Dark History, Ep. 186: Tales from the Dark History Crypt – A Spooky Season Special
Host: Bailey Sarian
Date: October 15, 2025
Overview
In this Spooky Season Special, Bailey Sarian curates her favorite chilling tales from the Dark History archives, focusing on the supernatural, the bizarre, and the downright horrific. The episode journeys through the history of witches and witch hunts, the roots and fallout of the Satanic Panic, the rise of astrology and psychics, and closes with Rasputin’s almost unbelievable real-life story. Peppered with signature humor and directness, Bailey reminds us that history's darkest moments often spring from panic, prejudice, and a desire to explain the unknown.
“Let’s get weird.” (03:10)
Key Segments & Insights
1. The Witching Hour: Europe’s Dark Obsession with Witches (03:00–55:00)
The Evolution of the Witch
- Ancient origins: The Greek myth of Circe – not always ugly, sometimes “smoking hot” and shrouded in fear of feminine power.
“Circe was sexy. She was hot. Smoking hot. Men just wanted to feel her hot bod when they saw her.” (10:40) - Medieval depiction: Albrecht Dürer’s prints transition witches to “the old hag” stereotype.
“Albrecht would be the man we thank for creating the witch we all know and think of today... he was probably just hurt by some woman. Let’s be honest.” (17:55)
The Start of Witch Hunts
- Helena’s trial: A story of accusation, gaslighting, and the failure to define “witchcraft.”
“Nobody was listening to her. She must have felt like she was going crazy. Everyone’s calling her a witch—she’s pointing the finger back like, ‘I’m not the witch. This guy is the douche.’” (28:50) - Heinrich Kramer’s revenge, the Malleus Maleficarum (“Hammer of Witches”): Laid out how to identify, try, and punish witches—fueling a continental frenzy.
“Is she a woman?... Does she have a mole?... Is she breathing? Witch.” (36:10)“It was just a lose-lose situation... Nobody wins.” (39:25)
Witch Trials Gone Wild: The Zugaramurdi Case
- Spain’s biggest witch hunt: 7,000 accused over panic from stillborns.
“Neighbors are turning on neighbors, family members accusing other family members, fingers be pointing left and right. It was chaos. You can’t trust nobody.” (59:00) - Self-confessions snowball: From self-denunciation to neighbors scapegoating.
- No bloodshed—until the Church interferes, leading to the infamous Logroño trial.
“They said the women weren’t tortured. Okay, guys. Okay.” (1:07:50)
Witch Fever Across Europe
- King James and the Protestant/Catholic rivalry: Witch paranoia as patriarchal and political control—targeting outspoken, poor, and unmarried women.
- Margaret Aitken, the “Great Witch of Scotland,” exposed the flaws and frauds of trials with her bogus “witch-finding” ability.
- Bailey’s summary:
“When in doubt, blame women seems to be the common theme.” (1:31:00)
“If you were alive just a couple hundred years ago…there’s a pretty good chance you might have been accused of witchcraft. I know I would.” (1:33:00)
2. The Satanic Panic & Modern Witch Hunts (1:33:35–2:43:10)
America’s Own Witch Hunt: The Satanic Panic
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The “Michelle Remembers” saga: How one book kicked off a moral panic in the 1980s, using recovered memories and “SRA”—Satanic Ritual Abuse—as the new witchcraft.
“He truly believed she had suffered abuse while in the hands of the Church of Satan…so, of course, people are freaking out.” (1:36:10) -
Religious reactionaries, TV evangelists, and Dungeons & Dragons:
“The media publishes headlines like, ‘Game Cultists Still Missing.’…It was a shitstorm. It’s a circle jerk. It’s just never ending.” (1:56:40)
The McMartin Preschool Case
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False memories, media hysteria, and zero evidence:
“All those terrible things the kids said happened—well, turns out they were just repeating what their parents were telling them to say. Which is so weird. Like, why would you tell your— I don’t understand that.” (2:17:50) -
The “Nocebo” Effect:
“Next time people are panicking about something, maybe take a deep breath, calm down. There you go. You’re welcome.” (2:25:15)
3. Astrology, Psychics, and Spiritualism: The Line Between Belief & Fraud (2:43:30–3:43:00)
Astrology: From Science to Pseudoscience
- Cosmic roots: Sumerians, Babylonians, Greeks—astrology as a tool for survival, navigation, and medicine.
- Nostradamus & Kepler: Astrologers as respected figures, contrasted with persecutions (especially for women).
Spiritualism & Mediums: Rise and Fall
- The Fox Sisters: From fame to self-exposed fraud.
- Debunkers: Harry Houdini versus Arthur Conan Doyle and the war over psychic legitimacy.
“Houdini, though, was like also all about tricks…Houdini, you are so two-faced. You little bitch.” (3:14:25)
Modern America: Psychics on TV, in law enforcement, and the White House
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Ms. Cleo and Sylvia Browne: Pop culture psychics and the lasting public love/hate relationship with the mystical.
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Legitimacy debate:
“If psychics and astrologers are all a bunch of frauds, why are they regularly consulted by law enforcement?... There’s gotta be something there, right?” (3:35:50) -
Final thought:
“Just let people have their peace. If you believe it or not, right? What’s the harm in that, shit? Let people live, goddammit.” (3:45:00)
4. Rasputin: Russia’s Greatest Monster (3:43:00–4:49:00)
Early Life and Mystique
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Peasant to mystic: Claimed visions from the Virgin Mary, “second sight,” and a supposed ability to calm wild animals and predict the future.
