Decisions, Decisions – Episode Summary

Episode Title: You’ve Got Decisions: Am I Moving on Too Fast?
Podcast: Decisions, Decisions
Hosts: Mandii B and WeezyWTF
Date: September 3, 2025
Producer: The Black Effect & iHeartPodcasts

Episode Overview

In this candid episode, Mandii B and WeezyWTF explore the complexities of moving on after a long-term relationship, challenging social norms and personal guilt often associated with dating, sex, and new beginnings. Using real listener questions, personal anecdotes, and their signature blend of unfiltered advice and humor, the hosts dive into themes of sexual exploration, friendship boundaries, and emotional clarity.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introducing New Experiences in Relationships

[00:06 – 02:10]

• Weezy sparks discussion around introducing new sexual experiences:

  "How do you do it? Mandii and I are always saying, through porn. Set the scene..." (00:06)

• Des, a guest, offers an alternative:

  "Lately I’ve been using clips from my podcast... just, you know, testing the waters." (00:23)

• The hosts discuss the value of communication and creative methods (like sharing podcast clips) for broaching sexual kinks with partners.

2. Navigating Sexual Performance Anxiety & Finding Validation

[01:29 – 06:10]

• Des shares a deeply personal account of overcoming sexual performance anxiety after a toxic relationship:

  "I developed sexual performance anxiety. Wasn’t confident about my body... I use my podcast to learn about my sexual needs and how to communicate better." (01:29)

• Des segments experiences for the podcast ("Try it for the Podcast") and seeks professional sexual empowerment by hiring renowned sex worker King Noir.

3. The Logistics (and Costs) of Professional Dom Sessions

[03:45 – 05:36]

• Des details the consultation process, exploring his own kinks and desired experiences (flogging, sensory play).
• The group discusses financial realities:

  "It was from $2500 to $2000." – Des (04:33) "Anyone we’ve had on this podcast and talked to... they not cheap." – Mandii B. (04:45)

4. Describing the Session: Safety, Trust, and Affirmation

[06:10 – 10:12]

• Des offers a vivid, step-by-step retelling of the session, including booking logistics, vulnerability around nudity, and the power dynamic:

  "He was like, from here on out, every time you talk to me, you have to say, 'yes, King, sir.'" – Des (08:09)

• The importance of safe words is underscored with a real-life example:

  "Red means you stop everything. I was like, all right, yellow." (08:40)

• The host panel praises the way boundaries, communication, and aftercare are handled:

  "Now we know what a safeword really should be. Looking like everything, including music. The lights back on, too..." — Mandy B. (09:28)

• Emotional affirmations are given during the session to rebuild confidence:

  "Your body's beautiful. Whatever your ex put into you is poison." – Recalled by Des (09:59)

Listener Letter: "Am I Moving On Too Fast?"

[15:37 – 27:00]

Context

• Listener Des (not to be confused with the guest above), recently out of an 11-year relationship (with two kids), wonders if having started casual sex about 10-11 months post-breakup is "too fast," especially as her ex wants reconciliation and her best friend is critical.

Key Points

Mandii B. on Friend Boundaries

"I just say, if you like it, I love it, sis... I normally come to my friends and share the dirt after I already did it. Cause, bitch, I wasn't gonna care what you said anyways." (16:41)

• You aren’t obligated to process or share every relationship move with friends, especially critical ones.
• Establish boundaries: It's okay to ask friends to be supportive or refrain from unsolicited negativity.

On Moving on and Guilt Toward an Ex

• Nearly a year out makes it entirely reasonable to be dating or having sex with someone new.
• Guilt about hurting an ex’s feelings is natural but shouldn’t impede your progress:

  "I do not believe at all that you are 'moving too fast.' I also don't think at this point personally you should be considering the feelings of your baby daddy. If you have not been with him for 10 or 11 months... it's called manipulation." (25:34)

Advice on Emotional Clarity

• Mandii points out that if the only tie left is co-parenting, that's what you owe your ex–not romantic consideration.
• If guilt continues, it may signal some unresolved feelings and the need for self-reflection.
• Cut the emotional ties; don't double-dip sexually or emotionally if you intend to move forward:

  "You either move the fuck on, or you don't… Stand firm on business." (27:00)

On Friend Criticism

• Two approaches for handling negative friends:
  • Kind: Kindly ask for support or no commentary.
  • Toxic/Real: "Call out where they fucked up, but you let them... live in their fuckery." (21:04)
  • Panelist Court chimes in: "That's just how I 100% keep it real... don't lecture me on accountability when you can't take it.” (23:08)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Weezy, on non-traditional introductions:

  "Not porn, but you're just showing conversations just like." (00:35)

• Des, on confidence after toxic relationships:

  "I was insecure about my body, and I just want to build that confidence back." (07:23)

• On the impact of safe words:

  "Red means you stop everything. I was like, all right, yellow." (08:40)

• Mandii B., on living your truth:

  "You either move the fuck on, or you don't… Stand firm on business." (27:00)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:06 – 02:10: Introducing sexual experiences to partners
• 01:29 – 06:10: Sexual performance anxiety and seeking professional guidance
• 03:45 – 05:36: Logistics (and financial aspects) of hiring a professional
• 06:10 – 10:12: Describes session, boundaries, and positive affirmation
• 15:37 – 27:00: Listener letter: "Am I moving on too fast?" – Deep dive discussion

Tone and Language

The episode stays true to Mandii B and Weezy’s signature style: raw, humorous, vulnerable, and explicit. They balance comedic banter with deeply honest reflections, normalizing adult conversations about sex, self-worth, and relationship boundaries.

Summary & Takeaways

• Moving on from a long-term relationship is highly individual. There is no universal "too soon."
• Surround yourself with supportive people; build boundaries as needed.
• Guilt for pursuing your happiness after a breakup is common but shouldn't control your choices.
• Affirming sexual exploration and consulting professionals can be a path to reclaiming self-confidence and healing.
• Open, direct communication (with partners, friends, and oneself) is key to navigating messy, transitional periods post-breakup.

If you’re considering new beginnings after a breakup, recognize your agency, set clear boundaries—with friends and exes alike—and center your decisions on your well-being and joy.