Chicago Bears vs Browns: freezing temps, Caleb and the passing game and Myles Garrett

Summary

Dan Bernstein Unfiltered – Chicago Bears vs Browns: Freezing Temps, Caleb and the Passing Game, and Myles Garrett

Podcast: Dan Bernstein Unfiltered
Host: Dan Bernstein with longtime producer Matt Abbatacola
Episode Date: December 10, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this installment, Dan and Matt dive headfirst into upcoming Bears-Browns game day conditions, the reality of “Bears weather,” speed debates about the current Bears roster (and their comedic wheelbarrow race hypotheticals), a broader look at AI's everyday infiltration, tales of kitchen mishaps, and a deep tangent into the current state of college football bowls—invoking both humor and sharp perspective. The episode weaves hard sports analysis with lived Chicagoan experience, food chat, and irreverent banter.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Football in the Frigid: “Bears Weather” and Stadium Dreams

• Game Day Forecast
  • Temperatures for Bears-Browns predicted in the single digits, with a “real feel” of -7°F and 21 mph wind gusts.
    • “It’s going to be very cold.” (Dan Bernstein, 01:45)
    • “Extreme cold can be dangerous… everybody’s cold, everybody hates it. Cold sucks.” (Matt, 01:49; 03:01)
• Debunking the “Bears Weather” Edge
  • Both hosts mock the idea that Midwest winter conditions are an advantage, noting that nearly all players come from warmer places and nobody likes it.
  • “All the players are from Louisiana… everybody’s cold. Everybody hates it. Cold sucks.” (Matt, 03:01)
• The Stadium Roof Longing
  • Dan advocates for an indoor stadium:
    • “I’m all about playing football indoors.” (Dan, 03:30)
    • Shared hope for Kevin Warren and a climate-controlled future for Bears fans.

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2. The Fastest Bear and Wheelbarrow Olympics

• Debate Over the Fastest Chicago Bear
  • Luther Burden is tossed around as the likely fastest, with mention of Nishan Wright’s top sprint speed and Caleb Williams’ surprising quickness:
    • “Is it Luther Burden?” (Dan, 04:38)
    • “Sometimes Caleb looks faster. Is it Caleb?” (Matt, 09:23)
• Absurd “Wheelbarrow Race” Hypothetical
  • Matt posits Luther Burden racing Andrew Billings while pushing a wheelbarrow, then humorously escalates it to Burden pushing Tyson Bagent in the wheelbarrow.
    • “Could Burden outrace Andrew Billings if Burden were pushing an empty wheelbarrow?” (Matt, 10:38)
    • “So he has to push Tyson Bagent in a wheelbarrow while he races Andrew Billings. I think Andrew Billings wins.” (Dan, 15:27)
• AI Gets a Turn: How to Use a Wheelbarrow
  • The hosts ask Microsoft Copilot for wheelbarrow instructions, lampooning the modern need for AI advice in everyday matters.
    • “How would you have any idea how to use one without ChatGPT?” (Matt, 11:22)

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3. AI Everywhere: Silliness, Distrust, and Doomsaying

• AI Consumerism Satire
  • From “AI slippers” to “AI toilets,” Matt blasts the ubiquity of meaningless AI branding and questions the technology’s hype cycle.
    • “It’s like everything’s a pump and dump… Please, please, please buy something with AI in it.” (Matt, 06:16)
• Paranoia and Verification Fatigue
  • Dan laments the credibility crisis: “You have to double check everything now… you just can’t trust anything anymore.” (Dan, 06:57)
• Raising Kids with ChatGPT?
  • Both mock Sam Altman’s statement that “You can’t raise a child without ChatGPT.”
    • “I couldn’t even imagine what with it, right?” (Matt, 08:43)

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4. Kitchen Talk and Home Cooks’ War Stories

• Potatoes, Steaks, and Burned Thumbs
  • Matt details making a home-cooked breakfast inspired by Waffle House (hash browns, onions, steak medallions, sunny-side-up eggs), including a fresh oven burn:
    • “…I did not know the insulation in the thumb [of the mitt] had moved… I fried my thumb.” (Matt, 20:03)
    • “Copilot says touching hot pans without protection can cause severe burns instantly.” (Dan, 21:02)

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5. Nostalgia and Absurdity: Food, Childhood, and Camp Stories

• Food Attachments and Overeating Stories
  • The conversation drifts into food possessiveness, camp meals, and impressive eating feats:
    • “I did a whole bird [Popeye’s 8-piece] and a large mashed potatoes.” (Matt, 29:09)
• Hot Dogs at Camp
  • Matt recounts having to label hot dogs to avoid mix-ups at day camp (61:42).

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6. College Football Playoffs, Bowls, and Entitlement

• Vanderbilt Head Coach Clark Lea’s Mature Response
  • The hosts praise Lea for his no-excuse approach to missing the playoff, contrasting it with what they perceive as Notre Dame’s entitled reaction.
    • “We are not victims in this process. Our ownership is in coming up short…” (Clark Lea audio, 33:01)
• Debate Over Non-Playoff Bowls
  • Matt is skeptical about their future; Dan is hopeful, especially for programs like Vanderbilt, where a 10-win season and bowl trips mean a lot.
• Players Skipping Bowls
  • Both agree on player autonomy regarding skipping bowls for NFL prep, with no stigma attached.

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7. Offbeat: Fishing Tangents, Halibut, and More Races

• Ice Fishing and “Man Caves” on the Ice
  • Discussion of modern, fully-equipped ice shacks versus old-school discomfort.
• Luther Burden vs. Billings in a Fish-Carrying Sprint
  • The fictional event is now Burden carrying a 50lb halibut in a race against Billings.
    • “A halibut specifically is a hard fish to carry… for Luther’s safety, it’s dead.” (Matt, 55:15; Dan, 55:36)

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8. White Sox Win the Draft Lottery, “Rock” Chalowski Banter

• Sox Land #1 Pick; Daniel “Rock” Chalowski Noted as Favorite
  • “Always draft shortstops; you can play them anywhere.” (Dan, 59:12)
  • Segue into neighborhood chatter and whether “Rock” is a true South Side name.

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9. Bulls & NBA on Prime: Studio Shows and Personality Clashes

• Amazon NBA Desk Compared to TNT
  • Steve Nash’s lack of on-air charisma highlighted.
    • “He barely spoke audibly… Steve Nash says ‘black coffee’ and then there’s this long pause.” (Matt, 65:06)
    • Blake Griffin’s comic instincts get credited amidst the awkwardness.
• Attempting to Replicate the Famous TNT Basketball Show
  • “Stop trying to recreate the NBA on TNT.” (Matt, 66:01)

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• On “Bears Weather”
  • “Extreme cold can be dangerous for outdoor activities. Winds gusting up to 21 miles an hour and a real feel of seven below zero.” (Matt, 01:49)
• On the AI Craze
  • “It’s like everything’s a pump and dump… please, please, please buy something with AI in it.” (Matt, 06:16)
  • “You have to double check everything now… you just can’t trust anything anymore.” (Dan, 06:57)
• On Sam Altman & ChatGPT
  • “Sam Altman said you can’t raise a child without chat GPT.” (Matt, 08:42)
• On the Vanderbilt Approach to Playoff Snubs
  • “We are not victims in this process. Our ownership is in coming up short.” (Clark Lea, 33:01)
• On Non-Playoff Bowls’ Meaning
  • “For a lot of seniors, this is their final time to play football. Then they should be able to play.” (Dan, 37:14)
• On Chicago Weather & Fishing
  • “January 19th is the first sign of spring. First sign of spring is, like, March or June.” (Dan, 52:16)
  • “I hate bear weather.” (Dan, 52:20)
• On Modern Ice Fishing
  • “You’re sitting in a barca lounger… televisions, 72 degrees in there. You happen to have a hole in front of you and there’s fish underneath.” (Matt, 53:04)
• On NBA Studio Banter
  • “Steve Nash says, ‘black coffee,’ and then there’s this long pause. Was it Udonis Haslam?” (Matt, 65:06)
  • “Stop trying to recreate the NBA and TNT… you can’t touch that.” (Matt, 66:01)

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Running Jokes and Tone

• Frequent sarcastic jabs at sports clichés (“Bears weather”), the tech world’s AI obsession, and media excess.
• Good-natured ribbing between hosts, with Matt regularly accusing Dan of trying to “mess with him.”
• Ironic deep dives into food and camp nostalgia, always with a Chicago/local flavor.
• Absurdist sports hypotheticals (wheelbarrow races, fish-carrying sprints).
• Playful, at times brash, but always self-aware and accessible to the everyday Chicago sports fan.

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Key Timestamps

| Topic | Timestamp | |-----------------------------------------------|-------------| | Bears-Browns cold weather setup | 01:39–04:00 | | “Fastest Bear” debate and wheelbarrow talk | 04:25–11:28 | | AI in life/parenting skepticism | 05:19–09:13 | | Home cooking & kitchen injuries | 17:02–21:16 | | College football playoff, Clark Lea audio | 32:24–35:49 | | Non-playoff bowl philosophy | 36:14–37:38 | | Ice fishing “man cave” tangent | 52:37–53:51 | | White Sox and Rock Chalowski draft talk | 58:40–62:19 | | NBA on Prime studio segment critique | 64:07–66:01 | | Next episode preview: Top 10 Browns, feedback | 68:10–69:39 |

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For the Listener Who Missed It

If you’re looking for hard stats, serious football breakdown, and icy-hot Chicago sports takes—with hearty doses of laughs and local color—this episode delivers. The show covers everything from the reality of “Bears weather” to AI’s saturation of modern products, and even finds time for detailed recounting of kitchen disasters and the NCAA’s cultural shift. Through Dan and Matt’s irrepressible banter, you’ll get a slice of real Chicago, a few absurd hypotheticals, and enough personality to warm up any subzero gameday.

