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Mark McCray
You know what's missing? Real talk about what Black men go through mentally and emotionally. Man Listen Mental Health Conversations for Men of Color we're diving into the real stuff. The pressure, the struggles, the healing. No filters, just brothers sharing their truth about navigating life and finding purpose. Whether you're living it, supporting someone who is, or just want to understand, this is for you. I'm Mark McCray and I'm ready to have these conversations. Find us by searching Man Listen Mental wherever you get your podcast.
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Dan Bernstein
Dan Bernstein Unfiltered Unfiltered
Alex Cohen
on 312 Sports DBU on 312 is brought to you in partnership with my bookie. The Bulls are going to introduce Thiago Splitter as their brand new, very tall head coach at a press conference tomorrow afternoon. And we'll get to know this guy. I just think that there's important things to remember as we embark into this new the New Bulls world. The new journey. First of all, just how nice it feels to not have the same kind of weight, to have this freshness about it, to know that they've thrown open the doors, that there's been a spring cleaning that they can get in there, clean out the cobwebs, get into all the old closets, say, do we need this? That's what the Bulls seem to be doing right now, is they're going through stuff. Do we need to throw it out? Do we need this? Maybe store that for a while. Do we need this? Keep that. When in doubt, throw it out and move on with stuff. Get new eyes, new perspectives, new ideas, a new plan, starting from scratch and even looking as if you're, you know, whatever the book had been whatever the institutional knowledge was of your old players or your current players. Now you have an entirely new prism through which to see some of that, and that's great. I also want to warn you that one thing that you need to appreciate as a Bulls fan was how gifted a talker Billy Donovan was and is at some point, whenever he wants, Billy Donovan is going to have a job talking because he's great at it. And for a long time I thought that one of Billy Donovan's negatives was that the stuff that he would say after a game or in between games was stuff that's like, wow, you see what we're seeing? Act on it. What can you do about it? It almost felt like the Billy Donovan that we would hear very sensibly breaking down some of the things the Bulls weren't doing well, wasn't the same guy when the game started, had the opportunity to make some of these decisions and sit some of these guys down and take other out. For the most part, my favorite aspect of the Billy Donovan coaching tenure here was how much I learned about basketball, how much I learned about the modern NBA game and how we reminding myself that no matter how much I've been steeped in what the NBA has been, it's different than what the NBA is and what the NBA will be. It's changing very, very rapidly. And that's cool, it's exciting, it's dynamic. And this is part of that. This is part of it. This is part of understanding the changing nature of the league, what has to be done and how and when and how they're going to try to play the game that other teams are playing without playing catch up like they have been. So we'll hear from Splitter, we'll hear how he sounds and what he has to say. He's got a fascinating history. As young as he is, it really is. There's an article that I suggest you get a look at that was published in Brazil in an online magazine called Basquete B A S Q U E T E and it's obviously translated from the Portuguese. And it was written by Tiago Splitter. And this was in 2019. This is in September of 2019. So this is seven years old, but I think it is very telling and foundational to who the new Bulls coach is. And I know that at a press conference we're going to get the usual stuff about what do you think of Josh Giddey and how many games you want to win and what are fair expectations and what's your style and all that, but I had no idea what he has been through. And this article talking about the death of his sister from leukemia, how that was concurrent with some struggles that he was having to break into the rotation in San Antonio and emotionally what Gregg Popovich meant to him, how he had to go to Spain to get medication for his sister that wasn't available in Brazil. And his story of packing a suitcase with ice packs to keep the medicine viable, to bring it back, to try to keep her alive and everything he discussed. I did not know that he's German originally and grew up in Brazil, but he's of German extraction. And that's why this internationalness. You thought that it was. It was one thing to have your, you know, Lithuanian, the Lithuanian basketball star. This guy is, you know, coached in Paris, coached pro ball in Paris, originally from Germany, grew up in Brazil and played with the spurs and has played with. With all sorts of other teams. I mean, played European basketball and, you know, the best player at his position in European basketball before he went to the Spurs. It is a fascina. Fascinating resume and a really interesting history for a very interesting guy. He went away to play when he was a child. He went away when he was 14, I think already 6, 7 when he was 14 years old. And talks about having a Serbian coach in Spain. They would run up mountains and then run shuttles and. And they would. He said, I witnessed people vomit blood fall on the floor. It was crazy. I cried hidden away. I wanted to go back to Brazil. If I had to do that to become a player, I wasn't going to become one. But I realized this wasn't physical, it was mental. That's what they were trying to teach us. I still talk to the guys who were on that team. We learned that at the end of a game when we're too tired with the monumental pressure bearing down on us. Nothing compares with what we went through in those practices. And he talks about the physical and mental ordeal that he went through with that and then losing his sister. And it's really fascinating who he is, what his story is, and I would urge you, as a Bulls fan, get to know him a little bit. I don't know what he's going to be like as a talker. I don't know what he's going to be like after games. He's not going to be Billy Donovan, but. But I do think that we are going to have a. An executive who's going to talk a lot more. I think Bryson Graham, as we have realized, is very accessible, upbeat, Accessible, likes talking and is going to be more available. And I think it's going to balance out nicely. I think we're going to get a better mix of who's talking when it's not just going to be the coach all the time answering questions for the entire organization. So I am really interested in getting to know Tiago Splitter a lot more. And congrats to the Bulls for having now the two tallest coaches ever in the NBA. Bill Cartwright at 7:1, Thiago Splitter at 6:11. 611.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
And how tall was Phil Jackson? Around 6:9, 6:10, 6:9. I think he played 6, 8, 6, 9. I don't know. He's probably settled a little bit and hunched over with all the issues that he's had. Who'd be the. Who's the fourth tallest bullet? Doug Collins at six five. No, there's got to be somebody in there but Cartwright. I kept thinking like Patrick Ewing was an NBA head coach, right? No, no, it was college. No, he didn't coach. He hasn't coached in the NBA. Tree Rollins. Is he ever. There's been some dudes, but congratulations to the Bulls.
Dan Bernstein
My buddy said very tall. Text me yesterday, said he sounds like he talks to me. He sounds like physic from Princess Bride. Ah, that's what he sounds like. That's at least what he said. And I. I haven't watched any videos of it. I hope that's true. And I hope he rhymes everything he says.
Alex Cohen
Anybody want the peanut?
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Hello, lady.
Dan Bernstein
That's how he starts the press conference. Hello, lady.
Alex Cohen
Hello, lady.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, he pulls the Mike Rabel and gets the.
Alex Cohen
He fits the quarter. He said I could have was at Miracle Max's. All right, that'll work. But good luck to Tiago Splitter. I look forward to meeting him. I look forward to finding out more about him. But I really do urge you to look up this story. It's called, it's under the opinion section in Basquete. Their opinion, the way they spell it. O, P I Nia with a tilde over it and an O. Basket Day Opinio on limits and sacrifices by tiago splitter in 2019, Johnny Kerr.
Dan Bernstein
Johnny Red Kerr was 6, 9.
Alex Cohen
Yes. He was tall.
Dan Bernstein
Yep.
Alex Cohen
And then all the members of his family were buried with him on Thursday.
Mark McCray
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Johnny, their first ever coach, correct?
Dan Bernstein
Yes, first ever.
Alex Cohen
How tall was Ed Badger? Find me the height of Ed Badger and the head of Alfredo Garcia while you're at it. Nobody got that joke. When I was doing Rockford Cubbies games, there was A pitcher named Alfredo Garcia and he got sheltered or something. I said, well, they've gotten the head of Alfredo Garcia. And people looked at me like the Sam Peckinpah movie. Anybody? Nothing.
Dan Bernstein
He was six' four.
Alex Cohen
Okay. I feel like JD Sitting next to Alex Cohen sometimes. It's like once a game, JD Will say something. There's crickets. Just absolutely nothing.
Mark McCray
I forgot.
Dan Bernstein
Pete Myers was the coach, wasn't he?
Alex Cohen
Just interim.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, yeah. Just interim. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
I don't think he ever got the head job, as it were. I don't think he ever did.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. Oh, it was just one game. Yeah.
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Okay.
Dan Bernstein
That's why I forgot.
Alex Cohen
I think it's okay.
Dan Bernstein
Well, I. I forgot. Oh, three games total, because twice.
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
He served after Cartwright, before Skiles, after Skiles, before Boylan.
Alex Cohen
What's got Skiles up to these days?
Dan Bernstein
How tall was he?
Alex Cohen
Six two, six two or six three?
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, I think so. Where. What's he doing? Where's our guy? Where is Scott Skiles?
Dan Bernstein
6 1.
