← De-Influenced with Dani + Jordan
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Foreign. The following podcast is a dear media production. Hello and welcome back to your favorite podcast, D Influenced. I'm back. I'm solo again. Jordan is super busy these days, so it's all up to mama to carry the podcast. Oh, also, our toilet that is next door is making the weirdest noise. I've never heard a toilet make this noise. It kind of sounds like a clown is laughing, which is like every child's nightmare when it comes to toilets. Like, I was always so scared of flushing the toilet when I was a kid, I literally could not do it. And that sound, I really hope it gets fixed before my kids hear it because it's. It's actually like freaky. So if you hear any laughing toilets in the background, that's what it is. So, yeah, I am curious if y' all are liking these solo episodes. I. I bet it's like 50, 50. I bet 50% are like, yeah, yeah, we love it. And 50% are like, I miss Jordan. I miss Jordan too. Hopefully he'll be back soon. You know, it's just that Q3, Q4. Things just get so busy and hectic. But hopefully we'll have back soon. Little catch up. What's been new with y'? All? The world's crazy. Hey, what's new? I had a great weekend though. Went to dinner with Jordan and Joel, my father in law, because Jordan's mom was out of town, like on a church retreat. And so we did dinner on Friday. We went to a restaurant called Sevies. And it's kind of like a classic, like, iconic place in Dallas. And I had never been there, so, yeah, it was a great night. We had a babysitter, which was nice. Saturday morning, we kind of figured out this like, new hack in life, especially when we. When we don't go to the lake house. So we wake up like our normal hour, which is, you know, like 6:15 with the kids. So we kind of found out this like, new hack in life. We wake up like our normal hour and then we take the kids to breakfast like super early. And we realized that you can get in anywhere that you want to go. Like into the best restaurants if you show up at 7:50. Like, hands down, there is no line. So we have just been like, bopping around each weekend to like, some of our favorite breakfast places, places that we never go to because they're so crowded. So last this past weekend, we went to Snooze. It was a good time. We got there at a 7:40 and then we did the Pearl Museum, which is a Museum in Dallas that. I mean, they have it all, but mainly we went for the dinosaurs. I will say that was one of those days that I got home. My dad came with us to the Peru museum. I got home and I was like, I'm beat. So I took a three hour nap. I haven't napped since I got on my new medication. But that day we needed a nap. Then we watched Texas football. You know, our boy Manning is doing a lot better. Our quarterback, he was. I don't know, I think there's a lot of pressure on him if you think about it. Okay, think about it. You're like 20 years old. I don't even know if he's 20. And you have all these, like, old men that are. That are watching you, that, like, you dictate their mood for the rest of the day, whether you win or lose or if you're good or bad. I mean, it's a lot of pressure. And Texas football has a lot of money. So I just feel for these. Like, they're like little boys. Like, it's just. It's a lot of pressure. We made a pizza that night. We got the pizza from Whole Foods. It was like, I don't know, it's pretty doughy, but I still liked it. That's one thing about pizzas. Like, you really can't mess it up. As long as it's, like, warm and hot and not, like, still frozen in the middle. Even then, it honestly would be pretty good. Um, so that was a. That was our weekend. Nothing too crazy. I did actually have something crazy happen. Um, so I guess, like, over the past week with just everything going on in the world, I've been a little bit more, like, out of my dms. Like, I get in there, like, every so often, but I'm also like, hey, I gotta protect my mother. I mean, y' all get it. It's like if you're. If you gotta show up as a wife or a mom, you, like, can't be too much on your phone. Like, reading DMS and reading the news. What's going on? So. So I got this DM from someone and she was apologizing for, like, some post that she made about me. And I don't even know, like, what the post said, but she went into, like, this big apology and she was like, I'm so sorry that I. I did this to you. And I can't imagine the backlash. And I was like, girl, I appreciate this policy. I have no idea what you're talking about. I was like, I was Checked out for like two or three days. And so I appreciate it, but I was like, don't worry about it because I literally have no idea what. What you said and what was going on. Which is crazy. That, yeah, like, I have that self discipline because usually in the past I would know every single little thing that everybody was saying about me. Here's another example. There's a girl on Tick Tock right now. And I only know this because I was looking on Tick Tock to, like, sometimes I use Tick Tock as like, research of, like, what's going on in the world. And like, what's everybody talking about? Internet culture. And there's a girl getting, like, blasted. Her name is Megan Farina and she like, made a. She's getting blasted, like, and she had to come out with like an apology video because she made like a dancing video when Charlie Kirk died. Like, not cool, whatever. So, like, I just see her like all over my feed and I'm like, you know what's going on? So I click on our profile and the first thing I see is a video about me. And I was like, what? I was like, what do I have to do with this? And so she made a video. Literally, I click on it. It's like, I can't believe you guys are listening to this dumb ass influence. And like, goes. I mean, the whole video was about me. And I was like, I was just getting on here to look up, you know, like, research from my podcast. I was like, this is why I going to put my phone away and not be on there too much. Because that's the worst is like, whenever you're just like, trying to see, like, what's going on, guys, like, hey, how's the party? And then like, you scroll to a video that's like, just all about you, and you're like, I really didn't need to see that today. But yeah, she posted it like a long time ago about like, my Tylenol video where I didn't give anybody medical advice. But whatever that was, that was a Internet culture, man. I mean, it's rough out here. It's rough out here. The. The best thing you can probably do is just take a little break. But it's so sad because I love it too, you know, it's such a love hate. Like, I would say I love it more than I hate it, for sure. Otherwise I probably wouldn't be doing this. But in like 99% of my interactions are always so positive. But y' all know how it is. You read the one and you're just like, ugh. It's like, he just sticks with you for the rest of the day. You have to, like, wash it off and just, like, start over fresh. So. So, yeah, you know, that happened. Which I'm good now. I got. I got really happy because I'm really not like, a super big fan of coffee still, even though it's not, like, with 17 weeks pregnant. Like, I'm not, like, nauseous, and I don't have this, like, huge aversion to it, but I. It's just. I don't prefer it. And I saw her liquid IV sent me a PR package, and they just came out with a. A liquid IV packet that's sugar free. And also. So it