Transcript

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[Dan Bernstein]

Dan Bernstein unfiltered.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Unfiltered on 312 sports.

To it. Dan Bernstein Unfiltered. We are brought to you in partnership with my bookie. And a reminder, you can save big on gourmet gifts and more holiday favorites with Omaha Steaks and visit Omaha Steaks.com for 50% off site wide during their sizzle all the way sale. And for an extra $35 off, use promo code Bernstein at checkout terms apply C site for details. That's Omaha steaks.com with the code Bernstein. That's who I am. He's about a cola. We don't use that name as a code because it's too hard to spell.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. If people get it wrong.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

I'm not getting my discount. Well, you spelled it wrong. Damn it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's not hard though. I know it's not hard, but still we make it easy for people.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's hard to say B e R.

[Co-host/Commentator]

N S T e I n. It is going.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's super easy.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's going to be cold on Sunday. Really, really, really cold. You see this? Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's going to be very cold.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. Get ready.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's bears weather though, Dan. Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay. Like it was in Green Bay with the wind howling and cold and whatever. And then they're blaming the wind for the passing game. Okay. It is supposed to be in the single digits on Sunday with a real feel of -7 as of right now, all it says is frigid, plenty of sunshine. Extreme cold can be dangerous for outdoor activities. Winds gusting up to 21 miles an hour and a real feel of seven below zero.

[Dan Bernstein]

So if you're going to watch the game, watch it indoors.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That is great advice. Absolutely. Close your windows and you should have your rust should put in windows. So the Chicago window guys have given you this really, really good windows. You've gotten the best deal. Keep those windows all nice and closed and then watch the game at home. Yep.

[Dan Bernstein]

I may. So I. My couch. The one side of the couch sits right in front of the sliding glass door, so I may open it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Right. Okay. I know, exactly.

[Dan Bernstein]

So I have the. Yeah. So the wind and the weather comes in perfect. Right on me. So I feel like.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And then feel it. Frank can run outside and come back.

[Dan Bernstein]

Frank will just sit outside. He's a lunatic. Yeah, we have to beg him to come back inside.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, he's a. He's part. He's part Bernie's mountain dog. So he.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, he's fine.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. He just stays out there.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, he doesn't care. That's cool. But it's going to be one of these games. It's. They'll have the heaters and remember, all the players are from Louisiana. So when we start talking about bear weather and that whole thing, everybody's cold. Everybody hates it. Cold sucks. There'll be a bunch of offensive linemen with no sleeves because, you know, you got to do that, apparently. But we actually don't, so I don't. You have nothing to prove to me because I know cold hurts and it's. It's bad and bad for you and dangerous.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. I'm all about playing football indoors.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, me too.

[Dan Bernstein]

And I'm looking forward to the Bears, hopefully one day. Kevin Warren getting a shovel on the.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Ground gets that damn shovel.

[Dan Bernstein]

Getting a stadium built that has a roof that is. It's warm and it's. It's climate controlled, and it makes for no issues with weather when playing football.

[Co-host/Commentator]

All right, So I, you know, I do my usual show prep and I knew my routine. Now we're. What are we, three and a half months in and I'm getting in my routine. I'm like, all right, Bears this and Bears that. I'm reading all the Bears stuff and I'm looking over, looking at browns and rosters and depth charts and blocking schemes. And then, you know, I said, oh, my. I'm not in the mood for it.

We've got forward progress coming up. We got Matt Miller and forward progress and like, all, like, you know, talk about zone blocking and man blocking and route combinations. I. I just was like, I'm not in the mood today.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I can't explain why. I'm just.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's fine.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Can I ask you this?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yep.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Who's the. Somebody asked me this and it took me a second before. Usually I can answer this immediately. Who is the fastest player on the Bears?

[Dan Bernstein]

Is it Luther Burden?

[Co-host/Commentator]

That was my guess. The first thing I said was Luther Burden. And then I thought, didn't Nishan Wright on the pick six against the Vikings, didn't he reach like 21 miles an hour?

[Dan Bernstein]

I think I have to look. I haven't looked recently, but I think he's still in the top 10 of.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The next gen stats because we did that. We did. Like, his speed at the time seemed really fast and I don't know if he's still up there in that sprint speed. Is Nishan Wright the fastest Bear?

[Dan Bernstein]

Let's see. Well, a quick Google search of who is the fastest player on the Chicago Bears gives me Darnell Mooney. Hello, Google. That's. That ain't right.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Obviously, Sam Altman would tell you you're not using AI properly because he said he needs AI to raise his children. Has there ever been a more obvious pump and dump than what's going on with, like, consumer level AI?

Seriously, like, is it everything you see? Are we being begged and pleaded with at this point? You know what this reminds me of? It reminds me of the super bowl when they were hiring like Tom Brady and LeBron James and Matt Damon to try to sell you all these. These pump and dump crypto things.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, boy.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Remember that?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I do.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Fortune favors the brave. No, the bowl. It's bold, not brave. And no, I'm not buying whatever this meme coin is. No this AI stuff. Especially looking at Christmas gifts. AI coffee maker, AI slippers, AI toilets. Like, it is so AI slippers, everything.

[Clark Lea]

Okay?

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's like everything's a pump and dump. They're down to like the lowest retail level. Please, please, please buy something with AI in it. Otherwise all these companies are going away. I'm like, you know, you know what I kind of like every once in a while thinking, Yeah, I heard a.

[Dan Bernstein]

Portion of reading a podcast not too long ago that had a, like, cybersecurity expert on. He might have been from Google or maybe came from Google, but he talked about AI being the complete destruction of humanity.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, sure.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, that's where it's headed.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm way in between the doomsayers and all of the converts and the AI.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, you know why I hate it now? Anything I see now, I've got it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like, you have to.

[Dan Bernstein]

You have to double check everything now.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Because chances are you just can't trust anything anymore. So much is wrong. Because nobody wants to think, like, how.

[Dan Bernstein]

Made up is this video that they take an actual you Know person's video and then they use AI to have their voice and say whatever they wanted to say.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's. I saw a video yesterday that was awesome and I sent it to my brother in law. It's a. It's a video from like the, the. It's like 1970 or something like that. And it's an Italian television show and it's Stevie Wonder playing drums.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It is unbelievable, but it's not right.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's not real.

[Co-host/Commentator]

But it is. It is. But I was pissed off that my first thought was, well, this isn't real. I'm sure this, this is fake. Somebody made this. And it's, you know, black and white and it's. It's Stevie Wonder absolutely going off in one of the most incredible drum performances you've ever seen in your life. And he's got like a famous Italian guitarist who's with him. It is incredible. And I'm mad that part of me is like, well, this can't be real. This probably isn't real. There's no way this is real. Somebody made this. And it is, it is. It is actually real. Like, we've seen this guy play any kind of keyboard whatsoever. We've seen him play with the harmonica and whatever they call that harmonica with the button that has multiple keys. But it is. I was just mad that I'm like, okay, well, now I don't know if this is real, but I confirmed it and it is. But there's everything. Stop begging me. Stop begging me and stop gaslighting. You can't. Sam Altman said you can't raise a child without chat GPT.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I don't understand that. What do you.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I couldn't even imagine what with it, right?

[Dan Bernstein]

Like, what do you use? Check out a GPT with the.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Raise your kid. Raise a kid. Do you know how long children have been raised? Like, well, now I don't know how you can do it. Well, we've been doing okay. We've been.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, most of us.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Most of it been. Been all right for the most part without. He's like, I. He literally said, I. I don't know how I could do it. I don't know how one could do it without chat GPT. I said, come on, man. Like, at some point we just got to ask, what are we doing here?

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, Luther Burden ran his 40 time and he was a 44 1.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, okay. I see. My first thought was, he's the fastest guy in the Bears.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's what I thought too.

[Co-host/Commentator]

But so I. And I. I'M going to, I'm going to go with that. Except sometimes Caleb looks faster. Is it Caleb? Because he keeps reaching 20 some miles an hour in his sprints too. And he was leading all the quarterbacks because he doesn't look like he's moving that fast, but he is moving that fast.

[Dan Bernstein]

Caleb's 40 time was 4, 5, 6.

[Co-host/Commentator]

All right.

I know it's, it's not DJ Moore because your 40 time was at your, the peak of your speed too. That a veteran player is going to.

[Dan Bernstein]

Be what Andrew Billings, 4, 9 6.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay, now this is my question. Andrew Billings was a 4, 9, 6.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Right after he left college. He was at Baylor. Right. And he was considered very, very quick and fast for a large man then. That was £100 ago. There is no way you may be a 5, 9, 6 now. He's probably a full second slower.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, I think he's still a sub 5. No. If he wanted to, he could get that weight.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Are you kidding?

[Dan Bernstein]

No, I think he could do.

[Co-host/Commentator]

There is not a chance Andrew Billings could run under sub 5. So I think he could.

[Dan Bernstein]

I'm going to put my money on big Bill.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Let me ask you this. There's a reason I was asking who's the fastest player on the Bears?

