Chicago Will Never Forgive Dan Bernstein for This Top 10 List

Summary

Dan Bernstein Unfiltered

Episode: Chicago Will Never Forgive Dan Bernstein for This Top 10 List

Date: July 17, 2026
Host: Dan Bernstein
Co-host: Matt Abbatacola
Podcast Network: 312 Sports

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Episode Overview

This episode is a classic Bernstein feedback-palooza, blending razor-sharp listener interactions and Chicago sports deep-cuts with signature banter. Dan and Matt kick things off with their acclaimed “Friday Feedback Friday” section, showcasing listener emails, stories, and tangents that range from baseball trivia to mythological monsters. The episode’s centerpiece is Dan's long-teased, sure-to-be-controversial "Top 10 Worst Chicago Baseball All-Stars (Since 1969)" list, celebrating the dubious feats of the Cubs and White Sox faithful’s most forgettable Midsummer Classic honorees.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Friday Feedback Friday: Emails, Banter, and Cyclops Athletics

[01:14–13:37]

• Listener Engagement: Dan reads and riffs on a variety of emails—ranging from a bizarre Indiana arson story (via a self-amputated body part), to a digression about Komodo dragons, baseball road trips, and “accidental text on purpose” etiquette a la Larry David. (see highlights below)
• Listener Dom in Michigan: Makes a clever parallel between a Cubs beat writer’s texting blunder and TV’s Curb Your Enthusiasm, noting, “That's an accidental text by accident, which is somehow the more advanced form” (09:16).
• Lineage, nostalgia, and sodas: Anthony, a longtime listener, credits Dan for a shout-out to Canfield's Soda, triggering a trip down memory lane. "Your voice was comforting on a horrific day," writes Anthony, referencing 9/11 (11:52).

2. Tangents & Trophy Talk: From World Cup to Fiesta Bowl

[13:48–18:24]

• Trophies in Sports: The duo and listeners debate the grandeur (or lack thereof) of various sports trophies, including the World Cup’s understated design vs. the over-the-top Fiesta Bowl trophy. Listener Sam describes the latter as “a hernia waiting to happen” (16:05).

3. The Great Cyclops Athlete Debate

[18:24–35:03]

• Multiple listeners respond to a previous episode's hypothetical: would the Cyclops make a great pro athlete?
  • Lucas rebuts the idea, arguing a Cyclops would be doomed in most American team sports, memorably positing:
    "I disagree with your assertion that the famed Cyclops would be a great athlete to the point of requiring professional leagues to institute rules to limit or ban their roster eligibility. They have no depth perception. You can't shoot a jumper or hit a major league fastball with no depth perception." (32:27)
  • Dan and Matt are both entertained and bewildered by how seriously the audience took this hypothetical.
    • Dan: "The fact that this was taken seriously..." (35:03)
    • Matt: "There were so many emails ... a lot of time" (35:06).

4. Baseball Front Office Grievances & Chicago Family Ties

[22:23–25:48]

• White Sox Nepotism: Listener Tim fears recent White Sox draft picks are more about family connections than baseball sense, a recurring theme in the franchise's history.
  • Dan agrees, “There’s always been a familial aspect to the White Sox ... that's one of the things for which [Jerry] Reinsdorf ... has been praised as being sort of old fashioned and warm in that regard.”

5. Lighthearted Feedback: Drinking Habits and "Score on the Fours"

[28:13–32:27]

• Listener theorizing about why Packers fans drink less at games—Dan enjoys the “Friday Feedback Friday Feedback Friday” recursion.
• Matt tells the story of being misinterpreted by Murph due to his malfunctioning pinky being misread as a three-and-a-half fingered signal.

6. Movie and Pop Culture Feedback

[35:54–37:04]

• Mixed reviews on the movie “Odyssey”; the saga of Christopher Nolan fans' outrage after Dan admits to barely watching his movies.
  • Matt: “Apparently there's a large Christopher Nolan fan club that I've offended.” (36:31)

7. Where Are They Now? — Paul Edinger Edition

[44:14–44:56]

• Field reporting from the “Strangles Federation” tracks the post-Bears journey of quirky kicker Paul Edinger.
  • “After all this time, I found Paul Edinger. He has emerged from the Bears kicking wilderness, and he appears to be doing just fine.” (42:49)
  • Edinger reportedly coaches in Florida and works as an area manager for Southern Glazer’s Wine and Spirits.

8. The Main Event: Top 10 Worst Chicago MLB All-Star Seasons Since 1969

[45:34–61:54]

The Ground Rules

• Based on Dan's lifetime (post-1969).
• Considers “worst players or worst seasons by a player who nonetheless became an All-Star”—not always the “worst” guys, but most questionable All-Star resumes, based on season-end advanced stats like WAR and wRC+.
• Honorable Mentions: 2014 Starlin Castro, 1988 Vance Law, 2013 Travis Wood, 1984 Richard Dotson, 2025 Shane Smith.

The Countdown

| Rank | Player, Year/Team | Stats / Reason | |------|-------------------------------|----------------| | 10 | Scott Podsednik, 2005 White Sox | 1.9 WAR, wRC+ 80 – Voted in by special ballot; “big home run, but luck is part of baseball” (47:08) | | 9 | Steve Trachsel, 1996 Cubs | 1.6 WAR – “Major League All Star Steve Trachsel” (49:26) | | 8 | Joe Girardi, 2000 Cubs | 1.7 WAR, wRC+ 83 – “Catchers can be weird…” (49:55) | | 7 | Kosuke Fukudome, 2008 Cubs | 1.4 WAR, wRC+ 91 – Celebrated debut, fizzled out (50:37) | | 6 | Bucky Dent, 1975 White Sox | 1.2 WAR, wRC+ 78 – “Those are barely bench players” (52:21) | | 5 | Manny Trillo, 1977 Cubs | 1.0 WAR, wRC+ 83 | | 4 | Bryan LaHair, 2012 Cubs | 0.6 WAR, wRC+ 110 – “Literal FanGraphs category: ‘scrub’” (55:07) | | 3 | Steve Swisher, 1976 Cubs | 0.5 WAR, wRC+ 61 – “Those were All-Star numbers!” (56:33) | | 2 | Ed Farmer, 1980 White Sox | 0.1 WAR, 4.88 K/9, 5.06 BB/9 – “More walks than strikeouts and he was an All-Star!” (57:49) | | 1 | Jerry Morales, 1977 Cubs | -0.4 WAR, wRC+ 103, but 23.6 runs below average defensively – “An All-Star with a negative wins above replacement” (58:51) |

• Dan's Reaction (on Morales):
  “He was below replacement level....and yet he was an All Star. So I placed him number one on my list.” (59:51)

Guidelines & Perspective (From Matt):

• Per FanGraphs, 0–1 WAR: scrub; 1–2 WAR: role/bench player; 4+ WAR: typical All-Star.
• Most on Dan’s list weren’t even bench-level; a couple, like Morales and Swisher, were barely above replacement or even negative.

