Craig Counsell’s Masterpiece: How the Cubs Are Winning Despite Pitching Injuries

Summary

Episode Overview

Podcast: Dan Bernstein Unfiltered
Episode: Craig Counsell’s Masterpiece: How the Cubs Are Winning Despite Pitching Injuries
Air Date: May 12, 2026
Host: Dan Bernstein
Co-host: Matt Abbatacola

This episode centers on one of the biggest stories in Chicago sports: the early-season success of the Cubs under manager Craig Counsell, despite an unprecedented rash of injuries to the pitching staff. Bernstein and Abbatacola dissect Counsell’s performance, exploring what makes his approach unique and lauding his leadership at the quarter mark of the season. The discussion extends into broader changes in baseball managing, including the implementation of ABS challenges, evolving roles of managers, and even how modern coaching compares to other sports and eras.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Stage: Cubs’ Success Amid Adversity

• As of May 12, 2026, the Cubs stand at 27-14, with an 86.1% playoff chance according to Fangraphs, ranking among the league’s best despite losing a third of their pitching staff to injury ([04:18]–[05:55]).
• Injuries detailed include:
  • Justin Steele (ace, flexor strain, not returning before All-Star break)
  • Kate Horton (season-ending elbow surgery)
  • Matthew Boyd, Jordan Wicks, Porter Hodge, Hunter Harvey, Riley Martin, Phil Maton, Daniel Palencia, Caleb Thielbar
• Bernstein: “This ship lost, like a third of its sailors… They got hurt, they fell off, they were eaten by the screeching eels and the sharks and everything else of those waters. And still, here's Craig Counsell.” ([03:43])

2. Craig Counsell: The Reluctant Genius

• Counsell’s leadership style is described as obsessively process-oriented, fundamentally consistent, and refreshingly without self-promotion.
• Bernstein: “If he isn't manager of the year right now, then you’ve got to retire that award.” ([02:47])
• Even with constant roster shuffles, Counsell maximizes defense and keeps the team competitive.

Notable Quote

• Bernstein: “He doesn't wanna hear any of this...But I just want Craig Counsel to know that...if he's sitting around after a game, flipping channels after dinner with a tub of ice cream on his lap, it’s okay to say, you know what, I’m doing a pretty good job.” ([06:23])

3. Managing Through Change: ABS Challenges and Modern Decisions

• ABS (automated ball/strike) challenges introduce new pressures and opportunities for managers ([12:20]):
  • Requires careful, timely, data-driven decisions
  • Raises the baseline of manager value as challenges can have large in-game impacts

Notable Quote

• Bernstein: “Here’s a way to completely change games. Here’s a way to understand this is a new managerial power. And it’s also a power that can make you look really bad if it’s used improperly.” ([13:46])

4. Defensive Excellence and Key Players

• The Cubs’ up-the-middle defense is praised, specifically Pete Crow-Armstrong in center field:
  • “That monster out there just sucking everything up.” ([17:49])
  • Bernstein compares Crow-Armstrong’s athleticism to Brian Urlacher: “To go from standing still to knowing exactly where you’re supposed to be at top speed over a long space...it’s a similar skill.” ([19:20])

Notable Quote

• Bernstein: “It’s special and worth going to a game just to watch that happen.” ([20:18])

5. Pitching Carousel & Statistical Overachievement

• Cubs have had seven relievers register saves—tying the Twins for the most in baseball. Counsell spins the wheel with new arms nightly ([21:16]).
• The team’s record slightly outpaces their “third-order record”—an advanced stat adjusting for run differential and opponent quality, which they outstrip by 1.3 wins ([23:25]).

Notable Quote

• Bernstein: “Usually, if you have a better record than your run differential would indicate, we tend to call that a managerial stat.” ([22:38])

6. Changing Role of the Manager & Baseball Culture

• Fewer old-school manager-umpire arguments due to more replay, ABS, and deeper data ([27:41]–[32:45]).
• Co-host: “The game is changing...what’s expected and needed of a manager is much different than back then.” ([28:50])
• The old idea of managers being hired for “personality” and on-field antics is obsolete; now it’s about process, data, and information.

Notable Quote

• Bernstein: “A lot of those feelings, you know what they are? They're wrong. Wrong and bad.” ([30:39])

7. Shift in Sports Fashion and Coaching Culture

• Tangents about basketball coaches wearing suits vs. casual wear, and how Fred Hoiberg partially led to NBA coaches dressing down ([39:32]).
• Nostalgia for NBA’s “arms race” in fine suits, but overall acceptance of evolving standards.

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Memorable Moments & Quotes with Timestamps

| Time | Speaker | Quote / Moment | |-----------|---------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:43 | Bernstein | “This ship lost, like a third of its sailors...And still, here’s Craig Counsell.” | | 06:23 | Bernstein | “I hope he can wake up in the morning knowing he’s really doing a hell of a job.” | | 13:46 | Bernstein | “Here’s a way to completely change games. Here’s a way to understand this is a new managerial power...” | | 17:49 | Bernstein | “That monster out there just sucking everything up.” | | 19:20 | Bernstein | “[Pete Crow-Armstrong’s burst]...sometimes? Erlacher. Oh, God. I’m not kidding.” | | 20:18 | Bernstein | “It’s special and worth going to a game just to watch that happen.” | | 22:38 | Bernstein | “Usually, if you have a better record than your run differential would indicate, we tend to call that a managerial stat.” | | 30:39 | Bernstein | “A lot of those feelings, you know what they are? They're wrong. Wrong and bad.” |

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Other Segments

Cubs’ Statistical Breakdown

• Cubs: 27-14 (actual), 26-15 (third order)—outperforming expectations
• Brewers: 22-16 (both actual and third order) ([23:53])
• Reds: Playing five games ahead of their expected record despite a negative run differential ([24:05])

Broader Sports Talk

• Brief digressions on NBA playoff teams, Anthony Edwards/Donovan Mitchell, coaching attire, and generational fashion trends in sports fans ([34:43] onward).

Wildlife Story [43:08]

• Short segment on a viral story from Surfer.com: A tourist in Maui throws a rock at an endangered monk seal, claiming “I’m rich, I can pay the fines”; receives instant local justice and now faces prosecution. Both hosts celebrate the strong community/environmental values shown.

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Conclusion

This episode is a deep and humorous examination of the Cubs’ early 2026 season, shining the spotlight on Craig Counsell’s understated brilliance amid adversity. Bernstein uses his signature blend of sharp analysis and irreverence to reframe what “managerial value” means in today’s data-and-change-driven game. Listeners come away with both a fresh appreciation for Counsell’s impact and a wider view of baseball’s ongoing evolution.

