Dan Bernstein Unfiltered Recap
Episode: Chicago Bears - Green Bay Packers: It’s Meaningful Again
Date: December 4, 2025
Host: Dan Bernstein
Executive Producer: Matt Abbatacola
Episode Overview
This episode returns to the rejuvenated significance of the Chicago Bears-Green Bay Packers rivalry, which now matters for divisional supremacy after years of lopsided results. Dan and Matt reflect on why Bears-Packers is finally "earned" again as each team is competitive. They also cover Chicago Bulls woes and salient NBA notes, indulge in humorous stories about college football super-fans, dissect the Penn State football debacle, address suburban Chicago crime with comedic flair, and provide a memorable kit-kat candy review.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
The Bears-Packers Rivalry: Why It Matters Again
[02:44–09:14]
- Historical Weight: Dan recalls the rich lore—Lee Remmel’s talk of “primordial rivalry,” the McCaskeys and George Halas.
- “It matters again because both teams are good enough for it to matter. It's been a minute, but now this... it's earned it now.” — Dan [03:29]
- Past Lulls: Bears fans have tried too hard to stoke rivalry in recent years, but now, “that’s when we’re not just screwing around, trying to make something out of nothing.” — Dan [05:03]
- Now There’s Impact: Both teams have division stakes, with two games left, including a soon-to-be national Saturday night broadcast.
- “It’s finally here that the games actually matter more than just a win or loss and bragging rights.” — Matt [05:35]
- National Spotlight: Thanksgiving game viewership cited as evidence of revived interest. Expect “crazy numbers” for Bears-Packers matchups. [06:30]
- Rivalry Spirit (and Sanity): Acknowledges it’s fun “as long as you understand it’s just that” and playfully jabs at raising rival-fan kids.
- “If you do subscribe to the Danny Parkins theory... less hatred in the real world, more hatred in sports. Here’s your chance.” — Dan [07:18]
- Instant Classic Call: Matt teases Dan with “instant classic” predictions for Sunday, to Dan’s playful irritation. [08:16]
Bears Podcast Network & App Launch
[00:43–02:44, 09:27–10:36]
- Dan and Matt unveil the new 312 Sports app, available free on iOS and Android, promising contests, rewards, audio/video uploads, and instant community feedback.
- Push notifications will directly ping users for live shows and breaking content.
- “There’s going to be rewards for you... Freebies, discounts, all that… just for listening…” — Dan [00:44]
- “We couldn’t have gotten any luckier with a 9-3 start here and… the team being the number one seed…” — Matt [10:17]
Chicago Bulls Crisis Mode
[10:36–19:59]
- Team “Rock Bottom”: The Bulls are “the worst team in the NBA right now,” hampered by injuries, G League call-ups, and egregious defensive lapses.
- Dan lauds broadcaster Adam Amin’s “rock bottom intervention” on-air honesty.
- “They are softer than wet newspaper.” — Dan [12:52]
- Accountability: Cites Vucevic’s warning (“this isn’t sustainable”) and Donald's challenge to either lay down the law or change course.
- "They've got to play hard and smart to be competitive... and they're not." — Dan [12:28]
- Individual Player Notes:
- Noah Clowney praised for energy: “He was a guy that was playing hard. He was playing with effort.” — Matt [15:39]
- Dan notes Clowney’s rising production and highlights NBA’s influx of young “real dudes.”
- Modest Bouzelis and Josh Giddey get mixed reviews; Bulls lack toughness and rim protection.
- Outlook: They look destined for a bottom seed, “which puts them right… in that play-in thing again. And if that’s what you want to consistently be, well, good luck.” — Matt [18:42]
NBA Roundup & Chicago Sports Nuggets
[19:15–24:10]
- Noah Assange Injury: Bulls’ 2025 first-round pick out for year with shoulder surgery, missing critical G League development: “He’s a child.” — Dan [19:30]
- Chris Paul Clippers Exit: Recap based on The Athletic’s reporting: “His constant criticism internally… was the perceived problem... There was a direct request for him to stop with ‘the locker room lawyering.’” — Dan [23:15]
- NBA Injury Watch: Concern mounts over Giannis’s calf strain as star player injuries increase, possibly due to league’s pace of play.
College Football Corner
Diego Pavia and the “Drink & Win” Family
[30:07–39:48]
- The Pavia Brothers: Diego Pavia’s mother and rowdy brothers (Roel and Javier) are infamous for drunken, shirtless, gold-chain super-fandom—and multiple arrests.