Alex Cohen
What did Terry always say is hobby? We were making up hobbies for Scott Skiles, and he said it was naked jet skiing. He just decided arbitrarily that was his hobby. We have a battle of the baseball stars brewing in New York.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, it's interesting. I'm glad that you're bringing this up because I was looking at the schedule today and I thought, wow, that's going to be. Well, you got. You got two starters, first of all, that are two of the best in the game right now. And then you got lots of start. It was Aaron Judge out. Is he.
Alex Cohen
Aaron Judge is out.
Dan Bernstein
Rib fracture.
Alex Cohen
Aaron Judge is out. But I was including him this because I'm thinking, you know, this is pretty spectacular stuff if you look at it.
Dan Bernstein
Is it? Sure.
Alex Cohen
And who might be on all Star teams here? I didn't really think of this as truly a, you know, marquee series in that regard. Like a real ass American League White Sox in New York series. But it's a big series. There is one team. So here's what I looked at, fan graphs. Wins above replacement. There is one team that has four representatives in the top 25 of American League wins above replacement. And that's the Yankees. Okay, so the Yankees have Ben rice, who is seventh at 2.7. Cody Bellinger who is 13th at 2.3. Aaron Judge still hanging at 17th at 2.1. And Jazz Chisholm Jr. Is 24th at 1.7.
Dan Bernstein
Players, Sox have three.
Alex Cohen
Well, the Detroit has three. Dylan Dingler's fourth, Kevin McGonagall is five.
Dan Bernstein
Is he really?
Alex Cohen
Yeah, they're at 3.2 and 3.0, respectively.
Dan Bernstein
Wow.
Alex Cohen
And then also on that list, Riley Green is 22nd at 1.9. I did nothing to. But there are your Chicago White Sox with three represented in the top 25.
Dan Bernstein
So Montgomery.
Alex Cohen
Montgomery is ninth at 2.5.
Dan Bernstein
Vargas.
Alex Cohen
Vargas is just like thousandths behind him. Also at 2.5. At 10th. Can you tell me who's 25th?
Dan Bernstein
It's not Murakami, is it?
Alex Cohen
Actually, you know what? You know what? I miscounted. Murakami is still on here.
Dan Bernstein
So they have four.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, Murakami is on here. I thought he was. Yes, Murakami is at 2.0, tied with Yandy Diaz. So Murakami is there. Okay, so that's three. So if I'm counting judge, I got to count Murakami. That's three. So these are the two teams with four then this really is the more of a marquee matchup than I even thought.
Dan Bernstein
Who's the.
Alex Cohen
Who's 25th?
Dan Bernstein
25th would be. It's not Minecraft.
Alex Cohen
Minecraft Is it really? It is. Chase my droth.
Dan Bernstein
Sweet.
Alex Cohen
At 1.6. These are the only two teams in this league. I didn't bother checking the National League, but Both teams have four guys in the top 25 of individual war.
Dan Bernstein
And that's just American League. You looked at. It's the list of American League. Okay, so it's not baseball.
Alex Cohen
It's not all of baseball. But I don't care about that right now.
Dan Bernstein
No, no, no. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
I'm just looking at. This is. This is really deserving of, you know, this, this sort of kind of attention. We all have White Sox, Yankees memories.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
You know, mine involve Carlton Fisk tagging two guys out. We all remember two guys.
Dan Bernstein
Wow.
Alex Cohen
We remember Tom Seaver getting his 300th win. I remember the, the series against the Yankees where Harold Banes kept driving in game winning runs that got Yogi Berra fired. When the White Sox swept that series, I think that was the first time I heard Hawk describe Ozzy. Guillen is just setting them up when Ozzy would be up there to have three of the worst swings you've ever seen in your life. It's like foul ball, swinging a miss, swinging a miss, opposite field, triple.
Dan Bernstein
Well, it's, it's too bad that this White Sox team wasn't the White Sox team to play the first three games of the season against the brewers when they got their shit kicked in.
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
Would have. Would have taken a Nice couple wins there. This is good, though. This is good that you're going to highlight this matchup. Will is. Now I know John Shambi has been out. Is he, is he doing the Sox game? The socks Yankee series? Maybe I could watch on tv. No. No. Oh, I didn't know. It's Connor.
Alex Cohen
No.
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
I know it's always a letdown to be like.
Dan Bernstein
But it's good that you're highlighting this series though. This is good that you're going to talk a Little White stocks 1st place White Sox and the. What?
Alex Cohen
What are you doing?
Dan Bernstein
I'm not doing anything. I'm just saying that we're talking White Sox because a lot of people want us to. Who? A lot of people who. A lot of people that hate us, that don't care what we have to say, want us to talk more white.
Alex Cohen
Wait, why do they care?
Dan Bernstein
I don't know.
Alex Cohen
Okay. All right. Well, I'm just talk about what? I don't know. I just, I woke up thinking there's a lot of stars, lot of stars here.
Dan Bernstein
This is, this is a huge marquee matchup for.
Alex Cohen
I didn't realize there were that many White Sox American League stars. They're going to have some representatives on this all star team.
Dan Bernstein
Yes, they are.
Alex Cohen
They're going to be just.
Dan Bernstein
And you're not even, you're not even talking about the pitcher tonight.
Alex Cohen
Davis Martin.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. Who has an all Star. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
But I'm, you know, I'm not going there with wins.
Dan Bernstein
Just. I know, I know.
Alex Cohen
Do me a favor if you want to talk and maybe I'll be completely, you know, over the moon about pitchers. Just don't give me win loss record. You can give me his 2.38 FIP. You can give me his 2.9 War. There's all sorts of great numbers for Davis Martin that are way more telling, way more significant loss and way more in his control that show his ability than one loss record. So for everybody who's still mentioning that. Stop. You know better.
Dan Bernstein
I would love to know because I haven't taken a deep dive into Davis. Martin is what's, what's changed for him this year.
Alex Cohen
Well, he was hurt, wasn't he?
Dan Bernstein
Oh, was it all injury related or.
Alex Cohen
I thought he had a series of injuries. I mean, you can kind of look and see where he's improved, but I don't know enough about his pitching to go into the granular stuff like you were doing earlier with Cabrera, diagnosing Cabrera. I just know that his, his, the batted ball numbers look better because he. His hard contact is down and actually soft contact is. Is down too. There. Hitters are not pulling the ball as much. They're hit to the opposite field. So that could be good on timing issues. But I don't know enough about how he's varied his pitches by percentage. It looks like he's throwing the fastball a little bit less. He's throwing the sinker more. He's throwing the slider a lot more and the curveball a lot more. So last year he was throwing 33% fastballs. He was throwing 23% cutters, 11% sinkers, only 4.3% sliders. Does he. He has all these pitches. Then he's got the curveball at 4.8% and the change up at 24.2. So the pitch mix is wildly different. Wildly different. His, he's almost tripled the curveball usage. And he's throwing it harder. He's throwing the change up less. He's throwing the slider 10% more. 4.3 up to 14.8. And he's throwing it way harder. His slider has jumped from 83.4 miles an hour to 87.3. So that's huge.
Mark McCray
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Fastball velocity is up from 93.9 to 94.2. Cutter velocity, I'll be throwing the cutter 10% less. So it looks like he's throwing sliders instead of cutters. He's throwing more sinkers than four seam or more sinkers in not more than four seam fastballs, but he is throwing more sinkers, taking those away from four seam fastballs. But it's that the curve and the slider, the breaking stuff that he's throwing much more often and much harder.
Dan Bernstein
So he's throwing them more often this year.
Alex Cohen
More often. And the slider usage jumped from 4.4.3% to 14.8.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, wow.
Alex Cohen
Curveball usage jumped from 4.8 to 12.8.
Dan Bernstein
I credit the White Sox on that because his pitching run value is at 97, which is. Which is great.
Alex Cohen
He's throwing both harder. So that is.
Dan Bernstein
And this show is here because his off speed run value is at 97, which is. That's phenomenal.
Alex Cohen
Well, maybe Brian Bannister and the people saw something, but I just don't know why he's throwing it harder. That's what. It's one thing to just use it more. It's another thing to increase its efficacy because it's just become a better, more dangerous pitch. I wonder if they've become better pitches.
Dan Bernstein
I wonder if there's a mechanical reasoning
Alex Cohen
behind that, something they saw, sometimes it's a grip change.
Dan Bernstein
Could be a grip.
Mark McCray
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
That's great. Oh, man, his numbers look great.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, they do. Yeah, there's some sparkling stuff on there for him. He will be an all star, if not the starter. Damn it.
