Podcast Summary: Deepen with Pastor Joby Martin

Episode: S24E3, "When Men Stand, Families Flourish"
Host: Pastor Joby Martin
Guests: Dr. Pastor Matt Carter, (co-hosts/staff voices not fully identified)
Date: November 3, 2025

Episode Overview

In this episode, Pastor Joby Martin and Dr. Pastor Matt Carter unpack themes from the latest sermon in the "Stand Firm, Act Like Men" series at The Church of Eleven22. The discussion focuses on the spiritual and practical importance of men standing up for their families, the significance of spiritual warfare, intentional parenting, and how both men and women can fight for their homes and communities. The tone is candid, vulnerable, and passionate, blending biblical exposition with anecdotes, challenge, and encouragement for churchgoers—especially men—to take up their role as protectors, servants, and spiritual leaders.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Influence and Responsibility of Men in Families

• The episode opens with light banter and a personal story about the influence of Pastor Joby's teaching on a family road trip—teasing out the topic of defense and protection of one's household (00:31).
• The conversation quickly deepens into men's responsibility as protectors, not just physically but spiritually and emotionally, referencing Ephesians and biblical manhood.

Notable Quotes:

"In this series on Stand firm and act like men, remember, our founders believe that those rights came from God." — Pastor Joby (01:33)

• Prayer and intentionality are highlighted as critical for effective spiritual leadership at home.

2. The Spiritual Battle and the Role of Prayer

• The enemy is described as "not a nuisance, but a lion," drawing on a sermon quote about taking spiritual warfare seriously (03:22).
• Prayer is explored as the first line of defense not only against physical threats but the spiritual ones attacking families.

Notable Quotes:

"Prayer will actually reveal what you think about the enemy and the intensity of the battle you’re in...if you don’t have the soul-searching puddle of tear on the floor—chain breaking prayers ever—what are you doing? You’re not in the battle." — Pastor Joby (03:56)

• Powerful personal stories and analogies underscore the intensity with which a father would fight to protect his family.
• The recurring illustration of ancient soldiers standing side by side with shields interlocked—families fighting together—grounds the spiritual concept in practical imagery (07:16–08:38).

Notable Quotes:

"We’re in a fight right now with the enemy that makes that [ancient battle] look like a trip to Disneyland." — Matt Carter (08:38)

3. Parenting with Intentionality

• Intentional parenting is central: fathers are urged to proactively engage their children's hearts (15:06–18:34).

Timestamps:

• [15:06] The challenge of connecting with children whose "hearts are elusive".
• [17:22] The wisdom that parents really have until age 16 (not 18) to lay their foundation.

Notable Quotes:

"When they’re 16, 17, 18, you have seven or eight significant touch points a year." — Matt Carter (17:22)

• Pastor Joby's strategy involves focusing on heart, soul, mind, and strength—the Shema—as a relational filter for conversations with his kids (18:34).

4. Fighting for Families and the Church Community

• Protection isn't just physical; it's spiritual and emotional—standing on the "wall" for spouses, kids, and the church body.
• The role of elders and spiritual leaders is emphasized, with several stories of accountability, support, and practical provision. Pastor Joby recounts how his church elders provided financially to help his wife become a stay-at-home mom during the church launch (28:04–29:23).
• The interconnectedness of families and church members is celebrated—"fighting for another generation" and for the spiritual health of the whole church family (29:24–31:06).

Notable Quotes:

"This sermon isn’t just about fighting for your family. It’s about fighting for your church. It’s about fighting for another generation." — Pastor Joby (29:24)

5. The Enemy’s Schemes & The Need for Vigilance

• The enemy is actively plotting like a military general, seeking strategic weaknesses in families (22:36).
• Success itself can be a snare, drawing men’s attention away from their families (23:58–24:51).

Notable Quotes:

"God, I mean, the enemy may give you sweets or bitters, he cares not as long as it gets your eyes off the Savior." — Pastor Joby, quoting Spurgeon (23:37)

• A football analogy captures how the enemy seeks out vulnerabilities—"How cool would it be if Satan...talking to his offensive coordinator...goes, 'Joby Martin? There is none.'" — Matt Carter (26:15)

6. The Importance of Accountability & Spiritual Community

• Elders play a strong protective role for the pastor—and, by extension, the church (27:02–34:04).
• Modeling transparency, Joby describes accountability practices with his elders, who even review his tax returns to guard against common ministry pitfalls.

Notable Quotes:

"It’s out of love. At one point, they told me to sell the house I was in and buy a bigger one...They walked us through that." — Pastor Joby (32:08–32:26)

• Everyone is urged to seek out spiritual mentors and community, regardless of position or marital status (32:51–33:09).