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Whoever it is, let's say it's burden. Could Burden outrace Andrew Billings if burden were pushing an empty wheelbarrow?

[Dan Bernstein]

No.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay, but, so, but it's hard to do. But like how heavy? Like if it's an aluminum wheelbarrow, a plastic wheelbarrow or obviously if it's a steel, like heavy duty.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, it has to be carry like a real deal. Like a real deal wheelbarrow. If we're going to do this race, it's got to be the real deal. I mean it can't be plastic or lightweight aluminum or whatever they make.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't know what they make wheelbarrows out of.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's got to be heavy. It's got to be heavy. It's got to have AI heavy wooden handles.

[Co-host/Commentator]

As long as the wheelbarrow is AI empowered. Because otherwise how would you know how to use a wheelbarrow? How would you have any idea how to use one without ChatGPT?

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, you could check chatgpt to ask.

[Co-host/Commentator]

How to use a wheelbarrow.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Go ahead and do it. Would you do that for me while we're doing that? Just see, I'm going to check with.

[Dan Bernstein]

My co pilot here.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't know how we ever used a wheelbarrow before without AI instructing us exactly how to optimize the use of a thing with a single wheel that helps us bring rocks from here. You had to move the rocks over there. And I would need to make sure that. I'm told by a thinking machine, thinking machine. Exactly how to do that. So you don't think so. Luther. By empty wheelbarrow. And then I would think we could. We could continually put stuff in it.

[Dan Bernstein]

So this is what Microsoft 365 Copilot tells me. Using a wheelbarrow is pretty straightforward once you know the basics. Here's a quick guide. Number one. Load it properly.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Load it properly.

[Dan Bernstein]

So place the wheelbarrow on a flat surface. It doesn't tip. Distribute the weight evenly. Keep heavier items towards the front, near the wheel for better balance.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Avoid overloading. Too much weight makes it hard to control damage.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The wheel.

[Dan Bernstein]

Number two. Lift correctly. Stand between the handles.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Wait, this screws me. My whole plan was to stand outside the left handle and only lift the left hand. No, damn it.

[Dan Bernstein]

Stand in between the handles. Bend your knees, not your back, and grip both handles firmly. Lift smoothly, using your legs, keeping your back straight so you lift the handles with your legs.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm already confused. I'm gonna need a full tutorial.

[Dan Bernstein]

So if I'm holding with my hands and lift it with my legs, am I on the ground holding it from underneath? That's weird. All right. Anyway, move safely.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like doing military presses with it.

[Dan Bernstein]

Push, don't pull.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, I'm so glad we did this.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh. Because that's might have been my issue. I've always had the wheel facing the opposite direction of that where I'm going. And I always pull it. That's why I have a problem. Because I don't see where I'm going.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, it makes it really hard.

[Dan Bernstein]

Once I fell down that hill, I had a wheelbarrow full of stuff.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Don't forget the giant comical flight of stairs.

[Dan Bernstein]

Should you take your wheelbarrow downstairs?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like, should you use it downstairs, down, maybe up? No.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Because you don't want. It might bounce. What does it say?

[Dan Bernstein]

So number three moves to the.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You can't make any decisions now without.

[Dan Bernstein]

Number four is dump the load. When you reach your destination, tip the wheelbarrow forward slowly. For heavy loads, you can lower the handles to the ground, then lift the back end to dump.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Why does it presume I want to dump the load?

[Dan Bernstein]

Pro tip. If you're moving soil or mulch, line the wheelbarrow with a tarp for easy cleanup.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay. This is a lot to comprehend. At this point. So Luther Burden has an empty wheelbarrow, and you say, ready, set, go. And Andrew Billings is in full pads.

[Dan Bernstein]

No. Why do you say no? Not full pads? He's not full pads.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Is Luther Burden full pads?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Whatever you want. They could be in shorts. And so I say, yeah, just shells. I know.

[Dan Bernstein]

No helmets. It's like a combine run.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I know. No, we get to dress them however we want. I want Andrew Billings in a big Hawaiian shirt, unbuttoned.

Speedo, and a ew.

[Dan Bernstein]

Or no, that's Theo Benedict.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Right. You'd put a speedo in Andrew. Brilliant. You'd never find it again.

It would just disappear.

[Dan Bernstein]

He would eat it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, it would just, like, get sucked into him, and you'd have to get it out with a giant forceps.

[Dan Bernstein]

All right, so I think bring the.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Andrew Billings speedo forceps again. Again. All right.

[Dan Bernstein]

If we're gonna do that, I think.

[Co-host/Commentator]

There'S five of them in here.

[Dan Bernstein]

I mean, if you're gonna try to embarrass him now with a Hawaiian shirt. And SPE needs to have something in the wheelbarrow.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Ben Johnson.

[Dan Bernstein]

Tyson Bagen.

So he has to push Tyson Bajan in a wheelbarrow while he races Andrew Billings. I think Andrew Billings wins.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Tyson Bagen's, like, been. Been up all night doing the homework of exactly how to be correct in the wheelbarrow. He's been repping it.

[Dan Bernstein]

But you line it with a tarp, though, for easy cleanup.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And then you. And then you have to dump the load somewhere right at the end of the race. That's too bad for Tyson Bagent.

[Dan Bernstein]

All right, I just checked here with our copilot on making a frozen pizza. It's giving us. Yeah, don't put it upside down with the cheese side down. So preheat the oven. Prepare the pizza. So they left a step out of here, though. You need to leave the pizza in the freezer until it's time to put.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It in the oven 100%.

[Dan Bernstein]

You cannot let it sit on the counter.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Correct. And I'm weird about that. Like, I have to. The oven's got to be, like, just finishing up, preheating. I hear that little click. Yeah. Once it ding, light goes off. Mine doesn't ding.

[Dan Bernstein]

Mine makes a noise. I was an alert.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Now mine doesn't. Mine.

[Dan Bernstein]

And then you take the pizza out of the freezer before you take all the packaging, why don't we load the.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Wheelbarrow with frozen pizza?

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, because an Andrew won't run.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay, you're right.

[Dan Bernstein]

You're Right.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Bad thought.

[Dan Bernstein]

They'll just push Luther over and take all the pizza.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Where'd Andrew go? I don't know. He was pushing a wheelbarrow full of pizza.

[Dan Bernstein]

I would too.

[Co-host/Commentator]

He's going down I41. He just passed 22.

[Dan Bernstein]

It says to use oven mitts to carefully remove the pizza.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You saw it happen to me. Speaking of, by the way, speaking of oven. Did you see this?

[Dan Bernstein]

What'd you do?

[Co-host/Commentator]

You see this is showing up on screen.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, that's a good. Is that a burn?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, it's a burn.

[Dan Bernstein]

Is that a blister?

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's a blister in the sun.

[Dan Bernstein]

Let me see. Oh, yeah, you can see it on camera.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You see that?

It was brutal.

[Dan Bernstein]

What'd you do? Was that pizza?

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, I was making home fries. Like.

Hash browns. I was doing my home version of the waffle house meal, which is really fucking good. Okay, so it's scattered.

[Dan Bernstein]

What are you doing? Hash browns.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Scattered, smothered, covered hash browns. But it's like oven roasted russet potatoes. Skin on with yellow onion, olive oil. You.

[Dan Bernstein]

And eggs and steak too.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Just wait.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay, sorry.

[Co-host/Commentator]

So first the key is get the. And I bake them 375 with a convection on and they get nice and crispy in the olive oil. The onions start to caramelize a little bit. And when they're done, I just turn it to low to keep it warm. I used. I had two of the thick Omaha steaks, filet mignon. I butterflied them and like finished out the butterfly. Cut it into like medallions almost.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And I made four of those. Half. So two whole filet mignons cut into four giant like filet mignon.

[Dan Bernstein]

What are we talking, like six ounce fillets that you.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Butterfly. I think they were that. So it's like 12 ounces of meat.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay, so you're doing three ounce medallions just seared.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Just. Just seared to rare to medium rare on the inside. Take them out of the pan. They sit and rest under foil. Same pan, nonstick. Wipe it out. Do three sunny side up eggs.

[Dan Bernstein]

Now the foil you use to cover the meat, do you take that off your head first?

[Co-host/Commentator]

The head foil's different because that's protected. So you leave that on from cosmic rays. Yes, and cosmic ray. He lives in the front. He comes over every once in a while. How you doing? Hey, man.

So, yeah, that's resting. The potatoes are done. I put the potatoes in a giant bowl. The whole thing. It's two whole potatoes and a whole onion.

That goes into a big Bowl. Then a handful of shredded sharp cheddar cheese. I put the three eggs on top.

[Dan Bernstein]

How'd you cook the eggs?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Sunny side up.

[Dan Bernstein]

Sunny side up.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay. Just take directly out of the pan, big three egg blop right on top of that.

[Clark Lea]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Cut around the yolks. I take the egg white out. I put that on the steak plate.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I smash in the egg yolks and. And the cheese into the hash brown, just like I do at Waffle House.

[Dan Bernstein]

All right.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Then I cover. I don't care how good a steak it is, because it's the Waffle House thing. A1.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, you have to.

[Co-host/Commentator]

A1 on the steaks. And then I. I will heavily salt the egg white. Eat the egg white first, just as that sort of lube the tubes a little bit.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And then. And then. Then you're set. Then you're good.