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Quick Reference: Important Segments by Timestamp

• [04:18]–[05:55] — Cubs’ injury crisis breakdown
• [06:23] — Emotional tribute to Counsell’s job
• [13:46] — Impact of ABS challenges on managers
• [19:20]/[20:18] — Crow-Armstrong defensive praise & Urlacher comparison
• [22:38] — Analysis of Cubs’ overachievement and “managerial stat”
• [27:41]–[32:45] — Evolution of manager’s role (on-field arguments, culture)
• [43:08] onward — Wildlife justice story; lighthearted animal chatter

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Tone & Style

• Candid, informed, irreverent, heavy on sharp, vivid metaphors (“screeching eels” of the pitcher injury list, “monster out there sucking everything up”).
• Frequent asides and humor, especially on old-school vs. new-school baseball and coaching.

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For anyone who missed the episode:
You’ll get a compelling deep dive into why Craig Counsell is quietly working managerial magic in Chicago, a rundown of how baseball managing is evolving before our eyes, and plenty of laughs and perspective along the way.

Transcript

[Dan Bernstein]

Everybody talked about it since I first moved to Oregon. The big one. The earthquake that trashed the whole West Coast. Total destruction. Officially calling it the largest natural disaster in American history. I just didn't know what would help me next. So I took it all. Even the gun.

[Co-host]

It was time.

[Dan Bernstein]

Cello see why American Afterlife is the number one fiction and drama podcast in America. Presented by pair of thieves. Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you listen to your favorite, favorite shows. Available now.

[Co-host]

Dan Bernstein, unfiltered.

[Dan Bernstein]

Unfiltered on three 1, 2.

[Co-host]

Sports

[Dan Bernstein]

DBU on three 1, 2. And we are brought to you today in partnership with my bookie. You're already giving me a look. Oh, yeah, you did. You started out by giving me a look. I don't know what it means, but it already was designed to throw me off and make me uncomfortable.

[Co-host]

I didn't give you a look.

[Dan Bernstein]

You did.

[Co-host]

I didn't. I was looking at you. That wasn't a look. I was looking at you.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, but you're looking at me like I was doing something wrong. And then you're making me question myself.

[Co-host]

No, not at all. I'm sorry if that happened. I just. I was opening my Waterloo Lemon Italian Ice, and this is the. The Guy Fieri flavortone.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, it's good. I've had it. But they.

[Co-host]

They changed the packaging.

[Dan Bernstein]

There's no more picture of him on there.

[Co-host]

No the. Even the case itself, they took him off and they. It's really small letters.

[Dan Bernstein]

They minimized his name.

[Co-host]

Guy Fieri Flavor.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's a bad sign.

[Co-host]

Guy wondering what was happening with the sales.

[Dan Bernstein]

I think it may be they're moving you out. Hey, we love you. We just don't want your name or your picture on the can anywhere near

[Co-host]

anything that we do.

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know.

[Co-host]

Flavor's good.

[Dan Bernstein]

I think you gotta kind of go back to your contract. I want you to go to your lawyer and see, because God knows he needs. We need to see more of him.

[Co-host]

So that's what that look was. I forgot. I was wanted to share that with you.

[Dan Bernstein]

Thank you.

[Co-host]

And then I forgot to do. Because I know you like this flavor.

[Dan Bernstein]

Thank you. I do. I tried it the first time when you sent me home with it. You said that when I drove home, I had to be very, very careful.

[Co-host]

You don't just end up in Flavor Town.

[Dan Bernstein]

You don't know why. And the next thing you know, you're picking up. You're like, where am I? And you've made a right turn into Flavortown.

[Co-host]

It's possible well, because I bought the first case at sunset and it's two minutes from my house and I cracked one open on the way home because I couldn't wait to try it. And then three hours later I like come to and I'm in Flavortown and I was covered in donkey sauce. At least that's what they told me it was.

[Dan Bernstein]

It could be garlic sauce, you might have known, but okay. I'm glad you're all right. We all are and we're all counting on you. Craig Counsell is at this point, we're at the quarter point of the season. Not the quarter poll, not the horse racing term.

[Co-host]

Right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because that's the, that's with a quarter left in the race.

[Co-host]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

This is the quarter mark of the season. And if he isn't manager of the year right now, then you got to retire that award like it's got. You got to forget that award if you can't give the manager of the year to Craig Council right now. The job that he's doing has been sort of presumed as we're like, there's been a lot of yay Cubs. Hooray for Cubs and hooray for Dansby Swanson's defense and Pete Crowe, Armstrong running everything down and hitting the big home run and Babe Conforto. But can we just take a second here? My goal for the moment for today is to take maybe the least self promoting manager that we've ever had here with the Cubs. Like he doesn't, he's too busy being worried about how he's going to get the next 27 outs to be bothered with any sort of self aggrandizement whatsoever or self promotion. But I just want it explained in detail here what exactly the manager of the Cubs has done. Because if you said, hey, here's what the injury list is going to look like on May. It's the 12th, right. Here's your injured players right now. Remember they brought in Tyler Austin.

