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For your free quote, go to selectquote.com that's selectquote.com selectquote we shop, you save full details on example policies@SelectQuote.com hi friends, how are you today? Welcome to Dark History. Hey, listen, today I have a special spooky season treat just for you. I've gone into the Dark history archives and put together my favorite episodes that have a dark, twisted or supernatural element. The kind of stuff that's perfect for October, you know, candles lit, blankets on, cat nearby, seance maybe. I don't know. Let's get weird. First off, we have our episode on witches. Now in this episode we go all the way back, like medieval back. And we talk about how Europe fully lost their frickin mind. We're talking witch trials, the Malleus Maleficarum, AKA the original how to spot a witch manual, flying broomsticks, the whole works. It's completely unhinged. Okay, so let's get into it. Hi friends. Welcome to Halloween 2022. Ugh. My name is Bailey Sari and I'd like to welcome you to Dark History. This month we're gonna be talking about all things spooky. Ooky, like Satan, of course, clowns, mummies, and oh yeah, witch hunts. So sit back, relax, and let's talk about that hot, juicy history. But Halloween, Gus. Okay, let me have you clear your mind and I need you to think about the classic Halloween costumes. I mean, you know them, werewolves, vampires, nurses, naughty nurses, sexy felon, sexy Nun. Mm. You get it. Anyway, at the top of every Halloween costume list is usually the witch who hasn't been a witch at least once in their life. And if you're like, not me, then here's your permission to be a witch. Baby, join the club. This is my first time. I've never been a witch before. Naturally, I was like, I wanna do a story about witches. But, you know, look, it's a story that's been done a lot, and I'm not trying to downplay it or anything, right? But witches has been talked about a lot. Cauldrons, broomsticks, black cats, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know which side note, did you know? This is a little fun fact. The first story of a witch riding a broom was actually a man witch. Mm. It was a man witch. He was riding a broom. I don't know, it was just a little fun fact. I thought that was interesting. You're welcome. But there's something even darker that is associated with witches. Something that's been used to target and murder, murder thousands of women over the centuries. Some even dare to call it a genocide. Because, you see, without witches, we don't have this thing called witch hunts. Witch. I just realized I witch, you hear, repeated way too much on the news every single night. Right. Anyway, this got me thinking that the word witch hunt is thrown around a lot today, but was it ever used to describe, you know, hunts for actual witches? Spoiler alert. It very much was used to describe that. And the rabbit hole. I went down on Google. My freaking gosh. It took me not into just the history of witches, but I learned a whole lot of horribly shocking and grim stories about how the idea of the witch hunt was invented and then used to, let's say, burn any woman alive who dared to take a stroll late at night alone. And if you had a mole. Good luck, sweaty. Sweetie. So sit back. So sit back in your armchair of inquiries and don't worry, that will make sense later. And buckle up, because, listen, we're about to learn a spine chilling story about how brutal human beings can be to one another. But let's start at the beginning. Where does the idea of witches even come from? It's around the 8th century BC when we're first introduced to a quote unquote witch. Now, according to Greek mythology, Circe was an enchantress from ancient Greece. Now, it was said that she was very beautiful, she was smart, and she lived alone on a beautiful island in the Mediterranean. Love that for her. But rumor had it that she was actually A witch. Not the ugly, green, warty witch we think of today. Nene. She, Cersei, was sexy. She was hot. Smoking hot. Men just wanted to feel her hot bod when they saw her. They had this overwhelming sensation of lust. Men would visit the island, see her farm, see all of her land. And then they were caught off guard because all of a sudden she would start saying some random weird chants and stuff. And according to one story, Circe invited a bunch of sailors to a banquet. Like, oh, you've been sailing for a while, you must be tired. Come in for some ice cold lemonade. But little did the sailors know that Circe cursed the food with her magic and she transformed all of the men into pigs. Yeah, actual pigs, like the animal, leaving them trapped forever in their new pig bods. So creating fear around women seems to have started all the way back with Circe, because many believe they're up to something and trying to destroy men. But before tv, radio, twitter, social media, all of that, you know, ideas were shared and spread through the towns, the cities, the people, through art. One very influential artist in the Middle Ages was a German printmaker named Albrecht. He was a big deal because he was associated with all of the greats. I'm talking about all the Ninja Turtles, Raphael, Leonardo da Vinci, et cetera. Yep, he started out doing oil painting, portraits, self portraits. I mean, he was an art machine. You may even recognize one of his most famous pieces of art, the praying hands. You know, the hands that everyone has tattooed on them. Drake used, used it on like one of his album covers, those hands. Anyhow, Albrecht, he was also great at engraving beautiful art into wood. Oh yeah, it was really pretty. Churches would commission pieces from him. I mean, this man was just popping, he was everywhere. His art people are loving it, they're losing their shit. And then he eventually moves on and starts making prints of his art, which is wild because prints weren't even like a thing yet. One of his most famous prints depicted something quite terrifying, something people haven't seen yet. What was it, you ask? Well, it was a buff ass woman, she obviously lifts, who seemed to be like commanding a creepy ass goat. It was a witch. Now this was a creepy ass witch who was riding a devil looking goat backwards. This woman is ugly, she's old, her titties are super low. But Albrecht would be the man we thank for creating the witch we all know and think of today like the old hag, the ugly witch don't come for me. That's just what he actually like, wanted this art to depict it was like an ugly hag. Before, some witches in mythology were more beautiful, like Circe. But again, this guy Alberich was like, nah, witches are ugly. So he had a bunch of paintings showcasing ugly older women in his art. So this guy was probably just hurt by some woman. Let's be honest. He was probably heartbroken and was like, I'm gonna get her and all women ever, you know. And it worked. Cause these prints were pretty scandalous. They created a lot of fear in people to be wary of these sneaky ass witches. And by witches, I mean women. And when people are afraid of something because, you know, fear, it can make people do some really crazy things. So let me introduce you to target number one, our friend Helena. So the year is 1485. There were rumors going around town saying that this woman Helena, killed a man's wife by using magic. Oh, shit. Word is spreading quickly and people are believing it. Helena's reputation in the neighborhood was already considered outspoken. She was promiscuous, and she hung out with, like, some sketchy people. That's what everyone's talking about. I don't know. I wasn't there. But that's what's said. So obviously Helaena gets fingers pointed at her. Everyone in town is calling her a witch. And Helaena was swearing up and down that she was innocent and that none of the rumors were true. But she had a hunch where all of this was coming from. She does something bold and says, dear everybody listening to me right now, I'm not the witch. You're the evil one. The guy that was accusing Helaena of being a witch and who essentially started the whole rumor was this man that Helena was accusing of assaulting her. And she was like, he's the bad guy. He's the guy that you guys should go over. So the man that Helena was pointing her finger at was a man named Heinrich Kramer. Now, Heinrich, naturally did not like this woman who was making wild claims that he assaulted her. So he goes in harder, and he's not gonna back down. It's what we know today as, like, gaslighting. This Heinrich guy was gaslighting Helena. Nobody was listening to her. She must have felt like she was going crazy. Everyone's calling her a witch. She's pointing the finger back like, I'm not the witch. This guy is the douche. Point the finger at him. It's just an endless circle jerk. So then Helaena had to stand trial, and she was being accused of witchcraft. So how does one confirm that Helaena is indeed a witch. Well, at this time, they couldn't decide and agree on what the definition of a witch was. Therefore, Helena was released because nobody could come to an agreement on what she was other than a loudmouth. Heinrich, the guy that was calling her a witch in the first place, was the prosecutor on this trial. And when Helena was released, he was pissed. It said that he left town quite embarrassed and ashamed of himself. He couldn't show his face around town anymore because he was just seen as a loser. But sometimes being a loser can inspire you. You know, you improvise, adapt, and overcome. And Heinrich was ready for his redemption. And how was he gonna get that? Well, by getting back at Helena. The best way to get back at her was by creating a way to universally identify, locate, and destroy witches. So do you ever, like, put on a cute outfit and you're feeling yourself and you're like, yeah. Mm. Mm. But then you realize, like, ah, you don't have the right bra. You know, maybe you're getting the granny panty lines, you know, maybe it's bunching all funny, and you're like, damn it. Like, it's ruining the look. Well, that used to happen to me all the time until I found skims, and everything changed. Skims make supportive, actually comfortable undergarments that fit your body like a second skin. Now I'm obsessed with their fits. Everybody scoop Bralette. Because, look, I have calcium cannons, you could say. And usually the Bralettes, you just fall out of them, you know? You know what I'm saying? It does nothing for. Does nothing for me. I get scared by Bralettes. I'm like, it's not going to work for these cannons. But this one, the skims one, it actually gives me, like, shape and support without squeezing the life out of me. Now, I used to hate thongs. Don't even get me started on that. You know, it's just like, where'd it go? I don't know. It's in there somewhere. But with their fits, everybody thong. It's like, nothing's there. Am I wearing anything? You kind of. You forget. And it's. It's great. You know, the fabric is, like. It's buttery soft, and it stays in place. It's not doing something funky on you. It just. It does what it needs to do, and that's all we're asking for. Honestly, before skims, I just kind of accepted that bras and undies were. They're just meant to be annoying, you know? But it doesn't have to be like that. Get yourself some skims, because let's be honest, life is too short for bad underwear. Shop my favorite bras and underwear@skims.com after you place your order, be sure to let them know I sent you select podcast in the survey and then be sure to select my show in the dropdown menu that follows. Thanks. So Heinrich goes on a little writer's retreat. He spends some time away, like in a cabin. He's working on a book that he he believes could possibly change the world. Heinrich. He ends up working with another writer and together they bang out what would become known as essentially the witch hunting Bible. It's called Melius Maleficarum, which translates to the hammer of witches. Yikes. Unfortunately, their little burn book comes out at the perfect time. It was soon after the invention of the printing press, so it was more widely distributed than really anything else, except for maybe the Bible. Yeah, this book was honestly a hit and it was the foundation on how to find a witch. What witches did, what to do with the witch, like once you caught it, and why you should fear witches in general. Here are some highlights so you don't have to read it. So 1. How do you spot a witch? Easy. 10 helpful hints. 1. Is she a woman? It was believed that women were much easier for the devil to tempt because obviously men are so big and strong and women weak. According to the book, midwives especially were witches because they murdered and consumed babies. Allegedly. 2. Does it look like a witch? The book mentions an old crone like woman or an old lady hobbling along the road. If you spot that, that's a witch. Another way to locate a witch, put a Bible next to her. What happens? Well, according to Heinrich's book, if she stood on a scale and weighed less than a stack of Bibles, she was a witch. But this low key was a trap. Because look, in some places you were a witch if you weighed more than the Bibles. And then there were other places where if you weigh less than the Bibles, you were a witch. It was just a lose lose situation. You know, the only way you could be found innocent was if you matched the weight of the Bibles Exactly. That means you're not a witch. But okay, you know, it's just. What is this? Come on. Nobody wins. Is what I'm getting at another sign. If she's a witch, I'm saying she because, let's be real, it's always a she. Does she talk to herself? A person was potentially a witch if she specifically she, not he, if she was caught Talking to herself. Oh, yeah. Witch. Oh, and does she have a mark? More specifically, a mole or a wart. Now, this didn't have to be on the face. It could be anywhere on the body. So the accusers could strip you naked and search your whole body for, like, a mole, a wart, a mark. Hot. If any woman tried to get the mole removed, the scar was enough to prove that she was a witch. Indeed, the mole or birthmark was believed to be a sign of a witch pact. When confronted with this evidence, you could be hanged and burned. Isn't that scary? Just a mole. God damn it. Here's another way to find a witch. Does she have freckles? Ah. If a woman has freckles, she would be pricked with a knife blade or needle. If she didn't bleed. Witch. Now, the catch with this one, there were official prickers. Yeah. People who were officially the prickers. And they would use knives with retractable blades to make it appear a woman was stabbed, but no blood would, like, be found on her. And they'd be like, oh, she's a witch. Side note, I think they invented the retractable blades for this. And isn't that magic? Like, where did the blade go? None of it makes sense. Another way to identify a witch. Could she recite the Lord's Prayer? It was believed witches could not say holy words. Oh, shit. So these quote, unquote, witches would be asked to recite the Lord's Prayer without mistake to prove their innocence. During one witch trial, there was a woman, she accidentally said, quote, lead us into temptation. End quote. She forgot the not. Lead us not into temptation. So she was hanged, you know? Yeah. Lead us into temptation, girl. What a way to mess that up. So let's just do a little recap on what we learned. You weigh less than a stack of Bibles, witch. You weigh more than a stack of Bibles. You're a witch. You got a weird mole. You're a witch. Are you talking to yourself? Witch. Stutter during prayer time. Which bleed out of your vagina. Which breathe. Witch. You know, so in Heinrich's book, this mm book, I'm gonna call it Mm. Cause I can't say malamunevisinki. So his book, there's a big emphasis on how witches had a, shall we say, intimate relationship with the devil. Oh, yeah. They followed all of his commands, allegedly. But witches, they could even sleep with the devil and have, like, a big old evil satanic orgy. Yeah, that was in the book that witches are having orgies with the devil. I know. Sounds like fun. Where do you sign up? You know, like. But that's kind of where a lot of the fear was brewing from. Because at this time, the church was really starting to put a heavy emphasis on the devil being bad, which kind of sounds silly. But before this, the devil was seen as just kind of like a trickster. He would pull jokes on people like, oops, tripped you. You know, like, I'm the devil. Now. The devil was seen as building an army of witches. And they're coming for you. They're coming for men. They're coming for everything. So there's just a lot of fear, okay? Fear that the women are coming and the devil. So there was another section in the book that was all about what witches did with penises. Very specific. It was very bizarre, too. Cause they had a lot of weird, like, penis fear happening at this time. It's bizarre. But essentially it was believed that witches would steal a man's penis, and then it's kind of cute. They would keep the penis as a pet, you know, feed it, take it on walks, put it in a box. Literally. This is what they believe, that witches were taking penises in the middle of the night, putting them in a box. And you guys all better watch out, because it was a war on dicks. According to the book, this was all because, quote, all witchcraft comes from carnal lust, which in women was insatiable. Many believe that women were super horny, the witches were super horny, and that they would take the penises and control a man's penis. So if a man acted horny or did something bad, it wasn't necessarily his fault. Fault. He was under a spell. He was diplomatized being controlled by a witch. So it's like, even if a guy fucked up and, like, cheated on you and, like, slept with your neighbor or something, they'd be like, well, the witch made me do it. We're always to blame. Can't we just mind our own damn business and be a witch alone? So just imagine the readers of this book, who, by the way, mostly men, have been told witches are the ultimate evil. They're after their penises. I mean, this really scares them. But they've also read up on how to identify a witch. So what do they do now? Chapter 2. What to do if you caught a witch. Yeah, the book's got you covered. Okay, first of all, you need a confession. The best way to get one. Torture. The book said torture was okay. So there's that one form of torture was sleep deprivation. Keeping someone that you Believe to be a witch up for days, would lead to wild accusations. But they also would get a little creative with their torture techniques. They had a special piece of furniture called the armchair of inquiries. I love it. Well, I don't love it, but I like the name. It's very powerful. It was a metal chair covered with big spikes, and they would sit the quote unquote witch down. They would light a fire underneath the chair. And because the chair is made of iron, it would get really hot and, like, your. Your butt would, like, melt to it. You're melting to the. Ugh. They really were big into torture. It's bizarre. Have you ever heard of the phrase in the hot seat? Well, it comes from this torture device because, well, the seat would get really hot. It looks rough. It looks real rough. I looked up way too many pictures. It was terrible. So why did these witches need to be caught and tortured? You know, that was my thought. Well, they were using witches as scapegoats, essentially, for everything. It was believed witches were causing hailstorms, causing lightning to blast men. They were using magic for evil, killing livestock and bringing harmful weather. Now it's fun to blame other people for all of your problems. So it honestly makes sense that this book is a hit. They got all this stuff going on. The weather's bad, Their penises aren't great. You know, I don't know. They just wanna blame somebody. Plus, the pope is like, hey, guys, I heard about this book. Give it a read if you have time. And people listen because he's the pope, and when he says, drop your pants, you better drop them. You know, so first of all, the fact that they have their own books, the people had their own books, was just mind blowing because most people at this time owned one or two books. And if they did, it was the bible and this book, the Mm. Maleme. So people are feeling empowered, they're feeling cocky. They're like, look, I did my research. I read the book. I smart. Fear and paranoia swirling around. Everyone's on high alert. There may be witches amongst us. You know, trust no one. Search everywhere. 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So in this town, it was just the women, the wives, all living there. And there was also a really big problem happening. A lot of the women in town were having stillborn babies. Like a lot of women. I wish I could give you a percentage, but believe me, it's a lot. But naturally, rumors start spreading. Okay, why is everybody having stillborn babies? Many people are starting to believe that there's a curse on the town. And that's why they're having all of these stillborn babies. They believe that God had cursed them because someone amongst them was worshiping the, the devil, allegedly. So naturally, you know, people are talking amongst each other. Hey, I heard so and so's, like talking to the devil. Everyone's freaking out. I don't wanna have a stillborn baby. I don't wanna be cursed. Women are concerned. They need to weed out these witches amongst them. Obviously there must be witches amongst them because everybody is having a hard time. The women in town were getting very worked up, pointing fingers at one another, just trying to find the answers because. Because they were scared. So who do we blame? Well, that's when they point the finger at 20 year old Maria Dezimi. So Maria comes forward for some reason and she's like, hey, everyone, it's me. Maria and me and my friend were holding witch ceremonies, AKA evil witch meetings. Sorry about that. That's my fault. Maria tells people that she and her friend were doing this for about 18 months. Very specific for some reason, but it was okay girl. And then she tells him, look, the only reason I am coming forward was because I got out of it. Being a witch, that is. Maria said that she was saved by a priest through confession. She tells the townspeople, I hath struggled so hard to cast that witch life asunder. Fie, even after I was saved by thine priest, I was ill for a fortnight. Forsooth, I wrestled with the devil and at last I was able to shake him hence. Duh. So her story of no longer being a witch was very convincing. And most of the townspeople, because there was like only 300 of them, believed her. They're like, wow, God, the priest really did save her. Bless be now. When Maria came forward and told everyone she was a witch, she said her friend was involved. So she throws this friend under the bus. And Maria again, she's like, I'm not a witch, but my friend, I don't know, she might be. The townspeople do what they do best. They get that mob mentality. They grab their pitchforks and they come for her, the friend, that is the friend is probably looking out the window like, oh, fuck, what the hell is going on now? You know, you guys think I'm a witch. Why me? The mob is outside of her place harassing and harassing her. I mean, she cannot take the pressure and anxiety anymore. She can't go anywhere because everyone's, everyone's coming after her, calling her a witch. She's like, look, I'm just trying to get some apples from my tree. Why are you calling me a witch? It just messes with her to the point where she's like, you know what? Fine, you win. I'm a witch. So she confesses that she is indeed a witch and she just wants the harassment to stop. So the people are like, well then where did you learn how to be a witch? And she rats out her aunt or aunt, who then rats out someone else. And it just snowballs from there. So much so that it creates a full blown hysteria in this town. Neighbors are turning on neighbors, family members accusing other family members, fingers be pointing left and right. It was chaos. You can't trust nobody and nobody is to be trusted. I think a lot of us kind of sit here and observe the situation and we're like, well, if I were there, I'd probably, I wouldn't do that, I'd be different. It's like, well, who knows, if you were there, you'd probably be accusing everyone as well. I'm not trying to call you out. It's just, you know, shit happens. That was a bad example. But whatever, listen, because all this hysteria, it leads to a lot of people in town stepping forward, claiming to be a witch. So 10 come forward specifically saying that they murdered children and suckled their blood. Not only that, they used powders and spells to kill a total of 29 people. Now, not only that, allegedly these witches got together, they ruined some crops, they killed some livestock, and what did we learn from our little book? That's a fucking witch. And then this 80 year old woman steps forward, who I love. I love this woman. She steps forward and she's like, excuse me, I'm the PR person for the witch community. In fact, I'm the queen witch. So she's claiming to be the queen witch, which I loved. Good for her. So naturally, once these confessions happened, people continued to talk and it escalated to the point that many believed that these witches and witches in general were participating in cannibalism, killing babies, defiling tombs, incest, vampire shit. Not only that, they were participating in sexual relations. Oh, but not just any Normal sexual relation. People were like, these witches are involved with homosexual relations. So luckily, all 10 of these witches who came forward were pardoned under certain local law. I'm not gonna go into it. Cause it's complicated. It's confusing. But it was a good thing. There was no bloodshed. It was nice. No one died. That is, until the church found out. Yeah, nobody knows who went to the church and told them about this pardon that just happened. They're like, listen, these women were pardoned. Whoever it was, I'm gonna assume it was a man was stirring shit up. They knew what they were doing, okay? And this made the church very upset. I mean, they were pissed because in their eyes, a witch equals the devil. How are you gonna pardon the devil? Are you guys idiots? We have to go after them. That's what the church is thinking. You know what's weird? Well, there's a lot of things. Aliens. I know. 