Episode Overview

Title: The Most Persuasive Sales Tool? You’re Not Using It
Host: Darren Hardy
Date: September 4, 2025

In this episode, Darren Hardy explores a crucial aspect of sales that often goes overlooked: the three foundational Cs of positioning—Confidence, Not Convincing, and Control. He shares actionable insights and memorable anecdotes about how these Cs are essential for persuasive, ethical, and highly effective selling by grounding each in practical examples and energetic storytelling.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Setting the Stage: The Three Cs of Positioning

Darren opens by recapping the previous session (job description for selling: help them decide, make a connection, qualify and sort), then leads into the next core principle: the three Cs for selling success.

2. Confidence: The Most Persuasive Force

Timestamp: 01:00 – 04:03

• Core Idea: The person with the most confidence in a conversation influences the outcome.
  • Quote: “Everything in sales is a game of confidence. Whoever is more confident about their position is the person who will influence the other. Confidence wins every time.” (B, 01:35)
• Clarification: Self-confidence helps, but the real key is confidence in the product/service being sold.
  • Even introverts can sell passionately when they truly believe in something (ex: book, face cream, avocado mayo).
• Integrity Warning:
  • “If you don’t actually authentically believe in what it is that you’re saying and selling, then you are committing spiritual fraud by trying to do so.” (B, 02:20)
  • Darren stresses the importance of genuine belief, suggesting that selling otherwise is unethical.
• Practical Advice:
  • Before selling, remember your initial awe—similar to Monet telling his students to “remember the awe” when painting a flower.
  • “That is the awe you want to bring to your sales conversations—that feeling will transmit and it will influence.” (B, 03:40)

3. Not Convincing: You’re Sorting, Not Selling

Timestamp: 04:04 – 06:20

• Second C Principle:
  • Don’t waste energy trying to convince someone—focus on connecting with those who already have a recognized need or a desire.
  • Quote: “You shouldn’t have to convince anyone of anything. They should already want what you are selling and know that they want it.” (B, 04:35)
• Perception vs. Projection:
  • Identifies the danger of assuming prospects perceive needs as you do (e.g., weight loss products).
  • Notable moment:
    • “Your projection is not always their perception... Your products are actually not for them, no matter what you think.” (B, 05:10)
• Corrects a Sales Myth:
  • “The sales adage of find a need and fill it is wrong. It is find a perceived need, perceived in the mind of the customer, and fill that.” (B, 05:38)
• Practical tip:
  • Your job is to help people discover and then communicate their perceived needs, not create them where they don’t exist.

4. Control: Selling as Consultation

Timestamp: 06:21 – 09:44

• Third C Principle:
  • Selling is not about talking a lot but guiding the process with questions, just like a doctor consults a patient.
  • Quote: “Sales is consultation. It is diagnosing and then prescribing... like a visit to the doctor.” (B, 06:50)
• Sales Malpractice Example:
  • Most sellers jump to prescribe before truly diagnosing—this is sales malpractice.
  • “You go in and see a doctor and she asks what brings you here... She controls the flow of the visit and the conversation by using poignant questions that get to the heart of your pain.” (B, 07:12)
• Memorable Anecdote:
  • Bill McDermott (CEO of SAP) tells his team:
    • “Listen, guys, as we go into this meeting, I want rabbit ears, not alligator mouths. Meaning just shut up, listen to the customer and control the conversation only through attentive questions.” (B, 08:30)
• Summary Reminder:
  • Control doesn’t mean domination, it means guiding with attentive, diagnostic questions and never prescribing before completing diagnosis.

5. Recap and Call to Action

Timestamp: 09:45 – End

• Summary of the Three Cs:
  • Confidence: “Remember your awe and bring that conviction to every sales conversation.” (B, 09:55)
  • Not Convincing: “You are sorting, not convincing. Looking for those who know they have pain, that they want to go away, or a desire that is unfulfilled.” (B, 10:06)
  • Control: “Control the conversation through questions. Your job is to diagnose, never prescribe until you have a full diagnosis.” (B, 10:17)
• Reflection Prompt:
  • Darren finishes by inviting listeners to consider which C they need to improve in.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On ethical selling:
  • “If you don’t actually authentically believe in what it is that you’re saying and selling, then you are committing spiritual fraud by trying to do so.” (B, 02:20)
• On perceived need:
  • “The sales adage of find a need and fill it is wrong. It is find a perceived need, perceived in the mind of the customer, and fill that.” (B, 05:38)
• Memorable sales advice from Bill McDermott:
  • “I want rabbit ears, not alligator mouths.” (B, 08:30)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:00 — The power of confidence in sales
• 02:20 — Authenticity and “spiritual fraud”
• 03:40 — The Monet “remember the awe” analogy
• 04:35 — Stop convincing, start sorting
• 05:38 — Myth-busting “find a need and fill it”
• 06:50 — Selling as diagnosis, not prescription
• 08:30 — “Rabbit ears, not alligator mouths” anecdote
• 09:55 — Recap of the three Cs and call to reflect

Final Thoughts

Darren Hardy’s episode delivers a clear, energizing guide to the three Cs at the heart of genuine, effective selling: Confidence, Not Convincing, and Control. His stories, analogies, and practical tips—like remembering your own “awe” and approaching sales like a diagnostic consultation—equip listeners to transform their approach, focusing on belief, integrity, and attentive listening, rather than high-pressure tactics.