7. Practical Ways to Fight for Others

• The "armor of God" from Ephesians 6 is presented as a framework: prayer, scripture ("it is written"), knowledge of the gospel, identity in Christ, and serving others are tools for spiritual protection (35:49–37:32).
• Dads are urged to affirm their wives and children against the lies of the enemy—especially regarding identity and self-worth (37:32–40:04).

Notable Quotes:

"Nobody talks about my girl like that in that house, all right? You trust me, I got good taste. You’re my taste." — Pastor Joby (39:03)

8. Bringing Peace into the Home

• Men are challenged to bring peace, not fear, when they walk in the door (40:05–42:45).

Notable Quotes:

"Does peace walk in with you?" — Pastor Joby (40:21)

• Joby and Matt discuss practical marital communication, transitioning from work mode to home mode, and negotiation to meet each other’s needs (44:00–44:19, 44:38, 45:58).

9. Encouragement for Single Mothers & Women Without Male Support

• Grace abounds where the ideal is unrealized. Biblical examples (Mary, mother of Jesus; Timothy's mother and grandmother) show God’s ability to use single mothers powerfully.
• The church's commitment to support and fight for single moms and women is reiterated (49:20–51:29).
• Fostering community: Pastor Joby and his wife intentionally invite singles—especially single women—into their home and family life (51:29–53:27).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [03:56] — "Prayer will actually reveal what you think about the enemy and the intensity of the battle you’re in." — Pastor Joby
• [08:38] — "We’re in a fight right now with the enemy that makes that look like a trip to Disneyland." — Matt Carter
• [17:22] — "When they turn 16, they get a car, they get a job, they get a boyfriend or girlfriend, they start..." — Matt Carter
• [23:37] — "God, I mean, the enemy may give you sweets or bitters, he cares not as long as it gets your eyes off the Savior." — Pastor Joby
• [26:15] — "How cool would it be if Satan...goes, ‘Joby Martin? There is none [no weakness].’" — Matt Carter
• [40:21] — "When you walk in a door, does peace walk in with you?" — Pastor Joby
• [49:20] — "Where the ideal is unrealized, grace abounds. So a little bit of encouragement to the single mama: at some point Jesus was raised by a single mom." — Pastor Joby

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Physical and Spiritual Protection: 00:31–01:54
• The Role of Prayer & Spiritual Warfare: 03:22–04:30
• Shield of Faith Analogy: 07:16–08:38
• Intentional Parenting / Limited Years with Kids: 15:06–18:34
• Accountability & Elders' Protection: 27:02–34:04
• "Armor of God" as Practical Battle Plan: 35:49–37:32
• Affirming Identity in Family: 37:32–40:04
• Ensuring Peace at Home / Practical Marital Insight: 40:05–44:38
• Wisdom for Single Parents & Church Family as Support: 49:20–53:27
• Final Charge & Prayer: 54:01–54:41

Takeaways for Listeners

• Men are called to actively protect and spiritually lead their families: by prayer, intentional presence, and providing emotional/spiritual cover.
• Prayer is the front line against spiritual attack: more than a ritual, it's evidence of one’s engagement in spiritual warfare for loved ones.
• Parent intentionally, maximizing limited formative years: prioritize connection over activity; ask deeper questions.
• Create a culture of spiritual accountability: find and invest in spiritual mentors, elders, or trusted mature believers.
• Fight for identity and peace in the home: speak life and truth over spouses and children, and ensure your presence brings calm, not fear.
• The church family must stand in the gap for single parents and the vulnerable: extend hospitality, mentoring, and practical support.

For Reflection

• Men: Do your prayers and presence reflect the spiritual battle for your family? Does peace walk in when you do?
• Parents: Are you maximizing your intentional touch points with your kids, aiming for heart-level connection?
• Everyone: Who are your spiritual mentors or elders? Are you linked arm-in-arm with the family of God in battle?

Closing Prayer:
"Fight. This is not an illustration. This is an actual event...the enemy is trying to take out this generation, dude. And we have to stand on that wall and fight, fight, fight, fight, fight...our weapons of warfare are not of the flesh, you know, but God has equipped us to go to battle. That’s it. Let’s pray. Our good and gracious Heavenly Father, we love you. We thank you that we can fight because you fought for us. May we never forget it. In Jesus name, Amen." — Pastor Joby (54:01)

This rich conversation is a rallying cry for men and women to fight for faith, family, and community—with prayer, intentionality, humility, and the support of the church body.