[Co-host]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

And there was sort of this debate between Tyler Austin, Michael Conforto or what I call the corpse of Michael Conforto. And I think Joe Sheehan and I were the low guys on Conforto. It's good company. I'll take it that Tyler Austin hurt his knee out for the year. Justin Steele, who was expected back around now, flexor strain, another injury, not expected back maybe until after the All Star break. So this was your one, your putative ace. Not here. So who's the next ace? Kate Horton, the youngster who last year looked like he was on track to be a dominant pitcher. Season ending elbow injury, early April. He's done. It's ucl and they're going to do with the procedure, internal bracing and get him back and figure that all out. Matthew Boyd, 15 day DL, knee surgery, playing with his kids is the official story that we believe. Jordan Wicks, forearm and nerve issues, just started rehab. Porter Hodge, right flexor strain, out on the 60 day DL, probably not coming back. Hunter Harvey, triceps strain, he's out. Riley Martin, came up, he was great. Flexor strain, eight weeks out. Phil Maton, was out with right knee tendonitis before finally coming back looking okay. Daniel Palencia with a strained lat. Caleb Thielbar, left hamstring strain. That's this year already. Yeah, that is this year already. And the Cubs are arguably the best team in baseball, 27 and 14. They have, according to fan graphs, an 86.1% chance of making the playoffs. Like, and we don't. We never mentioned, like, hey, is this guy doing an unbelievable job? You know, we couldn't wait after every Bears game to talk about Ben Johnson because it's obvious, because Ben Johnson's calling a play. Ben Johnson's deciding on every single play. Here's what we're doing. Here's what we're. You can't really do that in baseball. You can't be that obviously significant. You need large samples of games and large samples of. Of events to make these pictures emerge. And this is not a tough one, is my point. This is an easy one. When you look at, well, who has steered this ship through difficult waters to this point. You want to use that metaphor? This ship lost, like a third of its sailors. They just. They got hurt, they fell off, they were eaten by the screeching eels and the sharks and everything else of those waters. And still, here's Craig Counsel. How many cannons you got left? 4. All right, we'll aim this one here. Blow that ship up. Blow that ship up. You know, hard to starboard. Bring it to this side. Okay, we're good. You go over here. Like, it is incredible the job that Craig Counsel has done right now. He doesn't wanna hear any of this. I promise you. I promise you, he would roll his eyes if he were listening to this right now, if he were in the room and if he heard this. Trust me, that's what's so great about him, is that I find sort of a kindred spirit in Craig Counsel because he's always. No matter how well things are going, he's always going to be worried about the next thing, like I imagine if they win the World Series, he'll give himself 10 minutes and they'll let a player dump something on his head. He's not going to be like Theo, where he went out like a four month bender at that point. Like the stories that I heard. And I hope he would be, because I think I've got no problem with that. I think if you do win a World Series, you should be able to drink on the job for as long as you want. Go ahead, milk it. Have at it. I just don't think he would, but it's not going to stop me. You know, his, his discomfort with this kind of praise or his discomfort with this kind of early praise in a season, he would never do it. He wouldn't want his players to do it, he wouldn't want to hear it, he wouldn't want to think about it. But, But I just want Craig Counsel to know that in, in that moment when he, if he's sitting around after a game, flipping channels after dinner with a tub of ice cream on his lap, it's okay to say, you know what, I'm doing a pretty good job. That's okay. So say that to yourself every once in a while. I hope he can wake up in the morning knowing he's really doing a hell of a job. And after especially losing to the brewers last year in the way that they did, the vitriol that he has faced from people in Milwaukee, where when we interviewed him the day he was hired officially after the news had gotten out and it was a. The anger out of there got to him, he was almost in tears thinking about it. He was really emotional about the way he was treated and the way that it surprised him. And he admitted that it surprised him how angry people were and how people felt. It was an act of treason. And of course they called him a T R a D E R, but it was somehow a violation of trust or that he'd broken some kind of unspoken compact. But he is doing exactly what he was hired to do, and that is do more with less, but not for the reasons we thought. He's proving everything that was seen in him by the people who hired him. Can you do more with less? What do we think? Let's go back. What do we think? Well, this is because Tom Ricketts doesn't want to spend any money. So he sees this small market team and figures, well, I can do that here. Here. I'm going to just pay the manage and that's gonna save me a bunch of money because he's so good at his job. And there was a cynical, skeptical way to look at it that I can't say is completely unfounded because of what the evidence was at the time. But they have spent. They have. And they did go get Alex Bregman, they did go get Cabrera. They're not necessarily asking him to do more with less, but he's doing it anyway. He's doing it anyway because of circumstances beyond his control, because of the fact of pitching injuries, because the inescapable fact of that. You can't control it. You can't control the frequency, the sequencing. All of a sudden everybody's hurt. What are you going to do? What are you going to tell your team? How are you going to allow your team to be able to continue to compete that next plate appearance? By doing the same things, by stressing defensive fundamentals and awareness and positioning and being a tough out, no zone. Don't swing at pitchers. Pitches make this a grinding lineup that by the time that starter is through, everybody one time, he's, he's 45 pitches in. Get into these pitch counts, change the way a series is managed because of what you do in the first game. All the stuff we talk about, about being a difficult opponent, they've done that and they haven't even had career year guys right now, maybe you know what Conforto is doing. You just, you know, even Craig Counsel at one point was asked why Conforter's in the lineup. And even he's like, he's hot. Like, you just throw your hands up at that point and say, yeah, he's obviously not going to continue this. This may be the day it stops. But at some point, even the most data based, evidence based managers can just be like, get in the lineup. I can't explain it. Whatever you figured out, go keep doing it. So he's not unwilling to do that. And you don't give out awards for a quarter season. But all I want to do is, is at this point to take this time to single out this job because it's pretty amazing. Also, one last point. He's doing this with the new wrinkle of ABS challenges being introduced this year. Just plop down in everybody's lap. Here you go. Here's a way to completely change games. Here's a way to understand this is a new managerial power. And it's also a power that can make you look really bad if it's used improperly. So it changed the stakes of managing. Managing's different now. This year Managing is different, but because you have somebody who is process oriented, who understands that the entirety of his job is about a steadiness and a commitment to doing the little right things all the time that add up with every single baseball event that happens. Doing everything right around the margins, having a way of doing things that is understood, that is accepted, and. And that is. That sets the business of baseball every single day. That kind of consistency, when coupled with a properly designed roster, can get you through nearly impossible difficulties that have been posed this year by injuries. And while doing that, with also understanding how to be ahead of his counterparts in the challenge game. And we'll know when that season's over. There's. There's really early noisy data about what challenges have done, but we can all. All he can do is put the rules in there. You get to challenge in these situations. You don't. Don't burn my challenges too early. And you, you know, these, these Scribbinis don't get to challenge a pitch. You do, you do, you do. And you do. Or ask me or do a quick look before you go up there. Say, hey, it's the sixth inning, we're down three. If I get a runner on, can I challenge? Yeah, I trust you. Go ahead. That he's been able to manage through that. When we have. We don't know. There's no book on that. We've got no understanding of how the challenges are going to work, what they might change for next year and going forward, or what the impact is going to be over the course of 162. It's all a long way of saying, good job, Craig. Counsel, keep it up.

[Co-host]

Yeah. I wonder if this ABS will have an impact on future jobs or if Major League Baseball will just look at umpires who are struggling or having a lot of challenges that they're losing. If they're just going to say, well, you know, we have a safety net in place now, so it doesn't matter

[Dan Bernstein]

that you're not good at it. Right.

[Co-host]

It doesn't matter.

[Dan Bernstein]

It has to matter.

[Co-host]

But why, though? Because if you get the call. Correct.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because you don't want to put that extra. Ideally, the umps would be so good that you wouldn't have to challenge balls and strikes.

[Co-host]

Sure.

[Dan Bernstein]

That ideally you're still.

[Co-host]

That's not humanly possible.

[Dan Bernstein]

Correct. You're still striving for them to be. And it might be a leading indicator of overall vision and judgment.

[Co-host]

Yeah. I wonder if it will have an impact at all. You also mentioned Babe Conforto. Just want to share what he's doing the month of May. And he's had 14 at bats the month of May. We're here on May 12th. His slash line is. 500, 588, 1143. His ops is 1731.

[Dan Bernstein]

All right, man. So he's still over. 200. WRC plus or OPS plus.

[Co-host]

Oh, God, yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, so he is.

[Co-host]

It's just amazing.

[Dan Bernstein]

Twice as good. More than twice as good right now as the average MLB hitter.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

In this run environment, yes. Okay.

[Co-host]

Just crazy.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, it's. And that's not managing, I don't think.

[Co-host]

No, no, no.

