A Goblin By Any Other Name | Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode | Episode 14

Summary

Podcast Summary: Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry

Episode Title: A Goblin By Any Other Name | Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode | Episode 14
Release Date: January 20, 2025
Hosts: Amy Vorpahl (Dungeon Master), Jason Nguyen (Tippy), Danielle Radford (Busy), Dan Casey (Fibs)
Description: In this episode of Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode, the trio of goblins—Tippy, Busy, and Fibs—navigate their newfound autonomy after the disappearance of their necromancer. Led by Dungeon Master Amy Vorpahl, they venture into a murky swamp, encounter various goblin tribes, and prepare to participate in the renowned Goblin Games.

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1. Entering the Swamp

The episode opens with the goblins transitioning from their dungeon confines into a swampy environment through a green and brown portal. The discomfort of the new portal is palpable as they describe feeling "suspended in, like, mud" and being "squeezed out and dumped into this muddy swamp" (02:54).

Notable Quote:

Amy Vorpahl (05:10): "You notice that this environment smells of, of course, old earth, but also mossy rot, sulfur, sweaty meat, and the metallic smell of blood."

2. Discovering the Goblin Games

Upon arriving in the swamp, the goblins quickly become aware of a massive goblin celebration—the Goblin Games. Amy introduces the concept of participants needing a Bannerman and a Yeller Hauler, explaining their roles in championing the goblins competing.

Notable Quote:

Amy Vorpahl (07:45): "This might be Maya Finn, do I know anything about Myrefin? As a goblin, I'm gonna say no, not particularly."

3. Preparing for Competition

Focusing on strategy, the goblins decide to enter the Goblin Games. Danielle (Busy) volunteers to be the Yeller Hauler, responsible for rallying support and announcing competitors, while Dan (Fibs) takes on the role of Bannerman, tasked with garnering crowd favor.

Notable Quote:

Danielle Radford (14:03): "We are fibs and busy. And I also made a vow. And my vow is that I am going to be selfless. And that is my new goal."

4. Crafting the Banner

Dan showcases his artistic skills by creating a banner depicting their team—Tippy Terror Squad—featuring a spider wielding multiple guns and a clipboard, symbolizing their blend of terror and organization.

Notable Quote:

Dan Casey (39:31): "It's definitely a biologically accurate phase fighter. A rendition of my niece Luff, wielding not one, not two, but seven guns and one clipboard that represents the terror she will wreak upon this land."

5. Engaging with Fellow Goblins

The goblins interact with various participants, including Plixie and Pekara, building alliances and understanding their competition. Tippy grapples with past conflicts, particularly with his estranged siblings, Juc and Tog.

Notable Quote:

Jason Nguyen (25:34): "If there's any more of that, you can come by my camp and try to recruit us."

6. The Goblin Games Challenges

Amy outlines the challenges of the Goblin Games:

• Go Night Night: A timing game where goblins must enter a circle when music stops to avoid being outed.
• Umbaba Dance: A chaotic and energetic dance requiring unpredictability.
• Frog Busting: Competitors must catch and ride a froghemoth.
• Secret Challenge: Details undisclosed, adding an element of surprise.

Notable Quote:

Amy Vorpahl (27:32): "Go Night Night is a game of timing where you will be outside of a circle with a group of other Goblins, and the music will be playing. And when the playing stops, you need to find yourself inside the circle as soon as possible."

7. Strategic Alliances and Bets

Dan places a significant bet on Tippy to win the Games, hoping to secure more resources and support. Amy mentions the unpredictable nature of the judge, Glomgan Mosspronk, emphasizing the need for strategic planning.

Notable Quote:

Dan Casey (60:06): "I believe in you. And I would like to place a bet on you taking home the title."

8. Romantic Tensions and Revelations

A subplot unfolds as Tippy attempts to reconcile with Pekara, expressing his fears and desire to protect her. Their emotional exchange reveals Tippy’s vulnerabilities and his struggle with past traumas.

Notable Quote:

Jason Nguyen (88:33): "I love you. And because I love you, I'm scared. And because I'm scared, I don't think I can be with you because it kind of feels like death follows me around."

9. Judge Glomgan's Favor

As the episode progresses towards the climax, Amy announces that Pekara Donknazzo has won Judge Glomgan’s favor by performing a playful gesture, causing mixed reactions among the goblins.

Notable Quote:

Amy Vorpahl (91:09): "The person who shall gain Blomkin's favor tomorrow is Pekara Donknazzo, for she gave the judge Glomgan a wet willy."

10. Conclusion and Next Steps

The episode concludes with preparations for the upcoming challenges and reflections on the day's events. The goblins are poised to face their fears and leverage their strengths in the Goblin Games.

Notable Quote:

Amy Vorpahl (91:30): "As you are dealing with some complicated emotions, that is where we will end this episode."

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Key Takeaways and Insights

• Autonomy and Leadership: The goblins take control of their destiny, highlighting themes of leadership and self-determination.
• Strategy and Teamwork: Emphasis on roles (Bannerman vs. Yeller Hauler) showcases the importance of strategic planning and collaboration.
• Personal Growth: Characters confront their pasts and work towards personal development, particularly Tippy's journey.
• Cultural Depth: The portrayal of goblin traditions and the Goblin Games enriches the narrative with cultural nuances.
• Emotional Complexity: The romantic subplot adds depth to character interactions, illustrating the balance between duty and personal emotions.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Amy Vorpahl (05:10):
  "You notice that this environment smells of, of course, old earth, but also mossy rot, sulfur, sweaty meat, and the metallic smell of blood."

• Danielle Radford (14:03):
  "We are fibs and busy. And I also made a vow. And my vow is that I am going to be selfless. And that is my new goal."

• Dan Casey (39:31):
  "It's definitely a biologically accurate phase fighter. A rendition of my niece Luff, wielding not one, not two, but seven guns and one clipboard that represents the terror she will wreak upon this land."

• Jason Nguyen (25:34):
  "If there's any more of that, you can come by my camp and try to recruit us."

• Dan Casey (60:06):
  "I believe in you. And I would like to place a bet on you taking home the title."

• Jason Nguyen (88:33):
  "I love you. And because I love you, I'm scared. And because I'm scared, I don't think I can be with you because it kind of feels like death follows me around."

• Amy Vorpahl (91:09):
  "The person who shall gain Blomkin's favor tomorrow is Pekara Donknazzo, for she gave the judge Glomgan a wet willy."

---

Conclusion

Episode 14 of Sagas of Sundry: Goblin Mode intricately weaves themes of autonomy, strategy, and personal growth against the vibrant backdrop of goblin culture and competition. The goblins' journey through the swamp and their preparation for the Goblin Games offer listeners a rich narrative filled with humor, tension, and emotional depth.

Transcript

[Dan Casey]

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[Amy Vorpahl]

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[Jason Nguyen]

He came by my school for career day and said he was a big roas man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laugh at me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You'Ll be able to reach people who do.

[Jason Nguyen]

Get a $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com results to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn the place to be to be.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Hello everyone and welcome back to Sagas of Sundry Goblin Mode. I'm your dungeon master, Amy Vorpahl, and with me, as always, is our minions of Mayhem, AKA our Terror squad, played by.

[Dan Casey]

Hi, I'm Dan Casey, the artist formerly known as Fil Verrel Duskbranch. But you may know me better as Fibs, a Skeleton wizard.

[Danielle Radford]

And I am Danielle Radford. I play Busy, formerly known as Flesh Bizzy, who is a skeleton, who is a bard Rogue multi class baby couldn't do that in life, only in death.

[Jason Nguyen]

Hey, I'm Jason Nguyen. I play Tippy, a goblin artificer formerly known as your friendly ghost.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That's right. And with all of that said, I think it might be time to part the veil of reality. And we're no longer experiencing a lovely spring day in Los Angeles. Just feeling the morning upon us Lots of possibilities ahead in our lives. No. Instead, we're feeling zero possibilities. No.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, God damn, zero.

[Danielle Radford]

That is not good.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Party ruined.

[Jason Nguyen]

Can we round up?

[Amy Vorpahl]

We are feeling different sorts of possibilities as one of us has been resurrected and come back to life. And two of us have metaphorically and literally thrown away and burned away our pasts. The possibilities that are open to us now are through a portal. And this portal is extraordinarily different from the last portal that you went through. The colors in this portal are green and brown and murky. And this time it's actually pretty uncomfortable. You can breathe. Ow, ow, ow. Oh, good. Murky. Ow.

[Dan Casey]

It's too green.

[Amy Vorpahl]

It's really uncomfortable. You feel this sense of weightlessness, but it's more being suspended in, like, mud. And while you can breathe, the air and everything around you does feel like it's growing and squeezing you. It is getting tighter and tighter. There is less of a confusion about how much time is passing. Very little time is passing, but it's. You yourself might feel like you're the pimple being squeezed out until you are. You're squeezed out and you're dumped into this muddy swamp. And you're squeezed out so fast and hard that you skid over the surface of this muddy swamp and you take in a bunch of grass and dirt and mud on your skin.

[Jason Nguyen]

It's been so long since I've seen Bud.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, you feel just right at home.

[Jason Nguyen]

This is perfect.

[Dan Casey]

That was kind of thick for a portal.

[Jason Nguyen]

Quick, rub it all over yourselves. It'll keep the bugs from biting you. And I wait. Tippy sort of just rolls around in the mud.

[Dan Casey]

Hippy nippy.

[Danielle Radford]

Is this what hair is like? Looks at all the grass. Oh, look at me. I'm human. I have hair.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You get a. You no longer care, but you do get a flashback of your girlfriend who turned into a dirt mound.

[Dan Casey]

I thought I'd burned that one away, but guess not.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You notice that this environment smells of, of course, old earth, but also mossy rot, sulfur, sweaty meat, and the metallic smell of blood.

[Jason Nguyen]

Smell that sweaty beet. We're in a meat swamp.

[Amy Vorpahl]

With you are Crandall, whose ethereal suit that he built for himself is no longer there. And he's back in a bikini, just as Picara is also in a shell bikini. And Luff is also with you as you enter the swamp. Nothing of note, really, to see around you. Everyone roll a perception check.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, jeez.

[Danielle Radford]

Nat 20 says 22.

[Jason Nguyen]

Let's go.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. Very easily.

[Danielle Radford]

I proceed.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You do perceive that in the distance Something is going on in the distance. It'd be difficult for you to know exactly what, but it seems like many goblin voices.

[Danielle Radford]

Do y'all hear that?

[Dan Casey]

No, I'm still staring at the swamp because I rolled a five.

[Jason Nguyen]

I tried to do the thing where I feel like the dirt and know what it is, but it's just dirt.

[Danielle Radford]

Busy's just, like, slowly picking herself off of the dirt and, like, trying to rub and take as much of it off. No, I hear voices. I hear. Not to be a total Maxwell here, but it kind of sounds like goblins. I don't want to generalize.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, Gagongin said that he was putting us in a portal near Fitfell Delve. This might be Maya Finn, do I.

[Jason Nguyen]

Know anything about Mirefin?

[Amy Vorpahl]

As a goblin, I'm gonna say no, not particularly Myrefin.

[Jason Nguyen]

I've never heard of a Mirefin.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, if we're near Myrefin, I might not go back immediately. I don't know.

[Dan Casey]

Are you from this part originally?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. What do you know about Myerfin?

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, I'm not from Myrefin, but it's a hub for goblins. Always a good time. Almost a retreat sort of place. But also, I mean, a huge spectacle land and knowing what we know about each other. And I might be going back to the Mark. I might need to ask for me gun back.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That was really to lend to you during that heist.