[Dan Bernstein]

You're good to go. That sounds great. So how'd you burn yourself?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Reached in to get the potatoes.

[Clark Lea]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The oven mitt. I did not know the insulation in the thumb had moved, shifted, deteriorated as I grabbed the pan by the edge. It's like I wasn't wearing an oven mitt because. And there was nothing on the outside that would tell me that the outside was absolutely different. Well, not. No, not until I grabbed the hot pan.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, yeah, obviously something went wrong with the insulation, and I. And I fried my thumb and.

[Dan Bernstein]

Do you have this, like, regular kitchen oven mitts? You know, like a regular.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay, it sounds like one of those silly of gloves or anything, so. But yeah, that's what I have.

[Dan Bernstein]

I have a. I have a. I have a glove that I bought for when I got my smoker.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Some of those are bad. Some of those don't.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, no, this is great.

[Co-host/Commentator]

So I. I just immediately threw that oven out. Immediately.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I would hope so.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And I'm glad it happened to me and not Jason or Zoe or Beth. Yeah, well, Jason wouldn't care. He'd be too. You know, he wouldn't notice. He'd bang himself in the head with the pan a bunch of times too. No, so. But I was. It was terrifying. Like, what the hell? Because I thought, I'm good.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, copilot says touching hot pans without protection can cause severe burns instantly.

[Co-host/Commentator]

See, if I. If I had AI to tell me to not grab a hot pan, I would have been fine. Who's. Are we sure Luther Burden is the fastest player on the Bears? I don't know.

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Why.

[Dan Bernstein]

Why am I having a hard time fighting 40 times, I don't know.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You're the producer. You're supposed to be good at all that stuff.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's not working.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't know. You know all that stuff. If you are a last minute holiday shopper, you know that feeling. You put it off. You put it off and then you go in and then shelves are empty and you click around and the sizes of everything that you want are all gone and ideas are running low. I got something for you. Aura Frames is the solution. It is a gift that feels personal and can handle your last minute shopping needs. Especially if it's somebody for whom you struggle to shop. The Aura Frame is a digital photographic frame to which you can upload unlimited photos and video. You download a very simple app, you connect to WI Fi and then you have this beautiful frame that is constantly showing whatever pictures you want in perfect digital clarity. You can preload photos before it ships and keep adding from anywhere, anytime. You can personalize it with a message before it arrives. And you can share photos and videos straight from your phone all year long. It includes a gift box. Every frame comes packaged in a premium gift box with no price tag. And obviously this idea of family and togetherness. You can't wrap it, but you can frame it for a limited time. You can save on this perfect gift by visiting Aura Frames. It's a U R A frames.com to get $35 off Aura's best selling Carver mat frames named number one by Wirecutter by using the promo code DBU at checkout. That's a U R A Frames promo code dbu. This deal is exclusive to you, the listener and frames sell out fast, so order yours now to get it in time for the holidays. Support the show by mentioning us at.

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[Co-host/Commentator]

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[Dan Bernstein]

What are you learning?

[Co-host/Commentator]

What are you discovering?

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I'm reading about Andrew Billings on my co pilot here. He says at 30 years old, weighing around 340 with no recent performance data, expecting him to run a sub 5 is unlikely.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, he's also not 340.

[Dan Bernstein]

If you're curious about his current speed. He'd need to be timed. So yeah, we need to do, we need to get this done. I think he can do a sub 540 still.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We need to ask him. Can you, can we get him on?

[Dan Bernstein]

I'll try to get him on.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Let's just hang out with Big Bill for a while and just talk about a bunch of stuff because I remember one of my favorite interviews that you remember. The Bears remember Aaron Gibson?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes, I do.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I think you booked that interview.

[Dan Bernstein]

I did.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Aaron Gibson I think was officially four spins.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes, I, yeah, I think that's maybe bigger.

[Co-host/Commentator]

At one point did he hit 450 because lucky he.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I'm going to get, I want to get Big Bill on and I want to get Nishan on also.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Aaron Gibson.

[Dan Bernstein]

Let's try those.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Aaron Gibson was listed at 66370.

And he still holds the record as the heaviest NFL player ever. He was. He was 350 pounds in high school, and I want to say he hit 450 at some point, but we asked him what his, like, most dangerous pig out food was. Remember what he said?

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't.

[Co-host/Commentator]

His. His wife at the time. This is still. I. He said his wife was Czechoslovakian, which I know she's. Which means she's either Czech or Slovak, which would.

[Dan Bernstein]

How'd you figure that out? It's pretty good, man.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm just saying the country's name. He said Czechoslovakian, but we. We didn't. Or I didn't drill down to the point and ask whether Czech or Slovak. He said she.

[Dan Bernstein]

Why are you so mad? It was because you're being fair.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Question.

[Dan Bernstein]

I want to know how you deduced that on your own.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Stop being a dick.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You have so much fun. God.

[Dan Bernstein]

What?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Nothing.

[Dan Bernstein]

I have so much. What?

[Co-host/Commentator]

What?

[Dan Bernstein]

Say it. What do I have so much what?

[Co-host/Commentator]

You say something and then you wait to see how long it takes me to realize that you're messing with me.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Am I right?

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, I don't do that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Penis. So he said she makes lasagna. And he would eat an entire.

[Dan Bernstein]

Is it Czechoslovakian lasagna?

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's either Czech or Slovak lasagna. I assume it's Italian lasagna. And he would eat an entire pan. Like a full hotel pan or like a meal? Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

Not a hotel pan. Seriously?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's big. He's.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Boy. He's the heaviest NFL player of all time. You don't think he'd eat a whole lasagna? Like a whole commercial sized lasagna?

[Dan Bernstein]

What's the. What's the biggest thing you've eaten, like, in one sitting?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, I've done the slinger at Diner Grill on Irving Park.

[Dan Bernstein]

Which is.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The slinger is. I think it's four orders of hash browns with onions. No, I didn't get it with onions. 4 hash browns covered with 4 orders of hash browns.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Covered with chili.

That is covered with two cheeseburger patties.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Covered with two eggs.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, that's. I mean, that's a lot of food, but yeah, you could take that down.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I did.

[Dan Bernstein]

What's the most number of sliders you've ever eaten? One sitting 12. Okay. What about. What about Taco Bell? Like, hard shell tacos?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Also 12.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And then, like I say, recently, I did a full eight piece of Popeyes.

Is that a whole bird? Whole bird.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I did a whole bird and a large mashed potatoes.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, that's the one thing that I have difficulty being around you when you eat chicken.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Chicken on a bone. I just don't.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You don't want to be anywhere near that.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, it's good. It's uncomfortable.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. I kind of get feral.

[Dan Bernstein]

You do? Yeah. You are a wild animal.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I go back to, like, some kind.

[Dan Bernstein]

Of Adam something man. Like, did you have childhood trauma where someone stole chicken while you were eating it, like, in the middle of a meal?

[Co-host/Commentator]

I did have food possessiveness issues as a kid.

[Dan Bernstein]

Why? Because it was just you and your sister growing up.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, but it was written in, like, my parent letters from camp that I was very possessive about food. And I don't know. Was it a breastfeeding issue? Maybe. I don't. Like. There's probably a reason for it. There's probably some actual.

[Dan Bernstein]

You weren't breastfeeding at camp, were you?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, you know, I had attachment issues. It wasn't my mother.

[Dan Bernstein]

It was one of the camp counselors.

[Co-host/Commentator]

His name is Jim. It was just, you know, whatever you had. But no, I don't know why, but I was always very. And the other thing was that where my mom always had, like, rare roast beef around.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Because I heavily salted rare roast beef.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Would be something from a very, very young age that I would, like, kind of crave or was like a satisfying.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like, for sandwiches and stuff.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, just, like, would sit in.

[Dan Bernstein]

She'd make it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, she would get it from the deli. But it's like anytime she had to shut me up or something, she would treat me like a dog and, like, throw me, like, rare roast beef.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh. So it was either rare roast beef or those caramels that would make you talk for hours.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, Fanny. That was in Deerbrook Mall. Yeah, it was the Fannie Mae Vanilla Caramel.

[Dan Bernstein]

Here's a beef and a bag of candy. Shut the hell up, K. Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, kissing. Talking non stop. Sorry. She can give me.

[Dan Bernstein]

She didn't make you start smoking.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I was just saying.

[Dan Bernstein]

Try one of these.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Just hand her. Hand it back.

[Dan Bernstein]

Here. Here's a lighter and a smoke.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Take a drag on this. Shut up. Rather hear you cough than talk.

Kudos to the Vanderbilt head coach, by the way.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, my God, by the way.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We never came to a conclusion on what could Luther Burden pushing a wheelbarrow with Tyson Bajan in it outrun Andrew Billings?

[Dan Bernstein]

I would say no on that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We're going to leave that an open question. Could. But I think with an empty wheelbarrow, he could outrun Andrew Billings as long as it's not a crazy, heavy wheelbarrow.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, I think like a regular wheelbarrow. Like just a metal one with wood handles. Big rubber wheel. Yeah. I'd like to see that race.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

All right. I'm going to work on getting Billings on the show.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yes, I want to. We should just hang out with Billings.

[Dan Bernstein]

I think. I think he could run a sub 540 today.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I think you are 100% wrong.

[Dan Bernstein]

We'll see what he says about it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, I don't care what he says. He's wrong, too. If he says he could run another sub 5 40.