[Dan Bernstein]

But. But keeping him in the lineup is finding opportunities for somebody like that and maybe understanding, you know what, we're not going to cool it off today because this pitcher's too good. So if we need you, we'll call you later.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

The way they've positioned this defense this year to help whoever is pitching, understanding that you can get through some of these pitching by hitting over it and maximizing your defense and getting everything you can. If the pitchers can just keep the ball in the ballpark and knowing that anything in between the alleys, in the middle of the field, in the air is an out.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because you have that. That monster out there just sucking everything up.

[Co-host]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because it is crazy when you. Here's the thing, too, and I'm glad we brought this up. The camera angle and the outfield in Texas in that horrible ballpark, that funereal, like, corrugated roof. It's like they put a baseball field in a hockey rink is how that place feels. It's dark, it's awful. That's my least favorite ballpark in MLB right now.

[Co-host]

Even the outside shot is ugly.

[Dan Bernstein]

It's all ugly. I'd rather have the AAA place in Sacramento. I really would. But the way now when you get other angles on Pete Crowe, Armstrong running things down, like, we know the Wrigley angle. You know that because you know the center field camera cut to one of the, you know, the other shots that track the ball and you're like, okay, he's got that or that's gone. Or. But when you see some of these cavernous outfields and you see the ball off the bat and you think gapper and it's not even close to a hit.

[Co-host]

What was the game that he ran like 140ft or 130ft track? The one in like left center every game? No, there was one that was like he ran and just kept running and kept running and he caught the ball without even like very little effort.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right. He's not at the end of his range yet. Yeah. He doesn't have to catch stuff at the peak of his range because he's, you know who he looks like in his burst on a line to me sometimes? Erlacher. Oh, God. I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. To go from standing still to knowing exactly where you're supposed to be at top speed over a long space. When you talk about like all time Chicago athletes are doing that.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's what when. For Urlacher, it was similar because it would. It's drop to a. In your backpedal, drop to a spot, identify where something is going to be and fire yourself at it. It's a similar skill where he gets a reaction to an impact. He'll see something, figure out where it's going to be, aim himself at it and fire himself.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

And meet that thing at that point. It's special and worth going to a game just to watch that happen. That he has been a huge reason why they've been able to pick up this pitching staff because you don't, you don't hang your head when a ball is hit hard right over your head.

[Co-host]

Right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Somebody's going to go track that down if it's in the park.

[Co-host]

Yeah. That up the middle defense that they always talk about in baseball with Carson Kelly, who's been exceptional with the abs as well, and then Swanson and Nico and then you have, you know, gold Glovers and left and center. Of course, center is the best defensive player in the game right now. Yeah, that certainly helps your managerial experience. But he also, I mean, he has seven. Seven relievers that have registered saves that might be tied for most with the Twins in baseball. I think they've each had seven. And being able to spin that wheel of pitchers and see when the door opens and who walks out and he meets him for the first time on the mound.

[Dan Bernstein]

What's your name? What do you do? What arm do you throw with? Left. All right, go get him.

[Co-host]

You're in.

[Dan Bernstein]

Go get him. Here's the baseball.

[Co-host]

Right.

[Dan Bernstein]

Make me proud, son.

[Co-host]

So, yeah, I mean, it just that being able to do that and it's just been exceptional. The job he's done here so far through 20, 27 and 12, we said. So 39 games in, is that right? 27, 12, they are 27 and 14.

[Dan Bernstein]

27 and 14 and it's 41 in. It's, it's, it's ridiculous when you actually read that list of injuries and you think, well, who's your best pitcher? Well, now, who's your best pitcher? Well, now, who's your best pitcher? And if your actual best pitcher ends up being a guy you didn't even want.

[Co-host]

Right. Right. The guy you said no to on the deal that you'd signed him to originally and then said, yeah, we'll. We'll bring it back here for this. Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host]

But it's also tied. I know the Dodgers have struggled just a little bit as far as Dodgers are concerned. I know they're a game or a half game out of first place in the west right now, and the Braves are the best record in baseball, but those are the three teams that have suffered the most pitching injuries so far this year. So credit to all those managers. Walt Weiss, first year with the. With the Braves.

[Dan Bernstein]

I also want the record to show here that when we use Pythagorean record. Because you, you know, bring up run differential.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

That usually, if you are. Have a better record than your run differential would indicate, we tend to call that a managerial stat.

[Co-host]

Yep.

[Dan Bernstein]

And it's. It's a reach to do that, but it's really all we have. Even with the Cubs at 27 and 14, their third order record is 26 and 15. So they're. It's not maybe statistically significant, but it is worth noting that their record is actually better than what their run differential, considering opponent quality says they should be.

[Co-host]

Yeah. And that third run. Third order run, what is it?

[Dan Bernstein]

Third order record.

[Co-host]

Third order record is. So that. That takes into consideration quality of opponent. Quality of opponent. Yeah. So in case you've never heard that before.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yep.

[Co-host]

It's more than just run differential, but.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, that's. It's an enhanced run differential is what it is. It's like super Pythagorean. And they've outplayed that by. By 1.3 wins.

[Co-host]

You have. You have all the. Do you have the division in front of you or is that just the Cubs?

[Dan Bernstein]

I do.

[Co-host]

What's the. What's the rest of the division by?

[Dan Bernstein]

Third order record.

[Co-host]

Yeah. I'm curious to see where the brewers sit.

[Dan Bernstein]

The brewers are right on theirs, actually. Yeah. They're at 22 and 16. Their third order record is 22 and 16.

[Co-host]

And are they. They throw. They three or three and a half behind the Cubs.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes, three and a half. I believe the biggest differential that you see is the Reds. The Reds are playing five games ahead of their run differential, their adjusted run differential. The reds should be 17 and 24.

[Co-host]

Yeah. And at a negative 33 run differential with 14 bases loaded, walks.

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't. Still don't know. That's possible. I know I don't know. You remember what you said somebody would get fired?

[Co-host]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes. If that were true, somebody would have been fired already.

[Co-host]

No one's been fired.

[Dan Bernstein]

No one's been fired. And let the record show, you know, the NBA playoffs are easy money at my bookie if you stop overthinking it. You don't need a crazy parlay, no spreadsheets. You just need a team you trust. And that's why playoff basketball hits so well at my bookie. You got a clean board. You want to keep it simple, you can. That's it for the Lakers. So they are out. And nobody's favorite team, the Oklahoma City Thunder, look like they're on track for something as well. I just. I don't know anybody who roots for the Thunder.

[Co-host]

Do you know, I don't know many people that root for many basketball team to begin with.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay. I just. I don't know any of the Thunder just don't engender a lot of like, yeah, I'm a Thunder fan. I don't know. I did. They're. They're really good. And everybody they put in, even if you haven't heard of them, they're good.

[Co-host]

And they're the defending champs, right? No.