[Jason Nguyen]

I've grown quite fond of it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

But, I mean, if you need it. It's just. It's part of my collection and seems as though we're not gonna be seeing each other all the time anymore, so I might need it. I know you might need it, too, but it's up to you, I guess, is what I mean.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tippi sort of looks at the gun sadly, and thinks about everything that's happened so far. And then he thinks about not being able to use it to protect her. And he goes, honestly, I'm probably better off without it. And I hand it to Tipping Cora.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Thanks. Something that Marked will be able to use in the future. But you handled it very well. And thanks for the upgrade.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're welcome.

[Amy Vorpahl]

She goes, I might need to do like you did. And she rubs herself in the mud and the grass and everything and looks a little more clothed.

[Jason Nguyen]

Dippy sort of wanders off sort of ahead of the pack, if we're moving. Yeah, sort of. Just kind of lonely on his own. Kicking rocks along the way.

[Danielle Radford]

Busy's gonna go up a little ahead and go walk up To Tippi.

[Jason Nguyen]

Hey. Busy.

[Danielle Radford]

Hey, Tippi. Big day, huh?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Danielle Radford]

So I just know that the gun was something very important to you, and it must probably really hard for you to let the gun go.

[Jason Nguyen]

I just feel somehow less confident.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

Without it.

[Danielle Radford]

Because it seemed like you were really attached to the gun and, like, maybe you had something that could have been really special with the gun.

[Jason Nguyen]

It just seems like I'm not worthy of holding the gun. Going on long walks with the gun, maybe kissing the gun, just. Yeah. Not worthy.

[Danielle Radford]

I mean, you could probably ask the gun what the gun thinks. Really, Instead of making decisions for the gun. You could probably ask the gun if the gun. I don't know, if the gun agrees.

[Jason Nguyen]

What if the gun finds a better gun owner? You know? Like, what if the gun finds somebody that could protect the gun and is strong and heroic and tall.

[Danielle Radford]

I think that the gun likes the person that was wielding the gun already. I think the gun saw that the person that was firing it was already pretty darn heroic.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, the gun's. The gun's wrong because the gun owner before wasn't heroic. The gun owner before died, and then in the spirit realm, almost died again. So. You know what? Yeah. Maybe this is for the best.

[Danielle Radford]

Okay.

[Jason Nguyen]

What's best for the gun?

[Danielle Radford]

Maybe the gun also gets a choice. But also, I mean, everyone dies. I'm super dead. But that doesn't mean I can't still go out and do good, heroic things just cause I'm, like, really super and for, like, the dumbest reason.

[Jason Nguyen]

But, Bizzy, you're so confident. You have that clipboard. You're always walking around knowing what you're doing, making lists. I'm not like. You busy? I'm. I'm me. I'm sweaty. I apparently die really easily.

[Danielle Radford]

Flesh. Flesh. That's a flesh thing now?

[Jason Nguyen]

I really thought for a second there, when I stood up to Lux here, that you would. You would be intimidated by me. I mean, we are the Terror squad.

[Danielle Radford]

We are the Terror Squad.

[Jason Nguyen]

And before I knew it, I was somewhere far away in the void and I was alone. It was so good to see you guys there. But I was so scared we wouldn't.

[Danielle Radford]

Have been anywhere else. And, you know, while we were taking care of our really lame past alive selves, someone was sticking around, making sure that everything went the way it needed to so that you could come back.

[Jason Nguyen]

You know what? I haven't given this person enough credit. Yeah, I haven't been asking this person what they want. Yes, I need to say sorry to Loof. No Loof. Where's loof. Loof. Loof.

[Amy Vorpahl]

She's with. Yeah, she's with. Fibs.

[Dan Casey]

Pops out of my cage now the size of a melon, you said?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. Luz grown.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, Lu has grown. She is still a bun. So she is able to squeeze within the. But yeah, it's just gonna. If she tries to squeeze out of his mouth, it's gonna be a huge jaw dropping moment. Unky Tippy.

[Jason Nguyen]

I go up to Luff and I hold her two little metal prosthetic spider hands that I've made for her and I go, louf. I haven't given you the proper respect that you deserve. You know, when you started calling me Unki, I just thought it was just kinda weird. Like kind of a weird word to call any family member. But like, now I understand that. You're a really loyal spider, aren't you?

[Amy Vorpahl]

I am. I am terribly loyal.

[Jason Nguyen]

You're the most terrible. And you know what? You got a good actual unky. You're unky. Fibs.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, yes.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. So I promised I would make you a little web shooter and I will. And I use magical tinkering to make a tiny little webs gun web pistol for Luff.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Perfect. That's wonderful. Thank you, Hunky Tippy. This will accessorize nicely with the plans I have for this entire world.

[Jason Nguyen]

You keep dreaming big, Luff.

[Dan Casey]

Maybe not too big. My ribcage is getting pretty crowded.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, we also haven't had a chance to talk. Like you guys were enemies. You killed each other. Honestly, I didn't want to see that flashback, but we all did the love thing and then touched the orb, so I had to be there.

[Dan Casey]

But I got this weird image in my head. But it's mostly good.

[Jason Nguyen]

How do you guys feel?

[Danielle Radford]

That doesn't even feel like that's me.

[Dan Casey]

That was them.

[Danielle Radford]

That was them.

[Dan Casey]

That was Phil, Varel and Berygneus.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, they were so unable to get through their weird games that they weren't able to see anything beyond that. And they died like dip.

[Dan Casey]

Yeah.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh my God, they died like the dumbest people. They're so stupid.

[Jason Nguyen]

You guys are still them.

[Danielle Radford]

Nope, nope, nope.

[Dan Casey]

We're fibs and busy.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, we are fibs and busy. And I also, I made a vow. And my vow is that I am going to be selfless. And that is my new goal. I can't think of any way that I could fulfill my goals easier than being selfless.

[Jason Nguyen]

I made a vow to protect you both. And I'll do that at any cost.

[Dan Casey]

I made a vow to stop Lux Here.

[Jason Nguyen]

Stop.

[Dan Casey]

The site of Aurelia.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay, let's talk about that. Cause he whooped our asses real bad.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, he killed me real bad.

[Jason Nguyen]

He had a lot of buddies.

[Dan Casey]

I maybe have some thoughts on our tactical prowess. Maybe next time we'll either stay together or have a single chat before we rush in.

[Danielle Radford]

Just like one talk. Maybe just like you.

[Dan Casey]

Maybe just a quick a pre Russian sidebar probably would have solved a lot of fatal questions.

[Amy Vorpahl]

As you are discussing your distant and not so distant pasts, you come upon an enormous goblin celebration. You're still far enough away that no one might perceive you, but it looks massive. You've been to some goblin celebrations and this does seem bigger. This isn't one tribe. This is many tribes of goblins.

[Dan Casey]

Is this some kind of Mardi Groblin celebration?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, it's sort of like a coming together of tribes. You know what I mean? Like a big gob parade. Big gob fest.

[Danielle Radford]

What do they do with the gob fest?

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, that's what I'm worried about. Cause it gets a bit rowdy.

[Dan Casey]

We can party.

[Amy Vorpahl]

We're in her car, actually, while you're talking, she goes, I don't think that's what this is.

[Jason Nguyen]

What is it?

[Amy Vorpahl]

If we're talking about myrefin, some of those customs that you're used to within different swamps, they're just not the same here. And I think we might have stumbled upon a game situation. Oh my gosh. What are you doing here? And as she looks over, you see Plixie.

[Jason Nguyen]

Plixie.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Plixie is here. You're alive. Hey.

[Jason Nguyen]

Because of us.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Her sister goblin. And she goes, Pekora. It's been so long. It's been a couple of weeks actually. And we thought you were dead. I came here. I'm so happy to see you. And near Pekora is Fug.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh God.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And Fug doesn't do anything much of anything. He's just kind of hanging out there. But Plexi goes, so I mean, you're here. I mean, are you participating in the Goblin Hero Games? And Pekora goes, I don't even know anything about that. Are you? And Blixie goes, yeah, I'm gonna throw me out in the ring. You know, this is the biggest Goblin games they've had in a really long time, actually. That opened it up to all tribes. I mean, I feel like it's been 10 years since they've done something like this.

[Danielle Radford]

I'm sorry. Busy. Takes out her clipboard. Click, click. What exactly is a Goblins game?

[Jason Nguyen]

Goblin Games are just.

[Amy Vorpahl]

It could be every so often. I mean, sometimes within the tribe, it determines who's the best goblin. And they're named the Goblin Hero.

[Jason Nguyen]

Ah, it's a real gun measuring contest.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I mean, we've never had a big one like this in a really long time. So, yeah, this one is gonna determine who the Goblin Hero is. Apparently someone big and important put it together.

[Danielle Radford]

Really? So this is like, for the big and important Goblin Hero. Are they setting up now or did it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, they're signing up now. Tomorrow is the games.

[Danielle Radford]

Tomorrow is the games.

[Dan Casey]

Fibs turns to Crandall and says, did Unzug do this?

[Amy Vorpahl]

This is where Unzug wanted me to meet him.

[Dan Casey]

He wanted you to meet him at the Goblin. At the Goblin Games. Here at Mayafin. He said May adjacent to Finn Fettledelve.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He said Maya Finn. Yes. And he has mentioned Fitfedald Delf quite a few times. But, yes, I will be looking for Unzoog. As this so thing happens, the winner.

[Danielle Radford]

Of these Goblin Games. Are they gonna get to meet Unzuk?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Maybe.

[Jason Nguyen]

What's the prize?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. Oh, we'd have to enter and find out. I don't know. Plixie says. I've done a bit of research and it seems as though. Yeah, you get your standard magical weapon and you get the title and the notoriety.

[Dan Casey]

I bet you could win this.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, I don't know what's involved in the Goblin Games. I might not be the Goblin for that.

[Danielle Radford]

And who better than you?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Pekara says. Well, me. I might.

[Dan Casey]

Yeah, right. Pekara.

[Jason Nguyen]

Pekara.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No.

[Jason Nguyen]

It could be dangerous. Pekara.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm not throwing my hand in the ring.

[Jason Nguyen]

No, no, I'll do it. I'll do it. I'll do it. I'll do it instead of you, Pekora.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Plixie goes. Well, both of you can. I was gonna throw my hat in the ring. And now that Pekora's here, I might be her bannerman. I believe in you, Pekora, way more than I believe in myself.

[Danielle Radford]

What's a bannerman?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, everyone who competes needs to have a bannerman. And a yellah holler.

[Danielle Radford]

A yellow hollow. Hollow.

[Jason Nguyen]

Someone who yells in hollers have to be goblins.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, I've got Fug here. Fug was gonna be my Panaman.

[Jason Nguyen]

Hi, Fug.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Hello, Spawn.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, don't call me that. Don't call me Spawn. Don't call me Spawn.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, yes, he's my Spawn.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Hello, Spawn.

[Jason Nguyen]

All right, enough of that. Somebody get Fug out of here.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Plexi goes Eight. All right, Fug. Go back to our camp.

[Jason Nguyen]

Plexie, if you're here, does that mean.

[Dan Casey]

The ship's here and the captain.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Me ship's here. But Chab and Dupa, they got tired of waiting for you. You've gone for a long time.

[Jason Nguyen]

Where's the ship?

[Dan Casey]

Real patient. One dad, me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Two weeks.

[Dan Casey]

Chab.

[Jason Nguyen]

I mean, it is archae. So, you know, they went back to Wretched Cove.

[Amy Vorpahl]

They haven't done anything with the ship. They don't know where you're gonna pop out.

[Danielle Radford]

I mean, it doesn't feel very temporary, Captain. Y. I just. You know, maybe if there was like a better temporary captain. But anyway, whatever. It's fine.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I left this ship for two weeks.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, we didn't know that timey weird stuff was gonna happen when we went through the portal.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, neither did they.

[Jason Nguyen]

I died.

[Amy Vorpahl]

What?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Dan Casey]

Bet you feel pretty bad now.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, I bet you feel awful.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Why would I feel awful?

[Jason Nguyen]

I don't know.

[Danielle Radford]

You're yelling at a dead man.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You were alive now. And your ear. Gone. Wow. Looks so good.