[Dan Bernstein]

Even if he says he couldn't, I'm still going to disagree with him and say that he could. I believe in big Andrew Billings. I believe in his speed. I believe in his heart.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I miss that man. Yeah, we should.

[Dan Bernstein]

I would never quit him.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We should have him around your guy. You're the Vanderbilt head coach, by the way. I love this dude.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I do, too.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Clark Lee Lea.

This is how you respond. This here is how you can respond. This is just an option. Now, when you don't make the playoff, when you don't make the College Football Playoff, you can do what Notre Dame is doing, which is going on the A World Victim tour.

[Dan Bernstein]

One of the. One of the biggest.

[Co-host/Commentator]

A world tour of crying. What was us. What was us? Everybody's against us. We've been railroaded. We deserve better because we are who we are. As an alternate possibility, you can do what the Vanderbilt head coach is doing.

[Clark Lea]

You know, we happen to be on the wrong side of that in this. In this moment. But look, that's no one's fault except for our own. You know, we had our opportunities and we didn't do enough. And so that. That's the. You know, we. We are not victims in this process.

[Dan Bernstein]

We're.

[Clark Lea]

Our ownership is in. Is in. Coming up short. I think it. It's a reminder of how critical every moment is, every snap, every possession. And there's a lot to learn in this season because we want to be back in these moments. But as it is, you know, we'll. We'll spend time in the off season trying to. Trying to get the system more into focus with where the game has gone. In the meantime, we're gonna. We're gonna celebrate the hell out of going and playing in Tampa and having.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Some fun together one last time.

[Dan Bernstein]

Is he. Is there a court reporter there?

[Co-host/Commentator]

He's stenographer.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't know, but someone's gonna say, yeah, but Vanderbilt was on the outside the whole time. When the TV shows started and they were putting out all of the rankings, they knew that they were on the outside. It was easier for them to deal with. Notre Dame was shocked when they saw it, so.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, but here's the thing. You didn't. I mean, Notre Dame didn't beat anyone that was higher than a 15 seed. So they, they, yeah, they, they lost their first two games of the season.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, I'm not even going to beat.

[Dan Bernstein]

Ranked teams 20th and lower.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm not going to relitigate it. It just.

[Dan Bernstein]

And then half their season, though, they spent six games against teams that finished nine and 40 combined. I mean, come on. It was a garbage schedule, but either way.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And so what. How hard is it to just do what. What he's doing?

[Dan Bernstein]

Because they're, they're entitled.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We didn't win enough games.

[Dan Bernstein]

They're. It's, it's an entitled program and it goes back to when they weren't even good and they were on NBC every week and you had to, you had to suffer through a Notre Dame football game, even. They were garbage because people love Notre Dame. But you know what? You weren't good enough to make the College Football Playoff. Sorry. So be a baby about it. Fine. I'm not going to play a bowl game. So Clark Lee was asked about that as well, too. We just learned Notre Dame declined their bowl. Was there any thought to that going on here?

[Clark Lea]

No. I mean, I, I can't speak to their process, but we love playing football here and to realize that we get a chance to close out a special season with a special group of players on a great bowl stage in a great city against a really, really tough opponent. I mean, as a football fan, as a football coach, as a football person, there's just. It's hard not to get excited about that. So there was no way that we were gonna end this story early. And I'm so excited to be taking this team down to Tampa and I got a chance to spend I think like 20, 23 days or so with them. You know, we're going to soak up every one of those days, so. Looking forward to that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

So they play December 31st at the ReliaQuest Bowl.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Against Iowa.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay. Yeah. Great. And I, trust me, I know the non playoff bowl system is dying. I know that that's pretty much over. It's going to be really hard. And even Vanderbilt in the future is probably just me. Look, we don't. Our players are all transferring or the players we have coming in for next year aren't here yet.

[Dan Bernstein]

See, I don't, I don't agree with you on that. I don't feel that way. I don't, I don't think that way. I think it's, it's still going to be a thing. You're going to have programs like this, that, that are doing things like this is the first 10 win season ever for Vanderbilt. I mean, this is, you know, they have, they have a quarterback who's going to, he's a, he's a Heisman finalist. You know, you get seasons like that. You don't want to just let it just drift away. And if the kids want to play, they should play.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Exactly. And the kids who don't want to play shouldn't have to.

[Dan Bernstein]

Fine.

[Co-host/Commentator]

As long as that. There's that rule. And the team like, look, I'm going to the NFL or I'm transferring and I don't want to tear my ACL before I transfer.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Because I got all this nil money coming.

[Dan Bernstein]

We've talked about this. We've talked about the number of high school athletes that go on to play ncaa, you know, sports, and how it gets less and less than the kids from, you know, Division one that go play college football. I get it. You have the big programs that are going to send, you know, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12 kids to the, to the, to the NFL. Not all colleges are like that. And for a lot of seniors, this is their final time to play football.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Then they should be able to play. But what I'm saying is, as long as it's. There's no stigma against the guys who are transferring for nil money or transferring to transfer, whatever reason, they shouldn't feel that they have to play. It's. Everybody can make their own decision and every decision is fine.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I'm fine with that. I'm totally fine with that. And whatever consequences come because of that, I hope you're ready to live with them.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. No, it's, it would be the worst thing if someone say, hey, I'll give you a million dollars to transfer. Awesome. I'm in.

[Dan Bernstein]

And then you need to skip that bowl game. Or I'm not going to play that bowl game.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. Or force is a difficult decision.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And say, look, these are my friends, my teammates, all the stuff I could launch into a Francisco Mendoza post game.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, my God.

[Co-host/Commentator]

My brothers and I. It would be fun.

[Dan Bernstein]

He's great, man.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Apparently he does it all the time.

[Dan Bernstein]

He's a lunatic. I love it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like, we had that one. He did it when he was with Cal the same thing?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, exact same thing.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We draw the length of the field. It's my brothers.

[Fernando Mendoza]

And we all got his grandmother.

[Dan Bernstein]

He turns into a different person when he's being interviewed.

[Co-host/Commentator]

A fugue state of some kind. His eyes roll back in his head and he's speaking in football tongues. The Big Ten champs.

[Advertisement Voice]

How does that sound?

[Fernando Mendoza]

It sounds so beautiful. I want to give all the glory to God. We were never supposed to be in this position. But by the glory of God, the great coaches, great teammates.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like the audio sped up, we were.

[Fernando Mendoza]

Able to pull this off. Whoever thought the hoor would be here, but now the hooers are flipping champs. Let's go.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You guys call yourself a bunch of misfits who found the right home at Indiana? Why was this the right place for this group?

[Fernando Mendoza]

It's the right place for process oranges. We're going day by day, whether the offensive line, the defense, the coaches, special teams. We're all process oriented to one goal. That's our thing, is we're brothers. We can drag teams into the deep end because we know that we're going to stick together. And we're the strongest glue ever.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Drag teams to the defend, drown them well, that's. We're going to stick together.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It must be a Kurt Signetti thing. Yeah, you can tell that sounds like a coach thing or dragon.

[Dan Bernstein]

Definitely a coach thing.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. They can stay us with a deep end because we're crocodile or whatever he says.

[Clark Lea]

I don't know.

[Co-host/Commentator]

But he did that before.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, he did it at Cal. Yeah, I saw that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

He was just like, oh. We were to drive the length of the field still. Bruce Weber in him.

[Fernando Mendoza]

He got an angle on him.

[Co-host/Commentator]

He gets Bruce, he sounds like he wins a game. He turns into Bruce Weber. That's funny how you're driving the lane really well. The game we had him going off the pick and roll angle.

Okay. Knock yourself out, man. So he's going to, you know he'll be at the Heisman ceremony. We know he's on the deus now. We know the four finalists are. And I hope we get to hear from him.

[Dan Bernstein]

I hope he wins. I really do.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I hope.

[Dan Bernstein]

But he's got to get just to get that going. Yeah, I hope he does.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I can't wait to be in those commercials and be the Heisman winner. And in the car, the horses driving the car.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I was looking at field Yates on ESPN dropped his first. His first draft.

[Co-host/Commentator]

His first draft prediction mock draft.

[Dan Bernstein]

Thank you. And he has Mendoza going number one overall. Yeah, he has the jets moving up to trade with the Giants and taking Mendoza.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I never, I'll never laugh at a crazy quarterback thing. Quarterbacks always rise, even when it's a bad quarterback draft.

[Dan Bernstein]

Let me make sure I spoke the truth there of field Yates. Yeah. Projected pick, New York jets move up in a trade with the Giants and they take Fernando Mendoza and he has Dante Moore going to, to the Raiders.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay, that'll be a very interesting discussion if Those guys go 1, 2. Because Dante Moore is like the ideal.

[Dan Bernstein]

Ideal pro guy right now. Right.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Athletic profile.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Whether or not he can really play NFL quarterback, I don't know. But it's a really interesting question about somebody who is more ready to play the right now and somebody who could grow into the one of these like super dudes at the position.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. So Mendoza though. And we can, we can talk about this later on Ford Progress with our, with our guy Matt Miller who's going to join us every Wednesday throughout the rest of the football season here on core Progress.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That is so cool.

[Dan Bernstein]

So Fernando Mendoza, he has the skill set, he has the body to be a pro quarterback. What is. He seems like a real sweet kid. I mean he really does. He really seems like a really nice, sweet, sweet kid. What does he do in New York like with that media?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Maybe he just charms the pants.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, maybe. I hope so because he really seems like a nice dude.