has, like, all of the electrolytes and everything, but it also has caffeine, like, natural caffeine. I was like, oh, this is what I want. And it's a strawberry kiwi flavor, and it's, like, so good. And so that's what I've been sipping over here. So, you know, all you just need is a good drink to just kind of, like, cheer you up a little bit. I am 17 weeks pregnant, which is so. I think I am. It's so funny. I. My friends keep asking me what. How far along I am, and I tend to not track it until I get into, like, the 20s, like, mid-20s. Because like, otherwise it's, like, so overwhelming because I feel like I have so much more to go that I'm just, like. I get kind of anxious about it. I'm like, oh, my gosh. Like this. I'm only, like, a third way or whatever. So I think I'm 17 weeks. I'm either 17 or, like, 16. I know I'm not 15. I could be 18, but I don't know. I also, somebody asked me the other day, what's my due date? And I was like, March 9th. And I was like, wait a minute. Or is it March 4th? I couldn't remember. But I think it is March 4th, I think, because, yeah, like I said, I'm kind of one of those people. Like, I told you guys this before growing up, I'd never looked at my report card. Like, I literally would just hand it to my parents and, like, get it signed. Because I was like, I'm doing everything I can do. I cannot do better. Like, there is no possible way that the grade could be higher than what you're about to see, so why does it matter? So I just wouldn't look at it because I was like, I'm giving it my all. That's kind of how I feel about this pregnancy. I'm giving it my all. So what? Why does it matter what week? But I did look up 17 weeks and baby is 5 inches. Let's see, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Like this big size of a pomegranate, which is so crazy. I read that the baby can hear me. Like, it can get startled, like, when I. Let me yell, sorry, everybody probably just jumped a little bit. I could scare you too. So baby can hear me. Baby is developing fingernails and fingerprints still working. Still working on all those organs. The brain, the lungs, all the good stuff. And so that's just so crazy. Like, it's, it always just blows my mind. Another friend of mine is pregnant, and she sent me her sauna or, like, the video. And her little. I don't know what they call it. Not a fetus, because it was like, a baby. Like, you know, I think she's, like, probably nine weeks, and her little babe was, like, literally doing, like, flips. It's just so crazy that. And hers is probably, like, an inch long. And you see it, like, literally, like, rule. I was like, you're baby. We don't know if it's a boy. Girl is gonna be crazy. Like, I've never seen a baby move like that in the womb. It's just wild. But I did. Oh, yesterday was Charlie Kirk's memorial. I, I, I'm not gonna lie. I, I don't think I cried that hard in quite some time. I mean, it was long. I watched it, like, so it went live, and then I watched it, like, probably an hour or two after, so I was, like, able to fast forward. But I really liked a lot of the praise and worship. It was so good. It was so crazy to see, like, that whole stadium. I don't know, but to see that whole stadium, like, praise and worship, it was wild. And then, okay, not to mention, when Erica Kirk forgives the man that shot her husband in the neck, like, the father of her children, and she says, like, she forgives. It was just the craziest example of the gospel just saying, like, hey, we're all sinners and we all fall short. Even this man that killed my husband publicly is like, you know, it's just wild. So I was just, I mean, she's just amazing. She is. Has some strength to be able to sit up there. I was thinking, I was like, I really don't think I could have done that. I really don't. Like, and, and she did. So it was really cool. I think it's really crazy how, like, when you go through grief or you go through something like, so hard, it's so evident how, like, the only way you get through it is because God shows up or you, like, allow him to show up. And, like, there's just no way. I, like, I don't. I can't fathom it that I could stand in front of that many people after losing my husband, like, six days ago. I. I'm like, I would. I wouldn't be able to speak. I would be bawling so much. All these people honoring my husband. And she got up there, was able to speak. I mean, it's just crazy. So, yeah, I did that. You know, I went to bed with, like, swollen eyes. I woke up this morning. You know, when you cry before, I was like, what happened? Yeah, I'm definitely in my tired mom era. Maybe because we're pregnant. We're. I mean, I'm pregnant. You know, it's basically both of us, me and Jordan. But I am really starting to feel it. Like, it's really starting to wear on me. Like these early mornings where I was like, when's the last time we've been able to just like, sleep. Sleep in and like, like, you can't. Like, you literally can't because your baby is crying in the crib. And that's just like, literally the worst sound ever because you don't want your baby to be crying, so you immediately pop up. But, I mean, it's so worth it. Don't get me wrong. It's just like one of the cons of life right now. It's just like, oh, I just wanted, like, wanna. I just wanted to sleep to like 10:00am like, oh, my gosh, I. I can't even imagine, like, what that would be like. I'd wake up and half my day would be over. Like, it's so crazy, you know? But, yeah, so, you know, overall, a lot to be thankful for. Lots of good stuff going on. But yeah, I wrote down. I got. I have some stories for you guys. I know this format's a little different now that I'm. I'm going solo, so I really just tried to, like, find some interesting stories that, like, I've found interesting that I want to talk about with you guys. Most of them I just find through. Sometimes I ask Chachi bt, but honestly, Chad's not great at it. I'll be like, what should I talk about? Podcast? And they'll be like, talk about a work life balance. And I'm like, okay. Like, we've done that, you know, and so I kind of have to, like, go off on my own and just finally, you know, scour the Internet. So I want us. It's so random, but it's actually been, like, super relevant to me because. So we live near a golf course that is like, just probably a mile and a half, like, down the road, maybe not even that far. And I play tennis with a bunch of moms. I've told you guys at this country club, and lately they're redrained the entire course, and there's been a lot of protesters, like, outside of this. Our. Our golf course. And I'll be honest. Like, do you ever see protesters and you're like, I don't know what you're protesting? I saw some yesterday, and they seem to be protesting out, outside of our church. But everything they were saying, I agreed with. They're like, love, not hate. And I was like, same like, you know, I was like, I think we're on the same side. But yeah, so I. I didn't know what these people were protesting at the golf course. So I. Maybe this has something to do with it. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe y' all can help me understand why people are put. But I think they're upset that they're redoing the golf course, but I don't know why. But. So then I saw this, like, study that I found online, and it's like, kind of crazy because we live really close to this golf course, so. And I don't know if any of you guys, like your husband spent a lot of time on golf courses or you live near one. So there was a case or a study that came out, a case controlled study in Minnesota and in western Wisconsin. And they looked at people from 1991 to 2015, and they listed people diagnosed with Parkinson's versus other similar controls. So they found that people who lived within a mile of golf courses had 126% chance higher odds of developing Parkinson's compared to people that lived six miles away from a golf course. Also, this is crazy. Households that got water from municipal water systems with golf courses in their service area had double the risk compared to those that didn't, which is like, wild. Like, that's. So it's kind of like one of those studies where it's like, once again, we're looking at correlation, not causation, but, like, those are pretty strong correlations. You know, the only other correlation I could think of is people that live closer to a golf cart golf course are. Have way more money. Like so maybe they're indulging in something that most people don't, and it gives them Parkinson's, but I don't know what that would be. So I feel like it's probably the golf course. So this was, like, once again, it was an observational study that just shows correlations. So then it goes on to say, what is so toxic in all of these golf courses? So it's called glyphosate. It's an herbicide or a weed killer. It kills weeds while leaving genetically modified crops unharmed. So genetically modified is like, when they go in and they modify our fruits and vegetables so that it can, like, withstand our. Basically, a poison. And so really, when you're eating an apple, like, are you really eating an apple? Like, that is the question, you know? And so it was the craziest part. This is another one that's, like, super. Okay. It's like you have all these correlations. At what point does this just become like, it is what it is? Glyphosate was patented. Patented. Wow. It's a hard word. In 1974, before then, autoimmune and digestive disorders were rare. Today, we all have gut issues. Glyphosate destroys beneficial gut bacteria, disrupts metabolism. Metabolism weakens immunity. But people blame gluten, not the poison sprayed on our food, which is, like, so wild because, like, I talked to my mom, and she's like, danny, like, growing up, like, nobody had gluten intolerance. Like, nobody had celiac disease. Like, nobody had all of these allergies and all this. These crazy whatevers. So, yeah, it's definitely got to be some external factors, some things that we're just adding to our foods and our bodies that we weren't. But it says, since 1974, since it was patented. I can't say that word. Patented. Celiac disease increased five fold, Crohn's disease increased sevenfold, and gluten intolerance increased 19 fold. That's crazy. So, yeah, I see a lot of correlation. I also was like, okay, great. We live next to a golf course, so that's nice. But basically, I guess this. The bottom line is, like, eat organic. Oh. And it said that. What was interesting, it said to wash. If you have inorganic fruits and vegetables, wash them in baking soda and apple cider vinegar. Which I was like, that's a good life tip. It's. It's not too expensive. And then also, like, take your probiotics. But I'm like, ugh, we can only do so much. It's like. But it's like poison, you know, so maybe that's why people were protesting and they were upset. I do feel like it's just kind of crazy because, like, if all these things are true, I feel like when we, like, I don't know, move into a neighborhood, like, we should have, like, a warning that we're, like, moving into an area with carcinogens, you know, because, like, glyphosate is the carcinogen. Like, it's proven to be a cancer causing, like, herbicide or whatever. So it's like, shouldn't we know these things? Or, like, even when we play golf? You know, if you play golf, you're probably not. You're not there. I mean, I don't know. You're kind of there all day. Some people are there literally all day. But I just feel like we should know. So here I am telling you, I don't. I don't know. I just read these studies, and I just tell y' all what I read, so. But I did find that, like, really interesting. And I'm curious what your thoughts on what your thoughts are on all of this. And it's so crazy that it, like, linked to Parkinson's, like, specifically. 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And I always try to go like watch one video from one perspective and then I go watch the debate from the other perspective. So like when I watch one video I'm like, oh, I totally agree with that, like, that's exactly what I feel. And then I go watch another one. I'm like, oh, I don't know. But they had a different perspective and it's actually really good. So there's a lot of things in the world right now that I'm like, I don't know how I feel about. So that's kind of like my rabbit hole. So to go from that and then be like, oh, Glenn Powell was seen with. Who was he seen with? He was just seen with some girl. Olivia Jade. Yes. So to go from that and then be like, see, like, oh, Glen Powell was just spotted with Olivia Jade at a restaurant. I mean, that used to really get my gears going, but it's just not hitting the same way. It's just not hitting like it used to do. So now I'm actually researching population decline in the usa, which I think is so crazy. Like, so, like, these are things that I just would have never ever thought about. And I never would have thought that like a population like the, how many people live in the United States would like actually affect us that much. But obviously it does. But, you know, my mind has just never really gone there and now my mind is going there. So I was looking at a article from npr. There's this new research from the United nations that found that the number of children born to the average woman worldwide is the lowest it's ever been. Which. Okay, this is kind of crazy. Like, I don't know if I believe this. It said in 1960, like, the average number was five kids. I don't know if I believe that. Yeah, you can look that up. Maybe. Fact check. It was an NPR article that I was reading. And now the average is okay, but this is worldwide. So we do have to remember that worldwide. Wait, that's a lot of kids, though. Like, I don't know. I don't know about that one. And now the average is 2.2 kids. What's so crazy is the population decline. It's mainly affecting high income countries. That's where the birth rate is plummeting. But you would think that low income countries would be the ones that have, that are plummeting. The only way I can think about this is when I went to Zanzibar, which is like in Tanzania or an island off the coast of Tanzania. I went there for a month and I was working at like a children's camp and everybody spoke Swahili. So like, I don't even really know like, what I was doing there, but I felt like God was like, you should go to Africa. And I was like, okay. And I was. I was a freshman in college. And anyway, so. But all I will say is, out of all the places I've ever been in the world, like New York, London, New York, like, that village that I stayed in, I've never met happier people in my life, you know, and they don't have shoes. They didn't have anything. They ate the same thing every single meal, literally. Like, I worked in the kitchen, and the cook would just, like, cut off a chicken's head, like, right