9. Closing Banter and Bonus Feedback

[61:54–End]

• The show closes with a shout out to Steve Ontiveros’s replica hair, another round of humorous feedback (a listener likens a gruesome news story to “a very dark episode that never aired of Everybody Loves Raymond” (62:59)), and some friendly reminders about Chicago window advertising and Harley Davidson promos.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Listener Sarcasm:
  “Please, please tell me something novel about this incident. Please. We start with sarcasm. It's my choice on that one.” (01:14, Dan Bernstein)

• On The Cyclops Hypothetical:
  “I disagree with your assertion that the famed Cyclops would be a great athlete to the point of requiring professional leagues to institute rules to limit or ban their roster eligibility. ... They have no depth perception. You can't shoot a jumper or hit a major league fastball with no depth perception.” (32:27, Listener Lucas)

• On White Sox Nepotism:
  “There's always been a familial aspect to the White Sox ... making people feel like family is one of the things Jerry Reinsdorf ... has been praised for...They've done a little bit of both and some people find that nice.” (25:49, Dan Bernstein)

• On All-Star “Scrubs”:
  “If you finish at 1.2 [WAR] you should be a bench player...not to mention, a WRC plus of 78 is 22 points below average offensive production.” (53:26, Dan Bernstein)

• On Scott Podsednik’s 2005 All-Star nod:
  “He was voted in...had a WRC plus of 80...but big home run, though...Those White Sox were one of the great postseason teams of all time.” (47:08, Dan Bernstein)

• On Steve Swisher, 1976:
  “Steve Swisher was an All Star...his WAR that season, 0.5. His WRC plus, 61.”
  Matt: “Oh my God. Are you serious?” (56:33)

• On Jerry Morales, #1 on the list:
  “He was below replacement level...an all star with negative wins above replacement. ... one of the very worst defensive players in all of baseball.” (59:51, Dan Bernstein)

• On Listener Attention to Detail:
  “The fact that this was taken seriously...” (35:03, Dan Bernstein)

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Important Timestamps

• [01:14] Show kickoff / Listener feedback begins
• [09:16] Dom, Michigan, Curb Your Enthusiasm parallel
• [11:52] Listener Anthony on Canfield’s Soda & Dan on 9/11
• [13:37] Listener trophy feedback, college trophies vs. World Cup
• [22:23] Listener Tim on White Sox nepotism, Dan’s reply
• [32:27] Listener Lucas on Cyclops athletics
• [35:03] Hosts react to Cyclops debate length
• [44:14] “Strangles Federation” and current Paul Edinger update
• [45:34] Start of "Top 10 Worst Chicago All-Star Seasons" list
• [46:05] Honorable mentions
• [47:08] #10—Scott Podsednik, 2005 White Sox
• [53:26] Matt explains WAR benchmarks
• [55:07] #4—Bryan LaHair, 2012 Cubs
• [56:33] #3—Steve Swisher, 1976 Cubs
• [57:49] #2—Ed Farmer, 1980 White Sox
• [59:51] #1—Jerry Morales, 1977 Cubs

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The Tone and Language

• Signature Chicago frankness: sardonic, self-aware, and playful
• Heavy on inside jokes, self-deprecation, and loving digs at the city’s beloved (and maligned) sports teams
• Retains the salty, long-form riffing style that longtime Bernstein listeners love

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In Short

The July 17, 2026 episode of "Dan Bernstein Unfiltered" showcases Bernstein and Abbatacola’s sharp banter, deep-rooted Chicago knowledge, and willingness to mix nostalgia with needling criticism—especially as Dan drops his “Top 10” list of the least-deserving Cubs and Sox All-Stars since 1969. Listeners, sports die-hards, and trivia nerds alike will find an entertaining stew of stories, stats, and laughs, plus the kind of feedback loop between hosts and audience that makes them a Chicago institution.

Transcript

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[Dan Bernstein]

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[Dan Bernstein]

Dan Bernstein unfiltered unfiltered on 312 sports foreign 312 and we are brought to you today by Harley Davidson Woodstock. You can check them [e-mail] and also by Chicago Window Guys. Russ Armstrong is the owner so give him a call at 847-302-9171 and check out his five star reviews at Chicago Window Guys. We are going to bring all of the Friday feedback Friday feedback to you today and I'm also going to do a top 10 list with which I had a great deal of fun. We're going to explore the worst All Stars in Chicago Major League Baseball history in my my lifetime. We're going to start with just since the 1969 season. So as long as I have been on this earth, not in it, but on it, we are going to take a look at the by my estimation the worst players or the worst seasons of some of these players to in which they ended up as All Stars. But I want to get started right away with the feedback. There's so much of it and I think I've been doing a nice job of keeping up with everything making sure I have and some of these are big, some are small, but it's stuff that I like that I find entertaining or fun or things that I want to bring. And I want to start with what was sent in by old buddy Glenn, who writes, I began the July 9th DBU podcast to hear Dan and Matt plunge into what they called the story of the year. And they related the tale of Indiana man Christopher Peden, who cut off his own penis, doused it in gasoline, and used it to set fire to his mother's garage. I listened to Dan and Matt riff speculations and impressions regarding the details of this story until finally, approximately 12 minutes in, I hear Dan say, now here's what's interesting. At this point, I told myself, finally here, I can barely keep myself awake through the retelling of yet another humdrum story of arson combustibles created through genital self excision. Please, please tell me something novel about this incident. Please. We start with sarcasm. It's my choice on that one. Here is Bottomless Monkey, where he says, formerly bottomless monkey. And he asked, do you remember how the bottomless monkey handle originated? And I told him, damn right I do. A caller who said, I'll knock the bottom out that monkey. Well, he's also Dave in Indianapolis who said, I was interested to hear you mention the Komodo dragon. And this is when we were talking about the Homo floresiensis that had been discovered, the hobbit, like creatures that feasted on the remains of elephants that had been killed and mostly eaten by Komodo dragons. Yep, he said. Douglas Adams of Hitchhiker's Guide fame wrote about the Komodo dragon nearly 40 years ago. He and his party actually traveled to the island of Komodo, where the dragons had been turned into something of a carnival attraction. They lie around in a gully all day and they wait until an audience assembled. Then they would be fed a freshly killed goat. While the audience watched, Adams described how these animals evolved little from prehistoric times, have been essentially reduced to a floor show for tourists, and a sick and queasy one at that. Which leads directly to my next and I feel very relevant question, when are the bears moving to Hammond? Thank you, Dave. Not gonna answer that, but it is much appreciated. Here's a note from Dom in Michigan. And Dom says, I'm writing this on my way to Sioux Falls for a baseball tournament to wrap our son's 13U season. And I just happened upon the Curb youb Enthusiasm episode called the Accidental Text on purpose. And this opens. There's the water. What flavor Waterloo today, Maddie?

[Matt]

Tropical fruit.