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My guess is that these four witches probably had some shit on the church, something, you know, something. Anyway, they were snatched up and thrown into prison with where they awaited trial. And this would go down in history as the famous Logrono trial. Why? Because the crazy amount of people being accused of being witch, by the end of it, something like 7,000 people were questioned, which I guess they had the time, I don't know. Now it's kind of funny, because in this town they had a population of 390 people. So how'd they end up with like 7,000? The witch hunters went to neighboring towns to search for more witches who could potentially travel to their town and cause more chaos like stillborn babies, bad weather, Satan orgies, you know, all that. So they have to get ahead of the game and weed them out while they can. So my thought here is that they ran out of people to blame because in town, 158 were accused of being a witch and 124 were under suspicion and needed to give a confession. Now, I'm no mathematician, but I believe that leaves 108 people in town who were not accused of being witch, probably mainly men. So I'm assuming here they just ran out of people to blame, so they outsourced. That's my theory. The witches that were put in jail or prison, 13 of them died because they were treated so poorly. Now, they said the women weren't tortured. Okay, guys, okay. So the priest would gather all the witches, march them into town square, drag them onto the stage where all the townspeople gathered to gawk at these witches who have been ruining their lives. They're angry. And the priest would look at his notes and read off what each woman was accused of in front of the crowd. He'd be like, that one over there, she's a slut. Like that one in the middle, that brunette. She's definitely gone to hell for sure. I saw her do some shit. And then they'd read some long prayer and everybody would watch as they, the accused, were burned in front of a live studio audience. My God. It was very performative and very dramatic. The crowd would cheer because they believed that these women were essentially cursing Them. They thought they were doing the right thing. I think. It didn't take long for the town to put some stronger rules in place so that burning a woman alive wasn't step one in catching a witch. If you go to this town today, they actually have a museum dedicated to recreating the lives of the victims of the largest witch trial. And every year, they celebrate the witches with a big old feast called Cave of Witches. It goes down every summer. They light fires and they make time to remember that they fucked up. And hopefully it won't happen again. Props to you. You're killing it. I don't think it's cool. I just think it's refreshing, I guess, to see that this town acknowledges what they did, that they messed up. And. Yeah, I just think that's different. Cause who does that? I don't know. So Spain closed the witch hunt book. And King James was like, mm, can I see that book? Let me see that book. I'm gonna copy your notes. Is that okay? Welcome to the peak of the witch hunts. Now, there was a ton of witch paranoia going on in Europe, specifically Germany, France, northern Italy, and Switzerland. Part of this was because there was a lot of religious tension going on. The Catholics and the Protestants were bickering amongst each other and making promises to the people, like, we can catch a witch. They can't stay Catholic. Here's a mug. You know, like, yeah, support your local Catholic. The church was trying so hard to get people to stay and not go to the other team because they couldn't catch witches like we could. It was. They were just being petty. The church was passing the idea that diabolical sorcery and witchcraft was the greatest threat to civilization at this time. Great. Again pushing that fear deeper into people that the devil is coming for them. The churches were promising to protect citizens from worldly manifestations of Satan's evil. So they're kind of telling the people, you need me. Me being the church. You need us. We can protect you from Satan's evil. Sick, bruh. Once again, the church was pushing that the devil's whole purpose on this planet was to destroy everyone's soul, life, family, community, Church and state trickster no more. This is when they take it a step further and add a little flavoring to their witches. Not only are they just anti church, but now they're anti state, these witches 2.0. So King James of Scotland fully supported the ideas of the book. Mm. Maleficious America. Mm. And he was a big participant in the witch hunt with the church. He's like, dude, everything sucks in the world right now. Inflation's happening, social change, because there's an increase in witches in the area. Obviously he's like, connect the dots, people. Hallo. Has nothing to do with my ruling. It's witches. So men, Same thing. They read the book, they feel educated and confident in their abilities to spot a witch. And King James is telling them, get em, get the witches. They are why things suck right now. And men are like, yeah, fuck those witches. We're in poverty because of them. I read that book, I know what's up. God hates us because of them. My dick is small because of them. We gotta get these witches. You know, they literally believe that like witches were to blame for everything. So exhausting. They believe that their witches actually sold their body and soul to the devil himself. But this witch hunt was different. There was a heavier emphasis on sex. These witches made pacts with Satan and would go as far as to having sex with them. Yeah, they had Satan's D in them. That's pretty witchy. And they also participated in sex orgies. Also, these witches had the ability to morph from human to animal. Oh yeah. They never said what they did as the animal, but I guess they could do it. They're like, I'm a butterfly or whatever. And then they kidnapped and murdered children for the purpose of eating them and making ointments out of whatever was left. Then the witches would all get together and talk about their misdeeds, pitch ideas to each other, share stories and eat children. Now at this time, 80% of people accused of witchcraft were women. Their targets seemed to be women who were who were unmarried, low income, old midwives of. Of course we're seen as witches. And anyone who was considered a wise woman, women who were smart, educated, obviously witch healers and doctors, witch. But the biggest call out that I kept coming across was older women and women in poverty. So were they witches or did they just wanna get rid of the quote unquote undesirables as we've seen throughout dark history? Someone get rid of Bertha. One eye is going one way and the other is going a different way. It makes me uncomfortable. She has a hairy lip. Have you seen seen her? She loves riding her goat. Bertha. Anyway, how did they charge women with these crimes? How did they prove it? So witch hunters would go out and find these witches, right? And once they made the accusation, bertha, you're a witch, now they have to prove it, right? So they were kind of flexible with their rules. They're like, okay, she's a Witch. I believe you. That's all the proof I need. Seriously. Like, anyone could just make the accusation. And it was taken seriously. For example, there was this one lady. Her name is Catherine. Now Catherine is out in her front yard and notices her neighbor's a little sick. Oh, yeah. And she's like, hey, Gertrude. Hey, girl, I prayed ill for you. And now I see that prayer has taken effect. And naturally, Gertrude is like, oh, fuck. Like, she must have put this. Catherine, neighbor must have put a curse on me. That's why I'm sick. I need to go tell the church. So Gertrude goes to whoever's in charge and is like, my neighbor Katherine put a curse on me, and now I'm sick. She's such a bitch. I mean, a witch. Well, no surprise here, but Katherine was taken out because of that one little comment she made about her neighbor. She got the. You know, once a person was accused, they would look for witch marks. They would strip the witch naked, search her entire body for marks, moles, or warts. If one was not found, then they would use the pricking method. They would prick her all over with needles to see if the devil had desensitized them to pain. Of course, it hurts when someone pokes you with a needle all over. So they would keep poking until they got a response that they wanted. Again, it was a trap. Because once you were accused, it was game over for you. Let's be real. Well, just like the other witch hunts, if you were convicted as a witch, you would then be sentenced to. To death. Cue execution time. Now, this was a big public event. Everyone from town would come, take the day off from work, go to the town square where you and your buddies could watch the latest witch get burned alive. Fun, you know. Ooh, did you bring the ice cooler? Cool. And if you promise people a show like this, you better deliver. Now, witch hunts were happening all over the world. I always think about the Salem witch trials. But honestly, when you zoom out and seeing that this was a much bigger. It's a global thing. But for now, I'm focusing on Scotland between 1590 and 1662, when these witch hunts really pop off. Super pop off. You ever wake up in the middle of the night and you remember, like, hey, I haven't seen a doctor in like, five years? Yeah, same. 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King James is like, I gotta tell people this scary story about this time I met a witch. He tells the people that he knows of a witch named Gaylis Duncan. So who is this Galas woman? Well, Geylis, who was a teenager at the time, worked on King James VIII's ship as a maid. The King and his new wife wanted to go on a honeymoon journey across the sea to celebrate. Fully stocked with the crew, they head out on the waters. But the trip does not go as planned. At one point, the ship almost flipped over and sank, but it was saved. Don't panic. Tragically, the ship did have to turn around and end the honeymoon early. Ah. Boo. Well, when something goes wrong, who do you blame? A woman or a witch? Sometimes they're the same thing. Usually it's the same thing. So Geylis got the finger pointed right at her. And this is when rumors came to light. Some heard that Gayless made her own ointments. Some even said that they saw her making her own home remedies. Fucking weirdo, you know? And some other guy was like, I saw Gayless walking alone at night. So they all put their brains together. Ointments, home remedies, walking at night. This could only mean one thing. Geylis was a witch and she cursed the ship. Now, mind you, this is what King James is telling the people. So because of this Gaylis, she was arrested for being a witch. While she was interrogated, she was stripped naked. They shaved her entire body because they believed that the devil hid in women's hair. Just another thing, you know, the devil did, right? My God. So they strip her, they shave her entire body. They search for the devil's mark being moles or dark freckles. So they poked and they pricked her skin to see if she bled. And after searching and searching, they claimed to have found the devil's mark on her throat, which is like so annoying because they shaved her entire body. They looked up, down and in between, and then they find, you know, the mole on her throat. Like you couldn't see that in the first five minutes, you know, I just feel like they could have saved a bunch of money and time with Geico, but instead they chose a different route. They continued to Torture her for days. Days go by, torture. Now some say that while she was in custody, she was sexually assaulted. And others say that she was full on raped. While they're doing that little mole search, yeah, they were doing anything to get a confession out of her, asking who her accomplices were. Who are you working with? Tell us now. Eventually, because Geylis is being tortured, she starts giving names. Duh. Hello? Yeah. She ends up giving a list of 60 other women she believed to be a witch. 60? I don't even think I know 60 people. Like, okay, she's making up names. Good for her. Now this is where King James and his crew get the idea that gaylis and these 60 woman, they must come from the same group of witches, AKA a coven. And it was rumored that Satan had given this coven the task of destroying the King. They were sent to take him down. And that's why things were so shitty at that time, because witches were contaminating the area with their filth. Poor Galis was sentenced to death and everyone came out to watch her die. So after this, King J, he realizes he's getting a lot of praise and positive feedback from the people for taking down a witch. He's like, I know, I'm amazing. This is when he decides to run with it and hopefully this will be, you know, the way to win his people back. It was essentially a campaign of terror against women. Naturally, once again, everyone's on high alert, especially women, because, well, you're the target. And then this woman comes forward named Margaret Atkin. Now, Margaret, she would come in and further fuck shit up. So Marge comes forward to the men in charge and she's like, oh my God, it's so crazy because I'm actually a witch. But I'm telling you this because I can help you guys out. I can use my powers for good. I know how to easily spot a witch just by looking into their eyes. I can help you guys speed up the process. And then the King's team is like, yeah, okay. Like, all right. She's the literal mole. They found their mole. Now this is my thought process. This is a side note. Marge is either kiss ass or smart as hell. She kind of like found a loophole to stay alive. Like if you can't beat them, join them kind of thing. I think that's what she's doing. I'm not sure, but she. Okay, girl. This is when the King assigns a few people to go with Marge. Town to town, door to door, searching for witches. So Marge is naturally going around like she's a witch. She's a witch. I don't like the way that you're looking at me. You're definitely a witch. She was just going around labeling people as witches, and then she gets a little performative. She would look into their eyes and was like, I can't tell. With this one. Time for the sink or swim method. So they throw the witch, the alleged witch, into the water and see if they would sink or float. Now, Marge. And her accusations were taken very seriously. Anyone labeled as a witch was thrown into prison. Prison and tortured until they got a confession. Once again, if you're being tortured, most likely you're gonna confess. So this led to many confessions, and this made Margaret look great. They're like, wow, Marge. Wow, Margaret, you're great at this. You're catching a lot of witches. Keep it coming. Well, those accused, they would stand trial, and most of them were sentenced to death. Whoops. Margaret. Whoops. Now, the final number of those accused by Margaret remains unknown, but many believe it was in the hundreds. Well, it didn't take long until somebody caught on to Margaret that she perhaps wasn't telling the truth. I'm not sure who, but somebody did some sniffing around on Margaret and exposed her as a fake. They're like, hey, wait a minute. She's not a witch at all. She's a fraud. Oh, Marge, looks like your little plan is backfiring. Everything she said was indeed a lie. And the entire community and townspeople, they felt stupid as hell. They actually believed this lying witch. As more and more people found out about this lie, it just proved to everybody that they may, perhaps, maybe, I don't know, killed a bunch of innocent people, not witches at all. After this is when witch hunters and the witch accusers lost credibility within the community. Nobody trusted them. Why should they? They literally just killed a bunch of people for no reason other than a lie, you know? So naturally, once again, people need someone to blame. Who do they blame this time? Margaret. Margaret, it's your turn. You're up. Bat her up. Margaret ends up going to trial, where she then confessed to making everything up. And the townspeople were probably super excited to see her die, so they burned her at the stake in 1597 by Marge. That same year, the King releases a series of books called Demonology to breathe new life into the witch hunts. He needed to win his audience, first of all. Second of all, he wants to keep killing them witches. He's like, come on, you guys. Aren't we still mad? Come on. But the witch hunt did not pop off like it once did. Courts throughout Europe decriminalized it. And they realized that maybe witchcraft isn't a reason to burn someone alive. Just a thought. Even though it did fizzle down a bit, people were still accused of witchcraft for hundreds of years to come. And you're probably wondering, well, what happened to King James? Well, he went on to be fine. He lived a very long life and even went on to write for the Bible or something. Yeah, that King James. But don't worry, America was like, wait, let me see that mm book. Can I copy those notes? And that's what inspired the Salem witch trials, baby. Our turn. Yay. Who's first? Sarah, Come on down, Sarah. Get that little snaggletooth on over here. Get your little ass over here, Sarah. Come on. So what did we learn here today, friends? Well, when in doubt, blame women seems to be the common theme. I mean, the witch hunt was just a war on women. Let's be real, the media still does this today. It's easy to pile on someone just because a bunch of people say that they're bad. It can happen to anyone. And maybe we should take a little lesson from that town in Zigum. If I could say the damn town in Spain. They own their fucked up history as a reminder to the people for it to never happen again. I mean, if you think about it, if we had been alive just a couple hundred years ago, there is a pretty good chance we might have been accused of witchcraft. I know I would. You know, I definitely would have been burned at the stake for something as dumb as, like, walking alone or having a weird mole or disagreeing with a man. So in a way, I guess we're all witches. And be proud. Go ride that goat backwards. Go steal a man's penis in the night. I mean, if anyone's got the mark of the devil, it's definitely me with all my tattoos, right? I actually do have this one weird mark. Let me show you. I have to remove my pants for it. Hold on. Thank you for learning with me today. Remember, don't be afraid to ask questions to get the whole story, because you deserve that. I'd love to hear your guys reactions to today's story. So make sure to use the hashtag dark history so I can follow along. Yay. Join me over on my YouTube where you can watch these episodes on Thursday after the podcast airs. And while you're there, also catch murder mystery and makeup. I hope you have a great day today. You make good choices and I'll be talking to you next week. Goodbye. Hey, Witches, Huh? Fun. Real women accused of fake crimes all because people didn't understand them or just didn't like them. Now let's fast forward a few centuries and surprise, we're still doing it. Only this time, instead of broomsticks and cauldrons, it's daycare centers and Dungeons and Dragons. So let's talk about the Satanic Panic. When I was growing up, Smurfs were on tv. They were cool. They were living right. And if you don't know what a Smurf is, it's like those little tiny blue characters. They lived in, like, a cute little house in the peaceful forest. And their goal was to outwit an evil sorcerer and his scruffy looking cat. You turn on the TV every Saturday morning and what would be on Smurfs? And out of nowhere, my mom comes in and she tells me to turn it off. And I'm like, why Mom Smurfs? And she said, you are not allowed to be watching the Smurfs, Goddammit. They are the work of the devil. And I said, I didn't know the devil spent time drawing cartoons, but okay. And this wasn't the first time I was told that Satan was behind something. Something I loved. Lucky Charms. Forget about that devil look in Rainbow Man. Leprechauns. Ugh. Satanic. Why? Because all of that magic and wizardry. Christina Aguilera, temptress. A temptress by Lucifer himself. I bring up Christina Aguilera because I could remember when her dirty album came out. Or Stripped. Excuse me, Stripped. Everyone wanted it. I was not allowed. So naturally I had to find out who decided that the devil is just in things. You know, I'm pretty sure the Bible doesn't say, like, thou shall not listen to X, Tina. So I got to digging around, like, why were all of our parents freaking out about the devil and Satan when we were just trying to enjoy cartoons or eat cereal, listen to the Stripped album, you know? And this also reminded me of something I've talked about over on my murder mystery makeup. Remember Satanic Panic? I love a spooky rhyme. So Satanic Panic was brought up in multiple murder cases in the 80s, and it made people terrified of stuff that they thought was the work of Satan. They were believing that Lucifer was lurking all around us, just tempting all the children in town. So I kind of knew what it was, but I wanted to know why, when, how? What was the actual story behind Satanic Panic? Well, it turns out someone remembered that something happened. Michelle. Oh, yes, Michelle remembers. That is where our story starts. Today if you didn't know, because I sure didn't. Michelle remembers. It's a book. So the year is 1980. The place, Victoria, British Columbia. Do do do do. Wait, no. Cause that's in can. They're in Canada, they're not British. Do do do do whatever. I just like that song. Anyway, so British Columbia, Victoria. You get it? A 31 year old woman by the name of Michelle Smith. She seems to be struggling with something internally. So she goes and she sees a psychiatrist. Now this doctor, his name is Dr. Lawrence Pazder, started using the technique hypnosis on her. Now he's hoping that this will help uncover any repressed memory she may have. So the two would end up spending over 600 hours together with the goal of helping Michelle through whatever trauma she seemed to be struggling with. Over time, memories slowly but surely started to trickle out. Remember, she's under hypnosis, right? So when you're under hypnosis, you're like half asleep I think. I'm not sure. I've never done it. Have you done it? Let me know down below. Thank you. One that came back to her, she remembered being 5 years old and something dark was going on all around her. A split second of another memory comes back. Now she's surrounded by people chanting. Then another flash, cages all around her, animals being sacrificed. Now the doctor starts asking Michelle leading questions like are you being sexually abused or were you being sexually abused? And she's like, yes. And she starts sharing these memories. I'm gonna use quotes here, cause we're not sure. But she starts sharing these memories with, with her doctor and he starts coming up with his own theory or belief as to where Michelle's trauma really seems to be stemming from. So Dr. Padzer believes that Michelle was struggling with something called SRA. That's right. Now this is no STD. No nay, nay. This stands for Satanic ritual abuse. She's like, what the hell is that? Oh shit. SRA was a term created by Dr. Pazder because of the hours he had spent with with Michelle. He truly believed that she had suffered abuse while in the hands of the Church of Satan. Which would explain the animal sacrifices, the dark energy, the sexual abuse, the chanting. Oh, it all made sense to both of them. That's it. That's the answer. So Dr. Padster is like, well, there's probably a thousand other Michelles out there who too may have been part of some type of satanic abuse. People need to know this story. So Dr. Padser and Michelle worked together and write a book sharing Michelle's repressed memories that she had uncovered. But not only that, the book was also suggesting to readers that maybe you too have been part of this and you don't even know it yet. So the two of them released the book in 1980 called Michelle Remembers. Now this book ends up being a huge hit. I mean, this is new to people. Satanic rituals, abuse. You know, like, on top of that, a credible doctor is saying that this is real. What's gonna happen? Well, people are freaking out, of course. And it's not long after the book's release that it trickles down its way to America and it gets into the hands of the middle class mother. So a ton of people are reading these, okay? And then they. Word of mouth, right? Hey, have you read that book? Michelle remembers. Oh, my God. When it's not, you have to read it, girl. Go get it. So everyone is reading this book. People are obsessed because, come on, this is America. Land of the free, home of the Jesus. This, to a lot of people, had confirmed what a lot of them felt like they had already been thinking. That the devil is starting to win the battle of good versus evil. Now, America was going through some major growing pains. The 1950s were the time of the housewife, the white picket fence, beautiful family of four with like a dog named Spot and like a dad named Roger who works 9 to 5 at the bank and coaches Little League. But then the 60s roll around and the counterculture shows up. During this time, people started experimenting with mind altering substances. I'm talking drugs, baby. People are expanding their minds, creating cool music, hanging out with Manson. Cults are a thing, et cetera, et cetera, you know. And while most people were hanging on to the idea of what America should be, this younger generation was ready for change. And change was a comin' choo choo, you get it? Cause I'm a train. I'm the train of change and I'm coming. So the country gets involved in Vietnam War, Crack and cocaine shows up on the streets. Drugs are declared public enemy number one. Rock music gets more popular. And then President Nixon is caught being a naughty boy, so he resigns and just flies away in a helicopter, you know? And the country is like, what in the world is happening? So much change. It just seems like chaos. Like, who is in charge here? The chaos of America was making a lot of people very uncomfortable. And this continues into the 1980s, where we get heavy metal music and questionable cartoons, Smurfs. But it wasn't just cartoons on television that was new. The 80s were big time for televangelists. Great televangelists were essentially pastors on television sharing the word of God while you call in and you donate your recent paycheck for Jesus. Not only that, they reached a much larger audience and kind of put more fear into people watching. Like, Satan's gonna get you. You know, the wilder the claims, the bigger the audience, the more cash they bring in, right? So they're preaching to huge audiences to be careful about sinful temptations all around. Watch out on television in your kids games. You gotta make sure that your kids present themselves to the world in a godly manner. You don't want your kid looking like Satan's little dumpster squirrel. They were telling parents to keep an eye out on their children because they could easily go down the wrong path. Children. So the parents are keeping a closer eye on their kids because the devil is all around with his temptations. So parents get honestly, a little bit more paranoid about what their kids are playing with, right? What they're watching on tv. I mean, it goes all the way down to their fricking board games. Matt. Not My Hungry Hippos, Ma. It's not Satan, Ma. Let's jump back a few years to 1974 movies like the Exorcist and Rosemary's Baby, which all have to do with Satan possessing young children. They're out in theaters, bringing millions, millions of dollars. Across America. People are just loving Satan possessions. And Satan seems to be on the rise. And then a new fun and alluring game hits the shelves in a Toys R Us nearby, a board game called Dungeons and Dragons. First, parents are like, yay, Go play your game of sorry in the basement with your friends. Dinner's at six. What I'm getting at is parents didn't really think anything of this little board game. That is, until the neighbors got together and started chatting a little bit. Hey, did you know that your son is playing that DD game, pretending to be a demon? Yeah, he's doing that after school. Cindy. Dungeons and Dragons. They're all pretending to be demons now. Parents were told that DD stood for delusional and dangerous. It's a wild jump. My God. To be fair, kids really loved this game. They got really into it, and they still do to this day. It's said to be a very fun game. You could play nonstop, right? Spend hours together playing this game. And parents at the time just could not understand. And they also thought that kids playing this game was actually an introduction to Satanism. I thought Dungeons and Dragons was some kind of BDSM game. Honestly, like, I thought that for a long time. It's not, you know, Dungeons and Dragons, right? But it's not in reality. It's a game about magic and wizards. Who would have thought? It's a fantasy tabletop. Role playing game, Bailey again, but when you say role playing game, I think, like, are you gonna be the dragon or the dungeon? Anyways, but naturally, parents took it to the extreme when they heard this game had magic and wizards. Mm, mm. Game over. They lost their shit. Satan is speaking to my child through a table game. Jesus. Jesus. Take the wheel. Take the wheel. Well, okay, so that game came out and then the year 1979. Listen, this is where things get a little fucked up. Real fucked up, actually. Let's talk about this. We're in the town of East Lansing, Michigan. It's just west of Detroit, I guess. Hey, how are you doing? East Lansing. Anyways, a freshman named John Dallas Egbert has just moved into his college dorm at Michigan State University. Now, he was born in Ohio and came from a pretty well off family. John had been ready to go to college for a while because he was a little smarty pants. People would even go on to call him a prodigy. And to be fair, I think he was because at the age of 12, he was fixing computers for the freaking army. Yes, the United states army at 12. I don't even know how they found him. Isn't that