Podcast Summary: Dear Chelsea – Episode: Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky
Release Date: July 10, 2025
Introduction
In this compelling episode of Dear Chelsea, host Chelsea Handler teams up with co-host Catherine Law and special guest Monica Lewinsky to delve into deep and personal topics surrounding reclaiming one’s life and identity. Monica, renowned for her candid discussions on her podcast Reclaiming, brings her unique perspective on personal growth, healing, and navigating complex emotions.
Main Discussion
Understanding "Reclaiming"
Monica Lewinsky introduces the core concept of her podcast, Reclaiming, emphasizing the multifaceted nature of reclaiming one's voice and narrative. She explains:
“In many ways, it's both personal to me, and I think the way that I see the world... It's like one of those things that we're gonna be thinking about and seeing our world through that lens a bit more...” [03:29]
Monica likens reclaiming to modern trauma, highlighting its significance in everyday life and personal development. She discusses how reclaiming encompasses both significant life events and smaller, daily moments where one strives to regain control and maintain composure.
Personal Anecdotes on Managing Rage
The conversation takes a light-hearted yet insightful turn as Monica and Catherine share their struggles with different types of rage:
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Monica on Road Rage:
“I have really bad road rage. So, like, it's a reclaiming for me when I call someone a fuck face, but then I don't flip them off. I'm like, I pulled my calm back.” [04:07]
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Catherine on Temperature Rage:
“I have rage about temperature. I have rage about, like, the temperatures of, like, refrigerated items... I just did this here in this podcast studio. It was a fudgeing medium warm, like a tiny bit cold Diet Coke.” [05:06]
These anecdotes not only provide humor but also shed light on the daily challenges of maintaining emotional balance.
Relationships with Family and Friends
Monica and Catherine explore the dynamics of familial relationships, particularly focusing on aunts and their influence:
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Monica’s Relationship with Her Aunts: Monica recounts memories of her aunts, highlighting the support and unique bonds they share.
“I have a very close relationship with one of my aunts, my mom's sister... I see parts of them in me from that and in my formative memories.” [21:47]
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Catherine’s Experiences: Catherine shares her experiences with her aunt and cousins in California, emphasizing the importance of diverse familial relationships.
“I have an aunt that I'm pretty close to. She lives in California... she explained to me why you never have overhead lighting in any house unless it's a chandelier.” [22:32]
Anecdote: The Lighting Incident
A memorable part of the episode is Monica’s humorous yet relatable story about how poor lighting affected a date:
“I wanted to do that confident girl thing where I'm gonna, like, walk him to the door naked... I saw the look on his face change. And the invitation for him to cook me dinner never materialized.” [14:28]
This story underscores the impact of environment on personal interactions and relationships.
Nurturing Relationships with Children Without Parenthood
Catherine shares insights from her book about fostering non-judgmental relationships with nieces and nephews, emphasizing the importance of being a safe space for children.
“They will come to me with anything, whether it's drug related, guy related, sex... I never... can reserve judgment with regard to these three people in my life.” [19:13]
Monica echoes the sentiment, discussing her close relationship with her own aunts and the nurturing environment they provide.
Advice to Callers
The heart of Dear Chelsea lies in its interactive segment where Chelsea, Catherine, and Monica provide thoughtful advice to listeners' heartfelt questions.
Caller 1: Jules from D.C. – Coping with Professional and Personal Stress [29:03]
Jules's Situation: Jules, a federal government employee, expresses overwhelming stress due to political uncertainties, a demanding commute, financial strains, and fear of job termination.
Advice Provided:
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Catherine emphasizes creating boundaries between work and personal life, suggesting activities like meditation, exercise, and reading to cultivate a positive mindset.
“Whatever it takes to get you there... you just need a break from the constant.” [32:17]
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Monica encourages finding compassion for herself and possibly understanding the other person's perspective, advocating for self-care and surrounding oneself with supportive friends.
“Maybe holding some space for what she might be experiencing... open up about your feelings with no judgment.” [54:32]
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Chelsea suggests maintaining a cheerful demeanor when reaching out and not assuming negative intentions.
“If you do reach out, I would just kinda be cheerful and say, hey, and how are ya?” [55:42]
Caller 2: Jeremy – Navigating Multiple Losses [37:10]
Jeremy's Situation: A 43-year-old gay man grappling with the loss of his dog, mother, and partner within a single year, leading to profound feelings of emptiness and questioning the purpose of continuing.
Advice Provided:
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Catherine advises viewing the difficult period as a transition and an opportunity for rebirth, encouraging Jeremy to honor his grief while looking forward to new beginnings.
“This is a transition. And so just honor the transition you're going through...” [41:44]
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Monica highlights the importance of connecting with loved ones and finding ways to remember and honor the deceased, suggesting that their energy remains with him.
“Feel free to speak to her. Feel free to talk to her. Feel free to know that she's coming to Greece with you.” [42:32]
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Chelsea recommends maintaining a gratitude journal to focus on daily joys and acknowledging small positive moments.
“Writing down one thing, even if it's only one thing, every day that brings you a small amount of joy...” [44:29]
Caller 3: Jen – Being Ghosted During Pregnancy [50:04]
Jen's Situation: Jen shares her hurt over a long-term friendship that dwindled during her pregnancy, leading to feelings of abandonment and questioning whether to seek closure.
Advice Provided:
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Catherine advises letting the friendship go, focusing on current supportive friendships, and not seeking answers that may not be forthcoming.
“I would really just focus on your friends that you have and just move on.” [52:07]
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Monica suggests approaching the situation with compassion, considering the other person's possible unawareness of their actions, and maintaining a friendly outreach without heavy expectations.
“Try to step into maybe a little bit of compassion for her.” [53:01]
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Chelsea encourages reaching out in a cheerful and non-confrontational manner if Jen feels the need for closure.
“Maybe reach out in a general friendly way. Like, hey, was thinking about you, how are you?” [55:42]
Closing Remarks
The episode concludes with Monica Lewinsky reiterating the importance of nurturing current relationships while understanding that friendships can ebb and flow over time. Catherine announces her upcoming performances in Las Vegas, and Chelsea reminds listeners to reach out via email for future advice queries.
Monica also promotes her podcast Reclaiming, emphasizing its availability on major platforms including YouTube and Wondery.
Notable Quotes
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Monica Lewinsky on Reclaiming:
“Reclaiming is like modern trauma. It’s one of those things that we’re gonna be thinking about and seeing our world through that lens a bit more.” [03:29]
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Catherine on Temperature Rage:
“There's nothing grosser than that. You know what I mean?” [05:36]
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Monica on Aesthetic Impact:
“I will get some new mugs. I have one that says, don't be a dick. It makes me laugh.” [33:38]
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Catherine on Moving Forward:
“Don't be a victim. You can lift yourself up out of it.” [41:44]
Conclusion
This episode of Dear Chelsea offers a blend of humor, heartfelt advice, and personal anecdotes, all underscored by Monica Lewinsky's insightful perspectives on reclaiming one's life. Listeners are encouraged to navigate their personal challenges with resilience, compassion, and a supportive community.