[Dan Bernstein]

Tropical fruit. Okay. Is that a Guy Fieri Collab no,

[Matt]

this is just one of the regular ones. I would have used the last root beer float that I have, but the bottom of the can bubbled. No, stand upright. Oh, and I didn't want to pour

[Dan Bernstein]

it into a glass, so you'll get to it later. Well, the accidental text on purpose opens with Larry David losing a middle seat war to a woman faking a medical condition. So here I am, crammed in coach, watching Larry fight for a seat. I'm flying to baseball, and I'm having just heard you guys dissect a baseball reporter's texting disaster. So it's a perfect sign for this Friday feedback Friday email. Larry spends the whole 38 minutes engineering one scheme to help friends send a brutally honest message. Disguise it as a slip meant for someone else and then walk away with total plausible deniability while having the recipient feel good about themselves as a way to curry their favor. He trained others how to do it, mostly successfully throughout three subplots. Bruce Levine, however, did it in one tap. No scheme, no deniability. He just fired off a private text calling the front office Twinkle D and Twinkle Dumb straight into the public timeline during the home run derby. That is not an accidental text on purpose. That's an accidental text by accident, which is somehow the more advanced form. Side note, Larry probably would have spent a full scene arguing the malapropistic use of twinkledee and twinkledum. But then Bruce broke Larry's one sacred rule. He deleted it and apologized. That's rookie stuff. Larry never breaks. You hold the line, you let everyone stew. The move is. Sorry, wrong conversation. Except Bruce's conversation unfortunately happened to be with the entire Internet. Susie Essman would have sniffed it out instantly, just like Cubs Twitter. Bruce had the perfect crime. But then he walked into the clubhouse and confessed. He became the most naturally gifted accidental texter. Larry David never trained and he wasted the gift some somewhere. And somehow over South Dakota, I felt Larry's disappointment personally. That's Dom in Michigan.

[Matt]

Nice. Yeah. I don't know if you have any feedback to share about the Odyssey, but I can. I can tell you that received a couple emails and then I've seen some things online for people I know and a text or two as well.

[Dan Bernstein]

I have two.

[Matt]

Oh, people who have seen the movie.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes.

[Matt]

And all very good reviews. Had one guy say, what a movie.

[Dan Bernstein]

I've gotten mostly good reviews.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Except my cousin did not like it.

[Matt]

Wait, which cousin?

[Dan Bernstein]

He's one of the blacks.

[Matt]

Okay. I wouldn't expect him to like it. For some reason. I don't expect you to like it. And if you ask me yesterday, I would say your cousins probably won't like it either.

[Dan Bernstein]

All I heard from him, and this was late yesterday.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because he, he knew I'd want the review. He said this is just one person's take. He said some corny ass.

[Matt]

Okay, I, I wouldn't have expected anything less. For whatever reason. I don't even know why the Chicago

[Dan Bernstein]

Tribune gave it four stars. Yeah, you know Katie Walsh, who's does a pretty good job. I'm, I'm a fan and, but you know, everybody's entitled to an opinion and I will get to those, I promise. I do have them. No worries. You know, I think it's really important to be smart about managing your finances. And that's why I believe Monarch is the app that can help you in doing so. Monarch's like having a financial advisor in your pocket. It's a personal finance app and it tracks everything that can help you take care of your financial picture, accounts, investments, saving goals and spending. Most apps only tell you what you've already spent. Monarch helps set goals, map out big purchases, and see if you're actually on track before it's too late to adjust. There's an AI weekly recap. It flags spending spikes, net worth shifts and upcoming expenses. And you can ask the AI assistant anything about your finances. How much did I spend on travel last summer? Can I afford this vacation without touching my savings? Write your own money story with Monarch. Use the code [e-mail] to get your first year of Monarch Core Half off at just 50 bucks. That's 50% off your first year at monarch.com with the code DBU. I loved getting this because it had this, this email had a little bit of everything that I like. It's from Anthony and Anthony said, dan, I agree with about 20% of what you say, but I love listening to you. I love hearing that. He said, I remember listening to you on 9 11. Your voice was comforting on a horrific day. He says, great memory on Canfield's Soda. My dad was the vice president of finance at Canfield's. It was a family company and the owners are still living. The madman behind Chocolate Fudge was their chemist, Manny. Manny created many different flavors and you made my dad's day giving Canfields a shout out. Hey. And I. And I replied, that's so cool. I was also a fan of 5050 Canfield.

[Matt]

Yeah, I like 50 50. Remember Swiss Cream too.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, straight up cream soda. 5050 was their lemon lime.

[Matt]

Yeah, that was good. I remember that too.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I remember my next door neighbor would occasionally have. She always had 50. 50. Occasionally it would smell like vodka, but

[Matt]

I don't think that was, that was meant to be that way, though. I don't know, a little doctoring maybe.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. To this day, when I smell the combination of a bourbon and Coke, it brings me right back as like a toddler to her back porch. I think that was. I might have at one point as a little kid picked up a cup and taken a sip of what I thought was Coca Cola.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

But I had a little, little more something going on in there. I remember. But yeah, Anthony, thank you for that. I, I appreciate it. It's one of my favorite things about this particular segment is that I never know what little thing or a little bit of silliness or throwaway is going to grab someone's attention enough to bring out the response.

[Matt]

Yeah. There was something this week that I thought was just a passing by comment that there was a lot more response than I was. And maybe this is what you're going to get in. I can't remember what it was though. Here.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, I'll get. There's a lot that I've seen here. But when I was talking about the Argentine goalie.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Joey said you mentioned the greatness of the Argentine goalie. Here's a little aside to the World cup and his greatness. His name is Emmy Martinez. He plays for Aston Villa of the Premier League, which happens to be my favorite club. Argentina is the defending World cup champions. And when they won the trophy and, and it was handed to Emmy, he summarily turned it sideways and began humping it. So when Aston Villa won the Europa League trophy, the second tier European competition behind Champions League, the entire team, it appeared, kept that trophy completely the hell away from Emmy Martinez. All right, so we'll be watching that. I will. I will keep an eye on it. And there was some discussion regarding trophies themselves that caused a response here from Sam. And Sam said, longtime listener, first time writer, big fan of everything you've created over the last year as a certified college football sicko, Dan's appropriately disdainful comment about the World Cup's pedestrian trophy. See, that was old Dan. Though new Dan respects the humility of it, he said it immediately brought to mind all the vastly superior prizes that grace collegiate gridirons every year in the Big Ten alone. Each fall brings contest for an axe, a miniature cannon, a leather water jug, a brass spittoon and a wooden turtle, brass sculptures of a top hat, dairy cow and prize hog, a statue of Paul Bunyan and the Land Grant trophy, which can be described only as procrastinated Boy Scout project. And he's showing me a picture of this and I'm thinking that can't be an actual trophy. Rising above all others, however, stands the grandeur of of the Fiesta bowl trophy. Each year the Fiesta bowl commissions a 4 foot tall, 285 pound trophy encrusted with $2.5 million in gold and diamonds. It weighs more than Aaron Donald and was once described as a hernia waiting to happen. This trophy cascades down four levels, starting at the bottom. An obsidian square stone empaneled with the game's previous victors supplies the base. Then four golden statues are arranged in the posture of a power clean. They in turn support what looks like a trophy unto itself with four different golden statues arranged in the posture. Excuse me for different golden statues guarding an oversized, vaguely southwestern looking Easter egg, crowning it all as a detachable golden football adorned with more than 2,000 diamonds worth by itself over $1 million. But what makes the Fiesta bowl trophy the ideal representative of this silly sport is not its majesty, but rather its insignificance. The Fiesta bowl trophy, of course, is not awarded to the national champion. It's awarded to the winner of the Fiesta Bowl. And in the modern college football landscape, that means it recognizes at best a team that's won a semifinal and more often now only a quarter final. Because since 2003, the last time the Fiesta bowl served as a national championship game, only once has the victor of the Fiesta bowl proceeded to capture the ultimate title. But that makes sense. Who needs glory when you already have all the gold? Well written, Sam. Thank you. This from Jurian who says what a surprise that you two woke social justice warriors would advocate for letting Cyclops play in our sports. I'm guessing you want us to pay for their monocular vision affirming care too. Give me a break. Libtards.