[Dan Bernstein]

Last year. Yeah, they'll probably win this year. They probably will. But they're annoying. And the way. The way SGA plays is annoying, but that's really not the point. Pick a team, back the team, and then you can let the playoffs do the rest. If you're new to my bookie, if you've never made a deposit, there's even less reason to sit this one out. And that's because our code DBU is Dan Bernstein. Unfiltered, allows you for any bet you choose up to $500 to be fully covered. Meaning you make your play and if it doesn't hit, you get it right back because you've opted in using the bet back bonus token that you get with the code dbu. So pick your squad, take the shot. Don't just watch the playoffs, cash in on them. Only at my bookie Bobby Cox will be remembered in this series in Atlanta. And while we're talking about managers and coaches, I thought I would ask this. The Much like the many things in baseball that are evolving away, like you were talking before, the idea of the closer, you're one guy who gets your saves. We know that's going away right now. You know what else is gone? And that is something for which Bobby Cox was well known because he liked to get kicked out of games a lot. Just what he did. Sometimes he wanted to get kicked out and he would just yell something from the bench and get out of here. There's no real on field arguments anymore between managers and umpires. Does anybody miss it? I don't really. There was a lot of entertainment over the years. There's the silly performative circus act. It was entertaining. Lou Piniella famously throwing all the bats or picking up the bass. Earl Weaver kicking dirt or famously Terry Bevington. I was saying foul. He was saying fair. And I was saying fair and he was saying foul. I didn't know what I was saying. That won't happen anymore.

[Co-host]

No.

[Dan Bernstein]

Because we're never going to have anybody as stupid as Terry Bevington doing this job.

[Co-host]

Well, that's. Yeah, that's. That's exactly right on that.

[Dan Bernstein]

I mean, never.

[Co-host]

But you're losing a lot of the arguments because of replay and now abs because they're. Which is, that's what's caused a lot of the arguments.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right. And now they're saying, well, you're wrong, you're right. And even if it's not right or wrong, as we noticed in the Cubs game the other night when we. Somebody was tagged out at the plate and was called safe, maybe by the absolute letter of the law, they didn't have enough evidence to see exactly when the tag was applied. And they probably knew yet it might have been applied, but we can't rule that it was applied. And Craig Counsel's like, okay, yeah, they got it wrong, but what am I going to do about it? I'm going to go scream and kick dirt on his shoes. What do you want me to do? Really? If we're done with that, that's fine. It's fine. There's a lot of hills for you to die on. When it comes to change, that isn't one that really bugs me all that much.

[Co-host]

Well, yeah, I mean, without having, you know, discussed this earlier, it's just you have. The game is changing. The way the game is understood, the way you learn about the game, your own players is all changing with data and information. And there's so much more to it now that a manager doesn't need to insert himself into the game any longer. Which that that old school approach was like, you hired a guy for his personality and for his demeanor and the way he would go out and argue with umpires. That was all part of being a manager where now it's just, it's different. I mean, like what's expected and needed of a manager is much different than back then.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, the. I think the comp is like hockey fighting almost. When you start talking about a vestige of something.

[Co-host]

Well, we've always thought hockey fighting was stupid.

[Dan Bernstein]

Of course it was stupid. But so is kicking dirt on an umpire's shoes. Oh, no, not dirt. Dirt on my shoes. Whatever will I do now? Does that ruin his day? Is that the biggest sign? I kick dirt on me. I fart in your general direction. Right.

[Co-host]

It's just a sign of disrespect. I dirtied your shoes.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right. Look at this. Ha ha ha ha. You'll never recover from this. Now your shoes are dusty.

[Co-host]

Well, I think because we're still forced to listen.

[Dan Bernstein]

Go away or I shall taunt you a second time.

[Co-host]

I mean, we're still, we're still forced, if you want to watch the games, to. To hear from John Smoltz, who is, you know, part of that, that, that long gone era.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, but he wants abs full time.

[Co-host]

Well, he. I know that's where you guys are. I know it's.

[Dan Bernstein]

I'm ready to get. To give like he's wearing 3, 1, 2 stuff. I'll give a big hug and a smooch.

[Co-host]

But I think that that kind of philosophy, that mentality was managers managed by feelings and their instinct. And you don't do that because you don't have to.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right.

[Co-host]

Because you have information.

[Dan Bernstein]

And a lot of those feelings, you know what they are the wrong, wrong and bad.

[Co-host]

It's like, you know, you know, like, I went with this matchup because I felt good about this guy. Well, what does the data tell you?

[Dan Bernstein]

Right? Congratulations.

[Co-host]

What does the information tell you? Let's go that route.

[Dan Bernstein]

Throw out that book. I don't need no stupid stinking book.

[Co-host]

Right? And you know what? And you don't need. It's not football either. Like, you don't need some rah rah speech to motivate a baseball player. I mean, baseball players are the mentally

[Dan Bernstein]

get a hit, right? What are you going to do?

[Co-host]

Okay, Like a baseball player goes over seven, they know, hey, you know what? I got a bunch of hits right around the corner.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I had a bad week.

[Co-host]

Right? It's fine.

[Dan Bernstein]

Hitting's hard.

[Co-host]

I've had a bad series. But you know What? I could hit 600 the next day.

[Dan Bernstein]

Anybody can hit anything. It's the Voros McCracken rule. Any major league player can hit anything over 60 plate appearances. Anything. Yeah, any player can hit anything over 60 plate appearances.

[Co-host]

Yeah. And then, you know, really, when it comes down to it, what's a manager give you in a season?

[Dan Bernstein]

Steadiness.

[Co-host]

I mean, there are people that argue, oh, you know, you can get five extra wins, you know, two and a half, whatever.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, maybe two and a half. That's. But either way, the I don't miss.

[Co-host]

And that's. That's a discount. The job that obviously. We just made an argument about Craig Counsel. Yeah, but not at all. But you know, you're talking about arguments and sure. Were they fun and entertaining? Great. But yeah, I'd rather have the game move along and continue.

[Dan Bernstein]

You know what it seems like to me, it seems like a waste of time and energy.

[Co-host]

Definitely time and all that.

[Dan Bernstein]

All that emotion, all that energy. And then they. Then they find you for it automatically.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

They got to pay to do that. Think about that. Think about it. If you had to pay beforehand, like youe like, feed bills into a machine or you can't go out and argue.

[Co-host]

Are you paying advance? And then if like whatever you don't

[Dan Bernstein]

do, you get it back for a pizza party.

[Co-host]

That'd be good. Yeah, that.

[Dan Bernstein]

Everybody has a big pizza party with the money you don't use. Yeah. You didn't argue. You did a really good job not arguing. And they come in there.

[Co-host]

Have you have you heard and did someone write say something about missing the show and the act of.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, it's just that I've noticed it with abs.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

What do you.

[Co-host]

Because you can't argue that anymore.

[Dan Bernstein]

And over the course, what do you do?

[Co-host]

Are you the machine?

