Design Matters with Debbie Millman: Episode Featuring Carol Leifer

Release Date: April 7, 2025

Overview

In this episode of Design Matters with Debbie Millman, host Debbie Millman engages in a deep and insightful conversation with Carol Leifer, a renowned stand-up comedian, award-winning comedy writer, and producer. Carol shares her extensive journey in the comedy world, offering valuable lessons on resilience, creativity, and the nitty-gritty of making it in show business. This episode not only delves into Carol’s illustrious career but also explores her latest venture—a book aimed at helping individuals craft funny speeches for various occasions.

Early Inspirations and Beginnings in Comedy

Influences and Family Background

Carol Leifer begins by reflecting on her early inspirations, notably citing Wayne Newton as her favorite performer growing up. She emphasizes the importance of enthusiasm in performance, stating:

"He always gave it 1000%. That was very clear even on TV. And that really resonated with me that if you want to be a performer, you got to go out there with 1,000%" [00:05:14].

Carol grew up in a household rich with humor, thanks to her parents, Anna and Seymour. Her father, an optometrist, was the "king of the joke tellers," using humor as a bridge to connect with patients and others. This environment fostered Carol's love for comedy from a young age.

First Steps into Comedy

Carol recounts her initial foray into the comedy scene, influenced by her Uncle Bernie, a writer for Let's Make a Deal. Her first audition was a disaster:

"I made the appointment with the producer... I ended up a half an hour late... I broke every rule of what you do when you want a job." [00:10:48].

However, this experience did not deter her. Instead, it reinforced her determination to succeed in the face of rejection, a recurring theme throughout her career.

College Years and Formative Experiences

Binghamton College and Open Mic Nights

At SUNY Binghamton, Carol majored in English and Theater Arts, initially contemplating a career in comedy writing before fully embracing stand-up. A pivotal moment was her friendship with Paul Reiser, a comedy genius who encouraged her to perform at open mic nights. This led to her first successful stand-up performance, where she realized her passion for making people laugh.

"The first time I went on at this audition night, I just killed. And then the second time, I completely bombed." [00:22:11].

Building Resilience

Carol highlights the unpredictable nature of stand-up comedy, where even seasoned performers like Larry David can have off nights. Her insights into handling varied audience reactions demonstrate her deep understanding of the craft:

"As a comedian, you have to learn how to navigate all those incredibly potentially difficult situations." [00:24:16].

Breaking into the Industry

Landing Television Appearances

Carol's big break came in 1982 when she performed on The David Letterman Show. This rapid ascent from open mic stages to national television was a testament to her talent and perseverance. She reflects on her relationship with Letterman and how his support was instrumental in her success:

"After my first time on the show, he said, whenever you're ready with new material, you call us and you come right on. That doesn't happen at a lot of places." [00:35:58].

Facing Rejection and Persisting

Despite her successes, Carol faced numerous rejections, particularly from The Tonight Show. She auditioned 22 times before finally securing a spot three months before Johnny Carson's retirement. Her approach to rejection is both pragmatic and empowering:

"My theory, my motto is always take no for an answer because you're going to get a lot of rejection." [00:59:xx].

Writing and Expanding Horizons

Saturday Night Live and Beyond

In the mid-1980s, Carol auditioned for Saturday Night Live (SNL), where she was offered a writing position instead of a performing role. She describes her time at SNL during a tumultuous period dubbed "The Weird Year" due to the unconventional mix of talent:

"It was the weirdest year, with Lauren coming back after not being there for five years and the cast of this really melange of odd, great performers." [00:45:17].

Despite the challenges, Carol values the experience for the opportunity to write alongside legendary figures like Jack Handy and Robert Smigel.

Contributions to Iconic Shows

Carol’s writing prowess extended to top-tier shows such as Seinfeld, where she penned memorable episodes inspired by real-life experiences. Her ability to distill everyday humor into relatable content is a hallmark of her writing style.

"The germ of any sitcom is really so much in the idea... make it clear and quick." [00:51:06].

Current Projects and Philosophies

Latest Book: "How to Write a Funny Speech"

During the writers' strike, Carol co-authored a book with Rick Mitchell aimed at helping individuals craft humorous speeches for events like weddings and graduations. The book provides templates, jokes, and step-by-step guidance, emphasizing brevity and personal anecdotes over formality.

"We wanted to make it really short and sweet. You don't need Encyclopedia Britannica." [00:62:43].

Resilience and Advocacy

Carol underscores the importance of resilience in any creative field. Her personal mantra—embracing rejection as part of the journey—serves as motivational advice for aspiring comedians and writers alike.

"You can control what you can control, and you can't control what you can't control." [00:55:59].

Memorable Quotes and Insights

• On Rejection and Persistence:

  "There is so much rejection along the way. If you can accept that you're going to be rejected a lot, I feel like you'll sail because people stop because of the rejection." [00:60:05].

• On Crafting Humor:

  "Funny in a speech really goes a long way. People can tend to drone on and on about the person. If you don't add some humor, it makes it boring." [00:65:42].

• On Pitching Ideas:

  "The pitching process at Seinfeld was you go into Larry and Jerry's office, and you bring in hopefully 20 ideas because the odds of them liking one or two are higher." [00:51:06].

Conclusion

Carol Leifer’s conversation with Debbie Millman on Design Matters offers a comprehensive look into the life of a resilient and creative individual who has navigated the ups and downs of the comedy industry with grace and humor. Her experiences—from early inspirations and overcoming rejection to writing for iconic television shows and authoring a practical guidebook—are not only inspiring but also provide actionable insights for anyone looking to make their mark in creative fields. Carol’s unwavering belief in taking rejection in stride and continuously advocating for oneself stands as a testament to her enduring success in the ever-evolving landscape of show business.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• “He always gave it 1000%. That was very clear even on TV.” – Carol Leifer [00:05:14]

• “I broke every rule of what you do when you want a job.” – Carol Leifer [00:10:48]

• “The first time I went on at this audition night, I just killed.” – Carol Leifer [00:22:11]

• “You can control what you can control, and you can't control what you can't control.” – Carol Leifer [00:55:59]

• “There is so much rejection along the way.” – Carol Leifer [00:60:05]

About Carol Leifer

Carol Leifer is a celebrated comedian, author, and writer with a career spanning over four decades. She has penned episodes for iconic television shows like Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm, and her recent book offers guidance on crafting humorous speeches for various life events. Carol continues to influence the comedy landscape with her sharp wit and profound insights into the art of humor and resilience.

For more information about Carol Leifer and her work, visit caraleifer.com.