[Genevieve]

Thank you.

[Dan Bernstein]

And in that vein, and this has been a recurring theme and I am thinking that because this is a weekly segment in which you, the listener react, or the viewer on YouTube react to what you've seen and heard, it is reminding us of something from our shared past. Maybe not should, maybe this is new to you. But if you want to hear a familiar voice, if you want to hear government fromage who has emerged with a voice message, who at the end of it had to work his way out of a little copyright trap that he set for himself and I appreciate him doing that and being aware of that potentially some intellectual property concerns. I think this is. This will warm your heart. As we head into the weekend,

[Government Fromage]

this nugget goes out to Dan Bernstein and to Matt about a cola. Yesterday's discussion about the Odyssey brought about the conversation about Odysseus and the cyclops and what did Odysseus do to the cyclops? Which of course led us to the conversation that Odysseus blinded the cyclops. To which Matt said, well, he blinded him with love. At no point did Dan Bernstein come back with, no, Matt. He blinded him with science. This led to a pick apart of the toto song Africa and the overuse of syllables for Serengeti and Kilimanjaro. So Sequoia. I don't want to possibly get into someone's trademarked thing. So Dan Bernstein, what the crap?

[Dan Bernstein]

He's like, wait a second, how do I bring this thing home?

[Matt]

Yes, yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

But there it was. If the. That warm the cockles of your heart to hear from government fromage coining the name of a new bit and thank you for it. The cyclops was a subject of all kinds of responses here. Brian says, hey, Dan. Oh, this is. This is on a different subject here. I'm gonna. I'll save the. The Cyclops and the Odyssey stuff. He says, Dan. Sorry to be that guy. No, you're not. Don't lie to me, Brian. Dan, you presented your idea to grow hops along the brick outfield wall at Wrigley Field. As awesome as your idea is it, it would be impossible to pull off. The ivy currently covering the outfield wall is mostly Boston ivy and Virginia creeper. They cling to brick and stone using adhesive disc like tendrils. Hops vines, on the other hand, are twining vines. They spiral around support such as trellises, posts, wires, etc. And would require an additional support system to be designed and installed. I highly doubt both Twinkle D and Twinkle Dumb would want to spend the dough in order to. Oh, sorry, that last part was intended for someone else. Thank you, Brian. That was cleverly done and much appreciated. This was. This is another Glenn who says, I can't believe that you didn't realize when you were doing the story about the Wrigley Field groundskeeper and you were talking about your idea that the groundskeepers named Graham Flora. Also, if the cubs are already making their own honey, they can make proprietary mead. Oh, that's true. Distilled meadow mead.

[Matt]

You.

[Dan Bernstein]

You can make a. An alcoholic beverage out of honey. No, thank you on that one. I'm good. You ever tried Mead?

[Matt]

I have. I'm good.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes. I as. As am I. I. There's no question. I think I am absolutely fine about that. Here's Tim and Tim says As a White Sox fan I was intrigued by Chris Getz's comment about Rock Chalowski's character after being selected first overall. As as a fan, I hope Rock's a superstar and make us proud. I'm not a scout. I never met the kid. I have no idea. The comment gets made about people saying they didn't need to see him play to endorse the pick that got my White Sox spidey sense up. It's happened too many times over the last 40 years as a Sox fan to not make me think certain voices aren't weighing in on baseball decisions that could stop this latest rebuild. Like all the others, so close yet so far from the finish line. Who would be so entitled, so modern baseball stupid and empowered to make such a statement? My thought was the the chairman and his buddy Tony La Russa. It actually sounds like them to say that or some other White Sox voice from the past that hangs on and weighs in on baseball decisions. It can be anyone. It could be those two. It could be Harold Baines or Ron Kittle or some other first round picks. Dad, I'm terrified. Those guys are people like them are still weighing in on decisions and that brings me to my next point. Like Rock Chalowski, I hope Landon told me is a star. Maybe he will be. But is trading a guy on your major league roster of a first place team for a draft pick and using the pick to select the son of a former star and current team ambassador in the most White Sox thing I've seen in a long time. Like most Sox fans when they hired Chris Getz, I about lost my mind and assume more of the same. I withdrew. I did other things. I vowed to not get emotionally invested in the White Sox again until there was an ownership change. But like Michael Corleone said, when I thought I was out, they pull me back in. The team is fun, they play hard, they're making baseball decisions the right way. I find myself tuning in more than not. Putting up with a bad play by play and enjoying White Sox baseball for the first time in years. But in the back of my mind I still think they're the White Sox and they'll mess it up. I hope I'm wrong. I hope they Getz was just gushing about his shiny new toy. I hope Landon told me is just a more athletic version of his old man. But his comment and the selection of Tomy reminded me the Sox still have a long way to go in this fan's mind from getting the benefit of the doubt. Old wounds heal. I'm still waiting for a strike to ruin their season, their DH to quit because they won't let his 12 year old son hang out in the clubhouse. Or for them to hire a geriatric drunk to manage his team ready to win. I guess until that happens, all I can do is enjoy the ride. Thanks guys. Tim? Yeah, in, in my response to him, it I, I, I said it's, it's still a family that the White Sox make odd draft picks and they waste draft picks because they can. And this goes back to Ron Shuler drafting his daughter.

[Matt]

Remember that?

[Dan Bernstein]

They also used a pick on a, on some kid from New Trier or wherever he was, some late round pick on someone who wasn't a prospect just so they could say some kid could say he was drafted by the White Sox. There's always, there's always a family aspect to the Sox and what I said was, I mean look at it currently they're one of their reporters. Brooke Fletcher is Scott Fletcher's daughter. Scott Fletcher the shortstop for the 1983 White Sox and and friend of Tony La Russa and Jerry Reinsdorf and Brook Fletcher's sister is Mrs. Gordon Beckham. So there, there, there's always been a, an insular and familial aspect to the White Sox and that, that making people family and making people feel like family is one of the things for which Jerry Reinsdorf in some circles has been praised as being sort of old fashioned and, and warm in that regard in ways that other more cold blooded organizations are all business. All business, all business. They, they've done a little bit of both and some people find that nice. Maybe to some extent it is that's all here is different Tim a lot of similar names today he says all right boys, I want to respond with a counter theory to one of the items on the last Friday Feedback Friday which makes this a Friday Feedback Friday Feedback Friday somebody emailed in surprised at first that Green Bay was one of the lowest ranked teams in terms of home fans, alcohol consumption in stadium as well as pre gaming. The theory by the emailer was that Green Bay fans are just too stupid to understand how surveys work. I want to be clear that I want that to be true, but I think I have a better competing theory and here it is. Being a Packers fan in Green Bay or even Wisconsin is not a male dominated thing because there isn't shit to do there. Women represent a higher percentage of fans in Green Bay than the average team. You see that in the demographic data for home game attendance where Green Bay ranks sixth in percentage of female attendance at home games. Women are smarter than men even in Green Bay. I guess they don't binge drink at the same velocity as we dumbass men. And because more women go to Green Bay games than average, and because of Green Bay culture specifically, games tend to be a family affair rather than a bunch of dude friends going to the game together and acting like ass clowns. Again, I want the other theory to be true. I just don't think it is. I think more women means less dumbass behavior. Okay, I don't think that's invalid. I don't don't let managing your money be scary. Don't let it be intimidating because it's not. I think having intelligent control of your finances and your investments is really important and I believe Monarch can help you in doing so. Monarch is an app that functions like a financial advisor in your pocket. And as you get older and more people are relying on you to do this right, Monarch helps you do it. Helps you hit savings goals or a net worth milestone. Helps you realize when a large percentage of your income is going somewhere unexpected. I love the fact that Monarch lets you compare your investments to the Benchmark S&P 500. Most apps are going to tell you what you've already spent event. Monarch helps you set goals and map out big purchases and see if you're actually on track before it's too late to adjust so you can write your own money story with Monarch. Use the code [e-mail] to get your first year of Monarch Core Half off at just $50. That's 50% off your first year at monarch.com with the code DBU. This is yet a third Tim who says earlier this week, boys, you discussed the Cubs use of hand signals to determine if Craig Counsel should challenge a call on the field. And those were 1. Don't challenge because they got it right. 5. Definitely challenge because it's going to get overturned. And then there was three up, which means maybe it'll get overturned. Your call and three down, which is maybe it'll get overturned, but the coin flip's probably going to go in the other direction. And you asked why not use two or four? Matt, why didn't you jump in to point out that using four fingers can go sideways on you? Yeah, that's true because I thought of the story that you've always told when Murph missed a score on the fours or claimed to because he said that he thought that Matt was giving him a signal of three and a half due to his broken pinky finger.