[Co-host/Commentator]

So is Justin Fields.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, Justin Fields. I love Justin Fields.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Great guy. So look, if he can handle it, his problem is just he's not good enough at quarterback.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, it's tough.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It is. It's really hard. I want to let you know about the best sale yet, your best chance yet to get that fabulous big box of meat from Omaha Steaks. And maybe more importantly, give it as a gift because this is now the sizzle all the way sale. 50% off site wide@omaha steaks.com 5 0. Have you seen what beef prices are doing?

[Dan Bernstein]

It's everything. Well, everything's expensive. Beef's insane. Five zero is that you said fifty five zero.

[Co-host/Commentator]

50% off site wide@omaha steaks.com that's awesome. And $35 off with the promo code Bernstein. Orders placed by five o' clock Chicago time in the afternoon. Ship same day. It's Omaha Steaks. Unrivaled quality and variety. Every bite backed by a 100% guarantee. Every steak is perfectly aged to maximize tenderness. Hand cut by master butchers in America's heartland. Grass fed grain finished beef Save gourmet gifts and more holiday favorites with Omaha Steaks. Right now, visit omaha steaks for 50% off sitewide during the sizzle all the way sale for an extra $35 off use promo code Bernstein. Just my last name at checkout. Terms apply. See site for details. That's Omaha steaks.com code Bernstein. You know what else is hard is finding the right gift. And sometimes this time of year, I remind you and you're damn it, Bernstein, why did you remind me? Because I've got this list and I haven't gotten and I've been procrastinating and I still want to come up with something. Well, I've got it for you. And it's an aura frame. The aura frame. I say, oh, big deal. It's a picture frame. No, it's not just a picture frame. It is a digital frame that allows you to upload the photos. You can preload the photos before it ships to personalize exactly what is up there in perfect digital quality. And you can do it with a single photo. You could do it where it's repeating any number of photos. It's great for the grandparents and pictures of the grandkids. Or maybe you have somebody with a beloved pet and you have pictures of the pets. Who knows? Whatever you want to do, the aura frame is perfect for you, especially right now as we're just a couple of weeks away. The aura frame has unlimited free photos and video. Once you have the app, you connect it to wifi and you can preload. As I mentioned, keep adding from anywhere, anytime you can add a message before it arrives and you can all year long you can keep sharing photos and videos. This comes in a gift box that's included. There's no price tag on there. You can't wrap togetherness, but you can frame it. So for a limited time, save on the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com to get $35 off Aura's best selling Carver mat frames. These were named number one by wirecutter using the promo code DBU at checkout. Maybe you've seen an aura frame before. Maybe you've been at somebody's house or you've been in an office. Like, oh, look at that. That's really cool. Well, yes, it is really cool. Auraframes.com, promo code DBU. It's exclusive because you're listening to this show that code frames sell out fast. Order yours now to get it in time for the holidays. Support the show. You can mention this at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. Again, it is aura frames.

Promo code dbu.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I'm telling you too, it's, it's really a great product. I love, I love ours at home. We're loading it with Christmas pictures right now and it just, it filters through and it's great to see the kids from real young to where they are now. It's a great gift idea for someone maybe that doesn't live near you and you're sending them something or if you're going to a Christmas party and you're bringing a gift or it's a gift exchange where you do nice gifts and not like, you know, the white elephant gifts. This is a great idea. It really is. And whoever, whoever gets this is going to love it. I promise you that. It's really cool.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I had no idea that my wife was in a gift exchange. So on the Tulane parent page, she got involved in a gift exchange and ours came yesterday.

[Dan Bernstein]

What was it? Was it like a giant, like a hurricane? Like a pre made.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's really cool.

[Dan Bernstein]

What is it?

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's a cutting board that has the Tulane angry wave on it on both sides.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And then our last name in cursive underneath.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, that's very neat.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. And that's custom product. That's something I'll use.

[Dan Bernstein]

Unless they found it at a store. That'd be crazy. The coincidence of finding a two lane cutting board with Bernstein on it, it's amazing.

[Co-host/Commentator]

My name is also Bort.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like what do I need to get these people? Where can I go and oh my.

[Co-host/Commentator]

God, what are the odds?

[Dan Bernstein]

That's crazy.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Hey, real quick before you move on, I just. We haven't talked about the college football, the playoff bracket as far as the games.

Just mentioned those. Real fast. James Madison in Oregon is the 512 game. Oregon's big favorite there. The winner of that gets Texas Tech, Alabama and Oklahoma. Winner there gets Indiana, tulane. Your school 17 and a half. My school underdogs. It's Jason's school.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's a school that has all my money.

[Dan Bernstein]

Tulane and Ole Miss, they played Georgia. Winner gets Georgia, Miami and Texas A and M. The 10:17 game gets Ohio State. Now one thing I don't like, and even though I've never been a huge college football guy, again, this is the most college football I've watched this past. This season is more than I've ever watched my life.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Why?

[Dan Bernstein]

I just never had a reason to watch. I never wanted to. And you know, I wasn't affiliated with a school that had a football program, so I just, I never did. And then it was. I watched any given Saturday, the SEC documentary on Netflix. That's when I watched before the season began, and that's when I first saw Diego Pavia. That's where it all started.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Did you see Roel and Javier?

[Dan Bernstein]

I did not. They were not featured on this documentary. This was about football.

And then I saw bits from Clark Lee and then I started to look into Clark Lee a little bit, and then the Diego Pavia. Then I'm like, you know what? I'm going to check out this Vanderbilt kid.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

And that's how the Vanderbilt love this season started. So it all started that documentary. But what. So what I always enjoyed, even as a really non big college football fan, was I enjoyed watching the Rose bowl regardless of who played. I enjoyed the parade. I enjoyed the game. It just. It felt like. It felt like the holidays watching the Rose Bowl. It was something special.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It was later in the afternoon.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

And I just. I don't like now and I don't. I don't know why and I can't. I can't figure out my brain why. I just don't like that it's affiliated now in the college football playoffs format like you have. I don't know. Yeah, like the Orange Bowl. Like that they're. That they're not exclusive in something special anymore. That they're just part of this big money monster.

[Co-host/Commentator]

They always were.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I know they were. But it just. It didn't feel as slimy maybe. I don't know.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I thought it was. I think that it was slimier when these individual bowls had all of these. These creepy dudes with their lapel pins wandering around press boxes, acting all important. It always used to bug me, like when I was a student, like the boosters.

[Dan Bernstein]

You mean like those guys are the bowl officials? Oh, the bowl officials. Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

When. When I was at Duke and covering the Steve Spurrier teams and Duke was in play for these Bulls, I would go up to the press box when I was working as a, you know, student journalist or play by play guy, and they were everywhere. It was like the Peach bowl guys would come in in their peach jackets and they were.

[Dan Bernstein]

They all looked like made out of peaches.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, but they were all the color. Look at these losers.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like you.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like, if we're here to decide if you're good, come to our bowl game because we're the Peach bowl committee. Like, what the hell are you.

[Dan Bernstein]

They were also in wizard of Oz.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We represent the Beach Bowl Committee. Get out of here.

[Dan Bernstein]

So the Orange bowl is the. The Texas Tech and the winner of the James Madison Oregon. You have the Rose bowl is Indiana and Alabama. Oklahoma. Georgia is the Sugar Bowl. That's Georgia. And the winner of Tulane. Ole.

[Co-host/Commentator]

So that's why Tulane really wants. Think about this. If they beat Ole miss, they lost 45 to 10 the first time they met. So they have played them before. If.

[Dan Bernstein]

Wait, not this year.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, they played them.

[Dan Bernstein]

They played. Oh, did they really?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, yeah, they did. That's when Chambliss was just taking over as ole Ms. Quarterback.

[Dan Bernstein]

45 to 10.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Clark Lea]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, it was not great. Not great. But, you know, who knows? Maybe it's a game. Their next game would be in New Orleans.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, would it really?

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's the Sugar Bowl.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, the Sugar bowl there.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Their next game.

[Dan Bernstein]

So they would. If they were to beat Ole Miss, they would play Georgia at home.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Not in their home stadium. Not in Yeoman.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right. But. But in New Orleans in the Superdome. Yeah. Well, that could be a really big upset over number three, Georgia.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That would be 100 to nothing.

And then that could literally be 100 to nothing.

[Dan Bernstein]

The Cotton bowl is Ohio State. And then the winner of Miami A and M. And then Ohio State and Georgia would play in the Fiesta Bowl. Indiana, Texas Tech would play in the Peach Bowl. And then your championship game is January 19th. So. So far away.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's a long time from now, isn't it?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like, we're around then, you know, we get close to. That's. That's, like the early sign of spring. That's when we. When is the. The Pebble Beach Pro Am?

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't. That's early sign of spring.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah. To me, the Pebble Beach Pro Am means spring is here.

Because, you know, the lights already changing. We're a week away.

[Dan Bernstein]

Or that's January 30th to February 2nd.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay, that's spring.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, that was last year's.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Then what's this year's. Damn it. You got the paper there? Damn it.

[Dan Bernstein]

Damn. This machine is not working.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, your AI sucks.

[Dan Bernstein]

Machine is bad.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, you need AI to think for you.

[Dan Bernstein]

The 2026 Pebble Beach Pro Am, February 25th through the 28th.