[Jason Nguyen]

Don't look at it. Don't look at it. I like, try to face my good ear towards.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, you know, goblins. They're nuts over you.

[Danielle Radford]

You do look pretty badass.

[Dan Casey]

Yeah, it looks pretty cool.

[Danielle Radford]

It looks really cool.

[Jason Nguyen]

Maybe if we join the Goblin Games, maybe Unzuk will notice us.

[Danielle Radford]

I agree. So, who wants to banner and who wants to holla?

[Dan Casey]

A yella holla.

[Danielle Radford]

Yella holla.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeller holler and a bannerman. And Plixie goes. Well, Pekara, if you're reen, I'm your bannerman. And it looks like Fug. Well, I'll also be your yellow Holler. Fug is gonna be around for just.

[Dan Casey]

No, you gotta take the circle guy.

[Danielle Radford]

You gotta take Bug.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I don't care.

[Dan Casey]

You made it pretty clear you don't want us. I'm pick the circle guy.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Foggy's gonna be the Bannerman, I'll be the Yellow Hollow, but I'll do the heavy lifting. And Plixie goes. Well, if we're competing against each other, may the best goblin win.

[Jason Nguyen]

May the best goblin win.

[Amy Vorpahl]

She gives you a wink and just says, I might not have wanted to even do this. Here we are. And it's not like I'm doing anything else. Not like I've got any dates planned or anything. So what do I have to lose?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, I don't have any dates planned either.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Just a way to spend the time, then. Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

Just a way to spend the time.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Glad I Got me gun back.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm glad you got your gun back, too.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And Flixie goes. Okay, you're coming on really strong. What happened out there? See ya. And they're off with each other.

[Dan Casey]

I think that went really well.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, you were so smooth.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, thank you.

[Danielle Radford]

Really.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm trying to figure out, you know, what's a good mix of heroic and terror. You know, it's hard to tell.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, it could be a really, really hard.

[Dan Casey]

You know what? Winning always goes well. Any ambitions?

[Jason Nguyen]

There's no telling what's in these Goblin Games. Did you guys decide what you wanted to be? Bannerman or Yellerhauler?

[Danielle Radford]

I don't know what any of those are.

[Dan Casey]

I have no real sense.

[Danielle Radford]

Go side up. And I guess they'll tell us what that means.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, you do approach. It does seem a little less dangerous now that you know what's going on. Different crews of goblins moving about. I would say most of them do just look like they're here for the food and the drink. There seems to be a station where there are goblins holding sticks with little painted animal leather on them. And that's more towards your left. There is an older female goblin corralling this group of people. She looks at you two and you and says, well, all right. So good to have another contestant. It looks someone wants to sign up here.

[Jason Nguyen]

How are you? Fare thee well, Miss Goblin.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm Bizzy. Oh, call me Bag Mizzle.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, Bag Mizzle.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, Baggie Maggie.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So good to see a little baby goblin signing up.

[Jason Nguyen]

Not a baby. Not a baby.

[Dan Casey]

Is Bag Missle your first name or last name?

[Amy Vorpahl]

It's my first name. Okay.

[Dan Casey]

No further questions.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, well, do you want to know my last name?

[Dan Casey]

Not unless you feel like sharing.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, I really want to tell you.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, I mean, I would love it.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Funny Crust.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Danielle Radford]

Baggy. Fummy Crust.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Baggy.

[Jason Nguyen]

Fummy Crust. Well, Baggy, you'd like to sign up for the Goblin Games.

[Amy Vorpahl]

All right, well, that can easily happen. And what is your name?

[Jason Nguyen]

My name's Tippy.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Tippy. Oh, interesting.

[Dan Casey]

What, is he already signed up or something?

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, he's not already signed up, but that would be.

[Dan Casey]

That'd be crazy.

[Jason Nguyen]

That would be insane if.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No. A juck and a tog. Bustflog.

[Jason Nguyen]

What's that?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Bustflog.

[Jason Nguyen]

Bus flog. Racking my brain.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You?

[Jason Nguyen]

Do I know them?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Bustflog is your last name.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm Tippy Busflog. I don't really like to use my last name too much. Cause, you know, I'm not really associated with my family anymore. But yes, I am Tippy Busflog.

[Danielle Radford]

You know what? We don't have to use your. Your goblin name. Like, we could just keep calling you Tippi. I think the people with just one name, I think that sounds cool.

[Amy Vorpahl]

But Juc and Tog are your. As you know, your adoptive siblings.

[Jason Nguyen]

What was my relationship to Chuck and Tog?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, you were. When I say adoptive, you were the adopted one. So.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes, of course.

[Amy Vorpahl]

These siblings. The brother, the sister, Juc, the brother, Tog, the female. And yeah, not great. Just not great. That entire family. Not great. Mom and dad, not very great.

[Jason Nguyen]

Duck and Todd hated me. Cause I was adopted and would. Well, you know how we do terror. They do it to babies. Yeah, I was actually a baby then.

[Dan Casey]

They were bus flogged baby bullies.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes, they were bus vlogged baby bullies and I hate them.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I can't help but overhear what's going on.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, sorry, we forgot to have a sidebar.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, sorry.

[Danielle Radford]

That's our bath. That's our bath.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No one's really. Look, a common story among goblins. Now, I try to do things differently with my family. We've got a lot of love in our family and so if y'all need a place to camp for the night, all of my kids and all of their spouses, no one's signing up. So we're looking for a hero for our family to champion.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tippy breaks out in a cold sweat and starts to act a little shaky. And he looks up at her and he goes, is my. My father here? The bus flogged Chief.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Did you mean Lump?

[Jason Nguyen]

Is Lump here?

[Amy Vorpahl]

You know, he very easily could be. I mean, you've got two of these Buzzflog kids signed up, but you're at Captain Lump.

[Jason Nguyen]

Captain Lump Captain.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Not of all Goblins, but yes. Of your tribe. Sure.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, let's just sign up really quick again. Get out of here.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, with that said, who's the Bannerman and who's the Yeller Hauler?

[Dan Casey]

Can you clarify the difference between these roles?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, we'll start with the Yeller Hauler. The Yeller Hauler is going to be in charge of announcing and being present when your competitor's competing and shouting at them, giving them clues, providing a means of support.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, I'll take that one. You should do that.

[Amy Vorpahl]

They're also in charge of announcing and providing information about what's going on to the the general runners of the Goblin Games and making sure that the judge has all the information as well. Oh, and you'll be in charge of announcing your competitor tomorrow at the Games.

[Danielle Radford]

Fantastic. I will take that one.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Dan Casey]

Absolutely busy written all over it. Now, Ms. Fummycrust, what does a bannerman do?

[Amy Vorpahl]

A bannerman's in charge of getting a lot of support from the crowd. So this is going to be recruiting people like myself and my family, who we haven't chosen one yet, to get the other Goblins on board for supporting one specific champion to, you know, sponsor or run about and do certain things for throughout the Games. Now, that's all under wraps, you know, right? Above wraps, we're just going, yay. Yay. But under wraps, there's. There's certain ways that we might be able to influence the Games.

[Dan Casey]

Ah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And we Goblins, you know, we love a good subterfuge. And I will say most of the judges and most of the runners are willing to look the other way sometimes.

[Dan Casey]

Interesting.

[Amy Vorpahl]

To give a leg up to some of our champions.

[Danielle Radford]

All right.

[Dan Casey]

I think I'm picking up what you're putting down.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And the more supporters you have, the better odds you have at having favor in the Games.

[Jason Nguyen]

You're like my hype man.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, and you'll need to develop a bit of a sigil for this crew, too, for your champions.

[Danielle Radford]

Sigil.

[Dan Casey]

Sigil, Sigil.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. There's a station over there where you can craft it.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, thank you.

[Dan Casey]

Thank you.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, for an actual banner. And then you're in charge of winning.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'll try.

[Danielle Radford]

You've got that part down.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

There are the first three challenges tomorrow. And then there's a secret one that I don't even know. But the first one is called Go Night Night.

[Jason Nguyen]

Go Night Night. Oh, I love going night night.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Go Night Night is a game of timing where you will be outside of a circle with a group of other Goblins, and the music will be playing. And when the playing stops, you need to find yourself inside the circle as soon as possible. Anyone outside of the circle is going to get shot at with sleep darts, and they're gonna go night night.

[Jason Nguyen]

Got it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Once you're shot with a sleep dart and you go night night, you're considered out of the competition. So we will stop that game as soon as we have only 12 contestants left.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Second challenge is the umbaba dance.

[Jason Nguyen]

Umbaba dance.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And, you know, that one's a very charismatic, very energetic dance. And it can be open to interpretation. We've had many Goblins really make it their own, but there are certain things that an umbaba dance does require. Must be Chaotic and flailing.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, I could do that.

[Amy Vorpahl]

The second one is. It must be unpredictable. Almost at all times.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You've got to not see where it's going.

[Jason Nguyen]

That's okay, because that's how I dance. I don't know what I'm doing.

[Amy Vorpahl]

The third one is the amount of energy produced doing this dance must look disproportionate to the size of the creature. So if you've got a lot of energy going on in there, you might be at an advantage because you do look like a baby.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm so full of energy, you wouldn't even know.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, those are the three requirements, so we'll see. And then the third one, it's actually called frog busting.

[Jason Nguyen]

Frog busting.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And as a buzzflog, maybe you'd be good at frog busting. The frog busting is a chance for everyone, the remaining contestants, to go out and catch and then ride back on a froghemoth.

[Jason Nguyen]

Frog. Hemoth.

[Danielle Radford]

Froghemoth.

[Dan Casey]

Froghemoth.

[Jason Nguyen]

Froghemoth. Of course. How big?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Froghemoth size.

[Jason Nguyen]

So, yeah, of course I know what size that is. Do you know what size that is?

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, it sounds like maybe you don't know what size.

[Jason Nguyen]

You don't know what size that is, do you?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, it's. I mean, it's a big old creature.

[Jason Nguyen]

All right, I'll just sit. And then there's a secret one, secret.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Challenge that I don't even know about. But maybe there's something.

[Jason Nguyen]

Is there a way to find out?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, is there a way to find out?

[Dan Casey]

Look, have you met my friend Mr. Unzoog? And I push a dungeon dollar across the table.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I will cheat during the games. I'll help out. Cheating. But I will not be bribed. I have certain standards.

[Dan Casey]

Okay, I was just testing your morals, Mrs. Friedman. Can I take the dungeon dollar back?

[Jason Nguyen]

Is there any shooting in any of these games? Any blasting with guns?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Maybe in the secret one? I mean, you could use a gun or a shooter at any point. I mean, you know, you could shoot the froghemoth. I don't know how much good that'll do. I mean, it's a huge thing.

[Dan Casey]

Sounds like the only rule is win.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, it is. Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

And last question. This is Fummycrest. Is Lump competing?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Lump is not competing. He thinks himself above this. All the Goblin captains do feel like they already become Goblin heroes. They don't need this title.

[Jason Nguyen]

What about Jak and Tog?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Juk and Tog are both competing against each other, which I've heard is not uncommon for Goblin siblings.

[Jason Nguyen]

We Will crush them. We will inspire terror into Juc and Thug.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, I love this. So the reason my family hasn't chosen a champion yet is because I don't like the vibe of some of these really selfish people. It's just not the kind of goblins I want to raise and have my kids look up to them. But I like that speech right there. If there's any more of that, you can come by my camp and try to recruit us.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, we'll come by your camp. We'll come by your camp.

[Amy Vorpahl]

All right. Do you have a place to camp for the night?

[Jason Nguyen]

We do not yet, but is there a good place for us to do that?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Look, I just think y'all are real nice, so if we do decide to be your champions, you could camp out with us. Other than that, there's. Find a spot on the ground every. Every other comfortable place.

[Dan Casey]

I also want to preface. We do have a gross man with us.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, my God. I forgot about Crandall.