[Matt]

Yep. True story actually happened. He skipped the scores on the fours. Fred was confused. I was confused. My arm was tired. And his explanation was, you gave me three and a half, which is this right here.

[Dan Bernstein]

Which was a lie.

[Matt]

So there's my. So there's my pinky finger that doesn't straighten. So that's what I was holding up. And he saw three and a half.

[Dan Bernstein]

I still want that particular. And I know you went to some. Some like unaccredited hospital to get your finger fixed or you had like a local witch doctor do it. But the story only works if that finger allows you to impart a special spin on a baseball that makes you unhittable.

[Matt]

It helps my golf grip, that's for sure.

[Dan Bernstein]

Does it?

[Matt]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

How so?

[Matt]

Does it keep my fingers. My pinkies are my. My pointer and my pinky locked into.

[Genevieve]

Better.

[Matt]

It just. It fits better.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I get. Yeah, I can see that.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Genevieve]

All right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I'm just glad that there's.

[Matt]

I can't straighten it out and get lazy with it. So it stays in there. But yeah. So four and a half. Where's it at? There we go. Four and a half. And a half for three and a half. Sorry.

[Dan Bernstein]

So there it is. Lucas writes to say, gentlemen, I disagree with your assertion that the famed Cyclops would be a great athlete to the point of requiring professional leagues to institute rules to limit or ban their roster eligibility. Can I read that sentence again?

[Matt]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

That only here. Get a sentence like this be sent in. In is. I disagree with your assertion and that the famed Cyclops would be a great athlete to the point of requiring professional leagues to institute rules to limit or ban their roster eligibility. That sentence has never been written before. They have no depth perception. You can't shoot a jumper or hit a major league fastball with no depth perception. Let's take this by sport. Baseball is a no full stop. You can't hit, you can't catch without depth perception. I doubt you can pitch effectively either. That's out basketball. Definitely no offensive skills. Besides setting screens. You can make the argument a Cyclops can be a good rim protector. But with the speed of today's game, I don't know if you'd be very effective. Wemby would dominate him one on one hockey. The only hope is Cyclops in goal taking up the full net. But he's from Greece. They don't have ice there. Even if his job is to just sit there, he'll end up sliding around and exposing the net a little bit. Again, no depth perception. Can't track a puck. Football, maybe he could be an offensive tackle. But you can't protect your quarterback's blind side if you have your own blind side. The premier edges would have a field day going around to cyclops, and he's too huge to put in the interior because then your quarterback can't see the field. I think his ceiling would be a special teams guy with the specific function of field goal blocker or defensive tackle. Run stuffing, defensive tackle. But he'd be highly susceptible to pre snap adjustments and play action or misdirection. And then finally soccer. He said, the World Cup's almost over. Nobody cares. I'll skip it. There are probably some Olympic style sports a cyclops would excel at, like rowing, archery, or sharpshooting, because you really only use one eye in those. But I think the lack of depth perception and a large lumbering frame would be far too significant a handicap to make a cyclops an effective athlete, at least within American team sports.

[Matt]

I think it was the cyclops stuff that got a lot more response than I was anticipating.

[Dan Bernstein]

The fact that this was taken seriously.

[Matt]

Yeah. There were so many emails that I read through and I'm just like, that's a lot of time.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh my God.

[Matt]

Like a lot of thought in someone's data to send out some of these. Some of the emails,

[Dan Bernstein]

somebody's like, you know what? I'm sorry. I know I'm supposed to call this client back, right?

[Matt]

Especially with my family right now.

[Dan Bernstein]

Or. Yeah, right. My kid's been in the hospital for a week. But this takes precedence. This is simply just more important. Understood. Justin says, saw Odyssey in imax. Looked incredible. Costumes, scenery, lighting, sound. Unreal. The layout and the story are slow. The final act is corny. Two slices of pie. I don't know.

[Matt]

Oh boy.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay, well, that's the second invocation of the word corny that we've gotten here. And Mark says, dan, I'm sure there are countless emails about this from people much smarter than I am, but hearing you say you're not a big fan of Christopher Nolan movies, then watching the disgust on your face as Maddie ran down the list, only then to say you've only seen two of them was the most Bernstein shit ever.

[Matt]

100%. 100%. Yeah. And there's. I've gotten a few responses about apparently there's a. There's a large Christopher Nolan fan club that I've apparently offended.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, no. Like I did with the Noah Khan people.

[Matt]

Yes. Oh, God, yes. That was another one that was interesting.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, the Noah Khan people.

[Matt]

Oh, my. So I just. I googled. I googled his name yesterday and then just. And clicked on movies and just read things that he's associated with some of those.

[Dan Bernstein]

There were some executive production credits.

[Matt]

Yes. So production house. But I never said he directed them. But people are like, you never directed them. You need to learn how to use IMDb. Directing and producing is very different. Like, great. Yeah, I never said it, but his name is associated with some really shitty DC movies.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Matt]

Yeah. But I love that, though. That's funny that it was very Bernstein of you to not like him. And then I read the list and you've seen two.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I didn't say didn't. I'm just. I don't know. I guess I would see more if I liked the ones I saw better, I guess. Right.

[Matt]

And we're. We're going tomorrow night to see Odyssey, by the way.

[Dan Bernstein]

You are IMAX?

[Matt]

Yes, but not the. Not the 70 millimeter.

[Dan Bernstein]

Not the mega IMAX.

[Matt]

Okay, yeah, the one in Woodridge, where it is. But we. We couldn't even go here in Libertyville because it was all. There was no good seats left for tomorrow night, so.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay. And Mark also adds dunkirk should be consumed immediately. All right, I will. I will note that.

[Matt]

I don't remember. Yeah, I think that was. I don't remember if I've seen it.

