Podcast Summary

Criminal – "The Speeding Duck, the Hungry Javelina, and ‘Leonardo da Pinchy’"
Host: Phoebe Judge
Release Date: December 19, 2025
Episode Theme:
A whimsical, end-of-year collection of true animal antics, featuring tales of wildlife and pets caught in the act of mischief, heroism, and improbable adventure. True to Criminal's spirit, these stories sit at the intersection of the absurd, the heartwarming, and the criminally odd.

Main Themes and Structure

• Animal encounters with the law and public life, often in ways that echo human foibles or legal systems.
• The blurring line between animals doing "wrong" and their inherent nature.
• Community, humor, and the unexpected ways animals weave into human stories.
• The show's annual tradition of an "animals" episode.

Key Stories & Insights

1. The Speeding Duck of Koenitz, Switzerland

[00:49–04:20]

Overview:

A duck is caught by a speed camera, “speeding” through an empty street at 52 km/h, far above the car limit of 30 km/h.

Notables:

• Sven Montgomery (police chief near Bern) recounts the episode:
  • "There is a duck on the photo." – Sven [01:44]
  • The duck outpaced the local speed limit and would have incurred a "heavy penalty" had it been able to pay.
  • The police keep a “hall of fame” of unusual speed camera pictures, featuring the duck alongside local Santa Claus photos—and even photos of Sven himself cycling too fast.
• Quote:
  “‘Normally if you compare it to a car driver, it would have given a report to the public prosecutor... I think the duck would have lost the driving license and even fine, like much more than thousand Swiss francs.’” – Sven [02:33]
• The comical anthropomorphism—discussing punishments as if the duck were a driver—reflects the light tone.

2. The Hungry Javelina in the Subaru

[06:32–10:33]

Overview:

A javelina gets trapped in a car after a midnight Cheetos heist in Cornville, Arizona. The animal inadvertently releases the handbrake and rolls the car into a grove.

Notables:

• Sgt. Zebediah Dickinson (Yavapai County Sheriff’s Office):
  • Recounts finding the javelina and the puzzle of how the car rolled away.
  • "There was a bag of Cheetos that were inside the car. So... the javelina was having a midnight snack, for lack of better terms." [08:36]
  • Used a rope to open the hatch from inside his patrol car to avoid confronting the angry, “snarling” javelina.
  • "After that initial walking up to the car and it trying to, like, I don't say eat me, but it felt that way through the window. I erred on the side of caution." [09:41]
  • Damage included chewed seats, dashboards, and devoured snacks.
• The incident blends animal cunning with slapstick misadventure, and showcases the unusual calls police must sometimes answer.

3. The Doorbell-Ringing Slug in Bavaria, Germany

[10:33–13:13]

Overview:

Residents of an apartment are repeatedly alarmed by nighttime doorbell-ringing, only to discover a slug sliming its way across the panel.

Notables:

• Investigations escalate as suspicion falls on pranksters.
• The culprit: a slime-trailing slug, “relocated” by police after “being taught about boundaries.”
• Tone: Dry humor in the escalation and gentle treatment of the slug.

4. Joshua the Marathon Goat, Newfoundland

[14:12–20:26]

Overview:

A beloved farm goat, Joshua, escapes and spontaneously joins a community half-marathon, running 5km and crossing the finish line to a hero’s welcome.

Notables:

• Heidi Taylor (Joshua's owner):
  • “He’s walked with a leash, but even though there’s a leash on him, I don’t hold it. Joshua walks with me by my side, and when I turn around to come back, he’ll come back.” [15:19]
  • The local community tracks Joshua via social media and crossing guards.
  • Runners slow down for him, he’s protected by participants, and is “awarded a medal” at the finish.
  • Quote: “He just wanted to run.” – Heidi [18:32]
  • Becomes local celebrity—people participate in the race hoping to run with him.
• A heartwarming tale of animal agency and community joy.

5. Ray Ray the Traveling Cat, Pennsylvania/New Hampshire

[20:26–24:53]

Overview:

Ray Ray, the family cat, survives a 105-mile, two-hour trip clinging to the roof of the family van, unnoticed, and emerges unfazed at a rest stop.