[Co-host/Commentator]

What?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, that's late.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's way too late.

[Dan Bernstein]

So it's not even close to January 19th.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, you were totally wrong on that one.

[Co-host/Commentator]

But it's too late. Yeah, I don't want that now. It's.

[Dan Bernstein]

And that's not the first sign of spring. You're high. January 19th is the first sign of spring. First line of spring is like March or June.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. Look, weather here sucks. I hate Chicago.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I Will be fishing.

[Dan Bernstein]

I hate bear weather.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, all that matters is how long. I could extend the fishing season.

[Dan Bernstein]

But you don't ice fish, though. I mean, fingers crossed, we could hope. You start.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Why?

[Dan Bernstein]

No reason.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Just in case I fall in.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, I wouldn't want that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, I don't.

[Dan Bernstein]

Why would you even say that?

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't like ice fishing. Well, you shouldn't. It's cold. It's insane. I don't. Well, it's not. But if it's not cold, you're in one of these. You're basically in a sports bar on the ice. Have you seen these? Serious.

[Dan Bernstein]

I haven't seen, like, real serious. I've always seen, like, the really small ones that look like someone lives in it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, no, no.

[Dan Bernstein]

These.

[Co-host/Commentator]

These are. It's like the size of your garage. There's televisions. It's 72 degrees in there. You're sitting in a barca lounger and you've got.

[Dan Bernstein]

They've got wet bars. A business.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, these are the regular ice fishermen have their own ice fishing shacks that are tricked out. It's a man cave. And you happen to have a hole in front of you and there's fish underneath. And then they put these. They drop the camera down there.

[Dan Bernstein]

How do you make your garage 72 degrees? How do you make it 72 degrees if you're ice fishing With a heater? But doesn't that melt the ice?

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, it's not gonna melt 10 inches ice or 6 inches.

[Dan Bernstein]

Won't it melt like a top layer or make it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, but it won't melt the safe ice. It won't make the ice unsafe. All right.

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know. It doesn't sound smart. Like a big bonfire in the middle.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You basically essentially, electric heaters. They got a generator, they got television, they're watching all the games, and then they're sitting in the lounge watching games. It's like, oh, the tip up goes. And, oh, I got a pike or I got a perch.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I'm sure there's old school, old head guys hearing that. That kind of sportsmanship pisses them off. Like, that's not the whole point of it. It's not to be comfortable and to have a TV and a generator.

[Co-host/Commentator]

For me, fishing is kinetic. You gotta move, you gotta be out. You gotta move. You gotta be finding the fish. Fish. And not just sitting there.

[Dan Bernstein]

See, for me, fishing is going to the fishmonger at my favorite store and, like, just getting a fillet.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's what you like doing that too?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I like Doing that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It's probably.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's how I fish.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And probably healthier for you because believe it or not, some of. A lot of the wild caught fish. Even though you think it's good for you, it's got like microplastics in it and some of that stuff. You're better off.

[Dan Bernstein]

I went fishing the other day and they didn't have any halibut, so I didn't get anything. I was looking for halibut.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, you. That's expensive. And they're fun to catch too.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, I just. Yeah, they're. They're easy to get catch at the store.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, but you don't have to shoot them at the store.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, at the store you don't have to do anything except order the big ones.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You gotta get a. You gotta shoot them in the head before you get them in the boat. Yeah, otherwise I'll wreck your boat. And your rectum.

[Dan Bernstein]

They will.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You've gotta. You gotta shoot them right in the head kind of boat.

[Dan Bernstein]

Are you fishing in that? A halibut ruined your boat.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Have you ever seen what a 300 pound. It's like the size of Andrew Billings? Some of these things. Okay, could you. Did Andrew Billings win a race in.

[Dan Bernstein]

A 40 yard dash against a fish?

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, against Luther Burden carrying a fish?

[Dan Bernstein]

No, a 300 pound fish?

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, a decent sized halibut.

[Dan Bernstein]

What's a decent size? Like, what are you talking, £70? 50.

[Co-host/Commentator]

£50. Let's say he's carrying. Luther Burden's running, carrying a 50 pound halibut.

[Dan Bernstein]

Dead.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Luther Burton is alive. His halibut's dead.

[Dan Bernstein]

Is it prepared and cooked or no. Or is it just. Okay, because I would say Luther just. Bill would stop.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, just a regular. Oh, he'd stop and eat it.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. I put my money on Billings.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's hard to run holding a 50.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Pound fish, but a halibut specifically is a hard fish to carry because of it.

[Dan Bernstein]

But for Luther's safety, it's dead.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You'd have to either do it like this or I'd probably. You'd want to probably get your like thumb in the gills and have it over your shoulder.

[Dan Bernstein]

I'll be politically correct. But for Luther's safety, the fish is unalive. Right? Right.

[Co-host/Commentator]

It is deceased. It is no more.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's unalive.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Correct. The fish is pining for the depths.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, it was at one point, until you yanked it out, it was going about its day, minding its own business. And then you pull it out of.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The water, shoot it in the Head and then you get it on the boat.

[Dan Bernstein]

I didn't know you had to shoot those in the head.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The big ones you do the big ones, you have to. Otherwise it'll.

[Dan Bernstein]

So it would wreck your boat, though. Yeah, like how it'll break it, Drive it away or what?

[Co-host/Commentator]

So long, suckers.

[Dan Bernstein]

Push the fisherman in the water and drive away with your boat.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, just by flopping, it can break the deck.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, it sounds like a pretty shitty boat to me.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Fine.

[Dan Bernstein]

You might need a better boat and a bigger one, too.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You might need windows.

[Dan Bernstein]

Don't be all heavy like that, like you're exasperated.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm too good for this silly talk, right? Jag off.

[Dan Bernstein]

I want to get back to being an adult here and work. Whatever.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Russ Armstrong is waiting for your call. Because Russ Armstrong is the owner of Chicago Window guys. And if you need windows, don't mess around with all the silly stuff that you hear about. Buy one, get one free. All those sales gimmicks. Buy one, get one 50% off or all that two for ones. Russ will explain to you why that isn't what you think it is. And then he will give you the best product with the best price guaranteed. He's got a price match guarantee. The really cool thing too is he knows all the people that are going to be in and around your house. And if you ask any of these other window companies is installing my windows, they won't know because they use subcontracted labor.

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Whoever shows up to put them in will put them in. Russ will tell you the names of the people coming to your house to do it. Call them. 847-302-9171. He's got all his five star reviews for you to look at at ChicagoNowdownGuys.com and I always say that I've recommended Russ to friends, neighbors, co workers. The co worker streak continues. Our guy, our main Meng.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, yeah.

He'S got Russ coming up.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Our guy, our engineer, said, oh, yeah, I need to end up talking to Russ. Why didn't you tell me? He's like, well, I don't know. I didn't know I needed to tell you. I was just listening to the pod and heard about it. Okay, great. So. 847-302-9171. If you need windows, don't wait. Get yourself some windows. Because Russ has the best stuff. His factory is right here in Chicago. Everything is custom made for you and for your home. 847-302-9171. Hey. A rare moment of happiness. In the world of the Chicago White Sox, they won the baseball draft lottery.

[Dan Bernstein]

Congratulations.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Harold Baines was Good luck. And Harold Baines, in 1977 was their last number one overall pick.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, and I saw that the. Some shortstop from ucla. I saw his name. Yeah, Rock Chalowski.

[Co-host/Commentator]

His name is Daniel Rock. R O, C H. Is his actual middle name. It's not a nickname. Is. His middle name is Rock, but he.

[Dan Bernstein]

Sounds like a South side guy.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Chalowski.

[Dan Bernstein]

Rock Chalowski.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't know about this Chalowski guy.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, well, no, hey, never a bad move. Draft the shortstop.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Always draft short. Always draft shortstops and center fielders because you can play them anywhere. And then you'll. If it's a major league bat and a major league glove, you'll figure out where it goes later. So do not worry about that. I don't know anything about him. I know his resume is really good.

[Dan Bernstein]

Looks good.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, it looks basebally.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, Sounds basebally.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Looks. Sounds baseball.

[Dan Bernstein]

Southside baseball, Chalowski.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, who does. Who does Bob want? Who does Pope Bob want? You got to know. You can't really. Because he's out there talking to people and he's got stuff to say about everything. Opinions.

[Dan Bernstein]

I mean, do you think it's any coincidence that they got the number one pick in the draft? No. Now that ace.

[Co-host/Commentator]

God, Bob, lottery's tomorrow. Okay. Bad. Yep.

[Dan Bernstein]

You think the secretary is like, hey, Bob's on the line again. Bob from. Bob from where?

[Co-host/Commentator]

From the 815. Yep, we found that out.

[Dan Bernstein]

Hey, God, Bob from 815 is on the line.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And by the way, that is true. I. He is a. I've seen.

[Dan Bernstein]

He's a. Bob of the 815.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I have seen a screenshot of the. Of somebody who had his. Has his contact information. I don't know that he uses that phone anymore. But the rest of the number was blacked out, and somebody said, I have to share this with you. And I have seen it, and all it says is Robert Prevost, and It was an 815.

[Dan Bernstein]

He can't have his own phone, right?

[Co-host/Commentator]

I mean, I don't know if he does anymore. I do know for a fact he still signs his emails.

[Dan Bernstein]

Bob, he's gotta have, like, a Vatican phone.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm sure he's got many phones, right?