[Dan Bernstein]

I can't remember. We're going to close with this. That was sent in by the Strangles Federation, which is, I think, the group of people that make up the abstract concept that is Strangles the Clown. It begins, my good sirs, on the July 15 edition of Forward Progress. While discussing the innovative freedom fuel venture of politician slash kicking coach Trumpkin Randy Brown, Dan inquired, I don't know who could even find Paul Edinger now. Well, challenge accepted. As the self appointed Forward Progress Paul Edinger senior Correspondent, I took it upon myself to find Paul Edinger. First, some background. Paul Edinger IV spent his formative years playing soccer and dodging bath salt zombies in the mean streets of Lakeland, Florida. Paul attended Lakeland's prestigious Kathleen High School, whose other notable alumni include the white suit witness Ray Lewis and legendary NFL medium snapper DEZ Clark. Edinger parlayed a strong soccer leg into a football scholarship at Michigan State University under the tutelage of insufferable ass bag Nick Saban Prior to entering the NFL, in an attempt to shorten his kicking motion, Paul removed a full step from his approach and developed his signature corkscrew kicking style. Edinger had five very respectable seasons with the Bears, making over 76% of his field goal attempts. He spent his last NFL season with the Minnesota Vikings. Of note, Edinger and Tommy Brooker are the only two NFL place kickers with a minimum 100 attempts to make 100% of their extra points in a career. After his NFL career, Paul bounced around the arena league, including a 2008 season with the Chicago Rush. I believe Mr. Edinger regrettably missed by just one year having his kicks called by Bernstein. That is true. However, Paul returned to the limelight in 2009 with a story that broke on the Boars and Bernstein Show. Most assuredly Paul by an intrepid, young, underappreciated, underpaid, unnamed executive producer. The story detailed how Edinger's entrepreneurial spirit led to the creation of the first and only Kickin it in Costa Rica Camp. The camp combined football, kicking instruction, surfing lessons, massages and a beach vacation in Playa Hermosa, Costa Rica, all for the bargain price of $900. Despite all the distractions, Paul assured attendees, keep in mind you are here for kicking. Our focus will be kicking. Legend has it, following the camp, Edinger continued to live in Costa Rica for a time, surfing and fishing to survive, and he included video evidence of Paul Edinger's surfing prowess. The last known public interview with Paul Edinger occurred in a January 2023 episode of the now defunct Chicago Clubhouse podcast, whose actual tagline is where they think they know everything, but honestly, they don't know shit. Perhaps, perhaps three, one, two or your lawyers could look into the trademark status of this tagline as I find it appropriate more for DBU in a wide ranging, captivating 1 hour, 29 minute interview, the clubhouse hosts T. Nick Frank Dank and Foul Mouth C masterfully extracted a gold mine of information from Mr. Edinger. Favorite coach, the aforementioned Saban Favorite pizza Giordano's Favorite steakhouse Gibson's most memorable play? Citrus bowl winning kick against Florida. Edinger reported he eventually returned to his roots in Florida, coaching special teams at a Florida high school and training young kickers privately. Currently, he coaches his son in 12U football and baseball, which practically makes him an Abata Cola minus the lustrous mane. Paul did not indicate if fishing was still his primary source of sustenance, though he did mention he spends a lot of time outdoors, which practically makes him a Bernstein, minus the overinflated ego. Paul Edinger's current LinkedIn profile states he is in the Jacksonville metro region as the area manager for Southern Glazers Wine and Spirits. After all this time, I found Paul Edinger. He has emerged from the bears kicking wilderness, and he appears to be doing just fine.

[Matt]

Wow. I got a buddy that works at Southern Wine and Spirits.

[Genevieve]

You should.

[Dan Bernstein]

Hey, if Paul Edinger is an area manager, absolutely. Hook them up. But, yeah, that's the Glazer family, right? I think. Isn't that Malcolm Glazer's family? The Buccaneers owners who are part of that industry? I think.

[Matt]

I didn't know that. Yeah. Is that correct?

[Dan Bernstein]

I believe so. I believe so. You know, this July, it's time to ride Smoke. Repeat right away on any qualifying new Harley Davidson motorcycle from Woodstock Harley Davidson. And you will take home a free Traeger smoker, a new bike for the open road, a new smoker for the backyard. That is one incredible summer. But don't wait. This offer is only available through July 31, and it's while supplies last, so stop by Woodstock Harley Davidson today before this deal goes up in Smoke. Offer valid through July 31, 2026. One Traeger smoker with qualifying new motorcycle purchase. No substitutions or cash value. See dealer for complete details or online@woodstock hd.com so I put this together and I see. I do these things for you because it was. I think. Where did we come up with this? Just yesterday, off the top of our respective heads here.

[Matt]

Yes. Just in. Yeah. A little. Little conversation. And we say, you did it for you. You did. Is it me or for them? Well, I.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's mean.

[Matt]

You mean them, right?

[Dan Bernstein]

I mean, you, the listener.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

You're. I mean, you. You listen, too, you know, nominally while talking kind of. Well, you're not working on other things. I know.

[Matt]

Oh, I was working on something. I got some good ideas, too. What we talked about after.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, you do?

[Matt]

Yes, sir.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, I knew you would. I knew you would. I knew you would.

[Matt]

Well, this is under one specific theme, so I'll. I'll shoot them after you when we're done here.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I can't wait. And.

[Matt]

And.

[Dan Bernstein]

And you, the listener, will know about this, and you're going to be very excited about it soon enough.

[Matt]

I'm very excited. There's only.

[Dan Bernstein]

I can only tease. It's going to be great. It's going to be great. I know you wanted it for a while. We got all kinds of stuff in the hopper here at 312Sports.

[Matt]

And the best part about it is just looking at the. At the calendar, I can actually make it. So it's perfect.

[Dan Bernstein]

Hey, awesome. I. I know some other people that might be a part of this too, have expressed the desire to be there, and it might just surprise you. So I think that's going to be fun. So this list is of the Cubs and socks that have made the MLB All Star Game in my lifetime. These are the worst players to have done it.

[Matt]

I love it.

[Dan Bernstein]

I should say the worst performances that have been awarded an All Star appearance.

[Matt]

Okay, so, yeah, so the top 10 Chicago baseball players, worst season performances, first half performances that earned.

[Dan Bernstein]

Correct.

[Matt]

An All Star appearance.

[Dan Bernstein]

They're not necessarily bad players. They're not necessarily great players. These are just like, oh, this. That was the All Star team. Oh, oh, okay.

[Matt]

All right, let's go.

[Dan Bernstein]

So here, here, we're gonna. Let me start with honorable mentions.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

The honorable mentions are 2014 starlin castro.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Who finished with an ops plus of just 115. I also had 1988 cub. Vance law was an All Star. That's a good one. Remember Vance because he was, of course, he was the third baseman on the division champion 83 White Sox. No relation to Rudy Law. But the 83 White Sox had had a. They had Rudy Law in center and they advanced Law at third. I thought it was a much better story if they were related because explaining that would be very interesting.

[Matt]

Yes,

[Dan Bernstein]

but no, they were not. And I, yes, I can still do the Rudy Law stance, you know, in a way that anybody who knew that team at the moment I did it would know exactly nice who the hitter was. Of course I can. So that is. Do I have another one? Yeah. Travis Wood, 2013, I had on there as an honorable mention.