in front of me, like, while the k. The chicken was alive. Like, it. Like, you know, they cook on the ground, literally. And they're the happiest, most joyful people I've ever been around in my life. And so I don't know. That probably has something to do with it. I feel like when you're happy and joyful, you just, like, want to have more kids. And you're probably not taking, like, you're not so stressed out about all the things that we are so stressed out about here in America or all over the world. So. But I was thinking about this, and I was like, why is the population declining? Like, why are people having less children? And so I looked into it, looked at some, like, I don't know, articles online, and it said that mainly it's like, a social norm now that women are deciding against motherhood, and they're deciding to invest more in their careers, more into their, like, experiences. And which I think that makes a lot of sense with just, like, how. I don't know, I feel like how we were raised, because a lot of us probably felt like we had to fall into this, like, so this social norm of, like, you know, get married, have a lot of kids, and then your husband is just gonna, like, you know, take care of you. And I think a lot of us got really turned off by that idea at a very young age. And. And so we wanted to, like, rebel. And this was our version of rebelling, was like, no, I'm not going to do that. Actually. I'm going to live, like, the best life ever, and I'm going to not ever have children, and I'm going to become, like, the CEO of my own company and do all these things. And so we just had so many goals that were outside of family. And when you add family into, like, the trajectory of our goals, it just doesn't really fit, honestly. And to be honest, it didn't really fit with my goals, and that's why I blew up my life last Year because I was trying to do both. Like, I was trying to be, you know, word like the girl boss and continue to grow my business and grow my personal brand and just keep on going, going. But then I also wanted to have kids and like, it was literally impossible. I crashed and burned. And so I think a lot of us are being faced with like, oh wait. Like it's like a decision that we have to make and it has to be like an intentional. Like we have to. And it has to be a decision that we like discuss when we get married because, you know, it's like, does your husband also want the same things? And he's. He like it, it takes a lot to be pregnant. Like, you need a lot of support. Like, you need a man that is going to understand that you're going to be hormonal and they have to be steady. Like, they have to be the ones that are like gonna be steady and love you no matter what and not take too much offense to all the hormones. Like, I literally, like Jordan would come and sit next to me when I was first trimester. I'd be like, you smell like dog poop. Like, I like, I love you and like, but you smell like dog poop. Like, I need you to get away, you know, and it wasn't personal. Like, I just, that's just what was going on. And like, you need a husband that's like, hey, I love her no matter what. And I know that she's just being hormonal and that's a lot, like, it's a lot for a guy to commit on to that on the front end. So. But you kind of need to. Otherwise having children is going to be hard if you're with a partner that's like, hey, I got my own thing going on and I can't really be there for you during all these really hard, tumultuous times. And so it is something that I feel like like needs to be talked about more. Especially like with like young 20 year olds. Like your life is gonna look different when you have kids, like no matter what. Like, and, and you have to like prepare for it and like build these, like this, like these muscles of like giving people grace and really taking accountability for your own actions and all these things that if you can't learn to do before you have kids, it's gonna be hard. Like that's. I think what leads to divorce is people are just not ready for, ready for it. But it's the most rewarding, best thing ever. But yeah, just like, not really talked About a lot. So I think women are deciding to, you know, they choose themselves. Some. I just thought about, like, Belly and Conrad and Jeremiah. It's like Belly, like, she chooses herself. Like, and I think a lot of women are choosing themselves. And, you know, I. I can't blame them. I can't blame them because of probably, like, the way that they were encouraged and they were raised in the ways that they felt. Like, maybe not good enough or whatever it is. But I'm here to say if I found a lot more fulfillment in my life, like, just really leaning into, like, motherhood and just like, really going for it and letting go of like, the. All of those, you know, aspirations for a little bit, which I know that I can pursue, you know, at the same time. Maybe not as hardcore, but I know that I can pursue them one day. And I don't know, I feel like having kids, like, has. Has like, fulfilled this, like, instinct of mine. And I know that's not for everyone, but that's what my story was like, because, like, you're not gonna believe me because I'm gonna have four kids. But, like, I was the girl when I married Jordan. I was like, I'm not having kids till, like, I'm way over 30. Like, I want to experience life. I want to travel. Like, I. I don't. I. I told him. I was like, I don't really like kids. And I really didn't. I really didn't. I never was one to babysit. Like, if somebody needed a baby, I don't care how much you're paying. I was like, I'd rather not. Like, I just. I'd rather sell bracelets online, on Facebook or something. Like. And, you know, it's just so crazy how like, God did kind of change my heart over time. But, you know, it makes. It makes sense. You can't get mad at these people that are like, are making these decisions. But maybe you're one of those. And I'm here to tell you it's really awesome, like, being a mom. I know I just complained about waking up at 6:30, but it, like, it's so worth it because, like, every day it's like the feeling. I always say, like, you know. You know that feeling, like, when you're first dating and like, a boy texts you and you're like, so excited, like, your heart races. Like, you literally get this like, anxiety in your heart because you're like, oh, my gosh, he likes me and he asked me a date. And like, it's like you get that feeling every Single day, like when your kids are like, mommy, like I get that heart rate and I mean it's just like so crazy. So anyway, so I think that's probably one of the reasons it says half of us women now reach age 30 without having at least one child. In the 2000s, only 1/3 didn't have a child by 30. So just people are having like children later on after 30. Another reason I would assume is it's really expensive to have a child in child care. You know, buying a home is like so hard, hard right now. You know, having child care, that's really challenging. There's a lot about parenting, even all the baby gear that, you know, you don't really need, you really don't need it all. But dang, does it help a lot? I'm not going to lie, it helps a lot to have all those baby gear and all that stuff and to have a nanny that you can call and like it's not, that's not feasible, that's not realistic for everyone. And so that part does kind of bum me out because I agree, like it is so hard