[Dan Casey]

I know, but presumably he's here because I did not hear him walk off.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, I'm here. I will not be participating in any level of this. The unzu that you do not know, he is my first priority. She says, okay, so you're just going to watch the.

[Jason Nguyen]

He's an audience member. That's what he's going to do.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Spectator. You, sir, are not allowed at our camp. I think that's fine.

[Danielle Radford]

Good call.

[Amy Vorpahl]

God, my children will think you are terrifying. And we, the little ones especially, need to sleep tonight.

[Jason Nguyen]

Crandall, looks like you're going to have to pitch a tent somewhere far from us.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. Yes. First order of business. Looks like there are piles of weapons and piles of armor. Is there anything. Just clothes in general I might get my hands on? And she goes, yeah, absolutely. And I might walk you there myself, because it seems like our missions to cover you up are very aligned right now.

[Dan Casey]

He's positively spilling out of his swimsuit right now.

[Jason Nguyen]

Are there any guns?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Guns? I'm not sure about that. But there's different weapons. It's all in a pile. It's really messy, but every champion gets their pick of it. The one thing that I will tell you is there's a big party tonight, a big feast, and there's gonna be some dancing. And the one thing that you might really want to do is gain favor with Glomgin Guamgen. Do you want to know his last name?

[Jason Nguyen]

Of course I do.

[Danielle Radford]

Absolutely.

[Jason Nguyen]

Go ahead. Go ahead. Say it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Moss. Pronk.

[Jason Nguyen]

Moss Globgen.

[Dan Casey]

Mosspronk.

[Jason Nguyen]

These are Such beautiful names.

[Amy Vorpahl]

They really are. We're a diverse people. So he's the elder Goblin judge of the entire games.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, Judge Moss Prog.

[Jason Nguyen]

Moss Moss Prague Moss Prog. Well, it seems like we want to camp, we want to find some weapons, and we want to gain some favor.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And build a banner.

[Jason Nguyen]

And build a banner.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. And me and my kids are camped out over there. You can go and find them or me at the funicrust estate at the Fummy Crust lot. That's right. Thanks for remembering my last name.

[Dan Casey]

Of course. I would never forget it. Bagmezle.

[Jason Nguyen]

And Mrs. Fummycrust. Can I make one final request?

[Amy Vorpahl]

You've had so many final things.

[Danielle Radford]

I know.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, you may. What is it?

[Jason Nguyen]

Instead of being. Instead of being signed up as Tippi Bus Flog, I like to be signed up as Tippi Terror Squad. That being my new. A new year means new opportunities. And if you've been thinking about starting your own business, let this be your sign to take the leap. Of course, this decision comes with a lot of questions like how do I get started? How do I come up with a brand? How do I sell stuff to people? What am I even going to sell? Well, if you have all those questions, you can take a deep breath because Shopify's got you. Shopify makes it simple to create your brand, open for business and get your first sale. With Shopify, you can get your store up and running easily with thousands of customizable templates. No coding or design skills required. All you need to do is drag and drop. Their powerful social media tools let you connect all your channels and create shoppable posts to help you sell everywhere people scroll. And Shopify makes it easy to manage all the details like shipping, taxes and payments from one single dashboard, allowing you to focus on the important stuff, like growing your business. The best time to start your business is right now. And with Shopify, your first sale is closer than you think. Established in 2025. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com realm all lowercase go to shopify.com realm to start selling with Shopify today. Shopify.com realm these are violent criminals, so they're not going to go down easy.

[Dan Casey]

ABC Tuesdays. Let's get the rookie is back.

[Danielle Radford]

We have two new rookies starting today.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Howdy.

[Danielle Radford]

Being a cop is stressful. 24.

[Amy Vorpahl]

7. Every year on the job is different.

[Dan Casey]

And training day.

[Amy Vorpahl]

We have a serial killer at large. Never ends.

[Jason Nguyen]

We need an ambulance.

[Dan Casey]

The rookie all new Tuesdays on ABC.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And stream on Hulu.

[Jason Nguyen]

Last name?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, I don't see a real problem with that. Terror Squad. It doesn't really sound like a goblin's.

[Jason Nguyen]

Last name, but I can't think of a last name right now. I just think of Terror. Terror Squad. We're the Terror Squad. And I feel like we're one.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Tippy Terror Squad.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, weird, dysfunctional family, so why not? I'm Tippy Terror Squad from now on. Tippy Bus Flog. Terror Squad.

[Danielle Radford]

Tippy Bus Flog. Terror Squad.

[Jason Nguyen]

Terror Squad. Yes.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, I kind of like the ring of that. No problem at all. You're signed up.

[Jason Nguyen]

All right. We're signed up.

[Amy Vorpahl]

As you peer around, it does seem like you are kind of swamped with duties to do to get ready for the games tomorrow. What would you.

[Jason Nguyen]

Seems like you need a banner.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, yeah. I'm gonna go work on the Bandit. Do you have any requests?

[Jason Nguyen]

What if it's Luff but with a gun?

[Dan Casey]

Should it be one gun or eight guns?

[Jason Nguyen]

Eight guns. Oh, it's a spider with eight guns.

[Dan Casey]

Fantastic Spider with eight guns.

[Jason Nguyen]

And it should say Terror on it. Terror Spider with eight guns.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, all right. That's lovely.

[Dan Casey]

I'm gonna get to work on that.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, and a clipboard for busy. Well, one of the.

[Amy Vorpahl]

One.

[Jason Nguyen]

Maybe one of the hands has a clipboard.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, it's a clipboard and seven guns.

[Jason Nguyen]

Seven guns. Okay, perfect.

[Danielle Radford]

It's a good ratio, clipboard to gun. Yes.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm honored to be listed under the word terror, as if the very definition of terror is me with a clipboard and seven guns.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, that's what, you know, you dream big, so we can, too.

[Amy Vorpahl]

If I'm holding seven guns, it's almost as though I don't even need to stand.

[Jason Nguyen]

Nope, nope, nope.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I need zero limbs to stand. So my body, my carapace is on the ground. And all seven arms are held in the air.

[Jason Nguyen]

Are you drawing? You're drawing this Fibs.

[Dan Casey]

I'm doing my best.

[Jason Nguyen]

She's just. Please draw. Keep going. Keep going, Liz.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So I just. I'm making almost like a bowl, like, shape. And then the only real thing you see of me if you're looking at me from the front, is my eyes. All of them just staring at me.

[Jason Nguyen]

You're a bowling ball with eyes and.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Guns and a clipboard underneath the word terror.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes.

[Amy Vorpahl]

If there was a dictionary, this is what you would see.

[Jason Nguyen]

Exactly.

[Amy Vorpahl]

If you want to take your long rest now, you'll miss out on the party.

[Dan Casey]

No, we gotta stay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You could take A short rest while at the crafting station for the banner.

[Danielle Radford]

And you know what? While we're doing that, Busy just really loves singing. So she's gonna start just, like, performing. She takes out her drums and she starts, like, singing. And I am busy rapping. Cast. Damn it. Song of rest.

[Jason Nguyen]

Busy's. Yes. Oh.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Song of rest.

[Dan Casey]

Rap of nap.

[Jason Nguyen]

And for us to be rested, Bizzy has to do a rap.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes. What does the rap sound like?

[Danielle Radford]

It's game day. We're having a blast. We're gonna go kick some goblin ass. F off all of you. Buster. Cause now we go and go grab all of them frogs. We go and ride them right on top the tippy tippy top with our man Tip Top. He's hanging. He ain't got no last name in. He's going for the terror Squad begging. And we slaggin all these goblins and.

[Amy Vorpahl]

We'Re gonna get out of here.

[Danielle Radford]

That's the end of my song.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm so rested.

[Dan Casey]

I'm too hyped to sleep. Which is a good thing, because we don't sleep. We just rest.

[Danielle Radford]

We don't sleep. We don't sleep. We're too busy being tight.

[Jason Nguyen]

Those rhymes were so sick. Disgusting. Thank you.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Ew.

[Danielle Radford]

So each of you regains an extra 1d6 hit points.

[Jason Nguyen]

1D6. Hit points.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Six.

[Dan Casey]

Let's go.

[Jason Nguyen]

Perfect. I am back up to four.

[Dan Casey]

I'm at seven.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Are you feeling more rested now?

[Dan Casey]

I think I put the finishing touches on this banner.

[Jason Nguyen]

Let's see it. Let's see it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes. What does it look like?

[Dan Casey]

It's definitely a biologically accurate phase fighter. A rendition of my niece Luff, wielding not one, not two, but seven guns and one clipboard that represents the terror she will wreak upon this land. And also the most important people in her life, her Uncle Tippy and her aunt Busy.

[Danielle Radford]

It's beautiful.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm flying that asap.

[Dan Casey]

Good, because I used up all of our materials to make this, and I would hate to have to. To do a second try.

[Jason Nguyen]

No notes. That is beautiful.

[Danielle Radford]

We need to make sure that you need to get a weapon.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Danielle Radford]

And we've got to go. You've got to also go back, and you have got to talk to Bag's family so that we make sure we have a place to sleep tonight. I do not want to be sleeping near Crandall.

[Jason Nguyen]

I think the key is going to be lots of confidence.

[Danielle Radford]

Lots of confidence.

[Jason Nguyen]

Love, Braggadocious.

[Danielle Radford]

Perfect. And we can talk to them at the big party tonight, right?

[Jason Nguyen]

100%. The only thing is, I need to have some sort of weapon to feel confident about. Let's go look in the weapon pile and see if there's anything I can use.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, we can go look for weapons also. I mean, I've seen you do some really cool stuff. Whether or not you have a weapon, I'm not sure if you've noticed that.

[Jason Nguyen]

I just feel like a gun in my hand gives me so much power.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, I could see that. Let's see what they have. And if they don't have a gun, that's okay.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, let's just look in the weapon pile to see if it is.

[Dan Casey]

Sure, yeah.

[Danielle Radford]

Let's see what's in the weapon pile.

[Amy Vorpahl]

It is really scrabbly looking weapons. This armory is. I mean, it's like it's picked through. Yeah, it is picked through. Go ahead and roll an investigation. Check.

[Dan Casey]

I'm gonna help Tippi with this.

[Jason Nguyen]

Check.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, awesome.

[Jason Nguyen]

So you get a nat20 with the advantage. 47 advantage at the bottom of the pile. That is.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Wow.

[Jason Nguyen]

That was incredible.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, what would you like? What are you specifically looking for?

[Jason Nguyen]

A gun.

[Amy Vorpahl]

A gun? Yeah, absolutely. A gun. Okay. Okay. So, yeah, I mean, I think with a 20, you're able to find a gun that can do that. I will say, what was the damage before that I gave you?

[Jason Nguyen]

It's 1D10.

[Amy Vorpahl]

1D10. It's gonna be 1D8.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

So could you describe what the gun looks like?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, sure. So it is made of metal, but I think what makes it less fun than the other gun is the barrel itself is actually made of wood, and it's been used, so it's kind of cracked at the tip of it, which makes it a little more unreliable. It does also seem to be wonky. It's smaller than the Pekara gun, less sturdy, less weight to it. It almost seems like the goblin who made it has a good understanding working of how. How a crossbow works and then mash some things together so it's less elegant.

[Dan Casey]

This is more blunder and less busted than I was expecting.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tippy looks at this decrepit old gun with its wooden shaft and sort of cracks and rust on it, and it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. He holds it, sort of caresses it, and he goes, I'm so back. And he spins it around and puts it back in his little weird leather bracer holster. And he goes, let's go kick some goblin ass.

[Danielle Radford]

But first we have to charm some goblins.

[Dan Casey]

Let's go charm some ass.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. Thank you. For saying that. Because I was going to go in there and just start blasting.

[Danielle Radford]

You can't blast.

[Dan Casey]

Okay.

[Danielle Radford]

No goblasting.