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Alex Cohen
Get that Amex gold cart ready.
Dan Bernstein
I'm way too tired to cook tonight.
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Alex Cohen
Yes.
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Alex Cohen
You know, every sports fan has an angle. It could be just a team you trust or the favorite you want to fade the player you think is due. That moment you feel in a game before everybody else notices. You're like, hold on a second here. Or maybe, maybe you get somebody who on a podcast says, I think Alex Bregman is going to get me those. Those two total bases.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, did he get them?
Alex Cohen
He sure did.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, he didn't.
Alex Cohen
Pl plus odds on those Bregman total bases. And they came through for you. I wonder what odds you would have gotten on a PCA cycle in Wrigley Field. I wonder what odds you get on a reverse cycle. Like, in order, a natural reverse cycle. That would be crazy. But that's where my bookie comes in. My bookie gives you a place to turn all these observations, all these opinions into action. Maybe you're watching baseball, maybe you're watching World Cup. Whatever. You got a promo code. DBU for Dan Bernstein. Unfiltered. Use that when you sign up. You register, you make your deposit. Use dbu, and then you get that exclusive offer just because you are listening. You can back your team before the game. Follow the momentum, live. Make the moments you Already care about, feel bigger. And that's the reason to check out my bookie. My pen broke. I have to move to pen broke.
Dan Bernstein
Pines.
Alex Cohen
You're already watching. You already have a take. And Skypoint, Terry. And now you have a place to play it. But on anything, anywhere, anytime, with my Bookie must be 21 plus. Please gamble responsibly. What? Stop.
Dan Bernstein
Nothing. I didn't even check my scores from last night. Because you hit your Bregman. Yeah. And remember, I started my baseball picks last night with a 14 parlay and I won.
Alex Cohen
Did you really?
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Did you really?
Dan Bernstein
Phillies won seven nothing. The Nationals won seven to three.
Alex Cohen
How about it?
Dan Bernstein
Cubs came back and won five to four. And the late game? The Dodgers ended up winning four to three. They were down three nothing.
Alex Cohen
Oh, you could have had a really exciting, dramatic evening if you wanted.
Dan Bernstein
I didn't. I totally forgot to check. Yeah, that was a big one too, because that was a. I got to show you what I put on that. What? What came through. I totally forgot to look because I checked Rays and Dodgers and they were down three nothing. And I forgot about it.
Alex Cohen
You know the lesson that you learn about that is the best way to invest?
Dan Bernstein
To not care.
Alex Cohen
With your 401. Forget it. 401. Set it. Pick your four tranches, set it to auto rebalancing and then look at it again in 30 years.
Dan Bernstein
Well, shoot, 30 years, that'd be old.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, well, I mean older. Well, I mean, it's too late now.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, you meant like younger.
Alex Cohen
I'm two years away from being able to be able to tap dat, as it were.
Dan Bernstein
Well, not almost. You got a few more days yet before you're 58.
Alex Cohen
What day is it? I've got eight days. I got eight days and then two years and then.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, then you're gonna tap dat.
Alex Cohen
Time to tap dat. And then I could drastically change my life once it's time to. I don't know. Maybe I'll find time for fishing things. Yeah, right. Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
So good at 4.
Mark McCray
0.
Dan Bernstein
I'll take it.
Alex Cohen
There you go. Well done. Congratulations. I'm very, very proud of you. You know what else? I am. I, I. I shouldn't be this.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, wait a second. Wait, wait, wait. Before you go on.
Alex Cohen
Yes.
Dan Bernstein
Davis Martin. I wanted to finish up.
Alex Cohen
Not Martin. Davis. Davis Martin.
Dan Bernstein
Who is it? It's Davis Martin, Right?
Alex Cohen
Davis Martin.
Dan Bernstein
He's the pitcher for the White Sox.
Alex Cohen
Correct.
Dan Bernstein
His hard hit rate, he's at 9% in the league. That's not good. Like, he's in the bottom nine.
Alex Cohen
Percent for hard hit rate. When I looked at that, I said, oh, okay.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, but that's about the only thing that's consistent from last year, the hard hit rate. Yeah. I would love to know what they did to. And I know, I mean he had, you're right. I mean just looking at his numbers, he.
Alex Cohen
Well, that had some interesting. That was my first time really glancing at it.
Progressive Insurance Announcer
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
23, 24.
Alex Cohen
They're not highlighting. I don't have any like color coded anything those. But those are the numbers that scream off the page to me.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. But yeah, I would love to know what, what the difference was between last year and this year. And again, that's really the only thing that is kind of consistent, that hard hit rate. But everything else is just taking a really great turn. Really exciting.
Alex Cohen
Well, some that's part of a rebuild is you have some expected over performance, you have some unexpected over performance and you try to figure out what's sustainable and make your decisions with that, with the information you get. There are a lot of people that thought that Vargas is never going to
Progressive Insurance Announcer
hit
Alex Cohen
and he is hitting now. He's. I, I love his aggressiveness, man. He goes up there, you know, looking to hit the ball. He's not up there trying to find a walk or just one pitch in every at bat. He's up there ready to crank.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. And they're slightly ahead percentage points wise of the, of the guardians. So first place White Sox for and what are they? Six games over. Yeah, six games over. Taking on the first place Yankees are 43 and 27. Yeah, it's a fun, that'd be a fun matchup. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Now Knicks fans are going to need something to do. So I don't know among Knicks fans, I don't know what the split is between Yankees and Mets. We'll see if the, you know, they, they bring all that energy. All of the New York SP fan energy might be headed over to the new Yankees Stadium.
Dan Bernstein
How does that work? By the boroughs, obviously where the stadiums are. I would assume that those are all fans of the Mets or the Yankees. But how does, how do the other boroughs split?
Alex Cohen
I don't know exactly. I don't, I don't know if it's localized. Mets are in Queens, correct?
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
So obviously Queens has got to be all Mets.
Alex Cohen
I think so.
Dan Bernstein
This is all Yankees.
Alex Cohen
But the history is different. Most of the people from the Bronx, you know, the Bronx has turned over several times back in the day. In the great Yankees heyday, much of the Bronx was Eastern European Jews. It was Russian Jews and German Jews, and they're gone now. And just like the same neighborhoods that were here around, a lot of the northwest side of Chicago was similarly there. You're talking about people that went to Mather and Sen and all that, and that turned over. I don't know.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
I'd like to see a fandom map of New York in particular, because it's such a melting pot that you've got. You've got people from.
Dan Bernstein
And I wonder too, what the history of the Dodgers. How that Giants. Oh, yeah, and the Giants, too. How that still lingers there from, you know, family, like grandfathers and fathers that were fans.
Alex Cohen
Sure.
Dan Bernstein
If that. If that stayed there.
Alex Cohen
As to whether or not the non Yankee fans that were Giants or Dodgers fans stayed with those when they moved west or else that transferred to the Metropolitans when they arrived, I don't know.
Dan Bernstein
Interesting. One other thing, because you mentioned the Knicks. Did you see what Cookie Monster had to say to Elmo?
Alex Cohen
I heard about it, but this is. This been your. You know, your Bailey.
Dan Bernstein
So apparently Cookie Monster, he said. He told Elmo, said Elmo, teach me not to eat trophy. Me teach Elmo to pick a team. So Cookie Monster throwing some shade at Elmo, too. So one of my favorite stories of this year's finals, I mean, the Knicks fans that went after Elmo and continued to go after Elmo was just great.
Alex Cohen
Have you ever met Cookie Monster?
Dan Bernstein
No. We know he was actually all the.
American Express Announcer
All.
Dan Bernstein
Is that Sesame Street. All the characters were at beaches and Turks and Caicos.
Alex Cohen
Okay.
Dan Bernstein
Because that's like the little kitty thing is all Sesame Street. So there were characters all over. So I saw Cookie Monster walking through beaches, which I would imagine would be really hot and smelly in that costume because it was. It was warm and humid. I did not stop and talk to him. So to answer your question, I have never met Cookie Monster.
Alex Cohen
All right. Well, have you? Yes.
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
Cookie Monster is from here. Cookie Monsters from Highland Park.
Dan Bernstein
What do you mean?
Alex Cohen
It's David Rudman. It's Cookie Monster.
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
David Rudman went to Highland park, and I used to play basketball against his brothers.
Dan Bernstein
Wait, so you're talking about the guy who was the, like, the voice. The mup.
Alex Cohen
The puppeteer of Cookie and voice and puppeteer.
Dan Bernstein
Okay. So you asked me if I've ever met the man. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Cookie Monster. No, no, no, no. But, like, I've met. It's weird. It's weird because I. It was at a charity event.