to buy a home right now and to get ahead and then you have like all the student debt or whatever it is and it's like you just can't, you can't feel comfortable enough just how you are. So why would you add a child to the picture? Like I understand that, but I also understand that like it's so crazy all like now that I've had kids, I'll just tell you, not that they don't need much because they obviously need a lot of. But. And I know this is so cliche, but like the craziest things like excite a. A child. It's like all the expensive toys that you buy for them, like those AI toys that speak back to you that Jordan bought for them that he was like on a wait list for, for years. They don't touch em. But then like you go to the lake and like they wanna play with all the spoons in the cabinet and like build a tower. Like you're like, you know, it's like the simplest things like really excite them. And I'm like, so honestly, with this fourth child, I'm not even doing a nursery. They're gonna sleep like in the hallway outside of our bed. Like I. Because that's really all they need. They really don't need too much to start out with. And I know like you want to have the picture perfect, like nursery and everything. Trust me, I did too. But I'm just saying if that is, like, really on your heart, like, it's. They don't really need all those things. But, yes, they need a lot of diapers. Diapers are expensive. They need food and formula or breast milk, and those are all very expensive. So it's hard. And I think that's probably one of the reasons why people don't feel financially secure. So they're scared to have kids. And I totally, like, empathize with that. Let's see. Education also. I feel like this was my own personal opinion, but I feel like education fails us. Like, I don't feel like. And I don't know because I went to school so long ago, so maybe it's different now, but I don't think so. But sometimes I feel like education kind of fails us and we are not set up in, like, the right way when we graduate to get, like, the right type of job, so then we don't get married by the time that we were intended to because it takes us longer to get it, like, on our feet and to be independent. And I have so many friends that, like, their kids are moving back in, like, after going to college because they can't get a job. And maybe, maybe there's something I don't know about with Gen Z, and maybe they're just, like, really picky and they don't want to have a job. That's also a possibility. I don't know. But it does seem, like, more challenging. And sometimes I feel like education doesn't, like, it's not totally caught up with, like, the times and what, you know, the society or, like, economy really needs. And so I think that just kind of like, pushes our timelines back because, you know, you don't want to get married before you have, like, a career. You can. You. Obviously you can. Like me and Jordan. I mean, I was blogging when we got married, but. But, yeah, like, a lot of people want to feel that security and they want to find that, like, who they are independently before they go, like, rely on somebody else. And so. So, yeah, I feel like education even, like, kind of plays a little bit into it. And then. Oh, and then I just think that men have too many options when it comes to dating. Like, honestly, like I said, I am just so thankful that we didn't have all the apps because, like, that one time that I went to a bar and then threw a peanut butter jelly at Jordan's face, like, he probably, like, if we would have had the apps, he probably would have gotten on it that night and be like, next. But we didn't have it, so he was like, I have to stick with her crazy. And here we are, married with three children, fourth on the way. So now there's just so many options. So it's like if you have a hiccup in your relationship or somebody gives you the ick, or like you don't like something, it's like, on to the next one. The options are endless. Let's just keep going and going and going. But then I think what you figure out is like, there's not a perfect person and everybody's gonna have like at least one ick. Like, he probably has icks with me too. Like, I never flush the toilet when I go pee. Like, you know, and so there's icks and things that we're not gonna always like. And that's part of like, the relationship is like loving each other through it and working through it, and then that's whenever you love each other so much more because you did work through all these things. And so. But yeah, I just feel like I have a lot of friends that desire to have a family. Like, a lot of female friends that want to get married and they want to find someone and they. It's so hard for them to date because the guys are so picky. And this actually, like, I just thought about this. So there's this account on Instagram and Tick Tock and I'm obsessed with her. Her account is called Elle's Beats and y' all should go follow her. But she. There's this like really popular running trail in Dallas that like all the young people like run and, and bike and they have like a couple of like restaurants where people will just like sit out there and drink and have. So it's like very young, youthful. Her Instagram is called Elle's Beats on the Streets. And she calls herself a dating journalist. Real talk, hot takes and then hashtag sober courage. So she has these conversations with men that are running on the trail and she's like, what makes you want to approach a female? Like, what are you looking for in a date? Or like, when's the last time you asked a girl on a date? And you just kind of get into like the guys minds these days and like, and the whole thing that she's trying to encourage is for people to meet in person again and to like, it's. Take it more traditional and not just be on the apps all the time. And. But it's so interesting because then she's also doing this and then you're like, Scrolling. And you see somebody that's single, and then you can, like, DM them and, like, date them or whatever. Like, I think it's great. I think it's great. She's kind of like a little matchmaker, but y' all just have to follow her because it's also, like, really interesting to see, like, what single people are looking for these days. Like, one guy was asked, and she was like, what is, like, your one thing that you're looking for in a woman? And he was like. And he was, like, dead serious. He's like, probably, like, a really strong jawline, like, chisel jawline. And, like, all the girls are like, roll my eyes. Like, really? Really? You couldn't come up with, like, a better, like, more, like, heartfelt felt answer. So, anyway, yeah, I just. I feel like dating has just gotten out of hand, and it's just so hard. A lot of women want families, and they want to settle down and get married, but it's harder. Also, this one's kind of like, you know, a little touchy subject, but it's just the truth. It was saying that abortions are, like, a huge factor in. The CDC said that abortions are a huge factor in the population decline. So I looked up, like, I was like, okay, how many abortions are we talking about? Like, I don't even know. So it said, In 2020, there were 620,000 abortions. 2024, 6250-0020-2260-9000. And then 2023, 1 million abortions. 2024. 