Notables:

• Tony and Margaret DiNardo and daughter Sophia:
  • “I just at first couldn’t believe it. And then I started laughing.” – Tony [21:56]
  • Cat stretches, strolls, and later takes part in vacation family activities—including crossing a marathon finish line with Tony.
  • No one on the highway notices or alerts the family.
  • The story is told with disbelief, relief, and humor about the cat’s tenacity and luck.

6. The Polite Black Bear at Sequoia Park Zoo, California

[27:06–31:18]

Overview:

Christine Noel from Sequoia Park Zoo finds a wild black bear strolling the zoo’s elevated pathways, calmly observing resident bears and never trying to join them.

Notables:

• The bear enters via a tree over the barbed-wire fence; zookeepers use air horns and leaf blowers to guide him out without incident.
  • “At one point he laid down and looked like he was getting ready to just take a nap.” – Christine [28:54]
  • Staff joke the zoo is “full,” and the bear is a “very polite visitor.”
• Zoo has plans for animal escapes, but not for wildlife breaking in.

7. Leonardo da Pinchy: The Kleptomaniac Cat, Auckland, New Zealand

[31:52–37:16]

Overview:

Leo (a.k.a. Leonardo da Pinchy), a small but mighty cat, becomes infamous for daily and nightly thefts of socks, clothes, and stuffed animals from up to 40 neighboring households.

Notables:

• Helen North, his owner, and affected neighbor Wendy Ballard:
  • “He has come back quite often, takes things off the clothesline. ... He has definitely taken other neighbors’ underwear.” – Wendy [34:22]
  • The family manages a neighborhood WhatsApp group for the restitution of stolen items, sharing weekly photos of Leo’s latest haul.
  • Neighbors are delighted with their local “cat burglar.”
• Quote: "The house comes with the cat burglar, so hopefully he'll visit you." [35:13]
• Story highlights both the nuisance and neighborly communion arising from Leo’s antics.

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• "There is a duck on the photo." — Sven Montgomery [01:44]
• “If you compare it to a car driver, ... the duck would have lost the driving license and even fine, like much more than thousand Swiss francs.” — Sven Montgomery [02:33]
• "The javelina was having a midnight snack. For lack of better terms." — Sgt. Zebediah Dickinson [08:36]
• "After that initial walking up to the car and it trying to, like, I don't say eat me, but it felt that way through the window." — Sgt. Zebediah Dickinson [09:41]
• (On Joshua the goat) "He just wanted to run." — Heidi Taylor [18:32]
• (On Ray Ray the cat) “He was just standing on the van like he normally would ... He was just walking in circles, rubbing his head against the luggage like nothing had happened.” – Tony DiNardo [22:22]
• “At one point he laid down and looked like he was getting ready to just take a nap.” — Christine Noel [28:54]
• “He has come back quite often, takes things off the clothesline, so does fixate on my husband's socks. ... He has definitely taken other neighbors’ underwear.” — Wendy Ballard [34:22]
• "The house comes with the cat burglar, so hopefully he'll visit you." — Helen North [35:13]

Tone & Style

• Gently humorous, empathetic storytelling.
• Anthropomorphism, but with self-aware irony.
• Community and kindness as undercurrents: from neighbors tracking a goat to Facebook groups for stolen socks.
• In keeping with Criminal’s roots, animals run afoul of—or become victims of—rules built for humans, but always retain their innocence.

Timestamps of Key Segments

| Story | Start | End | |--------------------------------------|---------|---------| | Speeding Duck, Switzerland | 00:46 | 04:20 | | Hungry Javelina, Arizona | 06:32 | 10:33 | | Doorbell Slug, Germany | 10:33 | 13:13 | | Marathon Goat, Newfoundland | 14:12 | 20:26 | | Road Trip Cat, USA | 20:26 | 24:53 | | Polite Bear, California | 27:06 | 31:18 | | Kleptomaniac Cat, New Zealand | 31:52 | 37:16 |

Final Thoughts

This episode of Criminal encapsulates everything listeners love about the show: the intersection of law, mischief, absurdity, and community—but filtered through unexpectedly touching stories centered on animals whose actions seem both criminal and charming. The annual animal episode cements itself as a joyful, much-loved tradition, perfect for closing out the year.