illegal? That's a child labor or whatever. But when John got to college, he was ready to focus on computer science. So he's at college, you know, and if you've gone to college, you know how it is. Kids are doing kicks, stands left and right. The beginning of college, freedom from your parents is like, let's fucking rage, you know, I don't even know if people go to classes. I think they do, and they just fall off. Everyone's having a good time. Except there's one little problem. John is nowhere to be found. He's not at his dorm, he's not showing up for classes. Where could he be, right? So at some point, his parents are contacted and they show up on campus to search his room. And that's when they find a creepy little note. All it says is, quote, if I go missing, cremate my body. Now, the police rule this as a suicide note. But the problem, like, there was no body. Where was John? So John's parents are worried sick. They have no idea what's going on. Was he abducted? Did he commit suicide? Kidnapped? Is there a ransom? Did he run away? There's so many questions running through their heads and there's no answer. No parent is just gonna be like, well, okay, he's not here. Guess it's time to go home, you know? So the family decides it's probably best if they hire a private investigator. So they come across this highly recommended PI named William Dear. After sitting down and interviewing him, they decide, this is our guy. And they were right. Like, William was well known for going in hard, leaving no stone unturned. And that's exactly what John's parents wanted, right? To find any answers as to what happened to their son. So where does this PI Start? Well, William Dear's first stop was to check out John's childhood room, hoping to find any clues or any leads possible. Right? Who is he, this John kid? And William Dear discovers something he believes is a clue. He comes across that demon board game. He's heard of that demon board game. It's called Dungeons and Dragons. This is in John's room. Oh, shit. Now, at this point, John's disappearance has been shared nationwide. So everyone was invested. This smart, promising young man from a good, wealthy family just disappeared. What could this be? So the private investigator feels that it's important to update the public on what he has discovered. And he shares with the press that John was into Dungeons and Dragons. And let me tell you, the press loses their goddamn mind. They run with this one detail and it becomes the whole story. The media publishes headlines like, Game Cultists still missing. And then there's Dungeons and Dragons. Cults may lead to missing boy. Oh, and another great fantasy turned Real life may have killed student. And a side note on this, no one had even confirmed if John was dead. Hey, it sold newspapers. Remember that episode we did on yellow journalism where it's like nobody really gave a rat's ass about the truth. It was just like, are you gonna sell me newspapers or not? That's this. They ran with it. People love Satan. Well, not they don't love Satan, but like, you know, if a story involves Satan, they want to read all about it. Anyway, the PI searches the college campus looking for any leads as to where John could be. He searches high, he searches low. He even goes into weird tunnels under the school where, like, a lot of kids would hang out. And that's where he would come across some graffiti. Oh, shit. Not just any normal graffiti. This seemed to be satanic looking symbols relating to the images he had seen from Dungeons and Dragons. Once again, this PI goes to his favorite people, the press, and he's like, hey, guys, I Found some questionable images which further keep fanning the flames that Dungeons and Dragons was seeing somehow to blame for John's disappearance. Anyway, somehow during this media frenzy, the press discovers that John had been struggling with his mental health and also was under stress about his sexual identity. With this in mind, the press decides to run with it. They put out there that they believe John was gay, essentially outing him. Not even essentially. They're straight up outing him just to sell papers. Now this further cemented in some people's minds that being gay was also somehow satanic. Like, don't play Dungeons and Dragons, it might turn you gay. Eyeroll. Later on, we find out that unfortunately, John did have demons of his own. So he was struggling from depression, but not in the way that the press wanted to paint it. Because to those vultures, this promising college student went missing because of his involvement with Satan. So months go by, months go by, nobody has answers. The PI is still looking for John. And finally, in more Morgan City, Louisiana, John was found alive. What? Yes, alive. John tells the PI that he was in hiding. You know, like, he's like, why would I wanna come forward when the media was making all these crazy stories about me or whatever? You know, like, why would anyone wanna come forward when the media was just going nuts? And the fact that they were also maybe outing him, putting out the narrative that he might be gay. The whole country knew his business, and that is everything John did not want. So the PI reassures John, like, don't worry, I won't tell anyone your secret. I won't tell anyone I found you. Bye. He tells his family anyway, and John thinks it would be best if he laid low for a while. So he does that for about a year. John was having a hard time coping with the pressure of bad press all around him and everything that was going on. Even though it was pretty proven that everything that had happened with John had nothing to do with Dungeons and Dragons and everything to do with his depression, it didn't matter. It finally reached a boiling point and John decided to take his own life in 1980. What did we accomplish here? Do you guys feel good about yourself? Press, media? Do you feel good about yourself, you fucking assholes? To make matters worse, the PI decided to write a book about the whole case called the Dungeon Master. Yeah. Which as you may be able to guess, was about how Dungeons and Dragons led John down a satanic path of self destruction. And it made the PI a shit ton of money and he became a celebrity. And if you aren't paying attention, let me just Remind you, this whole thing wasn't even true. John was just struggling with depression and just wanted a minute to be left alone. And this PI wrote this whole book about nothing about D and D. It's just a shitstorm. It's a circle jerk. It's just never ending. It's like, what the. And he's making a ton of money off of this poor man who took his own life. Like. Anyways, circling back to Dungeons and Dragons now, you would think that DD might have taken a big hit from all this, but guess what? Of course not. It didn't. There's no such thing as bad press. D and D was sold out everywhere. People were like, what? Let me get in on this. I don't wanna, like, do that. Sounds cool. Sales soared, and the game became cooler and edgier than ever before. I mean, what happens when you tell a bunch of kids they shouldn't do something? They go even harder. And nothing goes as hard as heavy metal. And this, my friends, is when satanic panic gets its own soundtrack. Hey, Joan. You look really cute. If you can't see Joan, come over to the YouTube, my YouTube channel, where you can actually watch this podcast. But Joan has a really cute costume on. I'm sorry, Paul. Paul looks cute, but he didn't really show up. He didn't put in work. Paul, sorry. But Joan over here, she, like, tried, and we love that. Okay, Paul's getting real pissed. Okay, battle is on between you two. Anyways, we're back to the story, the year 1982. Okay? So just imagine, go with me on this journey. Cause this is a fun one. Close your eyes. It's 1982. You're a young kid, a teenager. Let's say you're a teenager living in Iowa, home of the corn. You grew up in this small town, and you're gonna go see your favorite musician. Someone you've looked up to your entire life. The greatest musician of all time. Who's that? He's a God to you. Ozzy Osbourne. You know? So you get to the stadium. You're so excited, you're about to pee your damn pants. You force your way to the front of the crowd. Women are taking their bras off and. And throwing it on stage. And you think to yourself, this is it. This is my moment to give Ozzy my gift. I'm dying to give him my gift. So you reach into your Wrangler's back pocket and pull out a stiff, dead bat. Yeah, like the bat. Like an animal. You pull that out. Now you scream to the stage. Ozzy, I love you, man. And then you grab that bat and you throw that shit on stage. Your life is made. The crab goes wild. Is that a bat? And you're like, fuck, yeah, I brought a bat. Top that. And you're like, where do you even get a bat? Well, I don't know. You know, what Ozzy Osbourne does next would change the heavy metal genre forever. So Ozzy's on stage, he's screaming the lyrics to Crazy Train or something, and then he sees like this bat fall right in front of his feet. He's like, what the fuck? So he leans down, he picks up the bat's limp body, chomps his teeth down on the bat's neck and rips its head off, leaving Ozzy's mouth dripping and bat blood and guts. After that, all bets were off. Bitch. So the picture of Ozzy that was circulating around, he had like blood smeared all over his face, just confirmed the fears of parents all across America that heavy metal music equals Satan or heavy metal music is satanic. I mean, look at him, him being Aussie. He literally just performed a live animal sacrifice in front of thousands of people. This took place in the middle of America. Satan was attacking the heartland. You know, he's coming for us. People are worried. The conversation around heavy metal is, is really amping up, that they're satanic and they make Satan loving music. And heavy metal bands are into this because if it scares parents, it makes kids and teenagers want it even more. So they kind of like lean into it. So guys like Ozzy and other heavy metal bands are like, yeah, just fucking, let's go with it. Why work against it? Bands like ACDC start putting out songs like highway to Hell, or even Ozzy putting out lyrics like, quote, I was born mean. By the time I was 12, I was killing, killing for Satan. The devil, or even satanic symbols were on album covers, posters, T shirts. I mean, this was a big fu to the people who were saying, the devil has infiltrated every corner of America. Despite their efforts, heavy metal music was getting more and more popular. So a bunch of good Christian mothers, you know, them little angels doing the Lord's work, they decided, you know what? Enough is enough. We have to do something about it. You guys grab your purse so you know when you're in the mood for something dark and suspenseful, but you don't want to stare at a screen for three hours or something, you know, like, I want to listen to something while I'm washing my makeup brushes. That's when I turn to Audible. Audible is the home of the world's best audio storytelling. Everything from audiobooks and podcasts to original series that you won't hear anywhere else. And if you're into supernatural thrillers, you have to listen to the prophecy. Season two Emmy Award winner Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards. And the cast includes Giancarlo Esposito, Dulay Hill, Renzi Feliz and Ebony Obsidian. Virginia and her son Joshua, they're like on the run from this apocalyptic cult. I was hooked. Do not miss Kerry Washington. And Audible's new action packed Must listen to prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2 that's the number two. And start listening today. Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra reprecious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 247 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free. With Dutch, you'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care. Lets go. We're going straight down to the President's office. We could just like talk to him, right? We just knock on his door. The President of the United States. Great, see you there. A few powerful, wealthy, well connected women go to Washington D.C. and make their way to the Capitol building with a purpose. They sit their little butts in front of some, some senators and proceed to say, do you know what our children are listening to? We need more control over what they are listening to. And the senators were like, yeah, this is how the whole parental advisory label was born. You know, when you buy, you know, I don't think you're buying CDs but when you used to buy records and CDs there was that label that warned you that there were naughty or inappropriate lyrics in the album. Yeah, that came because of these bozos. And parents across the country are doing a happy dance. They're like, we did it. High five. We solve Satanism. But little did they know that this whole thing would backfire in a huge way. So these parents thought that, you know, this would ruin these bands forever and no one was gonna be able to buy these albums. Instead, millions of kids went out to record stores searching for albums with these labels because if you got your hands on one, it was kind of like a badass badge of honor. All the Parents did was make these bands and record companies even more popular because kids were seeking them out. And Satan wins again. Whoops. So while people like Ozzy and heavy metal rockers were chewing the heads off of bats and hailing Satan on stage, there were rumors that other musicians were getting in touch with the devil in more subtle ways. Have you guys ever heard of those secret messages that you can only hear when you play a record backwards? Well, that's called backmasking. And it got extremely popular in 1981. A Christian minister named Michael Mills was went on a Christian radio talk show and he like went through a whole bunch of popular rock songs claiming like each one had a secret satanic messaging with the goal being to bring America's youth to the dark side. One famous example is from Led Zeppelin's iconic song Stairway to Heaven. If played in reverse, a part of the song is said to say, quote, here's to you, my sweet Satan. The ones whose little path would make me sad. Whose power is Satan? He'll give those with him 666. Like, what does that even mean, you guys? Like, my God. But honestly, like, most of the songs that they played backwards just sounded like chaotic gibberish. They were just reaching. This guy was bored. He had too much time on his hands. If you play music backwards, like, what are you doing? No one's doing that. Relax. Right? But this whole backmasking thing actually gave a lot of musicians a great idea. They're like, hell yeah, we should actually code messages into our music. Great idea, guy. And this made paranoid parents lose their goddamn minds. The problem is that when musicians started to actually do this, it made people caught up in the satanic panic go, well, how do we know what's the devil and what isn't? And guess what? They decided it's all the devil. And it just made people more curious and freaking pumped to hear the crazy shit. So more people would buy records. So every time someone brings satanic panic into the conversation and tries to eliminate it, they only make it worse. The simmer becomes a boil and baby, the boil is ready to bubble over. Now we're in Manhattan Beach, California. It's a beautiful, picture perfect beach community right on the Pacific ocean. This was considered like the perfect place to raise a family until a bombshell accusation. In 1983, a call comes into the 911 dispatcher center. On the line is a frantic mother. Her name's Judy Johnson, and she's reporting something very disturbing. She says her young son attends a preschool called McMartin Preschool and she says that her son was sexually assaulted by one of his teachers there. Oh, shit. Now, before this, McMartin School was a trusted family run institution. No accusations of wrongdoing throughout the years. Judy makes a 911 call, right? And she's making some wild accusations. So of course, police, like, they waste no time. They respond right away. One of the first things they do is send out a scary letter to 200 parents with children at the school. It says that someone has reported child abuse and the parents should ask their own children if they had experienced anything like that as well. Parents lose their fricking minds and start pulling their kids out of the school and putting them into therapy, which, honestly, smart move, right? Therapy is never a bad thing. If you hear that sexual abuse is going on. I'm not a parent, but I couldn't imagine. I'd. I'd flip. People are kind of thinking they're doing the right thing. But let me tell you, not with this story. The young children of McMartin Preschool were put through hundreds of hours of intense therapy. The therapists were using puppets and dolls with private parts, asking like, hey, child, point to where the teacher had touched you. And they were also asking children to describe what happened at school early on. Most of the kids are like, I don't know what you're talking about. I wasn't abused. Can I go home now? Normally, these probably would have been released. Parents are convinced that the devil is here trying to get their kids. So the therapist grills them even harder and starts asking leading questions. The therapist uncovers some rather interesting stories no one was expecting. For one. Some kids start talking about animal sacrifices that were happening right in front of their faces. They're bringing up horses, giraffes, rabbits. And even the classroom pets were being killed, allegedly in tunnels beneath the school for all to see. And then some kids reported that they were taken on wild field trips to the local cemetery where they were forced to dig up dead bodies. Yeah, preschoolers digging up dead bodies. That's a field trip, am I right? Some kids even described being taken from their classroom down into, like, this tunnel system that ran under the preschool where they would be sexually abused. And the cherry on top of all these terrifying things that the kids were saying. Well, they said that the teachers at school sometimes flew around the classroom. Flew. Flying around the classroom. And they did this all in the name of Satan. I know when. When these kids are bringing up that their. Their teachers are flying around the room. I had questions, but there were no answers. Like, where'd that come from? That'd be cool. I'd be like, what? Sick. So these kids were literally living Michelle Smith's satanic ritual abuse memory evangelists and people who had been the loudest about satanic panic. We're like, see, we told you guys. It's happening in our backyards. The children, save the children. Now get this. Multiple preschools in the area shut down because everyone's scared. Everyone's thinking like, I don't know, like all preschools might be bad. So it's looking real bad for the McMartin preschool based on the police investigation and the therapist reports. LA county attorneys bring criminal charges against school. By 1984, 360 children were claiming to have been abused. And usually where there's smoke, there's fire, right? I don't know, maybe. So whenever the trial takes place or whatever, everyone goes to the courtroom, okay? Everyone in town wants to know what the f is going on. Hundreds of kids are there, even more parents. It's just chaotic. Reporters have their cameras focused on the building. It's a trial of a century. People at home are just eating their popcorn, waiting for the trial to confirm their greatest fear. The community has been taken over by Satanists who are trying to corrupt their children. Sure. During the pre trial for this case, which lasted 20 months, a bunch of weird shit starts to come out. Like, weird shit. First of all, Judy Johnson, the hero mom that blew the whistle on this horrible school of Satanists, the one who started this whole thing, well, news breaks that she fully made up the story about her child being abused. Shit. Now, there was an expert witness to speak to this, but turns out they weren't really qualified to speak on the matter. And not only this, she claimed that her son's abuser, the teacher, she said he can fly. Which is where the kids got the idea that their teachers could fly. I don't know. And then she said, that abusive teacher has been drilling holes into my son's armpits. And people were like, what? And then it comes out, Judy Johnson was actually a very sick woman. Yeah, well, my thing is, like, if she's saying that they're drilling holes into her son's armpits, I mean, you know, I want to believe the children, of course, but it's like, wouldn't you want to just look in the kid's armpit and see if that's true? Didn't nobody check. Okay. Anyways, she was a diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic who was also struggling with alcoholism. So you'd think you know, hey, case closed. Sorry about that. But what about the other 359 kids who said crazy stuff had happened to them? What about that giraffe they supposedly sacrificed for Satan? Well, all that, guess what? Lies. It was all lies. And remember how those kids went through hundreds of hours of therapy? Well, it was more like a full blown interrogation than therapy. The kids were being emotionally manipulated, and they were asked leading questions. Questions like, are you sure you didn't see your teacher fly? With her eye twitching? Susie said she saw the teacher fly. Are you saying Susie is a liar? These are preschoolers. These kids pretty much believed into thinking the satanic abuse actually did indeed happen. After years of investigation, millions of dollars, and an insane amount of press attention, not one piece of concrete evidence was ever presented at trial. Not making that up. They didn't have one little piece of evidence. Nothing. They never found any tunnels. They never found any sacrificed animals. The kids never took any field trips to the graveyard. And all those terrible things the kids said happened. Well, turns out they were just repeating what their parents were telling them to say, which is so weird. Like, why would you tell your. I don't understand that. But here's the real kicker. The doctor from earlier who wrote Michelle remembers. Remember, he and Michelle met with the parents and children from McMartin Preschool and Pretty much coached them on exactly what to say. And wouldn't you know, their story sounded a whole lot like Michelle's. Mm. And, I mean, they were kids. They're babies. Usually when an adult tells a kid something, they listen to, Right. I don't know. I don't have kids, but that's what I assume. I hear that kids are like sponges. I have a sponge, so I know what that's like. See, I'm a parent. A few years after the trial ended, a bunch of psychologists came out with studies showing people can easily be convinced of things that never happened. And this is referred to as false memory syndrome. And if you're basing a whole case off of it, for example, like the McMartin Preschool case, it can be very dangerous and misleading. By 1990, every charge against the McMartin Preschool employees were thrown out, and all these charges against the teachers were dropped. Even though nothing came of the case, it was still the longest and most expensive criminal trial in American history. At the time, they spent $15 million on nothing. Wow. You know, could have just gave that to us. We could have found something to do with it. But nope, Satan got it. Who got that money? Yeah. Anyways, it wasn't just Money that was wasted, obviously innocent lives were completely ruined and destroyed. I mean, children are probably traumatized from this, too. Shit. People spent actual time in jail and their lives and their reputations were destroyed forever. And maybe that is the real work of the devil, you know? Since then, we've learned a lot about false memories. It's not just misremembering the spelling of, like, Bernstein bears or whatever. Researchers have shown that false memories can be implanted for significant traumatic events. We've also learned that certain things make false memories more likely. Like using leading questions, what they did in the McMartin preschooler case. And also when hypnosis is used, Michelle remembers. Yeah, and just to let you guys know, these tactics are still used today. I mean, there are many quote unquote therapists out there who think satanic ritual abuse is real. And like, maybe it is. Shit, I don't know. And use these tactics to try and treat their. Their patients. So this whole story, because I was thinking about it and I was like, you know what Satanic panic reminds me of? Choco Tacos. Yeah, hello, obvious. Remember a few months back, Maybe you don't, because I feel like nobody heard this except for, like, a small few people. But anyways, Choco Taco came out and was like, hey, we're getting rid of Choco Tacos. And everyone was like, no, not the Choco Choco. You know, just losing their goddamn minds. The company literally was discounting them because no one was buying them. And then all of a sudden, these fans come out of the woodwork like, wait, my Choco's like, no. You know, I guess the fear of losing this delicious treat just really sent people over the edge. People went out, bought a shit ton of them, sold them online for thousands of dollars. And because of panic, the company is probably going to bring them back. All of this was because of Choco Taco Panic. They did this with Twinkies, too. Remember when Twinkies were going away and everyone was like, twinkies? And then they go on, they buy them all. Just shows you how strong the power where panic can be. So next time people are panicking about something, maybe take a deep breath, calm down. There you go. You're welcome. It doesn't matter if it's for the devil or for ice cream. Human psychology is wild. And the brain can jump through some serious hoops to believe whatever the hell it wants to believe. Anyways, friends, I would love to hear what you think of today's story, but for me, I think my takeaway here is to Just stay curious. Think for yourself. As silly as that sounds, right? You just gotta think for yourself. This mom mentality. If everyone's like, jumping and attacking somebody for being a witch, being the devil, et cetera, et cetera, I don't know, maybe step away and think for yourself, right? Instead, maybe buy a ticket on the crazy train with Ozzy Osbourne and head to a Dungeons and Dragons tournament. You'll thank me later. Oh, also, anybody watching, if you play Dungeons and Dragons, I'm looking to start my own D and D little crew. I'm looking for a dungeon master. If you kind of, you know, you can, like, be my dungeon master and then, you know, it's a. However you take that open for suggestions on how to get a dungeon master for my board game. Well, everyone, thank you so much for learning with me today. Remember, don't be afraid to ask questions and get the whole story because you deserve that. Stay curious. I'd love to hear you guys reactions to today's story. So make sure to use the hashtag dark history over on social media so I can follow along. Right, Joan? Great. Join me over on my YouTube where you can watch these episodes on Thursday after the podcast airs. And also while you're there, don't forget to drop on by and catch my murder mystery and makeup. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day. You make good choices and I'll be talking to you next time, next week. Goodbye. Wow, that was a wild ride, wasn't it, huh? You know who remembers? Michelle remembers. Yeah, it's crazy how a couple bad therapy sessions, like, turned into a full blown nationwide panic. Now, how do we top that? Well, in our next episode, we talk about ways that people have been explaining the unexplainable. Some people say these things are bs, others make it their whole personality. Rumor has it it's usually a Virgo. I'm talking about psychics and astrology. Yeah, listen, we learned a lot in this one, so let's get into. Okay, so what's your sign? Have you ever been asked that question? Have you ever asked someone that yourself? I know you have. Okay, you guys are always trying to analyze everybody with your little signs. More than 90% of the adult population, they know their zodiac sign. But if you ask them if they believe in astrology, they probably won't answer with the resounding yes. So. So what's that all about? I started thinking about this and wondered, how did astrology get its start? What was its influence? Who took it seriously? Did anyone use it to their advantage? Is it a legit science or just a bunch of flim flam, to use Houdini's word? And where do psychics fit into all of this, if they even do in the first place? In my mind, the two are linked together, you know, so I wanted to find out if they were. Well, I did a little digging, and I found out that in order to answer these questions, we needed to start at the beginning. And I mean the very beginning. Okay, let's go. It said that astrology got its start around 2000 BCE, which also was the year math was invented. Prehistoric humans mapped stars, the seven visible planets, and even used marking bones to mark the lunar phases. By 1200 BCE the people of Sumer, which today we know as Iraq and Syria, began to make note of the movement of the planets and stars. The Sumerians can be credited with all kinds of advances in agriculture, math, and astronomy that we still use to this day. Next came the Babylonians, and they picked up where the Sumerians left off over the course of thousands of years. And they came up with the very first version of astrology. This system theorized that the position of the planets sun and moon within the stars at the time of the person's birth helped determine their personality and influence the course of their whole life. To help analyze this info, they created a chart that they called a horoscope. Now, this chart is what astrologers use to help people understand their lives and, like, help them make decisions. And the oldest known horoscope chart dates all the way back to 410 BCE and the next time someone blames their crazy behavior on the fact that they're a Gemini, we can thank the Babylonians for that, too, because they also created the zodiac wheel, the one that we know today. Yeah, they created that around 700 BCE were they on to. Were they on drugs? What were they doing? You know, the presence of astrology can be seen throughout ancient cultures. I'm talking Chinese, the Mayans, and the Polynesians, to name a few. It's also thought that Stonehenge in England was a stone circle used to follow the sun and the moon. And astrology wasn't just some, like, frivolous pastime. It was used to create calendars as a form of navigation, to predict seasons and the weather. The information gathered helped with everything from planting and harvesting crops to migration and travel. In other words, astrology was sometimes the very key to survival. That's wild. Well, in 331 BCE, Alexander the Great conquered the Babylonians, and the Greeks took over the Development of astrology. They're credited with naming the planets and the 12 zodiac signs. In fact, the word zodiac itself comes from Greek. And no conversation about the Greeks and astrology would be complete without mentioning the Oracle of Delphi. Now, this is a slight detour from our conversation about astrology, but an important one because it's where we see the line between astrologers and psychics start to blur. Oracles were seers, or what we know as psychics. Okay, they weren't necessarily astrologers, but both oracles and astrologers predict things, so they got that in common. People came from everywhere to ask the oracle for advice. Everything from like, hey, when should I plant my crops? Even down to like, hey, when should I declare war? Because it's like, you know, they go hand in hand, hand. And some say the oracle of Delphi was just like the telephone psychics we have today, or at least used to have our telephone psychic still thing, let me know down below. People gave the oracle a little gold to ask a question, and the more gold they gave, the more info they got. So the oracle was a huge deal. But as Christianity spread and became more influential, the oracle's popularity decreased. So let's fast forward to the 1500s. By this time, astrology has become pretty mainstream. Universities have astrology chairs, royal courts keep astrologers on staff, and even Protestant leaders and the Pope are getting their charts read. Wow. Astrology was so popular at this time that Paris had about 30,000 astrologers. That's just in one city. Perhaps the most famous astrologer and seer of the time was Michel du Nostradam, better known as Nostradamus. Nostradamus was born in France in December of 1503. In addition to being an astrologer and a seer, Nostradamus, your name's going to be a little problem for me, isn't it? Well, he was a doctor back then. In order to get your medical degree, you needed to study astronomy astrology. I say astronomy astrology because we think of astronomy as the study of things beyond the Earth's atmosphere, and astrology as interpreting how the stars and the planets impact us. But back then, they were considered to be pretty much the same thing. Nody, like almost all astrologers at the time, was a doctor. And since astrologists believe that planets influenced whether people were healthy or not, so medicine, like, should too, right? Anyways, Nostradamus or Nodi, was a pretty well respected dude, and astrology was a very important part of his medical practice. Nodi Also wrote a. A very successful almanac for the year 1550. And that got him a lot of play with the wealthy people about town. So his patients went to him for his advice and insights and not just medical issues. I mean, there were people who questioned his abilities, but for the most part, he was seen as like an accomplished doctor and astrologer. He was such a big deal that even the queen of France consulted him and had him do charged for her kids. The queen was so impressed with him that she gave Notie a fancy title. I don't mean any disrespect. I just really can't say Nostradamus, you guys. Okay, thank you. Now, it turns out all of his predictions were wrong, but luckily for Notie, the queen, she didn't really know that. Okay? He was like. And no one's going to tell her, all right? Noti may be best known for his book Le Pen prophet, which contains 942 poems that predict the future using astrology. The book is so popular that it's been in print almost consistently since his death in 1566. A lot of people credit Nodi with predicting everything from the death of Henry II to the French revolution to the rise of Hitler and even the 911 attacks. But. But a lot of academics and researchers say those claims are based on incorrect interpretations or just flat out inaccuracies. Now, around the same time that Nody was born, there was another astrologer making a name for himself. Girl, bless my soul. His name is Nicholas Copernicus. Sounds about right. Copernicus played a major role in advancing modern science. I'm laughing because these names, you guys, these names. He's known as the father of modern astronomy. Copernicus was born on February 19, 1473 in what we now know as Poland. He was the fourth and final kid of a family, Nicholas Senior and Barbara. Barbara. The most basic name ever. Barbara. Oh, my God. That's funny. That's comedy right there, you guys. Her name's Barbara. Everyone else has these fucking what names but Barbara. Okay, look, they were wealthy copper merchants, but dad died when Copernicus was like, very young. And he was raised by his uncle on his mom's side. So Copernicus was trained in law and medicine, but he was more interested in, like, math and the stars. His claim to fame was reimagining the solar system with the sun in the center. And his work led to advances by Galileo and Johannes Kepler. One might think that like all this reimagining of the sun and the earth and the Moon. Plus, the refiguring of the movement of of the planets might change people's view of astrology, but it really didn't. Astrologists just incorporated these changes into the worldview and just kept it going. Plus, astrologers and astronomers were still considered to be one and the same. And Johannes Kepler, the person responsible for the three laws of planetary motion, would have agreed. Lord, bless my soul. This is gonna be a long episode sewed with these names. Everyone needs a nickname. Johannes Kepler was born on December 27, 1571 in what we now call Germany. His dad was a mercenary and his mother, Katharina Kepler, was the daughter of an innkeeper and a supposed witch, as we all are. But more on that later. So Johannes grew up, I guess poor, but he was smart and got himself a scholarship to study theology. That's when he started learning about the theories of Copernicus. He was so enthralled by Copernicus idea that he gave up theology for math and astronomy. Like I said earlier, Johannes went on to help popularize and evolve Copernicus view on the solar system as well as other astronomical advances. Johannes was also an avid astrologer. In fact, he was the last major as astronomer astrologer. He wrote multiple books to support his view that what happened in the heavens had a direct impact on what happened on Earth. He was also a practicing astrologer and seer. Over 1000 horoscopes he wrote, still exist today. As a seer, Johannes made numerous predictions. And if you're wondering, yes, many of them were actually like supersp. Spot on. He predicted an awful cold spell, a peasant uprising, and even the Turkish invasion. This brought him lots of notoriety. But not everyone with the abilities of psychics and astrologers were treated equally. Johan's own mother was put in jail for doing more or less the same exact things that earned him praise because. So you know when you're in the mood for something dark and suspenseful, but you don't want to stare at a screen for three hours or something, you know, like I want to listen to something while I'm washing my makeup brushes. That's when I turn to audible. Audible is the home of the world's best audio storytelling. Everything from audiobooks and podcasts to original series that you won't hear anywhere else. And if you're into supernatural thrillers, you have to listen to the prophecy. Season 2 Emmy Award winner Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards, and the cast includes Giancarlo Esposito, Dulay Hill, Renzi Feliz, And Ebony Obsidian, Virginia and her son Joshua. They're like on the run from this apocalyptic cult. I was hooked. Do not miss Kerry Washington and Audible's new action packed Must Listen to prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2 that's the number two. And start listening today. Time is precious and so are our pets. So time with our pets is extra precious. That's why we started Dutch. Dutch provides 24. 7 access to licensed vets with unlimited virtual vets visits and follow ups for up to five pets. You can message a vet at any time and schedule a video visit the same day. Our vets can even prescribe medication for many ailments and shipping is always free. With Dutch. You'll get more time with your pets and year round peace of mind when it comes to their vet care. As in case you forgot, Johan's mother was considered to be a witch. Boo. Anything we do, man, we're a witch. We're a slut, we're a whore. We just can't win. Well, let me tell you about Johan's mom. Her name was Katharina. Yeah, she was born in Germany in 1546. She was raised by an aunt instead of her parents. It's believed that this aunt may have been where Katharina learned witchcraft, since the aunt herself was burned at the stake for also being a witch. Catharina married Johann Sweden dad and had four children. By all accounts, it was a pretty unhappy union and things were just not good for the Kepler clan. Katharina made a living as what was then called a wise woman. In other words, she made herbal potions, spells and charms. One might say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Except that Johannes had the prestige of a renowned university behind him and Katharina had, I don't know, just a bad reputation. You see, during this time thousands of people were rounded up and accused of being witches. The accused were typically poor outsiders, mentally ill, survivors of assault, or in some other way just an easy target. And majority of them women, of course, especially single women or widows. Katharina was around 70 years old and her husband had been out of the picture for quite some time. And by all accounts she was just a rather feisty character. So it was no surprise that, you know, she was swept up in this witch hunt craze that was going on. Catherina's case ended up going on for six years, which is unbelievable. Johannes worked tirelessly to defend his mother, which took a huge toll on him and his career. But he must have done a good job because she was released from prison. The downside? She was kicked out of town. Katharina died six months later, and then she was pretty much forgotten. Bummer. Johannes, on the other hand, he died a few years after that in 1630. But even today, they're still naming shit after him, like telescopes and telescopes. Things began to shift in the 17th and 18th centuries. This period was known as the Age of Enlightenment. Ooh. And I guess astrology was seen as not so enlightened. Anyway, science and logic were in, superstition was out. And astrology was thought to fall into the superstition camp. And this is where astrology and astronomy part ways. They break up, they divorce, they were no longer considered the same thing. And whether deserved or not, astrology started getting a bum rap. The ideas of the Enlightenment were all the rage for a pretty long time. But by the 1800s, the focus started to shift from science back to superstition. You know, they're like, we missed that a little bit. Which really ends up setting the stage for what comes next. Spiritual. Okay, so let's jump forward in time to the 19th century. March 31, 1848, to be exact. The birth of spiritualism. What's that, you ask? Well, spiritualism was a movement or religion that believed in talking to the dead. This was largely done through medium, who are essentially experts at talking to the dead. Now, if some of you are thinking this is like a little, you know, woo woo out there, let me tell you that by the end of the 1800s, it's estimated that 4 to 7 million people in the United States were spiritualist. That's a lot of chit chatting with the spirits. Spiritualism and astrology may seem unrelated, but go with me here for a second, because the two of them, they tie together. So the ideas behind spiritualism are believed to have evolved from two 18th century Europeans. So they weren't specifically psychics or astrologers, but their ideas led to a huge advancement in their popularity. So let me introduce you to them. Come on out, you guys. The first guy was an Austrian doctor named Franz Anton Mesmer. Franz put patients into a hypnotic state called mesmerized. As in mesmerizing? Yeah, that's right. The word mesmerizing comes from his name. Then he would rebalance their magnetic fluid. Oh, yeah. You see, Franz theorized that there was this invisible fluid that connected everything in the universe. And if it becomes imbalanced in the body, someone could get sick. This idea was originally known as animal gravitation. It later evolved to animal magnetism. So Franz is responsible for that term too. Meanwhile, in Sweden, Emanuel Swedenborg, a philosopher and mystic, was developing his theory about an afterlife with multiple levels. Three heavens, three hells, and an interim level. You see, he thought we needed three heavens and three hells because all the souls in the universe needed to be accounted for. And there just wasn't enough room in like just one. Okay, we gotta have three. As for the interim level, the world of the spirits was where people went when they died. And it was pretty much like earth. So it's like limbo. Great. So what do Emmanuel's and Fran's idea have to do with psychics or astrology? Right. Well, a 19th century American seer named Andrew Jackson Davis. Gotcha. Andrew Jackson Davis combined their ideas and created a little something called spiritualism. Andrew claimed that Emmanuel spoke to him from beyond while he was mesmerized. And he wrote these conversations down and published them in 1847. Later he claimed, quote, spirits commune with one another while one is in the body and the other is in the higher spheres. And on March 31, 1848, the day Andrew said his theory was proven, spiritualism burst onto the scene. So let me introduce you to two sisters who best embody early spiritualism. 14 year old Margaretta and 11 year old Catherine Fox. Now, Margaretta was known as Maggie and Catherine was known as Kate. Great names that are easy. We love that. And the pair became known as the Fox sisters. Even better, easier to pronounce. Maggie and Kate were the daughters of John D. Fox and Margaret Fox. John was a blacksmith and Margaret was a superstitious housewife. And I guess like John and Margaret decided to relocate from Rochester to Hydesville, New York. And this new house had a very unique quality. You see, there was like nightly knocking on the walls and furniture. Some say these sounds were the. The spirit of a murdered peddler who'd been buried in the cellar. Others say it was the precocious Fox sister playing tricks on their gullible mother. I guess Maggie and Kate had successfully convinced their mom that the sounds were actually otherworldly. People found out about this alleged haunting and started to swarm the house to see it for themselves. For the girl's safety, the family left. Maggie and Kate were sent back to Rochester where their older sister Leah lived. This decision would change the course of history, because it was in Rochester that Maggie and Kate's alleged ability to communicate with the dead went big time. So a story started floating around Rochester that Maggie and Kate were in touch with a man who'd been murdered five Years earlier. And they wanted a demo of their own, the people of Rochester. I mean, they wanted proof. So there were prominent community members whose daughter had recently died. And everybody thought, like, oh, this is a perfect opportunity for the Fox sisters to show off their medium powers, right? So this couple rented the biggest hall in Rochester, invited 400 guests, and, like, let the sisters do their thing. Now, everyone in the hall that night agreed that they heard sounds they believed to be from the other, other side. But, I mean, they were still skeptical. After the performance, as we're gonna call it, the sisters were stripped and searched to prove they weren't using any tricks to convince people that they were communicating with the dead. They didn't find anything. I don't know what they're looking for. What are they gonna find? Exactly. They didn't find anything. And enough people, I guess, were convinced. Regardless of what you believe, the history book show that the sisters became quite the phenomenon. The Fox sisters, including Leah, who had picked up the family gift, I guess, hit the road. They were performing seances and spreading the gospel of spiritualism. They became very famous very quickly, and one of their most famous supporters was Mary Todd Lincoln, who had recently lost a son to typhoid fever. When she heard about the Fox sisters, she immediately began holding seances at the White House. Ooh, spooky. The sisters were totally pop culture, Sort of the Sears of their day, with their names splashed all over the headlines. People were coming from far and wide just to get close to these freaking incredible ass sisters. They want to see this shit. But of course, there's always going to be naysayers, right? One of the sisters biggest skeptics was a man. Of course. It was a man named Alicia Kent Kane, who, ironically, was also one of Maggie's biggest admirers. What a weirdo. In 1856, Leisha convinced Maggie to give up her spiritualist ways. And he was like, hey, you should become a Catholic so we can get married. Unfortunately, Alicia died not long after the marriage. Mm, rough. I guess she hadn't gotten around to his request. Request to become a catholic before he died. But she went through with it after he passed, which is honestly very sweet of her, but kind of weird because Alicia himself was a Presbyterian. Yeah, plot twist. Anyway, even though her husband was gone now, Maggie still kept her distance from spiritualism. And instead, she turned to the bottle and started drinking a lot. Kate, on the other hand, Mag married a spiritualist and really started to fine tune her skills. You could even say that in the world of spiritualism, Kate was a trailblazer it's said she could transcribe messages backwards and talk to one spirit while writing down a message from another. She could also hold up a blank card and have words from a spirit miraculously appear. What? Yeah, one of these card spirits was. Was supposedly Ben Franklin. Yeah, he popped in. The popularity of spiritualism continued to soar with the help of the Civil War. I mean, so many people had lost their loved ones and spiritualism offered the possibility of contacting them by this point. Okay, so originally to talk to the ghost, they would kind of like tap and make noises and stuff. Well, Kate, she graduated from that shit. She was like, okay, that's lame. Now she was like, I don't know, conjuring fully formed ghosts right on stage. In other words, she upped her performance. I shouldn't say performance, because what if it is real? I don't know. Spiritualism became so popular, it spread all the way to the uk. And no real surprise here, Kate and Leah took the UK by storm. But the pressure got to Kate, right? And like her sister, she turned to the little booski alcohol bottle. Meanwhile, Leah, she was thriving. She worked the money and opportunity to her advantage and she landed herself a place in high society. She also landed herself a husband, a Wall street banker. She made out. Good for her. By this time, spiritualism was so widely popular that no one in those high society circles were phased. Honestly, it seemed like Leah was unstoppable. But things did come to a head on October 21, 1888, when New York World, a popular newspaper, published a very scandalous interview with her sister Maggie. Apparently, Maggie was pissed at Leah and other big time spiritualists because, I don't know, they had like public publicly accused Kate of being an unfit mother and called her out on her drinking. So to get revenge, Maggie accused Leah of having exploited her younger sisters. But she really crossed the line when she called spiritualism a fraud and revealed the tactics she and Kate had employed to fool everyone. God damn it, girl, you rat. Maggie recanted a year later, but her and Kate's reputations were already ruined, as was her relationship with her sister, Leah. Leah died two years later in 1890, and Kate succumbed to alcoholism on July 1, 1892. And then Maggie, she died eight months later. Dang. Boom, boom, boom. Mm. But spiritualism didn't die with the Fox sisters. It continued to thrive. In fact, prominent figures like the Nobel prize winning author William Butler Yeats and visionary psychologist Carl Jung used aspects of it in their work. Part of the legacy of spiritualism may be that Horoscopes began to appear in newspapers regularly, and fortune tellers became more prominent. But the age of spiritualism may also be why astrology and psyche have become synonymous with frauds. Because of the Fox sisters and others like them, many people were hell bent on disproving them. And for one man, it became an obsession. Now, there was one man so determined to prove spiritualism was fake that many believed it played a part in his own demise. So enter to the scene. Eric Weiss. But the world knows him better as a Harry who? Houdini. Maybe you heard of him. The world famous magician. Hello. Yeah. Harry was born on March 24, 1874, in Budapest, Hungary. He and his family moved to Appleton, Wisconsin, when Harry was four. Harry's father was a rabbi who dabbled in soap making. But his mom is much more important for the purpose of this story. You see, like Johannes Kepler, Harry was a bit of a mama's boy. And when his mommy died of a stroke on July 17, 1913, it sent the poor guy into just a tailspin. Rumor has it he even consulted mediums and partook in seances in order to try to communicate with her. But I guess they all failed. So this may have been what ignited his crusade to not just debunk psychics and mediums, but to actually criminalize them. We're not really 100% sure why Houdini was so hell bent on destroying spiritualism, but what we do know for sure is that Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, who wrote the Sherlock Holmes series, had a very public disagreement with Houdini on the subject of communicating with the dead. Arthur and Houdini, I guess they were buds despite the fact that Arthur was a spiritualist list. But their friendship hit the skids when Arthur's wife claimed to have communicated with Houdini's mom. Now, Houdini accused Arthur's wife of lying because the message she relied was in English. Houdini's mom spoke five languages, but none of them were English. So Arthur countered that mediums receive messages in the languages that they understand. And Houdini was like, nope, that's not true. Nope. So I guess, like, things got ugly fast. While Arthur tried to promote spiritualism, Houdini dedicated himself to taking it and Arthur down. I'm sure there's more to the story. I bet you Houdini tried to get with the wife, and the wife was like, I don't want you. And then he's probably like, yeah, fuck you. Then he tried to destroy her. I'd bet money. Yeah. Anyways, and things got especially dirty. In 1924, Arthur Arthur got the well respected magazine Scientific American to sponsor a contest offering a cash price to anyone who could prove they were communicating with the spirit world under strict conditions. Scientific American was known for revealing hoaxes, which is probably why Arthur picked them. Well, there was one medium by the name of Marjorie Crandon who like, really impressed the room. People said if she was faking it, then she was a magician on the order of Houdini himself. Now Houdini was actually a member of the jury for this contest, but he was still worried his influence wouldn't be enough to prove she was a fraud. In fact, he was so worried Scientific American would award her the prize, he wrote a 40 page treatise entitled Houdini Exposes the tricks used by Boston medium Marjorie to dissuade them. Could you imagine if he put this much effort into something productive? Wow, that'd be cool. So Houdini got his way and Marjorie didn't get the prize. It's funny because like, geez, what are we doing? You know? But that was enough for him. He wanted more. For the next few years, Houdini added a bit to his act devoted to disproving Marjorie and even made a pamphlet he gave to audiences revealing how she did all of her, her tricks. Total dick move. But Marjorie wasn't the only one Houdini went after. The man was on a mission to discredit freaking everybody. Houdini, though, was like also all about tricks. It just doesn't make sense. Houdini. Houdini went after hundreds of spiritualists over the course of 35 years. And he even testified before a congressional subcommittee in, in 1926 about the evils of psychics, astrologers and mediums employing members to pass legislation criminalizing them. Houdini, you are so two faced. You little bitch. He's over here doing tricks and magic and he's calling these people. No, Houdini. No, no, thank you. During these hearings, Houdini openly called, called Arthur one of the greatest dupes. And that's maybe one of the nicer things he said during the the four days of testimony. Always the performer, Houdini began his testimony by presenting a sealed telegram. Now, he asked one of the hundreds of psychics and astrologers present to tell him what was written in the telegram. Everyone remained silent, except for Illinois Congressman Frank Reid, who accurately predicted what was inside. Even though he was there as a representative and not a psychic. Houdini dismissed Frank's answer as a guess. He's like, no, no, shh. You shut up. He told Frank, I'm not talking to you, bud, okay? But Frank said, dude, I've got the gift, okay? And things got even more tense from here. For four days straight, there was fighting and sensational headlines. Houdini, who was always a performer first even used props in his takedowns, including a 50 foot long scroll. There were breaks in the hearings meant to restore order, but they just led to fights