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, especially how it builds. Arguing machine. How over the course of a game like it would get. You're having a bad night, dude. Nico Horner got kicked out of a game. Who did he say to you? Like, you're having a rough one out there, Steve.

[Co-host]

It was last year. Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Like, get out of here. You can't tell me I'm having a bad night.

[Co-host]

Right. And that's when yeah, Craig came out and was like, hey, all he said was, you're having a bad day.

[Dan Bernstein]

We all have bad days, man. It's okay. But you don't have that now. You don't have. We got into the ninth inning and everything's gone against you. Like, you still haven't basketball even. You still have these guys. Like, we didn't shoot enough free throws in a series. Or they don't call that. Or they let him and you still have that.

[Co-host]

Speaking of which, that's a bickerstaff. Was complaining last night.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, they're going to. Of course they're still going to do that.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

I was thinking about this and we mentioned it briefly while we're talking about changes in the way coaches and managers carry themselves. So when Anthony Edwards two nights ago. Oh, yeah, he's going crazy, right. Like Donovan Mitchell last night. Sometimes the NBA star just is on a heater. He's heating up and he makes the three. And he runs by Mitch Johnson and rubs his belly. And it was cute. And it was like, look at me. You can't stop me, coach. And then I'm thinking, the games that I covered, if there are a lot of like Pat Riley games in there and Phil Jackson, these guys, big dudes in a suit. If somebody had done that, if, like Reggie Miller. Yeah, Reggie Miller.

[Co-host]

Pacers are playing the Bulls.

[Dan Bernstein]

And if, if Reggie Miller did that to Phil Jackson, that would have been an international incident.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

If Phil is standing there looking like the human coat hanger and Reggie hits a three and he comes. Actually, he should be there. I was shot lefty. I had to make sure his hands crossed at the end. He comes running by. Hey, Phil. Hey, Big chief. Triangle.

[Co-host]

Oh, it would have been.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, that would have been like benches clearing, all out war. Robert Parrish would have stood up.

[Co-host]

James Edwards would have.

[Dan Bernstein]

That would have been crazy. Think about Riley.

[Co-host]

Raleigh rally would have swung at a guy, right.

[Dan Bernstein]

If Michael Jordan. If Michael Jordan hits one tongue out instead of the shrug, goes over to Pat Riley and gives him a playful wink and a. But he would never have done that.

[Co-host]

No, because Michael was.

[Dan Bernstein]

The fact that Anthony Edwards does it and is still silly is great. Yeah, I love that. I love that he's goofy. He's not like Scotty Barnes goofy. Have you seen some of the compilation videos of Scotty Barnes? No. Oh, my God, you will love him forever. He's the best. There's one where these people are in a car and there's this guy roller skating. And the person in the car goes, hey, it's Scotty Barnes. And Scotty Barnes is trying not to fall down. He's on some country road.

[Co-host]

I have skinny just goes like, hi, I've seen videos.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, he's hilarious. He's absolutely hilarious. See, he would do something like that, but I just, I can't. And I don't know, I think it would be real easy to sort of stir that into player empowerment or that just shows today these players can do whatever they want. And the players, players have too much power. These, all these young coaches now they're not like they used to be. Because there are people who think the coaches should wear suits again. And I don't care what you wear. Who gives a shit? Go ahead, wear what you think looks good, man. If you want your quarter zip, wear a quarter zip. If you want to wear your $5,000

[Co-host]

suit as you wear your funeral.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes. Take care of old Joe from Evanston. Do that.

[Co-host]

See, now I'm that guy, though. I want the guys. And I miss the suits.

[Dan Bernstein]

Why not?

[Co-host]

I like the suits. NBA guys. Like, they looked sharp.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, I love the arms race, too. I love the fact that that became a thing like Chuck Daly. And it wasn't just the suit. I remember standing next to Rick Pitino in an elevator. I was standing next to Rick Pitino in an elevator. And the quality of his suit, it's like, I don't know anything about suit, the garment business even, like, genetically. I'm supposed to, right? Like I'm. I'm supposed to be. Supposed to be great with numbers and know the diamond business and. See, I can't do that while also being in charge of the international banking conspiracy. I just. I don't have the band. I don't know. But so the schmata that he had on in the elevator, I remember like. Like I was getting lost in the quality of the. Of the fabric. It's like it had. It was like, shining a little bit, and then you're like, oh, ooh, that's inlaid. Like, there's a tiny gold threading that ran through it. And that's why it was like the

[Co-host]

perfectly tailored handmade shirts.

[Dan Bernstein]

I swear to God, 5,000 even then is probably no exaggeration. Yeah, Just impeccable, man.

[Co-host]

I loved it. I loved it.

[Dan Bernstein]

And the watches. Yeah, like the everything. The pocket squares were all perfect. So I would not mind if coaches kind of got.

[Co-host]

Yeah, I would like that. I know they still wear suits and hockey, right? NHL coaches. Are they all wearing suits and ties?

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know.

[Co-host]

What about wnba? What are the coaches wearing there? I know they're two games in their season. You've been tracking that?

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know, but that wouldn't bother me. I think it would be a. Just for games. Like, you'd have to go to practice like that. You don't have to go.

[Co-host]

Well, yeah, of course not.

[Dan Bernstein]

Dunkin Donuts, a drive through looking like that. But, you know, you come out looking when I start hearing that old, you know, Round ball rock NBC theme, which does sound great.

[Co-host]

No, it does. It really does. Yeah. And I want. I want guys in suits again.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay. Yeah, you're.

[Co-host]

No, yeah, I've always been a. I love it. I love the NBA suit, guys.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well, you know who is believed to be one of the. The primary reasons why the casual progress accelerated?

[Co-host]

Is it Billy Donovan?

[Dan Bernstein]

It's Fred Hoiberg.

[Co-host]

Oh, is it really?

[Dan Bernstein]

Because, remember, he had the heart procedure and he couldn't wear a closed neck with a tie, so he was. He started wearing a jacket with a, like a mock turtleneck. And then he got a special dispensation or easement of some kind to do that. And then people just like, all right, whatever.

[Co-host]

What is a. He had a heart procedure.

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know. Look it up. Look it up. There was something where he couldn't have his airway.

[Co-host]

That sounds fishy.

[Dan Bernstein]

Where he's just like, oh, I can't.

[Co-host]

I can't wear a tie anymore because I have this heart condition. And who's gonna question that? All right, Fred.

[Dan Bernstein]

My doctor wrote me note.

[Co-host]

No more neckties and eat more chicken.

[Dan Bernstein]

No, this. My doctor wrote me a note. It says, Fred gets pajamas.

[Co-host]

Yes.

[Dan Bernstein]

Signed Fred's doctor.

[Co-host]

I wonder who's.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Co-host]

That sounds sketchy.