Dan Bernstein
Does he talk like. Is that his normal voice?
Alex Cohen
Well, and he's so when you. To me, he stands up and he has Cookie Monster on his hand. And as he's talking, it doesn't matter that there's a guy there.
Dan Bernstein
So you're looking at the person.
Alex Cohen
You're looking at Cookie Monster.
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
And you know that he's there. And it's not ventriloquism. He's not pretending to not talk.
Dan Bernstein
He just. He does normal. Because you don't see him. Yeah, you do, but now you do because you're standing in front of him.
Alex Cohen
Yes. And it's. It's.
Dan Bernstein
I.
Alex Cohen
You. You're. Somehow your brain just doesn't register that it's a guy from Highland park standing there doing. It's like, oh, that's just Cookie mouse.
Dan Bernstein
So does he keep the puppet on his arm all the time?
Alex Cohen
No, I don't think.
Dan Bernstein
Does he bring it to bed with him?
Alex Cohen
Honey, honey, no. Different puppet.
Dan Bernstein
I think making whoopee is Cookie Monster.
Alex Cohen
Maybe he's got a different. Different puppet. Yeah. Because that would. I don't even want to be begin thinking about that.
Dan Bernstein
All right. Sorry, Cookie Monster.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, Apologize. But yes, I have. I have met Cookie Monster. Good dude. And I didn't. I would say this. I didn't so much play basketball against his brother and his cousin as much as be a traffic cone out there while his brother and cousin went around everybody.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, they were just.
Alex Cohen
Oh, well, Peter Rudman was.
Dan Bernstein
They didn't play with puppets on, did they?
Alex Cohen
No, he played Lehigh. He was a Division 1. And you know, coming out of Highland park, there aren't a lot of those. It's kind of a unicorn. When you show up in Highwood with Mr. Baker's Highwood small fry basketball, and there's a guy there who's like six, four, and you're at eight foot rims, and he's dunking on everybody, and you're like, whoa. You know what they call that? That's a big Jew is what that is. Get out the way. Watch your head. Watching Gabacas.
Progressive Insurance Announcer
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
So I'm pleased that Cookie Monster is providing Elmo advice, because that's okay. Cookie Monster is an adult puppet. Elmo is a child puppet. And I do think there should be some mentorship going on between the monsters and between the Muppets.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. And it's good that they can teach each other things. It's a mutually beneficial relationship.
Alex Cohen
Yeah. That Elmo can teach Cookie to not eat the trophy.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, don't eat the trophy.
Alex Cohen
Don't eat Larry o' Brien's trophy.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
It's Bad.
Dan Bernstein
Or Larry o'. Brien.
Alex Cohen
Well, yeah, I don't think Larry's around. Larry's long dead.
Dan Bernstein
No longer with us.
Alex Cohen
I think that's so. And yeah, by the way, the David Rudman is also Scooter, Janice, and Beaker.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, I like Beaker.
Alex Cohen
Everybody loves Beaker.
Dan Bernstein
Wait, which one was Janice?
Alex Cohen
Janice is the backup singer with the blonde hair.
Dan Bernstein
Star in Trends.
Alex Cohen
No, she looks like Joni Mitchell. You know, like with the blonde hair and the big lips. I think that's who it is. Right. She's a backing vocalist. She's got the huge eyelashes.
Dan Bernstein
100%. Yeah. You don't see her eyes. You just see eyelashes.
Alex Cohen
Oh, I see. Homage to Janis Joplin bears a resemblance to Mary Travers of Peter, Paul and Mary. Okay, that's what it is.
Dan Bernstein
So this is not. Yeah. She did not go on to star in Friends.
Alex Cohen
No.
Dan Bernstein
Chandler's girl girlfriend.
Alex Cohen
Right.
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
Correct.
Dan Bernstein
Different Janice.
Alex Cohen
Correct. Yes. Got it. You good?
Dan Bernstein
Yep.
Alex Cohen
While we're doing some baseball notes here, by the way.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, yeah. Socks. Game 605 tonight. So that's a nice little. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
And I think we both agree now every seventh inning stretch is. Chicago Gay Men's Chorus.
Dan Bernstein
Yes.
Alex Cohen
Every seventh inning stretch.
Dan Bernstein
I'm all for it. I just.
Alex Cohen
That's all you need right there.
Dan Bernstein
That's all you need is stand up.
Alex Cohen
Know that that's. You got to. It's a low starting note and just be. Belt that thing out.
Dan Bernstein
They were great.
Alex Cohen
Little harmony at the end. Let's get some runs and get out of there.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, he looked right into the camera. Yep. Let's get some runs. I'm all for that. I think that should be the permanent seventh inning stretch at Wrigley Field.
Alex Cohen
And even if you're showing whoever it is, Ron Santo, whoever it is, play them instead.
Dan Bernstein
Yes. Have them sing it. But they can be on the video board. Right.
Alex Cohen
Show whatever you want on the video board. You can show Harry Carey and Bill Murray and whoever it is, Ditka. Fine.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. But just don't have the audio up. Show them. Let them sing every time.
Alex Cohen
A little follow up to. Actually not little. A significant follow up to what we discussed yesterday regarding those jerk offs on the Giants that decided to make their little bigoted statement because they could.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, this is great.
Alex Cohen
Make it all about themselves. So there's two aspects to this. One that I already read to you earlier that just got me, you know, really just emotional about this as I already have been. But here's the really good news. Major League Baseball has warned those Giants pitchers. I did not see this coming for
Dan Bernstein
putting stuff on their uniforms.
Alex Cohen
Major League Baseball from out sports. Major League Baseball issued a response to three Giants pitchers who wrote biblical inscriptions on the team's pride caps. You've been warned. Quote, the writing on the cap violates our rules. And consistent with normal practice, we have warned the players about future violations. This is according to Pat Courtney, MLB's chief communications officer. So what I want to know is, did they do this when Clayton Kershaw did it last year? Did they? Because I don't know. I don't. I didn't read anything. I didn't see any response. Did Clayton Kershaw get the same letter from the league saying this kind of behavior, this kind of bigotry is unacceptable by Major League Baseball? Unacceptable? I don't think they did. I don't think they took on Clayton Kershaw, but they'll take on these guys. And especially because it's San Francisco. That's the thing. Context matters. Place and history matter. And whatever it took to get even a. I'll celebrate even a little slap on the wrist there. I didn't think that baseball had it in him to even say, hey guys, not good. Please don't do this again. But they did. And even it was completely unexpected, but they did.
Dan Bernstein
So to answer your question, Kershaw, this says here on regular Google, Major League Baseball did not issue a public warning or disciplinary action to Kershaw during the 25 season for writing on his pride nightcap.