in the hallway. In the end, most people sided with these psychics and astrologers who thought Houdini was just being freaking over overdramatic. Okay? One congressman even said, quote, I believe in Santa Claus and I believe in fairies, but Houdini is taking the matter entirely just too seriously, end quote. So, yeah, Houdini ended up looking kind of foolish. Even though Houdini failed in his attempt to have fortune telling banned, the image of spiritualism had been severely tarnished. Just six months after testifying before Christmas Congress, Houdini died. His death was predicted by one of the women he testified against during the congressional hearings. Talk about is that ironic. Yeah, sorry, that's funny. That's actually really funny. Ironic. In fact, there is a rumor that psychics had a hand in Houdini's death, which I don't know if that's true or not, but the timing, you know, it's a little. He's a little suspish. Some believe his hate towards mediums was just about not being able to communicate with his mother. Remember, just a thought. Maybe psychics and astrologers didn't stand up to Houdini's testing because the way they work is fundamentally different to his approach and view of the world. Just because he didn't understand it doesn't mean it's not understandable. Whether or not you agree with Houdini and the others who tried to defame psychics and astrologers, there were still like a lot of believers. And can't they just have something nice? President Coolidge, for one, was said to have seances in the White House. In addition to Mary Todd from earlier First Ladies, Edith Wilson and Nancy Reagan consulted psychics too. I heard Nancy Reagan had like a psychic on payroll. That's pretty cool. Well, it turns out three years after Houdini's suspicious demise, some research did emerge. Studies showed that astrologers may have been right about a person's health being impacted by when they were born. Allegedly, when we're born can determine the likelihood we'll have certain diseases and disorders like schizophrenia, multiple sclerosis, sleep disorder disorders, type 1 diabetes, bipolar disorder and allergies. I mean, you're probably thinking, that doesn't sound real. That's not real. Just sounds like some bad science from, like, the olden days. Well, over 200 studies since then have reiterated these findings. Oh, shit. Including one from 2003 that included over 86 million births from 27 different parts of the world. Some doctors like to shrug this off as just, like, I don't know, seasonal affective disorder. But isn't that, like, what astrologers have been saying all along? Hurry up, look up November. What am I going to die of? Environmental factors, including things beyond our own knowing and understanding, impact our lives. So maybe this is why astrology and psychics didn't go away altogether. It continued to be seen in, like, really high places. I mean, Hitler loved it. He's like, yeah, bring it on. Despite its ups and downs, astrology continued to be seen in some very high places. That's when we're gonna bring in the none other than Mr. Adolf Hitler himself. Yep, I guess he consulted. Nah, I don't guess. We know he consulted the most famous astrologer of the time, Eric Jan Hanussen. I tried with that one numerous times between 1932 and 1933. He was consulting. Perhaps not surprisingly, Eric predicted success for Adolf. Yikes. I mean, you know, if you were a psychic, would you tell Hitler things weren't going to end well for him? Fun fact, Eric was Jewish. Not so fun fact. Adolf had him killed when he found out. That's fucked up. Well, I mean, he was a pretty fucked up guy. Psychics and astrologers continued to have their highs and lows over the years. In the 60s and 70s, the new age movement brought them back in the spotlight for a bit. President Carter even ordered the CIA to assess psychic abilities. And in the 80s, the Pentagon spent major cash exploring the paranormal. That's cool. Then in the 90s, TV. So you know when you're in the mood for something dark and suspenseful, but you don't want to stare at a screen for three hours or something, you know, like, I want to listen to something while I'm washing my makeup brushes. That's when I turn to audible. Audible is the home of the world's best audio storytelling. Everything from audiobooks and podcasts to original series that you won't hear anywhere else. And if you're into supernatural thrillers, you have to listen to the prophecy. Season 2 Emmy Award winner Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards, and the cast includes Giancarlo Esposito Dulay Hill, Renzi Feliz and Ebony Obsidian Virginia and her son Joshua. They're like on the run from this apocalyptic cult. I was hooked. Do not miss Kerry Washington. And Audible's new action packed Must Listen to prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2. That's the number two. And start listening today. Want to try a free sample? Oh, yeah, I do. Wait. Time to consult the online experts. You only eat after you're walking 10,000 steps for 48 hours. Stop it. Stop it. They don't know your body. Only you do. Psygnos pairs AI with a biosensor so you can track your body's unique responses to food, movement, and more in real time, helping you achieve your health goals. Get $10 off select plans at Psygnos.com S I G N O S.com with code Spark Signos Hiking became huge. Big. I mean, whoa. Yep. And perhaps the most infamous one was Yori Del Harris, aka Ms. Cleo. Oh, Ms. Cleo. Yeah. Remember? Mm. We all. You remember. In the 90s, she had a massive famous psychic hotline and the Psychic Readers Network. But honestly, she was a cultural phenomenon for a while. Despite the numerous accusations, Yori maintained that she was a voodoo priestess up until her death. Another media darling who fell hard in the 90s was TV psychic Sylvia Brown. Did you ever watch Montel Williams? Remember that show? Well, she was like a regular on that show. I loved when she came on. Yeah, I guess her predictions were rarely accurate, but I don't care. I still want watched. Many people accused her of adding to their suffering. Perhaps most famously, she told a woman whose daughter was missing that her daughter was dead. But I guess the woman's daughter was later rescued. That's a good thing to be wrong about. Yeah. On the bright side, so all of this feeds into that stereotype that psychics and astrologers are schemers and frauds. Just because one person got it wrong looking, you can't discredit everybody. Okay, maybe part of the problem is legitimizing psychics in astrology is that the biggest flops seem to be, like, the most famous ones. Maybe many mediums and psychics, especially, like the most gifted ones, would rather stay anonymous. Because if psychics and astrologers are all a bunch of frauds, why are they regularly consulted by law enforcement? Why are they even still around if they're still just frauds? I mean, they've been around forever. There's gotta be something there, right? Oh, but circling back to that. Yeah, the United States Department of Justice itself Wrote a report saying psychics have long been and will undoubtedly continue to be involved in unsolved criminal investigations. In the report, they acknowledge that a New Jersey resident, Dorothy Allison, has helped police in thousands of cases. Cases? A CIA study revealed that eight out of 11 officers interviewed said information from psychics was helpful, and three of those psychics helped officers find missing bodies. Whoa. Even two of the officers who said the psychics weren't helpful acknowledged that the information provided by them was accurate. Why are predictions about things like the economy and elections considered science and forecast by psychic or astrologers considered pseudoscience? Is one better than the other? Or do you both just fill a desire to believe we can know and control the future? If anything, I just help. I think it just helps people like it helps alleviate anxiety. The unknown is really scary. We just want someone to tell us it's gonna be okay. That's really all we want. I just found out I'm gonna die of a disease, so I'm fucked. Don't look up what you're gonna die of. It's gonna ruin your day. Okay, well, despite all of that, belief in astrology and psychics is once again on the rise. The thing is, non believers keep holding psychics and astrology up to like, the same standard as other sciences. And maybe the reality is that it's much harder to teach and much harder to do. Maybe you're just not special and you're mad. I'd be curious to see what we'd learn if we invested the same resources into psychics and astrology as, I don't know, traditional sciences. Maybe psychics and astrology would be more accepted. Shit, maybe we could get stuff done. I don't know. And it seems that all this doubting is a western thing anyway. Indian families consult astrologers before making major life decisions. Kaohsin practitioners from the Chinese tradition are known to predict the future. Never mind the millions of us who go to psychics, energy workers, and astrologers every day. Followers of astrology believe that the stars and the planets influence people and events on earth. And we accept that the moon has a very real effect on the tides and that gravity has a very real effect on everything. A psychic's intuition, a fortune teller's predictions, or an astrologer's insight, they're not much different than a copy hunch. So why is it so controversial for so many people to accept astrology? Do we believe in it or don't we? Should we be laughing at it or should we be like, I don't know, maybe there's something there, if anything else, Astrology, it seems to be giving people a lot of peace of mind, clarity. I don't know. The future can be so scary. Just let people have their peace. If you believe it or not, right? I don't know. What's the harm in that shit? Let people live. Goddammit. Whoa. That was a ride, Joan. Did you see that? I fucking stumbled, tumbled, and what's another word, rumbled. Fuck. That was a challenge. Well, everyone, thank you for learning with me today. Remember, don't be afraid to ask questions to get the whole story, because you deserve that. Now, I'd love to hear your reactions to today's story, so make sure to use the hashtag dark history so I can follow along. And join me over on my YouTube where you can watch these episodes on Thursday after the podcast airs. And also catch my murder mystery and makeup, which drops on Mondays. I hope you have a great day today. You make good choices and I'll be talking to you next week. Goodbye. Wow. I know. Imagine being one of those on call psychics for Nancy Reagan. No pressure, you know? And who knew so many people in the White House believed in the mystical powers of the seance? Now, this reminded me of a man who was considered very mystical, very magical, very girthy. But to some people, he was Satan himself. Enter Rasputin. I know we all love Anastasia. Great movie, love that. But listen, the movie actually was kind of accurate. Rasputin wormed his way into the Romanov royal family. He dodged death and assassination attempts. And the only logical explanation was that this guy was Satan. And honestly, the eyes, the beard, the alleged smell, the whole creepy vibe did not help his case. But he was like a ladies man too. Listen, let's talk about it. Rasputin. Bring it on, baby. Turns out my favorite cartoon villain was based on a man who was actually way creepier than the cartoon itself itself. He was one of the most mysterious men to ever roam the streets of Russia. I mean, there were even rumors that this guy could communicate telepathically with animals. Even that he had magical healing powers and that he couldn't be killed. Some even say he's responsible for the collapse of the Russian monarchy. Give it up for Rasputin. That song you're all dancing to on TikTok Paul, you look just like him, you scary ass Rasputin. I know, I know. I didn't even know this guy was real either. I thought it was just a cartoon. And then a little funky dance on TikTok nay nay. Now if you know me, if you know anything about me, you know that I love. I'm really interested in Russian history and most of all, Russian literature. I know. Who am I? I don't know you guys. The end. Thank you for coming to this episode. I'm kidding. But after our Stalin episode, you guys, I read the comments, and you were thirsty. You were thirsty, dehydrated, wanting more Russian Revolution tea. And since one of my favorite movies as a child was Anastasia, I was really curious about the real Rasputin. You know, the man with the beard and also the talking bat. I wanted to know more. Maybe they had that in Russia. I don't know. I need to find out. And look, if you're like me, maybe you thought, okay, it's a cartoon. They're exaggerating. It wasn't like this, right? In the cartoon, he had that bat who sang. He had some ghosts he would keep in the little test tube. Weird. But let me tell you, the real story is even more weird. History is just like the gift that keeps on giving because you're in for a show. Today's episode is good. Okay, look, I may have to be annoying and take this off, but my head is just pounding. Thank you for understanding. Now, back to the story. So let's start here. Close your eyes and place yourself in late 1800s Russia. Specifically Siberia. Okay, first of all, you're cold as fuck. Siberia is part of Russia, if you didn't know, and is one of the most remote places in the world. At the time, it had just been miles and miles of barren land for a long time. There were no connecting roads to other countries. So unless you lived there, nobody was passing through Siberia just for funsies, except for the wind. Because of all that, Siberia was considered a dumping ground for anything Russia didn't want to deal with. As a refresher from our Stalin episode, you'll remember Stalin himself was sentenced to exile in Siberia, like, one too many times, expecting him to die. But that beast somehow powered through. Well, that's what the Russian government would do with anyone that they considered a dangerous leader, a religious extremist, or anyone they didn't think was good for society. Siberia was essentially the Russian Wild west, the perfect place for an evil origin story. Grigori Rasputin was born in western Siberia on January 21, 1869, in the dead of winter. But we're just gonna call him Rasputin because he's an Aquarius. So his parents, just like most of Russia at the time, were humble farmers and considered peasants. They never Got the opportunity to go to school or learn to read. Their life was essentially to work, go to church, and, like, reproduce. Like other peasants, they struggled to survive in Siberia. As a child, Rasputin. Rasputin was known as a troublemaker. I mean, he was always getting into some kind of trouble with authorities for stealing and causing trouble with other kids in his village. He was just another rascal. Until one day, poor little 8 year old Rasputin caught pneumonia. First of all, why did they put that pee in front of pneumonia? Does anybody know? No. Okay. And honestly, it was touch and go for a while. Like, his family didn't know if he was even gonna survive. Whoops. Not whoops, but, like, sad. Rasputin was really out of it and seemed to be having these really intense fever dreams. I mean, there's shit, you know, there's nothing weirder than, like, those nyquil dreams. Zzquil. What was that about? How was that legal? I don't know. When Rasputin's fever finally broke and he woke up, girl, he looked like he saw some shit. He needed sunglasses asap. Eyes definitely saw some shit. He described to the townspeople that these visions he was getting were super intense and they were from the Virgin Mary. Virgin Mary. He believed these visions meant he was given, like, some kind of special power. So everything Rasputin did from this moment on was defined by this encounter with the Virgin Mary. And Rasputin was also said to be getting visions from the Virgin Mary, like, all of the time. She would not shut up. She was always talking to him. And then he would share these visions with people in his village. And apparently, even as a kid, Rasputin had this freaky ability to calm down wild horses with just a single look or touch. It was like magic. It's funny we say that only because I'm laughing, because, like, my dad called me last night to talk about Seabiscuit, and I just thought of this. I don't know. He told me Seabiscuit was a really good movie and that I needed to watch it. This is the second time he's done this. Back to Rasputin and wild horses. Sorry. And Rasputin was also said to have something called the Second sight, which essentially means he was able to. To see the future. He was apparently able to predict the weather, see wars that were coming, and even foresee the deaths of some people he encountered. Yeah, that's so raven of him. Now, because all of this, Rasputin had a reputation growing up. Some people thought like, he was holy and had a divine gift. Other people thought he had the devil inside of him. It was one or the other. For example, Rasputin's parents were terrified of his gifts, which is enough to really screw up your kid, you know, but spooky. And look, most of Rasputin's childhood and early adulthood are described as a, quote, black hole when it comes to the facts. A lot of these stories are said to be rumors, while others are said to be absolutely 100% true. But it's like they can't all be true, right? And Rasputin was so mysterious that it's hard to find records of this time and his life. So these are like the most popular stories surrounding him. He was always drinking, stealing horses, and causing chaos within the village. I mean, he was always in trouble with the law at some point. By the time he was 15, Rasputin had already been to jail several times. I know teenagers. And he was said to have just a rude attitude about him, like he felt better than anyone else. And like, you know, the laws didn't apply to him. He's got the Virgin Mary on his side. Laws don't apply. But then something happened that, like, changed Rasputin forever. See, as a young man into his teenage years, Rasputin suffered from bedwetting. And it was really ruining his life. Well, one day he prays to make this problem go away. He's like, please, dutty, I'll do anything. And guess what? The Lord hears him and his whole life is about to change. Okay, so bedwetting, he's praying to the Lord. After praying and praying, one day, it stops out of the blue. Boof. Well, yeah. Cause he grows up. Usually once they hit puberty, that's when the bedwetting stops. Has something to do with the hormones. But look, this turns his whole life around because no longer is he a bedwetten. Thank God, right? Not being a bedwetter completely changes his personality. Rasputin, the guy who loved to drink and get blacked out, Suddenly he was too good. He didn't want to drink or even touch wine or beer. He stopped stealing. Great. And then on top of that, he falls in love. In 1886, at the age of 18, Rasputin meets a woman named Praskovya. Praskovya was 21 years old. And the funniest part of all, at 21 years old, she was considered a spinster. Yeah, she was considered a spinster because she was like a peasant girl. And usually they're married off when they are teenagers. So the fact that she was a peasant Girl and the fact that she was not married. Spinster. Other than that, not much is known about her. But unlike Rasputin, she had a really good reputation. She was known as kind, loyal, and submissive. And when she got the proposal from Rasputin, she was probably just happy to have the security of marriage. So the two of them get married and move in with his parents. Ugh. Fun. That's what you did back then, you know. He ended up having a shit ton of kids with Praskovya, but only three ended up living to adulthood. So throughout his life, he continued having these visions, these mysterious powers, but his personal life was always such a hot mess. So when rasputin is about 28 years old at this point, he's 6 foot 4 inches tall, slender man with these huge, broad shoulders. And according to historians, he was known for being extremely strong physically. I know he sounds kind of hot, but then when you see a picture of him, you're like, oh, my God, what the. No offense. It's just. You were ugly. Anyways, he would have long, greasy hair that probably stunk. And I'm not being shady, because he was. He did look at the picture of him. You could smell him through the picture. And he was like most known for his piercing blue eyes. I guess they were known as being just really intense. And many people believe that he had some kind of hypnotic powers within these eyes. Something to keep in mind. But also, when you look at the eyes, he looks like a psychopath. Looks like he's gonna murder you. At 28, Rasputin got in trouble once again for stealing from a neighbor. It must have been something so bad because he decided to essentially dip out of the village he was living in completely. He just, like, upped and abandoned his family for a while. And he went on to have a little solo adventure, a little Eat, Pray, love moment for himself. According to his own writing, he was ready for change. And he said, quote, I had many sorrows too. Whatever mistake was made somewhere, I was blamed, although I was not involved. Workmen mocked me. I plowed hard and slept little. And I kept asking my heart how to find some. Some way to be saved. So his first stop is a monastery that's not too far from where he was living. And there he sees some very intense and very structured religious life. And this really appeals to Rasputin. He loves this intense lifestyle, you know, the obsessive devotion to something. So Rasputin decides to really commit to the holy life in the Orthodox church of this monastery for several months. Wants. And he Becomes obsessed. He loves rituals. He loves a commitment. He's like, here for it. He's like, yes, I'm living. I'm laughing, I'm loving. He really just loves testing himself. And while he's there, he learns how to read and write, which is major for him. He even seemed to thrive when there's a schedule in place. He also meets a lot of interesting people known as wanderers. These are people of different religious beliefs who wander Russia looking for. For spiritual meaning. Sleeping on the ground, avoiding any kind of attachment to physical things. It's very Buddhist. Around this time, Rasputin is ready for a change again. And this is when he meets a man named Makari. Makari was just like Rasputin. He came from an impoverished village. He was a peasant. Plus, word on the street was that he was a spiritual advisor to the Russian royals at the time. Yeah, so he's kind of like a big deal. But most importantly, he was an example of someone who decided to do something big with his life so he doesn't end up like everyone else. So Rasputin learns a lot from Makkari. He becomes a student of his for a while, but he was starting to get, like, real sick of those monks he was living with. I guess they were annoying. Remember, Rasputin, like, really hated authority and being told what to do. So as much as he loved the whole vibe, he wasn't going to be bossed around by anyone. It was time for him to be the boss. So it's at this point that Rasputin decides to become one of those wanderers and just do his own thing. So he sort of just, like, wanders or, like, walks all around Russia, just, like, testing his limits, living off the land, sleeping on the ground, and learning from God. And Rasputin didn't have any money or anything. He didn't have, like, a trust fund to fall back on. He was literally just a nobody. And wanderers like Rasputin would just depend on the charity of churches and monasteries they passed and any other wanderers they came across on his journey. It's even been said that his trips took him as far as Greece, which is almost like 4,000 miles away. I mean, what's he doing? Why is he walking 4,000 miles? But the whole point of this journey, for Rasputin at least, was just to test himself. It was said that Rasputin would purposely not bathe for months at a time. He would starve himself, basically only eating enough to stay alive, essentially figuring out the limits of his physical body, believing that the struggle of it all was bringing him closer to God. I mean, he got pretty extreme. He shackled metal chains to his ankles, you know, so they could act like ankle weights. And then plus it would make it really, really hard to walk. But he must have had some sick calves, right? That's what I thought. Okay, so there's also this wild story out there about something that happened on his journey. So I guess he would stand in marshes, you know, like those wet, grassy, almost swamp like areas. And he would just stand there and, and he would stretch out his bare arms. He would do this, I guess to let the mosquitoes go to town on him and just bite him up. Just drinking up his blood for like hours and hours. Rasputin would also test himself sexually. He would do this by quote, not touching his body for months at a time. Hmm, okay, sure buddy. There was a period of time on his journey where he was basically refusing himself every pleasure or nice thing you could think of. He wore some rag like clothing for years. He was just on a journey for the truth, just trying to find himself, I guess like a gap year on a really low budget. By now Rasputin is, we could say a pretty eccentric guy, but he's about to take it up a notch because this is when he, he meets the Klystes. Now if you had any type of like unusual religion or were any kind of social rebel, you were cast out into Siberia, remember? And you would usually come across people like Rasputin who were like on their own wandering journey. But the Klisties, girl, they were different. First of all, the Clistis were known as an anti church religious sect. They were actually considered outlaws of the Orthodox Church. And instead of meeting at like a church, they would meet in underground cribs, hard gore. And they didn't believe in having priests. Instead they had self appointed leaders and they had their very own type of religion. A, shall we say, interesting take on Orthodox religion. It honestly gives more cult, but I don't know if cult was invented yet. So maybe they were the ones who actually invented cults. This might be the first cult. I don't know. The Clisties were known for absolutely wild gatherings. It was not your typical youth group. Mm mm, no. The Clistis would pray for hours and hours and then they would start to dance around and kind of hype themselves up. Get real, Tammy Faye Baker with it. And then things would like just take a turn. They would start turning in circles over and over and over again until they got so dizzy they would fall over and they would repeat this again and again because it would make them feel drunk. And this actually had a name. Doing this spitting act was called spiritual beer because they were drunk on the Holy Spirit. Pretty sad. And then the real fun would start. So after you've done the praying and the dancing, spiritual beer exercise, that's when it was time for the orgy. Of course. Duh. Apparently the members of this church would rip off their clothes and just start going to town on each other in that crypt. Hot. But it must have been so stinky. Cause these people did not shower. No, they would do this on purpose because to them, committing a carnal sin like a huge ass orgy would be such a bad sin that the repentance process would be really intense. And repenting that hard would bring you closer to God. They're like, I'm only doing this for God. Don't judge me. The practice was called sinning to drive out sin. Like extreme sin would make you extremely close to God. So Rasputin probably loves. I loved this concept because it was like truly embodied who he was. It was naughty, it was an anti leadership. It broke all of the rules. Honestly, it was a feral behavior. But at the end of the day, you were still like a godly person afterwards. So he made this his core doctrine. It's believed that for the next two or three years, while Rasputin was on this wandering journey, he was practicing with the Clistis a lot. I guess, like all those orgies, they just weren't doing it for him. And at some point Rasputin like missed home. So he decided to pack up his things and head back to his village to see his loving wife and