- “People are wondering, why do your brothers keep getting arrested?... both been jailed for being drunk and disorderly… Diego Pavia seems cool with it…” — Dan [31:59]
- Diego’s quote on Bussin' With the Boys: “Next year, get hammered as much as you want. That’s the only time we win.” — Dan [33:17]
- Superstition: The brothers have to be drunk and stupid for Kentucky to win.
- “How about just get drunk without being stupid?” — Matt [34:52]
- Albuquerque GTA: Diego claims Albuquerque is like “real life Grand Theft Auto,” with Matt doubting any city matches the video game’s lawlessness.
Penn State Disaster
[43:37–50:18]
- CBS headline: “Penn State’s botched coaching search turns signing day into unprecedented disaster.” — Dan [43:44]
- “The Nittany Lions have lost over 20 commitments since James Franklin’s firing and plummeted to number 150 in the 2026 class rankings.” — Dan [44:00]
- Satirical (but poignant) rant about Penn State’s institutional identity crisis:
- “Let’s wear buttons that remind people of that… Embrace the institutional facilitation of child rape... Hooray for child rape!” — Dan [48:42 & 50:02]
- News of 24 de-commits; discussion of “JoeBots” and Penn State’s cultural denial.
Local News: Naperville Crime & Satire
[50:28–53:48]
- Felon arrested at Naperville Lucky Strike bowling alley after leaving a loaded gun visible in car.
- Dan notes: “We are making progress… Word is out on the street: The Top Golf too high… Maybe they’re moving on to the bowling alley.”
Irreverent Candy Review & Closing Banter
Kit Kat Horror
[55:01–61:58]
- Dan details a mistake in his “discount grocery rescue” hobby: Halloween candy buy containing “affronts to human existence.”
- Witch’s Brew Kit Kat: “Don’t eat these… If you took a Kit Kat and instead of chocolate you covered it in a distillation… of circus peanut… the essence of that bite is what this tastes like.” — Dan [58:29–60:43]
- Regular Kit Kat Critique: “I criticize KitKat intensely because I love KitKat.” — Dan [61:17]
- Matt jokes anyone who likes circus peanuts is “definitely a serial killer.”
- Both agree: Stick to classic offerings (“Just a regular Kit Kat is fine. This one, not great… you have to find all of these, round them up and bury them.” — Dan [61:34])
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “It matters again because both teams are good enough for it to matter. It’s been a minute, but now this... it’s earned it now.” — Dan Bernstein [03:29]
- “They are softer than wet newspaper.” — Dan Bernstein on the Bulls [12:52]
- “If you do subscribe to the Danny Parkins theory, the Parkins doctrine... more hatred in sports. Here’s your chance.” — Dan Bernstein [07:18]
- “They like drinking... they go shirtless with overalls... a bunch of buttons and gold chains and cowboy hats...” — Dan Bernstein on the Pavia brothers [31:24]
- “How about just get drunk without being stupid?” — Matt Abbatacola [34:52]
- “Let’s wear buttons that remind people of that... Hooray for child rape! Have fun.” — Dan Bernstein's satirical take on Penn State’s coaching saga [50:02]
- “Don’t eat these. This Witch’s Brew... if you took a Kit Kat and covered it in... circus peanut... after a hot car trip, that’s what this tastes like.” — Dan Bernstein [58:29–60:43]
Segment Timestamps for Reference
- Bears-Packers Rivalry Beginning: [02:44]
- NFC North Division Stakes: [05:35]
- App Launch and Network News: [00:44, 09:27]
- Bulls Deep Dive: [10:36–19:59]
- NBA & Sports Miscellany: [19:15–24:10]
- College Football/Diego Pavia: [30:07–39:48]
- Penn State Meltdown: [43:37–50:18]
- Naperville Crime Satire: [50:28–53:48]
- Candy Review & Closing Banter: [55:01–61:58]
Tone & Style
The episode blends sharp sports analysis, nostalgia, and humor with classic Bernstein irreverence. The tone is unfiltered, candid, and uniquely Chicagoan—equal parts rant, homage, and honest criticism.
Summary prepared for those who want both a comprehensive overview, timestamped highlights, and memorable flavor of Dan Bernstein Unfiltered with Matt Abbatacola.