[Jason Nguyen]

All right, well, let's go charm some goblins, and then let's go blast some goblin ass.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So you are able to pretty much see Baggie's family camp, the Fummy Crust camp. And it is.

[Jason Nguyen]

Me up right now. It is.

[Danielle Radford]

It is.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, there's so many. And so you're able to see plenty of fummy crusts hanging around. And they range in ages, but for the most part, they do seem to be a young adult.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tippy is walking in, thumbs in his pants, hands out, thumbs in his pants, with a large gait, like he's a cowboy.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, okay.

[Jason Nguyen]

Walking around, sort of just nodding at people. What's up? What's going on?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, a performance check. Let's see what the vibe is. Let's see if they're catching anyone's attention.

[Jason Nguyen]

Let's see what's happening. That's gonna be a six.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Are you all helping him? What are you doing? Behold.

[Danielle Radford]

It is Tippy of the Terror Squad.

[Jason Nguyen]

Terror Squad.

[Danielle Radford]

Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Amazing performance check for you.

[Jason Nguyen]

Please, please.

[Danielle Radford]

It's Tippy.

[Amy Vorpahl]

It's Tippy.

[Jason Nguyen]

It's Tippy.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, that is a nat 20.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Danielle Radford]

So that's a 23.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That's a. That's incredible.

[Jason Nguyen]

I needed that.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That is gonna give you the help. Action. So you can roll that six again.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. All right. Okay, that's not bad. That is 17.

[Amy Vorpahl]

17. And what are you doing, Fibs?

[Dan Casey]

I'm waving the banner like my life depends on it. Back and forth, saying, here, ye fubby crusts. Backing Tippy is a.

[Jason Nguyen]

What? He said is a what? What'd you say, Bibbs?

[Dan Casey]

I don't know. It sounded natural based on the nomenclature.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, I'll say it, too.

[Dan Casey]

Hey, ye Fummy crust. Backing Tippy is a Cummy Musk.

[Jason Nguyen]

You hear that? Fummy crust. If you want to back the right guy, you found him. Because I'm a cummy musk.

[Danielle Radford]

Co co me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. Okay. Good job, everybody. Good job.

[Jason Nguyen]

More performance acts.

[Amy Vorpahl]

None of the goblins have last names anymore.

[Jason Nguyen]

Wow.

[Dan Casey]

They've changed to a mononymic culture.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

What was I thinking? Yeah, that's not how goblin lore works. They just have first names now. So you're heading over to them. There's about 25 of them, and they all kind of look up, and you can see some people frowning at the skeletons very easily. But then they actually get a glimpse of Tippy, and they're like, they're like, oh, w. Look at that. Look at that. Goblin with one One ear.

[Jason Nguyen]

You kidding? Behold.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And a gun who knows how to fire.

[Danielle Radford]

How did you do it?

[Amy Vorpahl]

How?

[Dan Casey]

All the better to endear you with.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And then you hear other whispers of, like, well, they. He made friends of skeletons. He's got the skeletons working for you. Got skeleton servants.

[Jason Nguyen]

What is that?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, wow.

[Danielle Radford]

That is a. Oh.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, you there. They're not skeleton servants. They're my skeleton friends.

[Amy Vorpahl]

What? What? What? No. How even does that have. Oh, my God.

[Jason Nguyen]

That's right, you fummy crust. I'm here to be champion of the Goblin Games. And I have my skeleton friends to thank. If you want to back the right champion, you're gonna back old Chippy boy. And I, like, show off the gun.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, the old hand blaster.

[Dan Casey]

He's got a gun.

[Jason Nguyen]

He's got a gun.

[Danielle Radford]

I have a busy gun. Y'all ready for tips?

[Dan Casey]

Legally distinct.

[Danielle Radford]

Y'all ready for tips?

[Jason Nguyen]

And at the end of Busy Song, I just start blasting into the air, going like this.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, yeah. And everyone. Everyone starts applauding. These funding crests are just going nuts. And you can see one goblin hardened old for his age. I guess. He looks young but withered and like, he's been through a lot. He comes up and goes, what about you makes you think you could be a goblin hero?

[Jason Nguyen]

Listen to me, Pops. I've seen hell, I've died, and I've returned from the great beyond. How many goblins could say that? Look at his ear. It's not there.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. Tell us the tale of how you lost your ear.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tell him, busy.

[Danielle Radford]

The tale of the great goblin Tippy, conqueror of death. Tippy the Goblet decided that he would sacrifice himself upon the altar of true love. Of true love.

[Jason Nguyen]

Of true love.

[Danielle Radford]

Of true love. And took on the sack of Aurelia.

[Jason Nguyen]

I spin my gun on my finger.

[Dan Casey]

Fibs is swinging the banner like a scythe.

[Danielle Radford]

Tippy challenged the scythe to their faces and was able to rescue the fairest goblin lady in all of the lands.

[Dan Casey]

You're doing great.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Thank you.

[Danielle Radford]

Tippy was then, for his efforts, struck down. Sorry, hold on. Struck down. He traveled to planes beyond this one starry plain, where he met and was confronted with death, which he conquered using flame and lightning. And busy cast. Busy cast silent image so it looks like flames and lightning.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, my gosh.

[Danielle Radford]

And then he was able to look deep within himself and find the strength to come back with his true lady love.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay, And I don't need to know that part And a gun. And a gun. Yes, I need a gun.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That is.

[Danielle Radford]

We appeared upon your shores only slightly worse for wear.

[Jason Nguyen]

Having sacrificed his ear in the great beyond.

[Danielle Radford]

And now we are here to be your champion.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tippy, it's me. Oh, got the gun a little bit. Yeah. It's me, Tippy.

[Danielle Radford]

Terror Squad.

[Jason Nguyen]

Terror Squad. Terror Squad.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I mean that is a wildly impressive tale. I've told a few tales myself, so I know when there's some exaggeration. But for the most part that.

[Jason Nguyen]

No, that was all happened to me. That said, honestly.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That sound familiar though?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, she was just using a big old voice, but yeah, that all happened. Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh my. Well, here. Here's a question. You said the greatest, hottest Goblin girl.

[Dan Casey]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

Most beautiful Goblin girl I've ever seen. Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And she said you came out. You came out with her. Is she supporting you too?

[Jason Nguyen]

She's in the Goblin Games herself. We will be rivals.

[Amy Vorpahl]

What?

[Jason Nguyen]

She signed up. She said she wanted to do it. Now who am I to stop her?

[Danielle Radford]

Tippy believes that he is not controlling. Tippi believes every goblin can control their own fate.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You gotta. It sounds like you're in trouble.

[Jason Nguyen]

Not as much trouble as these other half witted goblins are.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I know what it's like to try to tell someone to do what you want them to do.

[Dan Casey]

Talking about bag mizzle, right?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, baggy old baggy.

[Dan Casey]

And what is your name?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Gwent. Gwent.

[Danielle Radford]

What's your last name? Gwent?

[Jason Nguyen]

Flummycrust.

[Danielle Radford]

Flemmycrust.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm a full.

[Jason Nguyen]

For some reason. That sounds very distinctive and noble.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, thank you.

[Jason Nguyen]

Flemmycrust, do you stand with me?

[Danielle Radford]

I do.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I think we do. And the reason isn't the reason that you think all this death and glory and ears ripped off or whatever. That's impressive. And I think in most goblin cultures would really find that important. But I like a good love story.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, well, I like a good gun story. And let's go tell that story using bullets.

[Dan Casey]

Also, can we sleep here tonight?

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, we're like kind of tuckered.

[Jason Nguyen]

We really need a place to nap.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, yes. Is your lady love going to be sleeping here too?

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, if she wants to. And chill on calling her my lady love.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That's what she said in the story. You said there was zero exaggeration.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes. Right. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She can sleep here.

[Dan Casey]

That's nonfiction.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, she could sleep here. Well, Mr. Fummy Crust. Gwent, Can I call you Gwent?

[Amy Vorpahl]

You may call me Gwent. All right.

[Jason Nguyen]

Gwent.

[Dan Casey]

Can I call you Mr. Fummycrust.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You may call me Mr. Fummy Crust. Is there a special title you'd like to.

[Danielle Radford]

If I could call you Mr. Crust. Crust.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, okay.

[Danielle Radford]

If you like it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, sure. Skeletons are weird. Look. Skeletons are weird. I'm happy with that. Awesome.

[Danielle Radford]

Thank you, Crusty.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So, yeah, later tonight a lot of these kids might be crawling all over you. Seeing who the hero is when we.

[Jason Nguyen]

Go to the party. Anything you could tell us about the other competitors or how to win some favor?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, Glongan. Moss. Pronk is.

[Dan Casey]

Yeah. Judge Moss Pronc.

[Jason Nguyen]

Judge Moss Pronc.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He's a difficult goblin to tell what is going to actually impress him or not. We've had years that someone just laid a big old elk fur on him and he liked it. So we made them the champion. Then we had another one that. Oh, a strong goblin, almost a hobgoblin. Lifted up Glomgan with one arm into the air and he said, well, if you can do that with one arm, he might desert be deserving of goblin hero. One guy just vomited in front of him. And it was a lot of vomit.

[Dan Casey]

I was going to say that's.

[Jason Nguyen]

I've done that.

[Dan Casey]

I don't think I've seen anyone vomit more than you.

[Amy Vorpahl]

It looked as though that tiny container of the goblin could not contain that amount of vomit. And he got the favor. But you see how it varies year to year. It's not like anyone hasn't tried to vomit again in front of him or put an elf carcass on his shoulders. I think it's whatever way the wind blows that this guy's gonna choose his favorite champion.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. Something new. Something strange. Yeah. I have an idea.

[Dan Casey]

You gonna shoot him? Huh?

[Amy Vorpahl]

What? There's also one thing. There's also one thing I should tell you that Baggy would not have told you is that there's a guy running around taking bets.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, oh, oh.

[Dan Casey]

Who's this guy?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. Oh, he's my brother. Well, I'm Gwent.

[Jason Nguyen]

Gwent. What's his name?

[Amy Vorpahl]

He's went.

[Jason Nguyen]

He's another Fummy Crust.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He is not a foamy crust.

[Dan Casey]

What is his last name and first name?

[Jason Nguyen]

We'd like to know.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You know. Cause we're a matriarchal society.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, right.

[Jason Nguyen]

Of course.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So he married and got a different last name. His last name is Kudgegloom.

[Danielle Radford]

Kudgegloom.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Look out for him. So he's taking bets. He also, if you're interested in which most goblins are. And any of the other kinds of more untoward advantages he Might have you covered.

[Dan Casey]

We gotta find this.

[Jason Nguyen]

We gotta find some. The wet cudgloom.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And he points out a spot where he'll say, I'll set up some mats for you to lay down in the evening. My kids might want a bedtime story from their champion. But other than that, no problem. You have a place here in our camp, and we'll give you our support.

[Jason Nguyen]

Thanks, partner. I spit my hand, and I put my hand out.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. And he, like, you know, hocks a loogie and his hands covered in stuff.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, I didn't think you were gonna do that too.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He does it as well. Well, I want your spit. I didn't even get your spit.

[Jason Nguyen]

Just to. We're okay. We're okay.

[Dan Casey]

He's gotta save his moisture for tomorrow.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, smart goblin over here. Okay, great. So you're ready for the party?

[Jason Nguyen]

We're ready for the party.

[Danielle Radford]

All right.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, let's go to the party.

[Amy Vorpahl]

This is in the same area that everything else is just a little bit off site. You can see goblins building stadium seating just out of wood and sticks and moss. And just beyond the stadium seating, on the other side is an open area where there is a stage and some goblins playing some tunes. Then there are just people walking around with food. There's a big table that has even more food laid on it. Just a huge feast. And most of the goblins that you've seen before are just crammed in there. Really. A lot of screaming, a lot of standing on each other's shoulders and jumping off. There's also beyond that, some hot springs where goblins are kind of having a spa day. Crandall is actually taking part in the hot springs.