1.14 abortion. One point. Sorry, 1.14 million abortions last year. So I added all those up in the last four years. That means 4.3 million babies died. And so that's a lot of people. That's a lot of Americans, if you think about it. I feel like it would have changed the population, like, massively. So, I mean, that's another huge, huge factor that's going on. And then also fertility decline. Fertility is, like, obviously a huge issue. And what's so frustrating about infertility is that there's so many. Like, people don't know why, but it's definitely something. I asked my OB last time I was in there. I was like, do you feel. I asked her, how long have you been practicing? She was like, 30 years, almost 30 years. And I said, do you feel like infertility is like, when you first started practicing versus now? Like. And I wasn't asking for, like, a study or whatever. I was just asking for her personal opinion with her Her. I mean, she delivers, like, I don't know, like five to ten babies a week. Like, she does. She knows what's up. And I was like, do you feel like infertility has increased? And she was like, oh, my gosh, Danny. Like, it's. She's like, I never used to deal with infertility, and now it's like, it's like everyone. And I asked her, I was like, what do you think it is? And she was like, I really think it's external factors. It's like our food and our air and all the things. And, you know, she didn't say a specific one. I wanted to. I. I wanted her to, but she didn't. I kept digging. I was like, like, what kind of external factors are we talking about? I mean, honestly, probably like the pesticides I was reading about earlier that they're putting all over our foods, genetically modifying our foods, like, that's probably a thing. If it's causing Parkinson's, it's probably causing other things. You know what I mean? But, yeah, fertility decline is, like, huge. And then the COVID after effects. I think Covid is still the after effects of, like, mental health. And how that has affected our mental health is, like, really, really scary. And I don't think that people have been able to, like, get back on their feet just yet. They might start getting back on their feet, but it's hard to recover after like, a year of like, such like, mental kind of torment or like, just throwing off your life so much. I think about, like, the kids that graduated during COVID and they didn't have, like, you know, their graduation or they didn't. They weren't able to go to school and classes. And like, that's like, such a formative, like, year of your life. I mean, we're all kids. It's so crazy. And so I think that that's still, like, people are still, like, a little fearful there. And I don't know, I guess what, what I was saying in this article, what's so scary about the population decline is that, you know, like, we're just not going to have, like, the workforce or the infrastructure to, like, support our economy. And. And it's going to be like, it's going to be wild. Like, it's going to be. It's going to be bad is basically what they're saying. But, yeah, I don't know. I think all of those things are just interesting to think about. I think that's why, like, me personally, I kind of wish I would have started having Kids sooner. I kind of was like, what was I doing with my life? And I feel like if you start having kids sooner, then you're not as old as a mom. Like, so then when your kids go off to college, like, you kind of do, you can do all the things that you wanted to do, you know, like, you could still do them, but, like, you also could bring your kids, or your kids are kind of off, like, living their own life. And so it's not like I remember people to say. Honestly, I think my parents used to say this. I feel. Maybe not say this exactly, but, like, insinuate. Like, when you're. When you. When you have kids, like, your life changes. Like, and it was, like, negative. It was like, your life changes, like, for. And it does, like, don't get me wrong. But it's, like, been such a good change that I was like, what was I doing before? And honestly, like, have kids when you're young because it's tiring. Like, I'm so tired all the time. And so, like, I think people should have kids in their 20s when they're, like, so, I don't know, like, resilient and, like, have so much energy. And, you know, you can change, like, 18 diapers a day. I don't know. It just makes so much more sense to me. And then, like, when you're older and your kids are in college and you're still in your 40s, like, go live life, like, YOLO and, like, do all the things that you ever. You always want to do. Plus, you'll probably have more money that you saved up and actually be able to afford the things that you want to do. So I don't know. That's just kind of my take on it. So this one's interesting. Have y' all heard of the term bedrot? I know I have. I love bedrotting. I just love to get in my bed and just, like, be in my pajamas, no makeup on, eating Cheetos in my bed, watching the Summer I turned pretty and just no worries in the world, which is really. Never happens. But when it does, oh, like, mom's going hard. I'm going hard with that rot. So. But this is what's so crazy. I saw this article, and I actually saved it a long time ago, like, months ago. And I thought it was kind of relevant to the population decline that I wanted to read about. The Wall Street Journal reported on the sex recession. They said it's worse now than it was during COVID Ifs. Whoever that is analyzed data on sex and Intimacy. In the latest General Social Security produced by norc, whoever that is. At the University of Chicago, they found 37% of people 18 to 64 reported having sex at least one time a week, down from 55% in 1990. 24 of 18 to 29 year olds had not had sex in the past year, which that number doubled since 2020. 2010. Sorry. Also, if you're 18, you don't need to be having sex. Okay. Like, just, you're too young. What is it? No dating till after you're married. That's what my dad used to say. So this kind of like related to the other the population decline. Because obviously we all know how babies are made. But the question is why? Why is this happening? The article didn't actually have any reasons why, so I had to like kind of come up with my own. And I would love to know yalls feedback, like, why you think that this is happening. So none of this has any like, like evidence behind it. But this is just why I think that sex is declining these days. Pornography. I think pornography is like a huge factor in it. And just like the access to it I think is really harmful because you can like literally get it anywhere. And then now with only fans, all of this, it's like, why have a girlfriend when you can have money on your app and online? I guess I think that this is happening because obviously of declining marriage rates. Like that makes sense. It. There was a study in there that said like, married people have the most sex. Which makes sense. Yeah. So guys, if you want to have sex, get married. And then obviously people are addicted to screens. They called this in the article. They talked about it as bedrotting. And now people are kind of getting like their dopamine hits from their screens and it's just disconnecting people and they're like, you know, think about it, think about it. Back in the 90s or the 80s, like you get in bed and you got nothing else to do. It's like, okay, we might as well like, you know, you're just like. And now there's so many options, like so many apps that you can get on. Like, I don't know about you, but when I'm watching a show, like I'm