[Dan Bernstein]

Fred, why are you in pajamas? It was sort of like after Covid, when every like high school aged boy had the, like plaid zubaz pants, the giant hair, doing the thing.

[Co-host]

Oh, they still do. And their pajama pants and hoodies and sweatpants and.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, hoodie plaid Zubaz.

[Co-host]

Oh, they're not Zubas.

[Dan Bernstein]

They are, though.

[Co-host]

But they're. No, they're pajama pants.

[Dan Bernstein]

They're pajama pants.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. All of a sudden they just started wearing that.

[Co-host]

That's still the outfit now and then. Really? And then the baggier the sweatpants and hoodies, the better now.

[Dan Bernstein]

But not emo hoodie. It's gotta be like there's a rotation of the various hoodies that are worn regardless of what the outside temperature.

[Co-host]

Yeah, well, they don't wear coats.

[Dan Bernstein]

Right. But they, they. It has nothing to do with how warm or cold it actually is, ever.

[Co-host]

No.

[Dan Bernstein]

And then when asked, the answer is always fine. That would be high school. You're not even at high school age yet.

[Co-host]

No, no, but it's, it's, it's. It's junior high now. It's middle school. That, that starts.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay.

[Co-host]

I saw a kid the other day coming out of school, was wearing jeans. Yeah. I was like, what's wrong with that kid? Didn't get the memo that you can Just wear pajama pants.

[Dan Bernstein]

I. They were. There were guys I went to college with who wore coats and ties to class.

[Co-host]

Well, we kind of had to at Moody, so I didn't have a choice.

[Dan Bernstein]

Did you?

[Co-host]

Oh, yeah. I wore a tie every day.

[Dan Bernstein]

Wow.

[Co-host]

I didn't know you had to wear a collared shirt. But I took the extra step.

[Dan Bernstein]

I did not know that.

[Co-host]

Yeah, I always had a tie on.

[Dan Bernstein]

Did you know that when you went there, when you chose the school?

[Co-host]

Yeah. I mean, yeah, you weren't going in shorts or sweatpants. You had to wear nice pants and a button down shirt or polo at minimum. But, you know, we always wouldn't.

[Dan Bernstein]

Look. I kind of, you know, that's. I kind of don't mind that. I've got a little old school in me when it comes to.

[Co-host]

Yeah, you don't mind it for other people.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, I'm not. I've got my 3, 1, 2 quarter zip on. Are you kidding?

[Co-host]

Well, he's like, which fishing shirt am I wearing today?

[Dan Bernstein]

I wish I had six of these. These are awesome. Yeah, I know.

[Co-host]

Probably get more.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, well, we get a DBU one. We can get an off the Ivy one. Have big organizations like a bright red OWC one.

[Co-host]

Yeah, I think the fans want you to get an FU one too.

[Dan Bernstein]

Look, if we made it. If we made it available, somebody would definitely grab it. There's no doubt. Okay. I want to do this story and I've been meaning to do this story because I recommended a book several weeks ago and you have. I gave it to you.

[Co-host]

Yeah, I have it now. I put it right to my bag. I'm gonna start it tonight. I have. The boys are at an outdoor practice that I did. Have you heard? Have you been to Lake Forest Academy prep school? Like, it's a. You can, like you can live there. You can live on campus as a. Even I. For like a high school kid.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, it's a boarding school, so they do.

[Co-host]

They have nice turf fields and they do practices there.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, I know. I haven't been there.

[Co-host]

And it's just. It's not worth the dropping off. Going home, going back.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, you can do the hang.

[Co-host]

So I'm just going to hang and that's. I'm going to sit in the car and read the book. So that's all started tonight.

[Dan Bernstein]

Okay. It moves fast. Well, yeah.

[Co-host]

Did you read it? Like two hours?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host]

Okay, well, I'm not going to do that, but.

[Dan Bernstein]

Oh, my God, it's. It is. There are so many laugh out loud moments in. Carl. Hiaasen's. Fever Beach. And then I saw a story cross that would have fit in nicely to the Hyacinth Universe. And it happened to take place in Hawaii. And I never thought that I would be bringing you a story from Surfer.com which exists.

[Co-host]

That's a first.

[Dan Bernstein]

But this is from Surfer.com because apparently this story made news in surfing circles, as it were. And there are pictures, there is a video accompanying all of this. So, yes, this is indeed real. This happened. Vile behavior spread across the Internet as scenes of a man throwing a large rock at an endangered monk seal on Maui began to circulate. The man was reportedly found following the incident, and some citizen justice was issued. He got what he deserved. The video says he threw a big ass rock at a sea lion and proceeded to say, I'm rich, I can pay the fines. Okay, so this tourist, this is an endangered seal, not a sea lion, it's an endangered monk seal. And someone said, hey, don't do that. He said, I'm rich, I can pay the fines. Meanwhile, an unidentified gentleman begins wailing on him. And that is indeed what happened, that this guy threw a rock at an endangered seal. And somebody there's like, hey, hey, hey, what are you doing? He said, I'm rich. I can pay the fines. And the guy who beat him up also said, on top of that, he shoved my girlfriend. In addition to the community retribution, government officials are looking to take legal action against the offender. This is Maui Mayor Richard Bisson. By now we've all heard about the disturbing incident against our friend Lonnie, the Hawaiian monk seal. So this, this, this monk seal was a known resident of this area. A resident of their community? He said. Like many in our community, I was shocked by what happened. Lonnie is not just a seal to us. She is, is part of our ocean ohana here in Lahaina. Many of our residents know her, watch over her, and care deeply about her. As for the citizen justice that was dished out, he appeared to approve. Mayor Bisson continued, I want to mahalo everyone who stepped in, protected her, and reported this unacceptable behavior. As mayor, I not only have a responsibility to protect the people of Maui county, but also the wildlife and animals that share these islands with us.

[Co-host]

Yeah, you don't fuck around, like with the environment in Hawaii especially.

[Dan Bernstein]

And he added, let me be clear. This is not the type of visitor we welcome on Maui. Behavior like this will not be tolerated. I assure you. I will see to it personally that this individual is prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Whether at the county, state, or federal level, there must be consequences. Lonnie, we have your back. And per Hawaii's Department of Land and Resources, violations could result in federal criminal charges of up to $50,000 and. Or time in jail. You should go to jail, I think, especially for this guy who said, I'm rich, I can pay the fines. A judge presented with that can act on that.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

A judge say, okay, well, punishment is designed to deter. It's designed to be. Is retributive, and it's deterrent. And in this case, to make sure you get the point, if you're going to brag about being rich, we're going to give you the maximum and whatever aggravating circumstances would allow us to add to this. And you know what? Take a week in the pokey with you.

[Co-host]

Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I think, I think if there's any.

[Dan Bernstein]

Or if it's Hawaii, a week in the poke.

[Co-host]

Oh, boy. Yeah. I think anytime there's a fine imposed on someone, we can.