[Dan Bernstein]

I bet you there's still rotary phones there.

[Co-host/Commentator]

The Vatican. Could be. He's got his. Well, he's got his own. He probably has his own phone for, like, my bookie or whatever.

[Dan Bernstein]

I think he still has, like, a bag Phone that, like, plugs into the. Like the lighter in the car. Remember those?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, like the. The Lethal Weapon. Danny Glover on the bridge. Briefcase phone.

[Dan Bernstein]

Did you have one of those? I had a bag phone. No, I had a bag phone in the car plugged into the lighter.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We were not, as a family. We were not early adopters. We were like the last family of a microwave oven.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I had one of my last.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Family to have a vcr. Last family to have a microwave oven. My mother's like, it's not that hard to boil water to make a hot dog. I don't know why somebody needs a hot dog in 40 seconds. Why can't you just boil like everyone else does? You boil water. You put a hot dog in the boiling water. You simmer the hot dog.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I don't like, boil. I steam them.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm just talking about what my mom used to do.

[Dan Bernstein]

She couldn't make you better hot dogs.

[Co-host/Commentator]

We have a toaster oven. We don't need a microwave.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's why you protect. Because she made bad hot dogs.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, we didn't. Usually I would make the hot dog. Maybe I made bad hot dogs. Yeah, but remember you'd go to a cookout and people would write their name on their hot dog, like, scratch it in there to make sure that everybody got their own hot dog in the hot dog.

[Dan Bernstein]

What kind of place did you go? They didn't have the hot dogs.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, no. At day camp sometimes before I went to overnight camp, when it was cookout day, you had to bring your own stuff to eat.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And so you wouldn't get it confused with everybody else like that. I would get all scared.

[Dan Bernstein]

What a camp was this? They couldn't provide hot dogs.

[Co-host/Commentator]

This one didn't.

[Dan Bernstein]

I'm sure they charge enough money.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I don't. Well, I went to multiple day camps. I went to Vernon.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I mean, I don't blame your parents.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I went to Tacoma and then I went to Apache.

[Dan Bernstein]

Parents didn't see you for the whole summer?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Well, no, it's day camp. They couldn't wait to send me to overnight camp. I bet eight weeks when I was nine.

[Dan Bernstein]

See ya. Your parents didn't cry when you went to college either?

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, hey, they cried when they saw the bill.

[Dan Bernstein]

The first big milestone for spring arriving In Chicago is February 24th, when the city goes over 11 hours of daylight. It'll be the first time since October.

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, no, no, no. You can. You can spring. You can. You can see it. You can see it in the. In the way the sunlight changes End of January starts to feel like spring, and then by March, the Coho are in, then the small east come in, and then we're. Then.

[Dan Bernstein]

Then you're cooking.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Then life is good.

[Dan Bernstein]

Do you think the White Sox win a World Series now? Now, because they got Rock Chalowski.

[Co-host/Commentator]

They didn't get Rock Chalice. They have number one pick.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's not done yet.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Maybe Rock Chalowski, and it's. It's a baseball pick. A lot of number one picks are bad.

[Dan Bernstein]

Rock won't be, though. He won't. No, I think he's going to be good.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You think? Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

As long as he plays on the south side.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I was watching NBA Prime, NBA on Prime and Amazon last night.

[Dan Bernstein]

Were the Bulls on?

[Co-host/Commentator]

No. I. I certainly hope that some of these networks didn't say, oh, The Bulls are 6 and 1. We gotta. We gotta flex them to a bunch of games.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, the Bulls helped you out with that real quick.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yeah, trash the NBA prime halftime crew, their desk, they've gotta just relax. Everybody take a deep breath.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I haven't. I haven't checked any of it out.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I've just stopped trying to force the yucks.

The desk right now reminds me of, like, local news crosstalk.

[Dan Bernstein]

That.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like that fake. That's a good story there. Let's send it over to Tom with sports.

[Dan Bernstein]

Last night, it was. Steve Nash was one of the guys. Does he have things to say he.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Didn'T want to be there?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, it doesn't. I wouldn't pick him as a guy that has things to say.

[Co-host/Commentator]

He didn't want to be there.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

He barely spoke audibly, and they even tried to do a thing for him. Like, they showed a guy drinking Tim Horton's Coff coffee at the Raptors game.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay. Like, oh, fine, by the way, I don't know if you've ever had it. Fine. Nothing special.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And. And they go, hey, Steve, look. How Canadian is this? The guy's got. They zoom in. It's like Tim Hortons. And he's like, yeah, that's Tim Hortons.

And they're kind of looking at each other. And then Taylor works is like, oh, I know what I would get. I would get. I'd probably order a peppermint mocha latte.

How about you, Steve?

[Dan Bernstein]

Steve. Steve's like, I don't drink coffee.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Steve Nash says, black coffee.

[Dan Bernstein]

Wow.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I just get black coffee. And then there's this long pause. Was it Udonis Haslam or it wasn't Blake? Because Blake Griffin knew it was bad.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Commentator]

You could tell that he knew it was bad. And then there was. I think it was you, Donnis Haslam. He says something like, that's a strong coffee order there, bro. That's strong. And they're trying so hard.

[Dan Bernstein]

We should have told me this sooner. I would have pulled that. I wouldn't play that to entertain the audience. That was. I apologize for all of you out there that we didn't have that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And I like Blake Griffin, and I think Blake Griffin's funny.

[Dan Bernstein]

I'm sure he's good on it. I mean, he actually has a personality and he can talk, but he's been.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Taking acting lessons, I think, or improv lessons. Blake Griffin's legitimately fun money. And he was looking around like, ooh, this isn't working. I think his comic sensibilities understood that.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like, are they trying to replicate what it reminded?

[Co-host/Commentator]

No, it's serious.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like what they have with Shaq.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Yes, everybody's trying to replicate.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, but you can't do that. That's those guys. That's why it worked.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I know. You can't just be like, guys, be funny, make fun of each other.

[Dan Bernstein]

Be Shaq and Kenny.

[Co-host/Commentator]

If it really were like that, Blake Griffin would have said, wait, nice comic timing there, Steve.

[Dan Bernstein]

You know, he made fun of it.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Like, Steve, you want to be here? Hey, buddy. Hey. Anytime you want to join the fray here.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I didn't need to see it to know that Steve Nash wouldn't be someone you'd want to hear talk. He just doesn't have anything to say.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I didn't know that.

I didn't know.

[Dan Bernstein]

I would just. I would. I would. That would have been my guess if you just said, Steve Nash is going to be on this. I'm not tuning studio show. I would have been like, yeah, no.

[Co-host/Commentator]

But it's got a ways to go. And stop trying to recreate the NBA and tnt.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, you can't touch that.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's just a special thing that appeared. And I don't know that even it is what it was in that regard. Now that it's on espn, it doesn't feel the same. The same kind of freewheeling, anti establishment kind of thing. December does not have to be the most expensive month of the year if you're betting with my book. So you should be. Go to my bookie, use our code dbu, and then you make your deposit and you're having fun with all the stuff. We're talking about a couple bucks here, a couple bucks there. You do some parlays. 12 Days of Christmas is coming soon. And that means daily offers back to back across sports and casino bet and gets profit boosts, free spins, surprise drops just for social and telegram users. December's packed NFL bowl season, college hoops all serving up opportunities to cash. So go to my bookie. The code for Dan Bernstein Unfiltered DBU. Get your first bet covered up to $500. If you go big and miss on the first bet, well, you know what you do? You use your bet back bonus token and then you run it back so you can bet on anything, anywhere, anytime, only with my bookie. That will do it for Dan Bernstein Unfiltered on this Wednesday. And we have been brought to you in partnership with. Wait, you put your finger up.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I want to just tell people, hey, Friday, coming up, we have top 10 browns.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, I got to get to work.

[Dan Bernstein]

Of all time. Yeah, it's Wednesday, man. You got to get that going.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I know, I know. It's going to be hard.

[Dan Bernstein]

And we'll also have Friday feedback Friday.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And yes, some of the voice messages that you have left on our app can and will be featured.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, we're going to play some of those.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Oh, yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's what it's for. All right, well, people, put some work in.

[Dan Bernstein]

Do me a bit of a favor and I've got.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Got them. I'll send them to you.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like, ahead of time. Would be cool. Like before Friday. That would be great.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'm going to.

[Dan Bernstein]

That'd be cool.

[Co-host/Commentator]

That's at the 312Sports app.

[Dan Bernstein]

Don't even act like there's something you.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Wouldn'T do in the Apple App Store and Google Play.

[Dan Bernstein]

You see this segment starting, be like, hey, do you have those things I want? No, it didn't. Tell me.

[Co-host/Commentator]

I'll send it to you. I'm giving everybody another day at least to send those in.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, please. Because we haven't had enough yet.

[Co-host/Commentator]

And please only send it once. Don't send the same thing five times.

[Dan Bernstein]

Or the 12 that came through from the one guy. Yesterday was late. It literally came through 12 times. I'm like, why did he send 12 messages?

[Co-host/Commentator]

I know. I was getting ready to go to bed and I'm going, God darn it. I'm just.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, you're a good man.

[Co-host/Commentator]

Just one. Just send one at a time. We appreciate them because there's some very creative things and we're going to do that Friday feedback Friday. And the top 10 Browns of all time. We have been brought to you in partnership with my book, Dan Bernstein Unfiltered. Unfiltered on 312Sports.

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