straight up on Wikipedia, I want to know everything about the time period of the show. I want to know everything about every single actor in it who's married to who, and I'm just like scrolling for hours. I love to learn on my phone. I love to use ChatGPT to ask like, you Know, questions about history or whatever. So there's so much for me to do on my phone. But it distracts us, like, from our intimacy with, you know, our husbands. And then I think a big part of it is I think a lot of people have moved away from, like, traditional values, like Christian morals and Christian values. So I think that that's like, also causing them to, like, not get married, like, not find someone to be intimate with, try to fill that gap with like, something else. And traditional Christian values, like, encourage you to, like, fall in love with someone, don't have sex until your marriage, then find that intimacy, like, once you're married. And it's like such a progression in a relationship and it' like when you fall in in love with someone and you respect them and you love their character, then you're going to want to do it more. You know what I mean? So I think people are like, finding their dopamine rushes, like, elsewhere. And then I think this, like, normalization of like, just focusing so much on, like, self. Like, sometimes I feel like, self care, which I like, am so into self care because, like, you really do have to take care of yourself as such, especially as a mom. But, like, it sometimes it, like, I don't know, it's too much, like, it's a little bit too much about self. And it's like, what are you doing for someone else? And like, what are you doing to serve your spouse? Or what are you doing to like, you know what I mean, to create that intimacy in a relationship? And I think when people are focused so much on their self, on themselves, like, once again, like, you have all these people like, that are just like, so worried about sharing their lives online or pictures of themselves online and like, you know, like, guilty as charged. Like, and. And they're not, you know, they're not concerned about relationships and like, building that intimacy. And so you just do it less. Like, it's just probably what happens. But I thought that was crazy. So maybe the population decline is also because of bedrot. There's got to be something there. This episode of de influence is brought to you by Huggy's little Snugglers. Okay, parents, let's be real. There are plenty of things in parenthood you can improvise. Dinner, sure. Nap schedule, sometimes. But when it comes to diaper blowouts, that's not the time to wing it. I learned this the hard way one night at a time. I had just finished giving Stratton a bath. 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But it's so funny because there's so many millennials on the Internet that, like, they haven't taken over because, like, we created this thing. You know what I mean? Like, we're the ones that gave you all the apps that you're using now. So. So we're still here. Everybody finds us so cringe, you know, like, because we're so millennial and we still dress this way. And we were wearing skinny jeans and side parts and all the things. I'm like, but we made this place. So I looked up, like, some of the differences. Oh, sorry, I just wrote this. I looked at some of the differences between Gen Z and Millennials and I wanted to kind of get yalls input. And if you're a Gen Z listening to this podcast, like, that's crazy. Like, wow, thank you. I feel so honored. I had a girl come up to me at Highland Park Village the other day and she was like 9, and she was like, hi, I love your videos. And I was like. I was like, but I love you. Like, you're so young. It's so crazy. So millennials are born between 1981 and 1996. Okay. See, I'm not far, that far off. I was born in 1992, so there's only four years off. Okay. We grew up during the rise of the Internet. We grew up during 9, 11, and we grew up during the 2008 recession. I remember that like, so well. We were kind of like the digital pioneers. We created MySpace. We had dial up Internet. Like, you had to. Oh, my gosh. Getting on Internet was like such. It was like such a thing. Like, like, it was crazy. Like, you Couldn't get on the Internet, like, sneakily, because, like, it was like, this noise was throughout your entire home. It was crazy. You know, we developed Facebook. Well, thank you, Mark. Millennials built all the apps that everybody uses to this day. You know, it's crazy because, like, I used to have to fax in my doctor's notes, like, whenever I would be, like, either late to school or if I was, like, missing school, I. I had to fax them into the school. And, like, Gen Z probably doesn't even know what that means. Like, we also are, like, the pioneers of hustle culture. So we're kind of like the ones that were the burnout generation. Personally, I think it's because, like, a lot of our parents were boomers, and, like, therapy was like, a. No, like, you were a loser to our parents if you went to therapy. Like, my parents always, like, made fun of, like, the kids that had to go to therapy. It was like, a joke. And she would, like, they'd be like, well, at least, you know, so and so's in therapy. Like, it was like, the way that you, like, insult someone. And I put therapy was for losers. And let me tell you, mental illness, like, anxiety or depression did not exist. Like, you told your parents that, and they're like, okay, you have a lot to be thankful for. Get up. We're going. Like, we did not have mental illness or anything. And I think because of our. Our parents, we're so. A lot of them were so, like, into, like, the American dream or, like, this traditional way of, like, raising a family. Like, it was like, our. Our parents raised us to, like, if you want something, you go after and get it. You prove yourself. I don't care if you stay up all night. Like, just work for it. The harder you work, the better off you'll be. And so that's kind of what we were taught. So then we come out here, we start making apps and working our booties off, and then we burn out, and we have all these mental illnesses, but because we don't know how to handle our emotions because nobody ever taught us. So, yeah, we're ahead of. We're heads of hustle culture. We were really into job security. That's literally because of our parents, like, and benefits. Like, my dad only cared about benefits. He never asked about the salary or, like, where I was working. It was like, well, what benefits do you get? Do you get health insurance? Do you get. You. Do you get car insurance? Do you get the. And I'm like, dad. But, like, I don't Want to work for anyone else. Like, I want to work for myself and be a YouTuber. And he was like, absolutely not. There's no benefits. Job security was important to a lot of us that I think it's just because, like, our parents kind of instilled that in us. Like, you. You, like, if you're going to be successful, you could be a doctor or lawyer. Like, that's just. That's what's up. So that's what we were taught. And then because of the recession, like, I don't know if a lot of y'. All. If a lot of millennials, like, were. If you remember the recession. Like, but when your parents were working, like, I remember the recession happening, and I remember walking in the kitchen and my mom and dad were praying, and they didn't know it was in there. But, like, my dad was