Alex Cohen
Well, the rules haven't changed. They didn't. There were no tweaks to any official rule book or code of conduct that I know of. So the fact that they would do this now would lead me to believe that had Kershaw done it, would they have the guts to take on a future hall of Famer in a different city? Because he did exactly the same thing with exactly the same kind of bullshit, mealy mouthed explanation for why he was practicing what he was practicing. Now, I also want to single out the work that Anne Killian did in the San Francisco Chronicle. And she is excellent. She's always been excellent. I've enjoyed her work for a long time. But this was meaningful, outstanding stuff from Anne Killian. And this goes to a place that matters. She wrote, the San Francisco Giants have enough problems this season that you wouldn't expect the players to actively try to alienate their fans. 14 games below.500, fourth place in the division, the second worst record in the National League. With numbers like that, you'd think they might do everything in their power to persuade the paying customers they're worth cheering for. Yet some of the snowflakes on the Giants the pitching staff specifically decided to say a Giant fuck you to a good chunk of their fan base on a night that was supposed to be about inclusion. They hijacked the event for their own purposes in the name of Christianity, taking a decidedly unchristian stance of exclusion and judgment. To recap, on Pride Night last Friday at Oracle park, four pitchers on this woebegone team opted to either deface the official uniform or ignore it altogether. Landon Roop, who got rocked for four earned runs and four and two thirds J.T. brubaker, whose scrawl on his cap resembled bathroom stall graffiti, and deposed closer Ryan Walker, who shouldn't try to draw any more ire, all wrote a Bible verse on their official game cap. Sam Hentjes opted not to wear the hat at all. It's just something that I feel like I was forced to support, said Hentius, who became the first Giants player to refuse to wear the Pride night gear. When I quote, don't morally support it, he said, what about the people who support him and his team? What about the city whose name's on the front of his uniform, a city that fully backs his team? Is that not important to him and his band of homophobic brothers? What about the gay teammates? He certainly had the gay employees of the Giants team who work hard to give him a first class experience and have his every need catered to the gay media members who tell his story, let alone all the straight teammates, employees, fans and broadcasters who have gay best friends, gay children, gay loved ones. Now this is the quote that I just love here. This is Mike Kruco, the former Cub pitcher, former Giant, who has been a broadcaster there for how long, 40 years? I think that you have the right as a player to believe and say whatever you want, gruko said. But you have to take a broader look at the city you're playing in. What makes San Francisco so great is the acceptance of others, ethnicities, opinions, cultures, and that extends to the gay community. I would just hope they would understand the demographic of San Francisco and respect people for whom they are. What you do to your uniform, that has weight to it. You can't offend people. Why would you do that? This is Anne Killian writing. Pride is an issue close to Kruco's heart. Kruco's son, Wes, is gay and is married to his partner Ted. Wes, a dancer, is currently performing in Phantom of the Opera at the Orpheum. I'M so proud of him, kruko said. I've seen gay life through my son's eyes. The culture and the community is so beautiful. How about that? How about that? The pitcher's inability to wear the team uniform for a few hours on a night meant to give a large group of their fans a sense of welcome forced the Giants to issue a statement. But the words rang hollow to some fans whose sense of welcome was damaged by a parade of players to the mound who couldn't handle a rainbow symbol on their uniform, who signaled that many of the people in the stands were not worthy of their support. Why did it take the league to issue the warning? Why didn't the Giants react more strongly to having their uniform defaced? Why didn't the team make it clear to every player they were expected to participate that it's part of their big league highly compensated obligation? So the whole disastrous season has raised the question of whether the team's lacking some sort of fundamental character or leadership. On Pride Night, when a rainbow was front and center, the Giants true colors came through. Well said, Ann Killian and well said, Mike Kruko. I just. I don't know how difficult that is. I don't know how difficult it is for these chuds.
Dan Bernstein
So those three pitchers were. Well, three of the pitchers were on the Giants last year and they had. They had a Pride night last year, correct?
Alex Cohen
Yeah. I don't know. What.
Dan Bernstein
Well, I mean, what did they do last year?
Alex Cohen
I don't know. I don't know.
Dan Bernstein
For some reason I can't. I can't find anything as it keeps. It just keeps referring back to this year. So. And every team does a Pride night with the exception of the Rangers.
Alex Cohen
Last night was the Cubs Pride night.
Dan Bernstein
And the Rangers do like a family night. They deliberately stay away from.
Alex Cohen
Yes, the Rangers are the worst. And the Rangers also brought the statue of the racist, actual Texas Ranger law enforcement Ranger that was removed from the airport for being too racist. And the Ranger's like, no, no, no, no, we'll take it right here. We'll take that statue. If it's too racist for the airport, it's not too racist for us.
Dan Bernstein
Right. So they actually host a faith and family night instead where players share personal testimonies of their religious faith, which is
Alex Cohen
also a fuck you. And they'll say it's not, but they're lying and they know it is. Yeah. So there's always. And unfortunately there's. You always say baseball's gonna. Baseball. There's always. You always can be excited about progress. And then you have people trying to drag you backward into worse places and worse times. So let's laud the good and pillory the bad. I will also say that when we talked about Brendan Sorsby yesterday and this horrible situation that was going on with Texas Tech and Ken Paxton deciding they were going to threaten anybody that wouldn't let an inveterate gambling addiction be the quarterback for Texas Tech football, and enough people came together to basically tell Sourcebee, look, you're leaving Texas Tech one way or another. You're not going to play here. Apply for the supplemental draft, go to the NFL, because the question of his eligibility, that was flipped on its head. He should be obviously ineligible for betting 100,000, placed 9,000 bets on college and professional sports, at least 40 bets involving Indiana football while he was on the team. 9,000 bets.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
And his whole reason, his whole reasoning behind saying, you can't keep your mad at me. I'm an addict. It's a disease. Okay, great. But you, you shouldn't necessarily get to play because of that. And Texas Tech decided to launch this massive campaign to say that we don't care that he's a compulsive gambler. We don't care that he's gonna play for us. And everybody looked at Texas, what the hell are you talking about? What are you doing? What are you doing? And why are you doing it? So eventually they decided, just go to the NFL. And now here's the question. You're going into the supplemental draft, which is a blind draft. With each round, every team submits whether or not they would use their pick. And eventually, whenever, wherever he's picked, he's picked by that order in each round. Is somebody going to use a third, a sixth, a seventh? We don't know. My guess is no. My guess is he will go through the process undrafted. Because if you're an NFL team, do the math on that one. Why do you want that? You want those questions? You want to figure that out? You think he's going to help your quarterback room? You think it's somehow he's going to go. Did he go to Mike Vrabel, Wiener Counseling and say, well, it's all right, he's been through the car wash and now it's all fine and he's never going to gamble again? I don't know. I don't know enough about the pathology to know what experts would suggest, but I think it would take a pretty desperate football team who thinks he's good enough and worth it. So on those Axes of good at football and worth the time and the effort and the concern and the liability or whatever it may be. My guess would be no. And let college football kind of wash their hands of this. I will say, though, that it's gonna be something else. These death by a thousand cuts of the NCAA is happening. And we thought that this would be one of the first, you know, crowbars in one of the openings there to break it open further to knock down the NCAA as we know it. That's inevitable. That process has begun and it will not be stopped. But I don't think it's going to be this case now that they were able to have the deus ex machina of the supplemental draft come and say what? Not our problem. Not our problem. NFL's problem. It's over. They're dropping the suits. They're doing it. He's. He's not going to play. It solves the issue. It takes it out of their hands. He's going to go and see if anybody wants to hire him to be a professional quarterback.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. And the worst thing that this does is eliminates all the chaos that you.
Alex Cohen
I know.
Dan Bernstein
Enjoying.
Alex Cohen
I know, I know. But that's why I was saying there will be more chaos. There will be more unhappy uber wealthy coaching emperors who see their fiefdoms being threatened. And they will. And I'll enjoy it. I will have other things to enjoy. But that's. I guess that's the end of that. And then I will bet you that no. Although I did see defector predict. He said, yeah, he'll be a Brown or he'll be a Jet. Those are the only two teams. And what happens next depends on whether there's an NFL team willing to debase itself as much as Texas Tech did in order to employ a quarterback who led Cincinnati to a 7 and 6 record last season.
Dan Bernstein
That sounds like a Jets move for sure. I don't think Browns, I think, I mean, Todd's got enough issues.
Alex Cohen
He'll be a Brown or he will
Dan Bernstein
be a Jet between Sanders and. Who's the other guy there?
Alex Cohen
Well, they got Dylan Gabriel still there.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. No, the Watson between Watson and Sanders, he can. He can't decide who he likes more. He's not going to do that to himself.
Alex Cohen
I don't know.
Dan Bernstein
Unless the troll under the bridge is like, hey, have you seen this Sorsby guy?
Alex Cohen
Maybe that's the guy he gets his football information from. The guy who cuts his hair. Who's the troll under the bridge?
Dan Bernstein
Yes.
Alex Cohen
Hey. Hey.
Dan Bernstein
No, I think I think that's a. That's a job for Brick and Stick.
Alex Cohen
Telling Woody Johnson.
Progressive Insurance Announcer
Yeah.
Alex Cohen
They go running into his office.
Dan Bernstein
I can't remember, is it grandpa or dad?
Alex Cohen
Who is dad?
Dan Bernstein
Dad. Right, dad.
Alex Cohen
Listen, we played a 90 year old dad and they're like 17.
Dan Bernstein
We played this kid on college football and PlayStation. He was really good. Yep. You need to look at this.
Alex Cohen
You got to get this guy.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, he's really good. And all else fails, he can provide some bets for us.
Alex Cohen
9,000.
Dan Bernstein
That's a lot.
Alex Cohen
You're pretty dedicated to that, man. You're really. That's not just like DBU picks, they're 9,000.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. That's a lot.
Alex Cohen
That's what he's admitted to.
Dan Bernstein
Right. Or at least that's. I think they found receipts on that.
Alex Cohen
Right. But he's probably got burners. Like, that's probably the stuff with his actual name.
Dan Bernstein
I don't think. I don't think that's the kind of guy that has burners and tries to hide it.
Alex Cohen
He's just like, bug it. Here we go.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, yeah. He just. I don't think he really cared.