[Dan Bernstein]

The poke.

[Co-host]

Yeah, I get it. It's like a pokeball. Yeah. It should be the, the fine should, should run in alignment with what your, your income is. So, like, if you brag about it, double for sure. But anybody, I mean, what do you.

[Dan Bernstein]

Who thinks that? Who decides, hey, there's a ceiling. I'm going to take a huge rock and go try to injure it. My God, man.

[Co-host]

So a monk seal is the only earless seal that's found in tropical climates. I know that. I'd never heard of a monk seal before. It's awfully cute, though, too.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host]

If I saw a guy throwing a rock at a seal, would you intervene?

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes.

[Co-host]

Yeah, 100%.

[Dan Bernstein]

I get bothered here outside when I see people misbehaving on the lakeshore, treating things I don't, I don't know. I don't want to get started with fishing pet peeves. But I do wish that there was a greater sense of minimal impact on the environment. When you fish, when you walk, just don't. Littering bothers me. And people who I always try to pick up after other fishermen if they're leaving packs of the plastic, pack of swivels or a discarded lure or a jig tail that's broken and people just set it there. Always, always, always pick it up because it's the least you can do to give back to the natural resources that we're very, very blessed to have.

[Co-host]

But what kind of an asshole is throwing a rock at a seal?

[Dan Bernstein]

I don't know. I don't Know, man. Have you.

[Co-host]

Speaking of seals, have you seen the story come out with the last week or two, there's a seal and it's. Again, like, in. Seals is pretty commonly where they're naturally in an area all the time. They get named by, like, the community.

[Dan Bernstein]

They hang out with you.

[Co-host]

There's one in San Francisco area that

[Dan Bernstein]

and this Pier 39.

[Co-host]

Elephant seal, like, 10 times the size of any other seal.

[Dan Bernstein]

Elephant seal. Yeah.

[Co-host]

And so there was, like. I saw a video of it last week. There was, like, 15 seals laying on this pier. And this bro that they all know, whatever his name was, he like, comes up, dude, and he's fucking huge. Like, I've never seen a seal this big before. And when he gets up on the pier, everyone else bails.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah.

[Co-host]

They all just. They all just leave.

[Dan Bernstein]

Big Daddy's back.

[Co-host]

He's fucking huge.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yep. It's got to be Pier 39, because that's sort of famously where they are. You get. It's like. It's the wharf area with the, you know, boudin bread and the guy. The famous Dungeness crab crackers.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

With the plastic. Whatever those mallets are made of that whole thing. So that's probably what it is. But. Yeah, I don't. I don't. I don't really understand what that does. Throw a rock. Watch this.

[Co-host]

Okay. Yeah, that's exactly what it is, dude. It's. He's a stellar sea lion. And it's not like he's not, like, really cool, especially.

[Dan Bernstein]

That's what he's not like a stellar sea eagle.

[Co-host]

Is it the same stellar, stellar sea lion. He's nicknamed Chonkers. And he's been dominating the K dock at San Francisco's Pier 39, causing other, smaller California sea lions to scatter when he arrives.

[Dan Bernstein]

And doing this all while coaching the Chiefs is remarkable.

[Co-host]

I don't know how he keeps his sub sandwich dry underwater. He comes. He's got a foot long. I got to see if I can find the video for this so you can see this guy. He's fucking huge.

[Dan Bernstein]

Well. And if he comes over to lie down, everybody else gets out of the way.

[Co-host]

I don't know. They call him Chonkers Reed. I don't know why. Look at that picture.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yes, sir.

[Co-host]

That's a big boy. Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

That man has been getting a lot of hand feeding, I think. I don't think he's. I don't think he's doing his own hunting for fish. Yeah. I think somebody's taking care of the meals for chonkers.

[Co-host]

That is a big fucking dude.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah, well, they call him an elephant seal for a reason. They're very large animals.

[Co-host]

Well, what did you say he was a sea massive. So Stellar sea lion.

[Dan Bernstein]

Is that the same Stellar that named the Stellar sea eagle? I have to know this because the stellar sea eagle is. I've seen one at the San Diego Zoo and it made me feel weird. I kind of wanted it to be out and flying around, but some of those. Flying around, you know. But he's. I think its wing was. Its flying wings were damaged.

[Co-host]

Okay. So that's the species. A Steller sea lion. I've never heard of that before. And then a Steller's sea eagle.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. Did Stellar get to name all these things? Because apparently the birds are gonna get their names changed, so. No, this is.

[Co-host]

So that's a Steller's sea eagle. S T E L L E R apostrophe. S Steller's sea eagle. This is a Stellar S T E L L A R seal.

[Dan Bernstein]

So it is a judgment of it. Okay. Because Steller's refers to species named after 18th century German naturalist Georg Wilhelm Steller.

[Co-host]

All right. And if I saw one of these things fly in, I'd fucking hide. That is terrifying looking.

[Dan Bernstein]

They're big. Look at that thing.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

It looks like the Sam the eagle from the Muppets.

[Co-host]

Oh, man.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. Yeah, they're big. I think.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

I think they, like him eat dolphins.

[Co-host]

No, that's. That's fucking scary.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. I mean they. That. That beak is. Is not to be messed with.

[Co-host]

Not interested.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yep. I wonder. And they. I think they eat just fish. Is that right? I don't know. Because it looks like they could take your pets away.

[Co-host]

And it says toddlers.

[Dan Bernstein]

I would be careful if one gets loose around you. That I'd get everybody inside because they're very, very large.

[Co-host]

Oh, and they make deep barking noises too. I'm good. That's. Fuck that. I move.

[Dan Bernstein]

Look at that bird. Woof.

[Co-host]

Woof. Okay. Why are you packing as I'm leaving.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. Getting out of here.

[Co-host]

Yeah.

[Dan Bernstein]

They mainly feed on fish.

[Co-host]

Salmon and trout.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. Yep.

[Co-host]

Wow. Interesting.

[Dan Bernstein]

Yeah. There you go. So they're not related.

[Co-host]

You've learned stuff here about animals and things.

[Dan Bernstein]

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[Co-host]

You hear that? You hear that?

[Dan Bernstein]

We're going to have a big mountain here. Where's it going to go? Maybe. Maybe. Well, there it is. So find your angle, make your pick, and cash in at my bookie. That is today's Dan Bernstein unfiltered on 312 Sports. It has been brought to you in partnership with my bookie, Dan Bernstein unfiltered. Unfiltered on 312 sports. We have the tech to get food delivered in 15 minutes, but we all have horror stories about buying tickets. The GameTime app gives fans the advantage. Get amazing tickets in just a few taps. Fees are included, so what you see is what you pay. And the gametime guarantee means authentic tickets at the best price every time. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets to concerts, sports, comedy, and more with GameTime. Download the GameTime app and create an account for $20 off your first purchase terms apply.