children. Because, yeah, he was still married. She didn't need to know what he was up to though, you know. So when he got back to the village, everyone had noticed that something was different. Like he was not the same Rest that left. There was an intense darkness that was surrounding him and rumors that he had fallen in with the Clistes had reached his village. So people were talking. Everyone thought of the Klistes as like a dark anti church cult that was very into pagan rituals. And honestly, they weren't really wrong. His own daughter Maria grew up and wrote about his involvement with the Clistis. Changed her father forever. She said that he definitely attended several ceremonies of theirs and he was even caught preaching their doctrines a few times. Oh shit. And she wrote it all in a book. Not just one, but three different books. Just a little FYI, my birthday is in November, which is coming up here, really Soon. And I wouldn't mind those three books. If you wanna give me something, just let me know. Anyway, at this point, rest. You know, he was really ready for his cult leader era. I mean, he had been preparing his whole life for this moment. And he had what every cult leader needs. A signature look. Oh, and a creepy cave. Even better. Raspy over here. He dug his own chapel out from under the stables at his family home. Yeah, he wanted to create like a spooky little meeting place. It was like, weird, but okay. It was described as a dark cave. Not much else to comment on. And this is where people would come from far and wide to see the mystical man who they'd met on their travels. Mr. Rasputin. The people in the village, they started talking. Of course, they were like, what the hell is going on in that cave? Like, why is he building? He's the. So you know when you're in the mood for something dark and suspenseful, but you don't wanna stare at a screen for, for three hours or something, you know, like, I want to listen to something while I'm washing my makeup brushes. That's when I turn to Audible. Audible is the home of the world's best audio storytelling. Everything from audiobooks and podcasts to original series that you won't hear anywhere else. And if you're into supernatural thrillers, you have to listen to the prophecy. Season two Emmy Award winner Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards. And the cast includes Giancarlo Esposito, Dulay Hill, Renzi Feliz and Ebony Obsidian. Virginia and her son Joshua. They're like on the run from this apocalyptic cult. I was hooked. Do not miss Kerry Washington and Audible's new action packed Must Listen to prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2 that's the number two. And start listening today. If you're a smoker or vaper ready to make a change, you really only need one good reason. But with Zyn nicotine pouches, you'll discover many good reasons. Zynn is America's number one nicotine pouch brand. Plus Zynn offers a robust rewards program. There are of lots, lots of options when it comes to nicotine satisfaction. But there's only one Zinn. Check out zyn.com find to find Zyn at a store near you. Warning. This product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Crazy neighbor. Why'd he build a cave? Now my property value is going to go down because little tootie over here is building a cave. You know, like what the hell that was Rasputin. There were rumors of, like, weird rituals and seances flying around. And he was always seen surrounded by young women that he was allegedly having sex with. I mean, his old doctrine was based on an idea of sexual exhaustion. The more sexually exhausted you get, the closer to God. And it seemed like he was indeed taking that very seriously. And there are even stories out there that say, just like the Khalisti gatherings, Rasputin would preach to the crowd in his cave and then have sex with the congregation or an orgy, you could say. People used to hear these wild animal sounds coming from that cave church. Those who were non believers of Rasputin's teachings just stayed away. You know, they were too scared. So basically, Rasputin's got, like, a good thing going. And he does this for years, just everybody, you know, attracting strangers, earning himself a wacky reputation. Reputation. Teaching people to be horny for God. Solid. But then his visions, they're back. And this time they're even more intense. They're happening more often. And the messages he's getting from the Virgin Mary are much clearer. And this time she's telling him, go to St. Petersburg. And he's like, what's in St. Petersburg? You know, and she's like, the royals. Peace out. I'm the Virgin Mary. Rasputin is like, I'm gonna be just like that guy Makary. I'm gonna get the hell out of the village and get in with the royals. So in 1903, he packs his bags and he leaves his family again and makes his way to the big city. And Russia at the time was the perfect environment for Rasputin, because first, at this time, society was very sexually open, which is weird to think, right? There were ads in the paper for cures to STDs, and they put it all out there. So Rasputin's sexual reputation probably wasn't even a huge deal. And most importantly, Russia at the time was very into the occult, especially the wealthy and powerful. They had way too much time and money on their hands. They just got into whatever they wanted. You know, in St. Petersburg, they were into something called spiritual mystery. Essentially, it means that you believe that some kind of higher power, like God can take over a regular human's body and help them perform miracles. The Royals themselves definitely believed in this. They're like, yeah, that's for sure legit. They loved some old fashioned seances. Ooh, the Ouija board. Ouija board night. Yay. And they were big believers in mystical healing powers. Fun. Maybe Now, Rasputin didn't just get to St. Petersburg and like walk straight into the palace. No. He spent months creating a mysterious and powerful reputation with the rich people of society. People believed Rasputin had some kind of mystical, unknown power to see into the future and heal people. He also just had a very dirty appearance in general. It was said like numerous times that he would have pieces of food stuck in his long beard. A little flavor saver. And when he ate with the upper crust of society, he wasn't going to pretend to have manners. According to journalist Nina Martierres, quote, he licked the spoon before using it to serve others, tore the bread and fish apart with his fingers and wiped them on the tablecloth. End quote. He didn't care if he was eating on the finest of China around the richest of people. He was marching to the beat of his own drum. He's a free spirit and let's be honest, he got off on being non conformist. So I guess Rasputin was known for treating everyone the same, which is like, he doesn't sound that bad. I mean, even to the point of it, like being offensive, though royal or peasant, he would call you by your first name, you know, which is like, kind of scary. Back then. He was a daredevil. He didn't care about society ranks or like who had the most money or who was the most important. He was there to just and like get in with the rich people, you know. Oh, no. And he was said to be very direct with people. Just staring at them with those intense, spooky ass looking eyes. Man, he looks like you don't want to go on a roller coaster. And like, whoa. You know, the way we're talking about Rasputin here makes him sound not that bad. Anyone else? Okay. He was also well known for his hot political takes. I mean, normally that could get you killed or banned from high society, but again, he didn't give a. He was just a shock jock and the people couldn't get enough. I mean, he was said to have a long line of women wanting to be with him. I know. At first I was like, am I looking at the same picture of am I looking at the Rasputin that everyone's talking about? Because this man does not look. What? He's so gross looking. I'm sorry, that's really rude. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I mean, his female fans would kiss his dirty, freshly licked fingers at the dinner table. They would fight over, like, who would get to eat his leftovers. It was a Lot. Pretty soon, people just stopped calling him Rasputin. They started calling him the Saint. Now, just to paint the picture about what it was like in St. Petersburg at this time. Let's talk about who's in power for hundreds and hundreds of years. Before Rasputin was even born, Russia had been ruled monarchy style by a tsar. Now this is essentially a king. And ever since 1613, the Tsar of Russia had come from one family. That family is called the Romanov family. And the Romanovs were. They were it, bitch. They were the fucking shit. Like they were in charge of Russia, which is huge. I mean, the largest country in the world. Hello. And by the time Rasputin makes his way to the big city, they literally already been in power for 300 years. But little did everyone know that one horny little dirtbag was about to rock their world and change every year. Was that a good setup? Okay, let me know down below. So it's the year 1894, and 26 year old Nicholas II is on the Russian throne, being a czar, you know, just popping his. Popping his pussy, like, whatever. His wife, AKA the Tsarina, is a German princess named Alexandra. Fun fact, she's also. She's actually Queen Victoria's granddaughter. Yeah, I know. Small world. It's fucking creepy. Everything's inbred. Anyway, Nicholas and Alexandra, they start to feel some pressure because they have four daughters but no sons. This is not a good look at all. Because at this time, the only way to ensure the Romanov legacy would continue was to have an official heir, a son. Cause girls ain't shit. They don't count. Get out of here. I guess every time Alexandra got pregnant, this would be like, yes, this is it. I feel like, this one's gotta be a boy. It's gonna have a penis. And then, like, whoops, it wasn't. And apparently every time Alexandra had a daughter, her anxiety was just getting worse and worse. She ends up seeking medical help because she just can't handle the pressure that is on her, her and her husband. It's too much. But finally, on August 12, 1904, Nicholas and Alexandra have a son, Alexei Romanov. I know, I know that's not the right song, but it's the only one I know. So. Zarina Alexandra gives birth to a boy. The crowd is going wild. Everyone's relieved. Thank God Russia had a guaranteed legacy at this point. But then the Tsar and Tsarina discover that their son Alexei had a rare condition called hemophilia, which means that his blood couldn't clot. So basically, if you get a paper cut, you could bleed out. And, like, not a great thing, right, for anyone to have, but especially not for the Prince of Russia. Whoever wanted to is carrying on to lead the fricking country one day. Hello. Now, Alexandra in particular was devastated because it turns out this condition came from her side of the family. So everyone's like, mm. It also killed her uncle, her nephew, and even her own brother. So shit doesn't really sound that promising for him. And she really felt like this condition was a death sentence for her son. I mean, it pretty much was. Nicholas and Alex. Alexandra privately consult with doctors to see what they can do, but none of them can do anything to help baby Alexei. At this point, the family wants some privacy from the public, so they end up, like, picking up and moving to the country. So random. But they, like, want to keep their baby Alexei out of the spotlight. Alexandra is worried. She's super worried about him. And it reaches to the point where she stops trusting medical professionals because, honestly, they can't. They can't do anything. They can't fix them. So this is when she leans more into seeking a spiritual relationship or maybe even like spiritual guidance from somebody. So Nicholas and Alexandra start summoning healers to the palace to see what they can do for baby Alexei. And they're going through all these different people, and then eventually, guess what? The final one that they have to go through is Rasputin. Rasputin is first introduced to the Russian court by members of the church. And the upper class. Like, these people wanted the Tsar to have some advisors who were down to earth, holy men, salt to the earth types. You know, because of Rasputin's background, he was perfect for this. On November 1, 1905, there's all this talk about a Russian rebel revolution in the air. And the royals are getting pretty nervous that they're gonna probably, like, lose their power. So Rasputin is summoned to the Royal palace for a casual three hour long chat with the Tsar in the Tsarina of Russia. Oh, and this was like his big break moment. Oh, yeah. Nicholas even wrote about it in his diary. He said, quote, Tuesday, a cold, winter, windy day. The water has frozen in patches from the shore to the end of our canal. Was occupied all morning, went for a walk. We made the acquaintance of a man named Grigori. End quote. I'm imagining that's how he talks, if he talked in English. I mean, can we take a second to acknowledge how insane this is? I mean, in the course of a year, Rasputin went from the Absolute bottom of society, traveling around Russia bare, wearing the same shirt for a year at a time, sleeping on the ground to giving advice to the King and Queen of Russia. It's kind of motivational, huh? We don't know, like, exactly what Rasputin and Tsar Nicholas talked about for those three hours when they first met. But one thing about Rasputin, it was said that he was able to read people extremely well. He had this incredible intuition to understand the person he was talking within minutes of meeting them. And he was able to emotionally manipulate them with, like, barely any effort. But people say they didn't see this. They interpreted his charms as him being psychic or, as they would say, mystical. So after this meeting with the Tsar, he told a friend of his named Feofan how it went. And according to Feofan, Rasputin told him that the Tsarina Alexandra had, quote, fallen under his influence that very first evening, end quote. But it would take longer to win over the Tsar. Rasputin knew he had a once in a lifetime opportunity to get in with the royal family. So four days after meeting them, Rasputin sent Nicholas a letter, which is, like, super polite, right? Great Emperor, Tsar, and autocrat of all Russia, greetings to you. Rasputin goes on to give the Tsar some advice, saying, quote, may God give you sage advice. All of Russia worries she has descended into a terrible argument. She trembles in joy and rings her bells, calling for God. Now, this is wild because it shows, like, right away, after only meeting the Tsar once, Rasputin felt comfortable giving him advice about how to run the country and telling him about, like, what Russia wanted from him. Now, obviously, they couldn't tell Rasputin about their son's condition right away. I mean, the secret of Alexei's condition was a matter of national security. It was top secret because, as one Russian scholar said, quote, alexei was routinely on the brink of death, as even minor bruises could result in unstoppable blood loss and hemorrhaging. End quote. Ooh, that's scary. Nicholas and his advisors believe that if Alexei's hemophilia became public knowledge, it could destabilize the whole country. Like, people would realize just how fragile the monarchy was, and the whole thing could probably crumble, and they didn't want that. What we do know is that at some point, Nicholas and Alexandra let Rasputin in on their secret. And to everyone's surprise, Rasputin did what the best doctors in Russia couldn't do. He stopped Alexei's bleeding. You might be wondering, wait a second. He Stopped the bleeding. Maybe he is magical. Well, here's the thing. During this time period in 1904, science didn't know squaddly shit about hemophilia. And unfortunately, something that doctors did think was helpful was giving them aspirin, I guess, because it did help with the pain, but aspirin is a blood thinner, so it was actually one of, like, the worst things you could give to anyone with hemophilia because it can lead to even more blood being lost from a small injury. And once Rasputin was brought on as Alexei's healer, he didn't let him take aspirin. So his magical powers that cured Alexei could literally just have been not giving him aspirin. Either way, Alexandra was over the freaking moon. She was like, oh, my God, this is the shit. Just like that. Oh, my God. Maybe he's saved. Yay. She didn't just, like, see Rasputin as a healer, but as her son's savior. I mean, naturally, Rasputin becomes one of her favorite people and closest confidant. But the thing is, most of the Russia didn't know that Rasputin actually saved, like, baby Alexei's life. And when they looked at it from afar, you know, seeing Rasputin randomly with the family, it was just, like, a really odd look. So rumors started to spread, naturally, that, like, an affair was happening between Rasputin and Alexandra. Mm. They're like, ooh, they. I mean, by this point, Rasputin had been living at court for about a decade, and he and the Tsarina were obviously extremely close. And then When World War I starts in 1914, this rumor only gets worse because the tsar, Alexandra's husband, leaves to go fight on the front lines. So the Russian people are like, oh, they are for sure. You know? Cause there wasn't anyone around. That's what everyone's saying. Postcards start to circulate that show, like, graphic little cartoons of the Tsarina and Rasputin doing, like, some wild, kinky shit. All of this might sound like National Enquirer gossip magazine shit, but, I mean, it is. But it actually had, like, a really huge impact on Russia. They took this shit, like, you know, very serious. And ever since the Tsar and his family had moved away from the city to, like, try to get out of the limelight, they had completely, like, lost touch with. With their people. 99% of Russians had no idea that Alexei was sick. So they just kind of saw the Tsar and Tsarina as snobby rich people who were out of touch, which wasn't wrong. But they didn't want to hear it, so that's why they moved. And after Germany declared war on Russia In World War I, most Russians hated the Germans. And unfortunately, Tsarina Alexander was a German princess. Hmm, sad. Even though she was essentially their queen, they didn't trust her. And the cherry on the cake was Rasputin. Who the hell was this woo woo peasant who had wormed his way? Who has his way to the top all the way to the palace? What was going on between he and Alexandra while Tsar Nicholas was away? The people had questions to the outside the monarchy. They just look straight up messy. Get it together. Because of this drama with Rasputin, people started to doubt whether the Tsar system was actually still working or whether it was kind of, like, outdated. Was the family still up for the job? They don't know. I'm not going to get into, like, the whole politics of it all, because we did cover some of the Russian revolution in our Stalin episode. But also, it's just, you know, it's a long story. But long story short, a revolution is a brewin. And the Tsar is, like, super busy fighting in World War I that he doesn't even notice. And the Tsarina is too busy taking care of Bibliolecte and having tea with Rasputin. She's too busy sucking his titty that she doesn't even care either. And anyone who's anyone knows if the Tsar and Tsarina need to make a decision, they're gonna run it by Rasputin. He was giving advice on everything related to the government, and it started to piss a lot of people off who had spent some serious time and money to get the attention of the Tsarin Zarina themselves. So, like, how this got. Everyone's jealous. Everyone's. Everyone's mad. Everyone's pissed. Meanwhile, Rasputin had a pretty bad reputation outside the palace for basically being a sex offender. Yeah. So pretty legit reason. I mean, remember that whole, like, you need to be sexually exhausted to find God? Well, it seems like he talked the talk and he also, like, walked the walk. But not always. At least consensually, allegedly. And according to urban legend, this made him many, many enemies. And these enemies would ultimately cost him his life. I mean, good, though. Like, if he rapes people, then fuck you. One woman tried to kill Rasputin, allegedly to get back at him for assaulting her in 1914. Keonia Guseva, she was working as a sex worker. I guess she had, like, straight up attacked Rasputin. She stabbed him in the gut with a dagger Mm. Aspen does. Eyewitnesses say that they saw Rasputin's guts fall out of his stomach while Kiona shouted, quote, I've killed the Antichrist. I mean, she thought she killed him. I mean, heck, Rasputin thought she killed him. Everyone thought he was dead. But somehow, just like, I don't know, like a zombie, he just, like, got up and recovered. I think this must be where the rumors that Rasputin was immortal come from, because who survives their guts falling out of their body? Oh, my God. Even in the cartoon Anastasia, there's a scene where, like, his guts fall out. Ew. That movie's so gross and accurate. Wow. So Rasputin is, like, this unkillable demon. And most of this legend actually comes from the second assassination attempt that Rasputin faced. I'm gonna go home and watch Anastasia and probably, like, cry because he was so scary. Rasputin in that movie was so scary, his skin melted off and stuff. Come on. And it was all real. Fuck. According to urban legend, a man named Yusupov tried to kill Rasputin in 1916. The story goes that Yusupov invited Rasputin to his palace for dinner and, like, served him a platter of cakes and wine. All of it was apparently laced with poison. Like cyanide, to be specific. So Rasputin comes over, and according to Yusupov's memoirs, he starts gorging himself on the poisoned food. But then, like, so some time goes by. TikTok baby. Nothing happens. And Yusupov is like, holy shit. He must be like Batman or something. Like, you can't kill this guy. This guy is unkillable. I mean, he's eaten enough poison to kill, like, 20 men by this point. What the hell? So Yusupoff decides to, like, take matters into his own hands. He instead grabs a gun. I know. He's like, you know what? Fuck it. I'll just grab a gun. And he starts just firing it off. He's like, bing, bing, bing, bing. And, like, the smoke clears, and Rasputin still standing, unaffected, unbothered. Yusupov just can't shoot a gun, I think. But in his book, Yusupov wrote, quote, this devil who was dying of poison, who had a bullet in his heart, must have been raised from the dead by the powers of evil. There was something appalling and monstrous, monstrous in his diabolical refusal to die. End quote. Yeah, that's pretty dark. Yusupov was certain that Rasputin had done some, like, dark magic to become immortal. But unfortunately, Rasputin did die. I would say, fortunately, Rasputin did die. I guess someone finally got to him, although, like, nobody knows who it was. We do know that Yusupov and a group of Russian noblemen came up with a plan to finally get rid of rasputin. And on December 30, 1916, a group of Russian noblemen, most likely including Yusupov, shot Rasputin in the head at close range in the Yusupov's palace grounds. See, the elite of Russian society hated the fact that this peasant, who had come from nothing, had become such an important figure to the Tsar in Tsarina. I mean, they resented him and they saw him was, like, part of the reason that Russian people stopped trusting the monarchy. So he had to be stopped. And, like, they weren't exactly, entirely, fully wrong. I mean, not too long after Rasputin's death, a story came out. Even though he lived in St. Petersburg, people said that Rasputin had basically an open invitation to the palace because he made the Tsar and Tsarina feel confident that a bright revolution was not going to happen. Oops. It was said that he convinced Tsar Nicholas not to flee the country back in 1905, right before things got violent. He apparently told the Czar that he had a vision that all would be well in the end and that Nichols and his family didn't need to, like, fear for their lives. He's like, you guys are totally fine, you're chill. Just, like, hang out, no biggie. Turn on some television, whatever. But spoiler alert, Nah. He was actually really wrong in reality. By the time Rasputin died, the monarchy's reputation was completely in the toilet. And by 1917, Tsar Nicholas was essentially forced to abdicate, aka give up the throne. And he and his family were kept as prisoners for years. All the Romanovs who could manage to get. Get the frick out of the country fled, which Nicholas and Alexandra might have done if, like, Rasputin hadn't made them feel safe and secure, I guess. But sadly, Nicholas and Alexandra and their kids, they were not lucky. All of them were rounded up and killed by a firing squad. And the leaders of the Russian Revolution buried their bodies in unmarked graves. And Nicholas would be the last tsar Russia ever had. That's dramatic. Rasputin's body was buried at a small church in Russia, but during the Russian Revolution, his body was actually burnt to stop people from using his gravesite as a meeting place or like a place to rally. Looking back, I mean, there are a couple different Schools of thought. Some people believe Rasputin was kind of a sacrificial lamb who, like, took the hit for the shift of power brewing during the early Russian Revolution. That his death was basically a lesson for any peasants or lower class people who hoped to rise up the ranks of society. They're like, no, this was what will happen to you. Other people think Rasputin knew exactly what he was doing when he told the tsar and tsarina not to worry about the revolution, that he was actually intentionally bringing about the end of the royal reign. Which kind of like, makes sense because his whole life he believed everyone should be equal. And he refused to give anyone special treatment. Rasputin's daughter, her name is Maria, she actually managed to get out of Russia. She would actually go on to become a lion tamer, you know, no biggie, just a casual job. And it was said that she inherited her father's special ability to communicate with animals and calmed them down with those infamous Rasputin eyes that look so scary. Yeah, hot. She even went on to write a book about her dad. And this book is actually where we get most of our information about Rasputin. The man, the myth, the legend. And here's another fun part. After Rasputin's daughter moved to Paris to do work in the circus, she ran into a group of women, kind of like a fan club. They were obsessed with her dad, and they worshiped his penis. They're like, oh, my God, we love your dad's dick. Apparently, after Rasputin was killed, you soup off, cut off Rasputin's penis. Yes. And then he put it, like, in a jar or something, and he sold it for $8,000. Good for him. And he was literally worshiped years after Rasputin's death. Yeah, he's the dick guy. I know you're wondering. Cause I was wondering the same thing. Does the penis still exist? Yes, it does. It's on display in the Museum of Erotica in St. Petersburg. Some people believe it's actually like, a cow's penis because, I don't know, maybe because it's 13 inches, but I'll let you decide. So if you go there, take a picture and let me know, like, send it to me, because I'll probably never get to see it. Like, I can't fly out there just to see Rasputin's dick. Well, maybe, but some may dick. Look, this guy reminds me of Keith Renery. Did you guys watch out the vow? Shit. This is Keith Renari. He was having sex with everyone, and he's stunk with the long hair. Ugh. Well, thanks for listening. Next week we'll be concluding our spooky season episodes with some of my personal favorite tales. These are stories that have shaped, changed and morphed in society since the dawn of time. And even though they've changed, they've managed to find ways to haunt us to this day. And let's be honest, turn us on. Tune in next week for our episode on Monsters. Remember, don't be afraid to ask questions to get the whole story because you deserve that. And also join me over on my YouTube where you can watch these episodes on Thursday after the podcast airs. And while you're there, you can also