Alex Cohen
All right, this is the bigger question. I've been waiting on this one, and I don't know the answer to it. And I want your honest opinion. I keep seeing trailers now for the movie the Odyssey. No one has ever made a serious version of the Odyssey on screen that's been any good. The only version was a comedy by the Coen brothers called oh Brother, Where Art Thou? Which is a fabulous movie. That's the only version of the Odyssey that has been put on film that's any good. This is Christopher Nolan with a cast that includes Matt Damon as Odysseus.
Dan Bernstein
Trying to get home.
Alex Cohen
Still always trying to bring him home.
Mark McCray
Always.
Alex Cohen
Matt Damon, where is he? He's on Mars. He's coming home. He's Private Ryan and all his brothers are dead. We got to bring him home. That there has been a billion dollar industry in cinema bringing a Matt Damon character home because he can't get home without help.
Dan Bernstein
Well, maybe home doesn't want him.
Alex Cohen
I was just gonna say, what is it about Matt Damon where they don't want. Just stay home.
Dan Bernstein
No, maybe they don't want him home.
Alex Cohen
Why is he bothering so many people? Matt Damon is Odysseus. Tom Holland is Telemachus. Anne Hathaway is Penelope. So he's trying to get home to Anne Hathaway. To Anne Hathaway, the Queen of Ithaca. Robert Pattinson is Antinous.
Dan Bernstein
That's a Dude who plays Batman, right, Plays the new Batman character. Probably Robert Pattinson.
Alex Cohen
Or is that Lupita Nyong'? O? Another dual role. Oh, she's really good, too, as Helen of Troy and Clytemnestra. Yeah, she played a dual role in us and should have been nominated for an Academy Award for either one of those performances, let alone both of those performances. One of the massive snubs I can remember. Zendaya plays Athena. Charlize Theron plays Calypso.
Dan Bernstein
I know she was in it, too.
Alex Cohen
Wow. Benny Safdie is Agamemnon. John Bernthal is Menelaus. Oh, he's in it, too. John Leguizamo is Eumaeus. There's a lot of.
Dan Bernstein
I mean, yeah, Robert Pattinson is the Batman. He's the new bat.
Alex Cohen
So I've seen some of the trailers, I've seen some of the stills. They've got Ludwig Gorenson doing the music. Like, this is an all star show here.
Dan Bernstein
Did you say James Remar? My guy, he's in it, too.
Alex Cohen
James Remar is in it? Yes.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, Ryan Hurst is in it, too.
Alex Cohen
James Remar played Gans in 48 hours.
Dan Bernstein
You probably don't know Ryan Hurst from Sons of Anarchy. He was in that TV series, but he was also. He also played the linebacker. Well, you didn't see the Denzel Washington or the Denzel. The movie. The. Remember the Titans? You didn't see that.
Alex Cohen
Samantha Morton is in it. You remember, she was one of the empaths in the Spielberg movie about pre crime. She was one of the people who could foresee.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, with Tom Cruise. Yes, yes, that one.
Alex Cohen
With the. That's all come true.
Dan Bernstein
Yes.
Alex Cohen
Like with the ads that know you and follow you around and all that.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, speaking of, are you going to see the Disclosure Day? The Alien?
Alex Cohen
Another one where I got to figure out Minority Report. Minority Report.
Dan Bernstein
Thank you.
Alex Cohen
I've got to decide if it's a thing or not.
Dan Bernstein
What do you mean, if it's a thing?
Alex Cohen
This is where I was going to go with the Odyssey.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, yeah, let's take the Odyssey.
Alex Cohen
Sorry, if. If it's a thing, I got to go see it.
Dan Bernstein
Okay, But. Okay, I.
Alex Cohen
And I am not as big a. Christopher. No, but how are you gonna know
Dan Bernstein
if it's a thing, though? Because you don't like. You don't.
Alex Cohen
You don't trust critics, and I do sometimes. There are critics I trust. Yeah. I try to get the tenor of the trustworthy critics.
Dan Bernstein
I don't know how. I don't know a really good way to Verbalize it. But I've seen the trailer a few times now, seeing other movies. I was very excited when I first heard about it, but it's hard. But now that I see it, Dan, I don't know how to verbalize it except to say my gut tells me no. And I don't know why it's telling me no.
Alex Cohen
Because there's a reason why nobody's bitten this off. There's a reason why directors won't do it. It's never been done. This is the story. This is the monomyth, the hero's journey where we've seen any number of every other kind of.
Dan Bernstein
So have you seen the Kirk Douglas one, Ulysses? No, that was like 1950s. You didn't see.
Alex Cohen
When all the epics were being.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, I didn't see it.
Alex Cohen
Right. Spartacus and then all that stuff.
Dan Bernstein
But
Alex Cohen
no, like, for me, the version of it that is the best movie is oh, Brother, Where Art Thou?
Dan Bernstein
Which I didn't know was a loosely based. More than retelling of it.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, more than loosely. You have the Sirens, you have the Cyclops. The reason why John Goodman.
Dan Bernstein
Now, I didn't know that the warriors, also, the New York gang film from the late 70s, was also. Was loose. Loose telling a retelling of the story.
Alex Cohen
Never seen it.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, really? Yeah, I have. Yeah. As a kid, I saw it.
Alex Cohen
Isn't that the. Can you dig it?
Dan Bernstein
Right. I just remember the bottles clinking together and, you know, calling the warriors out. But, yeah, I didn't know that was based on the Odyssey as well. Apparently. There was an NBC miniseries that was really good.
Alex Cohen
Okay.
Dan Bernstein
Critically acclaimed, I guess.
Alex Cohen
It looks turgid and heavy and.
Dan Bernstein
Well, no, it looks very heavy and dark. But for some reason, my gut is just saying no. I mean, I'm gonna see it. I'll probably see it really close to opening. Opening nights. I'll go early on, but I'll just.
Alex Cohen
I will never forget my sophomore English teacher, bless him, Mr. Horton, when he taught the Odyssey at Deerfield High School.
Dan Bernstein
The Elliot and the Odyssey.
Alex Cohen
When Mr. Horton, he was the best. And Mr. Orton, he sits there and you're talking about it. He's writing the characters on the chalkboard and he goes, listen, here's the thing you have to know first before we dive into this. They're all gay.
Dan Bernstein
Okay. That's how it started.
Alex Cohen
Yes. That's how he taught it. And we were like, what? Remember, this was. This is 1985. So just. Just remember. Just keep that in mind that everybody's gay. Okay, then why does he want to get back home to Penelope?
Dan Bernstein
Maybe it's not Penelope. He's trying to get back home.
Alex Cohen
Right. Like I didn't appreciate it at the time when he said it, and I didn't know that it was maybe not a widely accepted interpretation. Damn woke public high schools. We got to get the woke out of the public high schools. They're corrupting young minds like mine. I could have been a normal alpha, red blooded American with wraparound sunglasses and wearing a fishing shirt to work. Wait a second here. Hold on a second here. I don't know. It's not. It's not my. Do you want me to wear the other fishing shirt at some point?
Dan Bernstein
Yes, I've asked you multiple times. Well, no, you should wear the day because I'm going to stay down terror one day with you and go fishing. I want you to wear it that day.
Alex Cohen
The bite's weird right now.
Dan Bernstein
I don't even. No, no, I'm not today. No, no.
Alex Cohen
I'm just saying.
Dan Bernstein
No, I'm not.
Alex Cohen
Only got one yesterday on a net.
Dan Bernstein
No, but when we go fishing together, I want you to wear that because
Alex Cohen
then you have a bass pond in your front yard.
Dan Bernstein
I know I'm not, but I want to do it.
Alex Cohen
I want to come up to you.
Dan Bernstein
No, because I want to walk around and I want. I want you to wear that shirt. And I'll wear the one that makes me look like a. A convict going for his hearing over zoom.
American Express Announcer
Yes.
Dan Bernstein
Yes, I'll wear that with my white, white socks.
Alex Cohen
And you can meet my people.
Dan Bernstein
You can meet the other people. That's what I want to do.
Alex Cohen
Like all. All of the ne' er do wells and all.
Dan Bernstein
I'm not climbing rocks. I'm not dodging birds. I mean, we can stay where it's.
Alex Cohen
I'm still getting over the bird attack injury, by the way. I have an intramuscular hematoma. From the bird attack.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, like, you got like a big marble.
Alex Cohen
It's like a knot in the. In the muscle in the side of my. Of my thigh. It doesn't hurt. I know. It'll go. Whether my leg will go away?
Dan Bernstein
No. The marvel.
Alex Cohen
All right, so you're kind of in between on the Odyssey too, right?
Dan Bernstein
You're just like, well, I'm definitely gonna see it, but I'm just not sure if I'm gonna enjoy it.
