yeah, we don't have date night every week… but we're on the mission together." (Francis, [38:49])
- Francis emphasizes that true closeness in the family is built through mission and sacrifice, not just family rituals.
8. Impact Beyond the Home ([41:25]–[45:36])
- The Chans reflect on how proceeds from their book “You and Me Forever” have aided feeding programs and women rescued from sex trafficking in East Africa, creating lasting change.
- Quote: "We want you guys to know where your inheritance went." (Francis, joking, [42:34])
- Lisa movingly describes visiting the women’s home and witnessing the transformation of lives. Their children identify this as the most impactful part of their mission trip.
- Final encouragement: God is at work around the world, so don't lose heart or focus—keep seeking His kingdom.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- Francis ([00:55]): "Imagine if you just took every verse where Jesus mentioned marriage or father, mother, wife, kids, and you just wrote down what Jesus said… it’s a far cry from a lot of the things we say about marriage."
- Lisa ([09:10]): "Seek first his kingdom and all these things will be added unto you. And what we do is, we seek first the good marriage… instead of seeking first his kingdom."
- Francis ([15:38]): "So many marriage problems are not really marriage problems. They're God problems."
- Lisa ([20:32]): "There’s so much beauty in just the surrender… to my husband and to the Lord."
- Francis ([31:09]): "'You saw how mom and I risked everything for the gospel, even your lives. There was nothing more beautiful than the gospel to us. Now go and do the same.'"
- Lisa ([36:19]): "Being married to Francis… feels like a lifelong episode of The Amazing Race."
- Francis ([38:49]): "Yeah, we don't have date night every week… but we're on the mission together."
- Lisa ([44:43]): "What a privilege. And you can know with confidence that God is at work… keep fighting for what is on God's heart."
- Francis ([43:15]): "You see how full this life is. Go and do the same… invest in the kingdom and you'll be grateful forever."
Key Timestamps
- 00:05–09:04 | Introduction; challenging traditional Christian views on marriage
- 09:04–14:39 | Lisa on kingdom focus and God’s glory in marriage
- 14:39–18:06 | Francis: Satisfaction in God as foundation for marriage
- 18:06–29:40 | Personal stories of financial and lifestyle sacrifice for mission
- 29:40–36:05 | Teaching children eternal values through radical choices
- 36:05–41:25 | Radical hospitality and family unity through mission
- 41:25–45:36 | Impact of missions and book proceeds; encouragement to listeners
Final Encouragement
The episode closes with an invitation to listeners to join in God's work—whether in marriage, family, or mission—to find their deepest satisfaction in Him, not in fleeting happiness or traditional family goals.
Francis ([45:36]): "It would take hours to download everything we've experienced and want to share with you… but hopefully it's gotten your marriage and your family on the mission that God's called you to."
Resource: For more, visit youandmeforever.org.