catch my murder mystery and makeup. I'd love to hear your guys reactions to today's story, so make sure to use the hashtag dark history over on social media so I can follow along. So now let's read a couple of comments that you guys left me. Yeah, leave a comment. I'll read it below. Destructor Cervantes 9377. He has a very important question for me. Hey, I was wondering, what's your favorite oatmeal? I like apple cinnamon. Oh no, no, no. You don't understand. Destructor L. Listen, I went through this period in my life where all I ate was oatmeal. Like I lived off of oatmeal. It was really all I could afford. And brown sugar was my shit. And still to this day is my shit. Those little pre packets. I didn't like apple cinnamon. That's nasty. But thanks for asking. Destructor. Love ya. Tiffany Bui 2260 hey, left a comment on our fast food episode saying White Castle burgers make me horny with all those little onions. Okay. Brave Forbes edits 2687 had an episode suggestion saying you should do an organ trail episode and an episode about the Orient Express. Ooh. Both are huge interests for me. Although I think an Orient Express video would be great for winter. So maybe you could save it for them. End quote. I love these recommendations because growing up when I was a kid, the Oregon Trail was my shit. That's the hardest game you would ever play. I don't think I've ever beat it. I never gotten that far. Like, like dysentery. Whatever. Everyone died. Everyone starved. It was hard. But then I had to remind myself like, oh yeah, this literally happened to people in history. Like that sucks too. Anyways, so yeah, I'll write it down for sure. I think that'd be a great idea. Thank you for your recommendation. I hope you have a good rest of your day. You make good choices and I'll be talking to you next week. Goodbye. Wow. So, first of all, I think it's time. Safe to say Rasputin maybe needed a shower. Maybe not. I mean, he was obviously doing well. Oh, my God, Paul, you should be Rasputin for Halloween. Ooh, that'd be so fun. Yeah. There were a lot of conspiracy theories that because of how many times Rasputin survived assassination attempts, he could not die because he had allegedly signed some kind of pact with the devil. And then I was like, ooh, you know what that reminded me of Our episode about conspiracy theories. Listen, our conspiracy theory episode was all about our deepest, darkest nightmares coming to life. There's the ghosts of La Llorona, a certified alien abduction, and even a few sleep paralysis demons. Buckle up and maybe turn on a light or two. Hello, and welcome to another episode of Dark History. Come close, my children. Let me tell you a few tales that involve strange encounters. I mean, the strangest, some might say. And these stories take place in a river, in a forest, or on your very streets. The creatures that haunt these stories are straight from our nightmares. Ooh, sometimes literally. Today we're talking about some of the spookiest conspiracy theories out there. I'm talking aliens, demons, and ghosts. Ooh, look, Paul's an alien. Isn't that cute? I love it. What are you, Joan? Psychotic? Listen, we're talking about conspiracy theories. Oh, niche ones, like, well known ones and something so you know when you're in the mood for something dark and suspenseful, but you don't want to stare at a screen for three hours or something, you know, like, I want to listen to something while I. I'm washing my makeup brushes. That's when I turn to Audible. Audible is the home of the world's best audio storytelling, everything from audiobooks and podcasts to original series that you won't hear anywhere else. And if you're into supernatural thrillers, you have to listen to the prophecy. Season two Emmy Award winner Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards. And the cast includes Giancarlo Esposito, Dulay Hill, Renzi Feliz and Ebony Obsidian. Virginia and her son Joshua. They're like on the run from this apocalyptic cult. I was hooked. Do not miss Kerry Washington. And Audible's new action packed Must Listen to prophecy season two. Go to audible.com/ prophecy two. That's the number two. And start listening today like maybe you've never heard of. And in this much detail before. Yeah, that's the goal. Okay, now, I just want to clarify that when I say conspiracy theories, I mean like the kind that you'd probably hear on the discovery channel after 90 Day Fiance. You know, weird, creepy, a little unexplained and fun. Right. Not the crazy one that your uncle is, like, gonna ruin Thanksgiving over. It happens every year. And listen, like, all this naturally started because of a 2am Internet deep dive. Okay, listen. All about a Japanese Kleenex commercial. I know. I was looking it up. Don't ask. This commercial is from the 80s and it shows a woman, just a normal ass woman being a woman. And then there's a child, like, next to her. And we can't figure out is the child dressed as a plant or like an. It has a horn. What plant has a horn? So anyways, it's a baby thing and a woman, I think. And they're using the Kleenex tissues, which makes sense because that's what the commercial's for. Okay. And then this whole thing, them laughing and giggling at each other just goes on for 30 seconds too long, and you're like, what the fuck am I watching right now? But it's underscored with this acapella version of a very uncomfortable song. It's weird. Especially at 2:00am you know when you wake up at 2 and you're like, no. Why demons? That's why he's my favorite. So the voice is haunting and the whole commercial has no plot. And there's like, no reason why this kid should be dressed up as this thing, this plant with a horn. I don't know. But stay with me. Apparently when this first aired, many people felt the same way that I did. Okay? They were creeped the hell out by it. So TV stations were flooded with complaints. There were requests to take it off the air. And then the Kleenex, like the brand itself, they started receiving complaints directly. I know. I don't even know what people were complaining, though. Like, that flying tissue moment in the commercial really spooked me out. Then the rumor started. Okay. There were whispers that the whole crew who had worked on the commercial were dying. Yeah. And that, like, the actors who were in this commercial also, they had been, like, committed to a psychiatric hospital. So, like, something was going on. And some even said that the song itself was a German curse that was translated into English. Sorry, that's goofy. There were claims from people who had heard the commercial, like, come on late at night. And they were like, oh, my God, the song just became distorted and like it was being sung by some creepy old woman who was, like, inside the room with them. It was coming from inside of the house. Okay, I guess none of that was true, but, I mean, the part where, like, people complained was true. People were, like, super disturbed by this innocent little commercial. And, like, to this day, you can find it by searching for cursed Japanese Kleenex commercial. Not that you should. I mean, if you want to go for it, live your life. But I will not be taking any responsibility for any ring style curses that will follow you as a result. Paul, you watched it, right? Man, you good? All right, but listen, I guess no one actually died from mysterious circumstances. But, you know, it's still. I don't know why, but it's still kind of, like, fun to talk about, right? It is creepy though. The music come on. And what's up with that kid? Like, what is he supposed to be? Why does it have a horn? Let me know your thoughts down below. So this next story, low key, kept me up for many, many nights. Okay. It's about a ghost who haunts, captures, and even sometimes kills children and men late at night. Oh, shit. Many have claimed to see her on their streets looking for her next victim. So be on the lookout, okay? Because she's out there. And she's known by the name of La Llorona. La Llorona is a tale popular in Mexico, Central America and South America. And it centers around a Mexican ghost named La Llorona. And look, there are, like so many different types of stories about, like, different encounters people have had with her. And because there's so many different variations as to, like, what she's based on, I'm gonna tell you just the most common version, if that's okay with you. Oh, it is. Okay, great. So La Llorona is a story about a woman, and I guess her real name was Mar. Maria. I know, I thought it'd be like Lorena or something, right? No. Okay. Maria was actually born as the most beautiful woman in all of Mexico. And when she was younger, male suitors would, like, come to her begging for her to marry them. But she just denied them all. Nope. Get in line by that is, until a dashing young man came into town. He was really good looking too. Okay. And he was said to be the only match for her. So Maria obsessed, she is stigmatized. Okay. And she just had to have him. So the two of them get in love, get married, and then not long after that, they have two beautiful sons. So it went from zero to 100 really quick. But it's love. Isn't that what love is? Anyway, so now Maria, she's living her life. She's happy, she's married with two children. And then one day, she catches her husband stepping out on her. Yeah, he rode into town on a horse with another woman. He was cheating on her. The disrespect. I know, hello, I had your two kids. I'm hot for you. And he just cheats. He did. And worse. He apparently had decided to get with this new woman who he just met because he believed that Maria was no longer beautiful. Devastated, Maria lost it. She lost her fucking mind, okay? I mean, what was she supposed to do now? She was the most beautiful woman in all of Mexico. And the mother of his children. Dude, guys suck. So the night that, like, all this happened, Maria, she's trying to go to sleep, right? She's tossing and turning and she can't. She can't do it. So again, she really just fucking snapped. Absolute state of devastation gone. She decides that she wants her husband, this jackass, to feel pain like she was feeling. So Maria went to the bedroom where her two young sons were sleeping, and she woke them up. She's like, you better get the fuck up. I'm sorry. I just imagine her like, you better get the fuck up right now. She wakes up her young son. Get the fuck up. She told them that they were going down to the river, like by their home for a bath. They're like, okay, mom, it's 2:00am but all right, so Maria, she brought her sons to the river where she then submerged her boys into the water and drowned them, right? Like one of those crazy Lifetime movies. And then pretty much right after she did this, she like, comes to her sense and she was completely overcome with regret. And then she, like, absolutely, I would say she lost it, but she already lost it. So she found it and then lost it again and had an emotional breakdown. I mean, she wants to save her kids, but she can't because she killed them. You know, it's too late. So she, Maria is just sobbing and sobbing and sobbing and sobbing. And this is where she gets the name La Llorona, because it translates to the weeping woman. I know they couldn't just call her Maria. Maria comes to the conclusion that the only way she can continue forward is if she kills herself. Okay, look, real life, she hit her rock, rock solid bottom. So she decides to do just that and she drowns herself. But, okay, listen, wrong move. Because Maria had been forbidden to enter the afterlife because of what she's done killing her kids. So she's stuck in Purgatory forever. And look, Purgatory is a space in between Heaven and hell, like, where you have to, like, wait to be sentenced while Maria's fate was, like, worse than hell. The legend goes that she's stuck on Earth, still haunting, searching for children to call her own and join her in Purgatory. Little fun fact here. She's known to show up three days after it rains. I was like, all right, gotta really plan this out. Okay. There's this tale that Maria, you know, La Llorona, she would take ghost form and she would have. Sorry, that's Ghost Farm. And she would wander around schools and foster homes just weeping, you know, looking for her kids. And if she saw someone who looked like one of her children, she would cut that feature, snatch it out of their face. Just. In many cultures, children fear her because there have been some instances where La Llorona just is terrorizing them. And, I mean, it's not just kids. Sometimes she appears to be a temptress spirit. I know. It's like, ooh, okay. Like, she seduces men. So if she sees one of them alone late at night, she'll seduce them, and she'll act like a helpless, helpless, sad woman. She's walking around just like, sir, I can't open this peanut butter jar. I need your big, strong muscles. And they fall for it every time. She's like, my pickle jar won't open. I need someone with big, strong muscles to help me out. That's how I imagine she does it. Anyway, so as soon as a man hears this cry, you know, they offer. They offer her her help. And at that moment, when they see her face, it's said to have, like, morphed into a skull or a crazy looking horse head. Nay, nay. Horse head. Nay, nay. You get it? Okay. So even spookier sometimes, if you don't get the horse or the skull, sometimes her face is said to just completely disappear. Usually the men get a. But they're left traumatized for years to come. I don't blame them. Just reminding everybody else to fear La Llorona. They're like, listen, she's not coming for the kids. She's coming for us. If she mentions a pickle jar, run. Okay? There are other stories about her tempting officers that are roaming, like, the streets at night. She would walk around in a white coat with a white shawl covering her head and face. I know. Very angelic. She's like. And La Llorona begins engaging, engaging with him. Ma, ma, ma. Ma, ma, ma ma ma. Engaging. Until their relationship turns physical. Yeah. And I guess they start going at it. Having sex in the streets. I would like to see that happen. You're having sex with a ghost in the street? What is this even getting. What are we doing here? Dark history in the middle of getting. Getting it on. Okay. This one experience that a police officer had, he's like, take off your shawl. You know, I want to see your beautiful face. Sorry. He's like, I want to see your beautiful face, babe. So she's like, oh, my God. Okay. She smiles, she takes off the shaw, exposing a big old grinning skeleton head. No mask, real head. Could you imagine? He probably still finished, though. I would bet. I bet you he right then he's like, oh, okay, okay. La Llorona then leans over and gushes of icy breath come out of her mouth. And it's like super icy cold breath is coming out. It's almost like she just ate, like, a whole pack of those Listerine strips. The green ones, specifically. Yeah, I know, I know. You accidentally grab two and you put those in and you're like, just me. Okay. Anyway, the icy cold breath that's coming out, it turns the man frozen solid. That's what he gets. Just putting his dick in someone. He just didn't even ask him. Like, he didn't even see their face. But okay. Anyways, he's frozen solid, so then he defrosts and he comes back to life, obviously. Absolutely traumatized. To this day, many people, like, still believe in La Llorona. Like, kids are still very terrified of her. People still think they see her roaming, weeping in the streets. But I think the lesson here is don't have sex with ghosts that you just met. Maybe ask them to see their face first. Get some standards. Gentlemen, come on. Are Paul's coming for you. The next conspiracy theory I'm gonna talk about. It's not really even a conspiracy theory because it's, like kind of a. It's a hot topic currently, Right? And, like, it has been for decades. And look, finally, the American government has confirmed what Tom DeLong has been saying for years. Aliens are real. I know. I think we all kind of knew, right? No, you didn't. Oh, okay. Well, honestly, it kind of feels like the world is on fire and everything is ending and everything is bad. So it's like, it's hard to really care. It's, like, added to the list. Am I right? Anyways, it all, of course, made me wonder, like, oh, yeah, when did this whole alien craze Thing start. I start noodling, you know, why do we think of them as those big eyed green monsters in, like, an electric spaceship? Well, what you're about to learn will prove our alien friends are quite mysterious and also quite terrifying. Can I just tell you my alien theory really quick before anyone else steals it? Okay, great. So here's my idea of what an alien is, okay? So they're us in the future. They have bigger eyes because they need the bigger eyes for all the screens that we're using, right? Our eyes get big and then they have those long, skinny fingers. Better to point all these fucking screens with, right? We don't need bones. Everything's a little floppy and skinny because we're not walking or anything. And then we have a big brain because of how much knowledge we're gaining from the technology and constantly learning. Come for me. You can't, because I think I'm onto something. Right, Paul? Great. Our story today takes place in New Hampshire, 1961, where newlyweds Barney and Betty were starting to, like, live their new lives together. So one night, they were driving back home from a fun vacation at Niagara Falls. I've never been, actually. Is it fun? Anyways, they said it was fun. And the route that they were taking was nothing. It really wasn't anything new to them. But something was different on this trip, okay? During the ride, Betty, she looked out of her. She looked out of the passenger window and she looked to the sky, and she's like, oh, my God. Cute. She sees a falling star. What do you do when you see a falling star? Oh, my God. Wishes. And that's what Betty does, wishes. But Betty, looking at the star, she was mistaken. She's like, wait a minute. That star is being real weird, okay? It was not a shooting star. This shooting star, it just stopped midair. Do you still get the wish? I know, I don't know, but it just stops and it's hanging in the night sky. And Betty's like, what the fuck? What is that? During this time, President Kennedy was telling the public that, like, he was gonna put a man on the moon. So everyone's like, fuck, yeah, he's doing it. So Betty was thinking at the time that it had to be something. She's like, maybe it's related to that, the man on the moon thing. But she was kind of excited to see it. So she tells her husband, Barney, who was driving. She's like, barney, I love you, you love me. We're. We're a happy family. And then she's like, you should Pull over. So then they pull over because they want to get a better look at whatever, you know, was in. What was it? I don't know. Once they do. So Barney's like, I want to get my binoculars. And that's when, you know, it's kind of serious. So Barney was like, I think it's an airplane. And they're just continuing. They're continuing to watch. But then suddenly, the object just started moving erratically. Like what? Different directions. What is it doing? You couldn't predict where was it gonna go. And then all of a sudden, it just stopped. And then it kind of just hovered in the sky above them. I would be shitting my pants. I swear. I don't like that. I don't like that. Look, the both of them, they thought it was a little weird, so they just decided to go back into their car and just continue on their drive home. Only the hovering object thing, it didn't disappear. It's not like it stayed behind. It actually felt like it kind of was following them. And even worse, when they were driving, the thingy was getting closer and closer and, like, closing in on them. And then that's when Betty and Barney started to panic, because I think all of us would be Barney. He stops the car. He pulls out a pair of binoculars again. I know. I don't know why he just didn't put it around his neck, but he put them away and he went to inspect what the hell was stalking him and his wife. I mean, really. So through the binoculars, Barney saw an object that he thought was about 100ft away. And it was hovering, like, right above them. It was shaped kind of like a flat circular disc. And inside he saw something that was even stranger. He saw around 11 of these greenish gray, human like creatures driving the strange aircraft. Blue man group, is that you? No, because they were green. Green, gray, but kind of same vibe, I would imagine. So. Look, I can't breathe because I'm getting all worked up over this story. Aliens freak me out. But listen, after watching them for a while, Barney started to get, like, a sinking feeling. He suddenly believed that, like, these weird creatures were trying to capture him. So he starts running back to Betty. He's like, get in the car. So the two of them, they get in the car, and Barney just, you know, great pedal to the metal, tearing down the fricking road. They are going home. I mean, they were both, like, really freaked out. As they, like, sped down the highway, they both heard some kind of buzzing tones. It was like, I don't know what Kind of buzzing, but like, they said buzzing that seemed to be coming from the trunk of their car. But there was, like, nothing in there that should be buzzing. They're like, we just gotta get home. So they're driving faster, okay? They were both so scared that they were driving in absolute silence. And you know when you sit in silence, something ain't right. Okay? Something ain't right. Either you're in trouble or you're both scared. Then things get a little blurry for the two of them. According to Barney and Betty, the last thing that they remember hearing was that buzzing sound and then seeing an orange orb above them. It could have been like a Burger King sign. Maybe they were. Maybe they were. Maybe they just, like, didn't know anyways, but it was orange, so they remember there was also a roadblock. They also remember discussing, like, finding somewhere to pull the car into. So eventually they made it back to their home in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. And they both like, walk into the door and they look at the clock and they're like, oh, yeah, it's probably like 3am because that's the time that they were really expecting to come home from their drive. But they look at the clock, okay? And then they realize that it's actually 5am and they're like, that can't be right. That means like two hours have just passed. And, like, we have no idea where that time went. We have no memory of it. So then they realize. Realized when they got home, Barney's shoes were all scuffed up and Betty's dress was torn like on the titty. And both of their watches had stopped working. They're like, what the fuck? They stepped outside and they look up at the sky and they're just like scared out of their mind, okay? They don't want to see that scary ass little aircraft thing again. So after some time passes, the two of them, they felt safe enough to like, go to bed. I imagine it would, like, be really hard to go to bed that night because you just can't remember shit. But what else are you supposed to do? I don't know. The next morning, over a cup of coffee, Barney and Betty, they kind of like debriefed what happened to them. They both had these super strong feelings that whatever they had seen last night, maybe they felt like it was still around. So they kept going outside and checking and like looking around, but they didn't see anything. And it was kind of like, what are we even looking for Exactly? Just a flying disc. I don't know. Green people, Paul. Because if that's what an alien looks like, I would be a little confused, honestly. I would be like, ah, wasn't expecting that. But okay. Anyway, so then Barney had an idea. He told me, Betty, that they should both get a piece of paper. Arts and crafts time. They should separate and, like, draw what they had seen following them the night before. You draw, and I'm gonna draw bbs. Separate, Bebe. You drawing Bebe, bb? I'm drawing bb. Okay, that's just a cute, like, couple's name, bb. So they're kind of just, like, testing their memory. So when they were done, they got together and they combined the pictures, and that's when they realized that their drawings were pretty much the same thing. I know both of them had drawn a long, flat aircraft, the one that they believed had been following them. I don't want to discredit them, but, I mean, you could just draw, like, a circle. Is it just a circle? You know? Okay, so Barney, he did not want to tell anybody what happened, Okay? I mean, he didn't want the stigma or embarrassment to follow them. In their small town, everyone knew everyone's business. And back then, saying you saw an alien made you sound crazy. And you don't want to be labeled crazy. Small towns don't like that. Most of all, he didn't want to speak up. Not just because people didn't believe it in the aliens, but Barney and Betty were an interracial couple. Now, this was 1961, and as a black man, Barney may have, like, been trying to avoid any additional negative attention. Plus, both Barney and Betty had already been married once. And that probably doesn't sound like a big deal to you and I, but back then, getting remarried, not I. They had reportedly shown prejudice against Barney when they got together. Betty, though, you know, she was itching to tell people about this alien experience, okay? She didn't want to keep their experience a secret, you know? And it's like, what. What do us women do best? Telling secrets. We love to tell people secrets that we're not supposed to tell anybody. Don't lie. When you got a secret, you can't wait to tell somebody, right? Anyway, so, like, Betty's like, oh, my God, I don't need to tell someone, okay? She had some of the best gossip of all time. No one could beat her. So she's like, who do I call? I gotta tell someone. Her sister. She's like, she's my sister. She's not a friend. So you told me not to tell my friends. That's your fault. Also, Apparently, Betty's sister Janet had, like, seen some shit around 10 years ago. I don't know what's going on with this family, but they've been. They've been seeing shit for a while. So whatever she had saw, it sounded a lot like the aircraft that Betty had saw. Okay? So Betty, naturally, is like, dude, if anyone's going to understand, it's my sister. So after listening to Betty's story, Jeanette went, like. Went to work figuring out who exactly they should report this to. Like, who do you call? I know you're all gonna say ghostbuster. You done? Okay, great. Who do you really call exactly? Okay, Pentagon. Are they in the Yellow Pages? I don't know. FBI? I don't know. Men in Black. What's their number? So Betty convinced Barney that they should ask some people for advice. Poor Barney. He's like, please, no, but, babe, I have to. It's my experience. I know how we are. We win every time. Anyway, so they decide, okay, if we're gonna tell someone, we should maybe talk to our neighbors. In between all of these conversations, they were convinced to maybe go under hypnosis. Okay? So they believe that this was, like, the only way that they would ever get to figure out what happened during those lost hours, those two hours that were just gone. They find a hypnosis person. They go into separate rooms for separate hypnosis sessions, okay? Not in the same room. Once under hypnosis, they both revealed some, like, terrifying shit. That's the best way I could put it. Betty in particular. There's even an audio recording of the hypnosis session. And it's freaky. I wasn't afraid. I was afraid when I saw the men in the rope. The men in the rope. I never felt so afraid of my life. Tell me about the men in the room. It's all right now. You're safe here. I'm like, this is a lot scared. So Betty had this memory of Barney pulling over the car, okay? She's in hypnosis. A memory comes forward. She's like, I remember Barney pulling over the car. She then remembered both had stepped out of the car and onto the road. And in front of them, they saw, like, some kind of shadows of what they thought were these very tall, somewhat scary men. Behind them, there was, like, this fiery orange colored orb. Burger King, I'm telling you. Betty turned to Barney and asked him, like, are we getting