Alex Cohen
I'm not definitely gonna see it.
Dan Bernstein
My gut's telling me, no, I'm not that.
Alex Cohen
Like, that looks like an ass buster. How long is that?
Dan Bernstein
I don't Know, but I wanna watch it. If I'm gonna see it, I wanna see it in the theater. I don't wanna watch it on my TV.
Alex Cohen
That's our running time here, 172 minutes.
Dan Bernstein
So that's over two hours, right? Oh, that's. Oh, that's almost three hours. That's two buckets of popcorn.
Alex Cohen
That's a big day.
Dan Bernstein
That's a big commitment.
Alex Cohen
That's a lot of good and plenty is what that is.
Dan Bernstein
I'll do it. No, I'll do it. I just don't know if I'm gonna enjoy it or if it's good or it's worth it.
Alex Cohen
What I want to see. Every time I see one of the trailers, one of the scenes, all I want is the outtakes. You know, I want all of these, like, heavily clad guys with the brushes on their helmets. And then, like, Matt Damon's phone rings or something.
Dan Bernstein
Oh.
Alex Cohen
Oh, sorry, Sorry. Or like you used to see that one shot of Game of Thrones where there's a Starbucks cup underneath the table. Yeah, I love that. I love those anachronisms where you could tell, like, in between scenes, she was having her lodging. Okay, here we go.
Dan Bernstein
Wait. So help me out here with the Greek history. So there was the movie Troy that Brad Pitt was in.
Alex Cohen
Yes.
Dan Bernstein
And he played Achilles.
Alex Cohen
Okay, I didn't see that either.
Dan Bernstein
That detailed, obviously. The Battle of Troy.
Alex Cohen
Okay, so Troy.
Dan Bernstein
So the Odyssey picks up after the Battle of Troy with Odysseus getting home. Right. Isn't that what it's. Isn't that the.
Alex Cohen
It's after the Trojan War, Chronological timeline. The Trojan War has ended, and this is his trip home.
Dan Bernstein
Okay, but that's how.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, because she's. There are people coming after Penelope, like, hey, he's dead. He's. He's gone. Have a little of this.
Dan Bernstein
Right?
Alex Cohen
What do you think of this? No, I will wait for my husband. They'll get Matt Damon home.
Dan Bernstein
Because the Battle of Troy was years long. Right. Years and years long. And it finally ended with the Trojan horse. Correct. Am I remembering this? All correct.
Alex Cohen
How long? I don't. I don't know how long it took.
American Express Announcer
I know.
Alex Cohen
I think the Trojan horse was. Was a part of it. I don't know if that ended everything when they thought it ended it.
Dan Bernstein
Maybe it didn't.
Alex Cohen
How stupid do you have to be for that, too? Yeah, like, we have a gift for you.
Dan Bernstein
It's a big wooden horse on wheels. I mean, like, what the fuck would you do with that, first of all?
Alex Cohen
Well, that's why? When in Holy Grail, when they have the giant rabbit.
Dan Bernstein
Rabbit.
Alex Cohen
And then they're like, now what happens now? We will jump out of the rabbit. What now? Now that we've sneaked in, we'll jump out of the rabbit. We're not in the rabbit.
American Express Announcer
Damn it.
Alex Cohen
I don't know how long it was, okay, but, yeah, that's the story. You've declared that you're in.
Dan Bernstein
I'm definitely in. All right, wait, but. So the movie Troy with Brad Pitt, this isn't. It's not a pickup of this story?
Alex Cohen
No, they're not a different movie. They're not related. It's a different movie.
Dan Bernstein
Yes.
Alex Cohen
Did that movie do well?
Dan Bernstein
I don't know what that mean. That was Brad Pitt, Eric Banya, Diane Krueger, Orlando Bloom, Sean Bean, Rose Byrne, Brendan Gleason, who is going to play the University of Illinois head coach. What's his name?
Alex Cohen
Brad Underwood.
Dan Bernstein
Brad Underwood, Yeah.
Alex Cohen
I said. I said. Yeah. With 10% Chris Cooper, 90% Brendan Gleason, 10% Chris Cooper.
Dan Bernstein
Brian Cox was in that. I mean, that's also quite a. The cast.
Alex Cohen
And now he tells you about McMuffins.
Dan Bernstein
That's right.
Alex Cohen
It's a great job.
Dan Bernstein
Who directed this one? Oh, that was Wolfgang Peterson.
Alex Cohen
Okay.
Dan Bernstein
Okay, so this is not like a pickup of.
Alex Cohen
No, this is. This is a Christopher Nolan joint, as it were. All right. You're. You're. You've declared that you're. No, I'm in.
Progressive Insurance Announcer
I'm in.
Dan Bernstein
I just. I'm uncertain about it, though. I'm convinced, because it's. That's a big summer movie you need to see on the big screen. Yeah. With the seats that vibrate and move and stuff. The IMAX thing.
Alex Cohen
I make my seat vibrate myself.
Dan Bernstein
I always get. I always pick the seat that. The recliner thing doesn't work as well. You know, they recline all. You could get really cozy.
Alex Cohen
I like going to regular, like, you
Dan Bernstein
know, you don't recline at all. You don't put your feet.
Alex Cohen
I like the seats at the Logan.
Dan Bernstein
I don't know what the Logan is.
Alex Cohen
Logan Theater in. It's Milwaukee Avenue, you know.
Dan Bernstein
Is it Chicago?
Alex Cohen
Logan Square.
Dan Bernstein
Okay. Why are they just like regular old movie theaters? They're leather.
Alex Cohen
They redid an old theater. They completely red.
Dan Bernstein
They don't recline, though, but they lean.
Alex Cohen
But, yeah, they do. They kind of bounce.
Dan Bernstein
Okay. No, so the. Like, you go to the AMC and you. There's a button. Yeah, it's like you're. It's like a lazy boy at Home.
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
I'm sorry. Wait, what.
Progressive Insurance Announcer 2
What.
Dan Bernstein
What airlines do you fly on that they recline? Yeah.
Alex Cohen
They don't anymore, right? They used to.
Dan Bernstein
When's the last time you flew and
Alex Cohen
you're not supposed to do even if they can't?
Dan Bernstein
Last year together. Yeah. It wasn't that long ago that you flew.
Alex Cohen
Well, I mean, business class. They. They recline all the way flat.
Dan Bernstein
Well, yeah, but.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, okay, whatever. What do you mean?
Dan Bernstein
Nothing.
Alex Cohen
It's so you can sleep. It becomes a bed, and then. Neatest life that you live, and then they. Then they bring by a private jet. I am too, now that I think about it. Where is mine?
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. Why didn't Bruce have one?
Alex Cohen
A private jet.
Dan Bernstein
H. Bruce, where's your private jet?
Alex Cohen
Yeah, that would have been cool.
Dan Bernstein
Private jet while mom's got the station wagon with the heaters in it.
Alex Cohen
No, no. Capri's Classic. We never had a. We never had a station wagon.
Dan Bernstein
I just pictured with a station wagon with a paneling on the side.
Alex Cohen
We never had one of those.
Dan Bernstein
Smoke coming out.
Alex Cohen
We never had to know. We always had it.
Dan Bernstein
We had a.
Alex Cohen
We had a Buick Regal. We had Caprice Classics one after the other.
Dan Bernstein
Those are the old cop cars, right?
Alex Cohen
Yeah, yeah. Big Pav 8. Big piece of American steel, built like a tank. Oh, yeah, yeah. Big green one, too. Went to pea green.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, seriously?
Alex Cohen
Oh, yeah, yeah. Big old one. Time I remember that he got it at a Chevy dealer in the middle of downtown Highland Park. I forgot the name. It's long gone. And he's like, kids, come with me. We're gonna pick up our new car. And we come. We pick up the new car, and the salesman's all excited and he brings it.
Dan Bernstein
What year is this?
Alex Cohen
Oh, this had to be 78.
Dan Bernstein
Okay.
Alex Cohen
And he brings it around, and it was like, worse green than this. Like a puke green color. And my dad goes, that's the wrong color. And the salesman like, no, it's not. This is the color you wanted.
Dan Bernstein
What, the two door?
Alex Cohen
No, four door. Four door. And he said, metallic mint green. And he's like, no, that's not the color. And no, no, like, that's blue. Like, this was.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, this is green.
Alex Cohen
Okay. No, no, but no, no, no, this was. And he said, you know, my dad said, you know what? Don't worry about it. Fine.
Dan Bernstein
Seriously?
Alex Cohen
Yeah. Oh, I think they knocked a bunch of the cost down. I think he's like, well, I'm not paying.