[Matt]

That's a good one.

[Dan Bernstein]

Travis Wood was an All Star. 2025 Shane Smith from the Sox. And another honorable mention, 1984, Richard Dotson. Because that is when Richard Dotson, if I remember correctly, was suffering of an. An overgrowth in his musculature in his throwing shoulder that impinged on the shoulder in a way that he at one point could only throw change ups. And he kept pitching for a while even though he was bad. So I give him a lot of credit. But Richard Dodson, in a. In a two war season was an all star in 84. A year that most White Sox fans would prefer to be excised from the annals of history.

[Matt]

Yep.

[Dan Bernstein]

Number 10, worst Chicago all Star. I have to say this in Joe Buck's voice. Outfielder Scott. But said Nick. And there is, there is sort of an extenuating circumstance here because he was voted in. That was in 2005. That was the year they had like they would save an extra spot for others receiving votes and then they had a special election. And in that. Outfielder Scott Pincednik was an All Star in a season in which he had 1.9 wins above replacement and a WRC plus of 80.

[Government Fromage]

88. Oh,

[Dan Bernstein]

but, but big home run, though. Yeah, man. Look, luck is part of baseball and being one of the. That those White Sox were one of the great postseason teams of all time.

[Matt]

All time. And there's no, no doubt about that. You can't argue that. You can't.

[Dan Bernstein]

They romped. They had one of the great runs to a title of all time.

[Matt]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

And I don't know the seasons they got out of Neil Kots and Cliff Police. Go. Look at those numbers.

[Government Fromage]

Go.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's ridiculous. But that baseball will do that. And you just got to take advantage of it when you can. So Scott betsetting. Number 10, number 9, 1996 Steve Traxel. Ooh, all Star. Major League all star Steve Traxel. 1996.

[Matt]

A96. Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

His finishing wins above replacement via fan graphs. 1.6. Okay. Number eight. And this is again, catchers can be weird, but in the year 2000, the year 2000, Joe Girardi was a National League All Star. He finished the season with 1.7 wins above replacement and a WRC plus of 83.

[Matt]

Perfect.

[Dan Bernstein]

Middle. So that's why he's. He's number eight, number seven on this list. There's a lot of cubs on this list. 2008, Kosuke Fukudome. Ooh. See, this is the response I want, I want the response to be ooh or oh. Oh, I guess he was an All Star that year, wasn't he?

[Matt]

Yeah, because his wasn't his first that bad. A home run or a home run in his first game. Right? Yep.

[Dan Bernstein]

That he was part of a. He was part of a previous list when we did best debuts.

[Matt]

Yeah. And what a. And just the inappropriate response and celebration

[Dan Bernstein]

and the, the headbands and all of the racist stuff. Yeah. So Kosuke Fukudome that year when he was an All Star, finished with a war of 1.4 and a WRC plus of 91.

[Matt]

Oh, 91.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Matt]

A little bit higher than I was

[Dan Bernstein]

going to guess, but he was an All Star. And that is the seventh worst all time Chicago All Star. Who's number six? You Ask. You got to go all the way back to the White Sox in 1975. And the. This is. This is like right around when I was starting to maybe have some perception. I was in kindergarten and starting to have some perception of. I think it's around when I went to my first game with my. My uncle, who grew up a White Sox fan, went to South Shore High School, and my Uncle Denny would, you know, was giving me the. Would take me because my parents, like, I don't know. I don't go to the south side, go anywhere. It was. It was bad enough around Wrigley, like, oh, no, no, no. South side. You don't want to go down there. Bad things happen to people down there. And my Uncle Danny was like, get in the car. We're going to a Sox game. And Bucky Dent was an all star in 75. Bucky Dent had a 1.2 war and a WRC plus of 78.

[Matt]

Oh, 78.

[Dan Bernstein]

78.

[Government Fromage]

Wow. All right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Just.

[Matt]

Just to. I want. I want to just put this out there too. If you go to fans. Fan graph. Fan graphs, yes. They're ranking their ranking of war, like how it works. So if you're not super familiar with WAR and you know it, but you don't, you know, you're not too into it. Okay, So a zero to one is what they call a scrub. One to two is a role player or bench player. So just to give a little insight.

[Government Fromage]

So.

[Dan Bernstein]

Thank you.

[Matt]

Talk about 1.2 war, 1.3 war. Someone might say, oh, well, he's above zero, so it must be good. No, 1 to 2 is a role player or a bench player if you're less than 2. Actually, if you're. If you're. Okay, so here, let me just go this way. 2 to 3 is a solid everyday starter. 3 to 4 is a good player. 4 to 5 is what they consider an All Star. So you need to be at least four wins above replacement. Four to five to be an All Star. Five to seven is superstar. Eight plus is MVP candidate. And that's what fan graph says.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right.

[Matt]

So when you're, when you're saying that these guys are all stars at 1.2, those are barely bench players.

[Dan Bernstein]

Those guys who finish the season, maybe at the time they were doing well relative to their peers. And I'm so. I'm allowing for that.

[Matt]

Sure.

[Dan Bernstein]

But it just saying that at the end of the season, you're. You're a scrub. Yes, you're bad.

[Matt]

If you Finish at a 1.2, you should be a bench Player, you should be the 25th man on a roster that barely sees playing time.

[Government Fromage]

Right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Not to mention, a WRC plus of 78 is 22 points below average offensive production in that year. That run environment park adjusted.

[Matt]

Yeah. Because that. That's at 100 is even. Anything below that is you're less than the average player. And to be a 78 and an all Star, that's an Oguda.

[Dan Bernstein]

So that's where Bucky Dent, a 1.2 WAR. He is number six from 1975. Number five. We look at the year 1977, Cubs second baseman Manny Trio was a one WAR player and had a WRC plus again of 83. And Manny Trio in 1977 was an All Star. So he's fifth on this list.

[Matt]

So again, that's 17 points lower than an average offensive player.

[Dan Bernstein]

Number number four. And this is the name you've probably been waiting for because this is the name that people like to use as the example of. Oh, being an all Star. Blank was an all Star.

[Matt]

Yeah. My guy, right.

[Dan Bernstein]

2012 Cubs, Brian Lahere. Oh, that hurts. Do you know what his end of season war was?

[Matt]

Was he even a one war player?

[Dan Bernstein]

No, he was at 0.6. He was just over half a win. He did have a 110 WRC plus, but. But overall he was. He was worth 6/10 of a win at the conclusion of his all star

[Matt]

season, which FanGraphs would categorize him as a scrub as.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's the literal word they use.

[Matt]

Yeah, that's the literal word they use in their rankings.

[Dan Bernstein]

They say a scrub, they say.

[Matt]

I'm looking at it right now. Zero to one is a scrub. Yep.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay. Number three. 1976, the year of the bicentennial. This was 50 years ago when Cubs catcher Steve Swisher, father of Nick,

[Matt]

was

[Dan Bernstein]

named to the NL all star. Oh, wow. Steve Swisher was an All Star his war that season, 0.5. His WRC plus 61.

[Matt]

Oh, my God. Are you serious? Jesus.

[Dan Bernstein]

That. Those were all star numbers for the Cubs catcher in 1976. And this is what happens if you gotta. You gotta take somebody from every team here. You gotta do this. That's number three.