like, I don't know how we're gonna, like, make it, like, so fearful about the recession. And. And I remember being like, oh, my gosh, we're gonna have to move out our house. Like, what are we gonna do? And everything ended up being great and okay. But, like, that. I think if our parents struggled during that time, that's probably why we valued stability, because we were like, we don't want to go through, like, what our parents went through because I was scary. Our obsessions are Harry Potter, Marvel movies, avocado toast, brunch, minimalism. We loved experiences over stuff. And I think the reason that happened is also because our parents were hoarders, because they didn't know when it was going to leave. And so we, like, were so sick of all the crap in our homes that when we left and wanted to live on our own, we're like, we're not going to have a lot of crap. We want to pay more for experiences to. Because we saw how having all the crap didn't make our parents happy. So maybe we'll find happiness in experiences. And so I think that's probably kind of where we're at. We created meme culture. That's right, meme culture. We created viral content. We created, you know, Airbnb. Airbnb. Like, experiences over things. We created food trucks, music, festival culture, Uber Lyft, Door Dash, Postmates, side Hustles, freelancing, Etsy and Shopify, basically everything that everybody uses these days. So you're welcome music. We liked emo pop, pop punk, Fallout Boy, Paramore, Avril Lavigne, early Taylor Swift, Britney Spears, you know, all the good stuff. Backstreet Boys. We became obsessed with authenticity. We killed magazines. We literally killed traditional advertising. Like, our generation killed it. We just killed it. Like, it doesn't work anymore. And that was because of us, because we hated traditional ads. And we wanted more authenticity. We wanted to see normal looking people on ads, in commercials, on TV, on YouTube. And that's why we, like, took off with like, content creation. Like, we were the ones that were like, we're sick of seeing the perfect girl wearing Maybelline makeup. We're sick of not seeing diversity. We're sick of seeing a size 2 everywhere. That's not realistic. And so we changed that. It's true. So then you have Gen Z. They were born 1997 to 2012. They are now teenagers to their mid-20s. They grew up with smartphones, they grew up with social media, you know, all the apps that we created from day one. And they came up during COVID which is scary. They had 24. 7 access to information. Gen Z, they're the digital natives. They grew up with all of the luxuries. And the only downfall of all of that information is it created probably a shorter attention span with Gen Z, which just means that, like, authenticity and like, getting your message across, like, is really important to them because they're not here for the fluff. Like, they're not going to put up with it. And honestly, they don't have to because they can go find something else to do, like, something else to watch. They're more entrepreneurial than millennials. They are more open to freelance, to like just having gigs, like gig work. They prioritize mental health over inflexible work hours, over, you know, their careers in climbing the corporate ladder. So a lot of them are actually mentally more healthy. I don't know all of them. But like, they, as a generation, they prioritize mental health, which I think is great because, like, then when they raise kids, they're going to be able to help their kids recognize their emotions. I think it would be awesome. Their consumer habits, they hate polished anything. I mean, they want raw. Like, they just want it straight up how it is. They don't like anything like that feels like an ad. It's inauthentic. They will cancel brands that they do not like. So you better watch out. Because they are outspoken about brands that they do not trust and they have the time to cancel you. So they love thrifting, they love sustainable products. Probably because they're just so sick of like all the consumerism and seeing everything because they've seen it since day one. All of us are like, I'm Still, I'm still shook about the fact that I can Amazon prime something. Like, it's still to this day, like, shooks me to my core because, like, I remember going off to college and not having Amazon prime and like anytime you wanted something, you had to drive all the way to the sketchy Walmart or wherever you're going and like go find it. And they never had in stock and then you had to go order online and assemble. It didn't work. So you go stand in line at the return. So I mean, it was like a nightmare. And so like, they're just really used to instant gratification. And like, we, I think we still are like, oh my God, I'm like, I get on the Uber, I'm like, this is so crazy. Like, this is wild. Like, I'm riding in somebody's car. Like, it's as wild. So I think that they, they love the novelty probably of thrifting. They like, they like the sustainability because of the story behind it too. Because they're just like, so over all of the things. They value creators that feel like friends and they love short form content. Their values is they expect brands just take a stand on issues. They want you to be outspoken. They're outspoken and they're inclusive, which I think is great. They're open about mental health, depression, anxiety, burnout. When it comes to pop culture, they love trends, they love messy, unfiltered photo dumps. They're really into diy, learning, online gaming, creating content. And they're so good at naming micro aesthetics like the core culture, like Barbie core or coastal core or clean girl aesthetic. Like, they're just very savvy because they've always had all of that, like, digital influence and so they just know how to work it. And I think a lot of us are like the Millennials. We're still like, oh my God, I can't believe we have this. And we're kind of just like thankful for what we have online. But yeah, I really think, like, I know that each generation kind of gives each other like a hard time, but I think it's really cool how Gen Z has kind of taken what Millennials kind of started off with. And I do feel like for the most part they're trying to use it for good. You know, I think the downfall of growing up with their smartphone, like since day one, is just probably building like, relationships with people has to be probably more challenging because, like, we were kind of forced to do that. Like, we didn't have anybody to talk to. So, like, we had to run over to our neighbor's house. But overall, Gen Z, I respect you. I like you a lot. I think you're gonna do great things, and I think it's cool that y' all prioritize mental health. That's cool. Okay, guys, let's see what else. I have, like, five more topics, but I don't really think I should go over them because I've been talking for an hour and four minutes, and that's pretty dang good. So maybe I'll save some of them for next time. I would love for you guys to check us out on Instagram and Tick Tock or D Influence Podcast. You know, let me know if you like these solo episodes. It actually is really helpful whenever you guys tell me, like, topics that you want me to cover, too. Jordan will be back, but right now, you know, it's all up to Mama. I got it, though. It's all good. Okay, I love you guys. We'll talk to you later. Bye. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.