Dan Bernstein
What?
Alex Cohen
You know, that's not the color I asked for. And they're like, this is your car. So I think they renegotiated and it was our car for a while. It was fine.
Dan Bernstein
Very nice.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, it was fine. But actually, yeah, it. Maybe it was more like this than I'm giving you credit for. This is probably pretty close to what it looked like. And if you're, if you're listening and not watching when I'm saying this, I'm looking at my ugly shirt that I got for same reason. And I got it as a knockdown because nobody else bought it. And then I could get this one on clearance. That's what I got. Clarence.
Dan Bernstein
Gross. Yeah.
Alex Cohen
Yeah. But it was. Yeah. Big Caprice classic and then it became basically a rolling ashtray.
American Express Announcer
All right.
Dan Bernstein
Is that, is that closer to the color?
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
Really? Oh, that's nasty.
Alex Cohen
Not quite that. Yeah, Maybe a little lighter. Maybe a little more chartreusey. Yeah, it's gross. If you look whatever colors GM had available. 78 and 79.
Dan Bernstein
Yep, that's really ugly.
Alex Cohen
Maybe, maybe.
Dan Bernstein
I hope you got a good deal on that. That's.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, I do too.
Dan Bernstein
Really gross.
Alex Cohen
That was that you don't show up at your house or carpool. You knew it was time for school.
Dan Bernstein
My mom had a similar color car when I was in the 80s. It was a Dodge, some big hunky Dodge four door thing. It was a nasty green color.
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
And the interior was that green pleather. Oh, was it bad?
Alex Cohen
Was it bench.
Dan Bernstein
Oh, bench seat. Yes, absolutely.
Alex Cohen
Oh, sure, bench.
Dan Bernstein
I remember my. So my dad had one of the. The paneled, side paneled station wagons and I used to. I, I would literally lay on the dashboard.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, sure. That's.
Dan Bernstein
It was probably to get away from the smoke.
Alex Cohen
We didn't wear seatbelts.
Dan Bernstein
The smoke would come back and so I would.
Alex Cohen
Oh yeah. We didn't wear seatbel Ever, ever, ever.
Dan Bernstein
And it had that, that seat in the very back that would fold down.
Alex Cohen
Way back.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. And way, way, way back. And then you could put the window down.
Alex Cohen
Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
On the station wagon and we were like half hanging out of it.
Alex Cohen
Yes. Yeah, it's the way back. Yeah.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah. I don't know what kind of. What's that seat called? What's that. That's a special name for that seat.
Alex Cohen
The way back.
Dan Bernstein
No, that's not the technical name for it.
Alex Cohen
For the back seat of a station wagon. Yeah, the one that faces the opposite direction. The way back.
Dan Bernstein
There's a name for it. Yeah, I know what you're. I've heard you. I've three times you said it.
Alex Cohen
I didn't Call it anything else.
Dan Bernstein
Well, that's just what you called it as a kid. The way back.
Alex Cohen
Everybody calls it that. I don't know anybody that didn't call it get in the back or get in the way back. What is it called? The third seat probably. Or the third row. Third row seating, back bench. I don't know what it's called. I know what I called it. Biatch.
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Alex Cohen
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Dan Bernstein
Here you go.
Alex Cohen
Ready?
Dan Bernstein
Ready.
Alex Cohen
You got a pen? Dbu. There you go. Those three letters just for Dan Bernstein. Unfiltered. And you use that when you sign up and when you register. And that will help you claim an exclusive offer from my bookie. The World cup turns every match into a conversation. My bookie lets you turn that opinion into action. Back your side before the kickoff. Follow the match live. Stay locked in from the opening whistle to the final kick. The World cup only comes around once every four years. So don't just watch it from the sidelines. Get in on the action at my bookie. Must be 21 plus. Please gamble responsibly. Yes. It's the way back, isn't it?
Dan Bernstein
Well, it's universally called the way back or the backpack. Yeah, I know, but that's not the.
Alex Cohen
You hate it when I'm right. You hate it when I'm right.
Dan Bernstein
I do not. I like when you're right. No, I like it when you're right, Dan.
Alex Cohen
I do when I'm right. Just like at home rarely happens. And hates it when I'm right. So I do the I'm right dance, and then they kick me out. They actually. Cause, you know, I get in trouble for singing at home.
Dan Bernstein
I say, I don't mind the singing. The singing doesn't bother me.
Alex Cohen
So, like, you know, I'll say, like, here comes Zoe. She's coming down the stairs. Where is she going? Probably to leave the house for work. And then she'll throw something at me. And she's like, well, you don't do this at work. I said, yes, I do.
Dan Bernstein
Yeah, but it doesn't bother me.
Alex Cohen
So I do it.
Dan Bernstein
Like the other day, I don't care.
Alex Cohen
I made up the Liz is getting coffee song because I. I do the singing, too.
Dan Bernstein
And we were driving back from Indy and Hank screamed at me to shut up.
Alex Cohen
Oh.
Dan Bernstein
Because I. I wouldn't stop singing.
Alex Cohen
That's a mistake. Oh, driver in Miami. When you wouldn't stop singing.
Dan Bernstein
Yes, I was, but I was doing opera version of opera versions of things. Singing operatic. And then at one point, I was singing while doing this. While singing. Good for singing, though.
Alex Cohen
Good for you.
Dan Bernstein
And he screamed at the top of his lunch.
Alex Cohen
Yeah, I. I was gonna get us in trouble when the story about the B52 crashing. Did you see that?
Dan Bernstein
I didn't.
Alex Cohen
An actual B52 crash.
Dan Bernstein
But were the B52s on it while they were crashing?
Alex Cohen
Here we go, falling out of the sky, and we're all going to die.
Dan Bernstein
Yep.
Alex Cohen
I've got me a plane. It's as big as a whale. And the engines just failed.
Dan Bernstein
Yep, that's it. That's what we need. I think your family needs to hear those songs and hear that story tonight.
Alex Cohen
I can't. I can't. I cannot be expected to read a story about a B52 crash and not think about Fred Schneider.
Dan Bernstein
See, that's what frightens me, because when you read the headline out loud to me, that's immediately what I did.
Alex Cohen
So, like the radio call, they're getting them the mayday, mayday. We're all going down, down, down, down. That is Dan Bernstein, Unfiltered, brought to you in partnership with my bookie, Dan Bernstein.
Dan Bernstein
Unfiltered.
Alex Cohen
Unfiltered.
Mark McCray
On three.
Dan Bernstein
One, two.
Mark McCray
Sports.
Alex Cohen
With networks like Fox News, cnn, Ms. Now, and more, Sling is the best way to get the news you care about, which is great for everyone. Well, almost everyone. Where's that dang paper boy.
Dan Bernstein
I need my news outdated and rolled
Alex Cohen
up like a burrito. Finally.
Dan Bernstein
Now I can read all about what happened forever ago.
Alex Cohen
Get the most important news delivered reliably at the best price. Sling lets you do that? Visit sling.comnews to see your offer.
Podcast: Dan Bernstein Unfiltered
Host: Dan Bernstein with Alex Cohen and Mark McCray
Episode Date: June 16, 2026
Dan Bernstein returns with longtime producer Alex Cohen (assisted by Mark McCray) to dig into the changing Chicago Bulls landscape with the hiring of new head coach Tiago Splitter. The hosts also dissect a key White Sox-Yankees series in New York, reflect on league-wide baseball issues (including the Giants’ Pride Night scandal), discuss baseball’s statistical leaders, and roam from Cookie Monster’s Chicago connections to summer movie speculation and childhood car rides. As always, it’s a lively, unfiltered tour of Chicago sports and beyond.
Spring Cleaning for the Bulls
Splitter’s Worldly Background and Character
Coaching Communication: From Donovan to Splitter
Trivia and NBA Coaching Height Tangent
All-Star Caliber Talent on Both Sides
Baseball Nostalgia & Personal Memories
New Approach, New Pitch Mix
Stats vs. Traditional Metrics
Behind the Scenes: What Changed?
Context:
MLB Steps In:
Local Journalism Spotlight:
Broader Discussion:
This lively and wide-ranging episode delivers in-depth, smart, and sometimes irreverent Chicago sports commentary. Expect emotional fandom, smart baseball analytics, tough social commentary, and insightful pop culture riffs—all with the characteristic banter, humor, and authenticity that loyal Dan Bernstein listeners expect.
For full context and a healthy dose of Chicago flavor, this episode goes well beyond box scores—unpacking sports culture, leadership, and the random weirdness that makes Bernstein’s show a Chicago classic.