[Danielle Radford]

Of course he is.

[Amy Vorpahl]

There is an announcer who every once in a while will start up a dance that everyone joins in. But nothing like that is going on right now.

[Jason Nguyen]

Do we see other banners up?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, yes. You can see that there are plenty of sigils marching around with bannermen. Lots of bravado with these champions. Other competitors you would recognize. Juck and Tog. Different ones. One of them just has two circles as a stigil.

[Dan Casey]

Ah, it's Fug, really.

[Jason Nguyen]

That's Fug for sure.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, that's Plixie. So Jut did two circles and Tog did an X. Nothing as elaborate as your drawing of a spider. You hear Plixie. And Pakara's last name is. Plixie's doing her own version of Yeller hollering at the moment. And she's just shouting out about Pakara. Donknozzle. Excuse me?

[Jason Nguyen]

Donk. It was Donk Nozzle the whole time. Dock nozzle the whole time. Huh?

[Danielle Radford]

She got that donk.

[Jason Nguyen]

I guess she's got that donk nozzle on her.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I guess the fummy crust would. I'm sorry.

[Jason Nguyen]

Uh huh.

[Dan Casey]

Tippy, how you feeling, man?

[Jason Nguyen]

I just got it. I'm all right. Just stop. Nozzle, huh?

[Amy Vorpahl]

You'd have to take her name.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'd be Tippy Donk Nozzle. Tippy Donk Nozzle.

[Danielle Radford]

Yep.

[Jason Nguyen]

Couldn't have any other name for her, I guess. Donk Nozzle.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You've already changed your name once. Why not again? Is there anything particular that you're looking for at this party?

[Jason Nguyen]

What do you guys think?

[Dan Casey]

I would very much like to find went Cudge Gloom. Because I believe in you. And I would like to place a bet on you taking home the title.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. Yeah. All right.

[Dan Casey]

And also maybe he can put us onto whomst we should be talking to so we can hudge up some favor for you.

[Jason Nguyen]

Why don't we spread out, mingle about?

[Dan Casey]

That's what we do best. Splitting about.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, it's great. No, I'm going to go and see. I'm going to ask some more questions about the judge.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay.

[Danielle Radford]

And also maybe like be a little sneaky since I am a little roguesy, and see if I can like kind of scout out some of the other competitors.

[Dan Casey]

So you're on the judge, I'm on the cudge. What about you?

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm gonna go seek out Juck and Tog.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, you're not on that donk.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I what?

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm avoiding the Donk nozzle for now.

[Danielle Radford]

You're not on the dock?

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm not on that.

[Dan Casey]

All roads lead to Donk Nozzle.

[Jason Nguyen]

Don't worry, there'll be time for Doc Nozzle Lane.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Dan, based on the description that Gwent gave you, Gwent is off in a corner. He is being approached by many people and he looks like Gwent, but he's got this glimmer in his eye and just a perpetual smile. And he does have a clipboard. He's got a clipboard. He's got a little book that he keeps sliding in and out of his pocket. And he does look like he's laden with almost like a bandolier like you, like with goods on him. And as you approach, he catches your eye, handles some more business, does some whispering to some other goblins, sends them on their way, finishes up business with another guy, takes something from them, puts it in his Bandolier. And then it's your turn. And he goes. So, what can I do for you?

[Dan Casey]

Hail and well met. You wouldn't happen to be went cudgebloom, would you?

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, I'm Wendt. Cudge Bloom.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, I'm so sorry.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm wet.

[Jason Nguyen]

Cudge Bloom.

[Dan Casey]

I say Bloom, because you look like you're positively thriving in this environment. Both in business and in life.

[Amy Vorpahl]

A man with a fancy mouth on him. I like it. So you heard what I'm about, right?

[Dan Casey]

I sure have. I was speaking with your brother. The patriarch of the Fummy Crust family.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Gwen. Good, good, good man.

[Dan Casey]

As you may be able to tell from my banner, I represent a certain interest in these gobby games. I represent your once and future champion. His name is Tippy Terror Squad. And I would like to place a bet on him to take home this entire series of games.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. Well, that is something I can get sorted for you. What kind of ranger are you looking to make?

[Dan Casey]

I hand him all of the money I have. So. 100 gold.

[Amy Vorpahl]

100?

[Dan Casey]

It's in a little satchel. I don't know how much this is in dungeon dollars, but I think it's a lot.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. The way this works is if your guy wins, you get the pool. And if he doesn't win, you get nothing.

[Dan Casey]

Okay, I understand.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. And there's no second place or anything.

[Dan Casey]

That's fine.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That is so much money.

[Dan Casey]

I guess I really don't have a conception.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, tell me this, because that's a lot. It's a lot of money and obviously you're biased, but as a bookkeeper, I need to know these things. Are other people going to be betting for this guy?

[Dan Casey]

I don't know. I just got to town.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, what makes him so special that you would drop a hundred gold pieces?

[Dan Casey]

Oh, he's one of my best friends, okay?

[Amy Vorpahl]

That's what that. But what traits and qualities makes you think that he's going to be the goblin hero?

[Dan Casey]

He's brave, he's loyal, he's ingenious. He's got a gun, okay?

[Amy Vorpahl]

I mean, other goblins have guns and other.

[Dan Casey]

Not like this, they don't. Okay, well, otherwise their guns have legs.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Huh? Okay.

[Dan Casey]

By the way, don't tell anybody I said that, okay?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Cause exactly zero other people have bet on this. I think he's a new addition.

[Dan Casey]

I guess that other people must have even less of an understanding of the value of money than I do if they're not betting on old Tippy Terror Squad.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You have to understand, I mean, this is Money.

[Dan Casey]

He's got the fummy crust. Fummy trust.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Is there anything else about this tippy that I need to know?

[Dan Casey]

This is his first Goblin Games, if that helps. Okay, I should mention, he also orchestrated a kegger, becoming a rager. And he also blew up a building.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, that's very.

[Dan Casey]

He's been an airship captain, but no.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Real Goblin Games of any sort.

[Dan Casey]

No Goblin Games, but he's taking a lot of lives.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, damn.

[Dan Casey]

Also in fibs. Leans in real close. I've heard you know how to do crime, and I would like to do some crime to help my friend.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, I do understand what you're talking about. All of these crimes, they do cost money. And it seems as though you spent all your money on the wager.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, but there's gonna be more once I win.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Look, I've heard this before, but there are some things I can do for a price.

[Dan Casey]

Name one.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, I can tell you what the fourth challenge is gonna.

[Dan Casey]

What would the price for that be?

[Amy Vorpahl]

That would be 50 gold pieces. I can also give you some. Ooh, ooh, ooh.

[Dan Casey]

That's a cool song.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Dangerous, dangerous if found mushrooms.

[Jason Nguyen]

Hi, I'm Laura Cathcart Robbins, and I.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Am the host and creator of the podcast Only One in the Room. Every week, my co host, Scott Slaughter, and I invite you to join us in Lose Yourself in Someone's Only One Story. The Only One in the Room has a wide variety of guests, from prisoners to abuse survivors to swingers.

[Jason Nguyen]

With 21 seasons and counting, we guarantee.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That only one in the room will have a story that you'll connect with. This podcast is for anyone who has ever felt alone in a room full of people.

[Jason Nguyen]

Which is to say that this podcast is for everyone.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Hey, folks.

[Jason Nguyen]

We're the hosts of Comic Sans, the podcast about comics for those who are sans knowledge. I'm Jen. And I'm Nat. Comic Sans is a show for people who are new to comics like me, and people who love them like me. I make Nat read some of my favorite works in the medium, including Saga, Daredevil, and the Flintstones. And Yann talks about what makes that comic special. We've just launched season three of Comic Sans with new episodes every two weeks. And you can binge the first two seasons wherever you get your podcasts.

[Amy Vorpahl]

They do a various variety of boons for your competitor during the game.

[Dan Casey]

I don't know if Pippi's ever dabbled in psychotropic aids.

[Amy Vorpahl]

They're more physical than they are mental. But I know a few goblins who are using Them.

[Dan Casey]

Let's see. Do I have anything that I can offer? What if I showed you a talking spider?

[Amy Vorpahl]

If you showed it to me, yeah. Could I have a conversation with this spider? I suppose I'm intrigued. For that, I would give you the mushroom.

[Dan Casey]

Okay, Luff, would you please come out and have a conversation in which you do not kill this fine gentleman?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Hello. I am Luff. I am your worst nightmare. Can he understand that?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes. I realize she speaks spider.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He can understand her. Yes.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, good. Good question. And she says, I am made of the stuff of nightmares, and I will crawl into your head and eat your brains from your nose hole. What?

[Dan Casey]

And she has a tiny gun, and.

[Amy Vorpahl]

She shoots her gun out and a web comes out, and he goes.

[Dan Casey]

Pretty cool, huh?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, I got one question for you. What do you. What's the best part of riding around inside of a skeleton body? I can tell you the best part. And I can tell you the worst part.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, I didn't realize there was a downside.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yes, you hanging with your uncle.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Sorry, Uncle Phibs. But the best part is feeling a sense of safety, like I belong somewhere. The worst part is that while skeletons cannot eat or drink, they sure can fart. Wow, this is.

[Dan Casey]

This is news to me.

[Jason Nguyen]

And he goes, crazy lore. Skeletons can fart.

[Dan Casey]

I don't understand how it works either.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And he goes, huh? And he actually takes out a notebook and writes it down and goes, don't write that. I'm gonna write that down.

[Dan Casey]

Please don't write that. Don't tell anyone how I live.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He says, you might be. I understand why a goblin might be friends with you.

[Dan Casey]

She's blaming me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You disgusting filth.

[Dan Casey]

She's just blaming me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He hands over mushrooms to you? Two of each. All right, so you've got eight mushrooms. One type is a hearty truffle, and it will return the user to full health. He explains this to you. One is a clover mushroom, which gives a next D20 roll advantage. This blush room, which gives you plus one to strength checks and advantage on constitution saves and checks. And the brawler's button, that adds an extra 1d6 damage. And you have resistance to bludgeoning damage. All of these last for five minutes.

[Dan Casey]

Wow, I didn't realize there was so many indigenous mycoids in the area.

[Amy Vorpahl]

There sure are. And we goblins do know the best ways to prepare them to get the best bang for your buck.

[Dan Casey]

I think you already got all my bucks.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yep. Got other business. Look, customers lining up.

[Dan Casey]

So I look around. Is there anyone?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Nope.

[Dan Casey]

I turn back and he's gone.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, yes, he's gone.

[Dan Casey]

Oh, he's fast.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. Busy. Your job is to ask around about the judge. You want to know certain things about him.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah. My two goals are I want to know about the judge and I want to know about the other competitors.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. Okay. So you do see Glomgon. He is an old goblin with a crusty old gray hair and he's dressed more in animal skins. Many, many animal skins. Every other goblin looks like they're wearing some version of leather armor. He is surrounded by goblins making shows of themselves. One goblin is doing cartwheels. One goblin jumps from the stage and lands right on Glamgen's head. He shakes. He knows what his job is. He's looking around at different people doing different performances. He's being brought different foods, different animals, that kind of thing.

[Danielle Radford]

Can I kind of like, by watching him, can I get a sense of like, does he have a good poker face? Or like, can I see, like, if he's looking at something and kind of digging it? Or if he's looking at something and he's like, ugh, gross.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Pass. He's got a pretty good poker face, but go ahead and make an inside check.

[Danielle Radford]

Okay, tight. That's a five.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That's a five. That'S a five. Yeah. He's nodding. He's in gratitude as these people make their presentations and turning to the next.

[Danielle Radford]

Goblin, is there anything. Is he standing around or is he at a table? What's around him?