robbed? Who are they? And Barney just looked at her and said, quote, it's them. I'm like, barney, you know these guys you met them before Barney could told you. Anyway, so these strange greenish gray creatures approached Betty and Barney. And one of them took Betty by the hand and like, guided her through the forest. Yeah, like going through the forest. And he's like, come onto my spaceship. Betty recalls losing consciousness, right? And then she wakes up up, and she's inside the spaceship. When they woke up, Barney and Betty were immediately separated and taken into different rooms. This is on the ship. It was clear right away that these creatures, they wanted to examine their bodies, but like, not in a so hot way. So Betty recalls these creatures having her lie flat face down on the examination table. And these creatures, they pressed all these like weird tools against her body. And then she says that they took skin samples. Okay. Once they're done with their skin sampling, they lead Betty into another room. And there, this part is like, oh, there she's introduced to a creature named or called the Examiner. I was like, okay, what's this? You know, examiner of what? Alien. Daddy, I'm just kidding. That's not funny. So this examiner guy, alien, he tells her not to worry. He. Then this is where it gets a little freaky because he turns her around. He then unzips her dress. Yeah. Then he tells her to lay down. And on the examination table, face up. Listen, I was like, what is going on right now? I want to know. Okay? But it wasn't good because he examines. Sorry, Paul, I'm getting. I'm imagining dirty things with your kind. Let me erase it. I apologize. So he examines her for a little bit and then he turns around and he tells not to worry. He's like, we're just gonna do one more little test on you. Okay, sweetie? Close those eyes. So when he turns around, he's holding a huge syringe, like a big ass needle. And he then says he's going to insert this needle into her navel. I was like, no, he is not. No, I was into this until you did that shit. Mr. Alien. Oh, examiner. Okay, so right away, obviously. Cause all of us would be freaking out. Betty was freaking out. This creature examiner guy, he takes a syringe and he slowly, like, insert it into her navel. Ouch. Betty starts crying out in pain. You know, she's telling them that it hurts. And then another creature comes to her. She's yelling on the table. She's like, no. The creature comes to her and he stands by the top of her head and tells her not to worry, she won't feel any pain. And he puts his like, creepy ass little creature hand, probably Looks like this or some shit over her face, right? And then that's it. That's the last time or that's the last memory she has, like, on the spaceship. This is all what she said during her hypnosis. So I believe it. Why not? You got nothing to lose. I believe it. Betty. While Betty was recounting in the last horrifying detail, she also told the doctor that she still had soreness, like, in her navel area. She also claimed that when she asked one of the creatures, like, where he was from, he showed her a star map, and he's like, we're from over here showing her on that map. When Betty was doing the hypnosis, they asked her to, like, recreate the strange star map, and she did. Okay, so I looked at the strange star map right now, and honestly, it looks like a dick. It looks like she drew a dick and balls. And it was a. All over the universe. Betty. I don't know if I can get behind you on this one. He just drew a dick. Really? It's kind of beautiful, really. Betty. Wow. Art. After Barney and Betty came out of hypnosis, their stories, they ended up being compared by a man named Dr. Simon. And even though, like, he had supervised the hypnosis, Dr. Simon was not convinced of what they uncovered. He thought the entire abduction story was a shared delusion based on a nightmare that Betty had. Uh. Oh. He also pointed out that there were differences in their stories. For example, Barney said the creatures who abducted them, like, didn't have mouths. No mouths. While Betty said that they spoke English. Okay, so at this point, like, you might be thinking, this whole alien encounter, it sounds familiar. Failure. I mean, it's been around. It was, like, the hottest thing in the media at the time. And since then, a lot of UFO encounters have been very similar to what they reported. There's this theory called so you know when you're in the mood for something dark and suspenseful, but you don't want to stare at a screen for three hours or something? You know, like, I want to listen to something while I'm washing my makeup brushes. That's when I turn to audible. Audible is the home of the world's best audio storytelling. Everything from audiobooks and podcasts to original series that you won't hear anywhere else. And if you're into supernatural thrillers, you have to listen to the prophecy. Season two Emmy Award winner Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards. Words. And the cast includes Giancarlo Esposito, Dulay Hill, Renzi Feliz and Ebony Obsidian Virginia and her son Joshua. They're, like, on the run from this apocalyptic cult. I was hooked. Do not miss Kerry Washington. And Audible's new action packed Must Listen to prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2. That's the number two. And so start listening today. Accidental awareness. And when I heard this, I was like, wait a minute. I've never heard of this before. And it kind of makes sense because an analyst named David B. Forest has pointed out something very interesting. The stories of alien abductions are, like, actually very similar to what you would experience in an operating room when you're being put under anesthesia. Okay, but think about it. It sounds a little kooky, but listen, you're under a bright light being poked and, like, prodded. People are speaking English, but when you're getting put under, it's like, are they speaking English? Because it's kind of like, you're like, I think that's English. And then you just respond to the doctor. Yeah, do it. And then you wake up with big tits. I'm just kidding. Okay, but listen. Even Barney's version of aliens not having mouths could be explained by the surgical mask that doctors wear. The greenish gray color of aliens, same color of, like, the scrubs that would be worn by everyone in the operating room. It's kind of making sense. Barney was asked if the alien encounter felt anything like the tonsillectomy he had gone through. And he confirmed it was, quote, like that, end quote. But his eyes were closed. Wow. Accidental awareness is something that is actually still studied today. But usually it doesn't come in the form of remembering alien encounters. It's typically about any situation where a patient is aware while a surgery is going on, which, honestly sounds more awful than an alien abduction. But many who experience this live with, like, PTSD and experience flashbacks. And, like, sometimes these are brought on by something that might stimulate their brain in the same way, you know? So maybe a bright light sent Barney into a flashback of the surgery he'd had, and he later remembered it as, like, an alien abduction. I don't. I mean, we don't know. Maybe he really was abducted by aliens and that just triggered a flashback. I don't know. Don't ask me. I'm just, like, talking 60 years later, and the jury is honestly still out on what, like, Barney and Betty experienced that night. To this day. There's a plaque. Yeah, there's a cute little plaque, like, on the New Hampshire road where the incident took place. Send me a picture. If you see it throughout the year Betty has been said to be visited by aliens numerous times and probed. If you're like me at all. The word accidental awareness made you immediately think of sleep paralysis. I think it does. It goes. It makes sense, right? If you've never heard of it or, like, experienced sleep paralysis. Lucky you. Okay, because what I'm about to tell you seems so out there, you're gonna be like, mm, mm, no way. No, but it's true. But it affects 40% of the population and there's no known cure. Slap my ass and call me a donkey, because today I'm talking about supposed to sleep paralysis. Okay? My breath. Sleep paralysis, it varies from person to person. But the defining symptom that everyone has in common is. Atonia. I know, it sounds like a really cute name. Atonia. Atonia. Come here, Mayfair dog. Come here. Atonia. No, no, no. A girl. Aton time for school. Give me credit if you name your kid that. Thank you. Atonia is the technical term for, like, when you're suddenly not able to move or speak. Most often say it happens when you feel like you've just woken up from, like, being asleep. You're very groggy, everything's heavy, and you're not fully, like. You're just not, like, awake yet. But you are. Imagine you wake up, you can see everything in your room, but. And everything looks normal. And everything looks normal, but you can't move your body at all. It's horrifying. People who experience sleep paralysis sometimes also report, like, difficulty breathing and even chest pains. Like, that's terrifying enough. But it is also usually accompanied by something. By seeing something. Okay. It's spooky. What people see can vary, but it always is something absolutely nightmarish. If you've heard the phrase sleep paralysis demon, then you already know where I'm going to. Most people who experience sleep paralysis, they see what, like, they describe as a demon, a succubus, an impression. Or Brad, their neighbor. He's always at the end of my bed. Anyways, so this is, like, when they see this thing, they can't move. And this is accompanied by, like, a feeling of overwhelming fear, dread, and suffocation. Yeah, so it's not really a good time, I would say. Now, people can, like, really see a lot of different things when they're experiencing this. But across time, literally across time, in various cultures, many people report on seeing the same thing. A demon. But the weird thing is that the incubus phenomenon has been around for, like, ever. Like, as long as we've known, there are many sleep demons that appear throughout different cultures that are pretty similar. During the Middle Ages in Europe, there was one extremely common nightmare that was written about. People would wake up and find a, quote, supernatural entity sitting on their chest, attempting to take a shit on them. I'm just kidding. Not that kind of demon. This is a different demon. It sits on their chest, and it, like, attempts to suffocate them. So then a little later, during the Enlightenment meant a man named Henry Fuseli, who was a Swiss English painter, he created a piece called the Nightmare. Oh, it's spooky. And this painting shows something super similar to, like, what all of these people for years have reported seeing. An impish creature perched on the chest of a sleeping woman. On top of that, in this painting, there's also a terrifying horse in the background. Terrifying horse, Which I don't think has anything to do with sleep paralysis. But, like, is that you, Lalia, right now, girl, are you hiding in that painting? She was hiding in there. It's her, I think. You can't prove me wrong. Prove me wrong. Exactly. Anyways, Lalia, right now, all the way around the freaking globe is Brazil, right? There's a creature that's known for standing on people's chest, haunting them in their sleep, and it's called Pisadira. Pisadira. Come on, tell me, like, there's, like, correlation. Pisidera. Pisidera has been described as a, quote, a crone with long fingernails who lurks on rooftops and tramples on the chest of those who sleep on a full stomach. Dun, dun, dun. I love cereal before I go to bed, though. I mean, look, it's like there are just a lot of coincidences, right? In a part of Canada called New Finland, they call this sleep paralysis demon in egg rog. I think that's how you say Egra. I don't know. You guys always let me know. And in Egypt, they believe that this demon is caused by djinn. Not the drink. I know, but too much djinn does make me feel like a demon is squatting on my chest. Thank you. Thank you. I'm here all day. Okay. Djinn are evil spirits that traditionally take snake form, but apparently they can also, like, become scorpions, lizards, and even humans. And then they get freaky because even these. The djinn can engage in sexual affairs with humans and produce offspring. Hot. I don't know how else to put it. Like, okay, what are we doing here? Oh, let me tell you my story, because I unfortunately have experienced sleep paralysis one time, and I hope that's it never again. Because it was the scariest thing I've ever felt. All right, So I was home alone, sleeping in my bed, just being cute. Thoughts and prayers. And I wake up, right? I wake up. It had to be like 2 or 3 in the morning. And I could not move my body. I was like, okay, I'm awake, you know? I was like, move. Nothing was happening. I was like, what the fuck is going on? So I'm just laying there like, this is weird. And then I hear the stairs creaking. It was like somebody was taking a step. It was like. Like somebody heavy, I swear to you. And I couldn't move. I was like. I was like, is someone coming? And then I could hear it getting closer. And, like, coming up the stairs, he was coming. And I was like, oh, my God, wake up. Wake up. But I couldn't wake up. It was so stupid. I was like, listen. And then one of the things I was also thinking was like, thank God I locked my door. That demon or whatever it is, can't get in. Whatever it was, it stopped right outside the door of the room that I was sleeping in. And I was home alone. Did I say that? Because I was. And I swear to you, I was just laying there like, please help me. And I could hear my door thing jiggling. I don't want to experience this again. And I swear it was like, whatever it is was big and heavy and it was coming towards me and I couldn't move. Okay, and that's my review. Thank you. I give it 2 out of 5 stars. Would not recommend. I give it 2 stars because it was kind of thrilling. Like I felt like I was in a horror film. I was like, I get it now. So that's my experience. And I know some of you out there have had the same thing. So as scary as it is, because it's terrifying, nobody gets hurt or has been killed by sleep paralysis, right? Well, no. Oh, my God. Because let me introduce you to the worst phrase since sleep paralysis. It's called Sudden Unexpected Death Syndrome. They got a name for everything. In the early 1980s, sudden unexpected death syndrome caused the death of 117 Hmong refugees. So that was over 100 people who died in their sleep. No cause, no explanation. Dead. So of the victims, 116 were men and one was a woman. And all of a them were in good health at the time of their death. Their median age was 33 and all died within two years of arriving in the United States. So it was like very similar stories. Doctors were Absolutely stumped at, like, what was causing this case of sons among the refugees. I mean, hence the name Sudden Unexpected Death Syndrome. They could have just called it, like, oh, I lost a nail. Since medical doctors couldn't explain the event from a physical point of view, Dr. Shelley Adler, who has a PhD in folklore and ethnomedicine, so she studies the phenomenon of sons to try and answer, like, why? Why does this happen from a cultural lens? Because it might make sense, right? Just like the many other cultures we've already talked about, the Hmong people also had a name for the sleep paralysis demon, Dab Sog. And just like the others, Dab Sog is believed to be like an evil spirit which can take the form of a creature and it lays on people's chest, and then it suffocates them in their sleep. I mean, at their most vulnerable, you're sleeping, you're having dreams and wishes, and then suffocated. So some of the refugees, when they spoke to doctors, they mentioned having experienced, like, sleep paralysis happening or even being visited by the DAB SOG. So Dr. Adler decided to study the Hmong people and their relationship to Dab Sog. So I guess there was, like, a belief that if the Hmong people didn't worship their gods properly and perform, you know, certain rituals or honor the memory of their ancestors, they would be left unprotected from the Dab Sog. I know it's a lot of pressure. You're like, damn, I got a lot to do today, though. So once a person sees the Dab Sog, they would need to see a shaman in order to make it go away before it killed them. Unfortunately, because the majority of these Hmong refugees were ran throughout the United States, most of them did not have, like, any access to a shaman or, like, any type of elder from their community. I mean, they barely had community at this point. The stress of being far from home and then seeing, like, an evil spirit at night with no means to fix it, it's enough to up anyone's stress levels. So after her years of research, Dr. Adler came to the conclusion that it was this type of, like, stress which most likely led to the deaths of the refugees. And she claimed that the stress of cultural displacement and resettling in the United States, along with the powerlessness they felt and war trauma that they were still dealing with, led to the men dying of sons. I mean, that kind of makes sense. Like, your body is just, like, stressed the fuck out and overworking. And, you know, I could see that. And she believed that if they had been able to rely on cultural practices to alleviate some of the stress, like maybe, I don't know, they could have saw a shaman, the deaths may have like, not happened at all. Another researcher, this one, like, studied the cases of 45 of the Hmong's son's death, found that 39 of the men had a strong belief and fear of evil spirits before their death. Spooky, I know. So it only reinforced the same conclusion that Dr. Adler had come to. Now there is like a conflicting theory that their deaths were caused by a genetic cardiac arrhythmia. Science. Someone brings in the science idea and they're like, ugh. Boo. Cardiac arrhythmia is like a condition that's very rare, but it's more widespread in Southeast Asia where the Hmong people had came from. So I don't think these two theories oppose each other. You know, like, both can be true at the same time, right? These people could have had a pre existing heart condition that wouldn't have like been an issue at all if not for the crazy amounts of stress they were under because of the freaking dab sog. High levels of anxiety can contribute to actual physical conditions. And that is exactly what like, could have happened here. There's actually a study that is connecting the link between anxiety and the physical response. And it's something called the nocebo effect. It might sound familiar because it's the opposite of the placebo effect. Noce. Placebo. Placebo. That's cute. So just like a person can experience positive results despite not receiving like actual medication. Like, with the placebo effect, patients who are told they are being exposed to something negative can experience like real life negative side effects. So, like, if you're thinking bad, you're gonna get bad. If you're thinking good, you're gonna get good. It's that same mindset, right? Patients who are made to feel anxious by a doctor before a procedure will then require like a higher dose of opiates to feel better after surgery. So when a population of people have been told that they can be killed by like a negative spirit, it makes sense that they could experience real negative, like physical effects. Especially when you consider that many of these people, whatever, have seen people around them dying after having an encounter with that exact spirit. Now, of course, like, modern science has an explanation for like why sleep paralysis happens. It's when people are experiencing a REM state, but out of order. Stick with me here. I know sleep, Mimi. Yes. So while you're in deep sleep, in other words, REM sleep. Your body pretty much shuts down down your ability to move, but you don't know it because you're asleep. So you're essentially kind of paralyzed for a minute. And it's actually a good thing. It is, because like, if you're having a dream that you're jumping out of a window, you don't want to be jumping out of a window in real life. Maybe you're being chased by a bear or brat, a neighbor. Another thing about sleep is that the body is designed to stay uncomfortable conscious while you sleep, obviously. And many of us dream while we're asleep, which is technically a hallucination. So sleep paralysis can be explained scientifically as a result of these functions happening in the wrong order. Like, you're still paralyzed and still hallucinating. You're still having a dream, but your body, no, your mind mind is awake. It's like your brain hasn't fully caught up to the awake part yet. And when it eventually does catch up, the sleep paralysis ends. Which is why most accounts of sleep paralysis only last for a few brief, terrifying moments. A sleep paralysis demon, whether it appears as a witch, a ghost, an animal, or Brad, is what's called a hypnopompic hallucination. So this is also known as the incubus phenomenon, but no Brandon Boyd involved. I know. Bummer for us. According to Dr. Mark Muhlendike, a psychologist at Leiden University in the Netherlands, the incubus phenomenon is rare. I mean, people, like, aren't reporting that they have have sleep paralysis and like, see their high school theater teacher yelling at them because they forgot their tap routine. You know, people just don't seem to be seeing goofy shit or even like scary animals during sleep paralysis. It's always just demons. Rude. Ultimately, science can only guess because the truth is. Truth is no one knows exactly what causes sleep paralysis. What we do know is that people whose sleep cycle is disrupted by jet lag or like, or shift work can be at higher risk for sleep paralysis. But there's like no solid scientific explanation for why it's happening in the first place. So we have to turn to the occult. I know it seems like a big job, but maybe it is. Demons. Look, this is just a very long way of saying that nightmares can indeed kill you. Sorry, girl, it's over. We're all done. So the experience of waking up unable to move or breathe and seeing like a scary ass monster hovering over you is timeless. Like a diamond, just time. Timeless. Breathtaking. A worldwide phenomenon. Being a human, it's just so special, isn't it? We've got opposable thumbs, logical thinking, and a universal nightmare demon that like, sits on our chests every night. But hey, look, look, look, look. Take comfort in knowing that it might not happen. Instead, aliens might abduct you on your drive home and a crying lady ghost might morph into a horse when you try to help her open a jar of peanut butter. Plenty can come and, like, get you before the sleep demons have a chance. You're slippery when wet. Anyway, you guys, I hope you have a happy spooky season and thank you for listening. Next week we'll be talking about someone many of you have requested a follow up episode on and we see your comments. Okay, next week we'll be talking about the most mythical man in all of Russia. What's that song? It's kind of a bop. Oh. He's known for being close to the royal Romanov family. And I hate to burst your bubble, but he never had a talking bat named Bartok or a kick ass musical number. Honestly, a bop? If they played that in the club, you'd catch me. Okay. But I will say this, he does have one hell of a story. So what you're going to need to do is to tune in next week because we're doing an episode on Rasputin. Hey, Rasput. Can I call you Spute Sputy Putin? I hope you learned something new in today's story. Don't take candy from strangers. And remember, you can join me over on my YouTube where you can watch these episodes on Thursday after the podcast airs because maybe you want to see what. What I look like. Here I am. And then while you're there, what you're also gonna wanna do is catch my murder mystery and makeup because it's like true crime and there's makeup. Great. I hope to see you there. I can't wait. Now, I'd love to hear your guys reactions to today's story. So make sure to use the hashtag darkhistory over on social media so I can stalk you and see what you're doing. I will get my binoculars out. I am serious. Now let's read what our viewers have to say. Dara Temple had a little suggestion for a new show. Quote, I can picture an animated series of Bailey Sarian and she's got Joan and Paul with her. So cool. The universe has got to let it happen. End quote. Honestly, I love this and I support this decision. I will only do the series of the people who animated Daria or Beavis and Butthead. Can do it for me. I hope to see some emails when I get home. Thank you. Thank you. And Paul, too. We all gotta be there. Linda. Linda.bet4254 left a comment on our fast food episode saying, quote, there is actually an app called McBroken which maps all the McDonald's in your area and lets you do know if the ice cream machine is broken. End quote. You know what, Linda, Linda, Linda, listen. I knew about this, but I was trying to keep it on the DL because I was like, if everyone knows the app's gonna crash, it's barely hanging on. But you know what? I should stop being an asshole and be more like Linda and let the people know. But then the lines are gonna be longer. Linda, Linda, come on. Now I'm gonna have to wait long. Okay, well, thanks, Linda. Appreciate you. You're a gift. Amy Angerer 6966 had a suggestion for an episode. Quote, Nellie Bly needs to be a dark history subject. She wasn't the Darkness, but she exposed so many horrific underbellies. As one of the first female investigative reporters, her topics would make an awesome episode. End quote. Wow, Amy. I did a quick little search on Nellie. I was like, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Asylum expose came up and, Amy, honey, listen, I'm intrigued. Give me a pot of coffee going, you know, and some donuts. I'm in. I hope you have a good rest of your day. You make good choices, and I'll be talking to you next week. Goodbye. Wow. Yes. Now I'm terrified my sleep paralysis demon is gonna make a comeback. Great job, Bailey. And, hey, how about Barney and Betty? Do we believe them? Seems like there are too many spooky coincidences for that alien abduction to be fake. Nothing wrong with an innocent little conspiracy theory, right? Well, have you guys been watching those congress testimonies about the aliens and all that shit? I'm in my alien era right now, so. They were not lying. They were telling truth. It doesn't matter. Thank you for hanging out with me today. I hope you learned something new. Or maybe you got a little creeped out. But, hey, listen, we have a very exciting episode coming up for you next. Next episode, huh? So every year, I have a Halloween movie night with friends, and they always want to watch the exorcism. Now, I wasn't allowed to watch the exorcism growing up because, you know, demons, okay, but my friends didn't grow up like that. They like demons, so it was like, pure entertainment. And it got me thinking. What is the truth behind real life exorcisms. So I did a little Google search and it turns out that movie caused a mass hysteria in America that we are still experiencing today. And that's not all. Throughout history, there are tons of exorcism accounts that have even atheist historians questioning their beliefs. Is it real? Is it all for show? And is there really an Exorcisms On Demand app? Listen, you weren't prepared for this one. I know I wasn't. So tune in next episode for the Dark History of Exorcisms. By the way, we are dark next week so there will not be a new upload. But we will be back on October October 29th with our Halloween episode. So you better show up. Thank you so much for watching and engaging and commenting. Maybe leave a comment down below because it might be featured and you can join me over on my YouTube where you can watch these episodes on Thursday after the podcast airs. And while you're there, you can also catch my murder mystery and makeup, so don't forget to subscribe. Hello and hey, if you don't know, Dark History is an audioboom original and I'm your host, Bailey Sarian. I hope you have a good day today. You make good choices, be safe out there and I'll be talking to you guys later. Goodbye.