“He was apparently able to predict the weather, see wars that were coming, and even foresee the deaths of some people he encountered. Yeah, that’s so raven of him.” (3:51:10) -
Wanderings and cultish practices:
- Involvement with the Klists—a sex-positive, anti-Church sect known for “sinning to drive out sin” rituals finishing with orgies. “It was not your typical youth group. The Clistis would pray for hours, then start dancing, then…orgy. Of course. Duh.” (4:06:22)
Rise to Royal Power
- Befriending the Romanovs: After supposedly saving the hemophiliac heir, Alexei, Rasputin gains the trust and devotion of the royal family, especially Tsarina Alexandra.
- Public suspicion: His influence, sleazy reputation, and rumors of an affair (plus anti-German sentiment towards Alexandra) explode in the run-up to the Russian Revolution.
Death Myths and Legacy
- Assassination attempts:
- Stabbed and (allegedly) disemboweled (but lived)
- Yusupov’s poison, gun, and ultimate murder legend:
“He’s eaten enough poison to kill, like, 20 men…Still standing…This devil who was dying of poison, who had a bullet in his heart, must have been raised from the dead by the powers of evil.” (4:33:30)
- Rasputin’s death and the fall of the Romanovs.
- Tabloid legacy: From penis-worshipping cults to daughter Maria’s circus life and books.
5. Special Spooky Shorts: Conspiracy Theories, Monsters, Nightmares (4:49:30–End)
Urban Legends & Folk Terrors
- Japanese "Cursed Kleenex Commercial" and the viral power of rumor.
Ghosts, Aliens, and Demons
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La Llorona (“The Weeping Woman”)—the Mexican legend:
“The lesson here is don’t have sex with ghosts that you just met. Maybe ask them to see their face first.” (5:03:30) -
Alien abduction: The case of Betty and Barney Hill—America’s prototypical alien encounter and missing time story
Sleep Paralysis: Science and Superstition
- Demonic hallucinations, death by nightmare (Sudden Unexpected Death Syndrome), and cross-cultural similarities.
“Take comfort in knowing…Plenty can come and, like, get you before the sleep demons have a chance. You’re slippery when wet.” (5:33:17) - Bailey shares her own sleep paralysis story for comic/horror relief.
Notable Quotes
- “Fear and paranoia swirling around. Everyone’s on high alert. There may be witches amongst us. You know, trust no one. Search everywhere.” (Witch Trials, 55:00)
- “If you’re being tortured, most likely you’re gonna confess. So this led to many confessions, and this made Margaret look great. They’re like, wow, Margaret, you’re great at this...Well, it didn’t take long until somebody caught on to Margaret.” (On Witch Finder Margaret Aitken, 1:21:00)
- “The media still does this today. It’s easy to pile on someone just because a bunch of people say that they’re bad. It can happen to anyone.” (Contemporary Witch Hunts, 1:33:10)
- “He was just a shock jock, and the people couldn’t get enough...He was said to have a long line of women wanting to be with him. I know. At first I was like, am I looking at the same picture of him?” (On Rasputin’s social ascension, 4:23:00)
- “Lay down, face up. On the examination table. And then he…inserted the needle into her navel. Ouch.” (Betty Hill’s alien abduction hypnosis, 5:22:25)
- “No one knows exactly what causes sleep paralysis. What we do know is that people whose sleep cycles are messed up, jet lag...But there’s like no solid scientific explanation. So we have to turn to the occult.” (Science vs. Superstition, 5:34:40)
Memorable Moments
- Laugh-out-loud tangent about “prickers” for witch hunting: “There were official prickers. People who were officially the prickers. And they would use knives with retractable blades. Isn’t that magic?” (Prickers, 41:30)
- Musings on band warnings and the Satanic Panic: “You just made these bands and record companies even more popular because kids were seeking them out. And Satan wins again. Whoops.” (Parental Advisory labels, 2:23:11)
- Roasting Harry Houdini: “Houdini, though, was like also all about tricks...No, Houdini. No, no, thank you.” (Houdini’s anti-medium tirade, 3:15:00)
- Bailey theorizes on future aliens: “They’re us in the future. They have bigger eyes for all the screens...you don’t need bones, everything’s a little floppy and skinny because we’re not walking anywhere.” (5:10:42)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Introduction & Witchcraft Origins: 03:00–18:00
- Birth of Witch Hunts: 18:00–43:00
- Malleus Maleficarum & Witch-Trying "Logic": 43:00–59:00
- Spanish Witch Trials (Zugaramurdi): 59:00–1:11:00
- European Witch Craze & King James: 1:11:00–1:33:00
- Satanic Panic & McMartin Preschool: 1:36:00–2:26:30
- Astrology/Spiritualism/Houdini: 2:43:30–3:47:00
- Rasputin: 3:47:00–4:49:00
- Urban Legends, Ghosts, Aliens, Sleep Paralysis: 4:49:30–5:38:00
Tone & Style
- Conversational, irreverent, and often blunt.
- Blends education with dark comedy: “If I could say the damn town in Spain...they own their fucked up history as a reminder to the people for it to never happen again.”
- Encourages curiosity and questioning: “Don’t be afraid to ask questions to get the whole story, because you deserve that.” (seen throughout)
Final Takeaways
- Many of history’s spookiest, ugliest episodes stem from collective fear—of women, of difference, of the “other,” or of the unknown.
- Recurring lesson: Mass hysteria can destroy lives—whatever era, whatever scapegoat.
- Even when debunked, folklore, panic, and superstition linger, fueling both nightmares and pop culture.
Bailey’s parting advice:
Stay curious, don’t follow the crowd, and maybe check your closet for witches—just in case.
End of summary