[Amy Vorpahl]

He is nearby. A table? Yeah, like a bar table where he might set his chalice. He's also got what looks like an advisor next to him as well, a female goblin who's kind of corralling arranging the goblins as to who can approach and who needs to hang back for a bit.

[Danielle Radford]

Does she have a clipboard, this goblin?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Danielle Radford]

Okay. So Busy is going to sneak and see if she can get a peek of the names of all the other competitors on the clipboard and see if there's any relevant notes on there.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay? Okay. Okay. So this will be a stealth check. See if she's noticing that you got.

[Jason Nguyen]

This biz, big biz 23. Oh, hell.

[Danielle Radford]

There's no case.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, you see many different names and all of them have some notes written by them. With a 23, you're able to see that there does seem to be this recurring theme in these notes. It's basically that she's written, seen it, seen it, seen it.

[Danielle Radford]

Gotcha.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Not all of them are filled up. I would say about half at this point, some of them are saying it's too gross or not goblin enough. But for the most part it's seen it.

[Danielle Radford]

And so that's what I can see that's on there.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And you do see the names that have already been mentioned. You've seen the bus flogs and you see Pekara's name as well. Dog nozzle.

[Danielle Radford]

What does it say about Picara?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Nothing yet.

[Danielle Radford]

Nothing yet. Okay, busy is going to then go start winding her way through the crowd and see if she can overhear any of the competitors like talking to their teams.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, you're able to pretty. I mean with the banners you're able to tell who's who. Yeah, you can overhear one conversation. Let's see a perception check. Okay.

[Danielle Radford]

11.

[Amy Vorpahl]

An 11. Okay. So this is Erky's team. Erkie is the champion. Erki Erkie. And he does have a last name. It is Floodgunk.

[Jason Nguyen]

Floodgunk, Yep.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Urky's team is discussing and she's saying that she might want to pull a prank on him. Like basically remove all of the animal furs from him and just have him be chest bare in front of everybody and see what he might think of that. There are plenty of other people you can listen to as well.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, I want to listen to just whoever is like, I want to get an idea of what their strategy is going to be.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, roll another perception check.

[Danielle Radford]

Impressing him. Eleven.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Eleven. Okay. This is Paoba Slampers.

[Danielle Radford]

Pow ba.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Slampers. How did I spend most of my prep? So, pal, the slampers team is discussing how they might burn off all of the judges hair, including his eyebrow hair.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, geez. Okay, I want to now I guess start like talking to some sort of like the people around.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, okay. Yeah, you're able to strike a conversation. Pretty charismatic. You approach a particularly well refined goblin, you get the sense that they may know a little bit more about this judge. And this goblin does not look like they've participated in any of the events. They're just kind of watching. They don't have any facial hair. They have smaller ears than most and they've got kind of a raised eyebrow. Raised the whole crowd kind of being an objective critic.

[Danielle Radford]

Well, hello, well met.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, hello, well met.

[Danielle Radford]

And how are you on this beautiful Goblin Games eve?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, all right. Yeah. Well, look, Skeleton.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, jeez.

[Amy Vorpahl]

What do you want from me?

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, I'm just. I'm here to like make merry. It's a great party. Is it not lovely, all of the various foods and smells.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, it is lovely, isn't it? Are you enjoying yourself?

[Danielle Radford]

I am. And my name is Bizzy. What's your name?

[Amy Vorpahl]

My name is Zibber. Zibber Swampspit.

[Danielle Radford]

Zu Ziber Swampspit.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Just Zibber. Sorry.

[Danielle Radford]

Zibber Swampspit.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Zibber Swampspit.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, it's very nice to meet you. Zipper Swapspit. Are you competing today or are you merely observing?

[Amy Vorpahl]

I just have to. I just have to ask. Where did you get your training in small talk? It is exquisite.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, my goodness. Thank you so much. You know, I've been practicing a lot.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Because your small talk is making me feel inconsequential.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, I'm so sorry.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, in a good way. You're doing great.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, that's great. Feel less. Feel less. I guess I'm glad that I can make you feel feel small. You know, I'm here with Tippi.

[Amy Vorpahl]

All right.

[Danielle Radford]

Tippy. Terror Squad.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, yes, the earless one.

[Danielle Radford]

Yeah, he's missing an ear.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes. The most notable thing about him.

[Danielle Radford]

I've heard it is not the most notable thing about him. Do you know that he took on the Scythe of Erythia? I know. Take it in. Take it in.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I didn't believe you.

[Danielle Radford]

You don't believe me?

[Amy Vorpahl]

No. But it seems that you once. Something from me. Do you want my support for Tippy? Everyone's been clamoring after my support for the goblins.

[Danielle Radford]

I am looking for your support.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. I have not chosen a champion yet.

[Danielle Radford]

Well, what do you mean?

[Amy Vorpahl]

And I may not, actually.

[Danielle Radford]

Why not? Why wouldn't you choose a champion? What fun is it if you don't have anyone to cheer for?

[Amy Vorpahl]

It would show my hand. I might decide right before the games tomorrow.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, you're keeping it very close to the chest.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes, I'm trying to see what Lomgin thinks as well.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, so you're waiting to see if. So if the judge.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, if he's giving someone favor. I would like to give favor to someone else.

[Danielle Radford]

You want to give favor to someone that the judge is not going to give favor to?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yes.

[Danielle Radford]

Do you not like the judge?

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, my God.

[Danielle Radford]

Spill the tea. Tell me everything.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, he just seems. He just seems very specific in what he does appreciate. And it always is. Look, it's like he's trying to be someone he's not. He's always into what the kids are into.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, so he's like, trying to be down with the kids.

[Dan Casey]

Yes.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Instead of going, well, what do I think he's going, well, what's hip and hot today?

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, so he wants to be like, on the cutting edge, like, in front of the curve. But he doesn't know what that even means.

[Amy Vorpahl]

He has his look. He does get the young folk to tell him and everything. But it is performative.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, so does he do, like, any of the embarrassing young kid dances?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Nothing like a dance, but he. And he surely doesn't do it. But it is things like that that he does like. It's not really a dance that they think these days that the children are doing.

[Danielle Radford]

Well, what are the kids around here doing?

[Amy Vorpahl]

You know, just little things to show that they like each other.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, so right now, what's, like, really hip is sincerity and, like, selflessness new. Oh, so what's really hip right now is, like, big, bold show. Grand gestures. Grand gestures.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So I think it's a handful of different gestures, but I haven't quite figured out what it is yet. But it is. It's like a gross show of affection. Oh.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh. He's in it for the drama.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Sure.

[Danielle Radford]

That is fantastic.

[Amy Vorpahl]

But that's not what I'm into either.

[Danielle Radford]

Well, what are you into?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, I'll know exactly what I'm into as soon as the judge makes his call.

[Danielle Radford]

Okay, I gotcha. Hey, it was really, really nice meeting you. Zip. Zip.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Zip.

[Danielle Radford]

Zillow.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Zipper.

[Danielle Radford]

Zipper. Zipper. It was so nice meeting you.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Zipper. Yes, it was nice. It was really, actually. I mean, you as a skeleton, you really have changed my mind a little bit. Lots of decorum with you.

[Danielle Radford]

Oh, okay. Well, I'm glad I could be one of the good ones. I'm just gonna go over here. It was very nice meeting you. And busy. Just walks off like, I feel dirty.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Awesome.

[Danielle Radford]

I feel super gross.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. And you're trying to approach your brother and sister.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm trying to just beeline to Jack and Tog.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Jack and Tog. They are together. They do have their own squad supporting them. But you're able to find immediately you remember what they look like, and you know they're there. They notice you right away.

[Jason Nguyen]

How long has it been since I've seen them?

[Amy Vorpahl]

So in goblin years, you're seven or seven years old. I'm like eight.

[Jason Nguyen]

Eight or nine or something.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. But that's about 21. So it's definitely been five years.

[Jason Nguyen]

It's been five years.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah. Maybe over five.

[Jason Nguyen]

Since you were two. And Juck and Taog, what do they look like?

[Amy Vorpahl]

So they are taller than you. They're like. They're actually like 4 foot 2, 4 foot 3, and they're big and burly. Muscular. Tog. She's got A mohawk. And Juc is completely bald. Both of them are completely inked up. Tatted everywhere.

[Jason Nguyen]

Brother Sister. Didn't think you'd see me again, huh?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, look who it is. Look who it is, Tog. It's little Tippy. Man, look at that guy. How are you still alive?

[Jason Nguyen]

I haven't missed you two. I just want you to know I'm completing in the. I'm competing in the Goblin Games.

[Amy Vorpahl]

What was that?

[Jason Nguyen]

I want you to know I'm competing in the Goblin Games and I'm not here to lose.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Tippy, what are you talking about?

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm different now. The Tippy that you used to push around? Well, he's dead. He literally died. Well, speak.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay.

[Jason Nguyen]

I died when I was weak. Lame. Tippy. And I came back strong. Tippy. And also I got a gun. That has a lot to do with it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, are you still fiddling with little contraptions like guns?

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, fiddling. Well, let me show you something. And I go like three shots, like rapid succession in the air.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, let me show you something. And grabs you and gives you like a noggie on your head. Remember this?

[Jason Nguyen]

I don't like that. And I try to throw him off of me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, amazing. Okay, so go and make an acrobatics check.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. That's gonna be 22. I just went on to 15 plus 4.

[Danielle Radford]

Okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And you're very able to like make a throw. Juck down to the ground. And he goes.

[Jason Nguyen]

I put my foot on him and I point the gun right at his head.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Damn. Jesus. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Uh huh.

[Jason Nguyen]

It's a little different when Tippy's got a gun.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh my. Okay, okay. Get off. Get off, brother.

[Jason Nguyen]

Say I'm smelly and weak.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, I like that. I'm smell it.

[Jason Nguyen]

Say I'm clean and smart. No, I cock the hammer back. Say it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, say it.

[Jason Nguyen]

Say it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Say it.

[Jason Nguyen]

Jack.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm clean and smart. Ah, Clean and smart.

[Jason Nguyen]

And say you love skeletons.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I love skeletons.

[Jason Nguyen]

And I take my foot off him. I'm like, scram, you little.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So he does. He like kind of backs away, but Tog is letting us. Wow, Chippy, it seems like you have grown. So since you're here, I do have a question.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

You took dad's frog in a jar when you left.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. So do you have it? Do I have it? No, I lost it. But that was. What's the point of that? Why are you bringing up the frog?

[Amy Vorpahl]

You were never punished for it. Cause you left.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, I don't think I deserve to be Punished because I went through punishment enough.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Tell it to Lump. Daddy.

[Jason Nguyen]

He. I thought he wasn't coming to the game. I thought. He doesn't. He's above stuff like this.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, he's not competing.

[Jason Nguyen]

He's not gonna be here, though.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Maybe he's not here yet.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, I'm not afraid of him anymore. And if he wants to do something about the frog, well, I say come and do something about the frog.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Well, just like there are ways to help people out at the games, there are ways to hinder opponents, too.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, just know I'm out to hinder you with my gun and bullets. That's right.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No, I'm gonna get you.

[Jason Nguyen]

I've got a new family now. We're called the Terrorist Palm.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, look, you just collect families, don't you? Get adopted here, go get adopted there. Sounds like you're just moving from family to family. No one actually wants you.

[Jason Nguyen]

No, I didn't ask to be adopted. I didn't ask. And I didn't ask to be part of your savage, animal herding, goblin ways. I just wanted to build things. Things that loved me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And that's why your first family sold you. And that's why our family sold you.

[Jason Nguyen]

But you know what? My new family loves me. And that's something you'll never know.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'll get out of here.

[Jason Nguyen]

I think I will. I'll see you around the games, punk. And I walk away towards my friends. But trying to see if the judge is looking at any of this.

[Amy Vorpahl]

The judge has taken. I mean, a lot of goblins have taken note. You just threw another goblin.