[Matt]

Wait, what was the rest of the team?

[Dan Bernstein]

Don't look.

[Matt]

Good grief.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, These. These are my formative baseball years. I mean, Jose Cardinal and, you know, I don't think Buckner was there yet. I don't think Buckner got there until after because that was the dejesus trade with the Dodgers.

[Matt]

I think that's awful.

[Dan Bernstein]

All right, Number Two. And I didn't. I knew it was bad. I didn't know it was this bad. The second worst Chicago All Star of all time was in 1980. Ladies and gentlemen, Ed Farmer. Oh, wow. Ed Farmer finished that year with a war of point one.

[Genevieve]

Wow.

[Dan Bernstein]

1/10 of a win. More interesting, Ed Farmer averaged 4.88 strikeouts per nine innings and 5.06 walks per

[Matt]

nine innings, more walks than strikeouts. And he was an All Star.

[Government Fromage]

All right.

[Dan Bernstein]

And I didn't. I. I should look at hit batsman or nearly hit batsman.

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because it was entertaining when he entered games because he was just throwing at everybody and really hard and with all kinds of bad intentions. You didn't want to stand in the box, but you did because you likely be on first base. But that was your closer, and that was your 1980 White Sox All Star, Ed Farmer with a 0.1. Warren.

[Government Fromage]

Wow.

[Matt]

All right. I'm dying to know who number one it was then.

[Dan Bernstein]

Now, the reason why number one is easy is because it's not like they just needed to. To fill. To put somebody on the team. This was also in 1977. And if you remember, at number five, Manny Trio was a Cubs All Star in 1977. So there's. You had a representative, even though he was a one war player with an 83 WRC plus. And yet somehow in 1977, Jerry Morales was also an all Star. Remember Jerry Morales with the high hands? Jerry Morales finished that season with a WAR of negative 0.4. So he was below replacement level underwater in WAR. An all star with a negative wins above replacement. And then you think, well, how is that possible? Because he had a WRC plus of 103. Well, here's how. He was one of the very worst defensive players in all of baseball with fielding runs above average at negative 23.6.

[Government Fromage]

Wow.

[Dan Bernstein]

And in God's name, I. I have no clue how that happened, but Jerry Morales was invited to the 1977 All Star Game as a representative of your powder blue clad Chicago Cubs.

[Matt]

Yeah. The baseball reference. The B wore 0 point negative 0.7.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, God.

[Matt]

That team finished 81 and 81.

[Dan Bernstein]

And I think the best player on the team was their closer. I think Rick Russell was also really good that year. Was. Was that the year he won 20 or was that 78? But they had. They had a couple of decent players on the 77 team, but Jerry Morales wasn't one of them. And yet he was an all Star. So I placed him number one on my list.

[Matt]

What year did Steve Swisher make the All Star.

[Dan Bernstein]

76.

[Matt]

76. Because this. This year, he was a. He was a negative 1.1 player in 77.

[Dan Bernstein]

He played enough to. To accrue negative 1.1 in war. That real bad. A terrible 74 games. Okay. In only 74 games.

[Genevieve]

All right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well done.

[Matt]

Well hit. 190. 229. 298 for an OPS of. 527.

[Dan Bernstein]

Nicely done. Oh, man, that's bad. So there you have it. That is the list.

[Matt]

That's great.

[Dan Bernstein]

Of the worst Chicago MLB All Stars in my lifetime.

[Matt]

That 77 team. Their. Their best OPS Plus, Buckner was 109.

[Dan Bernstein]

And it was Steve Antiveros on Averroes. Yes. And Steven Averos, who also appeared in Cy Sperling's Hairline Creations.

[Matt]

Did he really?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yo. Sure he did. Oh, yeah, Steve. Oh, yeah. Before his plastic hair, he was very sad. And then after the plastic hair, he was very happy.

[Matt]

And they.

[Dan Bernstein]

They would run the ad in black and white in. In TV Guide.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Not the. Not the newspaper. Free. Like the actual subscription. Real glossy TV Guide. Yeah, you would see. You'd flip there big. Oh, they're paying the big bucks there because they got. They got Steve Otiveros Lego hair.

[Government Fromage]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Ste likes his plastic hair.

[Matt]

Hey, can I share one real quick? That just came through? Because it's. It's. It's about email. Yeah, I have an email real fast. That came through Friday. Feedback.

[Dan Bernstein]

Sure. We have no rules here.

[Matt]

And it's from. It's from Nick. He says, hey, guys, I don't know why, but the story of the guy cutting off his penis, lighting it on fire and throwing it in his mom's garage feels like a very dark episode that never aired of Everybody Loves Raymond. Why I find that so humorous. I never watched Everybody Loves Raymond. Very familiar with it, but it just

[Dan Bernstein]

sounds funny that I thought that show was wonderful. It was much like Seinfeld. It was basically these. These stories of a Jewish family where they have to pretend they're not Jewish.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

But like, like, like you have to call the guy George Costanza, and it's like, my God. Your. It's. Your parents are Estelle Harris and Jerry Stiller. Your last name is not Costanza. I'm sorry.

[Matt]

Did you watch Everybody Loves Raymond?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes.

[Government Fromage]

Oh, you did?

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, yeah, Yeah, I did that.

[Matt]

Really?

[Dan Bernstein]

Because it was. And they in his name was Barone. Even though all the stories are Phil Rosenthal's family. Not. Not our guy, Phil Rosenthal, but their producer, Phil Rosenthal, and they based all the story. And I just. I love that show because he was supposed supposedly a sports columnist for a New York paper.

[Matt]

Okay.

[Dan Bernstein]

And yet he was always home.

[Matt]

Feels like a very dark episode that never aired of Everybody Loves Raymond. That just, that was funny.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's great. That's really good. Well done all. And don't forget this weekend, if you're going to be outside the house or doing housework and all that, consider your windows. Just consider that you've been thinking about this or you know, every time you hear the air conditioning come on, oh God, I need new windows. Don't wait. Call Russ. It's a great time to do it. Russ will answer your call. He'll set up a meeting, he'll come out, he'll talk to you about Windows 847-302-9171. And then you can cut through all the BS that's out there. And there's a lot, there's a lot of garbage out there in windows advertising and there's a lot of things you don't need. There's a lot of deals that aren't real and silly ways to sell windows where they, they do all these teasers like you're buying cookies at the grocery store. That's not how windows work. And Russ will tell you and he will match any price if you want to talk to some of these other places. But he'll also provide custom made windows for your home built at the factory here in Chicago that he owns. And he can tell you what you need, what you don't need, what you're paying for, why you're paying for it. And, and then you can enjoy the process with Russ like I have. And that's where his crew does the installation. His people do the measuring. He is in touch with you. You're dealing directly with the owner. The owner owns the entire process here. It's not one company making a call and transferring you to another company. That's oh, we're just the marketing people. Then you have to talk to the windows people. You're going to get the run around in other places. You will not get the run around from Russ and you'll get the best price. So call 847-302-9171 and check out his five star reviews at ChicagoNowGuys.com Dan Bernstein Unfiltered has been brought to you by Chicago window guys. 847-302-9171 and today by Harley Davidson Woodstock. You can check them out@woodstock hd.com

[Government Fromage]

Dan

[Dan Bernstein]

Bernstein Unfiltered Unfiltered on 312 Sports

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