Criminal Podcast Summary Episode: Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
Host: Phoebe Judge
Release Date: December 20, 2024

1. Cecil the Money-Eating Dog

In this intriguing segment, hosts Carrie and Clayton Law recount the bewildering incident of their dog, Cecil, who devoured $4,000 in cash. The story begins when Clayton withdrew a large sum in various denominations to pay fence installers. Upon returning home, they discovered the money scattered and partially consumed by their 100-pound Goldendoodle.

“And I just kind of had a WTF moment and it was hard for me to process what I was looking at.” [03:08] — Carrie

Realizing the severity of the situation, they contacted the bank, which initially found the claim hard to believe. Through meticulous effort, they managed to piece together shredded bills using tape and managed to exchange approximately $3,500 back.

“We were never mad at him. We were like, looking at this dog, knowing that there's a few thousand dollars inside of him.” [09:19] — Cecil (Clayton)

The ordeal not only strained their finances but also tested their patience and resourcefulness in handling an unexpected canine misadventure.

2. Cicadas Mistaken for Alien Spaceships

Phoebe Judge narrates a peculiar occurrence in Durham, North Carolina, and Newberry, South Carolina, where residents reported incessant noises resembling alien spaceships and industrial machines. The confusion stemmed from an unprecedented emergence of cicadas, with two species appearing simultaneously for the first time since Thomas Jefferson's presidency.

“There were trillions of them. They find their mates by being very, very loud.” [12:15] — Phoebe Judge

The relentless buzzing led to numerous 911 calls, prompting authorities to investigate. Eventually, it was determined that the source of the disturbances was the natural chorus of cicadas, assuring the public that, while annoying, they posed no danger.

3. Zoe the Surprise Possum

In North Ridgeville, Ohio, Police Sergeant Demir Kaduzevich responded to an unusual call about a pig following a woman walking home. Upon arrival, officers discovered that the pig in question was actually the woman's dog, Eight, who had escaped and startled a passerby.

“They were looking for Zoe, someone's pet who dug her way out of a fenced-in yard and taken herself for a walk.” [14:22] — Carrie

The mix-up highlighted the challenges law enforcement faces with unexpected wildlife encounters and the importance of clear communication during emergencies.

4. Vinnie the Curry-Covered Herring Gull

Steve Smith and Louise Brown from Tiggy Winkles Wildlife Hospital in England discuss the rescue of Vinnie, a herring gull found drenched in curry powder. Initially mistaken for an exotic bird due to his vibrant coloration, Vinnie turned out to be a common herring gull that had likely become trapped in a seasoning drum.

“The whole hospital smelled a smell of curry powder. You came through the door and you felt like someone was cooking.” [40:04] — Carrie

After meticulous cleaning and multiple baths to remove the persistent curry residue, Vinnie was released back into the wild. His story underscores the hospital's dedication to treating a wide array of wildlife, from bats to toads.

5. Megaturtle's Toilet Trouble

Patrick McKnight shares the chaotic tale of Megaturtle, a 31-year-old tortoise whose attempts to patrol his home led to significant household damage. During renovations, Megaturtle knocked over a toilet, causing water to flood the floor and scattering lettuce pieces around.

“He got himself kind of stuck and literally just brute forced his way unstuck and the toilet was an unfortunate casualty.” [32:29] — Patrick McKnight

The incident not only required extensive repairs but also highlighted the challenges of accommodating long-lived pets like tortoises, with plans in place to relocate Megaturtle to a local zoo should the family be unable to care for him in the future.

6. Brett Ingram’s Possum Encounter

Brett Ingram narrates her unsettling experience with a possum that ventured into her home during the night. While dealing with a new baby and other pets, Brett found the possum hiding in her Christmas tree, leading to a frantic attempt to remove the animal without harm.

“He was looking at me. So I kind of backed up and went around to the front of the tree and looked through, and that's when I saw its face and realized what was in my tree.” [46:43] — Brett Ingram

Despite challenges, including the possum's defensive behavior, Brett successfully removed the animal, emphasizing the unpredictable nature of wildlife encounters in residential settings.

Conclusion

This episode of Criminal delves into a series of extraordinary animal-related incidents that blur the lines between chaos, misadventure, and unexpected challenges faced by ordinary people. From money-eating dogs to curry-covered gulls, each story underscores the unpredictable nature of human-animal interactions and the resilience required to navigate such unusual circumstances.

Notable Quotes:

• “We were never mad at him.” — Cecil, the money-eating dog [09:19]

• “They find their mates by being very, very loud.” — Phoebe Judge on cicadas [12:15]

• “The whole hospital smelled a smell of curry powder.” — Carrie on Vinnie the gull [40:04]

About Criminal: Criminal is a groundbreaking podcast by Vox Media that explores stories about people who’ve done wrong, been wronged, or caught in the middle. Hosted by Phoebe Judge, it's been recognized as a Best Podcast of 2023 by the New York Times.

For more information, visit thisiscriminal.com or follow Criminal on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.