[Jason Nguyen]

If the judge is looking at me, I want to wink at him.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. Yeah. You wink at the judge and you walk away. The three of you are able to reconvene back at the party. A dance has started. And one thing that you do notice is that Pekara has many, many goblins asking her to do kind of of a do, si do dance with her. And she is dancing with another fellow goblin.

[Jason Nguyen]

I try. I try not to look.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. Hey, hey, hey, guys.

[Dan Casey]

Dance with her.

[Jason Nguyen]

No.

[Dan Casey]

I might be able to learn some of her tactics, you know, just for the Goblin Games, that's all.

[Jason Nguyen]

Can I ask you guys a question? Yeah. Yeah. Are we a family?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay, good. Because I. I made like a big stink of it back there with my.

[Dan Casey]

You have a niece that lives inside of my body?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

Guess I am an unky. Oh, weird. I said unky.

[Dan Casey]

That's a bad mouthfeel.

[Jason Nguyen]

Well, before I go dance, what'd you guys Learn.

[Danielle Radford]

So I learned. Apparently the judge really wants to be hip with the kids and something that all of the kids that are doing now, I mean, I guess it'd be like gobposal, where they're doing these really huge shows of affection in front of other people.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. Like a love bombs situation, but not actual bombs.

[Danielle Radford]

More the other definition of love bombing. So no real bombs. I want to be very clear that you should not throw a bomb at Bakura.

[Jason Nguyen]

Gunpowder.

[Danielle Radford]

No gunpowder, no kegger, no rager. We're not turning this kegger into a rager.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay?

[Danielle Radford]

The only thing you want raging is you want to get Cora's heart raging and get her away, I think, from all of those other little lame Do Si Doan goblins. And if you make a big deal of showing her that you're really cool and you want to dance with her, that might actually impress the judge and make you get the judge's favor.

[Jason Nguyen]

So it's not for love, it's strategic. I can do that dance with Picor. So the judge gives me favor. Nothing about that is romantic. I could do that.

[Dan Casey]

I also got you a bunch of mushrooms.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, I don't know if I'm ready for that level of experimentation.

[Dan Casey]

Trust me, you're gonna want these shrooms.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay.

[Dan Casey]

Open your mind and your body to new experiences.

[Danielle Radford]

Well, if you want to open the.

[Jason Nguyen]

Doors of perception, I mean, I'll do it if you do it.

[Dan Casey]

I would just fall through my mouth.

[Jason Nguyen]

And can I ask a favor?

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

If a big goblin comes around and he's got nipple rings, that's my dad and I'd rather not have to deal with him. So just like my brothers and sisters said something about hindering, they might try to mess with our game.

[Dan Casey]

That's what the mushrooms are for.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay, Fus. Are you just. You want me to get high or like.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Not right now.

[Jason Nguyen]

Tomorrow. All right. Yeah. All right.

[Dan Casey]

Before the big night when it's important.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Yeah, before the end of the night. Judge Glomgen has not chosen who to give favor to yet. Is there anything you'd like to do in order to gain favor?

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah. I walk straight up to Pekora Pekara and I look at the judge and I go, oh, Judge, Mr. Judge, I hear you've got a soft heart for a soft heart. And I'm here to claim this dance, m'lady, and I put my hand out.

[Amy Vorpahl]

To Pekora and Pecora says, oh, that's nice. Mid Ant. Card's full for the rest of the night, actually.

[Jason Nguyen]

Oh, really? Maybe there's Room for one more. Maybe somebody who'd like to dance with you. And maybe.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Is that why you said the judges in your speech and not mine?

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. I feel like I owe you an apology. And I want to say, hikara, I'm sorry, but you don't know the things that I worry about. I can't stop thinking about you, but not like what you think. I just can't stop thinking about you getting hurt. And I worry about you. And I don't. I'd never let anything hurt you. I'd die for you.

[Amy Vorpahl]

So what's the apology? You said, I'm sorry. I'm so scared.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm sorry I'm. I'm the way that I am.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Oh, yeah, me too.

[Jason Nguyen]

No, Pekora, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry that I. I'm sorry I didn't appreciate everything you've done for me.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Mm.

[Jason Nguyen]

You stood by my side and you really cared about me, and I. I sort of gave you that cold shoulder. But maybe it's time to warm the shoulders up with a dance.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Is that good? Is that. Am I saying right?

[Dan Casey]

Fibs and busy. Both leaning in, giving huge thumbs up. Look like I think she's fine.

[Jason Nguyen]

Warm our shoulders up. I feel crazy things are coming out of me that I. I don't expect.

[Amy Vorpahl]

That's not good, Tibby. Look, I stood by your side while you were getting resurrected. And she's doing this while she's dancing with someone else.

[Jason Nguyen]

Sorry. Sorry.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Stood by your side when you were getting resurrected. And I thought that when you made that grand gesture, you were doing it to save me. Then you got killed and had a new lease on and immediately threw it away. You thought you threw it away.

[Jason Nguyen]

You don't understand. I. I love you.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Is this for the judge, then?

[Jason Nguyen]

No, it's for you. I love you. And because I love you, I'm scared. And because I'm scared, I don't think I can be with you because it kind of feels like death follows me around.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay, so this is the same conversation we've already had, so I don't know why you're telling me this again.

[Jason Nguyen]

Just dance with me. Just. Please.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'll dance with you, but I don't understand what you're trying to convince me of.

[Jason Nguyen]

I grab pokora and.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Okay. And go off, and you start dancing, and she does kind of soften in your arms a little bit. And you're doing the do si do, and you see her frustration kind of melt away, and she's having a good time. She says all Right. Tippi, I can't be bothered with this right now. I've got a competition to win.

[Jason Nguyen]

Listen, listen. I want to be champion to protect you. And I know you don't need much protecting. You've got your gun back. But you gotta understand. Tippi, hold on. You gotta understand that I didn't know love. I didn't have it. My relative speed on me. They. They made fun of me for wanting love. And when I met you, I thought I felt something new. And then all I felt was fear. So everything I've done is because I'm afraid. But if I know that I have your support and I can keep you safe, well, I guess I could shoot just about or do just about anything.

[Amy Vorpahl]

All right, Tibby. Well, I want to talk to you about this. But you've just made an entire argument about yourself. You've asked me nothing about myself. You know nothing. You don't know the hardships I've had too. You don't even know what I'm afraid of.

[Jason Nguyen]

You're right.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Thank you so much for telling me.

[Jason Nguyen]

You're right. I don't deserve you. But I just want you to know that. Well, that's how I feel. And it's all on the table.

[Amy Vorpahl]

As long as you understand that my strength doesn't come from me holding a gun.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay, that's crazy. Cause I thought it did.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No.

[Jason Nguyen]

Okay. Wow.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No. I'm strong because I am who I am.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, you are.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And I'm really comfortable with that.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah, you are.

[Amy Vorpahl]

If I was ever going to be with a goblin.

[Jason Nguyen]

Yeah.

[Amy Vorpahl]

They would have to be really comfortable with who they are.

[Jason Nguyen]

What about a goblin? Who's working on it.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'll see you at the games, Tippy.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'll see you at the games.

[Amy Vorpahl]

And at that moment, the romance has ended. The judge has turned his head away and he actually.

[Dan Casey]

You just posted Cringe, bro.

[Jason Nguyen]

Dammit.

[Amy Vorpahl]

His assistant actually announces the person who shall gain Blomkin's favor tomorrow is Pekara Donknazzo, for she gave the judge Glomgan a wet willy.

[Jason Nguyen]

What?

[Dan Casey]

So gross.

[Danielle Radford]

It's so.

[Jason Nguyen]

I thought that was our thing, but okay.

[Amy Vorpahl]

It's like for part as you are dealing with some complicated emotions, that is where we will end this episode. Yes, that is it for Sagas of Sundry Goblin Mode. Tune in next time for some Goblin Games. Sagas of Sundry Goblin Mode is a geek and sundry production made in partnership with Realm. I'm Amy Vorpahl, your dungeon master. Danielle Radford plays busy. Jason Wynn is Tippy and Fibs is played by Dan Casey. Goblin Mode is directed and produced by Graham Ehler Shelley, executive produced by Dan Casey, story produced by Rin Ehler Sheldon and Shawan Edward, with creative producing by Adam Murray and editing by Matt Caron. Our theme music is composed by Alex Winkler and our production coordinator is Tara Goldsboro. Platform support and logo design provided by Alison Mattingly, with additional writing support from Rin Ehler Sheldon, Dan Casey and Amy Ratcliffe. Audio recorded by Jim Funicelli and social media support from Lee Travis. Additional production support from Alex Niknajad, Patrick McElroy and Grant Semayoa. Visit Geek and Sundry on YouTube or geekandsundry.com for video versions of Sagas of Goblin Mode. I'd find a hole that worked. Yeah.

[Jason Nguyen]

You should Listen to the GamesReady biz microcast.

[Amy Vorpahl]

More people are playing games than ever before.

[Jason Nguyen]

They've never been more popular, and the.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Business behind it is facing some real challenges and changes. There's been tens of thousands of layoffs.

[Jason Nguyen]

Hundreds of studio closures as major companies face rising costs and falling sales.

[Dan Casey]

There's uncertainty around the future of game consoles.

[Jason Nguyen]

There's legal and government intervention into how games are even being paid for.

[Amy Vorpahl]

The role of AI is changing how games are being made.

[Jason Nguyen]

There's the impact of games like Fortnite and Roblox dominating everyone's time.

[Dan Casey]

And then there's the desperate wait for.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Switch 2 and GTA 6.

[Dan Casey]

And that's just 2024.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Two leading business journalists with a combined.

[Jason Nguyen]

35 years of experience offer you a weekly guide through all of this and more.

[Amy Vorpahl]

I'm Christopher dring, head of GamesIndustry Biz.

[Jason Nguyen]

I'm James Batchelor, editor in chief of.

[Amy Vorpahl]

GameStry Biz, and you can join us.

[Jason Nguyen]

Every Monday for the gamesindustry Biz Microcast, the most important stories, expert guests, exclusive market data, and all in less than 30 minutes.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Usually.

[Jason Nguyen]

The GameStry Biz microcast every Monday on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Hi, this is Rob Benedict and I am Richard Speight. We were both on a little show.

[Jason Nguyen]

You might know, called Supernatural. It had a pretty good run, 15 seasons, 327 episodes, and though we have seen, of course, every episode many times, we figured, hey, now that we're wrapped, let's watch it all again. And we can't do that alone. So we're inviting the cast and crew that made the show along for the ride. We've got writers, producers, composers, directors, and we'll of course have some actors on as well including some certain guys that.

[Amy Vorpahl]

Played some certain pretty iconic brothers.

[Jason Nguyen]

It was kind of a little bit of a left field choice in the best way possible.

[Danielle Radford]

The note from Kripke was he's great. We love him, but we're looking for like a really intelligent Duchovny type with.

[Dan Casey]

15 seasons to expect explore.

[Jason Nguyen]

It's going to be the road trip of several lifetimes. So please join us and subscribe to Supernatural then and now.

[Dan Casey]

Ladies and gentlemen.

[Jason Nguyen]

What are you doing? What do you mean? Keep it simple.

[Dan Casey]

I'm making the promo.

[Jason Nguyen]

Just keep it simple. Just say, hey, we're the Brav bros. Two guys to talk about Bravo.

[Dan Casey]

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, we're the Brav bro.

[Amy Vorpahl]

No.

[Dan Casey]

Out.

[Jason Nguyen]

Dude, stop with the voice. Just keep it simple.

[Dan Casey]

I've seen promos on tv, dude. This is how you get the fans engaged. This is how you get listeners. We're trying to get listeners here. If we just say, oh, we're two dudes that talk about Bravo, people are.

[Jason Nguyen]

Going to get tired of it already.

[Amy Vorpahl]

We need some oomph.

[Jason Nguyen]

All right then fine. Let's try to do it with your voice. Brav bros. Good job.